


This Shit Is A Love Story

by JanetteK



Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age Inquisition - Fandom, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Happily Ever After, M/M, Miscarriage (about half way through), Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-04-29 08:08:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 53
Words: 367,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14468496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JanetteK/pseuds/JanetteK
Summary: “Gather round fine patrons of the Hanged Man. Here we have our very own Viscount Tethras to tell us a story.”“Thanks, Bran. You could laud my skills as a writer. Settle in, folks. Today, I’m going to tell the epic story of Inquisitor Athena Trevelyan and Commander Cullen Rutherford falling in love. This shit is a love story and a weird one too.”





	1. Chapter 1

Written by Varric Tethras

It was a dark and scary time. The sky, Veil, (this shit is weird) was torn asunder and demons poured through a gaping, green hole that we called the Breach. A savior, the Herald of Andraste, Athena Trevelyan, received the power to save Thedas and the world from evil. Along her journey to save the world from certain demise, she fell in love with Commander Cullen Rutherford.  
They met while Athena lay unconscious and dying from falling out of the Breach. Cullen would relieve Solas (an apostate elf… If we knew then what we know now… Ah well,) for the overnight watch. After he fought demons all day. Considering his past, this probably wasn’t the best watch for him to take... Years later, Cullen would tell me that he wasn’t able to sleep during those days anyway.

He studied Athena while she slept, wondering if she was a blood mage, if she woke up, would she tell the truth? Cullen also wondered if she was one of the few good and decent mages, that only used her powers to help and heal. As quickly as the hope came it would fade away and the torture of his memories would come again.

On some nights, memories of the fifth blight, and the torture that happened during that time would consume him. Other nights he would wonder what he could have to stop his former Knight Commander, castigating himself for not seeing the evil she had become until it was almost too late.

Athena cried out in her sleep at times, and stirred even more often. One night she opened her eyes and Cullen gasped at the beauty and pain he saw in those violet eyes. As Cullen was getting ready to speak, Athena moaned and shut her eyes tight, stilling to the point that Cullen thought she may have died. He rose to check on her to see if she was still breathing. When he determined that the prisoner was still alive, he decided that this was a restful, healing sleep. He was right. Athena woke up a day later.

The nightly vigils ended and Cullen thought he would be able to put her out of his mind to focus on the task of fighting the demons pouring through the Breach. He knew that if Cassandra had her way, Athena would be, at the very least, made tranquil. The most likely scenario was that Athena would die if she couldn’t close the rifts.

After a brutal interrogation by Cassandra, Athena was taken to the Breach. On the way, they had to fight demons, I was introduced to the lovely lady Athena along with Chuckles and off we went to fight more demons, close rifts, and meet with Leliana. Solas correctly guessed that the glowing green thing in Athena’s hand that was trying to kill her, would close the rifts.

**

Athena and Cullen's first meeting with both of them being conscious was on the battlefield. Cullen unceremoniously reminded her that a lot of people died to bring her to the ruined Temple of Sacred Ashes. Athena responded that she wanted to help, which surprised Cullen because he hadn’t expected her to care.

Athena was able to at least stop the hemorrhaging of demons from the Breach… The original tear in the veil (the veil is a wall-like thing that separates the waking world from the one of dreams, spirits, demons, and where, it is said, that the mages draw their abilities from.) 

When we returned to Haven, Athena was exonerated from murder and was asked to help with the Inquisition. With her new power of closing rifts in the veil, and her desire to set things to somewhat normal, or a new normal, she stayed on. Our soon to be lovers were able to talk some more.

Snow covered the ground (it wasn’t winter,) and with the world falling apart, it looked as though it was love at first, “Hey, I survived!” sight for our heroine. 

Even though Athena lived most of her life sheltered in a circle (debatably a mage prison,) she impressed me with how easily she got Cullen to blush. (It’s been years since they first met and she’s still able to get him to blush…) The poor guy turned bright red during their conversation. They talked mostly of the Inquisition, Cullen started to give a speech (he does that) and then stopped. Athena urged him on, he gently refused. And then, she smiled at Cullen, a shy, sweet smile that melted this jaded heart. After Athena left, I went to make sure Cullen was breathing okay, which apparently embarrassed him more. 

“She likes you,” I told him.

“No she doesn’t.” Cullen was grouchy, and desperately trying to hide rosy cheeks.

“She seems like a sweet lady, and she likes you.” I smirked, thinking, I am not going to let you out of this.

“Varric, can we talk of anything else?” There’s that blush again.

“Sure, Curly, want to play a game of Wicked Grace?” I was going to bring up Athena through playing, maybe even invite her to the game.

“I have a thousand things to do.” Cullen wouldn’t meet my gaze.

“You like her too,” my smirk got wider.

“I… I… I need to get back to work.” With that Cullen walked away and I went to my tent laughing.

**

Athena and I got to spend quite a lot of time together, fighting evil (I’ll get into that in a bit,) traversing and saving the world... One night she confided in me that even when she was with her family, before her magic started to show itself, she always felt like an outsider. Like she didn’t belong anywhere. 

Now, Athena was scared because all of Thedas and the world, was depending on her to succeed. What terrified her more was even though she had a rough start with being a prisoner and not knowing if she would survive, with us, she felt like she was a part of something. That she belonged somewhere. Athena was terrified that if she failed, she would lose us. The damn woman had me so choked up I couldn’t respond at first.

“Athena, you’re trying. You’re making good decisions. While I can’t speak for anyone else, except maybe Curly, even though he would deny it… No matter what happens, I’ll still be your friend.” I responded after I swallowed past the rather large lump in my throat.

“Who’s Curly?” Athena was bewildered, thinking that she hadn’t met this “Curly” yet.

“I give nicknames to just about everyone. “Curly” is Commander Cullen. Speaking of nicknames, we should come up with one for you.” 

Athena looked down at her hands, hiding a blush and a great deal of sadness, “I don’t think he cares for me.”

"Why would you say that?” I took a drink, wondering where she would get the idea that Cullen’s stammering and blushing meant he didn’t like her.

“Every time I ask about him he always turns back to… This,” she waved her left hand, and the hand glowed green.

"You like him, don’t you?” I pried. I wanted confirmation of the desire I was seeing.

“I do. I know it’s silly, and that nothing can or will come of it, after all I’m a Mage and he was a Templar, but when I met him… I felt… Oh, I don’t know, it’s silly.” Athena shrugged helplessly.

"You felt like everything stopped and it was just you and him. It’s not silly at all.” 

“Yes.” Athena blushed, “Thank you.” 

“Anytime.” I smiled at her. She smiled back and if smiles were anchors or rift closers, Corypheus would have been defeated that night by her smile alone.

I should take a little break and explain who Corypheus is. Corypheus, once upon a time, was a Tevinter magister who had come back from the dead to claim the Black City and become a god. He was the reason the sky was torn apart and why demons and darkspawn were invading Thedas… Again. He wanted to kill Athena because she had foiled his plans of getting in to the Fade (on accident at first.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those that struggle with reading, I have a link for the audio version. It’s free to listen to: https://www.patreon.com/posts/this-shit-is-24067796


	2. Chapter 2

Athena, being very sheltered, was horrendous at flirting. She had talked to Cullen of his Templar days and nervously asked if he had taken any vows of celibacy. I could see a blush starting to stain Curly’s cheeks when he replied that he hadn’t. To change the subject, he asked, “You are from the circle at Ostwick?”

“I am,” Athena answered, afraid of where this was going.

“I’m sorry, the circle isn’t a pleasant topic right now… Or ever. Would you like to discuss something else?” Cullen responded gently.

Par for the course, they turned back to discussing the Inquisition… These two wouldn’t know a flirt if it knocked them on the ground.

**

The Inquisition had been branded untouchable by the Chantry, we needed allies fast if Athena was to seal the hole in the sky. Cullen wanted to see us ally with the Templars, Leliana and Josephine wanted to ally with the rebel mages that were at Redcliffe. Athena just wanted them to make a decision. 

They decided to send her to Val Royeaux where the Chantry heads and Templars were meeting. While there, Athena was invited to Redcliffe by the leader of the rebel mages. Once we were in Redcliffe, Athena decided to ally and save the rebel mages (Corypheus had a Tevinter cult loyal to him called the Venatori.) She had a little help from saving the rebel mages from a Tevinter mage, Dorian (he’ll be important later on in the story. He still owes me quite a sum.)

When Athena got back to Haven (Haven was a small place with about ten rustic cabins and a Chantry,) Cullen was not happy with the decision to bring the mages in as allies. Cassandra was able to calm him by saying that Athena was willing to make a decision when no one else was, and to leave her alone. After calming down, Curly invited her to the war room saying that none of it would be possible without her.

Later that night I saw Athena walking around Haven. Curly saw her too and went over to talk, “I wanted to apologize for my outburst earlier. I’ve treated mages with distrust, that was unworthy of me, I will try not to do so here.” (Horrible at flirting.)

“Thank you. I…” Athena stopped, blushing bright red.

“Well…” Cullen cleared his throat, “I should let you get some rest.”

“Have a good night, Commander,” Athena responded softly.

“You as well,” and they went their separate ways, blushing the entire damn time.

With a lot of nagging, I got Curly to join me for a game of Wicked Grace in Haven’s cabin of a tavern. Dorian joined us. Dorian and I already had large soft spots for Athena and we worked out a plan where we could “bring her up” so we could gauge Cullen’s reaction. The poor woman wouldn’t stop mooning over him any time she saw him.

Dorian dealt out the cards first, “Commander, you do know how to play this, yes?”

“Yes.” Cullen responded, “but I prefer chess.”

“Then I don’t have to explain the rules to you.” Dorian smirked. “You were out with the Herald today, Varric?” 

“I was. The more time I spend with her, the more she impresses me.” 

“In what ways?” Dorian asked.

“Well, we weren’t too far out of Haven and she saw a nug that was limping. She remembered how much Leliana loved them, apologized for the detour, and while she was healing the thing, she said, “we must get this back to Haven so Leliana can have it.”

“Are you sure we can afford the delay?” I asked.

“Athena looked at me, got tears in her eyes, told us that when she was young she found a sick kitten, and nursed it back to health. The cat was her best friend, it followed her around, slept with her, did everything with her. A year later she came in to her powers, as she was petting the cat her powers went haywire, scaring the cat in to scratching her. As Athena raised her hand to look at the scratch, she…” I paused for dramatic effect, “Froze the cat. The next day she was shipped off to the Circle, and hasn’t had a pet since... So, I picked up the nug, carried it back to one of Nightingale’s scouts to give to Leliana. I got a report when we came back that the nug was now in the care of our spymaster.”

Dorian looked at his cards, “Commander, your bet.”

Cullen looked at Dorian in surprise,”I’m sorry?” 

“Your bet, Curly.” I repeated, and so the night went with Dorian and I trading stories, needless to say, Cullen lost.

The next morning while I was trying to convince Cullen to play another game, Athena walked up to us and smiled, “Hello.”

“Where are we off to today, Athena?” I asked her.

“I don’t know yet. Commander-“

“Cullen, please.” We both looked at Curly, shocked. He was doing away with formality?!

“Cullen… Leliana asked me to give this to you.” Athena handed him a piece of paper.

“Nightingale asked you to be a go between? I thought she had people for that.” I was puzzled by this. 

Athena smiled, a sad, little smile that I recognized all too well as the beginnings of an unrequited crush… Or so she thought.

“When you’re ready, let me know.” I responded.

“I will… Varric?” She stopped me as I started to walk away.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.” 

While we were talking Cullen read Leliana’s missive. He looked up from the paper and asked, “Herald, would you… Ah…” then mumbled, “I’m not good at this,” and then louder, “would you like to go for a walk with me?” 

Athena responded, “Sure.”

“Umm…well… Good. Do you have time now?”

“I do.” As Athena and Cullen passed the chantry Leliana, Josephine, and Dorian peeked out. We saw each other, they smiled. I laughed and walked over to the chantry to talk.

So we were safe from prying ears we went inside Haven’s chantry. I had to know, “What did the letter say?” 

“Oh, nothing important, really.” Josephine was trying not to laugh.

Leliana smiled at Ruffles, “I may have said that there was something that needed investigated and I couldn’t spare anyone.” 

“Gotta say, you never struck me as a match maker, Nightingale.” I remarked.

“I’m not, there very well may be something to investigate…” Leliana smirked and left.

“I think I should go back to work.” Josephine followed Leliana, humming to herself.

Dorian and I walked outside, we both looked at the sky where the breach was, and wondered if we weren’t adding more fuel to the end of the world. Dorian said, “They’re adorable together.”

"Yeah, they are. I just..." I looked at the breach again.

“I know.” 

We waited impatiently for Curly and Athena to get back from their walk. I asked how it was. Curly blushed, and said, “Fine. I need to get back to work,” He looked at Athena, “Be careful?” 

“I will,” Athena smiled at him, “Cullen?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you, it was lovely.” Athena cheeks turned pink. I had to take a large sip of my ale to keep from laughing.

Curly’s blush almost matched the color of the deep red of sunset when there wasn’t a green hole in the sky, “We’ll talk more at a later time.”

After Cullen left, Athena said, “I know you’re dying to ask, but we need to get Dorian and Cassandra first and get going.”

“Okay, boss. I really need to work on a nickname for you.” Athena laughed at my grumble.

**

The day, like most days, was fraught with danger and almost dying… Way too many times to count. Athena would always stop to help those in need from the smallest animal to the biggest brute. We… Well, she, closed any rift in the veil we would come across. When we stopped to eat, I took my chance. “So, Duchess, the walk?”

“Oh, Varric, please don’t have that be my nickname.” Athena said after taking a bite of her food.

“What’s wrong with Duchess? You’re one of the best of the nobility I’ve had the privilege of knowing.” Dorian chimed in as he sat down beside me.

“Thank you, Dorian. When I was a teen I had a crush on one of the Templars visiting my circle… Because they didn’t want to get too personal they would address us by titles, Ladies, Lords, and such. Somehow, the other Templars found out that I had a crush and they would make fun of me by saying I wasn’t good enough to be his. It went on for months, long after the crush had left. I finally got sick of the name calling and fought back by telling some of their secrets to the Knight-Commander. When they found out it was me, they…” Athena trailed off looking out the window, remembering the torment the Templars put her through.

“How did the Knight-Commander not discipline them?” Cassandra inquired as she sat down beside Dorian. Sparkler looked like he was ready to explode.

“He did, but that didn’t stop them. They thought they were better than everyone else. The Knight-Commander was a good man, he truly cared for us, he was almost like a father to me, but he and the First Enchanter had others working against them.”

"I had always heard Ostwick was an exemplary circle. I am so sorry.” Cassandra offered her condolences, thinking that this was something the Seeker’s should have looked into.

"It's okay. I'm away now, and I will never go back." Athena replied, “Varric, any other nickname and I’ll be fine with it.” 

“I’ll think about it. How about telling us about your walk?” I wanted to remove the haunted look from Athena’s violet eyes.

Athena got a dreamy look and a smile so large it could rival the size of the Waking Sea. “It was wonderful. We didn’t talk much except about the Inquisition. Cullen said that Leliana wrote that there was something to investigate. After walking for a while we came to a spot where a blanket was laid out with a basket of fruit, cheese, and wine. Almost as if someone set up a date.”

“Varric, you didn’t!” Cassandra exclaimed. For some reason, I’m the first one she blames for everything.

"It wasn't me, Seeker. I'm a story teller, not a match maker.” I looked back at Athena, anxious for all the details, “go on.”

“We sat and talked a little bit about our favorite spots as children. Then Cullen asked me the strangest question... He asked if I ever had a pet. After I told him about my cat, he apologized and said that he shouldn’t have asked. I told him that it was all right, how could he have known. And he asked if I liked chess.”

“Do you know how to play?” Dorian asked.

"Not really. I would love to learn though.”

“I’ll teach you.” Dorian and I said together, sitting forward.

“That was Cullen’s response too.” Athena chuckled softly.

“He’s not a better player, but he just may be a better teacher for you.” Dorian smirked, thinking that it was a great way to get these two together.

Cassandra ended our fun by sighing in frustration with our matchmaking, “I think it’s time to return to Haven.”

“I agree, Cassandra. Ready to go, gentlemen?” Athena stood and smiled down at us.

“We’re ready.” I answered for Dorian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those that struggle with reading. I have a link to the audio of the chapter. It’s free: https://www.patreon.com/posts/this-shit-is-1-24067321


	3. Chapter 3

The Inquisition’s ally mages were ready to attempt to close the breach. Before we left for the day, Curly stopped me, “Look after the Herald?”

I smiled at him, thinking he had a crush on Duchess too, “I always do.”

“She’s special to us too, Commander.” Dorian baldly chimed in as he walked to us, “The woman has a heart of gold.”

Cullen excused himself and walked over to Athena who was preparing her staff, “I didn’t have a chance to tell you earlier, but I had a wonderful time with you. When you get back, would you like to do it again?”

“I would enjoy that very much.” Athena smiled up at him, and got a little lost in Cullen’s warm, brown eyes. Blushing after clearing her throat and looking away, she said, “I need to go.”

“Of course. Be safe.” Cullen briefly watched her walk away, he had a bemused expression on his face, as though he didn’t quite know what to make of her.

“Ready to go?” Athena asked us.

“Yes we are, Herald.” I answered for the group.

“That can’t be her nickname.” From Dorian.

“It’s not, I’m still thinking on it.” I argued.

“We have bigger issues right now, gentlemen. Let’s move out.”

**

Athena, with the combined power of the Mage allies, fought demons and sealed the breach at the ruined Temple of Sacred Ashes. It was time to celebrate!

After all the congratulations, adorations, and worship, Athena looked like she needed a break, so Dorian and I went over to her and took her inside the Chantry to let her catch her breath.

"It's a lot to take in, isn't it?" I asked Athena after she had a chance to eat and drink.

“I understand that closing the breach is of incredible importance. I also understand that I’m the only one that had a shot at it… But I’m not Andraste, I’m not some creature of legend, I’m just me. Before all this happened, I wasn’t noticed at all except by Templars, and now, it seems as though every breath I make is noticed.”

“Tonight, at least for a while, just be you. What would you like to do?” I advised.

“Honestly?” Athena paused to let us respond, we nodded our heads, yes, “ I just want to sit and talk with my friends.”

"That, we will only be too happy to oblige.” Dorian’s smile sparkled. “Who or what shall we talk about first?”

“I did over hear Ruffles saying that Curly was very distracted today when she tried to talk to him.” I conspiratorially spoke as I poured drinks for the three of us.

“Why would he be distracted?” Athena was completely confused.

“Oh dear girl, don’t you see the way he looks at you?” Dorian was shocked by her being being lost.

“Sometimes I think I do, but most times, I wonder if it’s just wishful thinking…”

“It’s not wishful thinking. He’s a good man, but he seems to have struggles of his own. Do you think you could handle what those struggles are?” I questioned her. At this early stage, Curly was quite guarded even though I was acquaintances with him in Kirkwall. 

“There isn’t a single person here who doesn’t have struggles of their own. Despite what is thought of me, I am very far from perfect, and I have done a great many things that I regret.” Athena’s voice was firm. I smirked, thinking this is why Andraste picked you.

“Haven’t we all?” Cassandra joined us. “Everyone was wondering where the Herald had disappeared to.”

“I needed a moment.” Athena explained.

"Understood." Cassandra looked at Dorian and I suspiciously.

“Well, Seeker, care to share some of your regrets?” I love pestering Seeker.

“Not right now, no.”

Athena shook her head at me, half smiling. She knew what I was doing, "I guess I should return.”

She got up from her seat and walked over to the door. In the process, Athena almost got run over by the people coming in. Dodging the people, she made her way through the throng and out. 

"Sometimes I wonder if one of her powers is invisibility.” I remarked in wonder as we watched her avoid everyone.

“From the little she’s told me, if it is, she’s had a lot of practice.” Cassandra sounded a little sad and amazed at our Herald.

“Oh, Seeker? And what would that be?” I pried.

“I’m going to go check on her.” Dorian moved away from the table and to the door, cracking it open. He smiled slowly as he glimpsed Cullen with our esteemed Herald. “She’s fine, and I can’t wait to get the details.”

“Dorian!” Cassandra was embarrassed for the lovebirds.

“Is that why you came in here, Seeker?” I questioned, unable to contain a smirk.

“Cullen’s a grown man, he could have looked for Athena himself.” Seeker huffed.

"He certainly could have, and he would’ve blushed the entire time.” I teased.

“True...” Cassandra trailed off as Sparkler gasped.

“He took her hand! No! No! Don't let it go… I think we’re needed.” He turned around, not smiling anymore.

“This has nothing to do with…” Sparkler shook his head before I could finish, “it would be nice to have one celebration without the world getting destroyed.”

We left the chantry and went to Athena’s side and she informed us, “One of Cullen’s men came to say that there was someone approaching. He went to get a full report.” 

“So, hand holding, yes?” Dorian bluntly asked Athena.

“Dorian, is now really the time?” Cassandra inquired.

Dorian looked at her with fire in his dark eyes, and with absolute certainty, “Yes.”

“Why are you so worried about my love life or lack there of?” Athena questioned, getting Cassandra to laugh.

“Because we’re friends and friends look out for each other in all things. And you may call me hopeless for this, but life is not worth living without love, even if the world seems wont to end.”

“That’s very sweet, Dorian. Yes, he took hold of my hand.”

“Anything else?” I prodded. 

“We talked about our walk and seeing if we could do something similar tomorrow,” Athena was distracted, anxious as to what was keeping the Commander.

“Maker, what is that?!” Cassandra looked in horror at the mountain pass. At the same time, Cullen burst through the door saying that an army was coming our way.

“With what flag?” Josephine asked.

“None.” Cullen responded. As the leaders of the invading army came over the rise Cullen saw someone he recognized, “I know him, but the other one…”

“Cullen, do you have a plan?” Athena inquired.

“Haven isn’t a fortress, but we can defend it, if we use the trebuchets.” Cullen advised.

“Varric, Dorian, and Bull you’re with me.” Athena said, “we’ll go to the trebuchets and keep the enemy off of them.”

As we left, I looked back and saw Cullen watching Athena with what looked like admiration. He then glanced at me and quickly ran off with a possible pink tinge to his cheeks at being caught.

**

We fought what would later become known to us as red Templars. These Templars ingested something (in my opinion it’s a poison, but worse) called red lyrium. Lyrium is what is used to give Templars “powers” for their role in protecting mages and everyone else. Mages use lyrium to enhance their magic. Red lyrium is… Well… A lot more dangerous and a lot more powerful. Back to the battle…

We were able to get the first trebuchet to fire and keep the red Templars away from it. The second one we had to fire ourselves, and continue to fight the red Templars. We got it to fire causing an avalanche of snow on the enemy forces. The army was defeated… then a dragon flew by shooting a fire ball and destroying the trebuchet we just fired. So we high tailed it to the main gate of Haven. Once there it was decided by Cullen that our best bet would be the Chantry to at least make the dragon “fight for it.” 

On our way to the chantry we started rescuing people. We saved everyone we came across.

Right as the doors were about to close a young man walked in supporting a gravely wounded Chancellor Roderick. The young man had briefly introduced himself as Cole earlier and explained Roderick’s wound, “He took a knife from a Templar trying to save another. He will die. I have seen arch demons in the Fade and that is an arch demon.”

“The Elder One is angry because you took his mages,” Cole looked at Athena. “He wants to kill you. He does not care about the rest.”

Athena offered, “I would be willing to surrender, if it meant saving everyone.”

“He will still bury them.” Cole argued, “He does not care. I don’t like him.”

Cullen was quite perturbed by the young man, “You don’t like—“ he paused, turning his attention to Athena, “Herald, that dragon stole back any time you gave us.”

Cole looked at Chancellor Roderick and nodded his head. Chancellor Roderick spoke, “There is a path that leads out of the chantry. I took it on my summer pilgrimage.”

“If the Chancellor can show us the way, it just may work. Someone can use the remaining trebuchet. We can signal when everyone is out of harm’s way. It would bury Haven, but at least the people would be safe.” Cullen said.

“He wants me. It’s only right that I do this.” Athena informed us.

“I’m going with you.” Dorian remarked.

“No, you’re not,” Athena replied, iron in her usually soft and sweet voice.

“Yes, we are.” I assured her, standing beside Dorian.

“I can’t ask you to do this. It’s not very likely I’ll live through this.” Athena argued.

“You’re not asking, and that’s all the more reason to go.” Bull joined us.

“There’s nothing I can say or do to dissuade you from this?” Athena questioned, searching for a way to give everyone but herself a chance to live.

“You cannot take on an archdemon, army, at least what remains of it, the leader, and fire the trebuchet by yourself.” Cullen informed her, “take them with you.”

Athena looked at Cullen, her regret plain to see, “I wish…”

“I know.” Cullen briefly let his guard down with a bittersweet half smile. Quickly resuming being the Commander he advised, “Maker go with you, and if you are to have any chance to make it out of this, if we are to have a chance, make that thing hear you.”

Cullen led the people through the Chantry and up into the Frostback Mountains. While we left and fought our way to the remaining trebuchet. It was loaded, but it needed to be aimed. While aiming it, we had to fight off red Templars again. We also had to fight Knight-Captain Denam, who was no longer human. The red lyrium had turned him in to this ghastly, hulking, red beast. Through no small amount of trouble he was eventually killed and we were able to get the trebuchet aimed. Before it could be fired the arch demon came swooping through. Athena yelled, “move!”

Dorian, The Iron Bull, and I jumped away. Athena jumped toward the beast, putting herself in the line of fire. We were unable to find her, or any signs of a struggle.

“If she didn’t make it, we would be dishonoring her memory if we stayed.” Dorian softly remarked.

“Do you think…?” I trailed off, worried that if she was wounded, Duchess would need help in finding us.

“No, I don’t, but at this point, if we stayed, we would be doing more harm than good,” Bull assured us, “Let’s go.”

We left Athena to her fate. Once we caught up with everyone else, Cullen sent up the signal that everyone was safe. Almost immediately after we heard the trebuchet fire…

We set up camp to wait and see if Athena survived, and to take care of the wounded. No one spoke, a noise as soft as a nug’s squeak would startle us, and then we would all rush to the pass to see if Athena made it. Eventually Cullen started to pace and talk of organizing a search party, but Leliana would talk him out of it. You know how they always say “it’s darkest before the dawn”? Well, right before the sun broke the horizon, there was a shuffling noise heading toward camp. Cullen and Cassandra went out to investigate. I heard: 

“It’s her!” From Cullen and “thank the Maker!” From Cassandra.

Cullen carried Athena in to the infirmary tent and Cassandra went to get Mother Giselle. As Mother Giselle relieved Cullen from watching over an unconscious Herald, I asked him if Athena was all right.

"She's alive. From what I could tell, she didn’t have any serious injuries, besides almost freezing. I’m going to go see if I can find some extra blankets, want to help?”

“Definitely.” As we walked around looking for extra blankets, Curly told me about how he would relieve Solas during those first horrible days where the sky was torn open.

“I didn’t know what to think of her. It seemed almost impossible that a single person could destroy the Temple and everyone in it that way. But then…” Cullen trailed off.

“She’s a Mage.” I finished for him, almost everyone in Thedas had a major distrust of mages thanks to Blondie blowing up the Chantry in Kirkwall.

“Two years ago, I would have thought that, and there are still some times where I wonder if I can trust mages. But as I watched her sleep and wondered what type of person she was, I never got the sense that she was evil… But there was so much that was, and still is unexplained.” We gathered up the extra blankets and headed back to the infirmary.

Everyone that could fit in to the tent was surrounding Athena. “I guess she’s awake,” I quipped.

Curly half smiled and said, “We have blankets,” the sea of people parted as soon as they heard the Commander’s voice.

“Hi” Athena whispered, partially sitting up.

“Shhh, don’t speak. Rest.” Cullen covered her with the extra blankets as Athena laid back down and closed her eyes. To not disturb Athena’s rest, Cullen spoke quietly as he asked Mother Giselle to stay with her.

Mother Giselle assured him that she would. With Athena settled, I went off to find Sparkler and some drinks. As Dorian and I started drinking, we heard Curly, Ruffles, and Nightingale arguing. 

And they continued arguing… For hours.

I glanced over at the infirmary tent and saw Athena slowly walking toward them, “Great, their arguing woke her. I’m going to move closer so I can hear what she says.” 

Dorian agreed with me and followed.

Curly was the first to see Athena and he was not pleased. He interrupted Leliana with, “What are you doing?”

“Trying to figure out our best course of action.” Leliana snapped, not noticing that Athena was up and moving.

“Not you, the Herald.” Cullen responded, thinking that she barely survived certain death, found us, and now won’t even rest properly.

“Trying to get you three to stop arguing.” Athena almost whispered.

“How are you, Herald?” Josephine asked, the only one to politely inquire after Duchess’ health.

“Other than being cold, I’m fine. Thank you for asking.” Athena smiled at her. “It is more important now that we work together. I understand that you all have differing opinions on what to do and how to do it, but first, we need to find a place to rebuild.”

“We still have to find a way to defeat this Corypheus.” Leliana argued.

“And we will, but our first priority needs to be the people that are here with us that lost their homes and loved ones.” As Athena finished, Mother Giselle started singing, and we all joined in.

As we finished singing, Solas appeared and asked Athena to come with him.

When Athena came back from her talk with Solas, she told her advisors, “Solas knows of a place called Skyhold. It may take a bit to reach, but he says it has room enough for everyone, and room to grow. Leliana, can you send scouts out to find the quickest and easiest route?”

“Certainly.” Leliana left to talk to her agents.

“While waiting for Leliana’s scouts to return, what do we do?” Ruffles questioned. She always liked to be busy, sitting here and doing nothing was grating on her.

“Make sure everyone has enough blankets, food and water, check that the wounded are being cared for, offer a shoulder to cry on if needed.” Athena responded.

“Of course.” Josephine bowed a little and moved away. 

“You should be resting,” Cullen told Athena, now that they were alone.

“I’ll rest once everyone else is out of the elements and not as exposed.” Athena braced herself against the makeshift table, “I wanted…” Tears filled her violet eyes.

“Come with me,” Cullen took her to a more private location, behind a tent, “You did everything you could.” 

“Then why does it feel like I should’ve done more?” Athena choked out.

"It always does. You went in with every intention of not making it out alive, to save everyone else. That you were able to survive, and find us, are miracles.”

“What would you have done had I not found everyone here?” Athena let her curiosity get the best of her.

"I had already told Leliana and Josephine that I was going to go back to search for you. I was just about to gather a search party when you arrived. Please understand, I had to see everyone to safety first.” Cullen’s voice was soft, gentle.

“I understand and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. When we get to Skyhold, we need to do something for everyone we lost.” Athena sighed despondently.

“We will.” Cullen assured her. 

Athena sagged with relief and started crying. Without a word, Curly hugged her and held her until the sobs stopped shaking her petite body. I turned away to see Dorian behind me, the lumps we had in our throats didn’t allow us to speak.

A short while later Leliana’s scouts reported that a safe and quick passage had been found to Skyhold. We packed up and followed the Herald to our new destination. As we came over the last mountain we saw an ancient castle that had seen far better days, but it was still breathtaking seeing the grey stone that glittered with the sunset. We all breathed a sigh of relief once we were behind the safety of Skyhold’s stone walls.


	4. Chapter 4

At daybreak, Seeker and Nightingale officially bestowed the title of “Inquisitor” on Athena, which she accepted. 

Now that we knew who the enemy was, I felt that it was time for me to confess. So I went to the new Inquisitor and told her that there was someone I wanted her to meet. I didn’t say who, because much like Athena at first, I was a prisoner because I happen to be friends with the Champion of Kirkwall. 

Hawke wanted to help, especially since it was her old nemesis. Needless to say Cassandra wasn’t happy that I kept Hawke’s location from her. Athena intervened saying that there was no reason to second guess the past, and that Hawke is here now to help, and that’s all that matters. After the craziness of the day, Athena and I played a game of Wicked Grace.

“I understand where Cassandra is coming from, but between you and me, I’m glad you kept Hawke apart from this until now.” Athena opened up.

“You’re glad?” I asked her, stunned.

“Yes. We didn’t know who we were dealing with. It also shows that you’re not willing to put your friends in harm’s way unnecessarily, and after all this is done, maybe I can actually live a life.”

"You have my loyalty, Inquisitor, and my friendship.” I promised her, amazed.

“No, don’t you dare call me that. Athena is just fine, and maybe, coming from you, Duchess would be all right as well.” I smiled at her answer and dealt the cards.

I would catch Cullen and Athena smiling shyly at each other and blushing every time they happened to glance each other’s way. As Cullen was organizing the forces for Skyhold, Athena approached him to talk. She asked him how Skyhold was doing.   
Cullen explained that everything should be running smoothly within the week, and that “Morale has improved greatly since you accepted the role of Inquisitor.”

“Inquisitor Trevelyan… It sounds odd, don’t you think?” She questioned, uncertain, still adjusting to the new title and role.

“Not at all. We needed a leader, you have proven yourself.” Cullen answered.

“Thank you, Cullen,” Athena awkwardly paused, Sparkler and I looked at each other, wondering if the lovebirds needed help, and then Athena hesitatingly spoke, “I’m glad that you… That so many made it out of Haven.”

“As am I,” Cullen paused and it looked as though he reached for her hand and thought better of it, “You stayed behind… You could have… I will not allow the events at Haven to happen again. You have my word.”

Athena thanked him again and started to walk away… Sparkler and I were motioning emphatically to Curly to ask her to go for a walk. He briefly shook his head at us and then noticed Athena slowly walking away from him, “Inquisitor…”

“Athena, please?” She turned back to look at the blonde man.

Clearing his throat and blushing, he said, “Of course. Would you care to inspect Skyhold… With me?”

“I would like that,” Athena’s smile rivaled the sun. As they were walking out of ear shot, I heard Athena ask, “Did you leave anyone behind in Kirkwall?”

“No, I fear I made few friends there, and my family is in Fereldan.”

“No one special caught your interest?” I was unable to see Athena’s face, but I’m sure her cheeks were quite rosy.

“Not in Kirkwall,” Curly responded, sounding a bit smug.

Dorian and I had the biggest grins as we went to the tavern for drinks.

**

Despite her new role, Athena was quite frequently able to join me for dinner. I, of course, had to tease her a bit on how easily she could get Curly to blush, “He blushes when he looks at you.”

“Who?” If she was already confused, this talk was not going to go well for her.

“Curly,” I chuckled.

“Varric!” She hid her face in her hands.

“Just because you’re hiding your face doesn’t mean that the blush isn’t there.” As I finished talking a messenger came up to Athena and whispered to her.

“I’m sorry, Varric, but I’m needed,” Athena stood, barely touching her dinner.

“If it’s not the Commander, he and I are going to have a little chat,” I warned.

Athena blushed as she shook her head and left without saying another word. When she entered Cullen’s office she noticed that he looked tired, “You sent a messenger for me?”

“Yes… As you know, templars use lyrium. While I have secured a reliable source of lyrium for our Templars… I… No longer take it. I have asked Cassandra to watch me and if I can no longer perform my duties, she will recommend a replacement for me.” Cullen explained.

“Are you in pain?” Athena asked, worried for him.

“I can endure it,” Cullen responded softly, somewhat surprised that Duchess was asking after his well being.

“When the Templars in my circle would stop taking lyrium, some would go mad, and a couple of them died... When did you stop?” Athena was still concerned for him.

“It’s been months now, and it hasn’t killed me yet,” Cullen half heartedly smiled.

“I only ask because I… Well I…” Athena stopped and blushed, not ready for that discussion yet, “I respect your decision.”

“Thank you. Please know that the Inquisition will not be compromised.” Cullen replied, wondering at what she was going to say. They awkwardly said goodbye. 

The next day we left to save the town of Crestwood from the undead, bandits, and to meet Hawke’s warden friend.   
On the way there, I had to ask, “What did you and Curly talk about last night?”

“Did they have a date?” Sparkler asked hopefully.

“No. And if you need to know that bad, you can ask Cullen yourself,” Athena kicked her horse to ride ahead of us.

“Oooh, she’s getting protective!” Dorian was giddy.

“Should we start placing bets on who makes the first move? Two to one odds that Athena does,” I chuckled.

“I’ll take that bet.” (And thus begins Sparkler’s long history of betting against Duchess.)


	5. Chapter 5

We followed Hawke and Warden Stroud to the barren land of the Western Approach. This was where we found out that the Grey Wardens were turning their warriors in to demons, and that the mage wardens were slaves to Corypheus. Hawke was not pleased with the turn of events…

“When are you going to Adamant?” Hawke questioned as she caught Curly coming in from training Inquisition soldiers.

“As soon as we are able to,” Cullen understood Hawke’s impatience.

“And when will that be?”

“The Inquisitor just got back from fixing the Western Approach’s issues this morning. Even you couldn’t be on the move all the time. She knows it’s a priority, give her a day to rest,” Cullen responded, not really stopping as he kept walking to his office, forcing Hawke to keep up with him.

“Says the one I have yet to see take anything resembling a break, or a rest,” Athena gently teased, stopping them right before they reached the battlements (I really wish I had been there for that.)

“I am sorry, I’m anxious to stop Corypheus… Again. Inquisitor,” Hawke acknowledged her by a nod and left to pace the battlements.

“The reason you haven’t seen me take a break is because you’re rarely here,” Cullen teased back, pleasantly surprised and smirking.

Athena blushed and Sparkler decided to join the conversation, “Did you need rescuing, Commander?”

Cullen shook his head at Dorian, and then said to Athena, “I am sorry, but I must get back to work.”

Athena nodded in understanding, blushing the entire time and waited until Curly was out of ear shot, “Dorian!”

“What?” As Duchess’ blush deepened, realization dawned on Sparkler, “Were you flirting?” The only response he got was an even brighter blush, “Oh dear girl, had I realized... I am sorry.”

Athena shrugged, “It doesn’t matter.”

“It most certainly does. Drinks are on me tonight,” and they walked to the tavern where Dorian bought, all night. I wouldn’t let him live it down.

**

The next morning, Leliana and Cullen were playing chess in the garden as Athena walked up to them. She was amused with catching Cullen taking a break, “Having fun?”

“Inquisitor!” Cullen started to stand, embarrassed that he was taking a break.

“If you leave, I will consider it a forfeit,” Leliana reminded him.

“Please don’t stop on my account. I may learn something,” Athena replied as she crossed her arms, intrigued.

“Good. You can witness my victory,” Leliana replied as she moved her piece, confident in her chess skills.

“She’s upset because I won our last game,” Cullen returned to his seat and took his turn.

“That was luck, you cannot rely on it.”

“Luck had nothing to do with it. I have you in three because I’m good at this,” Cullen smirked. 

They played quietly, until Cullen announced that it was his game. Leliana responded with, “Well played. I expect a rematch,” and returned to her duties.

“I should return to my duties as well… Unless you would care for a game?” Cullen hoped that she would say yes.

“Prepare the board, Commander,” Athena answered. (Sparkler and I taught her how to play.)

Cullen let her play for a couple minutes and then had to ask, because her moves were confounding him, “Who taught you how to play?”

“Varric and Dorian,” Athena blushed, embarrassed to admit that even after their first outing, she still knew nothing about chess.

“I’m going to reset the board. If it’s all right with you, I would like to teach you how to play,” Curly requested.

“I take it everything I was doing was wrong?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “I would say terribly misinformed.”

“That bad?” 

Cullen smiled and wisely changed the subject, “My sister and I used to play. She would get this stuck up look on her face every time she won. Which was all the time. My brother and I practiced for weeks… The look on her face when I finally won… between the Templars and the Inquisition, I haven’t seen her in years. I wonder if she still plays.”

“You have siblings?” Athena was grateful for the reprieve.

“Two sisters and a brother.”

“Where are they now?” 

“They moved to South Reach after the Blight. I do not write to them as often as I should,” Cullen started to teach Athena how to play chess. As the lesson was coming to a close Cullen said, “I believe this is the longest we’ve gone without discussing the Inquisition or related matters. I appreciate the distraction.”

“We should spend more time together,” Athena softly murmured.

“I would like that.”

“Me too.”

“You said that,” Curly smiled as Athena blushed. They parted ways with an agreement to continue Duchess’s chess lessons.

**

For the next couple weeks Athena used the excuse of chess lessons to avoid Sparkler and I when we were at Skyhold. I finally confronted her about it, “I thought we taught you how to play chess?”

“I found a better teacher,” Athena smirked, keeping secrets from us.

Dorian gasped, “You’re smirking! When did you learn to smirk?!”

Athena chuckled, “I have to go.” And left us dumbfounded as she went to meet with Curly.

Curly’s office was sparsely furnished with a large and sturdy desk and a couple chairs. It had several bookshelves filled with books. Our Curly’s a well read man (now if only Duchess could convince him to read my stories.) 

Athena opened the large wooden door and peeked in. Seeing only Curly, she walked in. Of course, someone followed her. Athena waited patiently while they talked of commandery issues. When the agent left, Duchess nervously asked, “Could we talk… Alone?” (At times, Curly’s office resembled a very busy marketplace with people constantly coming and going.)

“Alone? I mean, Of course,” Cullen indicated that they should walk the battlements. Once they were out of his office, with a bright sun shining down on them, he murmured with a nervous laugh, “It’s a nice day.”

Athena had been lost deep in thought and didn’t hear him, “I’m sorry?”

“It’s… There was something you wished to discuss?” Cullen asked as they stopped walking. Worried as to where this might lead.

“Cullen, I care for you and I…” Athena trailed off with a frustrated sigh.

“What’s wrong?”

“You left the Templars, but do you trust mages? Could you think of me as anything more?” Athena’s voice was tinged with worry, afraid she had fallen for a man that could never trust her because of her powers. 

“I could… I mean, I do think of you and what I might say in this sort of situation…” Cullen rubbed his neck, a thousand things running through his mind at once.

“What’s stopping you?” 

“You’re the Inquisitor. We’re at war. And you… I didn’t think it was possible,” Cullen said softly.

“And yet I’m still here,” Athena responded, just as softly.

“So you are… It seems too much to ask but I want to-“ Cullen moved in to kiss her when he was rudely interrupted by one of his soldiers.

“Commander you wanted Leliana’s report delivered without delay,” the soldier said.

“What?!” Cullen was very irritated at being interrupted.

“Leliana’s report. You wanted it without delay,” the soldier stopped as he saw Athena looking away and blushing. Cullen approached him, ready to kill, “or to your office…”

Cullen turned around to Athena after the soldier left. Athena responded, “If you have to go-“ she was interrupted with a toe curling kiss.

“I’m sorry… That was… nice,” Cullen said softly.

“There’s no need to be sorry, that was what I wanted,” Athena smiled.

“Oh. Good,” he kissed her again.

“Com...mander?” One of Cullen’s people interrupted again. 

Cullen growled but ignored the soldier for now, “When are you leaving?”

“Sunrise,” Athena breathlessly responded.

“So… You have the day then?” Cullen asked softly, not wanting to let her go now that he knew the feelings were mutual.

“I do.”

“Would you like to eat dinner with me?”

“Yes,” Athena smiled as they parted ways. She heard as she left…

“Was that…?” From the soldier.

“Was that what?” Curly growled, still perturbed over the first interruption. He would have liked their first kiss to be theirs for more than a minute.

**

The next time I saw Duchess she looked as though she was floating. Tiny, Sparkler, and I looked at each other, wondering who made the first move… It didn’t take long to find out as whispers of “did you see the Commander kissing the Inquisitor?” “I thought there were rules against Templars and mages kissing…” 

“Pay up, Varric,” Sparkler crowed.

“We don’t know anything except what the gossip mill is saying,” I replied.

“Do you really think the Boss would have made the first move?” Tiny asked.

“I gave her some pointers,” Sparkler puffed out his chest proudly.

“You bet against her!” I reminded Dorian.

“My words to our Commander had fallen on deaf ears… I had to do something.”

Athena came out of Ruffles’ office with her advisors. Josephine and Leliana went their separate ways. Curly seemed unsure if he wanted to wait for Athena as I had called her over, “Duchess, we’ve been hearing things…”

“Of a certain Commander kissing a certain Inquisitor,” Sparkler chimed in.

“Or the Boss kissing Cullen,” Bull challenged.

Athena shook her head, “This is what you called me over here for?” 

“We need the truth,” I smiled my most gentlemanly smile.

“Are you making bets out of my love life?!” Athena asked, incredulous.

“I was betting that Curly wouldn’t make the first move,” I answered.

“Unbelievable…” Athena shook her head again as she walked to where Cullen was pacing by the door.

“Aww, come on, Duchess!” I called after her.

“Duchess?” Cullen questioned as they left the great hall.

“Varric’s nickname for me,” Athena explained, trying to forget her irritation with me, Sparkler, and Tiny.

Curly shook his head in disbelief as they walked to his office to have a dinner for two, “I thought ‘Curly’ was bad.”

“At least this time I get ‘Duchessed’ with love,” She murmured, half smiling.

“You’ve had that nickname before?” Cullen pulled out a chair for her.

“Unfortunately,” Athena looked away for a moment not wanting to discuss a painful part of her past on their first official date, and then asked, “Why did you join the Templars?”

“I could think of no better calling than to protect those in need. I used to beg the templars at the chantry to teach me. They must have saw some promise, or at least a willingness to learn. They spoke with my parents and once my parents realized how much it meant to me, I joined. I was thirteen. How old were you…” Cullen trailed off, wondering how to broach the subject gently. He knew all too well how some mages ended up at the circle.

“I was taken to the circle when I was seven…” Athena’s voice grew faint as she got lost in her past. Shaking off the memories she changed the subject, “Varric has given me the distinct impression that you do not like sea travel.”

“I don’t. The constant rocking of the ship… The confinement… I am quite content to travel by land. You had to make the same journey, how did you fare?” Cullen quickly changed the subject back to her, thinking he would lose Athena if she knew what he had thought of mages.

“I spent the majority of the time in my cabin,” Athena answered as they started eating.

“Were you ill?” Cullen couldn’t imagine any other reason to desire staying in such a small space willingly.

“The first couple days, but after that it was just safer for me to stay hidden. The captain’s son had taken a liking to me.”

“You had issues with the Captain’s son?” Curly wondered what caused Athena not to trust this person.

“He was cruel to everyone around him. Except for those he was attracted to… They didn’t know about my abilities, and I didn’t want anyone finding out.”

Cullen nodded, understanding the unspoken words hanging between them all too well. Had something happened where Athena had to use her powers, it was incredibly likely she wouldn’t have survived the voyage.

They ate quietly for a bit… At least until Duchess’ curiosity got the better of her, “When you kissed me… How long had you wanted to do that?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “Longer than I should admit.” He paused, “if I seem uncertain it is because it’s been a long time since I’ve wanted anyone in my life. I didn’t think I would find that here… Or you.” Cullen noticed that Athena put down her fork, “Are you finished?”

“I am.”

“Would you like to go for a walk?” Curly stood and offered her his hand.

“I would love to,” Athena accepted, “the Inquisitor and Commander of the Inquisition… That will have people talking…”

“You would not believe how quickly gossip spreads through the barracks,” Cullen almost groaned.

“Does it bother you?” Duchess looked deep in to his brown eyes.

“I would rather my… Our… Private affairs stayed that way. But if there was nothing to talk about, I would regret it more.” Cullen answered softly as they stopped to kiss.

They walked the entire battlements, stopping every so often to kiss. As they turned around to head back, they heard a Templar arguing with a mage about the mage potentially turning in to a demon. Cullen shook his head and Athena chuckled softly, which surprised Curly, “You find their argument funny?”

“Not funny… I think it’s kind of a silly argument to have,” Athena remarked.

“You don’t worry about possession?”

“Not really… The anchor is proof that anything can happen, but… Before, no. Do you worry…” Athena trailed off, not sure if she wanted an answer considering he was once a Templar.

“I’d rather not think about it,” Cullen said quickly, but he was still curious as to why Athena didn’t worry about it, “why don’t you worry about it?”

“The few times I tried to use lyrium to enhance my powers, I got deathly ill from the stuff so I don’t use it. I could be wrong, but I think lyrium weakens one’s mental state or their will and it opens them to possession or manipulation,” Athena explained.

"If you don’t use lyrium, what do you use?” Cullen was worried about what she did use to enhance her powers. He had not seen her use blood magic, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t one.

“I have no need to enhance my powers. I like my abilities as they are,” Athena looked down at her left hand and the glowing green anchor, “there are some abilities that I wish I could share.”

Cullen covered her hand with his and gently kissed her.


	6. Chapter 6

We met up with the Inquisition forces half way to Adamant Fortress. Since they started spending time together romantically, duties aside, Curly and Duchess were almost inseparable when Athena was at Skyhold. However, on the trip to Adamant, they seemed to be avoiding each other. While Bull and Cullen were sparring, Sparkler and I interrogated Athena….

“Did something happen between you and Curly?” I asked after we set up our tents.

“No, why?” Athena wrapped herself in a blanket (she was always cold.)

“Because you two are avoiding each other like the plague,” Dorian chimed in.

“We are not avoiding each other… There’s a huge battle waiting for us at Adamant and we need to focus on that,” Athena winced as she heard a loud oof from the sparring combatants.

“Is that really the story?” I prodded because I noticed a slight blush staining our fearless leader’s cheeks.

“Yes!” The blush got brighter.

“Why are you embarrassed? We all know that you two have been spending time together,” Sparkler’s brown eyes got wide, realization dawning on him, “You aren’t sure how to approach him out here, are you?”

Athena growled and stalked off. Her growl caught Curly’s attention and as he was distracted by the vision of Duchess walking into the barely there sunset, where she was the only color on a deserted and barren landscape, he got blindsided by Tiny. Bull chuckled when he saw what… Who distracted the Commander, “Tonight she doesn’t have anywhere to hide.”

“She hides?” Cullen found that odd as Bull helped him up.

“Hiding may not be the right word, but she gets uneasy when Dorian and Varric start asking about you, she’ll usually excuse herself by saying that she’s tired or wants to read… When they get really bad, she’ll go for a walk,” Tiny explained.

Cullen raised an eyebrow at him, suspicious of my and Dorian’s interest in him, “Why are they asking about me?”

Tiny laughed, “Because they’re mother hens.” And came over to join us.

As Curly passed us he gave us a very stern look and followed Duchess. He found her at the edge of camp, as far away from everyone as she could safely get and she was pacing. Cullen asked gently, “Are you all right?”

Athena jumped as she didn’t hear him approach, she blushed, “I’m feeling a bit like a caged animal.”

Cullen chuckled, “You’re not used to traveling with so many?”

“No… Until all of this,” Athena waved her left hand which glowed green because of the anchor, “I had mostly traveled by myself.”

“You were allowed to roam freely from the circle?” Cullen inquired as they walked the perimeter of our large camp.

“Depends on what it was…but those trips were no longer than a day or two at most…. I was thinking more of being taken to the circle and traveling to the conclave,” Athena answered shyly.

“You were a small child when you were taken to the circle, you couldn’t have traveled there by yourself.”

“My parents hired a coach for me to go to the circle in. I had my books and clothes on the journey there… The driver dropped me off at the gate, and I went in by myself,” She noticed that their hands were brushing together, but uncertain if she should take hold of his hand.

As Athena told her story Cullen’s expression grew very dark and he almost growled, “What your parents did to you was wrong.”

Athena shrugged her shoulders, not very keen on talking about a painful past, she changed the subject, “When you and Bull spar… Is it always so… painful?”

“Painful?” He was confused.

“It sounded as though the both of you were trying to break each other.”

Cullen chuckled and finally took hold of Duchess’ hand, “That’s how a sparring match usually sounds when the combatants are similar in ability.”

Athena blushed at the hand holding. Confused, she continued her train of thought, “It doesn’t sound that way when Bull and Dorian spar.” 

“Dorian spars?” Cullen asked, incredulous.

“To me it sounds more like complaining. But, Bull seems okay with it.”

Cullen stopped walking and pulled Athena close to him, pushing Athena’s long, dark hair behind her shoulder. He blushed and murmured, “You look lovely tonight.”

“Dust covered women in scratched armor are attractive to you?” Athena gently teased.

“Only you,” He whispered and kissed her as the moonlight smiled down on them.

Sparkler, Tiny, and I walked by the kissing couple as we made our way to our tents. Of course, we couldn’t go by without making our presence known. I whistled, Dorian applauded and Bull loudly chastised us, “Leave the Commander and the Boss alone!”

Cullen growled in response and Athena chuckled a little nervously. Cullen asked, “Did Varric and Dorian have anything to do with you seeking your own company?”

“A little. I should be used to their incessant teasing and questions by now,” She blushed.

“Why don’t you tell them to mind their own business?” Cullen was still miffed about us drawing attention to their kiss.

“I know they ask because they care about me. I’m not very good company right before a battle… Or ever really,” Athena blushed more.

“I enjoy your company,” Cullen softly assured her as they continued their walk, slowly making their way to their tents.

“I enjoy yours, too,” Athena paused, “thank you for talking to me tonight.”

“You’re welcome…” Cullen paused, thinking it odd that she would have a low opinion of herself, “Why would you think that you’re unpleasant company?” 

“Varric says that, at times, to get me to talk is like pulling teeth. I’ve never really had anyone interested in spending time with me… And now to have so many desiring my thoughts, I’m not sure how to react to it all,” Athena answered as they stopped outside her tent.

Cullen smiled at her, “I should let you get some rest.”

Athena returned the smile, “You need to rest too.”

There was an awkward pause and then Curly growled low at his weakness for Duchess and kissed her. Athena went to sleep smiling and Cullen went on the night watch thinking of what an amazing woman he had the honor of kissing.

**

The next night, Athena couldn’t sleep, and left her tent to go for a walk. Curly was just coming off the night watch and was surprised to see her, “Athena?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Duchess blushed.

“Was there a reason you couldn’t sleep?” Cullen was concerned for her. Sleep for him was touch and go at the best of times, but he was under no illusions that others slept like him.

“She never does,” I griped, not able to sleep either.

“I was asking the Inquisitor,” Curly reprimanded me, not happy that I interrupted them.

“I usually don’t get much sleep on the road. Varric, you normally don’t wake up,” Athena said.

“I made the mistake of setting my tent up next to Tiny’s,” I complained, grumpy because I happen to enjoy sleep.

“Do you desire company?” Cullen asked Duchess, ignoring me.

“Thank you, but I don’t want to keep you from your rest. I’ll be fine,” She smiled a smile to rival the sun.

“If you’re certain.”

“I am,” Athena responded, a bit breathless as Cullen had moved closer to her and bent down to kiss her.

When the kiss ended, I promised, “I’ll keep her company, Curly. It’s not as though I can go back to sleep with Tiny’s snores trying to wake half the camp.”

Athena smiled up at the tall, blonde man and whispered, “Good night.”

Cullen smiled in return and left. I chuckled, “You two are so adorable, it’s sickening.”

“I never said I was spending time with you,” Duchess smiled wickedly, “Your interrogations are worse than Cassandra’s.”

I gasped, “You’re teasing me! Heralds of Andraste aren’t supposed to tease!”

“How many Heralds of Andraste do you know?” Athena chuckled, letting down her guard. 

“Only you,” I chuckled, and then we both laughed as we heard Curly chuckling.

**

We reached Adamant Fortress and stopped Corypheus’ mind control of the Grey Wardens. Athena admitted to me that she had a soft spot for the Wardens because when she was younger she would read everything she could on the hero of Fereldan. So an archdemon, blood magic, and a trip through the Fade later, the Wardens joined the Inquisition as allies, and Hawke went to Weisshaupt, and then home to Anders.


	7. Chapter 7

When we got back to Skyhold, Cassandra and Cullen had a meeting. The lyrium withdrawal had gotten pretty bad and during the meeting Cullen asked Cassandra to find a replacement for him as Commander. 

Athena was informed of the meeting and came in at the end, or her appearance ended it faster. Cullen walked by her, murmured, “Forgive me,” and left.

Athena got the story from Cassandra. After talking with her and agreeing that what Curly was doing was admirable, Athena sought out Cullen. As she opened the door, Cullen threw the case that had the lyrium draughts in it, narrowly missing her. Cullen apologized, “I didn’t hear you enter.”

“Cullen, talk to me.” Athena implored, worried about how much pain he seemed to be in.

“When I was at the Fereldan Circle, there were abominations, demons, I was tortured and nearly lost my mind. Even after all of that I still felt the need to serve, so I was sent to Kirkwall. Because of what happened before I was angry and couldn’t trust mages, so I trusted my Knight Commander that the mages were being treated reasonably well. Only to find out too late what horrors she committed. Do you understand why I want no part of that life anymore?”

“I do, and you stood against her in the end.” Athena moved closer to him.

“I should have investigated it sooner. I thought I could atone for my past as part of the Inquisition, but I swore I would not give less to the Inquisition than I gave the Chantry... I should be taking it.” Cullen punched the bookcase.

“I think it’s admirable that you have given up taking lyrium. Cullen, I care about you, is taking lyrium what you want to do?”

“…No.” Cullen replied softly, amazed that she was so concerned for his well being.

“Then don’t take it. You’ve seen me at my weakest and lowest…” Athena stopped, thinking this was the wrong tact.

"Thank you. If your weakest and lowest is mourning those we lost…” Cullen was thinking their lowest didn’t compare.

“Solas told me that it was you who relieved him while I was unconscious in Haven.” Athena confessed, motioning that they should sit. 

Cullen nodded his head and followed her. “When did he tell you that?”

“Right after we got to Skyhold. I went to talk to him and somehow we ended up in a dream in Haven, and that’s when he told me of my first days in Haven and how I wouldn’t wake up.”

“Has anything like that happened to you before?” 

“No, but then a lot of things have happened since the Conclave that I don’t understand. Before the Inquisition my family refused to acknowledge my existence and because I was different, I got locked away in a tower. Now, they’re falling over themselves to get back in to my life and I don’t understand it.” Athena shook her head, confounded.

“Even your parents?” 

"That’s all I have. When I was young I had a crush on a Templar. When he left I wrote my parents to see if I could transfer to a different circle, the circle he was at. I was never brave enough to talk to him, but he was one of a handful of people to treat me like I was actually a person instead of something to be reviled. But they refused. When the circles fell, I wrote daily to them, but I never heard back. I left. Now poor Josephine gets several messages a day about how they want to talk to me and want to forgive me.”

“Forgive you? For what?” Cullen was trying hard to not show his anger on her behalf.

“For being a Mage, I guess. Sometimes I think one of my transgressions is that I care too much. I was never able to be cold or distant with anyone unless they gave me a reason to not trust them.” Athena winced, talking about her past never gets easier.

“Do you want to talk with them?”

“Yes and no; I miss them. I would love to know if I have any siblings, but I don’t think it’s fair that they judge me and find me lacking. And with everything else that’s going on, I just don’t want to deal with it.” Athena sighed and looked at Cullen. “I’m sorry, I wanted to cheer you up and take your mind off of things, and all I did was talk about me.”

"You have nothing to be sorry for. It may not have necessarily been a happy topic, but you did succeed,” Cullen paused for a second, “If it’s all right with you, I would like to meet with your parents. I’ll go through Josephine, but it’s my job to try to keep you safe from any potential harm, and more than that, I want to.” 

“My brave Commander, you have my blessing. Thank you.” Athena smiled at him.

"As much as I don't want this night to end..." Curly trailed off.

“I know. Are you going to be all right?”

“Yes, go get some sleep.” Cullen gently ordered. 

Athena got up and went to the door, she paused for a second and looked back. Cullen walked over to her and kissed her, whispering goodbye to each other they parted ways.

**

The next morning Athena saw Cullen standing out on the battlements, letting the wind ruffle his short blonde hair, and play with the fur lining of his armor. Athena stood beside him, “Feeling better, I trust?”

“I am. Thank you.”

“Is it always that bad?” 

“The pain comes and goes. Sometimes I feel as if I am back there… I should not have pushed myself so far yesterday.”

“I’m just glad that you’re all right,” Athena smiled, glad to hear that Cullen was feeling better.

“I am. I never truly told anyone what happened at the circle tower. I was… Not myself after that. For years that anger blinded me. I’m not proud of the man that made me. The way I felt about mages… I wasn’t sure if I would care about you and the thought of that... sickens me. Now I can put some distance between myself and everything that happened. It’s a start,” Cullen's guilt laid bare.

“For what it’s worth, I like who you are now,” Athena offered, looking in to Curly’s guilt ridden, brown eyes.

“Even after…?” Curly hesitated, wondering if he should press the matter.

“Cullen, I care about you. You’ve done nothing to change that,” Athena assured him.

Cullen was amazed and grateful that Athena’s opinion of him hadn’t changed, “What about you? You have troubles of your own. How are you holding up?”

Athena wearily sighed, “Honestly, I’m terrified. There’s so many people depending on us… On me. Corypheus is still out there.”

“We have made great strides. Do not doubt yourself, or the Inquisition, just yet. If there is anything I can do, you only have to ask.” Cullen reassured her and bent down to kiss her.

After Athena left to close rifts. Cullen found Ruffles in her office, “Josephine, can you invite Athena’s parents here?”

“I didn’t realize things were that serious between you two.” Josephine was quite surprised by his request.

"They’re… Um… Not, at least, not yet,” Curly blushed, “I care for her and from what she’s told me, her family has been anything but kind, and I want to find out why.”

“I will do my best to get them here as soon as possible, Commander.” Josephine said trying her hardest not to smile. After Cullen left, she burst in to laughter.

"What's so funny, Josie?" Leliana came in to have a meeting with her.

“Oh, um, nothing… No, I can’t, I have to tell you.” Ruffles paused to catch her breath, “Cullen asked me to bring Athena’s parents here.”

“Well, that didn’t take long…” Nightingale was surprised at how fast things were moving.

“He said it’s not serious yet… And that it’s because her parents were unkind to her, but to care about her past that much…” Josephine knowingly smiled.

“I know her family didn’t have much contact with her while she was at Ostwick, and when someone brings up family she gets uncomfortable. Hmm… Maybe I should do a little digging…” Leliana thought out loud.

“Will you let me know what you find out?” 

“Of course.”

**

Josephine was able to get Athena’s parents to Skyhold quickly. The day they were to arrive, Nightingale came through with information as to why things were tense between Athena and her parents. Leliana delivered it to the Commander. “You should read this before meeting her parents.”

“How?... Never mind.” Curly could guess as to how she found out. He took the report from Leliana and as he read it, his expression darkened. When he finished reading it, he sighed, “Maybe I shouldn’t meet with them.” 

"Maybe they want to make amends?” Leliana half heartedly offered.

Cullen thought for a while, “Maybe... Is Athena here?”

“You don’t know?” Leliana smiled, knowing all too well how inseparable our lovers had become.

“No. We... Ah... Haven’t had the chance to talk yet today.” Cullen blushed.

“I’ll make sure she’s distracted.” Leliana paused and then encouraged him, “You’re doing a good thing, Commander. Athena’s a very sweet woman and you both deserve to have someone care for you.”

“Tell me that after I don’t kill her parents.” Curly grumbled and Leliana laughed.

“Where are you having the meeting so we can avoid the area?”

“Outside the gates,” Curly responded with wishful thinking, he sighed, “I suppose I should bring them in here.”  
“We’ll be in the garden.” 

Athena was talking to Vivienne and Sera when Leliana came to find her, “Inquisitor, can I borrow you?”

“What do you need Leliana?” Athena asked.

“It’s best discussed in the garden.” Out in the garden, Leliana began, “I haven’t been to the garden since we first came to Skyhold. It is very peaceful.”

“It is. I prefer the battlements myself.”

“Oh?” Leliana thought she knew the reason Athena preferred the battlements.

“Cullen isn’t the only reason I go up there. I love feeling the wind whipping around me. There’s a tower that hasn’t been restored yet, and when I really need to get away, I go up there. It serves as a reminder that I am just a small part in this world.” Athena explained.

“I understand. I haven’t had the chance to thank you for the nug yet, he quite enjoys being with the other ones I have.”

"You’re welcome, I’m glad he’s found a happy home.” Athena said as they sat on a bench in the gazebo.

“Do you like animals?” 

“I adore them. Before my powers revealed themselves and I was sent to the circle, I would always bring home the strays. My parents would throw a fit, after a while they all ran away, except one and she died... I haven’t had a pet since.” Athena looked off in the distance as the bitter memory played anew in her mind.

“Once all of this is done, You should get one.” Leliana encouraged her.

“I don’t know… We’ll see.” Athena thought, if we survive, and abruptly changed the subject. “You know the Hero of Fereldan right? Can you tell me about her?”

“We fought the blight together, and she fell in love with Alistair. Poor Alistair didn’t know what to do with the attention Selene showed him. I had never seen two people more in love or happy. We lost touch after Divine Justinia died, and I asked Alistair, but all he’ll tell me is that she is on a quest. If it’s okay with you, I’d like to see if I can find her.”

“Oh, please do. She was a hero of mine while I was in the circle… She still is, and if she’s in harm’s way we need to provide assistance.” Athena readily agreed with Nightingale.

“She’s a good hero to have. If, when, we succeed, where will you go?” Leliana gently pried.

“I honestly don’t know. I can’t go back to my family, their silence for all those years made that clear. I was hoping to make Skyhold my home, but if Cullen isn’t happy here…”

“You would follow him to the ends of the world.” Leliana finished for her.

“I would, in a heartbeat. It’s all incredibly odd, isn’t it? Here we are facing this monster, possibly the destruction of Thedas, if not the world, and here I am mooning over someone.” Athena shook her head at herself, disbelieving what she was doing.

Leliana laughed, “You’re not the only one, and it sounds as though there’s a lot more there than a simple crush. Do you love him?”

"What would you think if I said yes?" Athena questioned her, feeling a bit nervous about, oh, everything.

“I’d be happy for you.”

“When I’m with him I feel like the rest of the world falls away and it’s just us. I feel safe and protected whenever I think of him. He makes me feel like I can save the world.” Athena paused, “Now if only I could stop the doubts about myself.”

“What do you mean?” Leliana asked.

"I'm a mage. Most of my life I have been taught that I am less than nothing, a thing to be feared, and that I don’t deserve happiness or any semblance of a normal life because of my abilities. When my past comes crashing down on me I’m left wondering what he sees in me.” As Athena spoke, Leliana looked up and saw Cullen standing to the side, within earshot, but not so close as to be noticed.

“You are an amazing woman, Athena, never doubt that. I must get back to work, but I would love to talk with you more.” Leliana smiled at the young woman.

“I would like that. He’s right behind me isn’t he?” 

“Yes. Commander, you would make a good spy. I hope you two have a good day.” Leliana laughed and went back into the keep.

“How long have you been standing there?” Athena blushed thinking he had heard her declaration of love.

Cullen laughed, a deep, husky laugh, “Long enough. It’s about time that I got to see you blush.”

Athena blushed more, to get him back for making her blush, she said, “I know why Leliana brought me out here.”

"You do?" Cullen was shocked by this as he thought he had been discreet, "How?” 

“I was on the battlements when I saw my family’s banner coming up the pass. I would have hid there too, if I hadn't been needed in the main hall."

Cullen laughed out right, “Would you like to get out of the garden?”

Athena nodded and Cullen took her by the hand, for once, not caring who saw them together. They walked, hand in hand, up to the battlements and his office.

When they reached privacy Athena laughed, “Do you realize how many people we passed walking up here?”

"It doesn't bother you, does it?” Curly was still concerned at how it might affect what they were trying to accomplish with the Inquisition. He did not want to diminish Athena in any way.

“Absolutely not. I can’t wait to see everyone’s reactions.” Athena assured him. Cullen smiled in response as Duchess’ nervous curiosity got the best of her, she asked, “So… What did you hear when Leliana and I were talking?”

Cullen ignored her question and asked one of his own, “Have dinner with me?”

“What?” Athena was not expecting to be answered with a question.

“Have dinner with me?” Curly repeated.

“Avoiding my question are you? I would love to have dinner with you.”

Cullen smiled in response, “We can talk about everything after dinner.”

“I’m starting to think Leliana was right.” Athena smiled at him.

“How so?” Cullen didn’t know what she was referring to, momentarily forgetting Nightingale’s parting shot.

“You’d make an excellent spy.” They parted ways with a kiss and a promise to later meet at the tavern.


	8. Chapter 8

As we neared the tavern, it was quiet…too quiet. Sparkler and I looked at each other, worried, because the tavern was usually boisterous. Dorian cautiously opened the door. We entered and saw everyone taking quick glances (some were out right staring,) at the back corner table. And there we saw the Commander with the Inquisitor. Sparkler and I made our way to the bar, once we got our drinks we saluted the table in the back corner. Athena saw us, smiled, and returned to gazing at her companion.

“It appears that we’re causing quite a scene.” Athena shyly commented.

“Yes, it appears we are.” Curly smiled at her, “Have you had your fill?”

“I have,” Athena responded, “Should we…?”

Cullen leaned over the table and gently kissed her. Then he stood and helped her out of her chair. Once Athena was standing he put an arm around her shoulders. It took everything Sparkler and I had to not laugh out loud at the collective gasp that rang through the tavern.

Away from prying eyes our lovers went back to Cullen’s quarters and found a comfortable place to sit. Cullen asked, “Have you had a good time tonight?”

“I have, thank you. What about you?” Athena smiled at him.

“I don’t think it’s possible to have a bad time when I’m with you.” 

“Now-“ Athena started.

“Thank you for saying that you feel safe with me today,” Cullen nervously interrupted.

“How much did you hear?” Athena was once again hoping he didn’t hear her say she loved him.

“That’s when I was close enough to hear you; when you said that you felt safe and protected with me.” Cullen explained. 

Athena sighed in relief, which had him wondering, “Was there more that I didn’t hear?”

“Nothing important,” Duchess hedged and then accused, “How else was Leliana supposed to keep my mind off of what you were doing?”

“Next time I’m going to have Leliana scout out a secret passage,” Curly grumbled. “Why did you go with her without questioning her?”

“It was the first chance I had to talk with her about something other than the Inquisition and all the stuff that’s happened. When the blight happened I would read everything I could on it, and with Leliana being friends with the hero of Fereldan… I wanted to get to know her.”

"Ostwick wasn't in any danger from the blight…” Cullen was confused as to why she was so curious about the fifth blight.

“No…” Athena sighed in embarrassment, “Do you remember me telling you about the Templar I had a crush on?” Cullen nodded, she continued, “Well, he went back to the Fereldan circle, and until I hopefully saw him again, I wanted to keep tabs on him.”

“What was his name?” Cullen was very curious as to who this mysterious Templar was.

“I never talked to him.” Athena laughed, “I don’t even know what he looked like, because I only ever saw him with his helmet on. We only had one meeting and it was because I fell down the stairs, he helped me up, and asked if I was okay. His hands were gentle and strong, his voice wasn’t harsh like the others. All the other girls were going crazy over another Templar named Carroll… Anyway, in a couple days they left, then the blight happened, the Rebellion, and now here we are.”

“Athena…. That was me…” Cullen stopped, not sure what else to say.

“No… That can’t be… You never said that you were at Ostwick.” Athena said, stunned.

“In the first few years of training to be a Templar, because I was too young to take my vows, they had a few of us travel around to other circles to see how they worked. I completely forgot…” Cullen paused, wanting to be gentle with what he had to say, “I know that your parents’ silence and refusal to transfer you to Fereldan hurt you, but I am very glad that you weren’t.”

“I understand. In a way, I’m glad too.” Athena relaxed again.

"You are?" 

“At that time, I wouldn’t have been strong enough or centered enough to fight what happened, and from what you’ve told me of it… oh, Cullen, I wish I could take your pain away.” Athena wrapped her arms around Cullen. 

Fighting past the tears that sprang into his eyes, Cullen said hoarsely, “Thank you.”

For a while they just sat there holding each other. Keeping their thoughts to themselves, afraid to be vulnerable, but also grateful for the silent support. Athena was the first to speak, “Cullen?”

“Yes?” 

"Are my parents still here?" Athena sat up to look at him.

“They are. Did you want to see them?” Cullen sat up as well.

“No… Yes…” Athena made a low, helpless noise, “I don’t know…”

"You helped Dorian talk to his father after not speaking to each other.” Curly reminded her. He was thinking she would regret not speaking to her parents. 

“That was helping a friend, and I think Dorian would have regretted not speaking to his father.” Athena argued, more with herself than with Cullen.

“Do you think you’ll regret not speaking to them when you had the chance?” Cullen took her hands in his.

Athena looked down at their entwined hands as tears filled her eyes. When she looked back up at Cullen, they started to spill over. She answered brokenly with a yes.

Cullen wiped a tear away from Athena’s cheek, “I’ll set a meeting up.”

Athena thanked him, “Can we go for a walk?”

“Certainly.” Cullen said, they both stood up and walked out on to the battlements, holding hands.

They walked about half way around the battlements when Athena decided to stop. They had reached a tower that was a little worse for wear. And by worse for wear I mean it looked like it could come crumbling down at any moment. When she stopped, Cullen became concerned, “Athena?”

“I come here when I need to get away from everything.” Athena looked up at the crumbling tower.

“You come here? How did the workers miss this?” Cullen was incredulous. 

“I overheard one of them saying that it’s haunted.” Athena half smiled, “Come to the top with me?”

“You climb to the top, by yourself, in a tower that looks as though a half hearted kick could bring it down?” Cullen half wondered if she had a death wish. (Of course she did. She would try to get herself killed… Oh, daily. Depending on who she was facing, hourly.)

“It’s not that unstable.” Athena pulled on his hand, “Come with me… Please?”

"Tomorrow I am sending workers here to fix this.” Cullen reluctantly followed her.

When they reached the top, Athena stood with her back to Cullen and looked out over the mountains and valleys that were covered in the whitest snow, dappled by evergreens and shafts of moonlight. Athena drank in the beauty, whispering, “It’s breathtaking.”

Curly, on the other hand, was drinking in a far different view, but one just as lovely, “So are you.”

Athena gasped and turned to look at him. Cullen slid an arm around her back and kissed her, their profiles lit by moonlight. 

**

The morning came and everyone was talking about the spectacle of last night between the Commander and the Inquisitor. Cullen talked to Athena’s parents about meeting with her. The meeting was arranged for after lunch. Athena paced in Cullen’s office, so much so that Curly couldn’t get any work done. Finally, he gave up, came around his desk, and stood in front of her. When she reached him, he took her hands, “Athena, stop.”

“I can’t, I’m sorry.” Athena would not meet Cullen’s eyes, looking like a caged animal. Cullen pulled her gently to the settee and sat down with her. 

“Talk to me.” Cullen ordered in a gentle, but Commandery voice.

“I haven’t seen them since my tenth birthday. I had gotten very sick and First Enchanter Lydia sent word that I was on my death bed. If they wanted to say goodbye, they should come immediately.” Athena paused to take a breath, “when they arrived I had started to feel better. I was sitting up in bed, reading. They took one look at me, turned around, closed the door, and yelled at one of the Templars that they needed to speak to the First Enchanter immediately. The three of them proceeded to have a shouting match where I could hear every word. They called Lydia and me a liar. They said that my illness was a ruse to get them to leave their home. The First Enchanter stood up for me, telling them that they tried everything to get me well, and that nothing had worked. She had to remind them that I was their daughter and they have an obligation and responsibility to care for me. Then they accused her of trying to steal me away from them. The very people that never showed any interest in me when I was with them and sent me away claimed I was being stolen from them. Maybe this was a bad idea…”

"You can do this, and I will be right outside-“ Cullen was interrupted.

“No, please, I need you with me. Please stay?” Athena begged him. The thought of being alone with her parents terrified her more than anything Corypheus could have done to her.

“Are you sure?” He wanted to support Athena, but after what she just told him and Leliana’s report from yesterday, Cullen wanted to invite Duchess’ parents to a sparring match against him.

“Yes.”

“I’ll stay.” Cullen smiled at her and squeezed her hand.

There was a knock at the door and one of the soldiers came in, “Commander, Lord and Lady Trevelyan are here.”

“Are you ready?” Cullen asked Athena.

“No… But this needs to be done.” Athena stated with a shaky resolve. Curly smiled encouragingly at her.

“Send them in.” Cullen stood up, Athena did the same, gripping Curly’s hand.

“Commander Cullen, how good to see you again,” Evelyn’s voice was hollow in her greeting.

"Lady Evelyn and Lord Bernard.” Cullen was cool with his greeting. He did not want to see Athena hurt by these people again.

"Maker! Is that you Athena?” Lady Evelyn sounded as though she didn’t recognize her own daughter.

“Yes, Mother, it’s been a long time.” Athena stood a bit taller and looked her mother in the eye after Cullen encouragingly squeezed her hand.

“Would we be able to sit and talk, Commander?” Lady Evelyn asked.

“Certainly. After you, Inquisitor.” Athena looked at Cullen, startled that he used her title. He smiled at her, reminding Duchess that she was the one in power now. Athena led them to a table that had four seats, she and Cullen on one side, her parents on the other.

“You seem to be doing well for yourself, my dear.” Lady Evelyn said to break the awkward silence.

“If trying to keep the world from descending into chaos and destruction, is doing well, than yes, I’m doing well.” Athena sarcastically responded. (Sparkler and I have taught her well. Nervous? Afraid? Angry? Happy? Respond with sarcasm.)

“No friends?” Lady Evelyn pried, pretending to care.

“I have amazing friends. They care about me, and I, them. They also enjoy spending time with me.” Athena was barely holding on to her emotions.

“Oh, my dear child, we wanted to spend time with you.” Lady Evelyn reached out for Athena.

Athena pulled her free hand back as if it had been scalded. With pain lancing her voice, she asked, “Then why didn’t you?”

“We couldn’t,” Lady Evelyn implored Athena, “you have to understand, you were just a child. We couldn’t explain to you what was going on.”

“What do you mean?” Athena was rightfully suspicious.

“You didn’t tell her?” Lady Evelyn asked the Commander.

“It wasn’t my place to tell her. It should have come from you and Lord Bernard long ago.” Cullen voice was clipped with anger.

“Mother…” Athena was getting angry.

“Your father is… a blood mage. The reason I got so angry when you brought animals home was because I couldn’t bear the thought of them being killed, and you being hurt by losing them, so I always told you that they ran away. When in fact, your father used them for his magic.

“I’m sure you remember the cat. Yes, you were coming into your powers, but you didn’t kill her. Your father did, because he wanted to teach you blood magic. For better or worse, I didn’t want you to become like him. So, I sent you away, as far away as I could get you. Then I found out your father could be made tranquil. I was terrified that he would kill me and come looking for you. I couldn’t allow that, so I rushed to get him to the tranquil state… But something went horribly wrong, and he can no longer speak or even be self reliant without me.”

“Now is the time you choose to tell me this? Why?” Athena was starting to shake with fear, anger, revulsion… She wasn’t sure.

"Before your father went silent he told me that he was serving an old god with his blood magic. Isn’t that who gave you the thing on your hand?” Lady Evelyn was clueless.

“No. By my picking up an elven artifact being used, I ruined Corypheus’ plans. If you are trying to imply that I am following in my father’s footsteps, you are sadly mistaken. Corypheus is not an “old god” he is the thing we are trying to save the world from.”

“No blood magic?” Lady Evelyn asked, again completely clueless.

“If you had stayed in touch over the years, you would know that even attempting such a thing has never crossed my mind.” Athena looked out the window, dismissing her mother.

“It’s time to go.” Cullen ordered and stood.

“Athena, I hope someday, you can find it in your heart to forgive us. Take care of her, Commander, she’s all I have.” With that Lady Evelyn and Lord Bernard were shown to the door by Cullen. After he closed the door, he went back to Athena’s side and held her as she cried.


	9. Chapter 9

Bianca (long story that I’m not getting into,) showed up to let me know that she needed our help. I hadn’t seen Athena for a while, so I went looking for her. She was usually pretty easy to pick out of a crowd, despite her being petite. I couldn’t find her anywhere, so I made my way to Curly’s office. “Have you seen the Inquisitor?”

"She's sleeping. What do you need?" Cullen did not look up from the papers he was reading. In fact, he looked pretty irritated.

“Sleeping? In the middle of the day? That’s not like her.” Now I was worried.

“Varric, what do you need?” Curly looked up at me, and I could tell that something big happened.

“Remember, Curly, I consider Athena a friend, and if she’s been hurt…”

“There’s nothing you can do. What do you need?”

“I have someone she should meet. This person knows of where they’re mining red lyrium.” I realized I wasn’t going to get the story from Cullen.

“I’ll let her know when she wakes.” Cullen went back to work. 

I left wondering when he was going to own up to loving Duchess. I also thought about what odds I could give Dorian so I could come out on top.

When Athena walked in to the main hall, I called out and motioned for her to come over, so I could introduce her to my “friend”. “Inquisitor, this is Bianca.”

Athena looked at me, startled that another would have the same name as my crossbow. She turned her attention to Bianca and smiled, “Nice to meet you.” 

Bianca told her about Valammar, and how the enemies were mining red lyrium there. Athena’s response was to head out to stop them from unleashing even more shit.

**

Valammar was an old dwarven out post that led to the Deep Roads. And the Deep Roads were mostly taken over by darkspawn. But Valammar itself was still in relatively decent shape. Of course we had to fight darkspawn and various other things to get to where we needed to go.

When we found Bianca’s key, she revealed that it was because of her that the red Templars got in. Athena was disappointed, but forgiving… I think it was more for my sake than Bianca’s. Bianca got her key back, and there was one less area to mine for red lyrium.

On the trip back to Skyhold, I asked Athena if she was sick.

“No, why?”

“Because since I’ve known you, you have not taken a nap.” I griped. A nap sounded wonderful.

There was a slight quiver to her chin when she answered, “it’s a long story, Varric.”

“I have time.” I wanted Duchess to trust me, and I was worried about her. 

Athena stopped walking and looked at me, “Please understand that it’s not that I don’t trust you, because I do… But it’s still too raw to even attempt talking about right now.”

“I understand.”

We returned to Skyhold and went our separate ways. I went to plan a game of Wicked Grace for the next night. The time of the game came quickly and I was only missing one person- Athena. I found her in the main hall. “Would you be interested in a game of Wicked Grace?”

“Yes, I would.” Athena smiled at me.

“Look who came to join us!” I said as we entered the tavern.

“Inquisitor!” Everyone but Vivienne and Leliana said, because they weren’t there.

"Please call me Athena, at the very least for tonight.” Athena sat down across from Curly.

"I really should get back to work, I have a thousand things to do." Curly tried to excuse himself. I think he was worried about embarrassing himself in front of Duchess.

“Please stay?” Athena gently encouraged him.

“You need a hobby, Commander.” I said as Josephine dealt out the cards.

The bets were placed and as the night wore on Curly told a story of a recruit who came in to the dining hall with only his knickers on without realizing it. After a slow clap from everyone in the dining hall, the recruit realized he left little to the imagination. He saluted his commander and left like he was in full armor. 

I told a story or two at Athena's insistence, and the time came where only Curly, Ruffles, and Athena were still playing. Cullen uttered the words, “I’ve figured out your tells, Lady Ambassador, deal me in.” 

“I’m in,” Athena shared a smile with Josephine.

As each hand progressed, Curly lost more and more of his clothes until… Well… Until nothing was left. I laughed and Cullen griped, “Not a word, dwarf.”

“Never bet against an Antivan, Curly,” I got up from the table with everyone else except Athena, who just sat there smiling at Cullen. Curly shook his head and Athena stood up and turned around so he could have a “graceful” exit.

Athena and I walked back to the keep, she said, “This was fun. I wish we could do it every night.”

“I think it’s going to take some convincing to get Curly to play again, but I’ll get him there. So, you’d be up for another game then?” 

“Yes, in a heartbeat. Goodnight, Varric.” And Athena headed to her quarters.

“Goodnight, Duchess.”

The next day Curly and Athena met for lunch on the battlements, and she tried to convince him to play another game of Wicked Grace. “I thought you were adorable last night.”

“I don’t need any help embarrassing myself in front of you.” Cullen was still sore over how much he lost and changed the subject, “We need to continue your chess lessons.”

“I get to be the one losing my clothes now?” Athena teased, not letting him off the hook easily.

Cullen coughed to avoid blushing and murmured, “I still can’t find my…” Having second thoughts he said, “Never mind. We won’t be playing for those stakes.” 

After they were done eating, Curly pulled out the chess board and continued to teach Athena how to play chess. Cullen said, “No, the pawn can’t move that way.”

“All right...” Athena tried to jump her pawn with her king.

“Your supposed to protect the king, otherwise you’ll lose, and your king can’t jump.”

Athena laughed, "Now, who’s making a fool of themselves?”

“You’re learning, that’s entirely different.” 

"Yes, just like you were learning Josephine's tells last night." Athena smiled at him, enjoying the light heartedness of the past day.

Cullen groaned, “You’re not going to let it go, are you?”

Athena shook her head, “Not until you play another game, and you’re adorable when you blush.”

Curly closed his eyes and shook his head, “That’s not a compliment.”

“Don’t worry, Cullen, I find you adorable in other ways too.”

Cullen opened his eyes with a sultry glint in them, “Do you now?”

He stood and came over to her side of the table. Pulled her up from her seat and placed an arm behind Athena’s back, “I find everything adorable about you.” As Curly went to kiss her someone entered.

“Commander.” The soldier said.

“What?” Curly growled, wondering how it was possible that the moment he goes to kiss Athena, someone interrupts them.

“I have a report for you.” The soldier tried to hand him the report.

“And?” Cullen turned to look at the soldier, none too happy.

“I should… Put it on your desk…” The soldier gulped and promptly left.

"If you need to work..." She didn't get to finish, Curly silenced her with a kiss. After the kiss ended, Duchess groaned, “I don’t want this to end.”

“Why would it?” Cullen usually didn’t forget things, but Athena could very easily distract him.

“We have to stop the assassination of Empress Celene.” Athena reminded him.

“Then we’ll just have to continue this another time.” Cullen smirked.

“I’ll let Josephine and Leliana know that we're ready.” Athena reluctantly left Cullen’s arms. She looked back before she went down the stairs and saw that Cullen was watching her and she smiled. Cullen didn’t leave his spot until she disappeared from view.


	10. Chapter 10

The winter palace in Halamshiral was beautiful, with white marble columns and stately statues and fountains… “the game” of politics was decidedly not. During the ball Empress Celene of Orlais would be holding peace talks. It was the Inquisition’s job to find out who wanted to assassinate her, and bring them to justice. Of course there were venatori, agents of Corypheus there, along with a usurper, and a jilted lover of Empress Celene. Fun times! 

As Athena was courting favor with everyone there (easy for her to do, being so likable and all,) she noticed that Curly was surrounded by men and women flirting with him. She couldn’t resist teasing him a little, “You have quite the following, Commander. Should I be worried?”

“Ha ha, Inquisitor. Maker’s breath, I’m not used to this.” Cullen reeled on someone behind him, “Did you just pinch my bottom?”

“I couldn’t resist! It’s so cute!” The bottom pincher gushed.

"After you dance with all of your admirers, save a dance for me?” 

"No, I'm not dancing with anyone..." Cullen groused and then paused as Athena's eyes grew wide, “I’m sorry, I have been asked to dance so many times tonight that I’m turning down the one person I care about without an explanation. Templars didn’t go to balls, and I’m not very good at dancing.”

“I understand, we didn’t exactly have balls in Ostwick either.” Athena said, “I need to go. Have fun with your admirers.”   
Curly groaned in response.

Athena went off to investigate and kill some venatori, she also ran into Morrigan, who was serving as Empress Celene’s occult advisor. While Athena was telling Leliana all that she learned, she over heard someone asking Curly if he was married. Leliana and her both stopped to listen to the response. “I am not married, but there is someone I care deeply for.”

“So, still single then?” Another of his admirers asked.

Athena looked at Leliana trying very hard not to laugh. Leliana chuckled, “For as much as you care about him, you’re having too much fun with this.”

“He doesn’t believe me when I tell him how others desire him.” Athena giggled.

“He doesn’t believe you?” Leliana was stunned. Athena shook her head. Leliana smirked, “You’re not going to let him live this night down are you?”

“Never.” Athena promised, looking at an increasingly uncomfortable Curly.

“I knew I liked you.” Leliana laughed.

"I believe the Grand Duchess Florianne is looking for me..." Athena left to dance with the Grand Duchess.

Cullen was able to leave his admirers briefly and asked Leliana, “What were you two talking about?”

Without missing a beat, Leliana responded, “That we need to go shoe shopping.”

Curly looked at her suspiciously and then a lady squeezed his upper arm and gushed, “Ooh, so strong.”

"Maker help me." Curly groaned and went back to his post with his throng of admirers.

**

Athena and the Grand Duchess danced and talked, surrounded by ornate columns and costumes of various fashions of whirling skirts and flowing coattails. Everyone was talking about them. Once they left the dance floor, Curly, Ruffles, and Nightingale were waiting for Athena. 

“You are the talk of the evening!” Ruffles was very excited.

“What did you learn?” Leliana asked.

“The assassination attempt will be happening tonight, and there’s something off about the Grand Duchess.”

“What do you mean?” Cullen wanted to know about possible dangers.

“I’m not sure, it just seems as though she has her own motive for this ball.” Athena tried to explain, but it was just a feeling, she couldn’t offer any proof, “I’m going to see if I can get more information at least.”

"Be careful," Cullen warned.

“Always.” Athena smiled at him.

“Should we put bodyguards around the Commander as well?” Leliana asked, causing Athena to laugh.

“I have to go,” Athena disappeared in to the crowd.

"Leliana! I am perfectly capable of protecting myself.” 

“Not from your admirers, it would seem.” Leliana chuckled. Curly groaned and went to make sure the soldiers were ready to move.

“What’s this?” Josephine wondered what she was missing on the other side of the ballroom.

"Our Commander has several admirers who have taken small liberties with him.” Leliana explained.

“And has Athena noticed?” Josephine had to know.

“She has.”

“What does she think?” 

“She finds it hilarious.” Leliana informed her and Josephine laughed as they parted ways.

**

Athena, unfortunately, was not having such a fun time as the Grand Duchess ordered her minions to kill her in the garden, so the Grand Duchess (who was under Corypheus’ sway) could assassinate the Empress. Of course, our heroine succeeded in defeating those that wanted to kill her and stopped the assassination attempt. Florianne was publicly humiliated, and because Athena believes in peace and is a hopeless romantic, she reunited the Empress with her elven lover, Briala. Orlais could finally have peace after years of war. Toasts rang out in her honor, and… Athena hid on the balcony.

“’Tis odd to find the one who saved the Empress out here alone.” Morrigan said as she stood beside Athena.

“I needed a moment to breathe. Thank you for your help.”

"You are quite welcome. It appears you will be getting more of my help in the future.” Morrigan was cryptic.

“Oh? How so?” Athena was curious as to what that meant.

“The Empress has assigned me to the Inquisition as a liaison.” Morrigan explained.

“I’m glad to have your future help as well, Morrigan.” Athena smiled at her.

“And you are very gracious. I will meet you in Skyhold.” Morrigan left.

A couple minutes later Athena heard, “There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you.” Cullen noticed how heavily she was using the wall for support. “Athena, are you injured?”

Athena turned to look at him, “No, I’m just tired. It’s been a very long and draining night.” 

“I know it’s foolish, but I was worried for you tonight… You looked amazing when you danced,” Curly stood beside her.

“You can thank Josephine for that. Learning to dance has been a daily thing with her.” Athena sounded as though she may have been complaining.

“Who was your dance partner?” Cullen took her hand and pulled Athena toward him.

“Sometimes Josephine, sometimes Leliana with Josephine instructing, which got interesting.” Athena’s voice softened as she gazed in to his warm, brown eyes.

“I may never get this chance again. May I have this dance, my lady?” Cullen requested with a gentlemanly air.

“I would love to. I thought you didn’t dance.” 

“For you, I’ll try.”

As they twirled around the balcony. Athena couldn’t resist teasing Cullen a little, “Your admirers will get jealous.”

“Your admiration is the only one I care about.” Cullen pulled her tighter against him and Athena beamed. 

**

Athena and her advisors agreed that if we could find the commander of Corypheus’ army, we could deal the enemy quite a blow. The search for Samson led us to the Emerald Graves. A place where the elves planted a tree for everyone they lost during the Exalted March against them. We ran into freemen, Red Templars, and some nasty wild life, but we succeeded in our mission.

We got back from the Emerald Graves incredibly late and Curly was waiting for Duchess. As we said goodnight to her, she saw him, “Cullen, you didn’t have to wait for me.”

“I wanted to.” He walked over to her and kissed her, “I wish I could be fighting at your side. Every day you go out and risk your life for everyone, and my duties keep me here.”

“If we are to have a chance of defeating Corypheus at all, you need to do exactly what your doing. I’ve heard the soldiers talking about you and they look up to you. If you go off with me, who would train them?” Athena questioned as they walked to Cullen’s office.

“I could get someone else to train them, and not a single soldier would fault me for wanting to protect you.” Curly argued as they reached the battlements. 

“But they wouldn’t be trained to your standards, and then you would throw the trainers out and I would never see you.” 

“We barely have any time now, but I see your point.” Cullen conceded the argument and they walked in silence until they reached his office.

“I found these messages in the Emerald Graves. I thought you would be interested in them.” Athena handed the letters to him.

“I’ll look at them in the morning. Right now all I want to do is be with you.” Cullen half smiled at her, taking the letters from her and placing them on his desk.

“I want to be with you too.” Athena collapsed on his couch, “unfortunately, there will be no dancing or an excess of admirers tonight.”

“Between you and Leliana, I’m never going to live that down,” Cullen murmured, blushing as he sat beside her. Surprised by the mischievous smile that was tugging at the corners of Athena’s mouth, he asked, “You really weren’t upset by those people?”

“No, I wasn’t. If I had any doubts, I wouldn’t be here now, and I find you even more attractive when you blush.” She lightly teased.

“You know you do a well enough job of that on your own?” Curly grumbled, blushing even more in the dim light.

Athena laughed, “Don’t worry, you have the same effect on me. Especially when Varric, Dorian, and Iron Bull start asking questions, or worse, teasing me.”

“I don’t want to know. What…” Curly stopped, and getting a hold on his curiosity, continued, “No, I’m going to stick with I don’t want to know.”

Athena laughed again, prompting Cullen to compliment her, “You have the most beautiful laugh.” He then silenced the lilting laugh with a kiss. Which was rudely interrupted by a knock on the door.

"And here I thought we were the only two still awake that aren’t on the night watch.” Athena murmured as Cullen went to the door. 

"Sorry to interrupt, Commander, but Sister Nightingale is looking for the Inquisitor.” Athena heard the soldier say.

“Thank you, I’ll let her know.” Cullen closed the door. 

“Leliana normally waits for me to come to her…” Athena sounded concerned as she stood.

"It must be important if she’s searching you out this late at night.” Cullen said as Athena moved closer to him… And the door. 

"I agree." Athena gazed at him for a minute, debating on if she should just leave or kiss him. Deciding against the former, she stood on tiptoe and kissed Curly. When the kiss ended she whispered, wishing Cullen a good night and saw a glimpse of a blush starting. Duchess smiled as she walked away.

Athena found Leliana in the tower above the library, “Leliana?”

“Yes?” Nightingale said without looking up, engrossed in the report she was reading.

"You asked for me?”

“Oh! Athena! I’m sorry… I didn’t interrupt anything did I?” Leliana looked up and smiled at the woman she was quickly becoming friends with.

“We were just talking. What did you need?” Athena sat across from her.

“There is someone I want you to meet.” Leliana motioned for Athena to follow her to the balcony.

Nightingale closed the door behind them and the hero of Fereldan stepped out of the shadows and pushed her raven hair back from her shoulder, “Inquisitor Trevelyan.”

Athena shook her head, dismissing the formality, “Please call me Athena. It’s an honor to meet you.”

“My name is Selene. Could I ask a favor of you?” 

“A favor from me?” Athena was trying very hard to not act like one of my adoring public.

“My favor is to ask if you could give this to Alistair the next time you see him.” Selene held out a necklace and a letter, “I want to return home, but I can’t yet, and he needs to know why.”

“When would I see him?” Athena questioned, she only met the King briefly and he was not happy when they met.

“Josie didn’t tell you?” Leliana was surprised as Josephine was adamant that she tell Duchess about the King coming. 

“I just got back from the Emerald Graves. I had assumed that most, if not all, were asleep because of getting back so late.” Athena explained why she didn’t search anyone out.

“Was the Commander pacing at the gate?” Leliana smirked.

“Not that I saw…” Athena wasn’t sure what her romance with Cullen had to do with this.

Selene smiled, remembering her travels fondly, “We had a similar conversation, once upon at time, didn’t we Leliana?”

“At least Alistair could go with you on most of the missions…” Leliana paused to see if she had Athena’s permission to continue. Gaining it, Leliana did her best to embarrass poor Curly, (she must have lost another chess game while we were in the Graves,) “The Commander is here overseeing the soldiers, and there are days where I think he would rather be out there with the Inquisitor.”

"Commander Cullen?” Selene asked for clarification.

“Yes,” Leliana and Athena said together.

“He was such a kind young man, I wish there had been some way to keep him from the torment of the Fereldan Circle.” Selene’s voice held a lot of regret.

"You knew him then?" Athena was curious as to why this was the first time she was hearing about Cullen knowing the hero of Fereldan.

“We had talked a couple times. When I was finally able to reach him in the circle he said that I was a hallucination. I tried to reassure him that I was indeed real and that we were going to get him out, but I don’t think he believed me, and I understand why.” Selene looked out over the mountains.

“King Alistair will be arriving this evening, to make a better impression than the first one.” Leliana said to change the subject. The silence had become awkward.

Athena nodded in understanding and turned her attention to the Hero of Fereldan, “I’ll deliver your message.”

“Thank you, both of you.” Selene disappeared.

“How did she do that?” Athena asked and then yawned.

“She’s a very special mage. Just like you.” Leliana said, “Go get some rest, you’re going to need it.”

Athena stumbled down the stairs and in to the library, half asleep. Dorian went over to her, “My dear, are you well?”

"Just a little tired," Athena was barely able to keep her eyes open.

“I’m going to make sure you get to your room safely.” Dorian lifted her up and started carrying her, “you weigh absolutely nothing. When was the last time you ate?”

“Yesterday… Sometime… I think…” Athena drifted in and out of consciousness. 

Dorian shook his head reprovingly, but it was lost on the now sleeping Inquisitor. Fortunately, only Ruffles and Curly were in the main hall as Dorian barged in. When he saw Cullen, he requested, “A little help, Commander?” 

“Maker’s breath!” Cullen rushed over to take Athena from Dorian.

“You really shouldn’t keep her up all night after fighting giants, red Templars, and such.” Dorian groused.

“I didn’t. She got back late last night and as we were talking, Leliana needed her. This is the first I’ve seen her since Leliana sent for her.” Curly was too worried about Duchess to be too annoyed with Sparkler’s accusatory tone.

“Quickly, take her to her room before everyone returns to the hall.” Ruffles stepped in before the argument continued, “you can argue later.”

Listening to Josephine, Cullen carried Athena, who snuggled into him and murmured his name. Which, of course, got Curly to blush. 

Dorian walked up to Athena’s quarters with them, in silence. Once Athena was safely in bed, Cullen and Dorian walked out on to her balcony. Dorian watched the sun disappear behind dark clouds as he asked, “She doesn’t get to spend much time here does she?” 

“No, she doesn’t, all the more reason to defeat Corypheus.” Cullen looked back at a sleeping Athena.

“When she wakes, make sure she eats something, Commander? I’m not sure if it was Athena being mostly asleep, but she couldn’t remember if she ate yesterday.” Dorian informed him and took his leave.

Cullen moved to the side of the bed and heard Athena murmur something about dancing and admirers, he whispered, “Even in your sleep you won’t let it go.” He gently pulled her brunette hair back from her face, and whispered again, “you are so beautiful.”

Curly left briefly to gather some things to work on, while he was walking back through the main hall Leliana and Josephine were talking quietly. Leliana saw him first, “Is Athena well?”

“Leliana, it won’t do to have the Inquisitor falling asleep on the battlefield.” Cullen was quite perturbed at himself and the spymaster for thinking Athena could constantly keep going like a dwarven lamp or a demon.

“I know and I’m sorry, but it was urgent. Can you give this to her when she wakes?” Leliana handed him the letter and necklace that Selene wanted delivered to King Alistair.

“What is it?” Cullen took the items and eyed them suspiciously.

“A letter and a necklace for her to give King Alistair tonight. If she has admirers they stay far away, unlike yours in Halamshiral.” Leliana teased.

Cullen rolled his eyes and went up to Athena’s quarters. Where he worked quietly and wrote a short letter to his sister. He wondered if he should stay. Athena was safely sleeping, and as much as he cared for her, he did not want it to seem as though he was being over protective of her, but to see her being carried bothered him more than he would like to admit. The decision was taken out of his hands by Athena waking.

Athena stirred, feeling around with her eyes still closed and then she sat upright with her violet eyes wide open… The last thing she remembered was going down the stairs from speaking with Leliana.

"How did I get here?" Athena asked, seeing Cullen sitting at her desk. Which was an odd sight considering her desk was a delicate looking thing, and Curly wasn’t exactly delicate.

“Dorian carried you down from the library, and I carried you here.” Cullen stood and walked over to the bed so they weren’t half a room apart.

“Did anyone else…?” Athena tried to get her sleep-addled brain to wake.

“Just Josephine.” Cullen sighed, the last thing he wanted to do was reprimand her, but he now feared for her safety, “Athena, you cannot do this to yourself. This time it was just sleep, and Dorian was there to catch you. If something should happen to you… I don’t know what I would do if…” Cullen stopped, afraid he was being too forward.

"I'm sorry, I did have every intention of getting sleep..." Athena started to explain.

“I guess Leliana and I are to blame for that.” Curly looked away from her in guilt.

“Cullen,” Athena waited until he looked at her, “Even if you hadn’t been waiting for me, I would have sought you out to see if you were awake before finding my own bed.”

“The letters could have waited until morning.” Cullen reprimanded her.

“That’s not the reason.” Athena blushed as she sat, wincing in pain.

"Then what is the reason? Are you injured?” Curly saw her wince.

“No, I’m just sore. The Emerald Graves’ tree roots and I didn’t get along. I kept tripping over them, by the end of our time there, I was starting to think that the trees were out to get me. The reason I wanted to find out if you were still awake was because I missed you. I was hoping for a goodnight kiss.” Athena played with her blanket, a pink blush deepened to red. She did not dare to meet Cullen’s brown eyes.

Cullen gently placed his fingers on her chin and lifted her gaze to his, “I missed you, too.” And then he started to kiss her, which was rudely interrupted by her stomach growling, “When was the last time you ate?”

Athena thought for a while. She couldn’t remember and guessed, “Yesterday morning… I think?”

Cullen shook his head, finding her answer unacceptable, "Stay here, do not move from that bed. I'll get some food.”

“Bring some for yourself too,” Athena called after him, perfectly content to listen to Curly until a shaft of watery sunlight glinted off the necklace she was to give King Alistair.

Getting out of bed with a blanket wrapped around her, she walked over to her desk and picked the necklace up. With another weak shaft of sunlight catching it, a rainbow of colors splashed across the wall behind Athena’s bed. Athena thought she saw a map come in to focus for a brief second, but it just as quickly disappeared with the sun being blotted out by rain clouds. Dismissing what she saw as exhaustion still toying with her, she placed the necklace back on her desk and walked out on to the balcony. She quickly lost herself in the gentle wind.

Cullen returned with two people carrying trays of food. He paused, drinking in the vision Athena presented of being clothed in a plaid purple blanket, with the backdrop of grey clouds and white balcony, as a man dying of thirst drinks the last drops of water. After the servants left, he lightly reprimanded her, “I thought I told you to stay in bed."

Athena turned and smiled sheepishly at him, “I saw the necklace glinting in sunlight and got curious.” 

“If I remember correctly I put it on the desk… Not the balcony.” Curly walked over to her.

“You did. The only time I’m ever here is to sleep and the balcony has always called to me, I never have a chance to be on it.” She reached for Cullen’s hand.

He took her hand and with better judgement than I will ever have, said, “As much as I want to kiss you right now, you need to eat.” 

Athena blushed and followed him in from the balcony to a table laden with food. When Athena saw it she quipped, “I didn’t know the army was joining us. My quarters may prove to be a bit small.”

Curly laughed, “It is a lot of food. But the cook was none too pleased to hear that you hadn’t eaten in over a day.”

They ate in companionable silence until Athena had her fill. She sat for a couple minutes watching him going back for seconds and thirds. Athena teased, “Maybe the army they wanted to feed is you?”

“Ha ha. Are you done?” Curly said between the last bites of his meal.

Athena laughed, “I’ve been done for a while… Not that you could see over the mountain of food.” Cullen put down his fork and pushed away from the table, “if you’re still hungry, please don’t stop. I just wanted to tease you a little.”

“No, I had my fill. Plus, royalty is coming tonight.” Cullen stretched. He felt a bit uneasy about having royalty at Skyhold.

“You’ve never met the King?”

“I’ve met him, but we’ve never had an occasion to really get to know each other.” Cullen said, “are you going to tell me why Leliana needed to see you?”

"She had someone she wanted me to meet.” Athena hedged. She wasn’t sure how Cullen would react to the news of her meeting the hero of Fereldan.

“Who did you meet?” He pried, it was unlike Athena to avoid answering his questions.

Athena hesitated, and then asked, “Are you sure you want to know? It was someone from your past.”

“I’ve accepted much of my past, Athena, and I don’t want you to ever be afraid to tell me anything.” Cullen assured her.

"Can we move away from the mountain of food first?" Athena asked, mostly as a stall tactic.

Cullen laughed, "yes."

As they got up from the table and walked away from it, Athena said, “Your laughter is far too rare of a thing. I wish I could bottle it up and take it with me.”

“Stop it.” Cullen ordered as they sat on Athena’s settee.

“What?” Athena asked innocently.

“Trying to make me blush and distract me from what I asked you.”

“I was being honest…” Athena paused, looked at Cullen and said, “Leliana had me meet the hero of Fereldan. She’s the one the necklace and letter are from. She also…” Athena stopped, not sure if she should or could continue.

“Athena, it’s okay.” Cullen quietly encouraged her.

Athena sighed, “She told me that you had been acquainted and that when she found you in the Fereldan circle, you thought she was a hallucination. She also wished that there had been some way to keep you from the torture you went through.”

Cullen nodded and looked away from Athena to hide the tears in his eyes. She refused to let him, and gently moved his gaze to meet hers. She whispered, “Don’t do that. Don’t turn away from me, you have every right to these tears. They’ve been too long in coming.”

In response Cullen crushed her in his arms and, finally, let the tears flow. Once his emotion was spent, he whispered hoarsely, “Thank you.” 

As he loosened his grip, Athena let out a small groan moving her leg out from underneath her. Cullen cleared his throat, “I’m sorry.”

Athena shook her head, “It wasn’t you. I decided it was a good idea to sit on my ankle…”

Josephine came bursting in, “You're still in a blanket?! Athena, this will never do! King Alistair is almost here!”

Cullen and Athena laughed in response.

“I’m glad my panic is a source of amusement to you two…” Josephine paused, realizing that Athena was wrapped in a blanket, “Oh dear, did I interrupt something?”

“We wouldn’t be laughing if you had.” Cullen kissed Athena, and said, “I’ll see you later.”

"Commander.” Josephine said as he passed.

“Ambassador.” Curly responded and left the room.

“You have been able to rest, yes?” Ruffles asked.

“Yes, I have and fed as well. Make sure this food doesn’t go to waste, please?” 

"Certainly. Now, you need to get dressed.” Ruffles pulled out a very frilly, big, and orange dress. Athena shook her head with terror in her eyes. About the fifth dress in, Josephine found one that was the same shade as Athena’s violet eyes, with a light shimmer to it. The dress had no frills to speak of, and was very simple in design. Athena nodded in agreement.

Once the dress was on, Athena’s brown hair was shining and cascading down her back, Athena and Ruffles looked at Athena in the mirror. Josephine smiled and complimented her, “You look lovely.”

“Thank you.” Athena was in agreement.

“Cullen will have many people to fight for your attention tonight.” Ruffles teased.

"He's the only one I want, Josie.” 

“You two make a stunning couple,” Ruffles said. The horns blared, announcing the arrival of King Alistair.

“That’s our cue, I guess.” Athena grabbed Selene’s letter and necklace.

Josephine stepped in front of her, “Wait... I want you to make an entrance as well.”

"Josie..." Athena warned. She was not fond of big productions.

“Nothing like at the Winter Palace. This is your home, and I want everyone to know it. All you have to do is wait until everyone arrives in the hall and then come down the stairs. Nothing extravagant.” Ruffles assured her.

“I think I can manage that.” Athena agreed as Ruffles left to greet the King.


	11. Chapter 11

The noise level grew beneath Athena’s quarters and she started to worry that she had missed her “moment”. The door opened and a hastily said, “it’s time,” proved her wrong.

Athena came down the stairs and walked on to the platform to stand in front of her "throne". Ruffles motioned for her to not move any further. All of a sudden the throne lit up, effectively putting a shining light on Athena. Everyone gasped on seeing her.

Cullen was the first to approach her, “You look-” He faltered for words.

“Amazing, stunning, the most beautiful woman in Skyhold, all of Thedas, the world.” Dorian helpfully chimed in.

“Thank you,” Athena said, but she only had eyes for Curly.

"I don't exist," Sparkler spoke softly and moved away to chat it up with me and Bull. Once he reached us, he confessed, “if I desired women, nothing would stop me from trying to have her love.”

"The Boss is certainly beautiful." Bull agreed.

“Commander Cullen has had a great weight lifted off of him, he’s softer, like a warm blanket with ragged edges, but no tears.” Cole joined us.

Ruffles finally allowed Athena to move, and Cullen walked along with her, arm in arm. Cullen asked, “Did you do that?”

“The light show?” Athena questioned, Cullen nodded his head in assent, “No, I’ve only ever used my magic to heal or fight, and less fighting with it would be good.”

“You look…” Cullen faltered again.

Athena giggled, “You've said that already. You look very handsome.” Curly had a red formal jacket and breeches on, which was nothing to write home about, according to him.

“Thank you.” Curly tried very hard not to blush, and failed.

They made their way through the throngs of people and met with Josephine who was talking with King Alistair. 

“Ambassador, I thought you said nothing extravagant?” Athena asked.

“It was just a little dwarven crafting. I had to do something, after all, this is your home.” Ruffles smiled patiently. She understood that Athena did not have much experience with showiness.

“Josephine, what am I going to do with you?” Athena half laughed.

“You’re going to let me formally introduce you to the King.” Josephine smiled brightly, in her element, “King Alistair, I would like to formally introduce you to the Inquisitor, Athena Trevelyan and Commander Cullen Rutherford.”

“It’s nice to formally meet you,” Alistair and Athena said at the same time.

“Commander Cullen, have we met before?” Alistair asked.

“Once, a long time ago.” 

“The Fereldan Circle, was it?” Alistair was unintentionally digging at a barely healed wound for Cullen.

“Yes.” Cullen’s answer was short and he was squeezing Athena’s hand a little harder. He really did not want to get in to a conversation about his past now.

“It was requested that I give this to you.” Athena gave him the necklace and letter, hoping to distract the King from interrogating Cullen further.

"I am in your debt, Inquisitor. Thank you.” Alistair turned the items over in his hands. He looked excited and worried to read the letter.

Before Alistair requested that they sit to eat, they heard Sera shouting at someone. In response to the noise, Athena requested to be excused, to keep Sera from embarrassing herself further.

“No, you stay here. I’ll talk to them.” Cullen ordered and left to calm Sera.

As Sera saw him, she stopped arguing. He asked them both to follow him, which they did, like petulant children. The trio left the keep so prying eyes and ears wouldn’t be privy to what Cullen had planned for them.

“Inquisitor, Your Majesty, I must be attending to other things.” Josephine said and disappeared into the crowd.

“Inquisitor…” Alistair started.

“Please call me Athena. I’ve never been much for titles.” Athena stopped him, preferring to be informal as Alistair seemed to be a good man.

“Athena, does Cullen remember what happened?” 

“At the Fereldan circle?” Athena questioned to clarify. Alistair nodded his head.

“Yes, he remembers.” Athena watched the doorway, anxiously awaiting Cullen’s return.

“You care for him a great deal, don’t you?” Alistair took a glass of wine off a passing tray and took a sip.

“I do, he’s an amazing man.”

“Your Majesty,” Leliana walked up to Alistair.

“Leliana!” Alistair whined. He hated it when his friends used his title.

“I am sorry your- Alistair, but I really have to go now.” Athena said, she could hear odd noises coming from outside and it worried her. Stepping outside, she was surprised by the sight of Sera and some nobleman with fencing epees, and they were fighting it out. 

Curly saw her watching and motioned for her to come down, meeting her half way.

“Are you trying to kill them?” Athena asked.

“No, these are blunted, they’re used for training only,” Cullen winced as Sera whacked the nobleman on the arm, “they may end up with a few welts though.”

“Maybe they’ll stop fighting now.” Athena hoped.

“Doubtful, but at least they can vent their anger out here, away from everyone else.”

"Do you have to stay and watch them?" Athena hooked her arm through his.

“Someone should. What brought you out here?” Cullen looked down into her violet eyes.

“I heard noises…” Athena paused and a pink tinge stained her cheeks, “… And I missed you.”

Curly looked down at her upturned face and smiled, “Let’s go inside, I’ll send someone else out to make sure there aren’t any serious injuries.”

Cullen briefly talked with a soldier and sent them outside to watch over Sera and her noble “friend”. Leliana motioned them over and asked, “What’s going on?”

“A training exercise,” Curly answered. Athena bit her lip to keep from chuckling.

“What did you do, Commander?” Alistair wondered if it would work for those that bickered around him.

“I gave them blunted swords and let them have at it.” Cullen said.

“Good, maybe now they’ll stop going at each other’s throats.” Leliana hoped, “Let’s eat.”

After dinner Athena was distracted by Josephine talking to someone that just entered, murmuring, “Where do I know him from?”

Alistair, Cullen, and Leliana followed her gaze. Alistair responded, “He came to my court claiming that you were once lovers and that when the Ostwick circle fell, you left him. He wanted me to intervene since he’s Fereldan, I refused. He must have followed us here.” 

“Is that what he told you?” Athena asked as the gentleman in question turned to face them. Having her suspicions confirmed, she growled, “He’s lying.”

Athena got up and walked over to interrupt the conversation Josephine was having, “If you leave now, I will be merciful.”

“I will not be leaving. We are betrothed, and we will be wed before the night is through.” The dark haired man with cruel eyes smugly said. He looked to be about the same height as Athena.

“You know full well that I would never marry you, Kern.” Athena was visibly shaking with anger.

“This was decided by your father the day you were born.” Kern boasted. My finger was already itching to pull Bianca’s trigger.

"My parents gave up any right to decide my life when I was seven, by signing me over to the circle, and you know that. The First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander told you that on many occasions.” 

"Your Knight-Commander was a Mage lover, who ended up getting what he deserved.” Kern sneered.

“Are you finally admitting that you had a hand in his disappearance and the First-Enchanter’s murder?” Athena snarled. She had once told me that before she met us, they had been the only two people in the world to care for her.

Cullen, who had followed Athena to her destination in case he needed to intervene, advised, “Inquisitor, let’s take this elsewhere.”

“Yes, Commander.” 

Kern advanced on her, looking as though he wanted to harm Duchess and shouted, “I’m not going anywhere until she’s mine!”

Cullen forced Kern against the wall so fast that if you had blinked you would have missed it. Kern’s feet dangled above the floor with Curly being so much taller than him. He snarled, “You will do as I say.”

Keeping a firm grip on Kern, Cullen forced him to his office. Athena and Alistair followed behind.

Once the door was closed to Cullen’s office, Athena asked again, “Did you kill First Enchanter Lydia and Knight Commander Arthur?”

“Even if I did, it doesn’t change the fact that you belong to me.” Kern was smug. He was also certain he could break Cullen’s hold… He wasn’t succeeding.

"She belongs to no one save herself.” Cullen said softly to hide the menace in his voice.

“You harmed a child, murdered the First Enchanter, and continue to expect me to marry you? Not on your life!” Athena scoffed at him.

“I did all of that for your love,” Kern’s voice dripped with oily sweetness, still trying to break Curly’s iron grip.

“Hurting and killing those I love, attacking me,” Athena was livid and Cullen’s grip got excruciatingly painful for Kern upon hearing that Duchess had been attacked, “was a way to get me to love you?!” 

“Yes,” Kern winced in pain, “Can the Templar let me go now?”

"No, you’re too dangerous,” Athena refused.

Kern spat, “Stupid mage. I work for the Elder One now! And once we’re married so will you!”

“Inquisitor, what would you like to be done with him?" Cullen coolly questioned. After all, he wasn’t angry with her.

“Lock him up until his information can be verified.” Athena ordered.

“I’ll take him to the cells myself.” Cullen pushed the prisoner out of his office, keeping an iron grip on Kern’s arm so he wouldn’t run.

Athena took several deep breaths to calm herself. When she felt that she had control of her emotions again, Athena gave the King a shaky smile and inquired, “Your Majesty, would you like to walk with me back to the party?”

“Certainly, Inquisitor,” Alistair agreed, “How long have you known Kern?”

“Unfortunately, most of my life. Every time he would come around, bad things would happen.” Athena sighed despondently, her memories of Kern were far from fond.

“What are you going to do about his claims?” Alistair asked as he stopped her before they entered.

“I’m going to pass along his claims to Leliana and let her know where to find him.”

“He may not be able to talk after the Commander has his way,” Alistair muttered after Athena went in.

Athena told Leliana and Josephine what happened. Leliana disappeared to send out her agents and to talk to Kern. Athena finally had a second alone and Dorian and I ruined it by being nosy. I asked, “Where’s Curly?”

“Escorting a prisoner.” Athena said, not really paying attention to us.

“It was that bad?” Sparkler asked.

“Unfortunately, yes.” Athena was still distracted by whatever happened in Curly’s office and wondering why it would take so long for him to come back. She started to pace.

“I would love to tell her to enjoy the celebration… But I don’t think I’d be listened to.” Sparkler said trying and failing to get Athena’s attention.

“Athena, what happened?” I was worried for my friend.

“There are some things I will never be able to get away from,” Athena said softly, “ I promise I’ll tell you more later, Varric… He should be back by now.”

“If this guy has threatened to hurt you, or has hurt you in any way, it may take a while before the Commander comes back.” Dorian quietly stated.

“Why?” Athena asked, confused.

“Has no one ever defended you before?” I was shocked that she would be confused. Athena shook her head in response.

Dorian stood in front of where she was looking, so he could block her view, “Athena, go mingle a little. The Commander will be fine. If you get all the party niceties out of the way, maybe you can convince him to dance again.”

She half heartedly mingled, checking the door every couple minutes until Curly came in. Fortunately for me, I saw him first.

“Is he alive?” I asked once I was standing beside Cullen.

“Yes.” Cullen answered.

"Can he talk?”

“Barely.” Cullen watched Athena walk toward us.

“You were gone a while, did he say anything more?” Athena questioned.

“He wasn’t really in a talking mood. Let’s not talk anymore of him tonight. Why don’t we join the King and the Ambassador?” Curly took hold of Athena’s hand.

“You want to be around royalty?” Athena asked him, stunned.

“You are required to be around royalty, and as one of your advisers, so am I,” Cullen used his status as an excuse to be around the woman he cares for.

When they joined Alistair and Josephine, Alistair though it prudent to ask, “Since Kern is Fereldan, could you tell me exactly what he did, Inquisitor?”

“There was young girl that lived in the circle named Crystyna. She had been abandoned at the circle. When Kern came to the Circle, he was always cruel to Crystyna and I. The torment kept escalating for Crystyna and I stayed quiet until he slapped her in front of me, so I went to Knight-Commander Arthur and First Enchanter Lydia, and they told Kern that he was no longer welcome.

“A couple weeks later, the Knight-Commander had to go on a trip and the circle was attacked by Kern’s friends. Some of them were templars and they let Kern in. I searched for Crystyna, thinking that they would harm her. When I found Crystyna, she had been viciously beaten and left for dead. I tried to heal her, but her wounds were too extensive.

“When the First Enchanter found us, she helped me carry Crystyna back to my room. I kept trying to heal her, it was one of the few times I used lyrium, and I almost killed myself in the process. She died in agony.” Athena finished her heartbreaking tale with her violet eyes downcast. After a few shaky breaths to fight back tears, Duchess excused herself and left the hall to go to her quarters.

"She hides her hurts well, this one is too big, I can’t help her.” Cole whispered.

“Even if you could, she wouldn’t let you. She’s a healer too, Kid.” I whispered back.

The King’s face was grim as he spoke softly to Josephine, “Please inform the Inquisitor that if she does not want to face Kern again, I will make certain he pays for his crimes.”

Josephine nodded her assent and went to tell Leliana of all that Athena had told them.

Cullen followed Athena, fighting the urge to go down to the dungeon and break Kern’s face again. He heard Duchess softly sobbing and found her on the balcony, illuminated by moonlight. Cullen gently drew her into his arms, and held her until her sobs had quieted and her tears ran dry. Pulling away from Athena slightly, he asked, “Would you like to go for a walk?”

Athena nodded her assent and they left her quarters hand in hand. With the party dispersed, the main hall was quiet, and our lovers walked through without being stopped. They walked around the battlements quietly until reaching Cullen’s quarters. Comfortably ensconced there, Curly offered her a drink. Athena said yes and when he finished pouring, Cullen brought the drinks over and sat down beside her.

They drank and Cullen kissed her, for a very long time. It was sweet and gentle and had a note of reserved passion to it.  
As the kiss ended, they heard someone clear their throat. Cullen looked over his shoulder first, and said as he saw Nightingale, “No, not for a second night in a row.” 

“I’m not here for Athena, unless she wants to be a part of it.” Leliana explained.

“What’s it about?” Athena asked, finding it odd that Leliana didn’t want to include her.

“Kern.”

“I think I know more than enough about him. Cullen,” Athena paused, “do you want me to leave?”

“No. Leliana and I can talk elsewhere.” Cullen stood, “I’ll be back soon.” 

In answer Athena stretched out on the couch to get comfortable. Leliana and Curly had just closed the door to Cullen’s office when Athena fell asleep.

Leliana told him that the betrothal, if it wasn’t a complete fabrication, was a recent thing. After First Enchanter Lydia passed away, he tried to capture Athena, and that he is allied with Corypheus. Leliana asked, “How would you like to proceed?”

“By killing him.” Cullen growled.

“As much as I think Athena agrees with you, I don’t think she’ll approve.” Leliana hid a smirk.

“I know.” Cullen sighed in frustration, “it’s between her and Alistair. Kern is Fereldan, so the King would have a say.”

“I’ll talk to Alistair. Have a good night.” Leliana smiled and disappeared into the night.

When he came in, he found Athena almost falling off the couch, asleep. Cullen whispered, “At least it’s a peaceful sleep.” 

Cullen picked Athena up… The only way to get her to his bed was to climb a ladder to the upstairs. Curly winced at her soft oof as he put her over his shoulder and carried her to his bed. Gently laying her on top he pulled her long, brunette hair out of her face and covered her.

He slept fitfully (as usual) on the couch (not usual.) Cullen had to leave before Athena awoke, he left her a note, with breakfast, “Dear Athena, I’m sorry I couldn’t be here when you woke. I will see you soon. Be careful today. Your… Cullen”

Athena smiled while reading the note. After eating she realized she was still in her dress from last night, and said to the air, “Josie’s going to kill me.” 

She went back to the main hall to change and head out for the day. She ran in to Josephine and Leliana before she could change. 

“Inquisitor!” Josephine said and then gasped at the disheveled condition of Duchess’ dress, “… Your dress.”

“I’m sorry, I fell asleep in it.” Athena grimaced, looking down at it.

“It can be cleaned,” and then Ruffles murmured, “I hope.”

“I wish I could stay and talk…but there’s a dragon terrorizing the Hinterlands, and I have been asked to stop it.” Athena was about to start toward her quarters when Ruffles stopped her.

“Does the Commander know?”

“I knew there was something I forgot to tell him,” Athena groaned, a bit frustrated for forgetting to tell Cullen.

“Would you like us to inform him?” Leliana offered.

“He worries for you when you aren’t here,” Ruffles’ voice was low and conspiratorial.

“No, I’ll tell him when I return. What do you mean?” Athena asked, smiling.

“When he isn’t throwing himself into his work, he paces the battlements, almost as if he’s looking for you.” Leliana informed her with Josephine nodding wisely.

“The servants have been reporting that when you come back late, the Commander can be found pacing at the gate.” Josephine added.

Athena chuckled, “I would probably be much the same, or I’d send a shade to track him.”

Leliana and Ruffles laughed.

"It’s not easy on those that are left behind. Especially when love is involved.” Alistair announced his presence quietly, all three ladies looked at him, shocked, “it’s obvious he loves you, Athena. He may not have found the courage to say it yet, but it’s there.”

"Thank you," Athena said quietly, “I really must be going though, and I’m not wearing this!”

“Sweet Andraste, no! I’ll help you get out of it.” And with that Athena and Josephine disappeared in to Athena’s quarters.

Athena asked Cassandra, Dorian, and Bull to go with her to kill the dragon. To make a long fight short, they fought a high dragon and won, surprisingly with minimal injuries. Returning to Skyhold, they received the surprise of Curly not waiting for them.

“The greeter isn’t here,” Sparkler quipped.

“Be nice,” Athena chastised, trying not to grin.

“I am being nice. I could call him much more worse and disgusting things, but I like you and him, so I won’t.” Dorian said brightly.

“Come on, Dorian, let’s go get drinks.” Bull said.

“Have a good day, Inquisitor.” Sparkler walked off with Tiny.

Athena went to change out of her armor and wash before going to find Cullen. (Dragon guts aren’t very attractive, smelling or otherwise.) 

Curly was having a meeting and Athena snuck in the back trying to hide until the meeting was over. She was unsuccessful, Cullen smiled at her, she smiled back. He ended the meeting, followed those he dismissed and closed the door behind them. He braced his hands against it with his head down, “There’s always something more isn’t there?” 

“Long day?” Athena asked gently.

“I shouldn’t complain, but I have been thinking a lot about the future lately…” He moved away from the door and walked over to his desk, saying, “This war won’t last forever, and I find myself not wanting to move on… At least not from you.” Athena had followed him and he cupped the side of her face in his hand, “Do you… That is…”

Cullen had moved away from her to his desk to straighten papers. Athena stopped him by putting her body between Curly and the desk, “After all that we’ve been through, do you have to ask?” 

"I suppose not." Cullen smiled at Athena as she went to sit on his desk, knocking over a bottle. Athena gasped, Cullen shook his head, pushing everything off except Athena, and our lovers became lovers in a physical sense. (And now Sparkler actually won a bet. One of maybe three times betting against Duchess was actually profitable for him.) They made sweet, passionate love for most of the night.

Athena was getting dressed when Cullen started to have one of his nightmares, she laid a hand gently on his abdomen as he was calling out, “No, leave me.” And then he started awake.

“Bad dream?” Athena asked, concerned.

“They always are, without the lyrium, they’re worse.” Cullen exhaled, “I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“I have given you so much to worry about... Allow me to worry about you a little?” Athena requested. Cullen nodded his head in assent. Athena asked, “Is it still a good morning, despite the dreams?” 

“It’s perfect.” Cullen said softly, “I’ve never felt this way before.”

“I love you, Cullen, you know that right?” Athena shyly admitted her feelings to the one it impacted the most.

“I love you, too.” Cullen kissed Athena and laid back in bed, with a sigh of relief and a smile as Athena left. 

"Maybe I should call you Sparkler instead of Dorian." I said when Athena showed up in the main hall. She positively beamed. 

“No reason to change it, he still sparkles more than me.” Athena smiled.

“Your hurts are less. Commander Cullen is quieter now… I didn’t know you could do that!” Cole was about to go in more detail.

“Kid, stop.” I said, watching Athena blush.

“Did I do something wrong?” Cole asked.

“Not really wrong, but you were making available information that wasn’t really meant for public knowledge.” I explained as Athena looked for Josephine.

“Oh?” Cole thought more on it, “Oh! Should I apologize?"

“No,” I chuckled.

Athena found Ruffles, sitting behind her desk, in her office, “My, my aren’t we happy today?” 

“Shush!” Athena’s blush bloomed bright red.

Ruffles laughed, “I’m happy for you, Athena.”

“Thank you,” Athena smiled at her friend.

“What are you two giggling about?” Leliana asked.

“Nothing,” Athena answered too quickly, trying to avoid yet another person commenting on her “happiness”.

Leliana watched her and the blush crept in to Athena's cheeks to take on a full bloom. “Nothing, hm?”

“Leliana!” Josephine chastised her.

"What?! It’s obvious!” Leliana exclaimed.

“Really?” Athena asked in despair, she did not need the whole world knowing that she and the Commander 'made things official'.

“Only to those of us who have been rooting for you two to officially be together.” Josephine explained, to ease Duchess’ obvious discomfort.

“Oh no! He’s going to pace even more now!” Leliana exclaimed.

“Who’s going to pace more?” Curly asked as he walked into Josephine’s office. Nightingale and Ruffles started laughing. Athena blushed quite becomingly and Curly groaned. “Oh no…”

“No, no, she didn’t say a word. She just looked really happy and we guessed from there.” Josephine was quick to explain.

“I guess I’m going to have to tell all of Cullen’s admirers from the Winter Palace that he is formally off the market,” Leliana pretended to frown. She always enjoyed teasing Cullen. (In all honesty, who doesn’t?)

“I already told them that! What are they doing-“ Cullen growled, setting all three ladies to laughing, “I’m glad you ladies find such happiness in my misery.”

Athena went up and kissed him on the cheek, “You’re adorable when your flustered.”

“Awww," Ruffles and Nightingale gushed. Curly blushed, which sent those two to laughing again. 

“Can we get to work now, please?” Cullen sounded quite exasperated and impatient.

Leliana caught on to it and sighed dramatically, “I guess we should. The faster we get through our meeting the more time I will have working on those letters to Halamshiral.”

Cullen groaned at Nightingale’s teasing and took Athena’s hand as they walked in to the war room. Athena smiled at him.

The four of them discussed the next move, but considering it had Athena leaving for more than a day, Cullen wasn’t too keen on letting her leave, he had a surprise planned.

"It'll give me time to contact all of your admirers and get some rest from your pacing.” Leliana said, teasing Cullen.

“I do not-“ Cullen was about to defend himself when he saw Athena bite her lip to keep from laughing, “You knew? You told her?!” He accused Leliana and Josephine.

“It came up in conversation.” Leliana smiled serenely.

Curly shook his head, determined to not give them the satisfaction of seeing him become flustered again. He asked Athena, “Ready to go?”

“Where are we going?”

“I would like to discuss that in private.” Cullen was still miffed with Duchess' other advisers. Our lovers made for the door.

“Have fun you two,” Leliana and Ruffles called from behind the leaving pair.

When they were out of earshot of everyone, Cullen said, “I would like to take you somewhere. We have some business to attend to in Fereldan. Would you like to go?”

“Yes, when do we leave?”

“Do you have time now?”

“I do.” Curly smiled at Duchess’ answer and they left for Fereldan.

The business Curly had to attend to didn’t take long, and Cullen spent the day showing Athena the sights of where he grew up. At sunset, he took her to a lake, “This was my favorite spot as a child…”

“It’s so peaceful here.” Athena commented, leaning on Cullen as he wrapped his arms around her.

“I would come here to get away from the noise my sisters and brother would make. I love them, but they were always excited and loud.” Cullen enjoyed the feel of Athena in his arms.

“It sounds as though you have a very loving family.” Athena turned in his embrace to look up at him.

“I do…” Cullen sighed, “when this war is over, I would like you to meet them.”

“I would love that.” Athena smiled.

“Right before I left for the Templars, my brother gave me this.” He pulled a coin out of his pocket. “Templar rules forbid carrying anything from home as our faith should be enough to get us through.”

“You broke the rules?” Athena asked, not believing him.

“Up until a year ago, I was very good at following them, but I’m not a Templar anymore. You go into danger every day and I would like you to have it.” Curly handed her the coin.

“Thank you, I’ll keep it safe.” Athena assured him.

“Good,” Cullen paused, “I know it’s foolish but it… And you are important to me.” (Really Curly? You make love to her, tell Duchess you love her, and “important to me” is the best you got? Forgive my outburst, I return you to the tender scene.)

“Cullen…” Athena looked away. Not sure if she could give air to her fears.

“Yes?” Cullen wondered why she was hesitating so much.

“Do-“ Athena sighed and closed her eyes. She dreaded his answer, but needed to know, “Do you ever worry about being with me?”

“Why would I worry about being with you?”

“Because I’m a Mage.” Athena dared to look at him.

“Athena, have I given you a reason to distrust… Never mind, of course I have.” Cullen ran a hand through his hair, irritated with himself. He remembered his outburst after Athena aligned the Inquisition with the rebel Mages. 

“It’s just that magic has been used to hurt you, and it’s been the one thing to protect me, even, save me… Until you. I meant it when I said that I love you.” Athena said quietly, gazing into Cullen’s brown eyes.

Cullen crushed her in a hug and kissed her. When the kiss ended, his voice was soft and reassuring, “I do not worry about being with you. You use your magic for good, I cannot ask more of you than that. I love you, too.”

When Cullen finally released her, Athena sat down and pulled off her shoes. Astounded he asked, “What are you doing?”

“Going for a swim.” Athena pulled off her socks.

“Where did you learn to swim?”

“It was the one thing my parents made sure I knew how to do. We had a lake close to the house we stayed in during the winter and the summer house was on an island. I’ve known how to swim for as long as I can remember. Come with me?” Athena pulled off more clothing and slipped into the lake.

In answer, Curly pulled off his clothes and jumped in very close to Athena. She splashed him when he came up for air.

“I’m going to get you for that!” Curly reached out for her.

“No, you won’t!” Athena dove under the water and swam away. Cullen chased her and passion got the better of them to where they made love in the water. When our lovers finished, they got dressed and sat on the pier to watch the moon rise. Athena leaned against him and sighed a happy, contented sigh.

"Happy?" Cullen put his arm around her.

“I’m always happy when I’m with you.” Athena took hold of the hand that was dangling off of her shoulder. Cullen smiled and kissed the top of her head. “Are you happy, Cullen?”

“Yes, I never thought being this happy would be possible, especially now.” Cullen said quietly, thinking of all they still had to face. But loving each other made it seem like those odds weren’t so insurmountable anymore.

“I guess we should go back…” Athena trailed off, not really wanting to leave, ever… But, Corypheus was still out there, trying to destroy the world. 

"Just a couple minutes more.” Cullen said quietly. Athena smiled, happy that Cullen advised on more time to hide.


	12. Chapter 12

Once they got back to Skyhold life returned to abnormal, but Athena and Cullen were more relaxed and they would share secret smiles with each other remembering the day they shared in Fereldan. And then it was time for Athena to go to Emprise Du Lion.  
Right before we left, Curly pulled Athena to the side, “Be careful, please?”

“I will,” Athena said, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Cullen kissed her goodbye, and off we went.

In Emprise Du Lion we were gathering more information on where Samson was hiding, fighting red Templars, demons, and rescuing the townspeople of Sahrnia from torture and death… Fun stuff! Of course there was a great deal of teasing about our lovers.

“So, it’s love now?” Sparkler asked Athena, doing everything he could to get her to open up.

“Athena, where did you and Cullen go?” Cassandra asked, granting Duchess a reprieve from Dorian’s interrogation.

“We went to a lake by his childhood home. It was an incredibly nice break and with amazing company.”

All three of us gushed, getting Athena’s cheeks to a nice shade of pink.

“When is the wedding? Can I help plan it?” Sparkler was unashamed.

“Next time you and your lover have a moment, could you try not to light the curtains on fire?” Athena turned the tables on him.

“Who tells you these things?” Dorian questioned, exasperated.

“I do have eyes, Dorian, and most of the things I can’t see come from Leliana, but on this particular instance, I was asked by one of the maids if I did it.” Athena explained.

“I’m guessing she’s new,” Seeker chuckled as she had heard many instances of Sparkler losing some control.

“She had no idea who I was. When I told her she apologized profusely, got on her hands and knees, and kissed my feet…” Athena complained about the excess of attention.

“Did Curly walk in on you while this was happening?” I asked. I had heard a version of this story before.

“Yes… Why?” Athena’s voice was filled with dread.

“I was trying to convince him to play Wicked Grace again,” Athena smiled brightly. I continued, “and he had muttered something about having something on you that he’s not going to let you live down.” 

“Oh, Maker!” Athena put her head in her hands.

“Has my misery come to an end then?” Sparkler, you shouldn’t have brought the attention back on you.

“No,” The three of us said in unison.

"I didn’t try to burn down Skyhold.” Athena stuck her tongue out at Dorian.

“You used to be so nice and kind. I never thought the Commander would be a bad influence on you.” Dorian said melodramatically, “and I can’t help it that I’m passionate.”

“I’ve been around you and Varric too much. Are you saying that I’m not passionate?” Athena asked indignantly.

“Honored, Duchess,” I nodded my head with pride.

“No, Athena, I’m not. You have almost impossible control over your powers. Did you have that before the mark?” Dorian asked, admitting defeat in his way.

“With what I thought I knew of my past to be true, it became my mission to have firm control over my powers. I’ve always found it to be quite easy, once I was taught how. It probably means my powers are very weak, but they work for me, and I don’t have to use lyrium or anything to keep them in check or make them stronger.”

"You don't have to use lyrium?!" Seeker and Sparkler asked.

“No, is that odd?”

“Very,” they answered in unison.

“Your powers are not weak, they are incredibly strong. For a healing mage to be able to do what you do, it is extraordinary.” Dorian was appreciative.

"Thank you... I think?” Athena was not sure what to make of it.

“Suffice it to say, unless you will it, you will not be setting any curtains on fire.” Dorian said.

“Good, because I like my curtains.” Athena smiled at him.

“Ha ha.” Dorian grumbled, thinking about how much he had paid for his plaid curtains. He thought they were atrocious, but his lover (the one he told no one about until much later) liked them, and as they say, anything for love.

**

After several days we returned to Skyhold from Emprise Du Lion. Since it was the middle of the day, there wasn’t anyone to greet the Inquisitor and Dorian teased, “Aww, no one to greet Athena.”

Athena blushed and snuck into the main hall and up to her quarters to take a bath. Without anyone (except maybe Nightingale) being the wiser. She was still soaking in the tub when Curly came to find her. He knocked loudly and called out, “Athena?”

She started awake, and called back that she was in her quarters. Athena briefly wondered if she should get out of the tub, but decided against it. It was only Cullen, and he’s already seen her naked.

"There you are!” Cullen said, and then noticed that she was still in the bath, “Should I come back?”

She turned in the tub so she could see him, “Really, Cullen?”

Curly chuckled, “I guess that would be silly wouldn’t it?” Athena nodded, “When did you get back?” 

“A while ago.” Athena remarked as she stepped out of the tub and grabbed her towel.

“You fell asleep?” Cullen asked. Athena nodded sheepishly in answer. “Don’t you sleep when you’re out traveling?”

“I try to, but it’s not the same. It was better this time around.” She put on a dress that matched her violet eyes.

“Why was it better?” Cullen wondered why this time had been a better sleep than before. Especially since he had worried more for her.

“Have you forgotten already?” Athena asked. Cullen didn’t hear her, his mind was on… other things (like watching her get dressed and wanting to stop her.) “Cullen?”

Startled out of his reverie, “Yes?”

“Where were you?” Athena asked, bemused.

“Nowhere.” Curly responded as he blushed, getting Athena to laugh.

"The coin you gave me helped me sleep better. I felt as though…” Athena paused, blushing, “I had a piece of you with me.”

“Good.” Curly walked over to her to hold her hand. He leaned down and gently kissed her. When the kiss ended, Cullen asked, “What would you like to do?”

“Get work out of the way.”

“Understood,” Curly said and they made their way to the war room.

"You're back!" Ruffles exclaimed, "Successful I hope?"

"Very." Athena handed several letters to Cullen, “We found these in relation to Samson. We recruited Michel de Chevin, and stopped the Red Templars. They were using the villagers of Sahrnia to mine red lyrium, and then they would feed some of it to them, they tortured so many.”

"They won't be able to anymore, thanks to you." Leliana said quietly.

“What should be our next move?” Josephine asked.

“We find Samson.” Athena and Cullen said in unison.

Leliana shook her head, “Cute.”

Our lovers left the war room and went in to the main hall and saw me, Tiny, Kid, and Sparkler talking. Athena waved at us. Curly asked, “Did you want to join them?”

“Not tonight.” Athena smiled up at him.

We, of course, heard, and Sparkler couldn’t resist, “There was a time when all she wanted to do was spend time with us," he sniffed. "Do you remember that, Varric?”

“No.” I chuckled, “I’m just glad Duchess was able to find Curly a hobby.”

Athena turned on Dorian, hearing him, “Don’t catch the curtains on fire again or your room will be encased in metal.”

“That happened weeks ago.” Dorian said sheepishly.

“No, it didn’t.” Athena smugly spoke.

“How…?” Dorian paused, at a complete and utter loss to speak (he still hasn’t lived that one down.) “You just-”

“I needed help in getting bath water and one of the maids rushed in screaming that your quarters was on fire." Athena explained. She was enjoying watching Sparkler squirm.

“Wait…What?” Curly wondered what he had missed while training the soldiers.

The Kid and I were laughing so hard we could barely catch our breath.

Athena chuckled, “I’ll explain it later. Dorian?”

“Yes, madam?” Dorian asked grumpily. He thought news travelled fast in Tevinter, in Skyhold one couldn’t turn around without another knowing it.

“Behave.” Athena warned.

"Athena," I was gasping for breath, “see if you can convince Curly to play another game of Wicked Grace.”

“I’ll try.” She said and then to Cullen, “Ready to go?”

“Yes.” Curly answered and they left, anxious to have his lady love all to himself.

“He’s so much quieter now. She heals him without using magic or taking away the pain. How?” Cole questioned, wondering if he could employ the method when he takes away other people’s pain.

“It’s called love, Kid.” I explained quietly.

**

The walk to Curly’s quarters was quiet with them holding hands except for the various and sundry people greeting them as “Inquisitor” and “Commander”. When they were on the stairs to the battlements, Cullen thought to ask, “Did you want to spend some time in your quarters?”

“It’s a bit late for that isn’t it?” Athena chuckled. They were closer to his quarters than they were hers.

Curly chuckled, but inwardly breathed a sigh of relief, “I guess it is.”

Before they went in Cullen stopped, causing Athena to stop. She looked up at him and waited patiently. It was obvious to her that something was on his mind. Cullen sighed, working up to what he really wanted to say, “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” Athena smiled.

“When you’re out there, I worry if you’re hurt, if you’re coming back.” Cullen wanted her to know how much she meant to him.

“Cullen…” Athena started.

“Shh… Let me finish.” Cullen placed a finger on her lips, “and then I remember the many occasions where you should have been hurt and weren’t. But the feeling that I should be out there with you is ever present.”

Athena reached up and pulled his head down to hers and whispered, “I love you,” before she kissed him. After the kiss ended they went inside where a surprise was waiting for her. Athena took in the romantically candle lit office, “Did you know about this?”

“I told Josephine that I wanted to do something special for your return, and this was the result.” 

There was a candle light dinner, the place was spotless, and there were more surprises waiting upstairs for Duchess to discover later. Looking around, Athena said, “It’s lovely. Thank you.”

“I didn’t do anything,” Cullen said, confused.

“You had the idea,” Athena beamed.

“Yes… well,” Cullen coughed, embarrassed, but happy she was pleased. “Are you going to tell me about Dorian lighting his curtains on fire?”

Athena laughed at the blatant attempt to change the subject as she sat down across from Cullen, “Dorian has been seeing someone. And Dorian… At times… Loses a little control.”

Cullen closed his eyes and shook his head in disbelief. He knew all mage powers were not created equal, but Athena was a very powerful mage in her own right and he was curious, “Why don’t you?”

“Fire’s never been my thing,” Athena teased.

"Ha ha," Cullen snarked back, he supposed he deserved that.

“When my parents sent me to the Circle, I cried every night for months. First Enchanter Lydia took notice and asked why. I explained to her what I believed to have happened, and she taught me a way to never lose control. I practiced it so often that I don’t even think about it anymore, it’s as much a part of me as healing is…” Athena paused and looked away, “When she taught it to me, I swore to her that I would never hurt another living thing as long as I lived. She smiled sadly at me and told me not to, that I may need to use my powers to protect myself some day- I miss her.”

Cullen took her hand and squeezed it, drawing her attention back to him, “Did you want to look into her death?”

“I know what happened to her. Kern murdered her. Finding proof on the other hand…” Athena trailed off and sighed. This was not a topic she wanted to discuss tonight, “I don’t want to talk or think about him tonight. Especially when I have the most sought after man in the Winter Palace in front of me.”

Cullen coughed and rejoined, “At least I don’t have people kissing my feet.” 

Athena gasped and threw her napkin at him, “I’m sure some of your admirers would have, had you not been in public. I mean, they were brave enough to pinch your bottom in public.”

Cullen pulled Athena’s napkin from his face and growled at her. Athena squeaked and ran from the table, Curly gave chase and caught her very quickly, backing her up against the wall, “I guess we won’t be playing Wicked Grace tonight,” Athena said softly before Cullen kissed her and the desk was once again used for undesk like things.

**

As the sun rose over the mountains, it greeted rose petals strewn across Cullen’s bedroom floor… They were once on the bed. The candles now burned down to nothing. Athena was laying on Cullen’s chest listening to the gentle thumping of his heart. And then the nightmares started. Athena shifted and whispered in his ear, “Shh, it’s just a dream. You’re no longer there. I love you.”

Cullen stilled and his breathing eased. He woke up slowly instead of being startled awake, “What did you do?”

“What do you mean?” Athena asked, sitting up. That was not the greeting she had been expecting.

“I heard you.” 

Athena smiled, “I was whispering in your ear.”

“No magic?” He asked, still in a sleep haze.

Athena looked away, a little hurt, “I wouldn’t do that to you.” She paused, knowing that he’s never really seen what she could do, “It’s not in my skill set to take away night terrors. I sometimes have more than I bargain for with healing.”

“What do you mean?” Cullen was fully awake now with her confession.

“Some injuries I have to take into myself for a bit before I can heal them properly.” 

“Maker…” Cullen breathed, “You’re not out there healing others are you?”

Athena chuckled softly, “I’m usually pretty good about knowing my limits…” she trailed off.

“Crystyna,” Cullen finished for her.

Athena nodded her head, “Up to that point, I had never touched or saw any reason to use lyrium for magic. But, I was desperate. I knew how much pain she was in because I had taken in some of her injuries. So, I used way too much and tried to heal her. I was half way through when Lydia found and stopped me. I was so sick and weak for so long… Lydia said that Arthur was trying to have me moved to another circle, and that was why he wasn’t at Ostwick. Then the circles fell, Lydia died, and with no word from my parents, I figured I’d go to Haven and see if I could help stop the war.”

"And you haven’t used lyrium since.” Cullen remembered their conversation from earlier.

“No, I don’t need it, and honestly, I’m afraid to,” Athena shrugged her shoulders helplessly.

“Oh, Athena,” Cullen sat up and hugged her, “I’m so sorry if I hurt you earlier.”

"It's okay. With our stolen moments, I have to remind myself that you’ve never really seen me use magic.”

“You are amazing.” Cullen said softly, cupping her face in one of his hands… And then someone came barreling through the door yelling, “Commander Cullen!”

Cullen growled, got up, started to get dressed, as Athena laid back down on the bed, she whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he said softly, and then yelled, “I’ll be right down!” Cullen looked back at Athena after he was dressed, “coming?”

“Nope. At least, not yet,” Athena smiled unrepentantly at him.

“Great, you get to take your time and I have to rush off,” Cullen grumbled, irritated that the one morning Athena didn’t have to rush anywhere was being ruined. 

Athena laughed at him and mouthed for him to go.

When Cullen got down to his office, the agent who burst in was still catching their breath, “Calm down,” Cullen waited until the poor guy could catch a breath, “What's your name soldier?”

“Ser Dusty, Leliana wanted me to inform you and the Inquisitor that Warden Blackwall is missing. Would you happen to know where she is?”

“I do, I’ll pass along the message to her. Thank you, Ser Dusty.” Cullen walked the young man to do the door.

"It sounds as though I don't get to relax today, after all.” Athena came down the ladder, fully dressed in a red velvet shirt, leather vest, and buff breeches.

“You heard?” 

Athena nodded, “I would like to think he’s drunk under one of the tavern’s tables, but that’s more Sera’s style.”

“Hopefully, he can be found quickly and he’s still alive. You don’t think it was Corypheus mimicking the calling for Grey Wardens?” Cullen asked.

“I don’t know if he hears it…” Athena trailed off, a look of consternation on her face.

“How is that possible?” Cullen wondered, more as a rhetorical question.

"When I asked him if he heard the calling, he said he was fine and would never betray the Inquisition. My issue is that Stroud said every Grey Warden heard it.” Athena wasn’t sure who or what to believe.

"Odd..." Cullen said, "be careful?”

"I will. I love you,” Athena stood on tip toe to kiss him.

Athena went to Blackwall’s quarters first, hoping there was some evidence of where he was headed. One of Leliana’s scouts met her there and handed her the report they found. She quickly read it, “Val Royeaux and Mornay’s execution?”

The scout just shrugged his shoulders and left. Athena said to the air, “I guess I’m going to Val Royeaux… I really wish it was with Leliana and Josie to go shopping.”

Joining us in the main hall, Athena told Sparkler, Bull, and I, “Warden Blackwall is missing. It appears he’s gone to Val Royeaux to attend someone named Mornay’s execution. We need to go.”

**

Val Royeaux was a shining city with alabaster walls and golden spires. The shine had lost its luster this day, an overcast sky hid the sun. When we reached the gallows, Blackwall got up on them to stop the hanging of Mornay, saying that Mornay was just a soldier following his Commander’s orders. Athena called out to him, “Warden Blackwall!”

“That’s not my name, my name is Thom Rainier and I was Mornay’s commanding officer. The crime is mine.” Blackwall/Rainier said, and was promptly taken to jail. 

Athena looked at us with the haunted look of someone betrayed. She closed her eyes in effort to shake off her dark thoughts. Sighing, she steeled herself and asked one of the guards for directions to the prison.

Entering the prison, she made her way down to Rainier’s cell and talked with him. Rainier told her the story of how the massacre happened and how he ran. He told Athena how he met the real warden Blackwall, and how the real one died. Rainier then assumed Blackwall’s name, never fully becoming a warden, claiming that it was so a good man could live. 

He also accused Athena of being like him. Athena told him, “I have never lied to you, or anyone that travels with me. I also have never lied to those that fight for the Inquisition, and I pray to the Maker that I never will.”

“What about your Commander?” Blackwall spat, taking his anger at himself out on Duchess.

“Don’t you dare!” Athena whispered fiercely. She wanted to defend Cullen, but she knew it would get her nowhere.

“I am sorry, Inquisitor, leave me to the fate I deserve.” Blackwall/Rainier slumped against the bars of his cell.

Athena left him to find that Curly was waiting for her in the jailer’s office. Athena said wearily, “Hello.”

Cullen smiled sadly at her. He wished he could tell her that everything would be all right, but he couldn’t, “Here is Leliana’s report.”

Athena scanned it quickly, “Everything Blackwall told me is true.”

“It would appear so." Cullen said, “You can have him brought back for judging by the Inquisition.”

Athena closed her eyes and leaned back against the wall of bars, “What would you do?”

“For what he did in the past and to his men, I despise him for it and he deserves to be punished. But he has also been incredibly helpful with the Warden alliance and with the Inquisition forces. I don’t understand why, once he is finally free of his past, he would bring it to the present and with such consequences.”

Athena opened violet eyes that were filled with hurt and betrayal, “He says he admitted to it because I inspire him… and in the next breath he said I was the same as him.”

Cullen’s face closed off so Athena wouldn’t see the blinding anger he was feeling toward Rainier for saying Athena was the same, “What do you want to do?”

Athena sighed heavily, "I'm going to regret this… but I can’t let him die here. Get him out.”

“I’ll see you back at Skyhold,” Cullen said as he left. 

She returned to us, with tear streaked cheeks, and Bull asked, “You all right, Boss?”

Athena nodded but didn’t look any of us in the eye. If I hadn’t been so worried about Duchess, Bianca and I would have had a decidedly unpleasant conversation with the man formerly known as Blackwall.

We mounted up and rode silently. I rarely saw Duchess looking like she was ready to break. Hell, not even Corypheus could dim the light in her, but today, she looked ready to break. I’d be willing to bet that she was severely questioning her judgement in picking allies, and possibly, even friends.

About an hour later, we saw the beginnings of a camp, and a rider in Templar armor… Lion helmet and all riding toward us. (Come on, Curly! A lion? It’s Dragon Age, not Lion Age!)

As Cullen caught up to us, Athena sat straighter on her horse, and the beginnings of a smile played at the corners of her mouth. He took off his helmet, and breathless from the ride, spoke, “I thought it would be safer if we went back to Skyhold together.”

“Thank you… Commander,” Athena’s cheeks were tinged with pink.

Sparkler and I looked at each other and grinned. Dorian crowed, “You’re among friends here, you can drop the formalities.” He paused and winked at her, “I hope he’s as good as he looks.”

“Dorian!” The pink turned into a very rosy color and tinged her entire face. Cullen shot Sparkler a quelling look and set his horse to Athena’s pace and we rode to the quickly set up camp.

With the horses in capable hands, our lovers sought a tent for privacy. Cullen watched Athena nervously pace for several minutes, giving her the space she needed to think. He heard Duchess sigh despondently and she came to stop in front of him. Cullen smiled sadly at her, “Do you want to talk?”

Athena shook her head. She wrapped her arms around Cullen’s waist, and held on to him as she sobbed. When the sobs quieted, Athena whispered, “He ordered his men to kill for money. They killed children, innocents- I’ve ordered people to kill, am I the same as him?”

“Maker’s breath!” Cullen gently unwrapped her arms and slightly tugged on her hands to pull her to sit on a cot, “I have never heard you give an order to kill for anything other than in defense of the defenseless or survival. Athena, look at me,” Cullen paused until her tear filled eyes meet his warm brown ones, “You are nothing like Black… Rainier… That man. You have helped so many.”

Athena glanced away from Cullen’s direct but tender gaze. He could see that she was still doubting herself. Cullen gently tipped her chin to look at him again, “You kept Leliana from killing other people because you felt it wasn’t right. Someone that keeps their spymaster from killing would never order such an atrocious crime for monetary gain.”

“Are you certain?”

“I am, and even if you were to make a rash decision or one that would harm innocents, you’ve surrounded yourself with people that would stop you. That is what makes you a great leader.” Cullen’s voice softened and he caressed her cheek. 

“I chose him as an ally,” Athena reminded him, and chastised herself.

“And he lied about who he was. Even Leliana had no idea that he was this Thom Rainier until he disappeared. He betrayed your trust.”

“How many more are lying to us, Cullen? What does this mean for the Inquisition? How do we defeat Corypheus if we can’t even trust our own people?” It sounded to Cullen like his lady love was having a major crisis of conscience. He understood, all too well.

“We cannot prevent people from lying to us. When the lie or misdeed is found out, we confront it openly and honestly. It’s all we can do.” Cullen assured her.

“I love you,” Athena rested her head on his chest, listening to the steady thrum of his heart.

“I love you, too.” Cullen wrapped her in his warm embrace.


	13. Chapter 13

“Is Athena okay?” Leliana asked as she closed the door to Cullen’s office. It had been a few days and it seemed like Athena was avoiding talking about what happened in Val Royeaux. Leliana was concerned.

Cullen put down the papers he was reading, “She was lied to and feels betrayed, but she is handling it.” 

“I know how much she loves children, and to hear that an ally she chose, ran from justice instead of facing the deaths he caused…” Leliana was used to a lot of nasty stuff, but this didn’t even enter into her darkest imaginings.

“You’re bothered by it, too,” Cullen stated, surprised to see Leliana showing a vulnerable side.

“I am. That goes no further than this room. Has she been keeping confidence with you? Our schedules have been completely opposite since you two came back from Val Royeaux,” Leliana pried.

“She has. She’ll be fine, Leliana. Athena is an incredibly strong woman.” 

“I know. Athena has a gentle heart, I would hate to see it become jaded over this.”

Cullen chuckled softly, and teased, “I’ll let her know that you’re worried.”

“I am showing concern for a friend, nothing more,” Nightingale, always having to act tough. As she left, she tossed behind her, “I have work to do.”

**

Athena made it official that she wanted to get Blackwall out and judge him herself. After they left the war room, Athena asked, “Would it bother you to go to my quarters tonight?”

“Not at all. Are you tired?” Cullen asked.

“Very,” Athena sighed. They walked quietly up the stairs and once they were seated comfortably in front of the fireplace after Curly got a nice warm fire going, Athena questioned herself, “Am I doing the right thing? The things he said. The things he did…”

Cullen sat beside her, confused, “Maybe you should start from the beginning.”

“I can’t get the end of our conversation out of my head. He compared me to him, even though I’m this inspiration for him to own up to his past. And then he said that you were like him too, and I saw red… I wanted to hurt him. I’m hoping he said those things so I would leave him there, but I don’t know what to believe with him anymore. I always thought he was honest and loyal…” Athena trailed off, trying not to cry again.

Cullen shook his head, not understanding Blackwall/Rainier’s game, “We all trusted him, you have every right to feel betrayed. When he gets back to Skyhold, I’m going to have a talk with him.”

“Why?” 

“To see if I can get the truth from him.” Cullen paused, “ No more talk of Rainier tonight. Can you tell me more of this way to control your powers without using lyrium?”

“Well, it’s something Lydia called a “release.” It’s a forcing out of pent up magical energy. Since she taught it to me, I’ve done it on a daily basis, some days several times a day. Now they just kind of… Happen without me thinking about them, and someone close to me will feel a slight breeze.”

"What happens if that energy isn’t released?” 

“My magic will become more powerful, and somewhat uncontrollable.” Athena searched Cullen’s eyes, worried that he would fear her.

“That sounds like the voice of experience.” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“It’s only happened once, when Kern tried to make me a captive.” After a couple minutes of silence Athena said, “You’re worried…”

“Am I that easy to read?” Cullen chuckled nervously, “What happened when you lost control? Is it safe for you?” 

"I threw everyone away from me. I don’t think she would have taught it to me if it wasn’t… Knight-Commander Arthur assisted in teaching it to me.” Athena got up from the couch and grabbed a book from beside her bed, “This is all I have of Lydia, it’s her journal. It details everything she taught me. It’s yours if you want it.”

“Athena… No,” Cullen said, “I’m sorry for all the questions. I’ve just never heard of this before, and to hear that a Templar helped in teaching it to you- I’m just- Shocked.”

“Maybe you’ll be able to explain some of the things she wrote about. A lot of it is like it’s in a different language.” Athena shrugged, sitting back down beside him.

“Are you sure?” Cullen fingered the book she placed in his lap, his thoughts unreadable.

“I am…” Athena paused, “Cullen, I don’t want to keep secrets from you. I understand why parts of me scare you, the truth is, they scare me too. But I don’t want to lose me, my hopes, my dreams, by becoming tranquil.”

“Athena, I never-” Cullen was interrupted.

“I know you didn’t, but it’s a thought that crosses my mind every single day.”

He shook his head, partially blaming Templars for the deep seeded doubts Athena had about herself. Then he kissed her. After the tender kiss ended, Cullen picked Athena up and carried her to the bed. Lydia’s journal ended up, forgotten, on the floor for the night.

**

Athena was startled awake from a nightmare. Glancing over at her lover and saw that for once, Curly was sleeping peacefully. Athena smiled ruefully and gingerly got out of bed so she wouldn’t disturb him. Putting on a robe she walked out to the balcony, closed her eyes, and let the wind take away the emotions of the dream. 

Several minutes later, Cullen rolled over and noticed Athena wasn’t in bed. When he sat up, he saw that she was on the balcony. He followed her outside and quietly teased, “I thought I was the one that couldn’t get a decent night’s sleep.”

Athena jumped, startled by his voice and turned away from the mountain view, shrouded in darkness. She could still feel the dream clawing at her consciousness, so she stood there, not saying anything. 

Cullen walked over to her and put his arms around her. Athena still held herself rigid. Cullen didn’t say a word or move (even though he was freezing, being only in his underclothes…) until he felt Athena relax, then he whispered, “Come inside.” 

He let go to take her hands, and gently pull her inside. Cullen had Athena sit on the couch, grabbed a blanket from off the bed, sat beside her, and covered the both of them with the blanket, and he waited (the man has the patience of one of Andraste’s rumored guardians.)

“I’m sorry,” Athena whispered as she curled beside him.

“For what?” That was the last thing Curly expected to hear.

"For disturbing your sleep. You were sleeping so peacefully…” Athena trailed off.

“But you weren’t,” Cullen finished for her.

Athena sighed, still trying to shake off the vestiges of her nightmare, “It was a horrible dream.”

“I have some experience with those,” Cullen grinned crookedly.

“Ha ha,” Athena said fighting a smile, and losing.

“There’s the smile I love to see,” Curly paused, “Did you want to talk about it?”

Athena shook her head, "I don’t know… Or want to know, what I would do without you.”

“I feel the same,” Cullen kissed her.

Athena stood up, not letting go of Curly’s hand, “let’s go back to bed.”

Cullen smiled and stood with her. Unfortunately going back to bed wasn’t an option for our lovers. Before they reached the bed they heard shouts of, “Inquisitor!” And “Your Worship!” And “there’s a fire!”

Athena groaned, “Not again Dorian!”

Cullen chuckled, “Let's go see what the fuss is about,” he paused, “after we get dressed.”

“Yes, I think you’d get more admirers than I could fend off this time.” Athena teased.

Cullen growled in response and they both got dressed. Athena chuckled the entire time.

Once they got down to the main hall, the first person they saw was Dorian, “Oh no, it wasn’t me this time. I was no where near the infirmary.”

“The infirmary?” Athena became alarmed. Dorian nodded and Athena and Cullen took off at a run. Reaching the infirmary, they met up with Ruffles and Nightingale.

“Is everyone okay?” Athena asked Leliana as Josephine was talking to the surgeon.

"There were a few minor burns, some broken bones, and a lot of bruising, but between the mages and surgeons, I think everyone’s taken care of.” Leliana said.

“How did this happen?” Cullen surveyed the makeshift infirmary.

“An experiment.” Leliana answered.

“What kind of experiment?” Athena wondered what kind of experiment would cause such panic.

“A medical one, according to the surgeon,” Josephine joined the conversation.

“What kind of medical experiments cause fires?” Athena wondered, looking over the chaos.

“It didn’t start out that way, there was an explosion first.” Leliana said, “I’m surprised you didn’t feel or hear anything.”

"Not until people started calling for me." Athena said, "Who was experimenting? What were they experimenting on, or with?”

"The surgeon said it was one of her apprentices, and that he used too much embrum and pyrophite.” Josephine said.

“They’ve done this before then.” Cullen wondered how often and why this time was so different.

“The surgeon said it was the tenth experiment this week.” Josephine answered Curly’s unasked question.

“What was the experiment supposed to accomplish?” Leliana asked.

“I couldn’t get a straight answer on that,” Josephine was still miffed at the surgeon.

Athena didn't hear Josephine's answer as she saw a little boy laying on a cot and went over to him. She said quietly so she wouldn’t startle the boy, “Hi, what’s your name?”

He looked in the direction of her voice and Athena was shocked to see that his eyes were unfocused and filmy. She wondered if he could see, “My name is Tommy. My arms hurt and I don’t know why.”

“My name is Athena, it’s nice to meet you Tommy. I’m going to look at your arms to see if there’s something I can do to help. It may hurt a little, and I’m sorry for that. Where are your parents?” Athena gingerly moved and lifted up Tommy’s shirt sleeves and arms.

“They left me.” Tommy said and Athena’s heart broke.

“Tommy, the good news is that your arms aren’t burned, but you must have fallen. They’re broken. I’m going to heal them. What I need you to do is focus on your most favorite thing in the world to do, and tell me all about it, okay?” Athena’s voice was calm and reassuring. 

“My favorite thing is listening to Mother Giselle talk about the Herald of Andraste. Her voice is so kind and the stories of how nice and caring the Herald is make me happy.” Tommy moved his head back to stare, unseeing, at the lightening sky.

While Tommy was talking Athena looked closely at his eyes, he didn’t move or flinch away from her and they were almost nose to nose. She found it odd that they looked to be coated in oil. It also looked as though ash had found its way in. As she warmed up her magic she continued to talk to the little boy, “You’re going to feel pressure and warmth on your arms. Tell me your favorite story, please?”

“My favorite one takes place in Haven, where we were before my parents left me,” Athena closed her eyes, willing away the what if his parents died at Haven instead of abandoning him. She needed to focus on healing the little boy, “The Herald had found a sick nug and instead of killing it, she healed it and brought it back.” Athena placed her hands right above Tommy’s arms and a warm glow filled the space between while Tommy talked, “and then she gave it to Sister Leliana as a present, all because she knew it would make Sister Leliana happy. I hope to meet the Herald one day.”

Athena gently pulled down Tommy’s sleeves, “Do your arms still hurt, Tommy?”

Tommy moved them around, “They feel all better, thank you,” he sat up and hugged her.

“You’re welcome,” Athena fought to not cry in front of the little boy. She also felt quite weak.

“You are a wonder,” Mother Giselle said from behind her.

“I do what I can,” Athena said quietly, disappointed that her magic hadn’t healed the boy’s eyes. Tommy released her from his hug, she asked, “Tommy, does anything else hurt?”

"I'm hungry," Tommy said.

Mother Giselle and Athena laughed. Mother Giselle took Tommy’s hand, “I can help you with that, little one. I hope you have a good day, healer.”

Athena smiled at her, so she knew she was grateful. As Tommy and Mother Giselle left, Athena sat weakly on Tommy’s former cot and closed her burning eyes. She thought it was just from the tears she was trying to hold in check.

While the previous was going on, Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen did not say a single word, transfixed by their leader. Once the spell was broken, Cullen started to ask, “You'll…”

“Join us when you and the Inquisitor are able.” Leliana interrupted as she and Josephine left to find this apprentice. 

Cullen walked over to Athena and sat on the cot opposite her (the one she was sitting on was a bit small for both of them.) He whispered, “Athena?”

She opened her tear filled and burning eyes to look at him, “He was blind and his parents left him alone in Haven.”

“Are you injured?” Cullen was more worried for her than Tommy at the moment.

She half heartedly smiled, “My eyes are burning a bit, but I’ve also been fighting tears. I feel a little weak, but that’s normal for when I have to heal severe injuries."

He gently held her face, and kissed her. The kiss lasted for a very long time with onlookers chuckling. Once the kiss ended, Curly asked softly, “Are you okay to stand?”

Athena smiled at him through her tears (because they wouldn’t stop, no matter how much she willed it,) “Yes. Healing him didn’t hurt me… Much.” (She added when she got a stern look from Curly.)

"Why are you crying?" He asked as they stood. Cullen quickly wrapped an arm around Athena as she seemed off balance.

“Because he shouldn’t have been hurt at all. His parents shouldn’t have abandoned him, and he likes me without knowing me.” Athena hoped the tears would stop now that she said what she was thinking. The tears eased but the slight burning remained. She found it cruel that she had to suffer the consequences if her magic wasn’t going to fully heal Tommy. 

“Should we go see what Leliana found out?”

“Yes.”

As they walked in to the main hall, they saw Mother Giselle and Tommy sitting at a table eating, they over heard Tommy ask, “Mother Giselle, can I have a brownie, please?”

“How do you know that there are brownies?” Mother Giselle asked.

“I see them,” Tommy smiled at her. Delighted that he could see again.

“Where?” Mother Giselle was shocked and amazed. The boy had been blind for months, and no one had been able to help him.

Tommy pointed right at the brownies, “There.”

Cullen whispered, awed, “Did you…?”

Athena nodded and whispered back, “When he didn’t say anything about being able to see again, I thought that I had failed.”

“But you didn’t know what was wrong with his eyes,” Cullen whispered again.

“His eyes had an oily film to them and I could see a lot of ash from the fire. I just guessed it was something that could be made better with magic. Please understand, I had to try.” Athena whispered back.

Cullen hugged her and whispered, "I understand, Athena, I do.”

Mother Giselle looked at the couple. She cocked her head to see if Athena wanted to meet Tommy now. Athena shook her head and mouthed, “Not right now. Let him have his brownie.”

On their way to Josephine’s office, they heard Mother Giselle say, “Tommy, your healer is an amazing lady, some would even say, sent by Andraste herself.”

Tommy happily bit into a brownie.

**

Leliana and Cassandra were waiting for them in Josephine’s office. Leliana asked Athena, “How are you?”

“I’m fine, thank you for asking.”

“Leliana asked me to interrogate the apprentice. Do you want to be there? They can get… Brutal,” Cassandra said.

“I remember,” Athena said quietly, “and yes, I need to be there.”

“Commander?” Cassandra asked.

“I have some questions I need to ask him as well,” Curly’s clipped tones revealed that he had a tight leash on his anger.

“It sounds as though I won’t be needed. I wanted to talk to the surgeon anyway.” Leliana said.

Seeker was right, the interrogation got brutal fast, especially with the apprentice’s hatred of mages. Curly did not take kindly to the apprentice dumping all that hate on Athena. It quickly became apparent that the apprentice knew exactly what he was doing, he was trying to sabotage the Inquisition… he worked for Kern, (until King Alistair locked Kern away and conveniently lost the key,) and was trying to prove himself so he could work for Corypheus. 

Cassandra dismissed our lovers while she locked up the prisoner. Once outside the dungeon, Athena leaned against the wall, “Cassandra was more brutal than I remember. And I am incredibly grateful that you weren’t a part of my interrogation.”

“I should take that as a compliment?” Curly asked.

“Yes, can we go back to the lake?”

Cullen smiled sadly at her, “Once this is all over, we’ll go for a week.”

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Athena smiled.

“I always make good on my promises.” Cullen kissed her, deeply.

Our lovers walked back to the main hall, where Tommy was thrilling everyone with his excitement over seeing again. Watching Athena watch Tommy, Cullen whispered in her ear, “Why don’t we go say hello?”

“Why would we?” Athena was shocked by his question.

“Have you never been thanked for healing someone?” Cullen was just as shocked. Athena shook her head. “That changes today,” Cullen pulled her along by the hand and walked over to the table Mother Giselle and Tommy were sitting.

“Ah, you’ve come back,” Mother Giselle smiled. Reading Curly’s nod correctly, she continued, “Tommy, there’s someone that I want to introduce you to.” 

Tommy stopped making faces in a silver tray and waited. Mother Giselle stood, “The lady that healed your arms and eyes,” she paused to get a confirmation. Curly nodded again, “is here, and I believe she would like to formally meet you.” 

Athena had to be nudged by Cullen to move, but once she saw Tommy’s smiling face her terror broke, and she sat down beside him, “Hi Tommy, I’m Athena.”

"She's also the Herald," Mother Giselle said softly.

“The Herald healed me?!” Tommy jumped up and started dancing, which had everyone laughing. When he stopped dancing, he said, “I knew you were kind. I can’t wait to tell my friends!”

While Athena was distracted, Cullen received word that Blackwall/Rainier had been brought in from Val Royeaux and was in the dungeon. Cullen left to go talk with him without anyone noticing.

“Why did you lie to the Inquisition?” Cullen stood in front of Blackwall’s (it’s easier to spell) cell.

“I believe I already explained that to the Inquisitor.” The man formerly known as Warden Blackwall said, “She’s now sending her Commander to verify what I already told her? It seems like an awful lot of trouble when she could have just left me there.”

“No one sent me here. I wanted to hear your reasons for myself,” Cullen said quietly to hide the menace he was feeling.

“Because I had lied to everyone else.” Blackwall recognized the tone and decided to be honest, “and I never thought I’d feel the need to own up to my past.”

"And after you told the Inquisitor all this, you compared her to you? When has she ever lied to you? When has she ever told you to go and massacre a family?” Cullen growled, coming closer to the bars. He looked like he was ready to hit something…or someone.

“She hasn’t yet, I hope she never will.”

“Then why did you say it?” 

“To get her to leave me in Val Royeaux. Or…” Blackwall stopped.

“Or?” Cullen cocked an eyebrow. He truly thought the man in front of him couldn’t sink any further in his regard for him.

"To see how far she would go." Blackwall ended any hope of winning back Cullen’s respect.

“Meaning to see if she would get angry enough to kill you,” Cullen growled angrily, facing the imprisoned man.

“Yes!” Blackwall shouted, “is that what you want to hear?!”

“Is it the truth?” Cullen was unfazed by Blackwall’s shouting. He had no respect for the man before him, and what’s more, he hurt Athena.

“Yes,” Blackwall crumbled, sitting on the bench in his cell, his head between his hands.

“The Inquisitor is nothing like you. You would do well to remember that. You should be thanking the Maker that I am not the one deciding your fate.” The Commander’s voice shook with anger. As he left, Cullen knew his temper was too foul to go back to his lady love, so he went for a rousing row at the sparring ring before going back to Athena. 

Finally calm enough to return to Duchess, Cullen was greeted by a large circle of people surrounding Mother Giselle, Athena, and Tommy (who was happily perched on Athena’s lap.) Curly was barely able to get through, but he did. Josephine took one look at his bruised hands, “What did you do?”

Curly quickly glanced at our Ambassador, “Sparring ring.”

Josephine shook her head in disapproval. Curly turned his attention to Athena and sucked in a breath. He had thought Athena couldn’t get more beautiful, he was wrong.

“Beautiful, yes?” Leliana appeared beside him.

“Very,” Curly breathed out.

“Tommy has been regaling her with many tales, and showing off his dance moves.” Leliana responded, the smile evident in her voice.

"And he's the only one she sees," Curly said softly, admiring the view. He knew that feeling all too well, it happened any time Athena glanced his way.

“He certainly feels that way,” Leliana said.

“Tommy, it’s time to let the Herald get back to work.” Mother Giselle stood, not wanting to take up too much of Athena’s valuable time.

"Aww, do you have to?” Tommy looked up at Athena.

Athena laughed at the boy’s petulant pout, “Unfortunately, I do, but…” Athena whispered in Tommy’s ear and his eyes widened.

“Really?” Tommy’s voice was full of hope and wonder with the secret Duchess told him. Athena nodded her head. Tommy smiled, “okay, bye!” And left with Mother Giselle.

Since the show was over, the crowd dissipated, and Cullen sat down beside her at the table. Athena picked up one of his bruised hands, looked at it, and shook her head in bemusement, wondering who had irritated her love today. Cullen groused, “I went to the sparring ring.”

“Why?”

“Because I needed to after my conversation with a prisoner.” 

“Blackwall’s here.” Athena flatly stated. 

Cullen was surprised that she wasn’t shocked, “Did someone tell you while I was gone?” 

"No, but I doubt you would be talking to the surgeon's apprentice again, and Blackwall would be the only one to anger you enough to need a significant release.” Athena sighed wearily. Now that the sudden rush of excitement and drama had waned, she was so exhausted that she could barely keep her eyes open.

Cullen saw how much Athena was struggling to stay awake. He stood and reached out a hand to help his lady love up, “Let’s find a quieter spot.”

Athena gratefully took hold of his hand, and they made their way to her quarters (they were closer and lacked a hole in the roof.) 

Athena flopped down on the bed. She was too tired to find the energy to undress. 

Curly looked for First Enchanter Lydia’s journal. When he found it, neglected underneath the settee, he settled in to read it while Athena slept.

**

When Athena woke she knew that her first priority had to be judging Blackwall/Rainier. She sighed and murmured, “I still don’t know what I’m going to do.”

Curly got up from her desk, walked over to her, and hugged her. Athena obviously valued Cullen’s advice and asked, “What would you do?”

“At the moment, I do not have a high opinion of Black… Rainier. I don’t want to influence your decision, Athena. Whatever it is, I know it will come from your heart and that it will be the right decision,” Cullen quietly assured her.

“I love you.” Athena wondered how she could get so lucky as to have a man like Cullen place so much faith in her.

“I love you, too,” Cullen quickly kissed her, “We have work to do.”

The main hall had several people milling about, anxiously awaiting Duchess’s decision. Our lovers went their separate ways and Athena told Rainier/Blackwall that she would grant him his freedom on the condition that he atone for his past transgressions Blackwall swore himself to the Inquisition until Corypheus was defeated. Afterwards, Athena went to the garden to talk to Mother Giselle about Tommy, “How is he?”

“He is doing very well,” Mother Giselle watched Tommy play with his friends. Running, jumping, hiding, it was a weight lifted from her shoulders to see the boy playing again.

“How did Tommy become blind?” Athena asked quietly, so she wouldn’t be overheard by the boy.

“His mother told Adan that she was putting something in his eyes because his eyesight had always been weak, and a healer told her that it would help him see better. Adan told her to stop, it was making Tommy’s eye sight worse.”

“I’m guessing his mother didn’t follow Adan’s advice.” Athena was angry on Tommy’s behalf.

“No, she didn’t, and when he went completely blind, they left him in the chantry.” Mother Giselle said and Athena closed her eyes to hide the tears that were filling them.

“What happened to his parents?” Athena opened her eyes again to look at the kindly Mother.

“No one knows. Even Sister Leliana’s people can’t find them.” Mother Giselle said.

“You don’t think they were…” Athena stopped, suddenly afraid to ask if Tommy’s parents died at Haven.

“I don’t think so. They left Tommy at least a month before…” Neither woman wanted to bring up the destruction of Haven.

“Thank you, Mother Giselle.” Athena said, “Tommy?”

Tommy came running over to them, “Yes?”

“I have something for you, but you cannot eat it until Mother Giselle says so. Okay?” Athena crouched down to be on Tommy’s level.

“What is it?” Tommy asked excitedly. Athena produced a brownie fresh from the kitchen.

“Yay!” Tommy yelled.

“You have already had dinner. You may eat it, Tommy,” Mother Giselle said, smiling at his excitement, “Inquisitor…”

Athena stopped her and said, “Athena, please.”

Mother Giselle nodded, “You are too kind.”

“I have to go. Tommy, be good.” Athena smiled at him and Tommy nodded with a mouthful of brownie.


	14. Chapter 14

Athena went in search (it wasn’t much of a search considering the first place she tried was his office) of Cullen. She knew they needed to find Samson. When she opened the door, Athena heard that he was having a meeting about that exact topic. She snuck in to the back and behind the door, reminiscent of another meeting that she didn’t want to interrupt. 

He thanked the soldiers for the information and escorted them out. Once the door was shut he said, “That's not an appropriate hiding place.”

Athena chuckled, “I wasn’t hiding. I didn’t want to stop the meeting. What did you find out?”

"We found Samson's headquarters. It appears Maddox has been helping Samson.”

“Who’s Maddox?” 

“Maddox was a Mage at the Kirkwall circle who Samson would deliver love letters for. Knight-Commander Meredith had Maddox made tranquil and Samson was dismissed from being a Templar. Samson must have saved him.” Cullen’s voice held a note of respect for his now nemesis.

"Maddox was made tranquil for passing love letters?” Athena blanched, briefly wondering what Meredith would have done to her. Nothing good, she was certain.

“The official charge was “corruption of a Templar” and Meredith made people tranquil for much lesser offenses.” Cullen explained.

Athena shook her head, not wanting to believe someone could be that cruel. Going back to focusing on the task at hand, “I guess I’m off.”

“This time I’m coming with you.” Cullen stated.

“Cullen…” Athena started, she would love to spend more time with him, but going on a mission to potentially kill someone, isn’t exactly romantic.

“Athena, even if we weren’t in love, I would be making an exception for Samson.” Curly interrupted her.

Athena kissed him. After the kiss ended, she said, “Please be careful? I wouldn’t be able to bear it-”

Cullen placed a gentle finger to her lips, stopping her, “I feel the same way about you and it’s all the more reason for me to go with you.”

On the way to Samson’s headquarters, we had to break for camp. Which was… Well I’m just going to tell the story.

“This isn’t any fun,” Sparkler grumbled.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Athena’s not paying any attention to us,” Dorian complained.

“When we go back to Skyhold, you’re going to run off to some mystery place and we won’t see you for days. And now you’re complaining because she’s not paying attention to you? This time she gets to travel into danger and almost certain death with the one she loves. Leave her alone,” I responded, incredulous.

“Makes me sound incredibly selfish doesn’t it?” Dorian grinned unrepentantly.

“Yes, it does.” Bull quipped. I chuckled.

As Athena and Cullen came back from setting up their tents… (Make that tent). Cullen thought we looked suspicious and asked her, “Do you get the feeling they’re talking about us?”

Athena chuckled, “They're always talking about us. It’s their favorite hobby.”

“Not mine, boss.” Bull said.

“I know, Bull,” Athena laughed.

“Sparkler was complaining.” I interjected.

“Do I want to know?” Athena asked. I shook my head.

“So, Curly, want to play a game of Wicked Grace?” I was hopeful that with only a few of us, he’d feel more comfortable with losing his shirt, pants, and underclothes.

“I don’t think so.” Curly refused, remembering all too well the last time we played Wicked Grace.

“Ruffles isn’t here, you might stand a better shot.” I cajoled and got out a deck of cards to shuffle them.

“No Wicked Grace tonight, Varric… Unless you, Bull, and Dorian want to play.” Athena replied.

“Duchess, you’re breaking my heart. I thought you were always up for a game.” I placed a hand over my heart, wounded by her words.

“When have I ever said yes to Wicked Grace while out in the middle of nowhere?” Athena questioned me. I really need to change my ruthless attitude toward the game, but that wouldn’t be any fun.

“You just don’t want to risk ending up like Curly last time,” I grinned, “as so aptly put by our leader. What should we do in the middle of nowhere?”

“You could tell a story,” Tiny suggested.

“I think we’ve heard them all,” Dorian said.

“Then what would you like to do, Sparkler?” I asked.

“We could all ooh and ahhh over the Inquisitor and The Commander kissing,” Dorian grinned evilly.

Both Curly and Athena blushed, but they didn’t stop kissing. When they did, Athena threw a pillow at Dorian and hit him in the face, “I’ll get you back. And I liked Bull’s idea of telling stories.”

Dorian winked at her, “I know you will.”

Cullen shook his head, amazed at how relaxed the setting was, despite the somewhat ruthless teasing (ruthless for him, maybe), “Is this how it usually is?”

Athena laughed, “They're actually behaving themselves tonight.”

“So, they’re worse than this?”

“Much,” Athena smiled at him.

“Athena, dear, you join in the “misbehaving” as well,” Sparkler reminded her. He was unwilling to let her off the hook.

“Only because you continuously try to get me to blush, Dorian. You do not need to know every detail of my…” She looked at Cullen and slightly blushed. For a moment she forgot that he was there, “… Our love life.”

Curly closed his eyes and groaned, “I really don’t want to know.” 

Athena chuckled, the rest of us out right laughed.

“Since Curly is the guest of honor tonight, he should pick.” I said.

He looked at Athena wondering if there was a safe answer, she shook her head, no. He went with the safest bet, “I liked Athena’s idea of telling stories.”

I motioned to let him know he had the honor of the first story. Cullen thought for a bit, whispered in Athena’s ear, she shook her head to the whispering. Curly stopped whispering and came away from her ear with a secret smile. Cullen told of the first time they played chess together to Athena’s utter mortification.

“Betrayed by her lover,” Dorian tsked while laughing.

“I think Athena should tell one about you now, Curly.” I said, wondering what she would talk about.

Athena sat up from hiding her face in her hands and told of the admirers Cullen had in the Winter Palace, and what they had done to the poor Commander....and Curly’s blush was back.

“Somehow Leliana and Josephine found out…” Cullen looked at her. He thought he had handled himself well that night, despite being a fish out of water, only to continue to be teased by Leliana and Josephine.

“Leliana was standing three feet away from you, and your admirers weren’t exactly quiet… You even refused to dance with me when I asked!”

Dorian and I gasped, Bull burst out laughing. I had to know, “Andraste’s ass, Curly! Why would you refuse to dance with Athena?”

Cullen mumbled so badly that I couldn’t make out what he said.

“It’s okay, I still love him,” Athena did not take her gaze from a blushing Curly.

“How long have you been in love with Curly?” I asked.

“That depends…” Cullen trailed off as he raised an eyebrow at Duchess, recovering from his embarrassment.

“No!” Athena exclaimed, knowing what he was thinking.

“That depends on what?” Bull asked.

“You haven’t told them?” Cullen apparently thought Duchess told us everything… Oh, how I wish that was the case.

“That it was you?” Athena asked and Cullen nodded his head, “Absolutely not! I’d never live it down!”

Curly laughed. “Do you want me to?”

“No!” Athena groused, “but they’ll keep pestering until they get an answer.”

"You know Athena had a crush on a Templar when she was younger?” Curly asked us. Sparkler and I nodded, and I swear Sparkler was holding his breath. Cullen continued, “That Templar was me.”

Bull laughed so hard he fell off the log he was sitting on. Dorian and I looked at each other dumbfounded and speechless.

"And now that I have been thoroughly embarrassed, I’m going to turn in. Goodnight gentlemen.” Athena got up, and tried to walk away… The problem was that Cullen had hold of her hand and he wouldn’t let go.

“I think that’s an excellent idea. Good night.” Curly stood, still holding on to her hand. Once they reached their tent, they stopped and kissed as a moonbeam lit upon them.

"Awww," all three of us teased after the kiss ended.

“Don’t get too loud in there. Tents aren’t favorable for noise control,” Sparkler teased.

Athena and Curly went into their tent. Cullen pulled her close before they undressed, “if they tease you so much, why do you travel with them so often?”

“Because I trust them, and they treat me like I’m human instead of some rare creature or someone to be used for political gains.” Athena answered him. 

Instead of continuing the conversation Curly kissed her, and before sleeping they made love… They were surprisingly quiet, but then it would take a lot to drown out Bull and Sparkler sparring. (Mostly, Dorian’s complaining.)

Once their love making ended, Athena laid her head on Curly’s chest to listen to his heart beat. He wrapped an arm around her, “No wonder you always come back to Skyhold exhausted.”

Athena lifted her head to look at him, utterly confused, “What?”

"The Iron Bull and Dorian, they're incredibly loud." 

“Oh,” Athena shimmied down to her former position.

“What did you think I meant?” Cullen stroked her bare arm.

Athena blushed, “Considering what we just did…”

Curly laid back down, blushing, “Oh, Maker, no, I, um… I’m just going to stick with no.”

“If that was the case, I’d have amazing magical powers,” Athena chuckled.

“What do you mean?” Now Cullen was confused.

“To magically transport myself back to Skyhold, make love to you, transport myself back to where ever I may be without either one of us remembering…” Athena trailed off. She couldn’t help but think that would be pretty fun, except for the not remembering part.

“I’m still sticking with no.” Cullen griped and Athena laughed.

**

Athena was wakened by Cullen shaking and screaming no, repeatedly, just before sunrise. And just as she did before, she whispered in his ear, “I love you, it’s just a dream. You’re here with me.”

His screaming quieted but it took Cullen waking up to get the shaking to stop. Athena’s soft voice was quiet when she saw that he was awake, “Hi.”

“Hi,” Cullen whispered and cleared his throat, “would it bother you if I just held you for a while?”

“No.” Athena laid her arm across his chest and her head on his heart. Listening to the steady thrum of her lover’s heartbeat was her most favorite thing to do in the world. She felt Cullen’s arms tighten around her and he held her as if his life depended on it.

After the effects of the nightmare wore off, they came to join us for breakfast. Athena shook her head and made it known by the look in her violet eyes that no questions would be asked about what happened as the sun rose. So I teased Sparkler because he caused another tent to go up in flames.

Before we broke camp I was fortunate enough to find Athena alone, “Is Curly okay?”

“He’s fine.” Athena was being shorter than I’ve ever known her to be.

“Athena, I’m asking as a friend,” I understood her need and desire to protect him.

“I’m sorry, Varric. I love to tease him about the fun and trivial stuff, but this isn’t either of those and the less people that know the better.”

“I understand that, but I have known Curly since the Kirkwall rebellion.” I hopelessly tried to convince her.

“Then you should already know, shouldn’t you?” Athena snapped and after a deep sigh she calmed down, “I’m sorry, that was rude of me. Varric, just like you wouldn’t tell me about Bianca, I won’t tell you about this. If you truly want to know, you are going to have to ask Cullen.” 

“Understood, Duchess,” I said and we parted ways to break camp.

When everything was packed up and ready to go, Curly pulled Athena aside, “Once we get to Samson’s headquarters there won’t be time for this. Please protect yourself? I couldn’t…”

“For once we can protect each other,” Athena paused, “Cullen, during the battle I will be casting magic on you. It’s called a barrier and it works as an extra layer of armor for a time, and so long as no one gets too far ahead of me, I can cast it on everyone. Dorian can do it too. I love you, and so long as it’s within my power I’m going to protect you.”

“I understand.” Cullen kissed her and whispered, “I love you, too.”

Once we got to Samson’s headquarters the fighting was intense, but Samson could not be found, somehow, he was tipped off that we were coming for him. We fought through those defending the place and found Maddox. Maddox had poisoned himself in order to protect Samson.

“Maddox, what have you done?” Cullen asked.

“I’ve taken my entire supply of blightcap essence. It shouldn’t be long now.” Maddox was very weak.

“We wouldn’t have hurt you, Maddox. We only wanted to ask you some questions.” Athena said softly, as she crouched down in front of the dying man.

“That is what I could not allow. Samson saved me, I am returning the favor.” Maddox said and then died.

“Not everything could be destroyed,” Cullen looked around him.

“We’ll look around,” Athena stood, “Maddox deserves a proper burial.”

“I agree, and I’ll make sure it will be done.” Cullen answered.

We searched the compound and found some lyrium bottles, which were licked clean, a note from Samson to Cullen, and the remains of Maddox’s tools.

“Dagna can probably make sense out of these.” Cullen said. With everything searched, we started on our way back to Skyhold. Once again stopping for the night. 

Curly wasn’t much in the mood to talk, so he went to their tent. Athena stayed with us for a while, which got me curious, “Not going after him?”

"Everyone needs some time to themselves, and I think this may be one of those times.” Athena poked at the fire with her stick.

“Today wasn’t a victory?” Bull asked.

“When a person is constantly confronted with their past, nothing is a victory.” Athena stared at the fire, she knew that feeling all too well.

“You’re also forgetting a very important aspect,” Sparkler said, “Samson is still a threat to you.”

Athena smiled sadly, acknowledging that Dorian was right, “I’m going to go check on him.”

When she entered the tent, Cullen was sitting with his back to the entrance. Athena didn’t say a word as she sat beside him, and waited. When Curly finally turned to her, he hugged her, “How is it that you always know what I need?”

Athena half smiled, “Just lucky, I guess. Did you want to talk?”

“I failed you,” Cullen was angry with himself. They should have been able to get to Samson.

Athena pulled back from his hug to gaze into his eyes, “Cullen, you did not fail me. It’s not your fault someone tipped him off. Samson may have left Maddox there because he knew Maddox would sacrifice himself before ever talking. We have information, and you even said yourself that Dagna may be able to work something out.”

“But he's still a threat to the Inquisition," Cullen paused, "to you."

“We will find a way to defeat him.”

“How can you be so certain?” Cullen’s frustration crept into his voice.

“Because I know you, and you’re not going to give up until you find Samson.” Athena responded, her faith in him shone from her violet eyes.

Cullen hugged her again, grateful for the faith she had in him. He was quite curious about something though, “Why did you warn me about the barrier?”

“I always warn those I cast magic on.”

“Why?” 

Athena shrugged, at a loss for a decent explanation, “I always have. When I cast barrier on myself the air around me gets kind of sparkly, and if that happens when someone isn’t expecting it, it could put them in harm’s way.”

"You show so much consideration for others… You are amazing,” Cullen kissed her.

Athena and Cullen joined us for dinner. I smiled at them, “Duchess is always good for lifting the spirits.”

“Stories again tonight, Athena?” I asked after we finished eating.

“I think I’ve had enough embarrassing stories told about me on this trip.” Athena responded.

"Aww, come on, we don’t have to talk about you,” I wanted to convince her to stay.

“Yes, we do. She’s so adorable when she blushes,” Sparkler put extra sparkle in his smile.

“…And goodnight,” Athena tried to stand, but she couldn’t because Curly’s arm was around her shoulders, and he wasn’t moving.

“Let’s stay for one story, from Varric,” Curly said diplomatically.

“Me? I’m honored,” I said, “Since Duchess was teased mercilessly last night, she should pick.”

“I’ve read all of your books… So, I’m not really sure what to pick.”

“Wait, you’re a fan too?” I asked.

“One of our first conversations was about one of your books.” Athena was surprised that I didn’t remember.

I chuckled, “A lot’s happened since then. It’s still your pick.”

“Something funny and light-hearted,” Athena said.

"Happy to oblige,” and I told a story about how Isabela would mercilessly tease Aveline.

After I finished the story, we said goodnight to each other. Curly stopped me before following Athena, “Thank you, Varric.”

“For what?” I asked, surprised.

"For not saying anything about this morning,” Cullen said looking sheepish.

“I’m not following, Curly.”

“I saw you and Athena talking this morning, and I know she considers you one of her best friends…” He placed a hand on his neck and rubbed it.

“She may consider me one of her best friends, and I am honored by that. But, Curly, she loves you. I won’t deny that I asked, but Athena told me that if I wanted to know that bad, I needed to ask you.” 

“And will you?” Cullen asked.

“Eventually. I do plan to write a book about you two after all. Goodnight, Curly.” I winked at him and left. Cullen stood for a second, contemplating what I told him, and finally followed Athena.

“Did you know that Varric’s planning on writing a book about us?” Curly asked Athena once he got inside the tent.

“He told me he may write a book about the Inquisition…” Athena trailed off.

“That’s not what he told me.” Cullen took off his armor.

Athena walked over to him, “Thank you for not letting me leave tonight.”

“You’re welcome. You had requested one of Varric’s stories last night, and you deserved to get one.” This time she kissed him. After the kiss ended, Curly asked, “You’re not worried about Varric writing a book about us?”

“Have you read any of his books?”

“No, I haven’t.” Cullen took one of Athena’s hands in his own.

“You should, he really is an excellent writer. And I don’t think he would do it without our permission.” Athena responded.

“That’s good to know,” Cullen stopped talking and looked at their entwined hands. Thinking back on his conversation with me.

“Is there something on your mind?” Athena wondered at her love’s sudden silence.

“I don’t deserve you.” Cullen said hoarsely.

“Cullen?” Athena was worried. Where was this coming from?

“I saw you and Varric talking this morning, and knowing how close you two are, I just assumed that you had told him…” Cullen choked back tears.

Athena waited until Curly looked at her to speak, “I love you with everything I am. But what you go through almost every night is not something I will ever take lightly or talk about with anyone else. If you choose to talk about it, with anyone other than me, I will be there right by your side.”

Cullen crushed her in a hug and kissed her like he was suffocating and she was air. They got undressed and made love. 

Laying together before falling asleep, Cullen whispered, “I love you.”

Almost asleep, Athena whispered back, “I love you, too.”

**

Athena was up to greet the sun. She stood, wrapped in a blanket, and faced east. Her back was to the tent. As the sun broke over the horizon, Curly came to stand behind her, “Didn’t sleep well?”

Athena jumped, not expecting anyone else to be awake. She smiled and leaned back on Cullen, “I slept fine. I just like to see the sun rise.”

Cullen wrapped his arms around her and they watched the sun rise together. Its rosy fingers lessening the darkness of the night.

When everyone woke, we broke our fast and I asked Curly and Athena if they slept well.

“We did,” Cullen answered.

“Good to hear. What’s the plan when we get back to Skyhold?” I asked.

“Talk to Dagna and see if she can figure something out.” Cullen took a bite of his food.

“So… Maybe some down time for you two then?” 

“You mean where we’re not running all over creation?” Athena gasped in feigned shock.

I chuckled, “Exactly.”

“It would be nice, but I’m sure something has come up.” Athena looked down, weary from the constant travel and being away from the one person she loved. Cullen put his arm around her.

"This nonsense won't last forever, Duchess," I said quietly to reassure her and myself.

“Thanks, Varric.” Athena said softly, “We should head back.”

We packed everything up and made our way back to Skyhold. Once back, we went our separate ways. Athena and Cullen went to his office to talk to Dagna, who was thrilled over the things they found, gave them a list of the things she needed, and said she needed time. Once she left, Athena went to look out one of the windows. Curly watched her for a while, thinking it was unlike her to be so pensive. He asked gently, “Athena?”

Athena was startled out of her thoughts by his voice and quickly wiped away her tears. Cullen saw and quickly walked over to her, and hugged her, “Talk to me, please?”

“It’s silly,” Athena whispered, trying to not cry harder.

“Anything that makes you cry is not silly,” Cullen pulled her away from the window to sit down on a chair.

Athena hid her face in her hands (old habits die hard). Cullen gently pulled her hands away from her face and held her until the tears and sobs lent themselves to broken hiccups. He waited until the hiccups were only here and there, and tried again, “Please talk to me?”

She took a deep breath (interrupted by a hiccup, of course,) and said, “Even though it wasn’t for the greatest of reasons, it was amazing having you with me for more than a day, and the stolen moments here. I felt so much safer and more confident with you… And I wish…” Her voice caught, “I wish you could come with me all the time.”

"Oh, Athena..." Cullen whispered, tears in his eyes.

“And then I feel incredibly guilty and selfish, because I know you’re needed here and I know you’re safe here and if anything were to happen to you…” Athena stopped and started crying again.

Cullen kissed the top of her head. Once he felt the lump in his throat fade, Curly spoke, “I wish I could be with you on the road too. This war won’t last forever…” He trailed off, placing two fingers under Athena’s chin and gently lifting so he could look in to her tear filled eyes, “I love you and I will be yours for as long as you’ll have me.”

“So long as you’re okay with me having you forever…” Athena whispered.

Cullen smiled, whispered, “Always,” and kissed her, slowly and gently and eventually, made love. Afterwards, Cullen whispered, “Feeling better?”

Athena smiled up at him, “Yes. I’m sorry for earlier.”

"You have nothing to apologize for. With everything you give and do for everyone else, you should have the right to be a little selfish. I wish I could promise that we would have a couple days to forget about this war.”

“Me too. We just have to make the stolen moments all that more special,” Athena whispered and kissed him. Which lead to other, more passionate things.


	15. Chapter 15

First night back and Curly and Athena were woken up by someone barreling into his office yelling, “Commander Cullen!”

Cullen and Athena both groaned. He got out of bed and as Curly dressed he called out, “I’ll be right down.” Curly watched Athena stretch languidly in bed, “You're not coming are you?”

She shook her head and smiled mischievously at him, “I’m going to do my best to hide until morning.”

Curly shook his head and descended the ladder to his office, “What’s the emergency, Officer Sylvan?”

“It’s the Inquisitor’s parents… They’re back and they are demanding immediate entry,” Officer Sylvan said, catching her breath. A very loud groan could be heard from upstairs.

“Why are they here?” Cullen came close to growling. He remembered all to well their last visit.

“They say their lives are in danger,” Officer Sylvan said.

"And what does Sister Leliana say?" 

“She’s trying to find out, Ser.” 

“Thank you, Officer Sylvan.” Athena joined them, fully dressed in black leather pants and a blue velvet top.

“Inquisitor!” Officer Sylvan saluted and left.

Athena and Cullen went to the gates to see if it was possible to keep them outside until at least the sun rose. It wasn’t as it had started to snow. Athena was asked, “Where would you like your parents to sleep?”

She answered, under her breath, “The dungeon.” 

Curly heard her and chuckled softly. Athena asked, “Where are rooms available that they can be watched at all times but not know they’re being watched?”

“I know of such rooms, and I’ll have my scouts take them there,” Leliana said as she appeared beside Athena and Cullen.

“Do you ever sleep?” Athena was startled by Nightingale's sudden appearance.

Leliana chuckled, “I could ask the same of you, Inquisitor.”

“I try.”

"I can greet them if you wish," Leliana offered. She hoped Athena would say yes as she had some questions for Duchess’s parents.

“As tempting as that offer is, they’re still my parents, and I should at least say hello to them,” Athena sighed.

“As you wish,” Leliana slightly bowed.

Athena’s parents came in, her mother rushed to hug her, and whispered, “Save me?”

Athena pulled back from her embrace, shocked at the hug and the request, “It’s several hours until sun rise. Sister Nightingale’s people will show you to your rooms. We can discuss why you’re here in the morning.”

Athena’s parents followed Leliana’s people to their rooms. After they left she took Curly’s hand in her own smaller one.  
Cullen was confused by the show of affection from Duchess’s mother. He had heard Evelyn murmur something, but couldn’t make out what, “What did your mom say to you?”

“She asked me to save her.” Athena said softly, still stunned.

“Save her from what?” Cullen asked as they walked back to his quarters.

“She didn’t say… I don’t remember her ever hugging me.” 

Curly closed his eyes and shook his head. He would never understand how a parent could not show affection to their child.  
When they got back to Cullen’s quarters, Athena started undressing to go back to sleep, she saw that Curly wasn’t, “Not joining me?”

"I don't think I'd be able to sleep. I want to read more of First Enchanter Lydia’s journal.”

"I'm glad you're able to understand it. Goodnight, my love,” Athena crawled in to bed. She fell asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow. 

Cullen smiled and whispered, “goodnight.”

**

The sun greeted Leliana and Cullen talking quietly. They were looking intently at something in the journal. Leliana asked, “Does Athena know?”

“She said that when she tried to read it, she didn’t understand much of it. It is written in a code Templars would use when they wanted to keep things secret, so I understand her frustration with it.” Cullen answered.

“Why would a mage know that code? And why not teach it to Athena?” 

“A Templar could have taught it to her… But why? Lydia may not have had time. The immediate need was protecting her and teaching her to use her powers effectively, then the mage rebellion, and Lydia dying…”

“I’m amazed the First Enchanter was able to hide all this.” Leliana was stunned. (Stunning Nightingale takes some doing.)

“Hide what?” Athena asked, joining them. 

Cullen put an arm around her and kissed her. Thinking that was a question better answered in private.

“If I didn’t have to go…” Leliana trailed off with mischief in her voice.

“Ha ha,” Curly responded without mirth. Leliana left and Curly asked Athena, “Sleep well?”

"I did. Are you going to tell me what you two were talking about?” Her violet eyes were full of worry.

“How much of Lydia’s journal were you able to read?” Cullen asked, walking her over to a chair.

“I tried to read most of it, but outside of the magic stuff, I didn’t really understand it.” Athena sat because Cullen sat, “I’ve told you this before, Cullen. Why is it so important now?”

“Because, I have been able to read it…” Cullen paused, “It’s written in a code Templars use to keep messages secret… Most of those coded entries, are about you. You had said that the First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander were the only ones that ever seemed to care for you. The way Lydia talks about you in her journal would agree with that. They cared for you a great deal.”

"So, what’s the bad news?” Athena’s voice wavered.

“I want to teach you how to read the code Lydia used, that way you can read it for yourself.” Cullen responded.

“Do I want to know?” The pit of dread that formed in Duchess' belly last night grew.

“I think it would be better for you to read it in her words, than having me tell you what it says.” Cullen’s voice was gentle.

“It’s that important?” 

“Yes, it is.” Curly stopped, and then smiled. He teased her to lighten the mood, “Learning the code is easier than chess…”

Athena shook her head at him as she blushed, “Not nice. What about my parents?”

“Leliana is talking to them right now, and she’s going to be talking to them for a while.” He answered, “ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Athena shrugged. She was worried about what she would find out, but clung to what Cullen told her. 

It only took her a couple of hours to learn the Templar code, which stunned Cullen, “How are you able to learn things so fast?”

Athena shrugged her shoulders, "I've always been a quick study with reading things.”

“Maybe I should write up instructions for how to play chess then,” Cullen tried to lighten the serious mood.

Athena laughed, “How long did it take you to learn it?”

“I was able to read it in half a day, it took the full day to learn how to write it though. And those that were teaching me were impressed because for most it takes years.” 

“Why?”

“I don’t know…” Cullen paused and turned the subject back to the reason he was teaching the code to her, “You’re going to want to read Lydia’s journal before you talk to your parents.”

“Any part I should read first?” Athena wondered what she was going to find out.

“The beginning…” Cullen stopped talking so Athena would look at him, “Athena, I would love to sit here all day…” 

“I know…I think I’ll go to my quarters anyway, people like to barge in here.” Athena smiled. Cullen kissed her. After the kiss ended, she whispered, “I love you.”

He smiled at her, a mere breath away, and whispered back, “I love you, too.”

Athena went to her room with the journal and Curly went off to train the soldier and do other soldiery things. 

**

At sunset Curly was finally able to break away from his duties and came in search of Athena. Sparkler, Tiny, the Kid, and I were playing cards, I called out to Curly, “You really should stop hiding Athena. She missed a lot of fun today.”

“She hasn’t been down at all today?” Cullen asked. I shook my head, “not even to eat?” I shook my head again. Cullen sighed, “Maker’s breath. Varric, can you make sure something to eat gets sent up to Athena’s quarters, please?”

“I will. Is everything okay?” 

“I’m about to find out.” And Curly headed up the stairs to Athena’s quarters. Because he was so worried he didn’t knock. A cursory glance of the room told him she wasn’t inside (as she was never there, there wasn’t much clutter for her to disappear in to.) He did see the journal on her desk though, and looked out on to the balcony. There Athena stood, with her back to him. Cullen walked out on to the balcony, hoping not to scare her…again. He whispered, “Athena?”

For once she didn’t jump and she turned to him, almost smiling, which confused him, “You’re pleased with what you read?”

“I now know why I never felt like I belonged to them, among many other things.”

“That- was not the reaction I was expecting to get," Curly responded, still a little dumbfounded, “did we read the same thing?”

“My father was from Tevinter, and Lydia was my mother. She was married to my father at a young age, became pregnant right after… Evelyn, my aunt, and Bernard couldn’t have kids, only to find out after she gave me to them that he was a blood mage which Evelyn supported. When she found out about Bernard’s plans to make me like him and him killing my pets, she rescinded the adoption….” Athena stopped to take a breath, “that’s as far as I got.”

Cullen chuckled, "You also forgot to eat."

Her stomach rumbled to emphasize Curly’s point, “I did!” Athena exclaimed. “I wonder if Dorian knows who my dad is or was. I wrote his name down.”

Athena walked by Cullen to get to her desk, she was stopped by Cullen’s arm, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Athena smiled at him, “I was loved by at least one of my parents, and those that I had absolutely nothing in common with or even liked all that much, aren’t my parents. I do wonder what happened between Lydia and my father though. Have you read that part yet?”

“Sorry, I haven’t. Do you want to go downstairs?” 

Athena practically jumped for joy, “Yes!” Cullen laughed.

Athena made a bee line for Dorian. "Apparently she was fine?” I asked.

“She still forgot to eat.” Cullen said.

“Why are you so interested in him?” We could hear Sparkler saying.

“It’s a long story. Do you know him? Do you know of him? Is he still alive? What was he like?” Athena asked rapidly.

Cullen got her a plate of food and sat down beside her, "Athena, slow down, you’re talking faster than Dorian.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just excited,” Athena saw the food, laid the paper she had the name written on it, and dug in.

Dorian picked up the paper and read it, “Is this who you’re talking about?” Athena nodded. “Sorry, never heard of him.”

“Can I see that?” Curly reached a hand out for the piece of paper.

“Didn’t know you were an expert in Tevinter names, Commander.” Dorian raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not, but I have more than a passing knowledge on Templars.” Cullen said, “Athena, did you write this down exactly as it’s spelled in the journal?”

Athena stopped eating, "Yes, why?”

“Do you remember that it took me longer to write the code than to read it?” Cullen asked, she nodded, “it doesn’t work to just copy it down…” Curly took a minute to translate it and handed it back to Dorian who promptly paled.

“How… Where…?” Dorian started and then stopped, “This… this is my uncle’s name on my father’s side…”

“Would someone like to clue us in here?” I was getting annoyed with all the secrecy.

“According to First Enchanter Lydia’s journal, she was my mother and Dorian’s uncle is my father…” Athena was stunned by what Dorian said.

“Then who are the people claiming to be your parents?” I asked.

“My aunt and uncle. According to Lydia, due to an ancient… Thing, the title and name pass down from mother to daughter. Lydia being the eldest, inherited the title, however when she went to the circle she had to rescind claim to at least the title, and had to give me up. She wanted to be able to see or at least know what was going on with me, so she chose her sister, because they couldn’t have any kids.” Athena explained.

“So Lady Evelyn is Lydia’s sister?” I needed to make sure I was getting this straight, for the book.

“Yes.” Athena answered.

I shook my head, “Athena, I think the only thing normal about you is your love for Curly.” 

Curly blushed, Athena chuckled and noticed that Dorian was still silent. Athena asked, “Dorian?”

“Yes?” He was startled out of his reverie.

“What are you thinking?” She asked.

“That my uncle never married. I had always assumed it was because he was like me, not because he was actually already married to a Southerner…” Dorian answered, “would you mind if I wrote him? I’ll say that I found this dusty old book that had his name in it and imagine my surprise to learn that he had been to the South.”

“That’s fine. Will you let me know what you hear?” Athena asked.

“Certainly, my dear.” Dorian answered.

I pulled out the cards, I asked Athena and Cullen, “Care to join us for a game?”

“I think I’m going to go back up and read more of Lydia’s journal.” Athena said.

“Curly?” I asked.

“No. I have work to do.”

“Oh… I was hoping…” Athena faltered. She wanted to spend time with Cullen, but she knew she wouldn’t be the best company being absorbed in her mother’s journal.

Curly smiled at her, “if you’re sure.” Athena nodded. He chuckled, “let me gather some paperwork and I’ll be up.”

“Such an interesting date…” I teased. Which Athena rewarded me with sticking out her tongue.

“Sometimes, quiet nights are needed.” Athena said.

“Understood, Duchess.” I smiled at her, “Sparkler?”

“I’m going to go write my uncle.”

"Good night," we said to each other as we parted ways.

**

Athena couldn't wait for Curly to return, she curled up on the couch and started reading. She was so entranced by what she was reading that she didn’t realize Curly was there until he sat down beside her. She jumped, Curly chuckled, “You are very good at getting me to blush and I am very good at startling you.”

Athena blushed, “Sorry… I just…”

“I understand, Athena,” Cullen smiled at her, “go back to reading.” 

She snuggled against him and opened the book back up. Athena was on the last page of the journal when she asked, “What happened to Kern?”

“I believe King Alistair has him locked in a dungeon some where. Why?” Cullen asked.

“He was hired by Bernard to capture me and take me back to them. Most of this page talks of my betrothal to him and how Lydia was going to stop it…” Athena trailed off, tears in her eyes. Cullen put his work down and hugged her. She whispered, horrified and guilt-ridden, “I’m the reason she’s dead.”

Athena cried then, Cullen not knowing what to do or say to comfort her, just held her until the tears and sobs spent themselves. After the tears, Athena said, “I need to talk to Evelyn and Bernard.”

“Wait until morning,” Cullen didn’t want it to sound like an order but it came out that way.

“Why?” Athena’s voice was full of despair.

“I always tell the soldiers to get a decent night’s sleep before going in to battle. Evelyn and Bernard aren’t going anywhere, and having a clear head is a benefit to you.” Cullen gently explained.

“You’re right,” Athena sighed, “I just want this over with and them out of Skyhold.”

Curly kissed her and picking her up, carried her to bed. And they made sweet love.

**

The next morning dawned bright and early, Athena, as usual, was up with the sun rise. And as usual, Cullen greeted the sun with nightmares from his past. As was Athena’s habit, she whispered in his ear, “I love you. You’re not there anymore. You’re here in bed with me.”

She had to say it a couple times before he was able to quiet down. When he opened his eyes she smiled at him, “Morning.”

Curly smiled back, “Morning. Do you always get up with sunrise?”

Athena smiled sheepishly, “Old habits… Lydia would always wake me at sunrise and we would go for a walk before everyone else was awake. I always wondered why she sought me out more than the other mages… What are your plans for the morning?”

“If you’re asking if I have work, I’m open until after lunch.”

Athena had been holding her breath and let out a great sigh of relief, “Will you come with me to talk to Evelyn and Bernard?”

Curly placed a hand on her cheek and caressed it, “Of course, but after we eat?”

Athena laughed and kissed him as her yes.

They joined Cole and I for breakfast. “Learn anything new?”

“I did,” Athena said.

"You're lighter, happier. This is good.” Cole said. Athena smiled at him.

“What are the plans for today?” I asked.

“There are things I need to do here, plus we’re still waiting on Dagna…” Athena trailed off, not sure how to continue.

“So, more waiting…” I grumbled. Kirkwall was a mess at the best of times, but I was missing it.

“I know, Varric. I’m anxious to get this war over with too. But there’s a certain Commander that would be very displeased with me if we rushed in to battle without whatever it is Dagna finds out… Or makes.”

"Rushing into battle means certain death, and I don't think anyone wants that to happen." Curly reminded us all and looked intently at Duchess.

Leliana came in at the end of the conversation and motioned to Curly and Athena that she needed to talk to them. Athena wished us a good day and they followed Leliana in to Ruffles’ office. Leliana asked, “What did you find out?”

“Quite a bit,” Athena told her all that she learned about Kern and how her parents aren’t her parents, “Have you heard if their lives were actually in danger?”

“I had Cassandra question them, and they told her everything you just told me. The one thing I don’t understand is how Evelyn would perform the Rite of Tranquility. As far as we can tell, she isn’t a Templar or a Seeker, so I’m not certain as to how she would know the steps to try. Lydia didn’t say anything in her journal?”

“No, I don’t think she had any idea of what Evelyn and Bernard were up to. The last time she talked to them was when I was ten. Kern showed up about a year later. If Evelyn was able to get Kern on her side, he had Templar friends that could have informed her on what to do.” Athena guessed.

“Someone should pay a visit to Kern then…” Leliana said.

“No, keep him where ever Alistair has him. I still have to talk to Evelyn and Bernard. Maybe they’ll finally be honest with me.” Athena hoped.

“I think Cassandra would have liked nothing more than to seriously hurt them at the end of the interrogation.” Leliana chuckled.

“Remind me to thank her,” Cullen half joked. Athena and Leliana chuckled softly.

Curly and Athena left to go talk to those formerly known as her parents. Before they went in, Cullen stopped her, “ready?”  
Athena chuckled softly, “Surprisingly, yes. They are family, but they’re not my parents, and after this, hopefully I’ll never have to see them again.”

Cullen opened the door for her, and Evelyn rushed out, hugging her, “Athena! I was so afraid you were still upset with me! Come talk with Mommy?”

Athena extricated herself from the hug and said quietly, “Evelyn, I know.”

"Know what?" Evelyn frowned.

Athena rolled her eyes, “Everything except how you tried to make Bernard tranquil.”

“What do you mean?” Evelyn wailed.

“Really, Evelyn?” Athena wasn’t impressed with how dramatic Evelyn was being.

“Stop calling me that! I’m your mother!” Evelyn yelled.

“No, you are not. First Enchanter Lydia was my mother and when she found out what Bernard was planning for me and doing to my pets, she rescinded the adoption. What I don’t understand is why you would go along with Bernard’s plan as I am your niece. And does Kern fit into this?” Athena was as steady as a rock.

"Kern belongs to me!" Bernard yelled.

Evelyn sat down heavily on a chair, “Kern and I were lovers once, but we stopped once he joined with the elder one. I was a fool, Athena. I thought I was in love with Bernard, but it faded quickly, he kept casting spells on me to make me love him. The spells stopped working so he turned to blood magic, and it worked for a while. Kern saw me in one of these trances, and because of being friends with some templars… He even had a few do his dirty work for him. He tried to perform the rite of tranquility on Bernard, somehow it got mixed up and it didn’t work out as he had intended.”

“Kern works for me!" Bernard screamed and moved to attack Evelyn. Cullen grabbed him and held him in place. 

"Bernard, what were your plans for me?” Athena asked him looking at Evelyn.

"To make you my daughter!" He yelled.

“What does that mean?” Athena asked.

“By the rites of blood!” Bernard yelled again.

"Why are you yelling?"

“That’s how he is now, he either yells, or is so deep in a trance no one can reach him,” Evelyn said quietly.

"You wanted me to be a blood mage as well?” Athena asked. Bernard had gone in to a trance at that point and wouldn’t say anything more.

“Yes, Athena, that much I told you is true. It was his idea to have a child. When he found out that I couldn’t, he would experiment on me to see if he could “get my body to work properly.” I’m sorry I treated you so badly, but I never liked or wanted kids. Lydia, on the other hand had a fairy tale romance and loved children. When she found out that she was with child she sent you to me. When you started to show similar things to what Lydia had done as a child, I wanted to send you to her, but Bernard would stop me.”

“I thought my father was from Tevinter?” 

“He was, but he was also the Knight-Commander of Ostwick’s circle. Didn’t he disappear before Lydia died?” 

Athena paled and looked at Cullen and then looked back at Evelyn, “He did. I had assumed that the order had pulled him to a different circle as the rebellion was starting or Kern had killed him… I never knew…”

“We should have told you all this a long time ago, I’m sorry. What would you like to do with me, Athena?” Evelyn asked, not looking at Athena.

“I want you to find happiness, you’re free to go.” Athena almost whispered thinking back to when the Knight-Commander disappeared, amazed and hurt that she never knew that her parents raised her.

“Thank you,” Evelyn said, “I am sorry I didn’t care for you more. What will happen to Bernard?”

“He’ll probably sit in the dungeon for a while,” Cullen answered. He knew that Athena wasn’t listening. She was reliving all of the pain of feeling unwanted, unloved, only to now be told that it had all been a lie. He saw the hurt and betrayal shining in Duchess’ violet eyes and he wanted to hit several somethings, “I’m going to take him there now.”

“Okay,” Athena’s eyes slowly refocused as Cullen left with her Uncle, “Evelyn, I-“

“It’s okay, Athena. Your mom picked out your name, she said that it means wisdom and kindness. She was right. Take care of yourself, I meant it when I said you’re all I have left. Your mom and I may not have seen eye on everything or even most things, but I loved her, and you’re a lot like her. I’ll be going now.” Evelyn said.

“You’re welcome to stay,” Athena nervously offered. 

“No, you need to focus on the future and not be reminded of your past every time you walk through Skyhold.” Evelyn said. 

Athena hugged her and whispered, “thank you,” and left to let Evelyn pack. Athena knew if she walked through the hall to get to her quarters that she would be stuck there all day answering questions, and she wanted to be alone right now so she went to her tower. Which was progressively getting more stable. You might actually need to take a hammer to it to bring it down now. There was a gentle breeze that was made a little stronger by Athena doing one of her releases.

**

Cullen looked up from coming out of the dungeon and saw Athena standing at the top of her tower. He knew the thing hadn’t been fully repaired yet and worried for her safety. Curly made his way up to the top and said, “ At least this thing doesn’t shake when I walk on it, anymore.”

Athena turned to look at him, old ghosts still haunting her violet eyes.

“Are you all right?” He took hold of her hands in his calloused, larger ones.

“Yes… No…” Duchess sighed with frustration and despair, “I don’t know…”

Cullen released one of her hands to gently cup one of her cheeks, “I’m here for you, whatever you need.”

“I know… Thank you,” Athena trailed off. She fell silent for several minutes as she returned to looking out over the expanse of mountains.

Curly waited to see if she would give air to her thoughts. When she didn’t he decided to trust that she would discuss it with him eventually and changed the subject, “Are you going to stay here all day?” 

“No, I wasn’t ready for a thousand questions. While you’re working I’ll probably talk to Varric or Dorian... Or visit with Tommy.”

“Do I have competition for your affection?” Curly gently teased.

Athena laughed and shook her head, “He’s a sweet kid, and I think Mother Giselle may get very upset with me if I bring him another brownie.”

“You’re going to do it anyway aren’t you?” Curly asked. Athena nodded with an impish smile.

“He and Kieran seem so much older than their years, but when they get together, they’re just two little boys, and there isn’t a darkspawn magister from the dawn of time trying to destroy the world.” Athena laid her head on his chest. Closing her eyes and listening to his steady heart beat soothed her frayed emotions. 

Cullen was facing the courtyard he could see that they had an audience. Sparkler, Tiny, and I were heading in to the keep to get lunch, and we noticed that they were there. I gave a thumbs up, Dorian whistled, and Bull laughed and shook his head. Cullen closed his eyes and acted like he didn’t see us, and in an effort to get off the top of the tower, he asked, “Are you hungry?”

“Not really, but I’ll take my time with you however I can get it,” Athena lifted her head to gaze into his eyes. 

He couldn’t resist, Curly kissed her. Of course, as only good friends would do, we applauded. Athena whipped around, giving Curly a face full of brunette hair. (We found this hilarious and had a good laugh while we continued on our way.) Realizing what she did, Athena turned around and very contritely said, “I’m sorry.”

Curly laughed, “It’s okay. If that’s the worse that’s done to me today, I’ll count myself a lucky man.” Athena questioned him with a look, “training new recruits today. It can get…well… Hairy.”

Athena laughed and then asked, “Considering we had an audience. A private lunch or endure their teasing?” 

“What would you prefer?” Cullen hoped for the private lunch.

"I think a private lunch would be too much temptation for us to do other things…” Athena blushed.

Cullen kissed her again, “I think you may be right.”

When they finally made their way to the main hall, they were greeted by applause and yelling. Athena blushed and whispered, “This was a bad idea.”

Cullen blushed too. As they sat, Sparkler started in on them, “You two are too adorable for words. Up on the battlements, kissing, for all to see.”

Cullen whispered in Athena’s ear, “next time, private lunch.” Athena’s blush went from pink to bright red.

“I talked to my Aunt today,” Athena desperately tried to change the subject.

“Anything interesting?” Dorian asked.

“She verified everything in the first ench—“ Athena paused, "my mother’s journal. Bernard would cast spells on Evelyn to keep her with him. He hired Kern to take me from Ostwick and my parents. Evelyn fell in love with Kern, which was why the rite of tranquility was performed on Bernard. She also said that my parents had an amazing romance and that he was knight-commander of Ostwick’s circle… Shortly before Lydia died, he left. I thought it was to go to another circle because of the rebellion and then we stopped hearing about him, so I thought Kern had hurt him, but maybe he went back home?”

“My uncle returned shortly before we received word of chaos erupting in the south. But why would he leave?” Dorian wondered.

Athena shrugged, “I don’t know… Is your uncle’s name Arthur?”

“His middle name is, and I know he hated his first name. Nothing in Lydia’s journal?”

“Only his name and that they were married,” Athena answered.

“How is it that even your past is weird?” I asked.

Athena half heartedly chuckled, “I’m just lucky, I guess.” Curly whispered in her ear again, Athena blushed and smiled at him, “I’ll see you later?”

“Yes.” Cullen stood and turned to walk away. He thought better of it, turned back around, and bent down to kiss her. Of course, at that moment Ruffles and Nightingale walked in to the room.

“Halamshiral is going to be so disappointed.” Leliana loudly teased. Cullen blushed and Athena bit her lip, to keep from laughing. Everyone else laughed. Curly turned and walked away grumbling.

“I feel for the new recruits…” Athena chuckled softly.

“Is that what he’s doing today?” Leliana feigned innocence.

“Ha ha, Leliana,” Athena responded sarcastically, knowing that almost nothing gets past Nightingale.

Leliana changed the subject, “I saw Evelyn leaving. Do you trust her?”

Athena smiled sadly, “She was essentially a prisoner of Bernard’s. I do, now that there aren’t any more lies between us.”

“Good,” Leliana said.

“What is this about a kiss on the battlements?” Ruffles acted as though she was scandalized. Athena closed her eyes and blushed in answer.

“It was a beautiful kiss. The wind gently playing with Athena’s hair, a sunbeam poking out of nearby cloud to shine down on them…” Dorian gushed, “I do have one question, Athena. How do you manage to get your fingers through the Commander’s hair?”

“What do you mean?” Athena opened her eyes to look at Sparkler in confusion.

“The wind certainly wasn’t playing with his hair.” I added.

Athena shrugged, “I’ve never had a problem.”

“Does he take a bath before coming to rescue you from us?” Bull asked. Athena laughed in answer. “I’ll take that as a no,” Tiny guffawed.

“Ew!” Ruffles exclaimed, horrified.

“Sorry, not divulging any more information. But I find Cullen’s hair soft and fun to play with.” Athena replied a smile still playing at her lips.

“Among other things,” Dorian quipped.

“Dorian!” Ruffles exclaimed, scandalized. Dorian shrugged in answer, not contrite in the least.

As Athena’s blush faded, she asked, “Why are you freezing things now, Dorian?”

Sparkler blushed and mumbled, “Shut up.”

The rest of us laughed, and I wondered if Duchess was going to get the story on who Sparkler’s mysterious lover was now that they were more closely related than originally thought.

“Do you know if brownies were made today?” Athena remembered she wanted to visit with Tommy.

“They always are, why?” Leliana asked.

"Curly doesn't strike me as the brownie type,” I interjected.

Athena laughed, “They aren't for him… Or me, for that matter.”

“Tommy?” Josephine asked. Athena nodded as Ruffles’ continued talking, “he’s such a sweet boy.”

“He is. Since I have a little down time, I want to see him.”

“Is he the one you healed?” Dorian asked.

Athena nodded, “Not that you aren’t pleasant company, but I need to find a couple brownies. I have a date,” and winked at us, leaving. She went in to the garden with a napkin covering a couple brownies. Tommy ran up to her and hugged her, “Hi, Tommy.”

“Hello,” Kieran said, following Tommy.

“Hello, Kieran. I brought both of you something, but you have to ask permission first.”

“Have you come to bribe the children with brownies again?” Morrigan haughtily questioned.

“Hello, Morrigan, and yes, I have.” Athena chuckled, taking Morrigan’s tone as a joke.

“You spoil them,” Morrigan warned.

Athena shrugged, “They deserve it.”

Morrigan smiled at her, “yes, they do.”

"Mother, may I?" Kieran asked.

Morrigan smiled, “Aye, you may.”

“Tommy, where’s Mother Giselle?” Athena asked. He shrugged in answer, “here,” she handed him the brownie.

“Thank you!” The boys said in unison and ran off to eat their brownies and play.

“We haven’t had much time to talk since you came to Skyhold.” Athena said to Morrigan.

“We have not. You’re very good with the boys,” Morrigan observed.

“Thank you. I love children.” 

“They are amazing little creatures that you want to protect at any cost.” Morrigan replied as they watched the boys giggle and play.

Athena smiled, “They are.”

“You were the one to heal Tommy, correct?”

"Yes. I’d much rather go around healing children than fighting evil.”

Morrigan chuckled, “Before I had Kieran, I wouldn’t have agreed with you. But he changed me in ways that I cannot fathom. I would do anything for him. What about you, Athena, is there anyone that you would do anything for?”

Athena blushed, “Yes.”

“The Commander perhaps?” 

“I thought you didn’t give any thought to rumors?” Athena nervously asked.

“I don’t. But, ‘tis hardly a rumor when you two are kissing at the highest, most visible point of Skyhold,” Morrigan raised an eyebrow, “the applause from the hall was deafening.”

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “No one is going to let us live that down.”

Morrigan chuckled, “Does he love you?”

“He does.” Athena turned the questioning to Morrigan, “it’s only you and Kieran?”

“That is correct, and truthfully, I prefer it that way.” Morrigan said, “it doesn’t bother you that he was a Templar?”

“No, it doesn’t. I grew up in a circle so I’m quite used to Templars.”

“Your parents…?” Morrigan wondered.

“My mother was the first Enchanter and my father was apparently the knight-commander of my circle.”

“Well, that is interesting.” Morrigan said, “’Tis time for Kieran and I to get to his studies."

“Take care, Morrigan.” Athena said as Morrigan walked away.

She sat on a bench in the garden and with Kieran not available to play anymore Tommy sat beside her. He pulled out a folded up piece of parchment, “Here, I made this for you.”

Athena took it from him and said, “thank you, that’s so sweet,” before she opened it. Once opened it proved to be a drawing of her and Curly kissing. Athena, of course, blushed, and whispered, “oh dear.”

“Mother Giselle said that my parents have been found.” Tommy kicked at the dirt.

“She did?” Athena’s voice was cautious, Tommy seemed upset by this news.

“Yeah,” Tommy was still looking down at the ground, “I don’t want to see them though. They left me when I needed them without even saying goodbye.”

“Oh Tommy,” Athena hugged him, tears lancing her eyes, “wait until Mother Giselle talks to them first before deciding anything. They may have a good reason…”

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Mother Giselle said from behind them, “will you do as she asks?”

Tommy looked between the two women, “I’ll try. Mother Giselle! Athena brought me and Kieran a brownie, and she really liked my drawing!”

Mother Giselle shook her head, chuckling softly, “He’s been waiting all afternoon to give that drawing to you.”

Athena whispered to Mother Giselle, “Please let Commander Cullen or I know when you talk to Tommy’s parents, please?” 

Mother Giselle nodded in assent, “Take care, Inquisitor.”

“Good bye,” Athena hugged Tommy and left.

**

Cullen trained the soldiers outside of the walls of the main keep at Skyhold. He claimed it afforded more room to move around. Personally, I think it was because Ruffles’ yelled at the soldiers for tracking mud throughout the main hall.

Athena walked the battlements until she found where they were training. She watched them, beaming with pride, until one of them took a pretty brutal hit. Duchess flew down the stairs and out of the gates to see if she could help. They had the soldier off to the side with an herb poultice being placed on the wound. Not being needed, Athena moved as far back as she could so she wouldn’t distract anyone. She found a rock against the far wall of where they were training and watched, wincing a couple times and turning her head even more often. 

At sunset, Cullen called it a day by thanking them for their hard work and ordered them to get some food and rest. Everyone headed in to Skyhold. Curly didn’t see Athena so he went in with the troops, and she followed behind them. Moving in between the soldiers, she tried to catch up to him, but somehow managed to come through the gates and off to the side before Cullen came in. I saw her and went over to talk to her, “This is a reversal.”

“What do you mean?” Athena continued to watch for Cullen.

“Normally, Curly’s looking for you, and here you are, looking for him.”

Athena laughed, “Normally we meet around sunset.”

“Yeah, because he has to find you.” I teased. I watched Athena wave at Curly. He didn’t look her way.

“Did you cast an invisibility spell?” I asked.

“No, that’s not in my skill set.” Athena chuckled to hide her worry, “I guess he has other things on his mind.”

"That can’t be it. I was watching earlier today and he was distracted, so distracted...” I stopped because Athena was looking at me with a worried expression, “no, it must be an invisibility spell or potion.”

"Varric, I'm not all that much taller than you. I’m easy to miss.” Athena argued.

"No, that doesn't work either. Curly can find you in a crowd like no other. I was at the Winter Palace, the only time his eyes left you were when you weren’t in the same room.”

“I’m going to go find him,” Athena went to look for Curly in his office, he wasn’t there. She went to the wobbly tower thinking that maybe he was looking for her. He wasn’t there. Checked her quarters, no sign of him. Went to the war room, not there. And since Ruffles’ office is right in front of the war room, she talked to Josephine.

“Who are you looking for?” Ruffles asked.

“Cullen.”

"Why?”

“Really, Josie?” Athena chuckled, thinking it absurd that everyone wondered why she would be looking for the man she loved.

“That’s not what I meant,” Ruffles blushed, “ I’m confused as to why you have to search for him.”

“He walked by me coming back into the keep.” Athena whispered conspiratorially.

“He what?!” Ruffles had a momentary loss of decorum.

“I lost him in the sea of soldiers. I’ve checked his office, my quarters, the war room. Doesn’t he usually come to talk to you and Leliana?”

“If you’re not here, yes. But I wasn’t expecting to see you two until late tomorrow morning.” Ruffles teased.

“We’re not that bad,” Athena groused.

“You could check with Leliana, but I think she’ll be just as shocked as I am.” Josephine offered.

“Thanks, Josie.” Athena left and made her way through the library up to Leliana.

“Athena?” Leliana’s voice held a note of concern. She usually didn’t see Athena without Cullen unless it was business.

“I’ve kind of lost Cullen.” Athena blushed.

“What?!”  
“I went out at sunset to surprise him, and he walked past me…” 

“He what?!” Leliana interrupted, “Sorry, go on.”

“I lost him in the sea of soldiers. I went to his office, the tower I’m usually at, thinking he may be looking for me, the war room, talked to Josie, and there’s no sign of him. Please help?”

“I… I am stunned. When you’re here, he is rushing to be by your side. For him to not notice you immediately, I wonder what he must have been thinking of. I haven’t seen him, and when you’re here, I know that if I need to find him, I find you…” Leliana trailed off, at a loss.

“No ideas?” Athena asked. 

“The only thing I can think of is to walk the battlements. He is going to get teased mercilessly for this.” Leliana warned.

Athena went up to the battlements and walked them, once again no sign of him. Re-checked his quarters, nothing. “And they say I’m the one that can be invisible.” Muttering to herself, Athena walked back to the main hall and sat down with Dorian, Bull, and me.

“Shouldn’t you be with Curly?” I asked when she sat down.

“I would be… If I could find him…” Athena said.

"You can’t find him?” Sparkler asked, “I saw you waiting for him.”

“He walked right by her…twice.” I informed them.

“He- He... What?!” Dorian exclaimed.

“That’s the going reaction.” Athena quipped.

“I just left the tavern, he wasn’t there,” Tiny said.

"Thanks, Bull I didn’t check the holding cells, but I’d rather not go down there until Bernard is judged. He wasn’t in the garden when I checked the battlements.” Athena was thoroughly confused.

“Did you check with the surgeon?” Sparkler asked.

“He didn’t look injured…” Athena trailed off, worried that he may have been injured.

“He may have went to check on another soldier,” I tried to allay her fear.

“Do you want us to search for him?” Bull offered. 

“No, that’d be silly. He’ll find me when he’s ready,” Athena half heartedly shrugged.

“But you wanted to surprise him.” I reminded her.

Athena wanly smiled, “I did, but…”

“Well, boys, I think a search party is needed.” Bull said.

“You still didn’t find him?” Leliana overheard what Tiny said as she came out of Josephine’s office. Athena shook her head in answer.

"Yes, a search party is in order.” Leliana said.

“No, he hasn’t been missing that long.” Athena argued.

“Athena, I’ve told you how annoying he is when you’re not here. For him to not see you and then not be easily found is incredibly odd.” Leliana responded.

“There were a couple of places I didn’t think to check.” Athena said.

“Oh?” Leliana was curious.

“The infirmary and the holding cells.” Athena was trying to not worry.

“There’s no harm in checking them. I’ll check the holding cells if you want to check the infirmary?” Leliana offered.

Athena closed her eyes and sighed in frustration, "I don’t have a choice do I?”

We all chuckled and said, “no.”

"Let's go." Athena stood. We all stood with her, "No! Just Leliana!”

“Again, Duchess, not getting a choice in the matter.” I said.

“Andraste, save me,” Athena muttered under her breath.

“We’ll find him,” I winked at her.

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Athena breathed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love that you’re binge reading this! Seriously, thank you so much! But, go drink some water, take a break. Sleep if you need to. (I don’t want Curly or Duchess thinking I’m not caring for my readers.)


	16. Chapter 16

We went our separate directions to find Curly. Athena went to the infirmary (normally it wouldn’t be the wisest place for a mage healer to go, but the surgeon had forbidden magic to be used on her patients.) Athena looked through the tents and patients and there wasn’t a sign of Cullen or any of the soldiers that hd been training with him.

Athena thought to check Curly’s quarters once more. It was completely dark, which meant he hadn’t been back, but then she heard rustling upstairs. Leliana peeked in hearing the noise as well. Athena shrugged her shoulders at her and climbed up the ladder as quietly as she could.

There was a single candle lit beside Curly’s bed. She heard someone curse after what sounded like someone stubbing their toe. Athena sent up a little flare to illuminate the room, and saw a small man, dressed all in black, rummaging through Curly’s chest. The thief pushed her out of the way, Athena yelled, “Nightingale!”

Leliana was in the door with bow drawn before Athena finished yelling. The thief stopped. Leliana said menacingly, “On your knees.”

The thief obliged. Athena tied the thief’s hands behind their back. And the ladies escorted the thief to the holding cells.   
As they left the cells, Athena remarked, “Now I’m worried.”

“We’ll keep searching for the Commander. I want to get Cassandra to interrogate the thief.” Leliana said.

“Understood.” Athena and Nightingale parted ways.

We were waiting for Athena in the courtyard. Athena asked, “Any luck?”

“Morrigan said she saw him with Mother Giselle right after sunset. And Mother Giselle said he was going to go find you.” Dorian informed her.

“Leliana and I found a thief in Cullen’s quarters.” Athena tried to hide her shaking hands, “I’ll check my quarters again. The only other place to look is the tower.”

“Will do, Boss.” Bull said as we went our separate ways again.

Of course, on the way up to her quarters she got stopped by everyone asking about the thief. When she was finally through, she muttered, “This would be a fine time for an invisibility spell.”

Athena reached the top stair to her quarters and she saw a tub filled with water, a bouquet of flowers… Now wilted, and Curly sleeping on her bed. Before she woke him she went to tell Ruffles to let us know that she found him.

As she sat beside Curly on the bed, she started to play with his hair and smiled, fighting tears of relief. Cullen caught her hand and kissed it before opening his eyes. When he opened them he saw the tears, “Athena?”

“I was looking for you. We found a thief in your quarters… And I...” She stopped trying to talk as her throat closed up and tears flowed from her violet eyes.

Cullen sat up and held her, stroking her hair. Once the tears subsided, he whispered, “I’m sorry. I wanted to surprise you, and apparently got too comfortable.”

Athena chuckled a little, “Yeah, that’s what I wanted to do to…” Curly looked at her confused, “I came out to greet you at sunset. You walked by me, I was talking with Varric for the second time.” 

Cullen laughed softly, “I’m sorry. In my defense I was thinking of you.”

“I’m just glad that you’re okay.” Athena said with a relieved sigh.

“This thief you found…” Curly trailed off, he didn’t want to upset Athena again, but he had to know.

"Cassandra is probably interrogating them now."

“Did they hurt you?” Cullen’s brown eyes showed his worry. 

Athena shook her head. “Good,” and then he kissed her slowly, gently, to make up for the worry he caused her. After the kiss ended, Curly said, “I guess we should go down and let the search party know where I was.”

“I told Josie before I woke you.” Athena searched his eyes, relieved he was okay, but couldn’t shake the panic she felt when she thought he was missing.

“Would it upset you if I went to talk to this thief?” Cullen asked.

“I’m not letting you out of my sight… at least not tonight,” Athena sighed shakily.

Cullen smiled at her, “Then we’ll talk to them together.”

Descending into the poorly lit holding cells, they heard Cassandra yell, “Where is he?” And the sound of a bow being pulled back.

“Cassandra? Leliana?” Athena asked.

“Over here, Inquisitor.” Leliana responded. 

They followed the sound of Leliana’s voice. When our lovers’ reached them, the cell was well lit showing that Cassandra was right in front of the prisoner and Leliana had her bow drawn. Which she immediately put away when she saw Cullen, “Commander?” 

Cullen nodded that he would take over Leliana’s role. Trading places, Leliana stood beside Athena and whispered, “Where did you find him?”

“In my room, asleep. Wilted flowers on my desk and a tub filled with cold water.” Athena whispered back.

Leliana smiled mischievously. The next time Athena leaves, she thought, Cullen is going to get teased mercilessly, “Does he know where the thief was found?” 

"Yes.”

“Does he know that you were pushed?” Leliana whispered.

“I didn’t think it was important. I wasn’t hurt by it, and all they,” Athena nodded at the thief, “wanted to do was get away.”

Leliana interrupted the interrogation, “Commander, may I speak with you for a moment?”

“Leliana?” Athena was confused.

“I thought you had been hurt, so we made a much bigger deal out of it.” Leliana explained while they waited for Cullen to walk over to them.

“What made you think I was hurt?” 

“You were pale and I saw what I thought was blood on you after you came down.”

“Cassandra, check the prisoner for injuries, please?” Athena ordered… in her way? 

“What are you two talking about?” Cullen came out of the cell as Nightingale requested.

“Cassandra and I made a bigger deal out of what happened when the thief tried to escape. I thought the Inquisitor had been injured...” Leliana trailed off, uncertain on how to continue.

“But I wasn’t,” Athena finished for her.

“The big toe is almost completely cut off.” Cassandra informed them.

"I thought all he did was stub his toe….” Athena walked in to more of the light and one of her boots had blood on it.

“Would you be able to heal him?” Leliana asked.

“If I wanted to use lyrium…” Athena was interrupted.

“No,” Cullen ordered. He remembered all to well Athena’s stories about her getting ill from using lyrium. In response, Leliana told the guard to go get the surgeon.

“How did you see the blood?” Athena was amazed at Leliana’s powers of observation.

“Oh, no, not on your shoe. There’s some on your shirt.” Leliana pointed.

Athena looked down at her shirt, saw the bloody hand print along with several bloody smudges, and sighed in frustration. It was one of her favorite shirts. A pale lavender that was made of a very soft fabric and one of the few garments that fit her small form well.

“From when he pushed you?” Leliana asked. Athena nodded.

“I should have noticed the blood when you woke me. Are you certain you aren’t hurt?”

“I am certain, if I hadn’t been standing in front of the ladder, I wouldn’t have gotten pushed. All that happened was briefly losing my balance.” Athena was still quite upset over the ruination of one of her favorite shirts.

The surgeon arrived and Cassandra volunteered to stay behind and supervise. As the three of them left, Cullen asked if the thief said anything. 

Leliana said, “We'll discuss everything in the morning. Have a good night you two.” And she melted in to the darkness.

They walked silently to Athena’s quarters holding hands. Once there Athena got out of her blood stained clothes and collapsed on the bed. Cullen laid down beside her so he could face her, “I’m sorry tonight didn’t work out as we had hoped.”

“Me too. I’m just glad you weren’t hurt…”

“I can take care of myself. I have some experience with it.” Cullen sounded as though his pride had been injured a bit.

“I know, it’s just that I was already worried by not being able to find you and then finding the thief. I…” Athena paused, “I thought the worst…”

“It sounded as though you weren’t the only one.” 

“If Leliana’s quick reflexes are any indication, I wasn’t. She’s the reason the thief is now in a cell.” Athena said. Cullen waited for her to continue, “When he pushed me, I called out to her, almost immediately I heard her growl, “on your knees.” I came down to see her with bow drawn and the thief on their knees…” Athena smiled mischievously, “Next time I try to surprise you I’ll have one of your Winter Palace admirers hunt you down.”

Curly growled and kissed her… The kiss turned into something more… Way more. The dawn found them both sleeping peacefully, and they almost slept through breakfast. When they came down, I asked, “Sleep well?"

Athena smiled, “Yes.”

“Good,” I said, “Curly, next time, don’t walk by her.”

“I didn’t see her!” Curly tried not to blush.

“You looked right at her,” I teased.

“I don’t remember that…” Athena looked at me, confused.

“I was standing right beside you, Duchess.”

“Maybe he was looking at you, Varric,” Sparkler quipped.

“I’m not as attractive as Athena,” I retaliated, getting Athena to blush.

"He does have a valid point,” Curly put an arm on Athena’s chair.

“Oh, for the love of Andraste,” Athena mumbled from behind her hands.

"Thanks, Curly, and here I thought you and I had something special going.” I smiled. I think we were all enjoying the light hearted teasing after a night and almost two years of stress.

“Sorry, Varric, you’re just not my type,” Cullen rejoined.

Athena laughed helplessly and shook her head. Looking at Cullen, she asked, “What am I going to do with you?”

Curly smiled, kissed her, and whispered, “Love me.”

We all oohed and ahhed, causing both of them to blush. Nightingale came to pull them away before more teasing could commence. Once in Ruffles’ office, Leliana asked, “Have you had a chance to see if anything is missing?”

“Not yet,” Cullen said.

Leliana chuckled, “Overslept?”

“A little,” Athena said, “How is…”

“He lost his toe, but other than that, he’s fine.” Leliana crossed her arms.

“What was he looking for?” Cullen wondered. He had no title outside of being Commander for the Inquisition.

"He said he was looking for lyrium. Your quarters weren’t the only ones ransacked last night,” Leliana glanced at Cullen.

“How did he get in?” Athena asked.

“He’s the great nephew of one of the visiting nobles. They have been apprised of the situation.” Josephine joined in.

“Did he have a weapon on him?” Cullen asked.

“Not that I saw,” Leliana answered.

“Trying to figure out what you have that could sever a person’s toe by kicking it?” Athena asked. Cullen nodded.

“The injury most likely didn’t occur in Cullen’s quarters, there have been several reports of bloody footprints, we just have to figure out where they started.” Leliana responded.

“I should go see what kind of mess awaits me.” Cullen sighed in frustration.

“Would you like some help?” Athena asked.

Cullen smiled, “Always.”

**

To say Curly’s quarters was a mess would be an understatement. It looked like a force of nature went through the two rooms. Cullen breathed, “Maker.”

Athena tried to look for a spot of floor that wasn’t covered with papers and books….and blood. The desk had been completely cleared off, she bit her lip remembering the last time the desk had been that clear. Cullen noticed where her gaze had fallen and chuckled somewhat, “Let's get started.”

“Where?” Athena asked.

“Anywhere you desire…” Athena looked at the desk again. Curly laughed, “not there.”

Athena laughed, kissed him, and moved to the far right corner. Slowly organizing papers into many different piles. Once most of the papers and books were at least in to organized piles, she came across a letter from Cullen’s sister. It read (because Athena couldn’t resist:) Dear Cullen,

Love? I can’t wait to meet the one who has stolen my brother’s heart. Should we start planning for a wedding, dear brother? We keep hearing good things…

“What are you reading?” Cullen asked.

Athena looked up and smiled, “A letter from your sister.”

Curly blushed, “She’s too forward sometimes.”

“I think she just loves her brother and wants to see him happy,” Athena went back to reading it.

"Athena!" Curly blushed as she continued to read it.

“I let you read my mom’s journal… One little letter, please?” Athena teased him.

“No!” Cullen came over to wrestle it from her.

Athena twisted it out of his grasp and placed it on a pile of personal papers. She shrugged, “I already read the good part, anyway.”

Curly shook his head and chuckled, "What am I going to do with you?"

Athena raised an eyebrow, stood on tip toe, kissed him, and whispered, “Love me.”

Once everything was off the floor in the office and mostly put back where it belonged, they went upstairs. Clothing, more paper (not quite sure how that’s possible,) books, and even some weaponry was strewn about… Every where. Curly started off near his trunk of clothes, picked up a small box, he looked inside it, and gave a sigh of relief. 

Athena heard the box snap shut and his sigh. She looked up from the other side of the bed, saw the box in his hand, and asked, “What's that?”

“Nothing,” Curly blushed putting the box back in the trunk.

“You’re a horrible liar, Cullen.” She teased, but dropped it because she found another letter from his sister. It read: Dear Brother,

I was surprised to read that you had stopped taking lyrium. I think it’s a good thing, I never did like the thought of you taking it. And I’m glad Athena supported your decision. She sounds like an amazing woman, and I can’t wait to meet her. I still can’t believe you're courting a Mage. I thought you had a serious distrust of them considering your past. Is it true that the Inquisitor is a healer? Anyway, I love you, be safe (at least try?) and I’ll write you soon.  
Love,  
Mia

When Athena finished reading the letter she looked up to see if he noticed. He didn’t, she put the letter on the personal pile and continued cleaning. Once everything was put back together in at least a findable fashion they went to have lunch. Leliana, Ruffles, and Cassandra were in the main hall when they came in.

“Was anything missing?” Leliana asked.

“No. Everything was there, it was a mess though.” Cullen responded.

“Good,” Leliana said, “apparently the thief injured his foot in the first room he went in to, and in his desperate search, he kept re-injuring it.”

“His family would like to take him with them when they leave this afternoon. They assure me that he will be suitably punished.” Josephine said.

"They're not going to hurt him are they?" Only Athena would worry about a thief being harmed.

“No, somehow he has become addicted to lyrium. He’s not a Templar or mage, so he doesn’t have any real use for it. They want to get him help. They also understand that the offense here is grave and would like to pay for anything that is broken or missing. It is my understanding that he will be working that debt off.” Josephine replied.

"That sounds reasonable.” Athena looked at Cullen. Cullen nodded his head, agreeing with her.

“Athena, did you find anything interesting out about our Commander?” Leliana asked.

“Why does it matter to you?” Cullen was very suspicious of the spymaster.

“I haven’t found the words to disappoint all your suitors in Halamshiral yet.” Leliana answered, “I was hoping she could give me… Inspiration.”

“She read one of my sister’s letters,” Cullen grumbled.

“Only part of it, you told me to stop!” Athena retaliated.

"Details!" Ruffles demanded.

“Not you too, Josephine…” Cullen pleaded.

The ladies laughed, “She said she couldn’t wait to meet me and essentially asked if we were getting married… That’s all I was allowed to read.” Athena smirked at him.

“You had to tell them?” Cullen blushed.

“It’s sweet,” Athena smiled sweetly at him.

“It’s embarrassing,” Curly grumbled which had the ladies laughing again.

“But it’s so much fun trying to get you to blush… It’s not as easy as it used to be,” Athena teased.

"Can we change the subject, please?" According to Duchess, Curly had turned a lovely shade of red by this point.  
Athena giggled, “I do have to talk about Leliana about something. Don’t disappear on me?”

"I'm not making any promises..." Curly grumbled, giving Athena a hard time.

“Commander!” Ruffles exclaimed, “I’ll make sure he doesn’t leave, my lady.”

“Thank you, Josie.” Athena followed Leliana in to Ruffles’ office. Once the door was closed, Leliana waited expectantly. Athena’s voice was a hushed whisper, almost as if the walls had ears, “What I said out there wasn’t the only thing I saw… There was a small box that he looked inside to make sure the contents were still there, when I asked him about it he wouldn’t tell me anything. You wouldn’t have happened to hear what was in this small box?” 

"A small box?” Leliana wanted to make sure she heard Duchess correctly.

“Yes.”

Leliana just smiled at her with a cunning twinkle in her brown eyes, “You should go back out and enjoy the rest of your day.”

“Not coming?” Athena was curious as to why Leliana was suddenly smiling, but she also knew that Nightingale wouldn’t say anything unless she wanted to.

“No, there’s something Josie and I need to attend to.” Leliana couldn’t stop beaming.

“I’ll let her know.” Athena went back to Ruffles and Curly. Sparkler had joined them, and Curly was blushing.

“Dorian…” Athena warned.

Sparkler threw up his hands, “It wasn’t me, I just sat down!”

“Forgive me, Athena. I was being curious. Does Leliana need me?” Ruffles asked.

“Yes… How’d you know?” Athena asked.

“She didn’t return with you. Take care.” Josephine left.

“Before you two leave, I heard from my uncle… Your father,” Dorian said. Athena sat down beside Cullen and waited for Dorian to go on, “all of it’s true. He left Ostwick because he had found out what my father wanted to do to me, and wanted to stop him. By the time Arthur could come back, the circle had fallen and Lydia was dead… Were you there in her last moments, Athena?”

“I was holding her when she stopped breathing…” Athena said quietly. Cullen put his arm around her for support.

“That would explain why he couldn’t find her.” Dorian said.

“I had her buried. What would he want with her body?” Athena asked.

“As her husband, he felt that he should have been the one to bury her.” Dorian explained.

“She cared for me, I couldn’t leave her there to-to-" Athena’s voice choked with tears.

“Of course not, and he wouldn’t expect you to.” Dorian said, “He did ask if you would be interested in seeing him again?”

"I don’t know…” Athena looked at Cullen and then back at Dorian with her heartache plain to see in her violet eyes, “I thought Kern had killed him. To find out now that… I don’t understand why this needed to be kept a secret from me.”

“He would have been thrown out of the order and Lydia would have been made tranquil,” Cullen responded softly. He didn’t want to hurt her more than she had already been, but it was the truth.

“They could have left the Circle, they could have went to Tevinter,” Athena argued.

Sparkler smiled sadly at her, “If they had gone to Tevinter it would have been likely that they would have been killed. Our grandfather disowned Arthur for becoming a Templar, it was why he left. Think on it, I don’t need to respond to him right away. Welcome to the family, cousin.”

“Thank you.” Athena was trying to hide her warring emotions.

"I'll leave you two to the rest of your day.” Dorian winked at Athena and left.

They sat quietly for a couple minutes and Athena looked at Cullen. He smiled down at her, “What are you thinking?” 

“Lots of things, but I think we have an afternoon to ourselves…” Athena trailed off, she really didn’t want to face her family issues right now.

“I believe you are right,” Cullen said as they stood, and walked to Athena’s quarters.

They made love and as they laid quietly together, Athena couldn’t keep her secret any longer, “I have a confession to make…”

“About?” Cullen was stroking her hair.

“I found another letter from your sister,” Athena felt like purring, Cullen’s touch was so gentle, but she was confused.

Cullen closed his eyes, murmuring, “I’m never letting you help me clean again.”

“She mentioned your distrust of Mages,” Cullen opened his eyes and the stroking stopped as Athena continued, “You told me that you never told anyone what happened at the Fereldan Circle…”

A deep sigh escaped Cullen, “Mia doesn’t know about what happened at the Fereldan Circle. While I was in training to become a Templar, there was a Mage that I had an attraction to. The attraction was mutual.”

“What happened?” 

“We ended it right before I took my vows.”

“Your sister didn’t care for her?” Athena laid her head over his heart, softly sighing in relief.

“Mia never met her… But she heard things,” Cullen tensed like he was bracing for a hit.

“Were they true?” Athena raised herself on an arm to look at him.

“Athena, you know better than most how rumors work,” Athena waited, Curly sighed, “Some were, others were so outlandish I was surprised she believed them.”

“What did she do to you, Cullen?” Athena implored.

“She would perform magic on me. I didn’t have a clue until the spell was done,” Cullen said softly.

"Like what Bernard did to Evelyn?” Athena asked gently.

“Blood magic?” He asked, Athena nodded, “No, but the infatuation spells, yes, and a couple others.”

“Did she play with your dreams?” Athena started playing with his hair. She loved how soft it was.

“At times… And that’s why…” Cullen trailed off, remembering the first time Athena whispered to him to pull him out of his nightmares.

Athena kissed him to stop him from apologizing, “I understand.”

“She’s also the reason I was so surprised when you explained what you were going to do when we went Samson’s headquarters.” He said softly.

"What she did was wrong," Athena’s usually soft and light voice had a hard edge of anger to it.

“We were very young, and she was drunk on the power her magic could afford her.” Cullen said, “you never had any desire to see how powerful you could get?”

“Only once and it almost killed me.”

“That’s different, you were trying to save someone. No desire to experiment or find ways to make your powers better?”

“No, except for trying to save Crystyna.” Athena battled the guilt that came with being unable to save her young friend.

“What about Lydia?” Cullen asked, “Did you try to save her?”

“She forbade me with her next to last breath, and with her last she said that she loved me.” Athena’s eyes filled up with tears at the memory.

“I’m so sorry,” Cullen half sat up.

She smiled at him through her tears, “it’s okay, I just miss her.”

“Did I answer all of your questions?” 

“You did. My past seems to keep finding me, while yours… Kind of… Stays where it belongs…” the smile left Athena’s face, “I wanted to make sure I wasn’t making similar mistakes.”

Cullen smiled at her and kissed her, and as was the wont for the afternoon, the kiss turned in to more. After their romp, they noticed that the sun was setting. Athena stretched and cuddled with Cullen, “I don’t want to move.”

Cullen laughed, “We don’t have to.” And then his stomach growled.

Athena laughed, "Yes, we do." She tried to sit up to start to get dressed, but Curly wasn’t releasing her. 

He put his hand on her neck and gently pushed her head down to kiss her, he smiled after the kiss and said huskily, “No, we don’t.”

“Cullen!” Athena laughingly yelled as he rolled her to the bed with him on top of her. He went on to set off fireworks within her again. When they were breathing normally, Athena groaned, “Now, I can’t move.”

Cullen chuckled with smugness, “Thank you for the compliment.”

Athena gasped in mock outrage, “I compliment you every day… You just blush when I do it.”

Curly gazed at her for a while, caressing her cheek, “You're beautiful.”

Athena blushed, “Thank you,” and then she sighed. She didn’t like the thought of relinquishing their idyllic afternoon, “We should probably go see how much of Skyhold still stands.”

“Dinner first?” Cullen’s stomach growled again.

Athena laughed, as she sat up to get dressed, “Worked up an appetite, did you?”

“You need to eat too,” Curly grumbled.

After she was dressed in a lilac dress, she came over and kissed him, “I love you.”

Curly smiled at her, “I love you too. Ready?”

"Yes," Athena smiled back at him.

Skyhold was still standing when they arrived in the main hall, and for once nothing much went on that afternoon where they had to be interrupted. “What are you two doing down here?”

“We didn’t get interrupted…” Athena sat down, “I got worried.”

“Not used to a peaceful afternoon?” Sparkler asked.

"Not lately, no." Athena looked up and smiled as Curly sat beside her.

“Then this one has been long over due.” I said.

Ruffles and Leliana came over to pull Athena away. Nightingale quipped, “You’ve had her all day, Commander, it’s my turn now.” 

Athena shrugged helplessly and went with Leliana. I noticed that Cullen didn’t blush at Leliana’s comment, “You're not blushing, Curly…”

"The man's worked up an appetite, Varric, leave him alone.” Bull chuckled. 

I chuckled, “I bet he did.” All Curly did was smirk.

**

Athena’s meeting with Leliana and Josephine wasn’t as much fun. They informed her that the thief was back on the road with his family and should not be bothering anyone anymore. Bernard was getting antsy in his cell.

“Have you heard back from King Alistair yet?” Athena asked.

“I expect to hear from him in the next day or so,” Leliana said.

"I would like to hear his thoughts before making a decision considering Bernard is Fereldan." Athena decided. Leliana and Ruffles nodded in agreement.

"Did you have a good afternoon?” Ruffles asked.

“I did. It was wonderful.” Athena said.

“Good. Have a good night.” Leliana smiled.

“Good night ladies.” Athena left to join us again. As she sat down she noticed how quiet we were, “Why are you so quiet?” 

“Not much to say tonight,” I shrugged, at a loss to explain it.

“Are you ill?” She asked, worried. It was completely unlike me to be quiet about anything, and Athena knew it.

I chuckled, “No, just kind of in shock that I couldn’t get Curly to blush. What’d you do to him?”

Athena blushed a becoming shade of pink. I couldn’t help but laugh, and I let them eat in peace. When they were done, they went back to Athena’s quarters. After the door closed, Athena started, “Dinner was…”

“Calm?” Curly tried to help.

“I was going to go with weird, but calm works…” Athena undressed.

“Why weird?” Cullen undressed as well.

“Normally, we’re being teased mercilessly, and that didn’t really happen tonight.” Athena got in to bed.

Cullen shrugged and got in to bed as well. They kissed and fell asleep holding each other. That day was the calm before the start of the storm to end all storms (or so we thought.)


	17. Chapter 17

Athena woke a little before sunrise and grabbed a blanket to go on the balcony to watch the dawn awaken Skyhold. As soon as the sun peaked over the horizon she heard Cullen calling out in his sleep, “No, let me go! No, Maker! Let her go!”

Athena went back and laid beside him. Stroking his hair, she whispered, “I love you.” Over and over again until he calmed down. 

When he woke he saw tears in her eyes, “Athena?” She quickly wiped away the tears and smiled at him. Cullen asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Lydia…” Athena stopped, “… My mother once told me of a special class of mages that could make people dream things… More times than not, their victims went crazy, living out their dreams in an unending nightmare.”

"There was two years between my vows and the fifth blight. The dreams didn’t start until after...” Cullen trailed off.

“I’m sorry… When you said “let her go” I started thinking that…” Athena trailed off, not wanting to speak out loud her dire thoughts.

Instead of questioning her, he kissed her and whispered, “I love you.”

There was a knock on the door and a nasally voice came through, “Inquisitor? Sister Nightingale has received word from King Alistair.”

“I’ll be right down,” Athena called, smiling down at a supine Cullen.

“And the day begins…” Cullen returned her smile.

"Yes, it does.” Athena got dressed in a red velvet shirt, leather vest, and dark gray breeches. When she was ready to leave, she asked, “I’ll see you later?”

"I'm sure we'll find a couple minutes today.” Cullen promised.

She bent down to kiss him and whispered before she left, “I love you.” 

Once Cullen heard the door close he shuddered. The dreams may have started from his past but they didn’t end there, the “her” he referred to was Athena. Instead of reliving the nightmare where Athena was attacked by the demons and abominations of his past, Cullen got out of bed and put on his armor. With the intense desire to hit something, Curly made his way to the sparring ring.

**

Athena found Leliana in Josephine’s office. Leliana said on seeing her enter, “I didn’t wake you?”

“No, I was up,” Athena said, “what did Alistair say?”

Leliana handed her the note, it read: Dear Inquisitor,  
I am sorry for the late response. I was quite distracted by your gifts to me and I cannot thank you enough for them. In regards to Bernard (I thought my family was complicated…) No, don’t write that. I really need to write these letters on my own. As he is family of yours, whatever you decide, I will support. If you would like, I can put him somewhere that he won’t hurt anyone again. 

Sincerely,  
Alistair

“I like the idea of putting him somewhere that he can’t hurt anyone. Send him to Alistair with my thanks, please?”

“Of course,” Josephine said.

"Anything else?" Athena asked.

“I know Dagna was looking for the Commander earlier.” Leliana said.

“Hopefully she has good news,” Athena said her goodbyes and made her way to Cullen’s office. Cullen and Dagna were already meeting.

“Inquisitor,” Curly said by way of greeting when Duchess joined them.

“It’s done!” Dagna exclaimed, full of exuberance.

“What’s done?” Athena looked at Cullen and then at Dagna, confused.

“This!” Dagna pulled out a red lyrium rune, “How Samson hasn’t been driven mad by his armor is a mystery, but then maybe he already is mad. But this will create a weakness in his armor.”

“Thank you, Dagna.” Athena took the rune from her.

"You're welcome, Inquisitor,” Dagna left.

“What are you thinking?” Athena placed the rune on the papers Cullen was shuffling somewhat nervously.

“That this war is almost over.” Cullen looked at her and half smiled.

Athena smiled at him, “Have plans for after?"

“Provided we win, I do,” Cullen’s smile turned secretive.

“Care to let me in on the secret?” Athena walked around the desk so she could put her arms around his neck.

Cullen put his arms around her, “Taking you to meet my family.”

Athena chuckled, “I’d like that.”

“Good,” Curly kissed her.

**

The next meeting of the day was held in the war room. Corypheus and his forces were in the Arbor Wilds, looking for what Morrigan believed was an Eluvian so he could enter the Fade in the flesh. Of course, Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen had different ideas about how to approach the Arbor Wilds, and they started arguing.

“The only reason we’ve been successful so far is because we have worked as a team, that’s what we’re going to do now, as well.” Athena said, “Josephine, contact our allies and have them meet us in the Wilds. Leliana, have your people scout ahead, and harass Corypheus’ forces until Cullen can get there with the soldiers.”

“Impressive,” Morrigan said, “You planned that with such confidence, but the Arbor Wilds is not friendly to strangers, and Corypheus is there now.”

“We all want this war to end. My confidence has nothing to do with me. I have absolute faith in my advisors to work side by side, like they always have. If not for them, we would have been defeated a long time ago.” Athena answered.

"And we couldn't have asked for a finer cause," Cullen said quietly with Leliana and Josephine in agreement.

"Thank you, all of you." Athena left to find me, Dorian, and Cassandra. She informed us that at first light we would be leaving for the Arbor Wilds, she then went to find Tommy and Mother Giselle. Tommy ran up to her and hugged her, “No brownie?”

Athena frowned, “I’m sorry, I forgot.”

“It’s okay. Mother Giselle said that my parents left to find a new home, that the only reason they didn’t bring me with them was because they didn’t want to endanger me, and they didn’t know if they would be able to come back for me.” Tommy rushed through his news.

“Have you seen them?” Athena asked.

“Mother Giselle says they’ll be arriving today,” Tommy answered.

"Are you going to go with them?"

“I think so,” Tommy fidgeted, anxious to be off.

Athena smiled and ordered, “Go play.” Tommy went off as Athena turned to Mother Giselle, “They want him back then?”

“It would appear so. Their letters said they made a mistake in leaving him behind and that they’ll spend the rest of their lives making up for it.” Mother Giselle said.

“Do you trust them?” Athena watched Tommy jump and winced when he fell.

Mother Giselle was watching her and chuckled a little, “I do trust them. Everyone makes mistakes, and almost everyone deserves a second chance.”

“I trust that Tommy’s feelings and wishes will be followed?” Athena requested, but it sounded harsh to her.

“They will be, Inquisitor. The only way he is leaving is if he wants to,” Mother Giselle assured her.

“Thank you,” Athena said, “we leave for the Arbor Wilds tomorrow, so I won’t be able to meet with them.”

“I will pray for your safe return, and I will let you know what Tommy decides.” Mother Giselle said.

Athena walked over to Tommy, “Tommy, I have to go and I’m not going to be around for a while. Don’t be afraid to tell anyone how you feel. You do not have to go with your parents if you do not wish to. If you do, I hope nothing but happiness finds you.” And then she hugged him before he could see the tears. Tommy hugged her back, tears in his eyes too.

Curly was standing by Mother Giselle when she turned around, she smiled at him and quickly wiped her tears away. “She has a good heart,” Mother Giselle murmured and walked away to chase Tommy.

“Tommy’s parents are coming back for him,” Athena said once she was standing in front of Cullen.

“I heard,” Cullen put his finger under her chin and made her look at him. Then he kissed her.

When the kiss ended Athena asked, “What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

"Spending it with you,” Cullen’s voice was quiet, strained. He worried over the coming battle, what it would do to the woman he loved, if they would succeed. What would happen if they didn’t. Shoving the uncertain thoughts aside, he refused to let them intrude on this last semi-peaceful afternoon they would have together for a while, maybe forever.

“Can you do that?”

“Everything is done until we move out in the morning,” Cullen answered. Athena smiled and they left the garden.

I saw Duchess and Curly walk by and called out, “Why aren’t you taking Tiny with you?”

“Because I need him and the Chargers to bolster those we leave behind to defend Skyhold.” Athena paused like she wanted to say more.

Curly looked quite impatient to be off, so I helped, “What are you waiting around for? Go make Curly blush.” I had hoped to get Curly to blush, but Duchess turned bright red, I couldn’t help but chuckle, “Remember this the next time I ask you to play Wicked Grace, Curly.”

Cullen rolled his eyes as they left, hand in hand. “I need to get something from my office.”

“I thought you said everything was done?” Athena asked.

Curly smiled, “It’s just a quick stop.”

Once they reached his office, he handed her a letter from off his desk. Athena flipped it, saw it was from Cullen’s sister for her, “What’s this?”

“It’s a letter.” Cullen laughed.

“I know that.” Athena groused, “Why is your sister writing me?”

"The only way to find that out is to open it.”

"You didn't?” She sat down, looking at the still sealed letter and turning it over in her hands.

“I’m not in the habit of reading other people’s mail,” Cullen teased.

Athena gasped, “Your mail was already open and it was laying on the floor.”

Cullen sat beside her and encouraged her to open the letter. Athena looked at him with terror in her eyes, and then looked at the letter like it had transformed into a demon while she was holding it.

“Oh, Athena, “ Cullen laughed, “Mia’s letter isn’t going to bite you.” Athena still hesitated, “How is it that you can face down demons, red templars, dragons, and Maker knows what else on an almost daily basis, but one letter from my sister, terrifies you?”

“I’m not in love with a demon or a red Templar."

Cullen kissed her, and ordered, “Open it.”

Athena opened it, slowly, so slowly that it looked as though she thought it was something incredibly fragile. Finally, with the letter was opened, she read:

Dear Inquisitor,

I hope this letter finds you in good health. In my brother’s letters he seems very happy and full of hope for the future. While he writes far too infrequently the letters are longer and mostly about you. I have prayed that he would find someone that could see the amazing man he is, it seems (if his infrequent letters are any indication) that he has found that in you. And for that, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I know he cared for another Mage when he was younger, but he never sounded happy. He tells me that he hopes to bring you to meet us when this war is over, and I cannot wait to meet you. He also tells me that you are horrible at chess, don’t worry, he’s a horrible teacher.   
Thank you again, and I hope we are able to meet soon.

Sincerely,  
Mia (Cullen’s Sister)

Cullen read over her shoulder and Athena noticed. She arched an eyebrow at him, "I thought you didn’t read other people’s mail?”

Curly blushed and grumbled, "It’s my sister."

“Why would you tell your sister about my absolute failure at chess?” Athena blushed. She was somewhat embarrassed that a stranger knew one of what she considered her failings.

“Because it’s one of the many things I find amazing about you,” Cullen kissed her.

"She also said you’re a horrible teacher,” Athena said with their noses touching after their kiss.

“She would,” Cullen murmured, going for another kiss.

"Even if you are a horrible teacher at chess. There are other things that you are an excellent teacher at,” Athena’s voice turned deep and husky.

Curly smirked and kissed her… And the desk was used for un-desk like things again.

Athena laughed as she sat on the desk afterwards, seeing the papers on the floor. Curly asked, “What are you laughing at?”

“The mess.”

“At least I’ll have help cleaning it up,” Cullen glided his fingers up her naked back to the nape of her neck.

“I don’t know if I want to…” Athena teased as an involuntary but delicious shiver accompanied Cullen’s touch.

There was a knock on Curly's door, “Commander?”

Athena gasped and quickly jumped off the desk to hide upstairs, unwilling for anyone but Cullen to see her naked. 

Cullen yelled, “Just a minute!” As he hastily threw on some pants, once pants and shirt were on Cullen went out to meet the interrupter, closing the door behind him.

“Report for you, Commander.” The soldier handed him the report and left. Curly murmured, “thank you.” And went back inside, reading the report.

Athena was fully dressed except for shoes and started to clean up the mess they made while he read the report. They finished at the same time (it was much less messy than when the thief ransacked it and she didn’t find any interesting letters,) Athena asked, “Anything interesting?”

"A list of new recruits,” Cullen said. “You didn’t find anything interesting to read?”

Athena blushed and shook her head as she put on her socks and boots, “Would you like to go for a walk?”

Cullen put on his boots and smiled. They walked out of his office hand in hand and walked the battlements. They stopped at her tower which was improving in stability daily. “Did you want to go up?” Cullen asked. Athena shook her head, no.

“Restless?” He asked.

Athena chuckled nervously, “Is it that obvious?”

“Only because I feel the same,” Cullen assured her.

“I want to enjoy my time here, with you, but I can’t stop thinking about tomorrow,” Athena confessed, and turned away from Cullen to look at the snow capped mountains. Cullen stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Athena grabbed on to his arms with both of her hands, and they stood like that for quite a while. Not wanting to give a voice to their fears, too afraid that they would jinx the upcoming battle by giving voice to their hopes… Their dreams.

They stood, silent and still. The only thing willing to play was the wind. The call rang out through the soldiers on the walls and in the courtyard that dinner was served, and that was what finally broke them out of their reverie. Cullen whispered, “Hungry?” 

“Not really, but I need to try to eat something,” Athena turned in his embrace and looked up at him. 

Cullen growled, deep in his throat, giving in to his desire and kissed her hard and passionately and long. After the kiss they were both breathless. As Curly caught his breath, he smiled a little, “Dinner?” 

Athena laughed and nodded her head.

As much as I wanted to tease Duchess and Curly, my heart just wasn’t in it. We were all feeling the effects of the coming battle. It was a quiet meal, not much was said, no teasing, no blushing… Boring. 

When Cullen and Athena were done eating they said goodnight and went in search of Leliana and Josephine to make sure everything was ready for the morrow. Which, of course, it was. After the meeting Athena asked, “Can we go up to the tower to watch the sunset?”

Cullen, of course, agreed. In that moment he would have agreed to anything Athena desired. They climbed to the highest point of the tower to watch the sun descend behind the mountains. Athena watched the sunset, Curly watched the last of the sun’s rays bounce off of Athena’s up turned face and highlight her brown hair. Cullen whispered more to himself than for Athena to hear, “You are so beautiful.”

Athena looked at him, smiled and teased, “Thank you, you’re not so bad yourself."

Cullen chuckled and blushed a little. Athena took the couple steps it took to stand in front of him, “You’re very calm for being up here.”

"I still think a good, hard hit could make this thing come tumbling down,” Cullen groused.

Athena laughed at him, “We can get down now.”

Cullen took her hand and entwined his fingers through hers, “Good.”

They walked back to Cullen’s quarters in companionable silence. Once there Athena noticed a piece of paper underneath the couch in Cullen’s office. She thought she had picked up the letter Mia had sent her. She lifted up her pants leg to make sure the letter was still where she tucked it in her boot. 

Cullen asked, “What are you doing?”

Athena chuckled, blushing a little, "I remembered putting Mia’s letter in my boot, but there’s a piece of paper underneath the couch…”

Cullen practically dove under the couch to retrieve the errant paper, which sent Athena in to gales of laughter. Once he was standing again, he quickly folded the paper and put it in a locked drawer. Which had Athena laughing again, “Keeping secrets?”

Cullen blushed, “I’ll let you read it eventually.” Athena laughed again. “Is my embarrassment that amusing?” He growled coming closer to her.

“Yes, it is,” Athena said. The light of mirth in her violet eyes turned to one of seduction. They kissed, fortunately for Curly’s poor desk, they had enough sense to go upstairs before clothing got ripped off. 

Their love making was full of the thoughts and restlessness of the day, a mixture of hope and desperation. Athena slept fitfully, tossing and turning, waking up and going back to sleep about every hour. 

Cullen tried to sleep, but the nightmares came fast and furious, only these weren’t the nightmares of the past, they were of the future- A future where they failed- A future without Athena. Cullen slept for an hour and resigned himself to being awake for the rest of the night.

An hour before dawn Athena awoke and knew it was pointless to try and sleep. She saw Cullen sitting beside her and asked in voice that cracked with sleep, “Did you sleep at all?”

Cullen smiled sadly at her and whispered, "No."

Athena sat up, worry for him bringing her fully awake, “Cullen…”

“It’s not the first time I’ve had a sleepless night, it won’t be the last.” Cullen tried to ease her worry… It wasn’t working.

“But…” Athena stopped, still not willing to give voice to her fears.

“I have to move slower than you, I’m sure I will sleep from pure exhaustion tonight,” he could see in her eyes that she was still worried, “I’ll be fine.”

“I asked you once before to allow me to worry about you a little. Let me, please?”

“Not this time. You need to focus on the battle without any distractions or worry. You need to be successful and come back.” Cullen commanded.

“Then make sure I have a reason to come back,” Athena spoke like her words were ripped from her heart, ravaged and raw.

Cullen caressed her cheek with his hand and asked so quietly and softly it was barely more than a whisper, “Saving the world isn’t enough anymore?”

“Maker forgive me, and it’s incredibly selfish, but no… It’s not,” her voice cracked because of the tears she was fighting.   
Cullen crushed her to him and they made love, a promise that they would be successful and come back alive… And save the world.


	18. Chapter 18

Dawn lit the sky, chasing away the night. Everyone except the Chargers, Bull, and a few soldiers were ready to move out. Cullen and Athena walked to where everyone was gathered hand in hand. He walked her over to me, Dorian, and Cassandra. Cullen kissed her and whispered, “Be careful?”

Athena whispered back, “You too.” 

Cullen looked at the three of us in an unspoken agreement that we were to protect the Inquisitor, no matter what. And we went our separate ways, to meet up at different times in the Arbor Wilds.

The battle was intense, as it was the last and most devoted of the army of Corypheus. We fought corrupted grey wardens, red templars, and an ancient race of elves. Along the way we were encouraged by Nightingale and ordered by Curly to leave him to fight off several red templars by himself (we didn’t listen to that order. There were nights that Dorian and I wondered if Duchess’ and Curly’s love was all that was holding the world together.) We followed Corypheus and his general Samson in to the temple of Mythal. We witnessed Corypheus explode out of a dead grey warden body, and we allied with the ancient elves (guardians) of the temple.

Samson had said that he was going to be the vessel to carry the well of sorrows to Corypheus so he could use the Eluvian in the temple to get to the Fade. With the help of Dagna’s red lyrium rune, we were able to defeat Samson, thus thwarting Corypheus’ plans once again. 

Abelas (the leader of the ancient elves) warned that anyone that drank from the well would be tied to the will of Mythal forever. Morrigan was willing to make that sacrifice as she believed Mythal was a long dead goddess. 

The choices were either Athena or Morrigan, and I for one am glad Morrigan drank from the well instead of Athena. Almost right after Corypheus burst through the door and yelled no. 

Morrigan opened the eluvian and we ran through the mirror and back to Skyhold before Corypheus could attack. Once we all made it through, Morrigan locked her eluvian.

Now it was Athena’s turn to pace as she waited for Cullen to return. (They didn’t get the “joy” of traveling through an eluvian with an evil incarnate chasing them.) I was watching Athena pace when Sparkler came back from getting a much needed nap. Dorian quipped, “She needs rest.” 

“You think I haven’t told her that?” My frustration with Duchess was evident. “She looks at me like I’m speaking in dwarven.”

"She has bruises and a split lip, the Commander is not going to be happy. Why doesn’t she heal herself?” Sparkler wondered aloud, he knew he wasn’t going to get an answer.

“Can’t get her to eat either,” I complained.

“I’m going to talk to her,” Dorian said.

“Good, maybe she’ll listen to you,” I called after him.

Dorian tried pacing with her and talking to her, it didn’t work. So he tried to block her, that didn’t work either… At least until he threatened, “Athena, I will freeze you to the spot if you don’t stop.”

I chuckled, “I wish I had thought of that.”

Athena stood still… Well, as still as she could, she went from pacing to wringing her hands. Dorian grabbed her arms, “Athena, he’s fine. Most likely, he’s rushing to get back to you. Why aren’t you healing yourself?”

“Can’t.”

“Why ever not?” Dorian sounded exasperated by her answer.

“My powers don’t work that way,” she answered.

"Then go to another healer and have them do it,” he ordered.

“No.” Athena tried to pull from Dorian’s grip.

“Why not?” Dorian practically yelled.

“What if he needs me?” The fear that Cullen was hurt lurked in her violet eyes.

Dorian sighed, finally understanding, “He needs you to be healthy, rested, and ready to welcome him with open arms. Not bruised ones where he’s afraid to touch you.”

She became very still and said almost imperceptibly, “I’ll go.”

“Good. I’ll go with you,” Sparkler smiled brightly.

“I don’t need a babysitter,” Athena growled.

“We’re family, we watch out for each other,” Dorian smiled again. Off they went to get Athena healed, which took all of five minutes. 

Dorian motioned that they were going in to the keep to get food, so I followed as I was starving. I came in to hearing Dorian telling Athena, “Eat.”

“I’m not hungry,” Athena mulishly stated.

“So, you want to pass out on us again?” Dorian raised a haughty eyebrow at her.

“No.”

“Then eat.” Dorian put a plate of food in front of her. As she was eating, he told the maids to get a bath ready for her.

She stopped eating, "no."

“You want to greet your love with blood and gore all over you and in your hair?” Dorian asked.

“No.”

“Then you need a bath after you eat.” Sparkler put extra wattage on his smile.

She didn't eat much, but at least she ate. After Athena was done, she asked, “You’re not going to watch me bathe are you?”

“No!" Dorian gagged a little, “the only reason I went to the healers with you was to make sure that healing was all they did.”

Athena went up to bathe. Half an hour later she was done and heading out of the keep. Dorian quipped, “At least she’s clean.”

I chuckled, "Now how are you going to keep her from the gate?"

“I don’t know,” Dorian whined.

“You know, we’re in Skyhold, we shouldn’t have to chase her.” I said as Dorian and I went back out to... Keep Duchess company?

“Maybe you should take a nap,” Sparkler called over to her as we watched her pace in front of the main gate.

“No,” she called back to him.

“If you pass out on me again, so help me,” Sparkler sounded like a frustrated father scolding a wayward child.

“I’m not tired.”

“At least she’s talking to us,” I said, “it’s an improvement.”

“True.” Sparkler agreed.

“She’s also fed, clean, and healed.” I reminded him.

“True, again.” Sparkler paused, "I'd ask her to walk around the battlements, but I’m afraid she’d either trip down the stairs running or try to fly. Both of which would get her hurt.”

I chuckled, “Definitely not good ideas.”

“Athena, wouldn’t it be more romantic for him to find you in his bed?” Dorian thought he had found the perfect answer to this dilemma.

“No.” He was wrong.

“… And we’re back to the one word answers.” I quipped.

“What’s she doing?” Leliana appeared beside Dorian and causing us to jump.

“How’d you get in?” Sparkler recovered from his shock quickly, but he still had a hand over his heart.

“I have my ways,” Leliana smiled.

“She’s pacing,” I griped. I had been watching her pace for hours, “how far away is Curly?”

“About an hour,” Leliana chuckled.

"We have to watch her do this for another hour?" Dorian moaned.

Nightingale laughed, “It’s exhausting watching them worry, isn’t it?”

“We had to force her to go to a healer, force her to eat, and force her to take a bath. I’m exhausted, and Varric’s watched her pace since we got back.” Dorian complained.

“She was injured?”

“Bruises and a split lip only, Nightingale. We didn’t need both of them freaking out,” I said.

Leliana chuckled, "True. I'll go talk to her."

“Athena?” Leliana walked up to her, “Cullen is fine. He’s about an hour away.”

Athena hugged her, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Leliana walked away. Athena stopped pacing.

“That’s all you had to do, gentleman.” Nightingale smirked at us.

“She didn’t believe us,” I called after her. All we heard was Nightingale’s laughter.

“Athena, when the gates open, you’re going to get run over,” Sparkler said.

The wild look left her violet eyes and she smiled, “You’re right. Do you want to come wait with me up there?” Athena pointed to where the stairs turned to go into the keep.

“Gladly,” Sparkler and I said at the same time. We mounted the stairs and stood, waiting for the Commander to return. 

**

Curly took less than an hour to return, unlike us he didn’t have a spymaster to give him information on Athena’s whereabouts or if she was okay. The gates opened and he was about five minutes ahead of the troop he brought back to Skyhold. He dismounted and ran through the gates. Athena ran down the stairs and to him. As she ran into his arms he picked her up and spun her around. Sparkler and I went our separate ways, smiling.

“Were you hurt?” Cullen asked.

“Only a couple bruises.”

“But not anymore?”

“Dorian made me to go to a healer,” Athena blushed and inquired if he was hurt.

“No,” Cullen answered as they walked to his quarters so he could get out of being in full armor. He wondered why Athena was watching him so intently, “Is something wrong?”

Athena shook her head, “No, I just can’t take my eyes off of you right now.”

Cullen smiled and undressed faster. Once armor less he took hold of her hands and drew her to him, whispered, “We won,” and kissed her. The kiss turned into more, so much more. 

After they made love Athena laid her head on his chest to listen to his heart beat, and sighed contentedly. Cullen smiled, “Happy?”

“I’m always happy when I’m with you,” Athena smiled, not moving, “And you?”

“And me what?” He teased.

“Cullen!” Athena lightly swatted at his bare chest.

He chuckled, “Of course I’m happy. I’m in love with an amazing and caring woman.” Cullen wondered if Athena was blushing, and then she started to move. He couldn’t help but think and I’m the one that gets teased for being a workhorse, “Where are you going?”

“I’m just sitting up,” Athena laughed.

"Why?" Curly had been very comfortable with Duchess using his chest as a pillow.

“Because I don’t want to fall asleep yet.” 

“I can help with that,” Cullen leaned on an elbow and kissed her, which turned into them making love again. During the night it briefly rained, and there was a sizable hole in Cullen’s bedchamber. The rain soaked the clothes that had been abandoned on the floor.

**

The next morning our lovers were eager to talk to Leliana and Josephine. As they walked into the main hall applause went up from the crowd. Athena blushed and smiled. With a brief wave, they disappeared into Ruffles’ office on their way to the war room.

“When you went in to the temple and Corypheus followed you, they stopped fighting,” Cullen said once everyone was assembled around the war table.

“If Corypheus is smart he will hide and rebuild.” Leliana said.

“Corypheus will not hide,” Morrigan said.

“Then how do we defeat him?” Athena asked, anxious for the war to be over.

"I'm still sifting through the voices from the well. There is an answer, I just have to find it,” Morrigan glanced at Athena.

“Do you think it might have anything to do with him being able to use dead bodies?” Athena asked.

“I know not, but it may have been why the Grey Wardens imprisoned him instead of trying to kill him. They knew he could do this, but not how,” Morrigan answered.

"It was still a victory.” Josephine added.

“Agreed, Josephine.” Curly said.

“I believe that is all until we figure out a way to defeat Corypheus,” Leliana dismissed the meeting. As they left, Curly took Athena’s hand and they came to sit with us for breakfast.

“Enjoying your success, Duchess?” I asked.

“If you mean our success, yes, I am,” Athena said. I chuckled. We ate quietly until Dorian arrived. Athena put down her fork when Sparkler sat down, “I wanted to apologize for yesterday.”

“Which part?” Dorian asked.

“Pretty much everything since we got back to Skyhold,” Athena blushed. Cullen looked at her bewildered, she responded, “I wasn’t very nice.”

“I’m guessing there wasn’t much talking going on last night?” I asked. They both blushed, Sparkler and I laughed.

“She paced for several hours and wouldn’t believe a word I said,” I started. I wasn’t going to let her off that easy.

“I had to guilt her to go to a healer, guilt her to eat, and guilt her in to taking a bath! I felt like I was my mother, and then she went back to pacing!” Dorian complained.

“She would have continued to pace, had Nightingale not talked to her. We told you that Curly was fine.” I reprimanded her.

“I’m just glad one of her powers isn’t flying, because I would have had to freeze her to the spot instead of just threaten it.” Sparkler grumbled.

I chuckled, “Gotta admit, that was pretty funny.”

“She was absolutely frantic with worry,” Dorian said.

By the end Athena was bright red and looking down at her hands, Curly whispered in her ear, “I love you, too.”

Now that Sparkler and I got her to blush, I moved on, “Any plans for the day?” 

“To see if Tommy is still here. Other than that, spending the day with Cullen,” Athena glanced at Cullen to see if he had any input and saw that he was smiling at her.

“Aww…” Sparkler and I teased.

Cullen finished eating with a blush from being caught staring, “Are you ready?”

Athena nodded, “Take care, gentlemen.”

Our lovers went out to the garden to find Mother Giselle. When Mother Giselle spotted them, she walked over to them, “Inquisitor, I am very glad to hear you were successful.”

“Thank you, Mother Giselle. Tommy went with his parents?” Athena tried to hide the slight hitch in her voice. She already knew the answer considering the boy didn’t try to tackle her the moment she entered the garden.

“He did, it was his desire to go. He did ask me to give you this though,” Mother Giselle handed her a folded up piece of paper with curled ends. 

Opening the paper Cullen and Athena saw that it was a drawing made by Tommy. It had pictures of Athena and Tommy holding hands, Tommy eating a brownie, Athena giving him a brownie, a nug, and Athena and Cullen kissing. 

Athena had tears in her eyes when she said, “Thank you.”

"You're welcome." Mother Giselle quietly left.

Cullen directed Athena to a hidden bench so she could compose herself. After sitting quietly for a couple minutes, Athena let out a shaky sigh and asked, “What are you thinking about?”

Curly sighed, not liking the dark turn his thoughts had taken, "If my life had gone differently… If I hadn’t joined the Inquisition… I might have become one of the Red Templars, I probably knew some of them… And I wouldn’t have found you,” he paused, placing his hand on her cheek, “Do you ever wonder where you would be had you not gone in to the Conclave?”

“And not find the man I had a crush on when I was younger and get to fall in love with him again?”

Cullen chuckled and nodded. Athena continued, “Not really, no. I sound incredibly selfish don’t I?"

“Not at all,” Cullen smiled at her and kissed her.

Dorian cleared his throat. Athena sighed in frustration at being interrupted, “Yes, Dorian.”

“This came for you. And you two are adorable!” Dorian’s grin was wide.

Athena blushed and took the letter from him, “Don’t you have plans to set more curtains on fire?”

Dorian's eyes narrowed and huffed off, “I happen to like my curtains!”

Athena chuckled (she always liked tormenting Dorian. They still wage word wars in their letters,) and opened the letter:

Dear Daughter,  
I hope you don’t mind me calling you that. I was very happy to hear from Dorian that you are interested in meeting with me, and I will come at my earliest convenience. Lydia was the love of my life. I am very sorry that we kept the truth from you. Dorian does not stop singing your praises. He even tells me that you’re in love with the Commander of the Inquisition, I sincerely hope that he treats you well. I cannot wait to see you again.  
With Love,  
Arthur Pauvis

Athena smiled through her tears. Curly read over her shoulder again, and put an arm around her. She leaned in to him and sighed, grateful for his quiet support. They sat there, just enjoying being together, in the garden until lunch. (BORING!)

During lunch Sparkler started asking questions about the letter, “What did it say?”

"That he couldn't wait to see me and that he was sorry that they didn’t tell me the truth,” Athena said.

“Did he say when he was coming?” Dorian asked.

“He said at his earliest convenience,” Athena chuckled, “I’m starting to think your more excited for this than I am.”

“That could mean he’ll be here tomorrow. I am excited. My uncle’s a good man, he tried, unsuccessfully, but he did try to dissuade my father from how he acted toward me. Last I heard he still disagrees with my father,” Dorian responded.

After Cullen finished eating, he stood, kissed Athena, and as he was leaving, “I have a meeting to get to. It shouldn’t be long.” 

“That was abrupt…” I found it odd that Cullen rushed off, especially since Athena was mostly free.

Athena shrugged helplessly and turned her attention to Sparkler, “What are your plans for the day?”

“I have a date,” Dorian waggled his brows and left.

“They trust me alone with you,” I teased.

Athena laughed, “It has been a while hasn’t it?”

“It has at that, Duchess,” I smiled, “interested in a game of Wicked Grace?”

Athena smiled and nodded. When the game ended, Curly still wasn’t back. I shuffled the cards and glanced at the doorway, “I’m thinking his meeting is taking a bit longer than expected.”

“It seems that way…” Athena trailed off. 

"Want to go look for him?”

“Yes and no,” Athena remembered all too well the last time she tried to look for Curly. 

I laughed, “At least he didn’t walk by you this time.”

Athena laughed, “True.” She paused, glancing at the door, “I think I will go look for him.”

Cullen was easy to find this time since he was in his office, and it was the first place Athena looked. When she opened the door he was pacing like a caged animal. Athena asked, “Cullen?”

He stopped pacing, looked at her and blushed, "Forgive me, I wanted to calm down before I came back to you.”

Athena closed the door, and asked, “What happened?”

“How do you feel about the eluvian being here?” Curly returned to pacing.

“I hadn’t really given it much thought until we needed to use it to get back from the Arbor Wilds. It came in pretty handy then.” Athena watched him pace.

“You’re not afraid of others following through?”

“The way Morrigan explained it was that each Eluvian has a specific key, and that key is needed to open it. The way I understood it was that Morrigan was the only one in possession of the key for the one here.” Athena leaned against his desk.

"When I asked her about it, the explanation given to me consisted of words no bigger than four letters. I’m a reasonably well read man, and I am not unreasonable. I just had concerns.” Cullen said. Athena’s mouth twitched in a poor attempt to hide her amusement. Cullen wasn't amused, “and you’re laughing at me!”

Athena chuckled, “I’m not laughing at you. I find it sweet that you care so much. According to Leliana, that is how Morrigan has always been, at least until she had Kieran. She gives everyone a hard time.”

“Has she given you a hard time?” 

“She hasn’t given me as hard a time as others. It’s just how she is, and she doesn’t intend to stay. The Eluvian will go with her when she leaves.” Athena saw the unvoiced worry in his brown eyes.

"Not interested in keeping it?" Cullen teased, now that his mind was eased.

“No.”

Cullen kissed her, “You’re amazing, you know that?” 

“Because I’m not interested in an ancient elven door that can lead to anywhere?” Athena chuckled.

Cullen chuckled as well, "No, because you always try to see the best in people, and accept them as they are."

Athena winked at him, “I can live with that one.”

“Good,” Curly lifted her up on the desk and kissed her… It’s a good thing that desk is so sturdy. One would almost think it was dwarven made with the improper use of it.


	19. Chapter 19

Laying in Curly’s bed together, Athena got curious about Cullen’s parents, “You never really talk about your parents…”

“There’s not much to tell,” Cullen responded.

“Why not?”

“They passed away during the Blight,” Cullen’s voice was quiet.

“Oh, Cullen, I’m sorry,” Athena hugged him.

He smiled sadly, “I should have stayed in touch with them more than I did. Why do you ask?”

“I wanted to know what I was up against when…” Athena paused, as the war with Corypheus intruded on her thoughts. Survival was still uncertain, “…if I meet your family.”

Cullen hugged her, understanding the reason for the pause and the if. 

To break the thoughts of a possibly bleak future, Athena sat up. Thinking that was the only thing she was doing Curly let her, and then she got out of bed. Cullen sat up and asked, “What are you doing?”

Athena put on Cullen’s shirt and teased, “Going downstairs to look for more letters from Mia.”

Curly jumped out of bed like it was on fire. He chased Athena, caught her easily, and ordered huskily, “No, you are not.”

“Aww, come on, please?” Athena’s violet eyes lit with a passion unrelated to searching out letters.

“No,” Cullen reiterated before he kissed her. 

And then there was a knock at the door. Both of them groaned. Athena started to take off Cullen’s shirt to get dressed. He stopped her, “Maker! If you take that off now, I won’t be able to make them go away.”

Athena chuckled and left the shirt on. He threw pants on, kissed her quickly, and went down to answer the door. The person at the door informed him that Samson had been brought to Skyhold for judgement. Cullen thanked him and shut the door. He put his hands on the door and hung his head.

Athena came down still wearing Cullen's shirt, and saw him looking defeated. Without a word, she went over to him, took hold of his hand, and led him back upstairs. They picked up where they had left off, but there was a touch of sadness and desperation to their love making now.

There was no cuddling after their love making as the war had intruded on their break from it. Once they were both fully clothed, Cullen informed her quietly, “Samson’s here for judgement.”

“Cullen, talk to me?” Athena implored.

Cullen walked over to her and held her, “I don’t want to influence your judgement.”

Athena broke from his embrace a little so she could look at him, “Even if I wasn't in love with you, I would be seeking your opinion on this. You’re the expert here, not me.”

“He betrayed everything I thought the Templar Order stood for and yet he had such loyalty from those that followed him. Maddox gave his life to protect him…” Cullen paused, “And I can’t help thinking that If I had stayed as angry as I was after the Fereldan Circle fell, I would have become him.”

“Why do you think that?” Athena asked as gently as she could.

“Athena-" Cullen stopped, “Are you sure you want the answer to this?”

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.” 

“After I was tortured, I wanted revenge, not justice. I didn’t care if innocents were hurt. I thought that all the mages of the Fereldan circle deserved…” Cullen stopped, fighting tears, “…to die. I even begged Selene to kill them…”

Even though Cullen had stopped holding Athena and was now pacing, Athena stood in the same exact spot, not moving. She asked, barely above a whisper, “What stopped you?”

“She didn’t agree with me… I was very angry with her for a while too.” Cullen was barely hanging on to his emotions.

"That's what Selene did. If you were so bent on revenge, why didn’t you go back? Why didn’t you hunt them down?”

“Because I followed the orders from my superiors…” Cullen stopped pacing and hung his head, “and because I wanted to forget that the damn thing had ever happened.”

Athena walked over to him, put her arms around him, and laid her head on his chest, “It sounds to me like you wanted to move on.”

“How…?” Cullen asked brokenly. His arms hung in midair, afraid to touch her.

“Because you’re a good man,” Athena tightened her hug, “and I love you.”

Cullen closed his eyes, letting the tears fall, and wrapped his arms around her. The call that dinner was served went up shortly after that. 

Athena had finally managed to get Cullen to sit down and neither of them were really in the mood for extra company. Athena asked, “Are you hungry?” Cullen shook his head. “Are you sure?” 

Cullen cracked half a smile, “You don’t have to do this.”

Athena tilted her head, “Let me take care of you for a change.”

Cullen closed his eyes and whispered to himself, “I don’t deserve you.”

Athena heard him, "We’ll continue that conversation when I get back.”

Athena came in to the main hall to get two plates of food. Ruffles saw and said, “I can have someone bring dinner to the Commander’s quarters.”

“Thank you, but it’s better this way.”

“Is everything okay?” Josephine asked.

“We just need some time alone.” Athena answered.

“If there’s anything I can help with…” Ruffles trailed off.

“I know, Josie, thank you,” Athena left with food for her and Cullen.

“What was that about?” Leliana asked.

“I’m not sure. I thought it was odd that Athena was getting food for the Commander and herself,” Josephine responded.

“Samson’s here,” Leliana said. Josephine nodded in understanding.

**

Cullen was able to compose himself a little while she was gone. She put their dinner on the table Curly normally used for chess, and tilted her head. They ate dinner without much talk. Athena was thinking on how best to bring up his comment about not deserving her and Curly was still thinking he didn’t deserve her because of his past (he’s pretty good at beating himself up.)   
Once they were both finished eating Athena said, “Cullen, I’m not perfect…”

“Have you ever wanted to hurt someone just because you could?” 

“These days I’ve been doing it on an almost daily basis and then there’s Kern.” Athena sighed wearily.

“You’re fighting to save the world every day, that’s what war is. And as for Kern…” Cullen stopped, closing off his emotions. He still wanted to put Kern through a wall.

“He isn’t the only one, he had friends that I dislike and all because they were friends with him. Would I hurt them, given the chance? Hopefully not, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want to. How is the torture you went through not considered an act of war?” Athena did not like that Cullen still thought he didn’t deserve love or happiness because of his past.

“Because I was supposed to protect them, what happened in Fereldan should not have influenced how I treated the mages in Kirkwall.”

“And the mages in Fereldan weren’t supposed to torture you, but they did, and they were wrong." Athena choked up, “You also aren’t the same man from ten years ago, and you never acted on your desire for revenge. Why don’t you see this as a good thing? Please don’t ever again say that you don’t deserve me, because it’s simply not true.” Athena finished her speech crying.

“Athena…” Cullen choked up as well. Instead of attempting to talk, he got up from the table and kissed her. Athena grabbed a hold of him like he was her only source of air. Which was rewarded by Curly crushing her to him… This time they made it upstairs before the clothes came off.

After their desire was spent Athena whispered, “You never could have become like Samson, and it’s because of this,” she kissed his chest where she could hear his heart beat. And then she fell asleep. 

Cullen held her for a while thinking on all she said, amazed at her faith and love for him.

They slept peacefully (which is saying a lot considering how much the past was talked about.) Athena was up with the sun. She got dressed and went downstairs so she wouldn’t wake Curly. She was thinking about what to do with Samson as he could have very valuable information regarding Corypheus, and she felt that the only one Samson would talk to would be Cullen. But based on how Cullen felt that he could have turned into Samson, she wasn’t sure she could ask him to interrogate Samson.

“You’re deep in thought,” Cullen said quietly as he stepped off the ladder.

Athena jumped, startled, and blushed, “I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?” Cullen sat across from her at the table.

“For yesterday,” Athena knew that his past was a painful and almost nightly reminder for him.

“You have every right to ask about my past. I just wish that it was a more pleasant past,” Cullen half smiled at her and took Athena’s hand that was laying on the table. “What were you thinking about?”

“Samson and what to do with him. I can’t help thinking that he has useful information about Corypheus. But I don’t think he’ll respond to anyone but you.” 

“You’ve made your decision?” Cullen knew this was an option, and he was strangely okay with it.

“No…” Athena glanced away from him.

“Why not?” 

“Because I don’t want Samson to do or say something that would hurt you,” Athena looked back at Cullen, and worry haunted her violet eyes.

“I’m certain I can handle whatever Samson decides to throw at me,” Cullen felt a little insulted.

Athena closed her eyes, she botched that well and good, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that you couldn’t handle him…” She opened her eyes with tears shining in them, “I want to protect you from anything that could hurt you, and I can’t.”

“Athena, it’s not your responsibility to protect me,” Cullen assured her.

Athena shook her head, disagreeing with him, “I always thought that loving someone meant that you were willing to protect them from harm, among many other things.”

Curly caressed her cheek, “You’re right, it is.”

They were interrupted by a knock on the door. Athena chuckled. Curly groaned and went to open the door. 

Ruffles sent breakfast to them, with tables, linens, and silver platters holding a four course meal. Athena was stunned, “How can she think we’re going to be able to eat all this?”

Cullen chuckled, “I’ll give the rest to the soldiers.”

The servants readied their plates and served our lovers. As the servants left, one of the servants said, “Your Worship, the Ambassador thinks you eat far too little and says that she will be serving the private meals from now on.” 

Curly laughed and Athena glared at him which had him laughing more, “I happen to agree with her.”

Athena gasped, outraged, "I eat enough to fill me.”

“You had one thing on your plate last night.”

“I wasn’t hungry,” Athena grumbled.

“And what of all the meals you forget? Or don’t join?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her. Athena blushed as he continued, “Leliana isn’t the only one to get reports on you anymore. In truth, Varric and Dorian have always volunteered far more information than was needed.”

Athena closed her eyes with bright red cheeks and fiercely whispered, “I’m going to kill them.”

Cullen laughed, “I’m going to have to thank Josephine for this.”

“Dorian or Varric probably put her up to it. She eats less than me.”

Curly laughed again, “No, she doesn’t. She only does that so you don’t feel alone. When you’re not here…”

"Why does my eating or lack there of matter so much?" Athena was at a complete loss as to why we cared so much.

“Because you need your strength,” Cullen said quietly, seriously. He would brook no arguments on Athena needing to care for herself, especially since they were so close to hopefully winning this war.

“It’s still foolish to starve oneself so that the person that fills up on less doesn’t feel left out,” Athena groused.

Cullen laughed in agreement. A little while later, Athena was pushing the food around on her plate with her fork. Cullen saw and started to chastise, “Athena…”

Athena looked up and exclaimed, “I’m not hungry! I’ve never been even a moderate eater.”

Cullen tried not to laugh and failed, “Lydia yelled at you too?”

“Maker, yes! For a while it was an every meal thing, and she would threaten to take my books away if I didn’t eat to her liking. When I got sick, that stopped. I guess she felt guilty…” Athena shrugged, “I’ve always been a light eater, it’s not a new thing or because of the anchor.”

Cullen shook his head, a smile twitching at his lips. Athena asked, “What?”

“You’re impossible, beautiful, intelligent, and kind, but impossible.” Cullen answered, getting Athena to blush. His smile grew wide before he quickly hid it and changed the subject. “What are your plans for the day?”

“Dealing with Samson and talking to Morrigan to see if she’s figured anything out yet.”

“I’m sorry,” Cullen quipped.

“For what?” Duchess was confused.

“I would not wish Morrigan on my worst enemy,” Cullen said. And no, he was not teasing.

Athena moved so she could sit on his lap, kissed him, and said huskily, “You are kinder than me, because I would.” 

Cullen said “thank you” with a kiss.

**

Ruffles normally brought the prisoners before Athena to be judged, but this time, understandably, it was Cullen. It was odd seeing them together this way, there were no looks of passion, no secret smiles, and no blushing (boring.) 

Samson revealed that he lied to the Templars he recruited about red lyrium and said that the chantry had fed the Templars lies as well. Athena decided it was best to have Cullen question Samson. Samson said that he would cooperate. When Samson was led away there was a brief smile between the lovers, and then they went their separate ways. Athena to talk with Morrigan and Curly to talk with Samson.

When Athena went to talk with Morrigan, she saw Leliana standing beside the Eluvian saying that Kieran went through the Eluvian and that Morrigan followed him. Athena went through the Eluvian as well and ended up in the Fade. 

She quickly ran into Morrigan who was very emotional, asked Athena for help in finding Kieran, and she didn’t think Kieran could open the Eluvian. When they found Kieran, they also found Morrigan’s mom, Flemeth who has the spirit of Mythal in her. Morrigan was told by Flemeth that within Morrigan was the way to match Corypheus. Everyone but Flemeth (she stayed in the Fade) returned to Skyhold safely. When Kieran wasn’t going to run away again, they went to the war room to talk. 

Morrigan said that Corypheus’ dragon was not a true archdemon as he had put a part of himself in it. Morrigan said she could match the power of the dragon, but Corypheus was up to Athena. Morrigan left, Athena stayed and asked, “Was Samson willing to talk?”

"He verified what Morrigan said. The way to defeat Corypheus is through his dragon. However he had no ideas on how to destroy it easily.” Cullen said.

“I guess the next step is finding him… Or his dragon,” Leliana said. Everyone else was silent in agreement.

As they left the war room, Ruffles asked, “Did you enjoy breakfast?”

“Very much so, yes,” Curly was quick to respond. 

Athena narrowed her eyes at Cullen’s response, “It was very nice, Josie, but worrying about what I eat or don’t eat is not a stress you need.”

“Finally, some sense…” Leliana griped.

"The Inquisitor should not be serving herself...or anyone else for that matter,” Ruffles looked at Athena, “I saw what you took for dinner, and you had one thing on your plate last night. Unacceptable!”

"Josie, I have always been a light eater, it's not going to change, and we didn’t have servants in the Circle, we always had to get our own food. I’m used to it.” Athena explained.

“You shouldn’t be, you’re nobility!” Josephine said. 

Athena mouthed to Leliana, “Help!”

“Josie, let the woman eat and serve herself as she pleases. Like the Inquisitor said, there are more important things to worry about. Like getting Dorian new drapes… Again.” Leliana said.

“How often have we had to replace his drapes?” Athena was incredulous. She had honestly thought this had stopped happening.

“I think someone was trying to play a prank on Dorian.” Leliana guessed.

“We're the drapes from Tevinter?” Athena asked.

“Yes…” Ruffles said.

“It was Bull,” Athena said with absolute certainty.

“Why?” Leliana and Josephine asked.

“To torment Dorian,” Athena answered, “After Bull found out I was related to Dorian, he told me about little pranks he would pull on Dorian. It would always be the stuff from Tevinter, just to watch Dorian flip out because Bull thought it was funny.”

“Those two are something else. Dorian told me he does the same thing to Bull’s stuff,” Curly said. All three ladies looked at him wide eyed, waiting for an explanation, “Dorian and I play chess quite often.”

“Oh, Maker,” was all that was heard from Athena.

Leliana went over to Athena and hugged her, “Athena, I am so sorry.” 

Ruffles giggled a little. Leliana looked at her, trying to stifle a laugh of her own, “It's not funny.”

“It is, a little,” Ruffles grinned.

“What has he told you?” Athena was bright red, imagining all the things Dorian let slip.

“Oh nothing much,” Curly smirked.

“I don’t believe that for an instant,” Athena’s blush somehow intensified.

Leliana perched herself on Ruffles’ desk. Ruffles stood beside her. The ladies were enjoying the show.

“Why don’t you believe me?”

“Because I know how he is when he loses,” Athena said.

“And how would you know that?” Cullen suddenly felt uneasy.

“We play Wicked Grace together, and I’m getting quite proficient at beating him at it,” Athena answered. Ruffles hid a secret smile that Leliana picked up on, and Nightingale raised an eyebrow at her. Athena didn’t notice and continued, “So, back to my question, what has he told you?”

Curly ignored her question and asked one of his own. His unease was growing, “Who else have you been playing Wicked Grace with?”

“Varric and Josephine mostly,” a look of abject terror came over Curly’s face with Athena’s answer. Which had all three women laughing so hard they could barely breathe.

When Ruffles was able to speak she smiled, “I’m just making sure you lose to the right woman this time, Commander.”

Cullen covered his face with his hands and mumbled, “I’m never playing Wicked Grace again.” All three women laughed again.   
After Curly recovered, he asked Athena, “When was I going to hear about you fighting a high dragon?”

Athena hesitated, thinking. She tried to remember if she told him, “I didn’t tell you?”

“I wouldn’t be asking if you had.”

“I’m sorry, I meant to tell you," Athena said softly, “I had asked Leliana and Josephine to not tell you because I meant to tell you when I came back."

Cullen turned swiftly to look at Duchess’s accomplices (previously gazing at Athena,) “You knew?!”

“Of course I knew,” Leliana chuckled.

"Commander, what would you have done if you had known before hand?" Ruffles asked.

“I would have found a way to go with her,” Cullen said quietly, bowing his head.

Athena walked up to him, entwined her hands in his and looking up at him, she said just as quietly, “No, you were needed here.”

Leliana and Josephine looked at each other, Leliana said, “Go, spend some time together.”

“Shall we?” Cullen asked Athena.

She smiled in answer and waved at Ruffles and Nightingale, and they left for Cullen’s quarters. As they arrived they saw Dorian waiting outside. Sparkler saw their confused looks and asked, “Chess?”

“Is it that time already?” Cullen asked.

“I’ve been waiting here for about fifteen minutes,” Dorian said.

“We were talking about you,” Athena teased Dorian.

“While I’m honored that I’m being discussed in the war room, aren’t there more deadly things to talk about?” Sparkler asked.

They walked inside Cullen’s office, and Curly asked Sparkler, “Your drapes got destroyed again?” 

Dorian’s smirk left and he grumbled, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

"Do you mind if we play a game?" Cullen asked Athena.

“Not at all,” Athena smiled at him.

“And before you start going through my stuff, Mia’s letters are on my desk. How did you find time to write her?” Curly asked.

Athena smiled, “Oh, good.”

“That’s not an answer.” Cullen said as he and Dorian set up the chess board.

“You’re not getting one,” Athena picked up her letter.

Cullen shook his head. Dorian responded, “She’s utterly impossible these days. She used to be so sweet, and would hang on my every word.”

As Athena started to go up to the bedroom to read her letter in semi-private, she turned and said, “Dorian, I adore you. I’m glad we're related, but, no.”

“I know, I know, you were already in love with the Commander.” Dorian moaned.

Athena rolled her eyes at Sparkler and continued up. Curly asked, “Where are you going?”

“To read my letter,” Athena was confused as to why it mattered if she went upstairs, but she decided not to question Curly on it in front of her cousin. She came down the ladder and looked at the desk, smiled, and started shifting things off of the desk.

“Athena!" Curly exclaimed.

“I’m not looking through them, I’m just moving them,” She left one pile of papers on the desk as a pillow and promptly laid down on the desk and opened her letter. 

Curly and Sparkler stared at her. This was a side of her that they had not yet seen. Dorian recovered first and made the first move in the game, “Your move, Commander.”

Curly tried to look at the chess board, he really did, but he just couldn’t do it… That is until she looked at him from her letter and smiled at him. Curly closed his eyes and mumbled, “I really don’t want to know what’s in that letter.” Cullen finally made a move, and then they heard Athena turning the letter and Curly paled. 

Dorian looked at him with widened eyes, “it’s more than one page…” Then made a move.

And that’s pretty much how the chess game went as Mia’s letter to Athena was several pages long. When Athena would chuckle or laugh, Cullen would lose concentration on the game.

In the letter, Mia talked of Curly’s childhood and how he was always quieter and more reserved than the rest of them, and that if he had any sense he would have already taken Athena to his favorite place as a child. Mia thanked her for the permission to call Athena by her name instead of “Inquisitor.” Mia asked if Athena could teach Curly how to write letters, as she learned more about him from Athena than she ever does from him. She also reiterated that she couldn’t wait to meet Athena.

“Well, that’s check mate, Commander. I think I’m going to have to get Athena to torment you more often when we play chess,” Dorian smirked.

“Ha ha, Dorian,” Cullen said without humor.

“Same time tomorrow?” 

Athena looked at them from the last page of the letter, “Is this a daily thing?”

“You providing a stunning distraction for the Commander? No. It was quite fun winning against you, Commander. And yes, Athena, when time allows. Be good you two.” Dorian left. 

Athena was reading the last paragraph when Curly came over and took the letter out of her hands. Athena exclaimed as she reached for the letter, “I’m almost done!”

Cullen dropped it on the floor, “It can wait.” And climbed on top of the desk and Athena, kissing her.

When the kiss ended, Athena said huskily, “I’m sorry you lost your game.”

“I lost because of you,” Cullen took off his shirt.

“I wanted to go upstairs,” Athena smirked, running her hands over his chest.

“That’s still not an option,” Cullen’s voice was low and seductive. He kissed her and made love to her with all of the pent up desire he had been feeling during the chess match. The paper pillow was a casualty to their love making, and that desk has to be dwarven made for all the undesk like things it’s used for.

They did eventually make it up to the bedroom, after cuddling for a while Athena got out of bed and put on Curly’s shirt to go down and get Mia’s letter. 

Cullen shook his head at her. He found it amazing that she wanted to continue reading a letter from his sister. He was also worried as to what Mia had said, but didn’t want to ask for fear of what he would find out.

“I was on the last paragraph,” Athena explained as she went to find Mia’s letter. When she came back, Athena laid down beside Cullen with his shirt still on and letter in hand.

“I will need that shirt back eventually…” Cullen was hoping to distract her again.

Athena didn’t respond until she read the end of the letter, “You’ll get it back.”

“Do I want to know how embarrassing that letter is?”

“She talked mostly of what you were like as a kid and asked me to teach you how to write letters,” Athena teased.

“Why did you write her?” Cullen groaned.

“To thank her for writing to me.” 

"You will be getting letters daily now,” Cullen warned.

“I’m okay with that,” Athena smiled at him.

“You would be,” Curly chuckled.

“I love you, and Mia seems very nice.”

"She is, and I love you too.” Cullen responded before he kissed her again.

There was a knock on the door, and a voice said, “Commander, are you okay?”

Cullen looked confused for a second and then swore, "The meeting for the forces still in the Arbor Wilds!” Curly sat up suddenly, almost knocking Athena off the bed, “I’m going to need that shirt back now.”

Athena started to take the shirt off, Curly stopped her, saying, “No… don’t… I’ll just get another one.” 

"I can take it off…” Athena wondered why he changed his mind.

He kissed her, briefly, but with a lot of passion, and then pulled another shirt out of his trunk, “I need to go to this meeting… I should have been there already considering I planned it. If you take that shirt off,” Cullen paused to glance at her. It was clear as to what he was thinking, “I’m not going anywhere.” 

Athena blushed, “Is the meeting downstairs?” 

“No, it’s not… Thankfully,” Cullen responded.

Athena smiled as Curly hurriedly kissed her. Athena said to his hastily retreating back, “I hope the meeting goes well.” Athena finally took his shirt off and hung it on the bed post not wanting to put it in with the clean clothing, but not sure where he put his dirty clothes. When Athena was dressed in her own clothes she went down to put all the piles of papers back on Curly’s desk and left a note saying, “I went to the main hall. No, I did not read through any of the papers. Love, Athena”

When Athena entered she saw Ruffles, Sparkler, and I playing Wicked Grace. I asked, “Would you like to join in, Duchess?”

“I would love to,” Athena sat beside Ruffles.

“Leliana told me the Commander was late to his meeting,” Josephine said.

Athena chuckled, “Yes, he was.”

“And what were you doing to distract him?” I asked.

“I finished reading my letter from his sister and we were just talking.”

“Talking was not what he had in mind when I defeated him in chess,” Sparkler added.

Athena blushed, “We were just talking when someone knocked on the door.”

We played no stakes Wicked Grace to give Athena pointers (mostly from Ruffles.) When Sparkler grumbled, “I wish someone could distract you two as well as Athena distracted the Commander today.”

“All I was doing was reading!” 

“Yes, laying on the Commander’s desk with your hair spilling like a waterfall down its side. A pillow of papers…” Dorian described.

“I like laying down when I read, and I wasn’t allowed to go upstairs,” Athena complained. She was still utterly confused as to why Cullen didn’t want her upstairs. It’s not like the hole in the roof was getting fixed.

“How is it possible that you don’t know…” Dorian stopped and gasped, “Have you not...?” 

Athena’s blush was all we needed as an answer.

“No!” Ruffles exclaimed looking at Athena. Athena’s blush got brighter.

“Why weren’t you allowed to go upstairs?” I wanted to give poor Duchess a reprieve.

“Because I have a habit of reading things Cullen doesn’t want me to. In all honesty, all I’m interested in are his letters from his sister, but it wasn’t like he wouldn’t have heard me moving around and I already had a letter from Mia so…” Athena paused, “it’s an excellent question. If you find out, please let me know?”

I laughed, “I think I can manage that.”

“I want to know how and why our dear Commander was your first,” Sparkler said.

“Is that really any of your business?” Athena asked.

“Yes,” all three of us answered.

Athena looked away to hide her embarrassment, “The couple people I had an interest in didn’t return the interest. Other than Kern, no one else showed any interest. I would have killed him before he could ever lay a hand on me in that way.”

“As beautiful, intelligent, and kind as you are, how is that possible?” Dorian sounded as though he was offended on her behalf.

Athena’s cheeks became stained with pink again, “I spent most of my life in the circle. Everyone there knew I was a favorite of the knight-commander and first enchanter… If they had an interest they stayed far away.”

“So, the Commander was your first kiss?” Ruffles asked. Athena nodded, “does he know?” Athena shook her head, blushing, “Maker! Why didn’t you tell him?”

“It never came up. It’s not a big deal,” Athena let her hair fall in front of her face, hiding herself from us. 

“It most certainly is! It's so sweet and kind and romantic!” Ruffles gushed, "What about the Templar you had a crush on when you were younger, nothing from him?”

“You mean the former Templar I’m in love with now?” 

“No, I mean the Templar… Wait… What?!” Josephine exclaimed, just realizing what Duchess said. Athena laughed. Ruffles gasped, “How did you not recognize each other immediately?” 

“He was only there for a couple days and I never saw him without his helmet on,” Athena paused, blushing.

“It’s almost like you’re star-crossed lovers,” I said.

“No! Please don’t say that!” Athena exclaimed.

“Why not? It’s all incredibly romantic,” Ruffles asked.

“I’ve never heard of star-crossed lovers having happy endings,” Athena quietly stated.

“But it does seem as though you two were destined to be together, and if my opinion counts for anything, the Maker owes both of you,” I said. At that point Curly stood behind Athena, seemingly coming from nowhere, I asked, “Care to join us, Curly?”

Athena’s eyes widened, and then she closed them very tight. Blushing profusely, she groaned, “How long have you been here?”

Curly chuckled, "Long enough."

Athena sighed and griped, "I may read letters from your sister, but at least I don’t listen in on your conversations. I wish I knew who taught you to walk silently.”

Cullen laughed and sat down beside her, “I taught myself, much easier to get around if the enemy can’t hear you.”

“Commander, how much exactly did you hear?” Sparkler was angling for something, but I wasn’t sure what. 

“Enough,” Curly slowly smiled, giving nothing away.

“And here I was hoping to be able to distract you at chess again tomorrow,” Dorian sighed despondently. 

Athena’s eyes flew open and with deadly precision, threw a napkin at his face. “With the sound trouncing I got from the Ambassador and my cousin, plus my cousin trying to murder me with her eyes, I take my leave.” Dorian bowed and left.

Curly looked at the table and noticed the cards, paled, and said, “No.”

“Oh, yes, Commander, and it has just become even more fun to teach Athena how to win.” Ruffles sighed and stood, “I must get back to work.”

As we watched Ruffles leave, I ordered, “Get out of here you two.”

Athena gaped at me for a moment. She was surprised that I wasn’t asking for more of what she considered embarrassing details, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, go,” I chuckled. I would investigate all of this later when Curly wasn’t around.

“You heard the man,” Cullen grabbed Athena’s hand and pulled her to her feet. Instead of going to Curly’s quarters they went to Athena’s. After he closed the door, he kissed her with so much heat and passion, Athena felt like she would melt. Curly said huskily forehead to forehead, “You could have told me.”

“You’re going to have to help me out with that… You still haven’t told me what you heard,” Athena whispered, still breathless from the passion in his kiss.

“That I was your first kiss, first courtship…” to emphasize what he said, he kissed her again.

“And how or when was I supposed to tell you?” Athena’s cheeks tinged pink.

“You could have told me at any time, in whatever way you wished,” Cullen said softly. Taking her hand and leading Athena up the stairs to the couch, so they could sit and talk.

“I thought it was implied the first time we made love…” Athena looked at her hands and the pink tinge brightened to red.

The corner of Cullen’s mouth quirked into a half smile, “Not making love before, doesn’t mean that you’ve never been kissed or courted.” He placed a gentle hand on her cheek, caressing it, and whispered, “Thank you.”

“For what?” Athena asked, confused.

“For being the woman I love,” He kissed her and started to undress her… And they made love.

**

Cullen stroked Athena’s shoulder as they laid in bed. He loved the weight of her head Resting over his heart. The feel of her soft, even breathing caressing the fine hairs of his chest. Athena’s body seemed to snuggle perfectly at his side and he was content… happy. Cullen sighed, at peace. When Athena was in his arms the tortured thoughts hurt a little less. There was a knock at the door, interrupting Cullen’s thoughts and languid caressing. 

Athena wrapped a blanket around herself and went to answer it. Cullen asked, “Don’t you want to get dressed first?”

Athena shook her head and continued down the stairs to open the door. In came a five course dinner, one of the servants said, “The Ambassador thought you would like dinner for two.”

Athena sighed wearily and thanked them before they left.

Cullen got up and put on some pants, “What’s wrong, Athena?”

Athena sat down at the table in her blanket dress, “Five courses for two people… It seems like a waste of food and extra work for the kitchen staff.”

“It’s most likely the same dinner everyone is having, and the extra food will get eaten.” Cullen tried to reassure her, but he thought there was something more going on.

Athena sighed again, deciding to come clean, “It seems like we’re always getting interrupted, and I was half asleep when they knocked.”

“You’re tired?” Curly was surprised. He also wondered if he should be worried that Athena was getting ill.

Athena blushed, “No, I was just very comfortable and I didn’t want to move.”

Cullen chuckled, “And now you’re cranky.”

Athena chuckled as well, “Yes.”

“We’ll have to endeavor to fix that after dinner.”

Athena returned his smile and they started eating, “Has Dorian said anything else in your daily chess matches?

“The dragon was the big thing, and he some how thinks that when we’re separated I have an ability to make you eat or sleep. He’s also used the excuse that because you’re up at sunrise, he can’t concentrate.”

Athena shook her head, “Not true. When I get up he… Or Bull… maybe even both, are snoring so loud, that it wakes everyone else up, and then everyone is cranky and I go for a walk.”

“By yourself?” Curly was unable to hide his concern.

“No. Varric has apparently been appointed my bodyguard by someone I care very deeply for,” Athena took a sip from her cup to hide her impish grin.

Cullen blushed, “In my defense, when I first asked, he told me that he cared about you too.”

“When you first asked? How long ago was that?”

Curly’s blush got brighter, “Before Haven was destroyed."

Athena smiled and said softly, “Thank you.”

“For…? And who told you?” Cullen thought he could guess, but he wanted to be certain.

“For telling me, and take a guess.”

“Dorian,” Cullen rolled his eyes at her answering chuckle and changed the subject, “I would like to know what secrets my sister is telling you.”

Athena laughed, “Do you want to read it? I swear to you she said nothing bad about you, except that you need to write more.”

“The fact that she didn’t say anything bad about me is even more worrisome.” Cullen groaned.

“Most of it was stories from your childhood.” Athena smiled at him, “She did tell of one story when you were really little you had picked up a stuffed animal and tried to dance with it, quickly falling over the toys you had out.”

“And you wonder why I don’t dance,” Curly grumbled, blushing.

“You couldn’t have remembered that, Mia said you were barely three years old,” Athena smiled wickedly teased, “The next time we dance, I’ll have to make sure there aren’t any toys in the way.”

Cullen growled and got up from the table. Athena was too fast for him, even with her blanket dress, and ran away from him, laughing. Curly chased her and warned, “I will get you.”

“You have to catch me first," Athena was still running around the room. Her blanket started slipping. She stumbled a bit and Curly caught her, and kissed her. The blanket fell, he chuckled and smugly whispered, “Caught you.” He lifted her in his arms, and carried Athena to bed.

After making love, Cullen had one arm wrapped around Athena with his hand resting on her waist, and was entwining the fingers of his other hand through hers, which was resting on his chest. He whispered, not wanting to wake her if she was asleep, “Athena?”

“Mhmm…” She answered contentedly.

Curly chuckled softly, “Do you really like dancing?”

“I really like dancing with you,” Athena said softly. 

Cullen smiled and thought that he should ask Josephine to teach him how. He heard Athena whisper, “I love you.” And he felt her relax against him as Duchess fell asleep.

Cullen wanted to read the letter Mia had sent to Athena, but every time he tried to move, Athena would mumble something about not letting go and tightened the grip she had on his hand. After the fourth time of trying to get free, he gave up and fell asleep as well.


	20. Chapter 20

Athena was up with the dawn. She was wrapped in a blanket and out on the balcony to watch the sun rise. As soon as the sun broke the horizon, Cullen’s nightmares began. Athena went to him and started whispering in his ear. Cullen was able to calm down and woke a couple minutes later. Athena smiled at him and whispered, “Morning.”

Cullen smiled back, not trusting his voice as the dreams were still fresh in his mind. Athena was sitting on his side of the bed and bent down to kiss him, and then she whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he whispered back.

They got dressed without much talking, and sat on the couch in front of the warm fire that Cullen started before Athena gently broached the subject of his nightmares, “There was a mage at the circle that would have nightmares. Every morning my mother would meet with them and talk about the dreams. If they weren’t able to talk, the mage was supposed to write the dreams down. It took a while, but the mage said that it helped.”

“Athena…” Cullen trailed off. He was afraid of where this was going.

“It’s just an idea, Cullen. I just find it odd that the dreams don’t start until sunrise.”

“How would you know when they start?” Cullen was stunned. For him it felt as if he was being tormented the entire night.

Athena chuckled a little, “I’ve always been a light sleeper. I’ll wake a couple times during the night. When I wake, most times, you’re sleeping peacefully.”

“What wakes you?” Curly was curious about how light of a sleeper she was and he was desperately trying to change the subject to anything else.

“I don’t know, I just wake up. Most times I’m back asleep in a few minutes,” Athena realized what he was doing and didn’t fight him on it. She knew it was a hard subject for him. A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts and she chuckled, “Hungry?”

Curly chuckled, “I’m glad to see you’re in a better mood about it.”

“Oh, there will still be entirely too much food,” Athena said as she went to answer the door, and Cullen heard, “Dorian?”

“Good morning, Athena!” Sparkler said brightly.

“You’re not breakfast,” Curly quipped as they came up the stairs. He quickly threw on a white shirt.

“Ha ha, Commander,” Dorian grumbled.

Athena laughed, “You’re never up this early. What happened?”

“Why does something have to happen for me to visit my cousin?” Dorian asked.

“Because you never visit just to visit anymore. Did you set your curtains on fire again?” Athena raised an eyebrow at her scamp of a cousin as she went to stand in front of Cullen. She was rewarded with Curly’s strong arms encircling her.

Dorian smiled at seeing the two of them so in love, “Yes, but that’s not why I’m here.”

Athena and Curly laughed and there was another knock at the door. Athena tilted her head back to look at Cullen, he briefly kissed her, and went to answer the door. 

Dorian said, “You two are adorable together.”

Athena blushed a little, and thanked him. The knock that Curly answered was breakfast. “We didn’t know that you had company. Will there be enough food?” One of the servants asked.

Athena looked at the several trays of food and chuckled, “There will be more than enough food. Thank you.”

The servants left and the three of them sat down to eat. Athena questioned, “When are you going to tell me who you are courting? And why haven’t you told me?”

“He’s worried that my telling people would hurt me. I’ve been promised to secrecy. Plus, I’m still planning on going home,” Sparkler dabbed at his mouth with a flourish.

“When are you planning on leaving?” Curly asked.

“I’ll likely go home with my Uncle, provided Corypheus is defeated first. I’m not going anywhere until that’s done,” Dorian responded, and then gasped as he suddenly remembered the reason he stopped by. Dorian pulled a letter out of his pocket, “A letter from my Uncle, for you.” Athena reached out a hand for the letter. Dorian smirked, “Not you… It’s for the Commander.” And handed Cullen the letter.

Athena looked at Cullen, incredulous, “And I got grief for writing Mia?"

“I had to ask him a question,” Cullen blushed. He half wished Dorian would fight him in the sparring ring.

Athena couldn’t contain her laughter, “I’m telling Mia.”

“You couldn’t wait until later?” Curly griped at Dorian.

“And miss this? Absolutely not,” Dorian chuckled.

"What did you write him about?" Athena asked. She knew it was foolish, but she hoped it was about making their relationship more permanent.

“I wanted to know if he had an idea as to when he would arrive,” Cullen hedged. What he said was true, but it wasn’t all he asked.

"Leliana could have found that out without you writing my father," she teased. Sparkler ate silently, enjoying the show.

“And then endure the questions from her and Josephine? I think not,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena laughed, “I can’t wait to tell them!”

“You had to do this, didn’t you?” Cullen growled at Dorian. For an answer he got a laugh and a nod.

“Athena, are you curious in reading this letter as well?” Dorian asked. If glares from former Templars could kill, there would have been a mess to clean up.

“No thanks. I’m going too have too much fun telling on him,” Athena laughed.

“I can’t get Mia’s letters out of your hands fast enough, and your not curious about your own father?” Cullen was stunned.

“With Mia it’s to learn about your childhood,” Athena grinned a little, “and I find you incredibly handsome when you’re flustered,” which caused Curly to blush. She briefly looked away and then looked down at their entwined hands, “I would rather have the answers to my questions in person. I also don’t want to risk reading something that may prevent me from being open to seeing him again.”

“Athena, my father is a very powerful man. If he hadn’t gone home, I may not have been able to get away.” Dorian said quietly.

“He warned you?” Athena sought any hope that her father hadn’t abandoned her and her mother.

“Someone did, and I’ve always had a feeling that he had a hand in the warning,” Dorian answered.

“But you don’t know for certain,” Athena fought back tears. She couldn’t help but wonder if Lydia would still be alive had the Knight-Commander been there when the circle fell.

“No, I don’t…” Dorian paused because Athena got up and walked away from the table, “But there’s also no way to know if he could have saved your mother. He may have died then as well,” Dorian looked to Cullen for an idea on how to proceed as Athena walked out on to the balcony. 

Cullen smiled sadly at Dorian and shook his head. Sparkler left quietly and Cullen went out to Athena. He saw that her shoulders were shaking, he turned her, ever so gently, to face him and drew her into his arms and held her. When her tears had slowed to almost nothing, Cullen said softly, “You once told me that you didn’t think about what would’ve happened had your past been different.”

Athena half smiled, “There are times where it would have been nice to know that I was actually living with my parents instead of being abandoned by them,” she sighed, a sigh that made her whole body shudder, “and I’m scared. I’m not used to having to answer to someone anymore, and I don’t want to. A powerful magister for an uncle and a knight-commander for a father… What happens if they don’t approve of us? I don’t want to hide our love.”

“Athena, you are the Inquisitor, no one has a say over you. Do you really think I would ever let you go?” Cullen tilted her head up so her violet eyes would meet his brown ones.

“We may not get a choice,” Athena finally gave voice to her fears. Even if they survived Corypheus, would her new found family interfere in the life she was finally building for herself?

“The only way we would ever not be together is if you didn’t want to be with me anymore,” Cullen said with absolute certainty.

"That will never happen,” Athena replied softly.

“Then you have nothing to worry about,” Cullen’s voice was just as soft, and he leaned in for a kiss.

**

Curly and Sparkler met in Cullen’s office for their almost daily chess match. When Dorian entered he asked, “No Athena?”

“She wanted to write to my sister,” Cullen finished setting up the pieces.

"That's a shame. I was looking forward to winning again today,” Dorian smirked.

“Not happening,” Curly’s reply was curt.

“How is she?”

“She’s worried that your father and uncle would disapprove of our relationship. Unless Athena wishes it, no one is taking her from me, and I would kill anyone that would try,” Cullen warned.

“My intention was not to give her more to fear, and Commander, I would be fighting by your side,” Dorian said.

“Even against your own father?” Cullen was surprised.

“My father tried to use blood magic on me because I desire men instead of women. Yes, even my own father,” Dorian answered with a tinge of anger lingering from the past.

"Maker’s breath! Dorian, I didn’t know,” Cullen thought for a moment, “How much of this does Athena know?”

“All of it. When we met my father, she refused to leave my side. She was right that I would have regretted not talking to him, but I think she had a spell lined up just waiting for my father to move wrong,” Dorian grimaced.

“No wonder she’s terrified,” Cullen muttered. He thought he had said it softly enough that Sparkler didn’t hear.

“Terrified?” But… Dorian did.

Cullen moved a chess piece and remained silent. Sparkler fingered the knight, “You’re not going to tell me are you?”

Cullen shook his head, “Your move.”

“I understand why you’re protective of her, but remember we all think she’s pretty amazing. And I’m pretty thrilled that I’m closely related to her.” Dorian made his move.

“You can ask her then, can’t you?” Cullen moved his knight to square off with one of Dorian’s pieces.

“I never get to see her anymore… She’s always with you,” Sparkler complained.

Cullen chuckled, "You get to travel with her. I don’t, except on incredibly rare occasions.”

“That will change soon, Commander.” Dorian said quietly.

“I certainly hope so. And that is check mate, my friend,” Cullen chuckled.

“Maybe I should start writing your sister,” Dorian quipped. 

The door to Cullen’s office opened and shut, letting in a whirlwind of Athena. She sighed with extreme frustration and murmured, “Why can’t they take no for an answer?”

“Who can’t take no for an answer?” Cullen looked over at his lover.

“Oh no… not here?!” Dorian stood, almost as if he was expecting Athena to confirm what he suspected.

“It’s nothing. Both of you can wipe the murderous expressions off of your faces,” Athena composed herself and smiled lightly at the men.

“I thought people asking to court you only happened on the road?” Dorian looked like he was itching to light someone or several someones on fire.

Athena looked over at Cullen and saw his expression grow dark, “And I’m going to tell you the same thing I tell you when we’re traveling. It’s nothing.”

“Your no should be respected,” Cullen and Sparkler said in unison.

“Once I tell them that I’m the Inquisitor they usually look for a place to hide.” Athena inwardly groaned. This was not how she wanted her day to go.

“Usually?” Cullen cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Who do I get to threaten with fire?” Dorian asked hopefully.

“No one,” was Athena’s stern reply.

“You never let me have any fun,” Dorian muttered.

“Who was it, Athena?” Cullen cracked his neck, his expression inscrutable.

“Some noble who didn’t know who I was,” Athena was starting to get irritated. The last thing she wanted was Cullen to be jealous.

“My dear, you could be a chamber maid and telling a person you do not desire their attention should be respected,” Dorian was quite cross with this unnamed noble, “I think I’ll see if our dear Ambassador knows who this noble is.” He bid them farewell, leaving the uneasy tension that seemed to swallow Curly’s office.

“He’s right,” Cullen finally stood, gently replacing the chess piece he had squeezed in his fist.

“There’s no reason for you to be upset, everything I have to give is yours,” Athena wrapped her arms around her lover’s waist.

“You’re a beautiful woman, I am not upset that someone complimented you, if that is all they did. I am beyond bothered by the fact that when you told them no, they persisted," Cullen gazed into her lovely violet eyes.

“I didn’t get upset at the Winter Palace. Was your no respected there?” Athena was interrupted.

“They didn’t know that we’re a couple, and yes, it was,” He emphasized… She really wasn’t helping.

“Or the many ladies here that devour you with their gaze, while I’m holding hands with you,” Athena finished. 

Cullen was shocked by her remark. He truly only had eyes for Athena, "What are you talking about? And if the women here do look they do not make their desires known to me. I want to know the whole story.”

“I came down from my chambers, and as usual I had to navigate my way around nobles and the crush of the main hall. When I was almost at the door, I was cornered by a guy dressed like a peacock,” Athena started.

“A peacock?”

“His clothing was incredibly colorful, and he had peacock feathers sewn into his cape.” Athena explained. Cullen shook his head and motioned for her to continue, “He said I was very attractive and asked if I’d be willing to marry him.”

“What?!” Burst out of Curly.

“I told him, no, that I was already in a relationship, and he should probably look elsewhere for matrimony because I’m the Inquisitor,” Athena continued, not acknowledging Cullen’s outburst. “He then got closer to me and told me he didn’t mind a short marriage. Bull then pulled him off of his feet and I came here.” Athena looked at the chess board.

"Interested in playing a game?” Cullen asked when he saw where Athena’s gaze landed. He promised himself he would speak to this peacocked noble later. He would prefer to meet the noble in the sparring ring, but fops like that were worth a half hearted punch before they plead mercy.

“Beating my cousin wasn’t enough for you?” Athena smiled. She thought Cullen would be more upset, she was relieved he wasn’t.

“I want another chance at teaching you how to play,” Cullen replied as they released each other and sat on opposite sides of the chess board.

"Trying to prove Mia wrong?” Athena teased.

“Ha ha,” Cullen grumbled. 

Athena stood, bent over the table, and kissed him… Knocking most of the chess pieces down. Athena blushed and Cullen chuckled, “What am I going to do with you?”

“Love me?” She whispered.

“Forever,” Cullen stood, forgetting about the chess game and kissed her. And they went upstairs to make sweet, passionate love.

After their passion was spent, they laid holding each other and Cullen asked, “You were able to get everything you wanted to do done?”

Athena chuckled at his awkward way of asking about writing his sister, “Yes, I did.”

“What did you tell her?” Cullen felt he had the right to be nosey since his love was writing his sister.

“Tell who?” Athena teased.

He rolled on top of her and growled playfully, “Very funny, Athena.”

“I’m glad you think so,” she shifted seductively beneath him. 

He shook his head at her and kissed her… Only to be interrupted by a knock on the door. Cullen’s head dropped on her shoulder and he growled, irritated.

Athena smiled sympathetically at Cullen as he moved off of her to get dressed. She followed him, wondering what emergency needed her attention this time.

Cullen made his way to the office door, grumbling about interruptions and having no decency. Athena tried desperately not to laugh. When he opened the door a messenger saluted and handed him a piece of paper. He saw that Sparkler was coming up the walk way to his office and he stalked back in, reading the missive.

Athena greeted her cousin by saying, “And here I thought the interruption was caused by you.”

Dorian mockingly put his nose in the air, “I’m not dignifying that with a response.”

“You just did,” Athena grinned at her cousin. She loved to tease him. (We all loved teasing Sparkler.)

Dorian chuckled, “Are you two staying here for dinner or will you be joining the rest of us for once? He is letting you eat, right?”

Cullen responded, folding up a letter that he had finished reading, “Yes, I let her eat. She’s also able to get a decent night’s rest.”

“If she’s still up at sunrise. No she isn’t,” Dorian quipped, smiling. 

As Athena’s blush faded from two of her favorite people discussing her like she wasn’t in the room, she saw the letter Cullen had folded up and stuck in his pocket. She was very curious as to who it was from and what it said because he had a grim set to his face. It took her a moment to realize Curly was speaking. Startled, she jumped, “Yes?”

“Where did you go?” Dorian also noticed Duchess’s start.

“Nowhere,” Athena tried not to blush. 

“Sure…” Dorian trailed off with what he thought was a knowing smile.

“Do you think of anything else?” Athena asked, exasperated, recognizing his smile.

“Certainly. I just lack my lover right now. And I enjoy teasing you.” Sparkler smiled brightly.

Curly looked at Dorian with an eyebrow raised. This was something he would question Sparkler about later. Cullen suggested, “Why don’t you go on ahead and I’ll meet up with you soon.”

“Cullen?” Athena was now worried about what was in the message.

“Something in the letter you were reading, Commander?” Sparkler asked. He was rewarded with a glare.

“Go, I’ll be right behind you,” Cullen said to Athena, quickly kissing her.

Dorian pulled Athena’s hand through the crook of his arm before the Commander could change his mind, “Come on, it’s been a very long time since we could talk without prying ears.”

Athena shrugged helplessly and left with Dorian. Cullen growled and made his way to the dungeon.

I saw Sparkler and Duchess come in and asked, “Curly has to work?”

“No, he said he’d be right behind us,” Athena sat down beside Ruffles.

“Have you two been enjoying your time alone?” Josephine asked.

“Yes, we have. You send entirely too much food though,” Athena smiled at her so her chastisement was gentle.

“I want to make sure everyone is well fed,” Josephine replied.

"Where is Leliana?" Athena questioned.

“She’s interrogating a prisoner,” Ruffles answered.

“Oh dear,” Dorian thought of the message Cullen received just before dinner, “This doesn’t have something to do with a certain feathered noble?”

“Please tell me Leliana didn’t throw him in the dungeon just because he wouldn’t take no for an answer?” Athena shut her eyes. I couldn’t tell if she was embarrassed or seething with anger. Maybe she was both.

“After you left another lady accused him of stealing something from her, and then several ladies claimed something on their person had gone missing after interacting with him,” Josephine explained.

“Duchess, anything missing from you?” I asked. I knew that she had turned Cullen’s coin into a necklace. It was our secret though.

“He didn’t touch me,” Athena said, but felt around her neck for the chain that held the coin her lover gave her. She sighed in relief.

“At least the fop had some sense to not steal from the Inquisitor,” Dorian muttered. He was still cross that Athena’s no hadn’t been respected. He and I saw it on the road many times, because of her petite height, being a woman, and a mage, but it takes an astoundingly crass person to do such in a person’s home.

I caught Athena’s brief, but worried glance at the door, and teased, “If we have to organize another search party for him, I’m going to tie you two together.”

“Don’t blame me for that. That was all Leliana,” Athena said.

“But you were worried,” I replied.

“Can you blame me?” Athena asked.

“Blame you for what?” Cullen, silent as a cat, sat beside Athena, who in turn, jumped.

“How is it with all that armor you’re able to walk so silently?” I asked.

Curly shrugged, “It’s loud in here?” 

“Not that loud,” I replied. I still can’t figure out how he can move so quietly in all that armor.

“Commander, next time you say that you’re right behind us, please be right behind us? Varric was ready to gather a search party to come looking for you,” Sparkler complained.

“They weren’t seriously…” Cullen looked at Athena. She chuckled and nodded her head. Cullen asked, “Why?”

“Because of the last time you pulled a disappearing act,” Ruffles chimed in.

“Where did you disappear to? Did it have anything to do with the missive delivered right before we came here?” Sparkler wanted confirmation of what he suspected.

“I went to see if Leliana needed assistance with her interrogation. But Bull was quite adamant about helping her,” Cullen hoped that would end the conversation.

“Was that what was in the letter?” Dorian sighed dramatically, “And here I was hoping it was informing you that everything was set for a romantic night out on the Inquisitor’s balcony.”

“That would be none of your business,” Cullen narrowed his eyes. He wondered what Dorian was up to.

Athena looked at Josephine and sighed. Ruffles looked back at her and replied to her unasked question, “This is mild compared to what they normally do when they’re in the same room. I had one soldier come and tell me that he was afraid he would have to break up a fight between them."

Athena looked at both of them and asked, "Chess?" Curly blushed and Dorian looked incredibly sheepish. Athena shook her head, “Looks like I have my answer…” she paused, “I’m starting to think Wicked Grace is a safer game.”

Curly paled and came very close to shouting, “No!”

Athena gave me a wicked smile and then looked at Cullen, “I will do my best to learn to play chess, if you promise that you will play Wicked Grace again?”

Cullen closed his eyes and murmured, "I'm going to regret this… Yes.”

Dorian and I laughed. The ladies practically jumped for joy. Leliana came in muttering, “He is lucky that I didn’t have my arrows,” and went in to Josephine’s office. Ruffles and Athena looked at each other and excused themselves.

“That’s a terrifying trio right there,” Dorian remarked, I nodded in agreement. Curly still had his eyes closed, already regretting his decision.

Athena and Ruffles entered the office quietly. Waiting for Leliana to calm down, to distract her from the night’s frustrations, Athena said to Ruffles, “I haven’t had a chance to tell you yet, but Cullen wrote to my father.”

Josephine’s eyes got wide and her mouth dropped open, “No!”

Leliana’s pacing slowed. Athena continued, “The man that barely writes to his sister, wrote to my father.”

“Did you read it?” Josephine asked.

Athena chuckled to hide her trepidation, "No… But I did write his sister to let her know.”

Leliana stopped pacing and slowly smiled, “Is this something we can tease him about?”

“He knows that I was going to tell you. So, yes, please do,” Athena responded.

Leliana chuckled, "Thank you for making this night worth it."

“Is there anything I need to know about who you were interrogating?” Athena hoped she didn’t need to be involved. She really disliked dealing with the pompous types.

“No, I think Bull and I can handle it.”

"Back to this letter... When did he get it?" Ruffles asked.

“This morning,” Athena replied.

“Has he read it?” Nightingale asked.

“Yes.”

“Oh, this is going to be fun,” Leliana chuckled.

“How is it that you do not know how to play chess?” Josephine asked Athena.

“When I wasn’t with the... my parents,” Ruffles and Nightingale smiled sympathetically at Athena, “it was safest for me to have my nose in a book, and I really loved reading. The only reason I know how to play Wicked Grace is because Varric insisted that he teach me.”

“Has the Commander tried to teach you?” Ruffles asked.

“He has, but I can’t keep the pieces and how they move straight.”

"Would you like my assistance in at least learning the pieces?” Josephine offered.

“Please? the last time we tried,” Athena chuckled at the memory, “we got distracted in more ways than one.”

“In more ways than one?” Nightingale raised an eyebrow.

“Well… It started off with me kissing him and knocking all the pieces over, and then we were interrupted,” Athena blushed a little.

Leliana laughed, “You definitely need Josie’s help, and thank you.”

There was a knock on the door, and Sparkler called out, “You can’t keep her in there all night! I believe the Commander has plans to steal her away from us. She’s also going to need to eat at some point.”

“Dorian!” They heard Cullen bellow.

The ladies were laughing as they exited Ruffles’ office. As they returned to their seats, Leliana sat on the other side of Ruffles. Nightingale said, “Commander, I don’t think I’ve ever heard you bellow before.”

“Sparkler has that effect on people,” I said in defense of Curly.

“Just because I bring people’s passions out does not mean I deserve to be yelled at,” Dorian huffed.

“It doesn’t seem like we’re needed, ladies,” Athena half stood, with laughter in her eyes before Curly grabbed hold of her hand, holding her in place.

“Josie, one of my agents found me earlier today and told me that the Inquisitor’s father had been contacted by an admirer of hers... Any ideas?”

Ruffles laughed, Cullen blushed and asked Athena, “You couldn’t have waited until tomorrow?”

“How else was I supposed to distract her from wanting to kill?” Athena smiled sweetly at him.

“She did it beautifully too, she was talking to Josephine, knowing that I was in no mood to talk, and I started thinking of what this may mean. It was incredibly effective to get me back to myself,” Leliana said. Athena blushed, and murmured her thanks.

“All I wanted to know was when we could expect him at Skyhold,” Cullen answered the unasked question.

“I could have asked him,” Dorian offered.

“Or I could have,” Ruffles added.

“No,” Curly said with absolute certainty. He knew all too well what would’ve happened had he asked either of them.

“Curly, you’re not going to live this one down,” I warned.

“I’m getting quite a list,” Cullen grumbled.

“All the more reason to love you,” Athena smiled at him, easing the teasing. 

Curly smiled back, “Have you had enough to eat?”

“Yes, I have,” Athena said.

“I told you he had plans,” Sparkler interjected, getting in a parting shot.

“Have a good night you two,” Ruffles said to our lovers’ retreating backs.

They walked together quietly until they reached the battlements. Cullen stopped, Athena didn’t notice and kept walking until she felt him pulling on her hand. She turned to look at him and he pulled her to him and kissed her. After the kiss ended, Cullen quietly spoke, “I am going to get incessant questions and letters from my sister now.”

“She wants to know that you’re happy and loved, it’s okay to share that,” Athena’s voice was soft.

Cullen smiled at her, “You’re amazing.”

Athena whispered, “So are you.”

They walked back to Cullen’s quarters hand in hand, stopping every so often to kiss. Once inside Cullen asked, “What would you like to do?”

“Dorian was pretty adamant that you had already planned something,” Athena braced her hip against his desk.

Curly chuckled, “I made the mistake of telling him how we were rudely interrupted by him earlier.”

Athena laughed, low and husky, “If it’s all right with you… I don’t mind picking up where we left off…”

Cullen had started to right the abandoned chess pieces. With Athena making it clear chess was the last thing on her mind, he stopped. Cullen took off his shirt while he walked over to her. Kissing her passionately, he lifted her up to the top of the desk where they made passionate love.


	21. Chapter 21

Athena awoke by herself at dawn to a hastily written note on Cullen’s pillow that read, “I will be back before breakfast. I hope you slept well. Cullen” 

She put the note back and said, “oh Cullen.” Duchess got dressed and went in search of her lover, wondering how bad his nightmares had gotten that he wasn’t in bed with her. Athena found him in the chapel saying the Maker’s Prayer and listened until he was done. Athena asked gently, “Who are you praying for?”

“For those we’ve lost…” Cullen paused, “and those I’m afraid to lose.” 

“Who are you afraid to lose?” 

“You,” he stood and walked over to her, “Corypheus used that warden’s body to create a new one for himself… What more is he capable of?” Cullen paused to wrap his arms around Athena, “You keep getting thrown in his path and when he comes back I have to throw you in his path again.” 

“Remember I have a lucky talisman. Given to me by someone I love,” Athena smiled gently. She wanted so desperately to ease his fear. She wanted to promise him that she would be back, but she loved him too much to lie to him. 

“That’s less comforting than I hoped it would be,” Cullen said quietly, “you will come back.”

“Cullen, I-“ Athena started.

“Allow me this, please? To believe anything else…” Cullen stopped to choke back tears and said weakly, “I can’t.”

Athena closed her eyes against threatening tears and whispered brokenly, “I love you.”

Cullen closed his eyes and held her tighter, not trusting his voice to even whisper. They left the chapel together, hand in hand. They walked silently to Cullen’s quarters so they could eat breakfast. Athena said quietly after they entered, “I want to get the note you left me from upstairs…”

“Why?” Cullen thought that was an odd request. She already had his coin from when he joined the Templars.

“Because I want to hold on to it,” Athena blushed.

Cullen chuckled softly and nodded his head. Athena went up and grabbed the note. When she came down a much smaller breakfast greeted her, “Josie actually listened?”

“It looks that way,” Cullen half smiled at her.

“Did you get any sleep at all last night?”

“A little. You?” Cullen pulled out a chair for her so Athena could sit and sat across from her.

“I sleep better when I’m with you,” Athena’s voice was so soft that he barely heard her.

Cullen smiled, “I know it may not seem like it… But you have the same effect on me.”

They ate quietly, and cleaned up the mess they made last night (poor desk), and walked hand in hand to the war room. When they got there, no one was in the mood for teasing. Leliana was frustrated because her agents could find nothing on Corypheus. It was almost as if he disappeared…

And then the ruins of the Temple of Sacred Ashes rose in to the sky, the breach reopened, and Athena’s mark glowed with an intensity that was only seen when she was closing rifts. Athena whispered to herself, “One last battle.”

Cullen, holding his storm of emotions deep inside, said, “The troops are still making their way back from the Arbor Wilds. I cannot send anyone with you.”

“I understand. This is how it began, it’s only right it should end this way. Thank you, for everything,” Athena said to all of them. Before she started to cry, she left.

Athena gathered her team and as we left she looked back over her shoulder. Cullen was standing on the battlements. As Athena broke her gaze with Cullen I assured her (myself), “We'll be back.” All Athena did was look to the road with grim determination.

Morrigan temporarily turned into a dragon to fight Corypheus’ dragon and she did a lot of damage to it before she got injured herself and turned back in to a human. Athena attacked Corypheus like a woman possessed. He, of course, started the fight and kept hurling insults. Athena was able to get the elven orb thing away from Corypheus and with that plus the anchor, she was able to seal the breach. Then she sent Corypheus to the fade with her mark, (my personal opinion is that she used a little magical oomph on the Darkspawn magister from the dawn of time, not that she would admit it.)

We, of course, cheered when we saw that she survived. I asked, “Well, Duchess, where would you like to go?”

Athena, exhausted and bruised, was leaning heavily on her staff. She smiled and asked, “You really have to ask?”

I chuckled, “To Skyhold, people.” 

Dorian came over to her and put one of Athena’s arms around his shoulders. She winced, Dorian said, “I think a healer first.”

Morrigan brought someone up from the gathering crowd, now that the sky didn’t have a gaping hole in it and the ruined Temple of Sacred Ashes was back where it belonged. Morrigan asked, “Can you heal her?”

“Your injuries are worse.” The healer said.

“I’m not the Inquisitor and I’ll be fine. Can you or can you not heal her?” Morrigan snapped.

Without a word the healer took away all of Athena’s bruises. I had to ask, “How is it that you came away from that fight with only bruises?”

Athena chuckled, “Just lucky, I guess. Dorian, you can let go now.”

“I guess I can,” Dorian let go and noticed her exhaustion, “You’re not going to fall asleep on us are you?”

“No, I want to get home,” Athena answered.

“Let’s move out!” I yelled.

**

We returned to Skyhold, where everyone was waiting for us… Well… waiting for Duchess. She walked through the crowd as they applauded to where Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen were standing on the stairs. Cullen hugged her. Reluctantly letting each other go they walked closer to the crowd and a roar went up. The crowd slowly dispersed, knowing that Thedas and the world would be around for more than a day. As the four of them walked in to the keep, Ruffles hopefully asked, “I can start planning a celebration now?”

The other three laughed and Athena said, “By all means.”

“Corypheus is…?” Leliana trailed off. She wanted to be certain the reports her spies had told her were correct.

“Locked in the Fade,” Athena answered.

“And the anchor?” Josephine asked.

“It’s still there… But not really noticeable anymore. Have you seen Solas?” Athena asked.

“He didn’t come back with you?” Cullen asked.

“No, he took the pieces of the orb and headed in the opposite direction.”

“I’ll have my scouts look for him,” Leliana offered.

“Thank you,” Athena willed herself to stand. The adrenaline of the battle and her determination to get home was fading quickly. Cullen put a supportive arm around her waist and they smiled at each other.

“We can talk more tomorrow. Goodnight,” Leliana said.

“Goodnight,” Cullen and Athena said before Curly opened the door to Athena’s quarters. Not a word was spoken until Athena was in bed, where she whispered as she drifted off to sleep, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen whispered laying beside her.

**

Athena slept through a bright and happy dawn. Along with most of the morning. When she woke she stretched, reaching out for Cullen who wasn’t there. With a sigh, she opened her eyes and saw that he was standing on the balcony. Athena sat up and wrapped the bed spread around her and walked out on to the balcony to join him. She noticed how high the sun was, “Morning, I hope?”

Cullen chuckled and turned to face her, “Barely. I didn’t think you ever slept past sunrise.”

Athena chuckled, "I usually don’t. I guess I was tired.”

Cullen hugged her. Teasing, he said, “I wonder why...”

Athena shook her head. A smile that wouldn’t end playing at her lips, “No idea."

“It couldn’t have anything to do with re-closing a hole in the sky and destroying a mad man?” He was only half joking. Cullen was still struggling with the thought that they had actually succeeded in saving the world.

“Don’t I try to do that every day?” Athena asked, enjoying how relaxed they were.

Curly kissed her suddenly, passionately, and whispered fiercely, “Not anymore.”

“Maybe we won’t get interrupted as much anymore,” Athena said hopefully. And then there was a knock on the door. They laughed helplessly. 

Cullen went to answer the door as Athena got dressed, putting on a lavender dress. Josephine was at the door, “Hello, Commander. Is Athena awake yet?”

“She is…” Cullen was, at turns, curious and wary at the mischievous glint in the Ambassador’s eyes.

“Hi Josie,” Athena said.

“Sleep well?” Ruffles asked.

“Yes, and more than I ever have in a single night,” Athena responded.

“Good! You will never believe what I heard at breakfast today! I heard…” Josephine trailed off and looked at Cullen uncertainly.

”Josie?” Athena wondered why her friend stopped talking.

“I’m not sure the Commander wants to hear this…” Ruffles blushed.

“Oh, now I really want to know,” Athena smiled wickedly at him. Cullen looked at Duchess quizzically. He never thought she was the type who wanted to hear gossip. Athena answered his look while brushing her thick hair, “You play chess with Dorian. Josie, Leliana, and I talk.”

“Maker’s breath! I’m leaving…” he truly did not want to know what the ladies talked about. A knock on the door interrupted his goodbye. It opened to reveal Leliana.

“Oh good, you are up,” Leliana said to Athena, “and the Commander’s here too.”

“No, I’m leaving.” Cullen walked over to Athena and kissed her.

“Not just yet, you’ll want to hear this as well,” Leliana smirked.

“I hear enough gossip from the soldiers. I don’t need to hear more,” Curly was trying so hard to retreat to more familiar territory.

“We don’t gossip,” Leliana huffed, pretending to be outraged. 

“Stay for whatever it is that Leliana wants to tell us and then you can go play chess,” Athena compromised, looking up at him.

Cullen shook his head, gazing tenderly at his love, “There are times where I wish I could say no to you.”

“You already have,” Athena teased.

“I have not!” (Aw, Curly, you shouldn’t have said that.)

“Yes, you have. The Winter Palace for one,” Athena quipped, smiling.

“That was an accident,” Curly grumbled as a becoming blush stole into his cheeks.

“It was still a no,” Athena chuckled at his sour expression, “What did you want to tell us Leliana?”

“I’m so glad you brought up the Winter Palace, and it’s not really telling you…” Leliana disappeared down the stairs and brought up two paintings. She turned them around. One was of Curly and Duchess dancing on the balcony of the Winter Palace, the other showed Cullen kissing one of his Halamshiral admirers.

“I love the first one… The second one I’m not so sure about,” Athena quickly glanced at Cullen. He was staring at the first one. She wasn’t sure if he had seen the second painting, “Where did you find them?” 

“One of my agents found them in Val Royeaux. They said there was one of the Inquisitor kissing Varric, but he wasn’t sure how well that would go over…” Leliana smirked.

He kissed Athena and said, “I’m leaving now.”

Ruffles was too excited to wait until Curly was out of ear shot to tell her news, “It’s so amazing that you found paintings! Apparently, there is a painting of us playing Wicked Grace.”

“Really?” Athena asked, “What part of the game?”

Ruffles chuckled, “The end.”

They heard from Curly, as he was just about to leave, “Maker’s breath!” And then the door shut, hard.

The ladies’ laughter followed Cullen down the stairs. Dorian spotted Curly and got up to walk with him, “For someone who just saved the world… You’re very tense.”

“It appears that Leliana, Josephine, and Athena get together on a daily occurrence to “talk”,” Cullen said, not stopping.

“Oh?” Sparkler was hoping for juicy bits to distract Cullen during chess.

“I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough,” Cullen said and then slowly smiled, remembering Athena’s care free laugh, “However, seeing and hearing Athena laugh, somehow makes my embarrassment worth it.”

“You really love her don’t you?” Sparkler asked quietly as they sat down at Curly’s chess table. He couldn’t say that he wasn’t disappointed he wouldn’t be able to distract Cullen.

“I do…I never felt or thought I’d be able to care for anyone again, much less love someone,” Cullen paused, “but with her it’s so different.”

“Different?” Dorian asked as he made a move.

“We were saving the world from being destroyed, and, at times, all I could think about was how happy she made me. She could have hated me, and I would have understood.” Cullen made his move.

“This was what she was talking about…” Dorian rubbed his chin, trying to figure out his next move.

“What do you mean?” Cullen toyed with a rook.

“She would talk to Varric quite a lot about you. Most of the time at his insistence. One night, right before you became a couple she was very frustrated as to why you refused to see the good in yourself. It was only that one night, and I was left to wonder if she was doubting herself,” Dorian finished and moved his knight.

Cullen looked at Sparkler’s move and shook his head. At times, Dorian was a worse chess player than Athena, “I’m surprised you didn’t ask her.”

"Varric handled it superbly. He told her that she just needed to give you time, and that she knew how Templars were. Which sent her in to a panic because outside of my Uncle and… Well… You, she didn’t exist to them. His response was, you know he’s a good man, and you know we all see it, and that you would come around to seeing it eventually too. He was able to calm her with that. At times she can be very impatient,” While Dorian talked, Cullen made his move and won.

Cullen chuckled, “I have yet to see her be anything but patient. And why would you move your knight there?”

Dorian looked at the board and swore, “How dare you use my cousin against me?”

“You asked,” Cullen smirked. 

There was a knock on the one side door as Athena came through the door that lead to the main part of the keep. She looked at each of them, looked at the chess board, figured out who won, and started to back out, “I’ll come back later.”

Cullen got up to answer the door. Dorian said to Athena, “Next time, you’re laying on his desk again.”

Athena closed her eyes and sighed, “I knew there was something I forgot to do."

“Lay on his desk?” Dorian hopefully asked. If so, he couldn’t believe his luck.

“No,” Athena chuckled, “I got a letter from Mia, and I wanted to get it before I left my room.”

“Of all the things to think of when I say desk,” Dorian sighed dejectedly and shook his head, “you know there’s so many more things you can do with a desk than read…”

At that point they heard Curly swear, “I’m going to kill them!”

“Cullen?” Athena walked over to him. Haven’t they killed enough people, darkspawn magisters, demons, and so on?

Cullen pulled the offending art work in and set it against the wall so no one could see it, and asked, “Leliana or Josephine?”

What are you talking about?” Athena was thoroughly confused.

“The painting,” Cullen motioned toward it with his hand.

“I kept the one of us dancing. Leliana said she would destroy the other one.” Athena said.

“If it was to be destroyed, why is it here?”

“I don’t know. After you left we talked about the celebration Josie is planning and they left. Then the letters came… Which I forgot.” Athena was concerned. He didn’t acknowledge the second painting at all, and now he’s upset about it?

"Since when do you forget things? And what’s wrong with the painting?” Sparkler asked.

“I got too much sleep last night,” Athena ignored the second question.

"Not if you didn't sleep past sunrise. Don’t make me look at the painting,” Dorian warned.

“I did, the sun was very high in the sky when I woke up. And the painting is up to Cullen,” Athena paused, “Did you look at the painting? Leliana’s not the type to lie, even when she’s teasing.”

"You have a point,” Cullen turned the painting over and it was one of him and Athena kissing. He looked at Athena.

She shrugged, “News to me.”

“There’s more than one of these?” Sparkler asked.

“Apparently there are several different paintings,” Athena smiled at the painting. She thought it was cute.

“Too many,” Cullen grumbled. Athena chuckled at him.

“I think I’m going to go look in to these paintings,” Dorian said and left.

“What do you think he’s going to find?” Curly asked.

“Probably all of them,” Athena answered. Cullen groaned. With a smile she said. “I saw that you won. Want to try teaching me again?”

“I had other things in mind…” Cullen kissed her hard and passionately… And the papers were shoved off of the desk again (I’m starting to think the desk deserves its own book. Written by me, of course.) 

Once they were dressed, Curly tried to teach Athena to play chess. She was able to get the names down… Not how the pieces moved, but one step at a time. Cullen asked, “How big is the celebration Josephine is planning?”

Athena chuckled, “I don’t know. She did try to tell me about it, but I told her I knew nothing about planning these things and that I trusted her. She got this huge smile and thanked me.”

“When is it?”

“Next week.”

“That was fast,” Cullen took hold of her hand. He loved touching Athena.

“I think she’s had a list of things she wanted for the party for a while now,” Athena smiled at him, “would you like to go for a walk?”

“Restless?” Cullen returned her smile.

“Yes,” Athena laughed at herself.  
“You can relax a little now.” Cullen advised.

“Too much sleep, and it’s weird not having to worry about when or what the next disaster will be,” Athena stood.

“Hopefully, it’s something that takes little time in getting used to,” Cullen stood and they walked to her tower where he grumbled, “I don’t understand why it’s taking so long to complete this.”

“I told you that they think it’s haunted,” Athena released Curly’s hand to climb the ladder.

“The only thing haunting this thing is you,” he grumbled again, following her. He heard her laugh at him.

Cullen was almost at the top when he heard Athena say, “Cole? What are you doing here?”

“Hello. I come here to think sometimes,” Cole said and then he saw Curly, “Commander."

Cullen nodded in greeting. Athena asked Cole, “How long have you been coming here?”

“Since we got here,” Cole answered, “Commander, I am sorry for upsetting you.”

“Thank you, Cole,” Curly responded.

Sensing how restless Athena was, Cole said, “Nerves frayed with tension even though success was great. Why?”

“He’s afraid this tower is going to fall apart,” Athena answered.

“Not the Commander… You,” Cole said.

“I don’t know. Sometimes, people have emotions that they can’t explain or have a reason for… I guess it just doesn’t seem real yet,” Athena shrugged helplessly.

“You did succeed, Corypheus is gone from this world. There isn’t as much pain anymore,” Cole was unsure about how to help.

“Thank you, Cole. If we’re disturbing you, we can go somewhere else,” Athena offered.

“No, I like your company,” Cole smiled.

Athena looked at one of the barrels to see turnips on it, “Why are there turnips on the barrels?”

“They wanted to feel the air here,” Cole answered.

“How long do you leave them here?” Curly asked catching on, he hoped, to what Athena was thinking.

“A couple days,” Cole responded.

“And then you roast them?” Athena asked looking at Cullen.

“Yes. Should I stop?” Cole asked.

Athena chuckled, “No, you’re not hurting anyone. The workers think the tower is haunted, and they’re afraid to come here.”

“Why?” Cole asked.

“Some people get scared by things they can’t see, remember, or understand. Having turnips show up on a barrel when they weren’t there the day before and if there isn’t an answer to be found, it can scare people.” Athena explained.

“I guess I shouldn’t be drawing on the stones then…” Cole trailed off. Athena laughed and Cullen chuckled, “I didn’t know he could do that!”

“Who’s he?” Athena asked.

“The Commander, I didn’t know he could laugh. He’s so light when he laughs… The pain goes away,” Cole was very excited by this new discovery.

Athena laughed while Curly blushed a little. Athena said, “Sometimes all that is needed is a good laugh.”

“Another way to help people!” Cole looked at Cullen, “I knew he could do what Varric calls blushing… You get him to do that a lot.”

Athena’s turn to blush, and change the subject, “Cole, you don’t have to stop writing on the stones or bringing the turnips up here. You aren’t hurting anyone, and it gives them something to talk about while working.”

Curly gave her a knowing look. She blushed more. Cole, who was watching, wondered, “How are you getting her to blush without saying anything?”

“Talent,” Athena groused.

“Can you put thoughts in other people’s minds?” Cole asked.

“No, I can’t,” Curly smiled at him.

“What is this talent?” Cole asked.

“You help people, that’s one of your talents. One of the Inquisitor’s talents is saving Thedas,” Cullen smiled as Athena’s blush grew, “One of my talents is getting the Inquisitor to blush.”

“You don’t call her that… I don’t call her that. She told me that I didn’t have to,” Cole was getting even more confused.

Cullen chuckled, “You’re right, I don’t.”

“And I don’t require anyone to call me it,” Athena said.

“But… Why?”

“Because it’s how I refer to her when I’m around people I don’t know well,” Cullen patiently explained.

“You’re protecting her by using her title,” Understanding dawned on Cole.

“I try to,” Cullen said. Athena blushed, again.

Cole looked like he wanted to ask another question. He thought better of it and said, “I think I’m hungry…”

“Then you should eat,” Athena said.

“Yes… I need to talk to Varric,” Cole left.

“Looks like we found our ghost,” Athena smiled.

“That was the longest conversation I’ve ever had with Cole,” Cullen walked to the edge of the tower and looked out at the mountains.

“Everything is brand new to him,” Athena joined him.

“Feeling less restless now?” Cullen asked.

“Yes, I am.”

“Good. I really enjoyed getting you to blush more,” Cullen pulled her close to him and kissed her before she could respond.

After the kiss she mildly complained, “That’s not fair.” 

Curly raised an eyebrow at her which caused Duchess to blush, and he chuckled, “What would you like to do now?”

“Go get Mia’s letters.”

“Letters?” Cullen was perplexed by this news.

“I guess she trusts me to get your letter to you…and there was one addressed to both of us,” Athena shrugged.

“There’s one addressed to both of us?”

“I don’t know,” Athena laughed at him, “she’s your sister.” 

“Don’t remind me…” Cullen said as they went to Athena’s quarters, “How is it that you’re not interested in reading my mail anymore?”

“I was only ever interested in reading your sister’s letters, and now if I have a question, I just write to her,” Athena grinned.

“What do you write about?” 

“You, mostly,” Athena chuckled at his blush, “but she has asked about my past, what my hopes and dreams are…”

“And what are those hopes and dreams?” Cullen asked quietly as he opened the door for them to enter Athena’s chambers. They had been bent on survival for so long, that he hadn’t dared to hope or ask what Duchess’s hopes and dreams were before now.

Athena stopped and looked at him, “You really don’t know?”

“With the war, and the breach…” Cullen trailed off. He was uncomfortable with the thought that he should have asked before now.

Athena smiled at him, understanding, and didn’t say a word until they were seated on her couch in front of the fire place (cruel to keep a man waiting that long, Duchess.) She looked at him, entwined her hands with Cullen’s and said with absolute certainty, “I want Skyhold to be seen as a sanctuary for all kind and caring creatures. More importantly, I want to spend the rest of my days with you. I want our children and grandchildren running through these halls. I love you.”

Cullen kissed her with a passion so great that he felt like he was going to explode. Athena returned that passion, clothing got ripped, and as they made wild, passionate love… It was a miracle the couch didn’t break (must be the same dwarven make as Curly’s desk.)

As they laid together after their attempt at breaking the couch, Athena asked quietly, “I never asked what your hopes and dreams for the future are…”

Cullen remained quiet, so quiet that Athena thought he fell asleep, she shifted to look at him, and felt Curly’s grip tighten on her, “I thought that you had fallen asleep…”

“No, I’m just enjoying holding you,” Curly said softly, “I would like to help Templars that lose their minds to lyrium.”

“And us?” Athena smiled at what Cullen said. 

Cullen had closed his eyes, immensely enjoying the feel of her in his arms, knowing that they didn’t have to rush off anywhere, or watch her leave to face of Maker knows what, “Hmmmm?”

“Cullen!” Athena lightly hit him on the chest.

Cullen chuckled softly, “I want the same things you do, Athena.”

“Is this where you propose or do I?”

Cullen’s brown eyes flew open and he sat up, dislodging a very comfortable Athena, “What? I- We just…” He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, “Let’s enjoy not being at war for a bit, please?”

“You want to avoid work?” Duchess was shocked.

“Yes,” Cullen sincerely hoped she would drop it. He had plans for this, and he was afraid he would let something slip.

Athena chuckled, “Okay, I surrender,” She got up and walked to her desk. Athena showed Cullen the letters, “Which one would you like to read first?”

"The one addressed to both of us?” 

Athena smiled and brought all three back to the bed. She gave Curly his letter and the one addressed to both of them, it read: 

Dear Athena and Cullen,  
I hope this letter finds both of you healthy and happy. There will be a new addition to our family by the end of the year (with hopefully more to come. Yes, Cullen, this means you. I have yet to meet Athena and I feel like I already know her, except for her past, but it sounds as though I will get the full story once we meet.) 

We had hoped to be able to travel to Skyhold once the war ended but with Rosalie being with child… I don’t think that’s going to happen. We anxiously await hearing from you two.  
Love,  
Mia

“You didn’t tell Mia about your past?” Curly raised an eyebrow at her.

“I don’t think my past and family history would go over well in a letter. Who’s Rosalie?”

“Rosalie is my youngest sister.” Cullen paused, “I’m going to be an uncle again.”

“You haven’t met your nephew yet have you?” Athena asked, realizing what the end of the war meant.

“Not yet,” Cullen smirked, “But I hope we will soon.”

Athena’s smile rivaled the sun as they read their individual letters.

**

The day of the party dawned bright and early, and back to her normal schedule, Athena was out on the balcony to greet the sun. As the sun rose, Athena tilted her head back, closing her eyes and letting the first rays caress her face. The wind gently played with her emerald green dress and tugged at her hair.

That was the vision Curly woke to. He smiled watching her, thinking he was the luckiest man in all of Thedas, if not the world. Cullen wished her a good morning as she turned to face him.

“Sleep well?” Athena smiled at him as she came in from the balcony.

“I did,” he got out of bed and met her half way, “the vision I saw upon waking was even better.” Athena blushed and Cullen kissed her, “and you?”

Before Athena could answer there was a knock on the door. She went to answer it as Curly shook his head, murmuring, “They could have at least waited until after breakfast.”

“Your Worship, we just received word that King Alistair will be arriving on the morrow,” one of Leliana’s agents said.

“Does the Ambassador know?” Athena asked.

“Not yet,” the agent shuffled on his feet.

“I’ll let her know at breakfast. Thank you,” Athena dismissed the agent and closed the door.

Cullen finished pulling on his shirt and chuckled, “It seems Leliana’s people need something to do.”

“I doubt that. Leliana was probably the first to find out and because of the celebration tonight, Leliana’s staying out of Josie’s way.”

"I thought they were friends..." Cullen trailed off, confused. Nightingale and Ruffles seemed thick as thieves to him.

“They are, but when Josie is setting up for a party, it’s best to stay out of her way.”

"And how do you know this?” Cullen took hold of her hand and they walked to the main hall.

“Back at Haven Leliana and I tried to help set up for a lunch she was having with some dignitaries, and we were more in the way than helping,” Athena chuckled at the memory.

“What happened?"

“Leliana and I were putting things in the wrong places. She really was trying her hardest not to yell at us. I think it was a blessing for all of us that I got pulled away that day. Since then, Leliana isn’t seen from until the event. Josie and I meet for breakfast, and I find other things to do until it’s time.”

They joined us for breakfast. Ruffles did as well… Sort of. Athena actually ate more than her and it wasn’t because of some polite custom. Athena noticed, “Josie, relax, everything will be perfect.”

“I hope so. I have a million things to do! The celebration is tonight, and there’s simply not enough time,” Ruffles rambled.

“Josie, once we’re done eating we will all get out of the main hall, so you can have run of the place,” Athena assured her.

“Thank you. I only have one meeting planned for tomorrow, so it will be an easier day.”

Athena closed her eyes and whispered sarcastically, “Thanks a lot Leliana.”

Cullen laughed and then coughed to cover the laugh hearing Duchess’s whisper which shocked all of us. 

Cole said, “He does that now. He’s getting quite good at it.”

“What’s so funny?” Josephine was half listening.

Athena opened her eyes and turned toward Ruffles. Her violet eyes begged her friend, “You have to promise me that you’re not going to panic.”

"Why would I panic?" Ruffles was confused and quickly becoming worried.

“I’m not telling you anything until you promise,” Athena insisted.

“I promise not to panic,” Josephine said with an aura of dread.

“One of Leliana’s people told me this morning that King Alistair is expected to arrive tomorrow,” Athena rushed through, wincing.

“And Leliana didn’t tell me when she found out?!” Josephine panicked.

“Josie, you promised,” Athena reminded her.

Ruffles took a deep breath and then another, on the third breath she said, “I’m calm. I just don’t understand why Leliana wouldn’t tell me herself, and why she would wait until the last minute.”

“Josie, do you remember Leliana and I trying to help you in Haven? I would rather fight a dragon than have your wrath directed at me… And if memory serves that’s exactly what I did,” Athena responded.

Curly raised an eyebrow at his lady love, “Another dragon?” 

“It wasn’t a high dragon, but yes it was a dragon that we fought,” I grumbled (the thing had come very close to lighting my chest hair on fire!) “and Ruffles, I agree with Athena.”

“I am not that bad!” Ruffles stood and started fixing the table setting. Realizing what she was doing she sat back down, blushed, and murmured, “Maybe I am.”

Athena chuckled, “We wouldn’t have you any other way. Everything will be wonderful tonight, and King Alistair doesn’t strike me as the type to desire parties just because he goes somewhere. Do you want me to stay and help?”

Josephine gasped, “Absolutely not! The party is in your honor, and my friend, you deserve a day where you don’t have to do anything.”

Athena smiled, “That was the past week. I am going to leave the main hall in your capable hands.”

When Athena stood we all stood and high tailed it out of the hall. Cullen and Athena walked to his office. Cullen repeated his question, “Another dragon?”

“We kind of just stumbled in to the village it was terrorizing. Remember this was back in Haven and we had just met. I felt kind of bad fighting it because it was just a baby.”

Cullen sighed, “I’m sorry. I guess I’m just nervous.”

“About?” Athena raised an eyebrow.

“Your father also said he was arriving tomorrow. With your battle with Corypheus, I forgot to tell you.”

“Why would that make you nervous?” 

“There’s something I want to ask him, and I’m not sure if he would approve of me,” Cullen hoped he could change the subject quickly before he gave his plans away.

"Why would his approval of you matter?” Athena found that thought utter nonsense.

They had reached the battlements when Cullen stopped. He turned to face her and took her hands, “He’s the father of the woman I love. It may seem foolish, but his approval is important to me. I was hoping to get his blessing on asking you to marry me.”

Athena kissed him for what seemed like an eternity, when the kiss finally ended, she whispered, breathless, “I don’t care about his approval of you or what his answer is to you. When you ask me, my answer will be yes.”

Now it was Curly’s turn to kiss her, “I still want to ask him.”

“I understand, but if he says no, please don’t let it stop you?” Athena pleaded.

“I promise you that it won’t,” Cullen kissed her.

As the kiss ended, she murmured, “I can’t wait to tell Mia.”

Cullen growled and backed her up against the wall outside of his office, “You’re lucky I have meetings all day.”

Athena kissed him and whispered, “I love you.”

Cullen whispered back, “I love you, too.”

"Commander?" One of the soldiers asked seeing them. Athena and Cullen both blushed and hastily said goodbye.

**

Athena walked to her tower and stood letting the wind play with her hair and dress. She was ecstatic that Cullen was going to propose sooner rather than later, but she was also incredibly nervous to see her father again. Why were the lies necessary? Why couldn’t she be told when she became an adult? Does he have all the answers to her questions?

“I understand why the Commander worries about you coming here,” Sparkler startled her.

Quickly recovering, Duchess teased, “He just worries about me because of the ghost that’s at this tower.”

“Are you saying this place is haunted?” Dorian looked a little nervous.

“Some think so,” Athena chuckled.

“And is the Commander one of them?” Dorian kept as close to the ladder as possible.

“I’ll just say we know who’s responsible for the haunting,” Athena chuckled even more as Dorian paled, “you never struck me as the type to be afraid of spirits.”

“Those I can see? Certainly not,” Dorian huffed, “Can we get down from here?”

“Scared?” Athena smiled.

“Terrified.” Dorian involuntarily shivered, causing Athena to laugh.

“The other person that haunts here is harmless,” Athena tried to comfort him.

“That’s not the reason. I felt the tower move,” Dorian shivered again.

“On windy days it does that,” Duchess followed Sparkler down.

“How often do you come here?” Dorian’s color returned now that they were both on a stable part of the tower.

“Anytime I want to be alone with my thoughts. Sometimes I drag Cullen up here.”

“Braver man than me,” Dorian mumbled. Athena laughed at him. “I’m glad my terror of wobbly towers amuses you,” Dorian groused. “Has the Commander told you that my uncle, your father is expected to arrive tomorrow?”

“He has,” Athena said quietly, looking out over the mountains.

“I take it you’re not excited?” 

Athena blushed in embarrassment. Her cousin was very adept at seeing through her, “I am. I’ve had too much time to think and worry about seeing him again. I have so many questions.”

“Anything I can answer?” Dorian wanted to alleviate the worry he saw in his cousin’s eyes.

“Thank you, but I think the answers should come from him,” Athena paused, “if he even has the answers.”

“What does that mean?”

“I still don’t understand why I was lied to.”

“That is certainly something only he can answer, because I’ve already told you what he told me,” Dorian walked with her up the stairs to the main hall.

Athena stopped dead, “I’m not going in there, you can if you want, but I have been pleasantly banned until this evening.”

“But it’s lunch time…” Dorian trailed off.

“Already?” Athena was surprised. She didn’t think she was at the tower that long.

“How long were you at that tower?”

“I left Cullen at his office shortly after breakfast… And went straight there,” Athena paused, “I guess I got lost in my thoughts.”

Dorian shook his head, “No wonder you never eat. Speaking of, where are we eating?”

“The tavern. Did Cullen send you after me?”

“No, my dear, I haven’t seen him all morning and he even cancelled our chess match today and tomorrow,” Dorian replied as they walked to the tavern. 

“Then how did you know I was up there?” 

“Because I looked out of a window and that tower can be seen from at any point in the courtyard. You’re not invisible Athena, you may have been treated as though you were at one time, but not anymore,” Dorian replied.

Athena had happy tears in her eyes, “Thank you.”

As they walked in to the tavern, applause went up from the crowd. Athena blushed and they made their way to me, “Hello, Duchess. Where’s Curly?”

Athena chuckled, “Working.”

“He even cancelled our chess match," Sparkler sniffed indignantly.

“No offense, Sparkler, but he generally doesn’t let Athena out of his sight for long when she’s home,” I returned.

“True,” Dorian chuckled, “She was so lost in thought that she forgot it was time to eat.”

“I ate more than Josie this morning, leave me and my eating habits alone,” Athena teased.

“I’ll leave you alone once you have eating habits where you don’t have to be reminded to eat,” Sparkler griped.

“Doesn’t everyone forget to eat at times?” Athena asked.

“Not daily,” I chuckled.

“I don’t think I’m going to be allowed to forget anytime soon…” Athena trailed off.

“And why would you think that?” Sparkler asked.

“Because I’m constantly being reminded by my friends and family,” she huffed. We laughed. And that was pretty much how the meal went with us teasing each other and laughing. After lunch Nightingale came in and took Athena away from us.

“Did you tell Josie about Alistair coming tomorrow?” Leliana asked.

“I did, and how dare you?!” 

“Normally she would be yelling at me acting like I planned this to happen. How did you get her to remain so calm?” Leliana asked as they walked in the garden.

"I'm guessing she wasn't too happy when my aunt and uncle and Alistair were here,” Athena chuckled.

"No, she wasn't. I’m friends with him, not his keeper,” Leliana complained.

“I told her that she had to promise me not to panic, and reminded her that Alistair seemed to like things low key,” Athena chuckled and stopped suddenly, “Does she know that my father is coming tomorrow too?”

“Oh, Maker, no. Why wasn’t I told?” Leliana groaned.

“All Dorian and Cullen, I was just told today myself,” Athena held her hands out in peace, “and I was told after I told Josie about Alistair.”

“And you can’t go in to the main hall until tonight,” Leliana sighed, “I should make Cullen tell her.”

“No, don’t do that to him. He has very noble reasons for wanting to meet my father,” Athena smiled.

“Oh?” 

Athena shook her head, “The only person I’m telling is Mia.” 

Leliana knew when she wouldn’t be able to get any more out of Duchess and changed the topic to someone not as fun, “We still can’t find a trace of Solas.”

“That’s so odd that he would just disappear like that,” Athena was dumbfounded by the missing elf.

“Do you want us to keep searching?”

“What do you think?” Athena sought her spymaster’s advice.

“I think we’re not going to find him unless he wants to be found.”

“Then no, I don’t want to risk anyone else. Has anyone figured out the painting in his chambers?” Athena always felt a little weirded out by it.

“No, we can turn our search to what’s there though. I will let Josie know that your father is coming tomorrow… After I talk to Dorian,” Leliana growled the last.

“Thank you,” Athena said.

“If not before, I’ll see you tonight,” and Leliana took her leave, leaving Athena in the garden. Athena walked around for a bit and saw a letter in the gazebo, it was addressed to her. The letter read: 

Dear Inquisitor,  
Kieran and I are leaving. Thank you for your generous spirit and your success. I wish you well in your future. Please apologize to your Commander for me, as you know I can be a little harsh, and I shouldn’t have been with him. The Eluvian is coming with us. Take care.  
Morrigan

Athena smiled, and sat enjoying the peace of the garden for a while. Since she was banned from the main hall she also could not get to her quarters or the library, and that’s where all her books were. She was hoping to sneak in and out of Curly’s office with a book in hand and not draw attention to herself.

Getting in was easy. The door she chose to use was already open. And she successfully got to the bookcase, smiling because she loved to hear Cullen talk. As she was choosing a book, the meeting was dismissed and she heard someone ask, “Commander, are you okay?”

When the soldier asked their question, Athena turned from the bookshelf to see Cullen looking pale. Cullen responded, “I’m fine, I just have a headache.”

As the soldier turned to leave he made eye contact with Athena, she nodded her head. The soldier responded with a nod and closed the door behind him. When she looked back at Cullen his head was down and he had both hands on his desk, using it for support. She walked silently over to him and gently placed a hand on his. He rasped, “Athena…”

“Shh, you need a break,” she whispered. Athena took that hand and ever so gently pulled it around both of her shoulders so he could lean on her. She led him to the couch and didn’t let Cullen go until he was sitting. She sat beside him and held his hand.

When he felt he could speak again, he whispered hoarsely, “Thank you.”

“Are your meetings done for the day?” Athena asked just as quietly. 

Cullen tried to nod his head, but that just made the pain worse, so he whispered, “Yes.”

"When was the last time you ate?" She asked softly. 

“Breakfast,” His voice sounded a little stronger.

Athena teased him, “If I’m not allowed to skip meals neither are you.” Cullen still had his eyes closed, but he smiled. Looking around the room she saw that lunch had been served but was untouched. Athena got up from the couch and looked to see if anything was still edible as lunch was several hours ago. Seeing that it was, she asked, “Do you think you’d be able to eat something?”

Cullen started to shake his head, winced, and whispered, “no.” 

“Have you had anything to drink since breakfast?” Athena sat beside him with his untouched drink.

"No," his voice cracked.

She put the flagon in the hand she wasn’t holding, “Then drink, slowly.”

Cullen did as he was told and the pain slowly started to leave him. He opened his eyes and looked at her. She whispered, “Hi.”

He caressed her cheek with a finger, "I wasn’t supposed to see you for another couple hours….”

“I got bored and came in to borrow a book. When did the pain start?”

“After the third meeting, which was around eleven.” Cullen said quietly. His head still ached a bit.

“It’s nearly five now, that’s a long time to be in pain…” Athena gently chastised him. Before Cullen could respond there was a knock on the door. Cullen moved to get up, and winced. Athena stood and shook her head at him, “I think I can manage to open the door.”

Athena opened the door to Leliana pacing, “What are you doing? Josie is in there going crazy!”

“What do you mean?” 

“The party starts in an hour and she thinks you need to get dressed,” Leliana was rarely exasperated, but this was one of those times.

Athena motioned at the dress, “I kept it clean, and how am I supposed get to my rooms?”

Leliana chuckled, “I’ll let her know,” noticing the worry in Athena’s eyes she asked, “is everything okay?”

“No… Yes…sort of,” Athena paused and glanced behind her, “we may be a little late though.”

“Anything I can do?”

“No…” Athena sighed as she heard Cullen shift, “I need to get back in there.”

“I will let Josie know that you will be fashionably late,” Leliana took her leave.

Going back to Cullen, Athena said, “It was for me anyway.” Cullen chuckled, softly and winced again. Sitting beside him she continued, “I’m glad to see you didn’t try to move.” 

“I thought it best to listen to you,” Cullen said softly.

“Thank you. You want to tell me why you didn’t take a break when the pain started?” Athena tried to not show her worry. But when you love someone it’s hard to be the stern healer.

“It did start off as just a head ache, and I wanted to get through the meetings to be free tomorrow,” Cullen said.

She shook her head, “You don’t get to tease me about not eating for a while.”

"Do you really think me stopping to eat would have made a difference?” Cullen sat forward with almost full color returned to him.

“It’s not that I think it, Cullen. I’ve seen what dehydration and starvation can do to people, and with you not taking lyrium anymore, it’s all that more important.” Athena explained, “and before you say anything about the Emerald Graves. I may not have taken the time to eat, but we would often stop to drink something.”

“You still don’t remember?” 

Athena shook her head and chuckled, “No, but I can’t see Varric letting me get away without eating something though. And in my defense I didn’t pass out, I fell asleep.”

“Walking… Down... The… Stairs,” Cullen spaced out the words for emphasis.

“It won’t happen again. Beware the wrath of Commander Cullen and Dorian Pauvus,” Athena smiled at him. 

Cullen chuckled and only slightly winced. The smile left Athena’s face and she looked away from him because tears were filling her violet eyes. Cullen noticed the change, “Athena?”

“You should have sent for me,” Athena said brokenly, not daring to look at him.

Cullen sighed, “Athena… Look at me,” he waited until her tear filled eyes met his, “I simply didn’t think of it. I’m used to us having the borrowed moments from the war, and what would you have me tell the person I would have sent to get you?”

“Anything, I don’t care what you would have told them. I’m going to be around a lot more now, and I want to be there for you,” Her tears spilled over.

He gently wiped a tear away, “If there’s a next time and you’re around, I will find a way to get word to you.”

“And you’ll stop for five minutes to eat or drink something?” Athena kept his hand pressed to her cheek with her free hand.

Cullen smiled at her, “Yes. Don’t you have a party you need to get ready for?”

“I’m not going anywhere without you."

“Then I fear you’ll be late,” Cullen kissed her.

“Aren’t guests of honor supposed to be late anyway?” Athena breathlessly asked after the kiss ended.

“True,” Cullen chuckled as he leaned back against the couch and put an arm around her.

She laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes, listening to the steady thrum of his heart. Duchess became so comfortable that she felt herself almost drifting to sleep. In an effort to fight that she asked, “Are you feeling better?”

“I am and it’s because of you.”

“No more pain?” Athena sat up to look at him. She looked all over his face for any lingering signs of discomfort. Finding none, she internally sighed in relief.

“No.”

“Good, because I need to brush my hair.”

“What makes you think I have a brush?” Cullen teased.

“It’s not exactly a secret that you style your hair,” Athena’s smile widened at seeing his blush.

“It must be nice for everyone else to have perfect hair,” He grumbled.

“I know several people that style their hair… I’ve tried and failed though.”

“Your hair is beautiful as it is. Who else?” Cullen got up to get his brush.

“Varric, he’s also teaching Cole how to. You had to know that Dorian does…” Athena followed him.

"No, I didn’t,” Cullen smiled brightly and handed Athena the brush, “thank you.”

“You’re going to use it against him aren’t you?” Athena brushed her hair.

“He tries to use you to distract me all the time. It’s only fair,” Cullen got out his formal wear.

Athena shook her head and gave the brush back, “As for my hair, you haven’t seen it full of… Things, and sweat. It would be really helpful if I could get it into a pony tail sometimes.”

“Things?” Curly chuckled as he got undressed.

“Yes, things,” Athena laughed until she noticed Cullen’s state of undress. A different light lit her violet eyes, and she whispered, “Josie would have my head.”

“Keep those thoughts until later,” Curly heard the whisper.

“Promise?” Athena breathed.

Half dressed he came over and kissed her with unsated passion, and whispered, “I promise.”

Athena bit her lip after the kiss and watched Curly finish getting dressed. She said thoughtfully, “Maybe I should bring my staff…”

“For what reason?” Cullen was surprised.

“To fight off all of your admirers,” She teased, smiling.

“Then I need full armor, sword, and shield,” Cullen teased back… Without blushing!

"Ha ha," Athena turned a very nice shade of pink.

“You look beautiful,” Cullen took her hand and guided it around his arm, “shall we go my lady?” Athena smiled at him and nodded.


	22. Chapter 22

As they entered, applause and cheers went up from all of us in attendance. Athena blushed a very becoming shade of red. Cullen smiled down at her, and whispered, “Definitely should have worn the armor.”

Athena’s blush deepened. Sparkler was the only one brave or stupid enough to try and pull Athena away from Curly, “Would I be able to borrow my cousin, Commander?”

“You would have to ask her as it’s her night,” Cullen answered.

Athena looked at Cullen and smiled, “Yes, Dorian, you can borrow me. I have a feeling I’m going to be getting “borrowed” a lot tonight.”

Curly released her to the care of Sparkler and he was called on by one of his captains. Cullen went over to talk to him, positioning himself so he could watch Athena. “Commander, Daniel said you had a head ache earlier… I trust you’re feeling better?”

“I am, thank you,” Cullen responded, “Enjoying the victory?”

“Very much. It’s good to have a moment to breathe.” Captain Rylen said. Athena’s laughter rang through the hall and Cullen smiled. The captain noticed, “You sure are sweet on her.”

Cullen chuckled, “She’s an amazing lady.”

“Some of the new recruits were wondering if she was available…” The captain chuckled.

“Were they now?” Cullen took a sip of his drink to hide his smile.

“I hope you don’t mind that I dissuaded them of the notion?” Captain Rylen asked.

Cullen chuckled, “Not at all Rylen.”

Athena was talking quietly with Dorian until I approached, “You have Curly watching your every move, your cousin has kept you to himself since you walked in the door. When do the rest of us get a chance?”

Athena laughed, “I will be around, I promise.”

“My dear, I think he was chastising me,” Sparkler said.

Athena saw Ruffles and said, “Excuse me, there’s someone I have to thank.”

Josephine was checking that the tables were to her specifications. Athena walked over to her, “Everything is perfect, Josie, thank you so much.”

“You’re enjoying it?” 

“I am,” Athena smiled at her.

“Have you eaten yet? I sent for the cakes from Val Royeaux. I probably shouldn’t have changed the caterer at the last minute…” Josephine was nervously rambling.

“Josie, she said it was perfect,” Leliana chimed in from behind Athena. “How is the Commander?”

“He’s fine now,” Athena knew better than to ask how Nightingale knew that something had been wrong with Cullen.

“The Commander was ill?” Ruffles asked, concerned.

“Just a headache,” Athena looked in Cullen’s direction and smiled. He saw her, raised his glass to her in a salute, and smiled back. Duchess turned back to Leliana and Josephine and asked, “When do we get to go shoe shopping?” 

Leliana laughed, “Whenever you would like. With Cassandra becoming the new Divine, I’m free to remain here.”

“When she leaves us, I want to send her weekly romance chapters. It’d be even better if they came from Varric,” Athena said so only Leliana and Josephine could hear.

Leliana laughed, "I will make certain that happens, my friend.”

“I think Varric would be more than happy to help us,” Athena responded conspiratorially.

"You two are horrible!” Ruffles exclaimed, “but I love it!”

Athena eventually finished making her rounds to everyone and looked for Curly, who appeared by her side as if by magic. Which startled Athena, “Who is teaching you to do that?”

Cullen chuckled, “I had three siblings I had to maneuver around. I wasn’t allowed to step on them or wake them.”

Athena shook her head at him and leaned against the door to her quarters, “There was a certain Commander that promised me something earlier…”

“Oh? Maybe I should have words with him…” Cullen cornered her against the door.

Athena laughed and opened the door. The happy couple ascended the stairs to Athena’s quarters. Once reaching the middle of the room they stopped and gazed into each other's eyes. Athena asked, “What does the Inquisition do now?”

“I think we may actually have a moment to breathe.”

“That would be nice,” Athena sighed. Holding hands they walked out on to the balcony to stand in the moonlight. Athena put her back against the railing and looked up at Cullen, “Thank you. Without you I fear I would have given up long ago.”

“It is my pleasure to serve at your side. For the rest of the night, no more talk of the Inquisition. I have a promise to keep,” Cullen kissed her, lifted her up in his arms, and carried her to bed. 

They made love for most of the night and both of them slept until Josephine rushed in, “Alistair and your father arrived at the same time!”

Athena looked up at Cullen when she heard him groan and smiled ruefully, “Morning,” sitting up she smiled at Ruffles, “We’ll be right down.”

“Good because Dorian is pacing like a caged animal because his uncle refuses to talk about what’s going on at home, Alistair says the Hero of Fereldan is supposed to meet him here, and… can we go back to the party?” Josephine asked desperately.

Athena sat up in bed, “I’m sorry, Josie, their timing could have been better.” When Ruffles left, Athena quickly dressed in a sky blue dress. 

While Cullen dressed in something a little less formal than his formal wear, but still appropriate to meet a king with, he watched Athena nervously run her hands over the front of her dress, trying to smooth wrinkles that weren’t there, “Ready?” 

Athena took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “No.”

Cullen kissed her, “You’ll be fine.”

“Can’t we just stay here?”

“Josephine would be knocking on the door every five minutes,” Cullen paused and teased, “Alistair isn’t that bad.”

**

Sparkler noticed the couple first, “Uncle Arthur, may I introduce you to Commander Cullen and reintroduce you to your daughter, Inquisitor Athena Trevelyan.”

Arthur looked exactly like Dorian except with gray hair and a few wrinkles. He stood to greet Athena, “You look exactly as though your mother did when I first met her.”

Athena blushed and murmured, “Thank you.”

“I’m sure you have many questions for me. I will do my best to answer them.”

"Maybe we should move this to a more private location?” Cullen suggested.

Athena nodded her head in agreement and then noticed that Josephine and Leliana were signaling her, “I’m sorry, but it appears I’m needed.”

Curly noticed them as well and shook his head at them in an attempt to get them to wait. He saw that Alistair was with them and he whispered to Athena before she left, “My office.”

Athena smiled and went to meet with the trio. Cullen directed his attention to Athena’s newish found family, “We’ll wait for the Inquisitor in my office. Hopefully they won’t keep her too long.” Cullen said the last a little louder to make sure Nightingale and Ruffles heard him.

“It’s good to see you again, Alistair,” Athena greeted the king.

"And you as well, Inquisitor. I want to apologize for leaving so abruptly last time and to congratulate you on your victories,” Alistair offered her his hand to shake.

“Thank you, but you don’t have to apologize,” Athena shook his hand, which she found awkward. Shouldn’t she be curtsying or something?

“I hope you don’t mind my being here. Selene sent word that I was to meet her here,” Alistair’s excitement was contagious.

“I don’t mind at all,” Athena smiled at him. She liked Alistair, she really did, but for years she considered the knight-commander of her circle dead, and now he was here. Alive. And also her father. She really didn’t have the patience for royal niceties right now.

“If that is all for the moment, Your Majesty, the Inquisitor does have another essential meeting to get to,” Ruffles interjected to Duchess’ great relief. 

“No, I have nothing further. It’s endless isn’t it?” Alistair sympathized.

“It is. If you’ll excuse me?” Athena walked away and mouthed “thank you,” to Ruffles.

**

While Cullen, Dorian, and Arthur waited on Athena, Arthur wondered at Dorian, “I’m surprised you’re not asking after your parents.”

“I’m assuming they’re the same,” Dorian scoffed.

“As is much of the Imperium. I know you want change, Dorian, but it doesn’t happen over night.”

"I know that, Uncle. I will come home eventually. But first I would like to get to know my cousin without the world ending,” Dorian replied.

Cullen leaned against his desk with arms and ankles crossed and waited not so patiently for Athena to arrive. Who, by that, point was standing outside the door with her eyes shut and took a deep breath before entering. When she opened the door Cullen briefly nodded at her, “Inquisitor.”

She shakily smiled at him, “Commander.”

“As much as I would love to stay for this reunion, you have a lot of catching up to do.” Dorian looked pointedly at his uncle, “Your daughter is an exceptional woman, Uncle. She accepts people and sometimes spirits as they are, and if they want to change, she helps them. She shouldn’t have been lied to.” And with that, Sparkler took his leave.

“He’s right, you shouldn’t have been lied to,” Arthur said as she sat down across from him, “I will spend the rest of my days regretting that.”

Athena glanced at Cullen for support, he nodded his head and smiled at her. Looking back at Arthur she asked, “Why was I lied to?”

“Because we had this foolish notion that it would protect you. While Lydia was pregnant with you, if she would fall, a barrier would be cast around her, without her using magic and she wouldn’t be hurt. I had been offered Knight-Commander right before you were born, and right after you were born Lydia was offered the position of First Enchanter at the Ostwick Circle. With the rule of mages not being allowed to raise their children, we thought the safest option was to leave you with Evelyn. Evelyn would write to her daily of some magical thing you did as a baby. Unfortunately, Bernard saw all this too and wanted to find a way to keep your magic for himself.

“We tried to get the rule changed, when that failed, we tried to get you back by other means. Bernard essentially kidnapped you and was using mind control on Evelyn. And then you turned seven and a burst of energy flew out of your hand. Thankfully, Evelyn wasn’t under Bernard’s mind control at the time and got you to us as fast as she could…” Arthur paused to take a drink.

Cullen had come over to sit beside Athena and was holding her trembling hand underneath the table. Athena glanced at him, grateful.

"We hoped that if Bernard thought he could still claim you as his daughter, he would leave you and Evelyn alone.” Arthur sighed heavily, “We were wrong.”

“Once I was with you in the Circle, why didn’t you tell me?”

“Would you have been able to call him father, had you known?” Arthur asked. He desperately wanted to reach out to his daughter, but now was not the time.

“At seven? No, but when I was older…” Athena paused and looked away as tears filled her eyes. Cullen gently squeezed her hand as she continued, “I wasn’t given the chance.”

“One of many regrets was not trusting you with this sooner,” Arthur’s sadness was etched into the lines of his face.

“How did you know what Dorian’s father was planning for him?” Athena thought it best to change the subject.

“Dorian had long ago wrote to me that he simply had no desire for women. My brother wrote to me of his frustration with Dorian. I needed to protect Dorian, and at the time, Lydia was still alive… So we believed you would be safe,” Arthur answered.

“Why didn’t you come back?” Athena asked.

"There was an uprising in Tevinter that I had helped start, and our people were getting massacred. Along with needing to warn Dorian… By the time I was able to leave I had heard that your mother had died and you had left. If I had any idea that you or your mother would be unsafe, I would have never left.” Arthur had tears in his brown eyes.

"Safe… All alone, thinking my parents had abandoned me. Thinking that because of magic I had killed a pet dear to me. I watched my mother die without knowing she was my mother, and all because a blood mage wanted my power? How can that be considered safe?” Athena's tears spilled from her eyes.

Arthur choked back his tears, “Athena, I am so sorry for everything you went through. For what it’s worth, Lydia wanted to tell you… I was the one that convinced her not to.”

Athena looked down at her and Cullen’s entwined hands and closed her eyes. Cullen watched her tears silently fall, and said quietly, “I think everyone could use a break.”

“You are correct, Commander,” Arthur stood, “I’ll be able to find my way to the keep.”

Cullen briefly let go of Athena’s hand to close the door behind her father. When Cullen sat down again beside her, Athena opened her eyes and they were filled with heart ache and tears. Cullen gently pulled her to her feet, without saying a word to each other they went up the ladder and Cullen held Athena until she cried herself to sleep. Once he was certain she was asleep he wrote a note in case she woke up, and went to find Arthur.

“Commander?” Dorian was the first to see Curly enter the keep.

“Where is your Uncle?” 

“He wanted to see the library. Is Athena okay?” Dorian got up from the table to walk with him.

“She’s sleeping.”

“Rough morning?” Dorian winced. He did not envy the pain his cousin must be feeling.

“Very. I can’t help but wish she had had more time to celebrate her defeat of Corypheus before being thrown into another crisis.” Cullen was completely honest with Dorian.

“I’m sorry,” Dorian looked away. He felt strangely guilty, almost as if he had a role in the deception.

“There’s nothing for you to be sorry for. You didn’t leave her feeling abandoned or lie to her,” Cullen understood the guilt Sparkler was feeling, he almost wished he had carried her out of the Ostwick circle when they unofficially met all those years ago.

Dorian smiled sadly, “True, I know I don’t have to tell you what an exceptional woman she is. I just…”

“I know,” Cullen cut him off as he saw Arthur and motioned for him.

“I think I’m going to allow my cousin to beat me at Wicked Grace. If she’s awake and willing,” Sparkler winked at Cullen and waved to his Uncle.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you, Commander. How is she?” Arthur asked.

“She’s resting,” Cullen paused, now that he was standing there, he wasn’t sure where to begin. He decided to take the safest route first, “I’m sure Dorian has told you how much she means to me...”

Arthur smiled, "He has, in some letters it’s all he talks about.”

“In a way, I understand why you lied. But the Inquisitor has been through so much and she has helped me, the Inquisition, everyone that crosses her path. When she defeated Corypheus, I had hoped that she would get a break from heartache. I sincerely hope you are not here to absolve yourself of your sins and then leave her again.” Cullen met the older man’s eyes with resolve and steel in his voice.

Arthur half smiled. He was glad to see that Athena had surrounded herself with people that truly cared for her (Have you met her? Of course she did. And Bianca and I would be right there beside Curly to defend her, against anyone.) “My intention is for my daughter to have the opportunity to get to know what little family she has left. I hope to tell her stories of her mother, if she’ll allow it. You love her.”

Curly blushed slightly, “I would like to ask for your daughter’s hand in marriage.”

“I am honored that you thought to ask me. Many years ago, I went to Lydia’s father as you are doing with me, and he told me the story of his romance. Athena’s grandmother was an exceptional mage, she didn’t need to use lyrium, blood, or anything to make her magic powerful. They had met because she had healed his wounds from a bear attack. Her first words to him were “I’m going to marry you,” they fell madly in love and married less than a year later. 

“He also told me that with the Trevelyan women the fathers didn’t really have a say over their daughters as the title, estates, and such were passed down through the women due to an ancient treaty. Anyway, Lydia overheard me and her father talking, she didn’t give me a chance to ask, and ran in to my arms yelling yes,” Arthur and Curly chuckled. “You have my blessing provided she says yes. Which I have no doubt of. I see how she looks at you, and it’s very similar to how Lydia looked at me.”

“Thank you,” Cullen smiled at him, “I’ll have someone find you when she’s ready to talk again.”

Cullen went back to his office with a smile that wouldn't quit. As he approached the door he heard Athena laughing. Curly tried to pull an Athena, entering silently and not be noticed, it didn’t work. I saw him and shouted, “Curly!”

Sparkler looked up from his cards, raised an eyebrow at Curly’s smile and looked back at his cards. Curly walked over to kiss Athena and asked, “How is it that I can “sneak” in to the main hall, but I can’t sneak in to my own office?”

“It’s loud in the main hall,” I threw his words back at him.

“And either you or Dorian had Athena laughing so hard I could hear her through the door,” Cullen responded causing Athena’s cheeks to tinge pink.

“I was telling her that apparently Seeker has been swept off her feet by more than my books,” I grinned.

“Seeker?” Cullen sat down beside Athena.

"Cassandra,” Athena took hold of his hand.

“But she’s to be the next Divine…” Curly trailed off.

“As Sparkler and I were walking up here, we noticed someone at that crumbling tower that Athena likes so much…” I got interrupted.

“I’m not the only one, and it was never as bad as you three make it out to be,” Athena griped.

"The first time you dragged me up there the thing moved as I climbed the ladder,” Curly looked at her in mock sternness.

“It’s part of its charm,” Athena fought a smile and lost. I think she gets a perverse sense of enjoyment out of dragging unwitting people up there. 

“As much as I would love to debate the crumbling tower. I want to know who this soldier is,” Dorian returned us to the original topic.

“I was practically blinded by their armor glinting in the sunlight. Sparkler said…” I paused for Dorian to continue.

“I believe that is Cassandra and who is she with? As we watched in stunned silence, they started kissing,” Dorian finished.

“After they finished kissing, I looked to my right and saw Nightingale there watching the same thing… She smiled a smile so wicked that I know Seeker’s in trouble,” I said.

“The person with Cassandra had on the same armor as the person you were talking to last night, Commander,” Dorian raised an eyebrow at Curly.

“I was talking to Rylen last night, but the gossip in the barracks was…” Curly stopped, unwilling to give credence to rumor.

“Rylen was the one Cassandra was flirting with in the Western Approach!” Athena smirked at her lover, “And you chastise Leliana, Josie, and me for thinking we talked gossip.”

“When you spend all day with soldiers, it is impossible to not hear some of it,” Cullen blushed a little. Athena laughed at him.

“What ever the gossip was I doubt it involved Seeker,” I said.

Curly chuckled, “It certainly didn’t.”

There was an awkward silence and Athena sighed, “I guess I should go see if I’m needed.”

I looked at her, “You’re sounding like Curly, stop it.”

“Hey!” Curly jumped in.

I chuckled, “You’ve gotten a lot better.”

Athena blushed, “I’m sorry. I guess I’m still not used to…”

“Not rushing off to fight all kinds of weird shit?” I finished for her.

Athena laughed, “Yes.”

"You know if you're needed they'll find you,” Cullen quietly assured her.

“I know,” Athena looked away, she didn’t know how to put this feeling she was having into words.

“There’s something else isn’t there?” Cullen asked. Athena nodded still not looking at anyone, “Athena,” Cullen waited until she looked at him, “someone else?” She nodded again tears filling her eyes.

Dorian smiled, stood, and on his way out the door said, “I’ll go get him.”

“You three spend entirely too much time together,” I put the cards away.

Curly chuckled softly, “Athena’s father is visiting.”

“I think I’m going to go pester Seeker,” I unrepentantly grinned. (I teased her for hours.)

Athena smiled, “See you later, Varric.”

As I was leaving Sparkler came back with his Uncle. I think he was a little surprised to see a dwarf. Before the door shut I heard, “The Inquisition takes all kinds doesn’t it?” I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Varric is one of my dearest friends and one of how many appointed bodyguards?” Duchess smirked at Curly.

“He volunteered,” Cullen cheeks tinged pink.

“How long have the two of you been a couple?” Arthur sat across from them and beside Dorian.

Athena and Cullen looked at each other, baffled. Neither one remembered an exact date. Athena answered, “Close to a year…?”

“With at least a month of them mooning over each other. I am shocked that you two don’t remember,” Dorian shook his head in dismay.

“In our defense, we were trying to save the world,” Athena shot back.

“And you succeeded. How is it neither of you thought to write it down?” Dorian gasped dramatically, “I was there for your first date… I may have written it down.”

Athena laughed helplessly, “Is it really that important?” She looked at Curly, “we’re in love and we’re happy, shouldn’t that be all that matters?”

Dorian smiled at her, “One of many reasons you are exceptional. And yes, it’s important. What would you tell your children… That is if you want children?”

Athena chuckled and shook her head, “Oh, Dorian…”

“Still as curious as ever,” Arthur turned his attention to Cullen, “Commander, Dorian tells me you used to be a Templar...”

“I spent the majority of my life as a Templar, and then I was asked to join the Inquisition.”

“Why leave us though?”

“I felt as though I had done all I could with them,” Cullen shifted uncomfortably, “You haven’t?”

“No, I doubt I ever will. Where did you grow up?” 

“I grew up in Fereldan. My sisters and brother live in South Reach.” 

“No parents?”

“They died some years ago,” Cullen’s voice softened. It wasn’t the first time he wished his parents were still alive.

“I am sorry to hear that.”

Athena was uncomfortable with the interrogation of Curly, interrupted, “Dorian, have you taken my father on a tour of Skyhold yet?”

“I showed him the library,” Sparkler answered brightly.

Athena shook her head at him, “I guess it’s a start.”

Arthur chuckled, “I am sorry, my dear. I’m just curious about the man who won your heart. The tour can wait until the morrow as it’s getting late.”

“It’s okay. We should probably head down to dinner,” Athena said.

Dorian gasped in shock, “You’re reminding us about food? Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m fine. I just thought we had isolated ourselves enough for one day.”

“But you… Just yesterday, I had to drag you down off of that crumbling tower and remind you to eat. You are now suggesting that we go to dinner?” Sparkler blustered.

”The tower isn’t as bad as everyone makes it out to be…” Athena sighed. She loved that crumbling thing.

“The wind made it move,” Dorian grouched.

“And you did not drag me down. You were terrified.”

“It moved!” 

Arthur quietly joined in, “When Lydia and I first met, she never ate. There were days where I felt like I should have force fed her. She was always too busy or it didn’t occur to her to eat. At the time I thought the lyrium was having a weird effect on her, but her father said that was how she always ate.”

“What changed?” Athena asked softly, desperate to hear more stories of her mother.

“She became pregnant with you, and meals became very important,” Arthur smiled at Athena. She smiled back.

“You’re lucky my Uncle’s a good influence on me,” Dorian grumbled, disappointed that he couldn’t continue arguing with Athena. 

“A good influence? I didn’t think anyone could influence you to be good,” Cullen quipped.

“Ha ha,” Sparkler responded without humor. Athena laughed at both of them.

In the main hall formal introductions were made with Athena’s father, including King Alistair. The meal was incredibly tame and awkward with royalty and Athena’s father present. As we left to do other things, Arthur asked if he could have a moment alone with Athena. They walked out of the main hall and once away from the noise of it, Arthur quietly started, “Your Commander seems like a good man.”

“He is,” Athena wondered why she felt like she should be worried.

“He’s also been through a terrible amount of pain hasn’t he?”

“How would you know that?” Athena refused to answer the question.

“It’s in his eyes. It’s in how he stands, how he walks, and there’s also a great sadness in his voice,” Arthur’s voice was quiet. He knew he had no right, but he had to know if his daughter was being lied to, “My intention is not to pry. I just want to make sure he has told you.”

“I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But I could never love a man that refused to be open and honest with me. I have been lied to so many times that it makes my head spin…” Athena paused not wanting to open wounds that just began to heal. She tried a different tact, “My mother kept a journal. I could only read certain parts of it because most of it was written in a code I had no idea how to read. Cullen taught me the code so I could read my mother’s words for myself, instead of having him summarize it for me. That’s just one example of the kind of man he is. I could tell countless more stories like that. We wouldn’t be standing here without him… at the very least I wouldn’t be. I want to spend the rest of my days with him. I love him.”

Arthur smiled at her, “That’s all I needed to hear. Forgive an old man for trying to be a father too late?”

Athena softly chuckled, "Of course."

“I think this foolish old man is going to turn in for the night,” Arthur was uncertain if he should reach out to hug her or not.

Athena decided for him and hugged him, “Good night.”

Turning away after the hug so Athena wouldn’t see his tears, Arthur whispered, “Goodnight.”

After Arthur left, Athena turned to go up the stairs so she could go back in to the main hall and saw Cullen standing in the middle of the staircase. She smiled as she reached him, “Were you listening?”

Cullen smiled back, “No, I was on my way to get something from my quarters.”

“Oh?” Athena asked as Curly took her hand.

“Come with me?” Cullen asked. Athena smiled in answer. They walked quietly together. Athena thinking back on what Arthur said. Cullen thinking of the future and not wanting to make a fool of himself. When they reached Curly’s office, he asked Athena, “Wait here?”

Athena looked up at him, confused, “Sure?”

Cullen climbed the ladder to his bedroom as Athena perched herself on Curly’s desk. She heard a lot of rustling and heard him mumble, “Where is it?”

“Try lighting a candle,” she called out.

Duchess heard Curly sigh and the rustling stop. She saw a shaky light coming down the ladder. It took Cullen a couple minutes more of searching because whatever he was looking for was buried. He snuffed out the candle and came down, “Ready to go?”

Athena was completely baffled, “Go where?”

“To the garden…” Curly sounded very unsure that this was where he wanted to go.

“Cullen?” She hadn’t seen him this uncertain since they first started courting.

“Please?” He practically begged.

Athena chuckled softly, causing Curly to blush, “You know I would go anywhere with you.”

He chuckled at himself and shook his head, “This could have gone better.”

“I’m not sure what this is so…” Athena trailed off and got off the desk to kiss him.

Cullen breathed deeply, “All will be explained in the garden.”

In the garden, Cullen took her in to the gazebo. The moon was shining on it like a spotlight. 

Sparkler and Arthur were up on the walkway talking and noticed. Arthur got a huge smile on his face, and whispered, “I didn’t think he was going to do it now.”

“Do what?” Dorian asked.

“Watch and listen.”

Athena sat down on a bench and waited for Curly to explain what they were doing… Instead of sitting beside her and talking he turned away from her, pulling a small box out.

Dorian gasped, “He’s not!” Arthur just smiled.

Having Curly turn away from her was the last thing she expected, “Cullen?”

When he turned around, he had one hand behind his back. With his free hand he took one of Athena’s and got down on one knee, “Athena, you have amazed me since we met. Your beauty, kindness, and your will to never give up. Your willingness to sacrifice yourself to save everyone else… are just a few of the reasons I love you.”

“Aww, I love you too,” Athena had tears in her eyes.

Cullen blushed, “Let me finish,” Athena bit her lip to keep from saying more and let Curly continue, “Will you marry me?” Cullen produced a small box and opened it showing a very simple and elegant ring.

Athena bent down and kissed him, whispering her yes against his lips.

Dorian asked more to himself than his uncle, “Did she say yes? I couldn’t hear her.”

Arthur chuckled, “I believe what we’re witnessing would be different if she refused.”

Dorian glanced at his beaming uncle before returning to the tender scene in the garden, “I think you may be right.”

Cullen put the ring on Athena’s left ring finger while he kissed her. When the kiss ended, Athena held up her hand and looked at it, “It’s beautiful. How long have you had it?”

Cullen blushed a little sitting beside her, “Longer than I should admit. It’s the ring my father gave my mother when he asked her. When I told Mia what I was hoping to do after the war ended, she sent it to me.”

Athena kissed him. After a long and tender kiss she stood and led Cullen to her quarters, where they made love most of the night.

Dorian smiled after the lovers disappeared, “She said yes.”

Arthur chuckled, “Obviously. Dear boy, there is going to be a lot of excitement tomorrow, and this old man needs his rest.”

“My father’s older than you,” Sparkler said, not buying it.

“I’ve seen more of life than he has,” Arthur quietly spoke as they went to their rooms.

**

The dawn greeted the newly engaged couple in bed. Athena was laying on Cullen’s chest watching the sun rise through the windows and listening to the gentle thrum of his heart. Curly shifted and Athena lifted her head to see if he was awake. When his eyes opened she whispered, “Good morning.”

Cullen smiled, “Morning. Sleep well?”

Athena’s smile rivaled the just cresting sun, “I did. And you?”

“Very well.” Curly watched as Athena held up her left hand to watch the sun glint off of her new ring, “You didn’t take it off last night?”

She looked at him, horrified, “No!”

Curly laughed, “Do you want to go show everyone?”

Athena kissed him, and said low and sensual, “Not just yet…” Cullen was quite happy to oblige the tone in her voice. After they made love, Athena jumped out of bed like it was on fire and hurriedly got dressed. Cullen laughed at her, getting out of bed himself at a much slower pace. Athena asked, “What?”

"You’re adorable when you’re excited.”

Athena stopped brushing her hair and looked at him, suddenly filled with doubt, “Aren’t you excited?”

Cullen came over and kissed her after he buttoned his pants, “I’m very excited. I’ve also had months to worry about it. Plus, it’s more attractive when you jump for joy.”

Athena shook her head and sighed, “What am I going to do with you?”

Cullen teased, “If that ring’s any indication you’re going to marry me.”

Athena laughed and put down her brush, "It's never coming off so…” she smiled mischievously and sighed, “If I must.” Cullen growled playfully and kissed her.

When they came down for breakfast Athena used her left hand for… everything (which I didn’t notice because she’s left handed.) Ruffles sat down on Athena’s left and immediately noticed. Without saying a word she grabbed Athena’s left hand and studied the ring. Josephine asked, “Is that what I think it is?”

Athena's smile got wider (I don’t know how it’s possible, but I swear to you it did,) from the one she was already wearing, “Yes, it is.”

Ruffles briefly waited for Athena to continue. When Duchess didn’t, she exploded with questions, “And? How? When? Where?” 

Athena laughed at her. Curly looked very smug, which Sparkler noticed and mumbled, “There’ll be no living with him after this.”

"I was waiting for my father and Leliana to join us. I’m not the story teller Varric is,” Athena explained.

“I’ll tell Leliana,” Ruffles offered in an attempt to get Athena to spill.

“My dear, you don’t have to wait on your father. We were…” Dorian paused, “kind of there.”

Cullen and Athena both looked at Sparkler, surprised. Curly said, “There was no one in the garden. How were you there?”

“My uncle and I were up on the walkway talking when you two came in. And… We watched.”

At that moment the missing parties joined us. Ruffles felt it necessary to catch Nightingale up, “The Commander and the Inquisitor are engaged and they were just about to tell us how…”

“Josie!” Athena exclaimed.

“What?” Ruffles asked in innocence.

“The Inquisitor? In front of friends and family?!” 

Ruffles blushed, “Sorry. Please do tell us?”

Athena told us of the engagement, what Cullen said, and of the ring. Which we all “awwed” and Curly blushed (good times.) She did leave out the part about him searching for the ring though (she told me that bit later… After I had to pester her about it.) 

Sparkler asked, “One question, Commander, why wasn’t your list of virtues longer? You should have commented on her beauty far more than once.”

“He tells me I’m beautiful every day,” Athena quietly defended her new fiance, “Love should be about more than looks.”

“I’m still going to tell you your beautiful,” Cullen said just as quietly, putting an arm around her. Athena smiled at him, sending another round of “awws” around the table which got both of them to blush.

Ruffles filled the silence that fell by asking, “Who are you going to have plan your engagement party?”

“Our what?” Athena asked (she got lost in Cullen’s deep brown eyes.)

“Your engagement party,” Ruffles said again.

“That’s a thing?” 

“No one around you ever got engaged?” Ruffles asked. Athena shook her head. “I had no idea circles were so cut off from everything. Yes, it’s a thing every engaged couple does,” Ruffles paused seeing Curly pale, “there will be dancing, dinner, and an official announcement.”

Athena looked at Cullen who shook his head, not wanting any part of the party planning process. Athena begged, completely out of her element, “Josie, will you plan this please?”

“It would be my honor, milady. I’ll invite King Alistair, and Empress Celene, and…”

Athena interrupted her, “Save the huge party for the wedding.”

“Yes, milady. But we do have to have some dignitaries.” Ruffles said.

“Some, not everyone.” 

“Yes, milady.” Ruffles sounded disappointed.

“Josie, you get to plan the wedding too, if you want.”

“Thank you,” Ruffles’ smile almost rivaled Athena’s.

“The Commander’s admirers are not going to be happy,” Leliana said softly. Athena bit her lip to keep from laughing and shook her head at Leliana. Nightingale said, “I’m glad you can still find amusement in it, milady.”

Arthur looked at Dorian, “The Commander has admirers?”

“It’s a long story, Uncle,” Dorian replied.

“It’s not that long.” Leliana launched into her tale, “We had to go to Halamshiral to save Empress Celene from an assassination attempt by Corypheus. Both Cullen and Athena had admirers, but the Commander’s were very bold and when Athena asked him to dance he turned her down by accident.” Cullen was becoming a very bright shade of red at this point.

“Athena handled all of it with such grace and without a single hint of jealousy. I don’t think I could have handled it as well as you did.” Leliana glanced at Athena, causing a pink stain on Duchess’ cheeks, “A couple weeks after our success we started receiving inquiries on the Commander’s marital status, and it’s provided a very fun source of amusement for me.”

“You still get inquiries?" Athena asked.

“On a daily basis.”

Athena laughed, “They’re definitely persistent.”

Poor Curly closed his eyes and shook his head, at least until Athena whispered something in his ear (they still won’t tell me what she whispered.) A slow, smug smile formed, improving his mood.

“Yes, and now I’m going to have to disappoint them all.” Nightingale said with mock sadness.

“Athena, would you mind joining me for lunch?” Ruffles asked.

“Not at all,” Athena chuckled, correctly guessing what the topic of discussion would be about.

“The Commander can join as well,” Josephine was already writing things down, and she had not touched her breakfast.

He looked at Athena ruefully, “No, I can’t. Chess, Dorian?”

“Certainly, maybe you’ll be easier to distract now,” Sparkler answered.

“You play chess?” Arthur raised an eyebrow at his soon to be son in law.

“I do.”

Leliana and Athena looked at each other, noticing that Ruffles had not touched breakfast. And they said together, “Josie, eat.”

“What?” Ruffles looked at both of them and then down at her plate, “oh.” She took a bite of her food and went back to writing.

Athena raised an eyebrow at us, “And I’m the one that gets in trouble for not eating? At least when it’s in front of me I eat. Unlike some other people I know.” She made a point to look at both Ruffles and Curly.

Cullen kissed her and said quietly, “Hush, you.”

Athena shook her head at him, and ordered, “Josie, it can wait ten minutes for you to eat. I’m sure you also have something planned for dinner considering the king is here.”

“Oh yes, there will be a small banquet in honor of King Alistair tonight,” Ruffles was still reading over her list, but she was eating.

Leliana shook her head at Ruffles, “oh, Josie,” and to the rest of us, “have a good day.”

“Well, Duchess?” I asked, wondering what her plans were.

“I don’t think my father has had a full tour of Skyhold yet…” Athena trailed off.

“You are correct, my dear,” Arthur smiled at her. “Commander, would you like to join us?”

“I would like that,” Cullen stood and held his hand out for Athena, which she gladly accepted.

“Dorian, are you coming?” Arthur asked.

Sparkler smiled, “No, I’m sure Varric and I can think of something to do.”

The tour started at the gates, Cullen did most of the talking about Skyhold, since Athena had rarely been there during the war. The tour ended in the garden. Cullen blushed a little as he looked at the gazebo, “As you know, this is the garden.”

“The fortress is beautiful. Do you know the history of it?”

“There aren’t any records that have been located as of yet,” Athena answered, “the gentleman that told us of this place said it belonged to the elves at one point, was abandoned, and then humans came, and abandoned it again…” Athena paused, looking at the gazebo, “until Haven was destroyed.”

“Where is the person that told you of this place?" her father asked.

“He disappeared after Corypheus was defeated.”

“Odd,” Arthur said thoughtfully. He hoped this person didn’t intend to harm his daughter.

Athena chuckled, "Very."

“There you are!” Sparkler walked in to the garden.

Athena looked at Cullen, “I didn’t know we were missing.”

Cullen chuckled, “He was even invited along.”

“Ha ha, I wasn’t talking about you two. I was talking about my Uncle,” Dorian grumbled.

“I was with them,” Arthur joined in the teasing.

Sparkler sighed dramatically, “And here I thought that the Commander was a bad influence. Uncle, you received letters from home, and one from my father.”

“I have to go,” Athena said briefly touching Arthur’s arm.

Arthur smiled down at her, “I understand. Have fun planning your engagement party.”

Athena smiled, “I will.”

Cullen squeezed her hand, “I’ll walk you in.”

“You don’t have to. I don’t want to take you away from beating my cousin again,” Athena said loud enough for Sparkler to hear.

“Athena!”

Cullen chuckled, “I want to walk you in. It gives me a reason to do this…” he kissed her right before they entered the keep. 

Athena leaned into him after the kiss and whispered, “Maybe we should have a private lunch.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “Josephine’s expecting you.”

“Yes, she is.”

They would stop every few feet to kiss. When they finally reached Ruffles she again extended the invitation for Curly to stay. He said, “No, I think it’s better for everyone if I go.”

“If you’re sure, Commander,” Josephine said.

“I am,” Cullen caressed Athena’s cheek, “I’ll see you later.”

Athena watched him leave and then turned to give her full attention to Ruffles. They picked out color schemes, decorations, flowers, etc until Athena collapsed on a chair and said, “Josie, I can’t take anymore.” 

“We need to pick a date,” Ruffles was only half listening to Athena.

“That is something I want Cullen here for,” Athena said after taking a sip of wine.

“Should we go get him?” 

Athena laughed helplessly, “It can wait until tomorrow. I want you to put this away for today, please?"

Ruffles looked at her and sighed, “Oh, all right. This is terribly exciting though! Can I see the ring again?” Athena laughed and held up her hand. “It’s simple and elegant. It’s perfect for you. Since it was his mother’s did he have it sized?”

Athena paused to think, looking at her newly acquired jewelry, “I… Don’t think so?”

“But it fits?” 

“Perfectly.”

“That’s so incredibly odd…” Ruffles mumbled. 

Athena shrugged her shoulders, unable to explain the mystery, “I think I’m going to see if I can steal Cullen away for the afternoon.”

“You’ll be at dinner tonight, yes?” 

“Yes, Josie, we will,” Athena closed the door behind her.

**

In Curly’s office, Sparkler was saying as he moved a chess piece, “You really need to get Athena to play this.”

Cullen looked over the board, “Why?” He moved his piece and said, “check and mate.”

“So this,” Dorian waved his hand expansively over the game, “stops happening.”

Curly chuckled. Arthur had been perusing the books Curly had and asked, “Mind if I have a go?”

“Not at all,” Cullen set the board up again. “Who would you like to play against?”

“Dorian and I have played plenty over the years. I wouldn’t mind playing the man that’s going to marry my daughter,” Arthur answered.

“By all means,” Cullen motioned to the seat across from him, as it was recently vacated by Sparkler. 

Athena came in, saw who was playing, and there was a whispered, “Oh no” that involuntarily escaped her.

Dorian looked over at her, "You may want to find a book."

Athena closed her eyes briefly and then sat on Curly’s desk to watch them. Dorian noticed where she chose to sit and said, “My dear, there are chairs.”

“Why aren’t you using one?” Athena noted that he was standing in front of the desk.

“Because I want to watch.”

"So do I," Athena softly replied as Cullen looked over at her and smiled. She smiled back.

“Trying to learn the game, are we?” Sparkler asked.

Athena chuckled, “Trying to. I fear I’m hopeless though.”

"You're getting better," Cullen assured her as he made his move.

“Lydia and I should have paid more attention to you…” Arthur reprimanded himself.

“Besides our walks at sunrise and eating with her, I didn’t see much of my mother, unless there was an issue,” Athena spoke into the uncomfortable silence.

“I knew she was trying to keep you safe by not wanting you looked at as a “favorite," Arthur said softly.

“From what I would hear other mages say, she spent more time with me than anyone else,” Athena shrugged, this wasn’t a major issue with her.

“And you were okay with that?” 

“Why wouldn’t I be? I didn’t know she was my mother, and I knew she favored me considering the times I saw her it was mainly just the two of us.”

“Wouldn’t all of you be present for your harrowing?” Sparkler asked.

“I was never officially a circle mage.”

“Then what were you?” Dorian asked.

“In terms of the circle?” Sparkler nodded his head so Duchess would continue, “apprentice only… At least until they tried everyone else, then I would be a healer.”

“How did you get out of it?” Sparkler asked.

“I don’t know,” Athena shrugged again.

“You had already gone through one when you tried to save Crystyna,” Arthur responded quietly.

“From what I overheard from some of the mages that came back from their own harrowing, they had to go in to the Fade. The first time I went in to the fade was at The Temple Of Sacred Ashes. When I tried to save Crystyna, none of that happened,” Athena said. 

Cullen looked at her a bit baffled when she talked of the harrowing. Athena smiled at him, “The harrowing isn’t as secret as the Templars would like to believe.”

"That's because ingesting lyrium has a different effect than touching it.” Arthur argued.

Athena shrugged, (how Crystyna died still isn’t her favorite subject,) “I should go get ready for tonight. Enjoy your game.”

Cullen stood and kissed her, “I’ll see you soon.”

Athena made it to her quarters without being stopped by anyone (as rare as finding a unicorn.) Before she got dressed she went out on the balcony and let the tears silently fall, beating herself up for not being able to save Crystyna. And that is how Curly (he was already dressed in formal attire) found her, alarmed that she wasn’t ready, he questioned, “Athena?”

She jumped and tried to wipe the tears away before Cullen would see. He saw anyway, he took one of her hands, and with his other hand reached out and gently moved her head so she would look at him. Her eyes were still filled with tears, he asked, “What’s wrong?”

“I wish I could have saved her,” Athena said brokenly.

“Oh, Athena,” Cullen hugged her, “you did everything you could.” He led her to the couch and they both sat down. Curly watched Athena as she continued to look at her hands. He waited until she looked at him and asked “If you had succeeded in saving Chrystyna, what would have happened to you?”

“I don’t know,” Athena replied.

“If you had saved her would you still be alive?” Athena looked away and shook her head. Cullen waited until she looked at him again. “Do you think Crystyna would have wanted you to sacrifice yourself?”

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “No.”

“Then honor her memory by not blaming yourself over something you couldn’t control,” Cullen’s voice was quiet but firm.

A sigh shuddered out of her. Duchess kissed him and then said a bit shakily, “I love you.”

“I love you too. I think your father may want a rematch.” Cullen said to get her mind off of the past.

“Did you win?”

“Yes, with help from Dorian,” Curly chuckled.

Athena went over to her closet to pick a dress, “I would think that would be the last thing he would want to do.” 

“I may have asked him why he was back to setting things on fire again,” Cullen turned on the couch to watch her.

“Oh, Dorian,” Athena sighed as she pulled out a sky blue dress, “How did you find out?”

“Varric was quite merciless in his teasing…” Cullen smiled and then noticed that Athena was undressing and his thoughts turned to other things that he knew they didn’t have time for, so he quickly stopped watching.

Athena noticed and chuckled, “If you hadn’t been playing chess with my father, we could’ve had all afternoon. I’m guessing my father scolded him as only a Templar could?”

“That he did,” Cullen wondered how soon he and Athena could leave the banquet tonight.

“What prompted you to ask that?” Athena’s dress floated down around her ankles. Fully dressed, she grabbed her brush and pulled it through her long, thick hair.

“Dorian was pestering.”

Athena shook her head, “That seems like a very odd thing for Dorian to do.”

“I agree, but I think they were both worried that Arthur said something to upset you.” Cullen walked over to her.

"Were you worried too?” Athena looked up at him.

“A little, but I thought that you would have said something had that been the case.”

Athena closed her eyes, melting in to his kiss. She sighed after the kiss ended and whispered, “We need to go.” Cullen chuckled.

Ruffles had decorated the main hall in a blue that was a few shades darker than Athena’s dress. When she saw it she murmured to Curly, “Great, I match the table linens.”

Cullen chuckled and whispered, “You’re still the kindest and most beautiful woman I have ever met.”

Her blush was very noticeable. Holding hands they went to find Josephine first, when she saw them she said, “You’re slightly early. Did the afternoon not go well?”

“I got to watch Cullen and my father play chess,” Athena answered.

“When you left my office it didn’t seem like that was what you had in mind…” Ruffles left off.

“It wasn’t,” Athena said sweetly… And it was Curly’s turn to blush.

Ruffles shook her head at him, “King Alistair should be here shortly.” She smiled, “with his queen.”

“You didn’t tell me Anora was coming…” Athena trailed off, slightly worried.

“That’s right! The news came while you were fighting. Anora is no longer Queen of Fereldan. She refused to try for an heir. Alistair asked her to step down and named Selene as his Queen. You missed her by five minutes this afternoon. Needless to say, the king was ecstatic,” Ruffles responded. 

“I’m happy for him,” Athena said.

“I’m guessing because of the chess match you weren’t able to tell the Commander that his presence is required tomorrow?”

“For what?” Cullen asked.

“I’m not picking dates without you,” Athena replied, Cullen groaned, and the ladies laughed.

“That’s the groan of a man in serious trouble,” I said walking up to them. 

“You have no idea,” Cullen griped.

“We aren’t that bad,” Athena said.

“I remember all too well the last meeting I was convinced I was needed for,” Curly complained.

“That was Leliana’s doing. I had only heard about them,” Ruffles said, “and this is more important than paintings.”

“Paintings?” I asked.

“Long story,” Athena and Curly answered at the same time. I chuckled and took my seat to await the arrival of the King and new Queen of Fereldan.

Athena teased softly, “I’m still not choosing dates without you, and I also won’t be choosing what you’re going to wear. I’m not certain Josie would let me in on those meetings, but I’m sure Leliana would be very helpful.”

Cullen looked down at her and saw her wicked smile. He teased, “I’ve had enough of you abandoning me to them.”

“Sorry, my love, but you’re the one that proposed,” Athena teased back.

He whispered, “I wouldn’t have it any other way,” and then they kissed.

The kiss was greeted with applause along with the king and queen of Fereldan. Josephine said by way of explanation to the king and queen, “They’re newly engaged.”

I chuckled, and said to Sparkler, “That’s the reason they kissed in front of everyone.”

"As often as they kiss, one would think the people of Skyhold would be used to it,” Sparkler responded.

“I applaud because I like seeing them blush,” I said.

“Well, there is that,” Sparkler agreed.

Athena and Cullen, of course, turned a very nice shade of red, and turned to face the royal couple, murmuring, “Your Majesties.”

“Inquisitor and Commander,” the royal couple returned (they weren’t blushing.)

“As this banquet is in your honor, would you like to say a few words?” Josephine asked.

Selene smiled and politely declined by shaking her head. Alistair noticed, “You’re not going to give a speech?”

“Not tonight,” Selene responded.

“Why not?” Alistair asked.

“Because I don’t want to. If it’s so important to you, speak,” Selene's tone said she was angry.

“I can’t even get the scribes to listen to me,” Alistair grumbled.

Selene laughed at him, “Alistair, it’s been ten years.”

“I know, but you should see some of the letters that were sent to the Inquisition, they wrote down everything I said, even when I was just thinking out loud.”

“That’s their job, and you're hopeless.” Selene shook her head at him.

Alistair got a smug smile on his face and asked, “Still love me?”

Selene kissed him, “Always.”

“The King and Queen didn’t blush… There’s hope for them yet,” I said loud enough for Duchess and Curly to hear me. Athena shook her head at me fighting a blush and a smile. Curly looked like he wanted the Heavens to open up again.

“Should we take our seats?” Ruffles asked.

“I thought you wanted one of us to speak?” Alistair asked.

“I believe you just did,” Josephine said as gently as possible, which caused Alistair to blush. 

Selene stepped in to save the king, “Yes, please, Ambassador.”

Ruffles showed the foursome to their seats at the head table where there was only room for six. Nightingale was already sitting but stood to hug Alistair and Selene, “It’s so good to see you again.”

“It’s good to see you too, my friend.” Selene directed her attention to Athena once she was seated. “I heard that Morrigan had been acting as liaison to the Inquisition,” a small groan was heard from Alistair.

“Yes, she was. She left after Corypheus was defeated,” Athena answered.

From both Curly and the king, it was whispered, “thank the Maker.” The ladies chuckled at them.

“I see Morrigan left a wide wake for the short time she was here?” Selene asked.

“I never had issue with her, but yes,” Athena answered, “and in her defense, even though she was badly wounded, she had someone heal me first.”

“Oh good, she’s not completely selfish then,” Alistair quipped.

“You never told me you were injured…” Cullen said quietly to Athena.

“Bruises only,” Athena responded just as quietly.

“See Selene, I’m not the only one,” Alistair said, trying to make a point.

Selene shook her head at him and asked Athena and Cullen, “When did this proposal happen?”

“Last night,” Athena answered.

“So when the Ambassador said newly engaged…” 

“She meant it,” Athena smiled at her.

“Congratulations!” Alistair exclaimed.

“Thank you,” Cullen smiled. 

Athena’s father walked in and sat beside Sparkler. She saw him and waved. 

“Who’s that?” Selene asked.

“My father.”

“I thought your father was a mage…” Selene trailed off, thoroughly confused.

“So did I,” Athena said.

“Then how…?” 

"It is an incredibly long story…” Athena trailed off looking for help.

“Selene, I’ll fill you in later,” Leliana jumped in to save Duchess.

After dinner Ruffles ordered the food and some of the tables taken away so there could be dancing. The King and Queen got up to dance and Athena looked at Curly and said, “You’re quieter than usual tonight…”

Cullen half smiled, “I guess my thoughts have taken me elsewhere tonight.”

“You’re not…” Athena trailed off, not wanting to say what she was thinking, but the worry in those violet eyes got her point across.

“No, my beautiful lady, I’m not,” Cullen smiled at her.

"Why aren't you two dancing?" Nightingale asked.

“Would you like to?" Athena asked Cullen hopefully.

“Later," Curly chuckled.

Athena looked at Leliana and quipped, “It’s better than a no.”

Leliana laughed. Cullen shook his head at Athena and quickly kissed her. Arthur came over and asked Athena, “Would you like to dance?”

Athena smiled at him, "I would love to." And off they went dancing. After that Athena was asked to dance with Alistair while Selene sat back down. “It’s been a long time, Commander.”

“It has,” Curly responded.

“Are you happy?” Selene asked.

“I’m very happy. The Inquisitor is an amazing woman.”

“She’s a mage though… Do you trust her?” Selene took a drink.

"I wouldn’t have asked her to marry me if I didn’t,” Cullen watched Athena dance, regretting his decision to save dancing with her for later.

“You asked her?” 

“Yes, I did. Does that surprise you?” Cullen asked.

“A little, yes. You haven’t had a favorable opinion of mages for a very long time,” Selene explained.

“Selene, I remember all too well what happened at the Circle tower. I am sorry for that, but it was over ten years ago. I’ve tried my best to move on and atone for the things in my past. Now, if you’ll excuse me, Athena doesn’t have anyone to dance with,” Curly got up and walked away from the table.

“Hi,” Athena smiled at him. 

Cullen responded by kissing her, and then asked, “Would you like to dance, my lady?”

“Yes, I would,” Athena answered, and they danced for a lot longer than anyone thought they would, and they only had eyes for each other.

Sparkler eventually groused, “I wanted to dance with her.”

I laughed at him, “I don’t think you’re going to get a chance to tonight.”

"It doesn't look that way does it?" 

Arthur smiled at the couple dancing, “No, it doesn’t.”

“Do you think we’d be able to get some privacy now?” Cullen noticed that the crush of people had thinned quite a bit.

Athena chuckled, “Hopefully.” They stopped dancing and went back to their table. Athena noticed that Selene and Alistair had left, “Did we bore the King and Queen?”

“No, not at all. They were anxious for some privacy,” Leliana said.

Curly let out an almost inaudible but relieved sigh. Athena heard and looked at him. Cullen shook his head. Athena asked Ruffles, hopefully, “Does that mean we’re free to go?”

Josephine laughed, “yes.”

“A moment, please?” Leliana asked, and led them in to Josephine’s office. Once the door was closed Leliana continued, “The Queen asked me to apologize on her behalf, Commander. She said that she shouldn’t have brought up the past. Or used the past as an excuse to be nosey.”

"What did she say?" Athena asked.

“I’ll tell you later,” Cullen replied softly; and then to Nightingale, “Thank you, Leliana.”

“You’re welcome. She should have apologized to you herself, though.”

Athena agreed, “The only reason I was ever intimidated by you was because I find you gorgeous. Morrigan also wanted me to apologize to you.”

Curly blushed and coughed in sudden surprise, “Morrigan apologized?”

“I’ll show you the note she wrote,” Athena said.

“I think I’m going to talk to the Queen tomorrow,” Leliana said as they went back in to the main hall.

“Oh?” Athena questioned.

“Maybe it’s because I haven’t seen her in so long, but it seems as though she’s hiding something.” Leliana responded, “have a good night.”

The main hall was empty except for a select few cleaning up. Cullen put his arm around Athena’s and she, his waist, as they disappeared into her quarters. Once they reached the haven of Athena’s quarters, she asked, “I am curious about one thing…”

“Only one?” Cullen teased.

“Ha ha. I remember you telling me that you didn’t know how to dance.”

“I asked Josephine to teach me,” Curly blushed a little.

“Why?” Athena wrapped both arms around him and tilted her head up to look at him.

“Because you like to dance,” Cullen said softly, caressing her cheek.

Athena gasped, practically jumped (she couldn’t because Curly had both of his hands locked at the base of her back,) and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” and they kissed which turned in to much more passionate things.


	23. Chapter 23

Athena was sleeping with her head on Cullen’s chest and was woken up in the middle of the night by him shaking and whispering, “no.” She of course started whispering in his ear, “I love you. You’re an amazing dancer, and I can’t wait to marry you.”

Cullen didn’t wake up but it at least calmed him… For the next hour. The dreams progressively got worse and so did Cullen’s reaction to them. Every time she was able to calm him, but after being woken the second time Athena stayed awake and held his hand. After sunrise the dreams seemed to stop, or at the very least, he wasn’t reacting to them anymore, and she couldn’t fight sleep any longer. Cullen woke to find Athena asleep in a slumped sitting position, and gently moved her so she could lay down, in her sleep, she whispered, “I love you, Cullen.” 

He was grateful Athena was asleep, so she didn’t see the tears that glistened in his eyes. Cullen remembered the dreams all too well, and he also remembered her voice, gentle and soothing, pulling him back from them. He whispered, “I love you, too.”

He gently got out of bed so he didn’t disturb her, put on some clothes and walked out on to the balcony. The dreams hadn’t been this bad since he and Athena started courting. Cullen thought he knew why they were getting worse, and it’s because part of his past decided to be front and center for a change.

Athena woke long after breakfast, asked sleepily for Cullen as she reached out on the other side of the bed for him. When she didn’t feel him there, she sat bolt upright in bed, wide awake. Cullen had turned to come in from the balcony when he heard asking for him, “I’m sorry I caused you a sleepless night.”

Athena gave a sigh of relief, “I’m glad you’re still here.”

“Where else would I be?" He sat beside her on the bed.

“Working,” she smiled at him.

He returned her smile, “Not until after lunch.”

“I slept through breakfast, didn’t I?” Athena tried and failed to get her hair out of her face.

Curly chuckled and helped her, “Yes, you did.”

Athena pulled his hands away from her face and held them, “Cullen, what did Selene say to you?”

"She mainly asked questions and was surprised that I proposed to you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re a mage.”

“So is she!” Athena exclaimed.

“Athena, she hasn’t seen me in over ten years… And when the demons and abominations tortured me at the Circle tower… they used… her.” Cullen looked away from her.

“They were desire demons?” Athena asked gently.

Cullen nodded his head, “I was attracted to her.”

“Did she know?”

“She found out after…” Cullen glanced at her, half expecting her to be angry or jealous, all he found in her eyes was love and understanding, “You’re not upset?”

“Why in the Maker’s name would I be upset?” Athena was very confused.

“It’s been my experience that some would see it as a threat, even though it’s something far in the past,” Cullen explained.

“Well, I’m not like them…” Athena trailed off.

"I know, and it is one of the many reasons I love you.”

“It was over ten years ago, and the only reason I have an issue with it is because it still hurts you,” Athena leaned in to kiss him, which was gently accepted. After the kiss ended, she said, “We told Josie that we would have lunch with her today. Do you want to put it off until tomorrow?”

“No, we have a future to plan for, together,” Cullen responded.

“Then I guess I should get out of bed…” Athena smiled at him.

“Not just yet,” Cullen kissed her, and the kiss turned into making love. They were a little late to lunch…

“You’re late.” Ruffles said as they entered her office.

“Sorry, I wasn’t able to get to sleep until after sunrise,” Athena said. Cullen looked at her, grateful.

“Whatever for?” Josephine asked.

“It happens sometimes,” Athena sat down across from Ruffles with Cullen sitting beside her.

“Are you okay, Athena?” Ruffles was worried.

Athena chuckled, “I’m fine, Josie, it was just a sleepless night.”

“If you’re certain…” Josephine paused, “Commander would you like to know what we decided on yesterday?”

“No.”

“We have to do something while you two eat,” Ruffles was miffed.

“Have you eaten yet?” Athena asked Ruffles.

“Of course not! That would be rude!” 

“Then you need to eat too,” Athena smiled at her friend.

Josephine chuckled, “You two looked amazing last night.”

“I was surprised, considering Cullen told me at the Winter Palace he didn’t know how to dance…” Athena smiled mischievously at him.

“I was impressed with how fast he learned,” Ruffles said softly, “I’m assuming Athena knows….”

Cullen knew he wasn’t getting out this conversation, “She does.”

“When he asked me, it was so incredibly romantic, how could I refuse?” Ruffles gushed.

“I would love to hear that story!” Athena looked back and forth between Josephine and Curly.

Josephine launched in to her tale, “Before the Commander had even said a word, he was blushing, nervous, and pacing.”

Cullen blushed, “You have to give those details, Josephine?”

“But of course!” Ruffles smiled sweetly. Athena kissed him on the cheek, and Josephine continued, “So, I asked him if something was wrong, he responded, “no, I… Um… Athena likes to dance.” And I said “I don’t remember Athena complaining.” He paced a bit more and whispered, “I don’t want to embarrass her, and she told me that you taught her…” I, of course, could not refuse.” 

“How long has this been going on?”

“I asked, after Mia sent you several pages of my childhood,” Cullen said softly.

Athena gasped, realizing the dancing lessons had been going on for months, kissed him and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“When would you two like to have your engagement party?” Ruffles asked. The couple looked at each and then looked at Josephine blankly. She chuckled, “it is best to have the party within six months of being engaged.”

“Well… We got engaged on the 7th of Harvestmere. Josie, you’re the one planning this…” Athena trailed off.

“If you told me that you wanted it tomorrow, I would panic, but it would be done. The wedding takes a bit longer…” Ruffles answered.

Athena looked at Curly, he shook his head at her, “Just tell me when and I will be there.”

"You're no help,” Athena complained. Curly chuckled. Athena asked, "Would Wintermarch be too soon?” 

“Not at all, is there a specific date?”

“Just not on my name-day,” Athena requested.

“And when would that be?” Ruffles asked, writing things down.

“The first.” Athena said quietly.

“The end of the month then?” Josephine asked.

“Yes, please.” Athena pleaded.

“The 30th of Wintermarch it is!” Ruffles exclaimed, “and the wedding?”

Athena looked at Cullen, who once again shook his head. Athena sighed, and closed her eyes, “Solace?”

“So long as it’s not on my name-day,” Cullen responded.

“And when would that be?” Josephine asked.

“The 30th,” Curly answered.

“That leaves 29 other days,” Athena reminded him.

“Are you making me pick?” Cullen asked her. Athena nodded her head. Ruffles laughed at them.

Cullen shook his head, “The 10th.”

“The 10th of Solace it is! And how is it that you two have been a couple for so long that name-days haven’t been at least mentioned?” Ruffles asked.

“My mother would get me a new book, but other than that, it wasn’t celebrated,” Athena said.

“Were other name-days celebrated?” Curly asked.

“Yes, but you forget that I was favored by the Knight-Commander and the First Enchanter,” Athena said gently.

Cullen sighed. Josephine stopped writing and looked right at Athena, “That will be changing with your next name-day.”

“Don’t you have enough to plan for?” Athena sounded a bit nervous.

“Never, but I’m thinking I’m going to have help on this one,” Josephine said. Cullen nodded his head. “Tomorrow we can start picking out clothing!”

“No,” Cullen flatly stated.

“I’m not picking out your clothing,” Athena replied.

“Athena, your designs need to be done first,” Josephine said.

“Don’t try and get him out of this,” Athena responded.

“Oh no, I’m not, and you, my friend, will be able to skip about a week’s worth of meetings,” Cullen paled at what Ruffles said, and Athena laughed.

With the meeting concluded, Cullen and Athena left. They walked to Curly’s office and while walking he asked, “Why didn’t you ever tell me about your name-day?”

“I could ask the same of you…” 

“I had assumed that Mia told you,” Cullen said.

“It never came up, and we were a bit busy saving Thedas. I wasn’t sure if I’d see my next name-day…” Athena said.

“Still…” Cullen felt guilty for not thinking to ask long before now.

“Cullen, we haven’t celebrated anyone’s that has been tied to the Inquisition. It’s okay,” Athena stopped him and kissed him. Then teasing, “I still love you.”

Curly chuckled, “Good. I’m in meetings until at least dinner…”

“I think I’m going to see if Leliana wants some one with her when she talks to Selene,” Athena answered his unasked question.

“Why?” 

“Because of what you said, and I kind of agree with Leliana, there’s something not right about how she was acting last night.”

“You only met her once before last night,” Cullen stood in front of his office door.

“And you know as well as I do that it doesn’t take knowing someone to know when they’re hiding something,” Athena answered.

“True,” Cullen kissed her.

“I love you,” Athena whispered against his lips and left.

**

Leliana was quite easy to find, as they were actually looking for each other. Leliana spoke first, “Hello, Inquisitor, would I be able to get your help with something?”

“Certainly,” Athena responded. 

As they walked to their destination Nightingale filled her in, “I was hoping you could help me talk to the queen. When I went to see them for lunch as we had scheduled, the king said that she was sleeping. Now Selene was never up with the sunrise like you are, but she never slept through the day unless she was up all night, and there was no reason for her to be up all night last night.”

With Leliana’s description a knot of dread landed itself in her stomach, and it kept growing, “I was coming to you to see if you wanted some assistance in talking to her. She said some things to Cullen last night that don’t quite match up to my first meeting with her. The King also seemed quite surprised by her unwillingness to speak last night.”

“That was the first thing that I found odd. Selene always loved to speak. When she and Alistair are together, she is the one talking to the scribes, making sure the king’s thoughts are known without him being embarrassed. And I overheard what she said to the Commander, and again it struck me as odd. In the ten years I have known her, she has agonized over what happened to him. She blamed herself for him not being able to find peace… At least until you two found each other.”

Athena saw that Selene was on the garden walkway, "I guess we’ll find out soon…” Athena paused, “What kind of magic does Selene favor?”

“Usually lightning, she can do a couple freezing spells, and a protection spell,” Nightingale answered.

“She’s never blocked a doorway?” Athena asked.

"I don't think it's in her skill set,” Leliana responded.

“Look closely at the door,” Athena pointed, “You see the green, shimmery, mist?” Leliana nodded, “She’s trying to keep someone out, or keep someone in. How do we approach this?”

Leliana smiled, “I’ll distract her. You knock down that barrier.” Athena nodded and waited for Leliana to make the first move. Running up to Selene, Leliana said, “Oh good, you’re awake. Selene, it’s been so long, we have so much catching up to do… Care to go for a walk with me?” 

Selene was hesitant but went with Leliana. Once they were out of Athena’s range of vision and hearing, she went to the barred door and dispelled it with ease. What she found inside, on the other hand, wasn’t as easy. Alistair was bound, blindfolded, and gagged to the bed, with another barrier around him. There were weird writings all over the walls, ceilings, and floors. 

Athena knew she could break the barrier, but was afraid the writings might undo her magic, or worse. She went out of the room to see if she could find another mage and heard Dorian and her father talking around the corner from her, she quickly grabbed both of them saying, “I need your help,” and pulled them into where Alistair was.

“Maker’s breath,” Dorian breathed.

“I can break the barrier around Alistair, but I don’t know what this is,” Athena looked around the room.

Arthur looked around him, “Desire and envy mixed in to one demon. The writings… If one can call them that, are this demon’s plan of attack.”

“They’re not spells or wards?” Athena asked to be certain.

“No, but to be on the safe side…” Arthur waved his sword around a couple times and a white light started racing around the room cleaning everything except the barrier around Alistair.

“Alistair, I’m going to break the barrier around you now. It’s going to sound like shattering glass. Don’t get scared,” Athena thought that she saw a nod, whispering, “I hope he heard me.” She raised both hands up and meeting resistance, forced her hands down. The barrier shattered much like she said, and a keening wail was heard through out Skyhold. Athena looked at Sparkler and Arthur, “Get him out of here.”

“What about you?” Arthur asked.

“I’ll be fine. Fighting demons is kind of my thing. Go!” Athena ordered, preparing for battle. She also noticed the necklace Selene gave to her to give to Alistair. She picked it up, the sunlight caught it and for an instant it showed a map again. “Good to know,” Athena whispered to herself as Arthur and Dorian helped Alistair out of the room.

As soon as they left Athena could tell by the wind blowing that the demon was rushing to see what had become of her work. The demon screeched (still looking like Selene) outside the door, “What have you done?!”

“Can’t come in now can you?” Athena guessed. The demon growled in response.

“Where is she?” Athena asked, turning her hand like she was locking a door.

The demon tried to move and failed, everything except her mouth was locked in place, “What have you done to me?!”

“You’re in a cage. Where is the queen of Fereldan?” Athena asked again.

“I’ll never tell!” The demon screeched.

“I know she’s still alive, or you wouldn’t be able to hold her form. Where is she?” Athena started closing her hand and the demon screamed in pain.

“Shouldn’t you be more upset that I was traipsing through your lover’s dreams last night?” The demon screeched again.

“I’ll kill you for that,” Athena said cold, emotionless, heartless, and closed her hand even more, “Where is the queen of Fereldan?”

“Never!” The demon screamed at her.

"I should kill you now then?” Athena closed her hand even more (it was almost a fist at this point). And raised her other hand getting ready to snap her fingers.

Instead of answering her, the demon seductively said, “Don’t you want to know what runs through the Commander’s mind when he sleeps? It’s not about you…” 

Athena snarled, "Go to sleep,” and snapped her fingers. The demon crumpled in to a heap.

Leliana looked in, “You didn’t?” 

“She just sleeping,” Athena tried to get rid of her rage and desire to kill the demon.

“Did you want to…?” Leliana noticed the anger in Athena’s eyes.

“If I did, I would kill her,” Athena paused, “Leliana?”

“Tell Cullen I’ll come find him after dinner?”

“Yes, my lady,” Leliana and a few of her scouts picked up the sleeping demon and took it to the deepest part of the dungeon. 

**

Athena left Skyhold and walked several miles before stopping to release all the rage and magic she felt. Fortunately for those in Skyhold, no one was the wiser, they had already heard enough screaming and weirdness for one day. When Athena started her trek back, she saw her father and smiled weakly at him. He asked gently “Tough day?”

“Very. How did you know I was out here?”

“After Dorian and I took Alistair to Cullen, I left to check on you, and I saw you leaving through the gates,” Arthur said as they hooked arms.

“How did you convince Cullen to stay behind?”

“I didn’t need to, he recognized what Alistair had been through.”

Athena closed her eyes to hide the pain she felt for them, “How do you know what Cullen had been through?”

“When we had figured out that you were my daughter and Dorian started singing the Commander’s praises as well, I did a little research, and then Cullen started writing to me… You forget I’m a Templar too,” Arthur explained.

Athena chuckled, “Mia is not going to be happy.”

“Who’s Mia?”

“Cullen’s sister. She’s always telling him that he needs to write more.” Athena answered. Arthur chuckled.

“You have your great-grandmother’s powers,” Arthur praised his daughter.

“On which side?” 

“Your mother’s. When Lydia and I traced back the Trevelyan line, we noticed that certain magical powers would skip generations. Your great-grandmother would have to release the built up energy when things got intense,” Arthur explained.

“That’s how my mother knew!” Athena exclaimed. Noticing Arthur’s confused look, Athena said, “We never really found an answer as to how she knew what to teach me.”

“Now you have one,” Arthur smiled at her.

They walked back to Skyhold in companionable silence. Once they arrived Arthur asked, “Would it bother you if I talked to the demon?”

“Why would you want to?” Athena walked up the stairs to the battlements.

“Sometimes I can bend demons’ wills to get them to tell the truth and we need to find Alistair’s love.”

“Take Cassandra, Leliana, or Dorian with you. Cassandra and Leliana are most likely there already. I don’t want anyone alone with that thing,” Athena responded.

“Understood,” Arthur went in search of Dorian. 

Athena went in to Cullen’s office. Cullen was standing behind his desk looking very worn. Athena said quietly, “Hello.”

Cullen smiled at her and whispered, “Hello.” 

Athena walked over to him and stood on tiptoe to kiss him. She whispered, “How are you?”

“Better than Alistair is,” he said quietly.

“Where is he?” Athena was just as quiet.

“Upstairs, sleeping, finally.”

“I’m sorry,” Athena responded as they walked out of Cullen’s office so they could talk above a whisper. They left the door open to listen for the King.

“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t cause his torment,” Cullen sighed. He wasn’t entirely certain on how to help the king. 

“I should have been here to help,” Athena reprimanded herself.

“Would you have been able to?” Cullen wrapped his arms around her. Athena shook her head in response. "You're here now, and the nights are always the worst,” He remembered all too well the first days (years) after his torture.

“Cullen, I can stay with him if you need a break,” Athena looked into his brown eyes and saw the ghosts of his past lurking there.

“You are all the break I need,” Cullen said softly, kissing her, “I’m kind of surprised that you’re not trying to get answers out of that thing.”

Athena looked away from him, “That’s because I wouldn’t be getting answers. I’m going to let those who won’t kill her on sight interrogate her… my father also said he wanted to talk to it.”

“Why? And when did this conversation happen?”

“He said he can, at times, get demons to tell the truth. On my way back from releasing unwanted energy and magic,” Athena reached up to touch his hair.

“I wondered where he disappeared to.”

“He said he told you…” Athena was confused.

“Arthur said he was going to check on you. Remember this was while you were still fighting. I didn’t know you had left until Leliana told me that you wouldn’t be around for a while,” Cullen explained. Athena nodded her head in understanding. “What did you do to the demon that had it screaming so much?”

“I used an energy cage.”

“Athena, you’re not a typical mage…” Cullen trailed off, not sure if he wanted to know what this cage was.

“You’ve seen people frozen… Well, it’s like that only without the ice… And I could have squeezed the life out of her,” Athena explained.

“And you did that without a staff?” 

“Most of my magic is done without a staff. The energy cage is usually only for defense.”

“You’ve used it before…” Curly put an errant lock of hair behind Athena’s ear.

“I have,” Athena hedged, this was not a conversation she wanted to have today.

“When?” He asked gently.

“Cullen, We’ve had enough bad for one day…” Athena trailed off.

“Athena, when?” Cullen said with a slightly stern tone.

Athena sighed, giving in, and looked in to his deep brown eyes, “When Kern tried to make me his captive…”

“And that’s how you got away?” He asked softly.

Athena looked away, wishing they could talk about anything else, “That was part of it. My father said you had told him about the Circle tower…”

“I did.”

“Why?” Athena looked back at him.

“I thought that if I was going to ask for his blessing, he should know something about me,” Cullen explained.

Athena kissed him, which was interrupted by Alistair calling out in his sleep, “The necklace! The necklace is the way!”

Cullen sighed, “He’s been saying that since he fell asleep.”

Athena took out the necklace she grabbed from Alistair’s room, “Do you think he means this?”

“Possibly. I’m not waking him to find out though,” Cullen smiled at her.

“When the sun caught it today it showed a map. It did that once before but I dismissed it…” Athena held the necklace up to see if moonlight would have the same effect. Cullen looked at her, confused, she blushed and said, “it was after the Emerald Graves.”

“Ah,” Cullen went inside for a moment and lit a candle, “let’s try this.” They held the necklace to the candle light and the map showed up. 

“There was a letter that went along with this… I wonder…” Athena looked at Cullen. She wanted to know they were thinking the same thing.

Cullen nodded, “Go.”

Athena ran to Alistair’s room, lit a candle and started searching for the letter. It took a couple minutes to find it but she did and ran back to Curly. Breathless, she said, “Found it.”

Cullen chuckled at her, and they opened the letter and read it together. After reading it they looked at each other. Cullen said, “She knew there was a demon.”

“What’s this about adopting a baby?” Athena whispered.

“The map shows a cave in between here and Haven. Selene is probably being held there.” Cullen whispered and then ordered, “Get Leliana and find her.”

“Cullen…” Athena waited until he looked at her. Needing to know he’d be all right without her, “the demon said she had been in your dreams last night…”

“It’s nothing I haven’t faced before… And this time it’s only one, if she’s telling the truth,” Cullen responded quietly.

“You can come with us… She’d have no power over you if you weren’t in Skyhold,” Athena requested.

“There’s no one else here that knows what Alistair has gone through. I’ll be okay, Athena,” Cullen hugged her.

“I love you, and I will be back as soon as I can,” Athena kissed him goodbye and left to find Leliana with the necklace and letter.

“I love you, too,” he whispered after her and looked for a book to read while he waited.

Athena knew exactly where Leliana would be, the deepest, darkest part of the dungeon. She ran in to Arthur first, who kept a rapid pace with her, “You’ve found something?”

“We have. First, can she play with people’s dreams?” Athena asked.

“Unfortunately, yes. Especially if they’ve been tormented by demons before,” Arthur understood why that would be the first thing Duchess asked.

Athena closed her eyes and sighed in misery, “Is there a way to stop her without killing her?” 

“Not that I know of, but I will do my best to keep her distracted.”

“Don’t be alone with her,” Athena warned.

“He won’t be,” Dorian said from behind Arthur.

“Thank you,” and then Athena called out, “Leliana!”

“Yes, Inquisitor?” Leliana came out of the cell.

“Let’s go,” Athena ordered.

“I’m coming with you,” Seeker said.

“Be careful,” Athena warned Arthur and Sparkler.

“We will. Go,” Arthur gave an order of his own.

The demon screamed, “The Queen is already dead and I’m coming for you next, Inquisitor! I had Cullen before you and I will have him after you!”

Athena snarled, “You wouldn’t be able to hold her form if the queen was dead. When I come back, you die.”

Before they left Athena stopped to talk to me, “Check in on Cullen for me, please?” 

“Of course, Duchess,” I immediately went to convince Curly to play Wicked Grace.

Athena filled them in on what she and Curly found out as they left Skyhold, “When she wrote the letter, she mentioned something about adopting a baby.”

“Maker’s breath,” Leliana swore. 

“What if this baby is with her?” Cassandra asked.

“We get everyone back to Skyhold as quickly as possible.” Athena replied.

They rode quietly, anxious to get to the cave that was south of Skyhold. Cassandra asked, “Do you think it’s a trap?” 

“I’m sure it’s not going to be easy to get to her… them,” Athena was worried about what they would find.

They reached the cave and Athena had to break through a barrier on the cave. Leliana said grimly, “Looks like we found the right cave.”

They fought through spiders and more barriers, until they reached the end of the cave, where they found Selene, beaten and chained to the cave wall. Leliana swore again, the ladies worked together to get Selene down from the wall. She moaned “Leave me, take the baby,” when she was released from her bonds. 

Leliana said, “Not on your life,” looking around for an infant and then asked Athena, “Can you…”

Athena was already starting to heal Selene when they heard a scream that shook the cave, waking the sleeping babe. Leliana picked up the basket holding the little one and shushed them as Seeker said, “We need to get out of here before we’re trapped as well.”

“Finished,” Athena stood after she finished healing the queen, but she was shaking.

Athena?” Leliana asked as Duchess reached out for the baby, intending to heal them.

“Cassandra’s right, we need to get out of here,” Athena shook even more after healing the babe.

After securing the baby in the basket on her arm, Leliana put Selene’s arm around her shoulders. She helped the queen to her feet and got out of the cave.

Cassandra glanced at Athena and saw she was about to fall. Catching her, she yelled over the screaming cave, “Let’s go.”

Athena nodded weakly. As they made their way through, the cave’s screaming increased, and the cave would tremble. Athena and Cassandra barely made it out before the entrance was blocked by rocks with one final, piercing scream.

“Thank the Maker, you made it,” Leliana sighed in relief. 

Athena was regaining her strength, “We need to get the Queen and the baby back to Skyhold.”

“What about you?” Seeker asked.

“I’m fine. But I was only able to heal some of their injuries,” Athena answered.

“And we’re exposed,” Cassandra kept a weather eye around them, anticipating attackers.

“What do we get them back with?” Leliana asked.

Athena looked around and gathered up some branches. She tied them and a horse blanket together. Selene moaned again. Cassandra wondered, “Why isn’t the queen talking?”

“She’s sleeping,” Athena answered, “we’re going to have to tie this to two horses and it is going to have to sit off the ground between them.”

“Athena?” Leliana wondered why Athena needed to put the Queen to sleep.

“She would have died if I hadn’t. I wasn’t able to heal her most grievous wound, but by putting her to sleep I was able to slow the bleeding down,” Athena said.

“That’s why you were so weak.” Cassandra had new admiration for our leader.

“I don’t know. She was in a great amount of pain.” Athena said, “There’s nothing more I can do for her, we need to get her back to Skyhold.”

Without another word the makeshift cot was strapped to the horses and Selene was laid on top of it, with the baby tucked in at her side. Leliana and Cassandra took the horses that had Selene on the cot. Leliana told Athena, “Ride ahead, we’ll follow as we are able.”

“I can’t, if the spell doesn’t last, I’ll have to cast it again.”

“Is that safe for you?” Cassandra asked.

“Not really, but we don’t have an alternative,” Athena responded and another moan went up from Selene, “Tie her to the cot.”

They rode as quickly as they could. About an hour away from Skyhold, Athena had to redo the spell, making her too weak to ride, “It will get you to Skyhold.”

“We can’t leave you here,” Cassandra made to get off her horse. 

“You can and you will. I will start riding again when I’m able,” Athena commanded, stalling Seeker in mid-motion.

“Athena…” Leliana implored. Surely there was some way they could all go back together.

“Go!” Athena shouted with the last of her strength. 

Nightingale and Seeker rode back to Skyhold. As soon as they entered the gates, Cassandra jumped off of her horse, got a fresh one, and galloped back to Athena. Bull was there and saw what transpired, “Where’s the Boss?” 

"She told us to ride ahead,” Leliana said after yelling for a surgeon.

Bull asked, “Krem?”

The Chargers were already mounted and ready to ride. Leliana said, “Follow Cassandra.”


	24. Chapter 24

Cullen and I had no idea what happened at the front gate (thank the Maker.) We were listening to Alistair screaming in his sleep about how the demon needed to let him go and to tell him where Selene was. Close to sunrise I told Curly, “Curly, why don’t you go to Athena’s quarters and get some sleep? I’ll stay here.”

“Thanks, Varric, but I’d rather not,” He said quietly.

“Athena’s going to be very upset with you if you pass out on her,” I warned.

Curly half heartedly chuckled, “You’re right.”

“Still not going to are you?”

Cullen shook his head, “When Athena gets back.” 

“She may not be back for a while yet,” I reminded him.

Cullen looked away, not wanting to let on that sleeping wasn't going to be possible for him until Athena was back. Alistair started stirring. He went up to explain to the king where he was and that Athena was out looking for Selene. Curly came down the ladder and sighed. 

“I thought this whole saving Thedas business was supposed to get easier,” I said quietly.

Curly smirked, “So did I.”

Alistair came down with a haunted look in his eyes as breakfast was served. Curly noticed Alistair wasn’t eating, and he said quietly, “I know it’s hard but you have to try.”

Alistair closed his eyes, “Everything feels as though it’s on fire.”

Cullen nodded his head, understanding, “That feeling fades after a day or two.”

“I’m going to see if I can find out anything,” I said.

“Thanks, Varric,” Curly said to my retreating back. 

Shortly after, I ran into Seeker and Nightingale on the walk way to the keep arguing over who should have told what, when.

“Someone should have told them immediately!” From Seeker.

“I thought I would honor Athena’s wishes in getting help for Selene first,” Leliana argued.

“They’ve both been back for hours. When were you planning on telling them?” Cassandra snarled. 

“You could have told them,” Leliana was unfazed.

“I just left Athena ten minutes ago!” Cassandra shouted.

“And you thought I left Selene’s side hours ago?” Leliana shouted back.

“What happened?” I interrupted, tired of the back and forth.

“When we found Selene, she was near death and there was also a baby that needed to be healed. Athena had to heal and keep Selene asleep twice to be able to get them back to Skyhold.” Leliana explained.

“And Athena?”

“She was unable to ride anymore after the second round of spells, and told us to leave her behind.” Seeker said.

“Where is Athena now?” I was angry.

“In her quarters, but when I found her she was unconscious and…” Cassandra paused and looked away, “hasn’t woken up yet.” 

“Selene is still being healed, but she’s awake,” Leliana said quietly.

“You want Curly and the King to hear you two out here arguing?” I asked. They both looked at their feet, “I’m going to find Sparkler and Athena’s father. You two need to find a way to tell them without shouting at each other.”

They went to Cullen’s office and sat down before speaking. Cullen waited for them to start, when they didn’t he asked what was most important to him, “Where is she?”

“In her quarters,” Cassandra answered.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Cullen asked, he had never seen Leliana and Cassandra so hesitant to speak.

“Athena saved Selene’s and a,” Leliana looked at Alistair, “baby’s life.”

Alistair rasped out, “Take me to Selene.” Leliana looked at Cassandra who nodded her head. Leliana and Alistair left. 

Cassandra waited until the door behind them closed, “She performed what she called a sleeping spell and healed both of them as much as she could. She was able to heal the baby completely, but some of Selene’s wounds were too grievous. After the second round of spells, Athena was too weak to ride anymore and told us to leave her there.”

Cullen closed his eyes, “She would.”

“As soon as we got Selene in the gates I jumped on a free horse and rode out to get her. When I found her, she was unconscious,” Cassandra paused, “I’ve had everyone I could think of try to heal her, nothing’s worked.”

Cullen nodded his head, stood, and went to Athena’s chambers at a run. He opened her door gently, not sure what he was going to find. When he saw her it looked as though all she was doing was sleeping off a rough night. Ruffles was sitting beside Athena, holding her hand, she stood and whispered, “Commander.”

Cullen took Josephine’s recently vacated seat, bent down and whispered in Duchess’s ear, “I love you.” There were tears in his eyes when he sat straight.

Dorian and Arthur came in not long after. Dorian said quietly before Cullen could ask, “Varric told us.”

“Commander, may I?” Arthur asked. Cullen nodded his head and stood.

Arthur slowly investigated his daughter, “It’s similar to when she tried to save Crystyna. She took on a great deal of pain without any way or time to protect herself from it, and was unable to release the built up magic. She’s in a deep sleep, but it is only a sleep.” Sparkler and Curly breathed sighs of relief. He continued, “However, it is a sleep that it will take weeks for her to wake from if we let it work itself out on it’s own.”

“What do we need to do?” Cullen asked.

“You’re going to have to hold her down. Dorian and I will do the rest,” Arthur said.

“What are you talking about?” Sparkler asked.

“You’ve seen her do one of her releases?” Arthur asked. Dorian nodded, “That’s what she needs, only we’re going to start it, control it, and finish it.”

“Why does she need to be held down?” Dorian inquired.

“Can’t lift the magic from her if she’s being lifted with it,” Arthur smiled. He knew this was not something Dorian had experience with.

While they were talking, Curly had situated himself and Athena so he could hold her down for as long as it took, “Ready when you are.”

“It’s your basic levitation spell for you, but focus on the magic instead of the person. The Commander and I will weaken the magic so it can be lifted,” Arthur focused his abilities on his daughter.

Cullen had Athena laying on him. He had crossed her arms and had his crossed over hers to hold her hands. He was weighing down her legs with his, all the while using his Templar abilities to weaken the magic that was holding his love captive. 

The spell took an hour to complete with the magic slowly rising in the air and away from Athena and outside far in to the sky it went where it could be released safely, it looked like a firework. Once the magic was released, she turned on her side, murmured Cullen’s name, and cuddled his arm like a child would a teddy bear. “I don’t think you’re moving for a while, Commander,” Arthur chuckled.

Curly chuckled, “I think you’re right. Arthur?”

“Yes?”

“Please, call me Cullen?” Curly asked.

Arthur nodded and smiled. Dorian asked, “What about me?”

“No,” Cullen said with a straight face even though he was joking.

“He’s known me longer, and I still have to call him Commander,” Sparkler griped.

“You’re not going to be his father in-law,” Arthur argued.

“No, but we will be cousins,” Dorian said.

Arthur shook his head at him, and looked at Curly, “I doubt she’ll wake before sunset.”

“But it’s a normal sleep and it’s not going to take weeks,” Cullen spoke quietly as he looked down at her.

“Cullen,” Arthur waited until their eyes met, “you need rest too.”

Cullen nodded in understanding, “Have a good day.”

Arthur and Sparkler left Curly with the love of his life. Cullen closed his eyes, a tear or two eked out, a sigh of great relief shuddered through his body, and soon he was sleeping... Unfortunately the dreams started fast and furious. Ones where Selene would look like his first lover, and then Athena, and then demon. Arthur had come back to make certain they were both sleeping close to dinner time, and heard Cullen calling out. Arthur touched Cullen on his shoulder and said, “Cullen, it’s just a dream.”

It was enough to startle Cullen awake. Fortunately the jolt didn’t seem to bother Athena much. Arthur asked, “How long have you had the dreams?”

“Since the fall of the circle tower in Fereldan,” Cullen whispered, not wanting to wake Athena. He carefully extricated himself from underneath her so he and Arthur could talk on the balcony.

“For over ten years then,” Arthur stated. Cullen nodded, standing so that he could watch Athena. “Were they getting better?”

“In a way… Athena is usually able to pull me back from them so I can get a moderate night’s sleep. Since the demon’s showed up though…” Cullen trailed off.

“That’s one reason as to why I’m here. I’ve been talking to this creature. It claims that it was human at one point and went by the name of Brigidh, it also claims you two were in a relationship.” 

“Before I took my vows, I briefly courted a woman named Brigidh, it ended before I took my vows,” Cullen answered. 

“If this is the same person, she says she wants you back. She saw the king and queen of Fereldan as her way to get to you and Athena.” Cullen briefly closed his eyes and Arthur continued, “Did this Brigidh perform magic on you? Or play with your dreams?”

“At times,” Cullen opened his eyes, tamping down whatever emotion he was feeling, and watched Athena kick the blankets off of her, only to get instantly cold and pull them back. Curly smiled at her sleep antics.

“How much time was between that and what you suffered at the Fereldan circle?”

“At least two years from my vows.”

“I’m sorry for all the questions. I just want to sort fact from fiction.” Arthur changed the subject to something less emotional for Cullen, “The baby that was rescued was fully healed by Athena.”

“And Selene?” Cullen was disinterested in the answer, but thought it was the polite thing to ask.

“Weak, but alive. If Athena hadn’t done what she did, both would have died,” Arthur looked at his sleeping daughter, “Does she always sleep that way?” 

“Not usually,” Cullen chuckled. Athena was laying sideways on the bed with the blankets wrapped around her like a cocoon, “Have you heard anything on Alistair?”

“He’s already asked Selene if they could keep the baby. But he has a haunted look to his eyes that wasn’t there before.” 

“But he has something worth fighting for,” Cullen almost wished he could go back and show young Cullen a glimpse of what life would become. Maybe, he wouldn’t have been as angry if he had had something to live for besides an oath.

“That is true. You were all alone?”

“Yes, it makes it very hard to hold on to hope or even believe that living is worth while…” Cullen paused, watching Athena struggle within her cocoon, “what is she doing?”

Arthur laughed, “I think she’s awake.”

Cullen walked in and heard a muffled, “help” coming from the cocoon of blankets. He couldn’t help but chuckle and started to help her get out, but the more she wriggled the more stuck she got. Cullen finally ordered, “Athena, stop, you’re only making it worse.”

He thought he heard a muffled “can’t breathe” but couldn’t be sure until he unwrapped her face. When that was accomplished Athena sucked in a great big breath of air and exhaled saying, “Thank you.”

Cullen laughed, “Lay still and I’ll untangle the rest of you.”

Arthur came in from the balcony, “Need a hand Cullen?”

Curly laughed helplessly, “I might… Athena I think you’re laying on the edge of the blankets. You’re going to have to roll over.”

Athena groaned which had them both laughing. Cullen was right, she was laying on the edge. He grabbed the edge by her shoulders, “I’m tempted to stand you up and spin you out of the blanket.”

“Ha ha,” Athena was decidedly not laughing.

"I'm sorry, my love, but you are going to have to stand.” Cullen tugged on the corner by her shoulder. There was no give to it.

“Athena, do you think you’re strong enough to stand?” Arthur asked.

“Yes,” she tried to stand and almost collapsed.

Fortunately, Curly was right there to catch her at the waist. He shook his head at her, “Strong enough to stand?”

Athena blushed, “I tripped.”

Cullen held onto her with one arm and unraveled the blankets with help from Arthur. After she was unwrapped and sitting on the bed, Cullen asked, “How are you feeling?”

“Weak,” Athena, of course, was more concerned with those she tried to save, “Did Selene….?”

“Selene and the baby are just fine, thanks to you,” Arthur interrupted her.

“What about Alistair?”

“He’ll survive. The King, most likely, has two very good reasons to not give up,” Cullen said quietly.

"And the demon?" Athena asked.

“Still alive, for now… She has several people that would be only too happy to send her in to the Fade,” Arthur answered.

“I want to see her.”

“You can barely stand, much less walk,” Cullen reprimanded. There was no way he was letting her endanger herself when she was so weak.

“Athena, Cullen is right. She will keep until morning.”

“I’m not letting her torture another person,” Athena willed her weakened body to heal immediately, to no avail.

“And what would you be able to do against her?” Cullen knew she would sacrifice herself for others, but she should at least heal first.

“There’s more than one way to kill a demon,” Athena argued.

“You. Can. Barely. Stand,” Cullen spaced out each word. He would not allow her to sacrifice herself just to kill a single demon. 

“Athena, let me have one more night with her. She’s in demon form now, so the links are broken. She won’t be doing any damage to anyone tonight,” Arthur hoped his reasoning would help support Curly.

“Except to the one she already has a history with,” Athena looked at Cullen, tears of frustration and worry shining in her violet eyes.

“Ah, now this makes sense,” Arthur understood where her obstinacy was coming from now and tried to allay her fears about the demon attacking her love. “We don’t know that for certain. She could be lying.”

“I guess there’s only one way to find out,” Cullen said quietly.

"No!" Athena would have shouted if she had the strength.

“I’ll go with him, and I won’t let him out of my sight until he’s back with you,” Arthur offered.

“No,” Athena whimpered, tears of frustration and helplessness filling her eyes.

“Athena…” Cullen paused as her tears overflowed and hugged her, “It’s my turn to confront my past, if that is even what this is. This time I have the advantage.”

While Cullen assured and reassured Duchess that no harm would come to him, Arthur went to find someone to stay with Athena. He found Sparkler and Ruffles. He asked, “Would you mind staying with Athena until the Commander and I return?”

“I would be happy to,” Ruffles said. 

“The Commander wants to talk to the demon?” Sparkler correctly guessed.

“Wants… No. More to prevent Athena from killing herself by trying to kill it. She’s isn’t able to stand yet.” Arthur explained.

“Maybe we should get Varric and play Wicked Grace,” Ruffles suggested. (It wasn’t really a suggestion though, for some reason they all had the idea I could get Duchess to listen.)

“My lady,” Dorian nodded and came to get me.

Arthur returned to Athena and Cullen with Ruffles. Ruffles hugged her and said, “If you ever find a need to do that again, wait until I go back to Antiva.”

“Maker willing, she won’t ever have to again,” Cullen was still holding Athena, “and the next adventure you go on, I’m going with you.” 

Athena half smiled at him, trying to not think of the danger he was putting himself in by going to the dungeon. She whispered, “I love you.”

He kissed her and said, “I love you, too.”

Right after Curly and Arthur left, Athena tried to stand, and collapsed back on to the couch. Ruffles shook her head at her, “I’ll have Varric or Dorian sit on you.” 

**

Curly and Arthur went deep in to the bowels of the dungeon. Upon Cullen’s approach of the cell the demon changed in to Brigidh. Cullen gasped in surprise. Arthur heard his gasp and asked, “Accurate?”

“Very.”

“I want you back, Cullen,” the demon said seductively, “we had such fun together, my little fool.”

“A fool am I?” Cullen was indifferent to the taunt. 

“Why else would you let someone practice magic on you? You’re a Templar. You should have known better. And then getting fooled by me again last night,” the demon laughed.

“Why are you here? If you are Brigidh, what happened to you? Did the magic get to be too much for you?” Cullen stood in front of the cell.

The demon hissed, “I’m here for you. I enjoy my new form, no lyrium or blood. All I do is think it and it appears.”

“Why would you want me?” 

“I want to break your heart like you did mine,” the demon growled, fading back to her true form from Brigidh's.

"You’re not going to get the chance,” Cullen quietly warned.

“But I am. I’m already inside Athena’s head. She doesn’t really love you. I do,” the demon laughed.

“If you’re inside her head, what’s she thinking? Doing? Hearing?” Cullen hoped his fear that the demon was telling the truth didn’t show in his questions.

The demon growled, upset at being caught in a lie, “I still love you. She doesn’t, she’ll throw you away just like you did to me.”

Cullen had heard enough. He drew his sword and plunged it deep in the demon’s chest. As she died, she turned back in to Brigidh once more and whispered, “Thank you.”

Arthur and Cullen walked silently back to Athena’s chambers. Arthur smiled to see his daughter laughing, “I told you that I’d bring him back.”

Athena was holding her sides from laughing so hard. (At least that was what I thought at the time.) I was telling a story of how Sparkler was so drunk that he kept walking in to walls. 

Dorian was bright red, “Good, they’ve returned!” And beat a hasty retreat. Ruffles and I cleaned up, said goodnight, and left. 

Arthur hugged his daughter before leaving, “I’ll let you two have some privacy.”

Athena watched Cullen clean off his sword. She waited patiently for him to start talking. When Athena realized he wasn’t going to volunteer anything, she asked, “What happened?”

“She’s dead,” Cullen did not want to go into details.

“And?” Athena stood to walk over to him. She was worried as to why he wasn’t talking to her. Duchess made it half a step and needed to sit back down. She sighed in frustration and pain.

Cullen saw that she had stood and warned, “Athena…”

“Talk to me,” she interrupted.

"I'm sorry," he put his now clean sword in his scabbard, “It was, at least in part, Brigidh.”

Athena watched him walk over to her. When he sat down beside her, he took her hand and she winced. Cullen was concerned, “Are you in pain?”

“A little… Before waking up here the last thing I remember was telling Cassandra and Leliana to go on without me.” Athena searched his eyes, “What happened?”

Cullen sighed. He knew she wasn’t going to let it go until she heard everything, “She said that she still loved me, claimed that I broke her heart, and that you didn’t love me. I killed her…”

“I’m sorry,” Athena wanted to reach out and hug him, but everything hurt.

“You were right, she wasn’t going to stop. As she was dying she changed back to Brigidh and thanked me.”

“Who was her intended target?” Athena feared that she already knew the answer.

Cullen stared into her eyes. Maker, he didn’t want to tell her after all she’s been through, “Does it matter? She’s dead.”

“Yes, it matters. What if she was able to recruit others like her? We need to protect whomever she was after.” 

“That protection won’t be needed. She was after me.” Cullen looked away from her.

“I should have killed her when I had the chance,” Athena reprimanded herself.

“You did the right thing, Athena. You didn’t know where the real Selene was, you don’t know what would have happened to her. They may have died if you had.”

“But it would have saved you this,” she winced as she shifted.

Cullen shook his head, noticing the wince, “I would have always questioned what she could have told us. At least now we have her version of events.”

“She was no help in finding Selene and tried to trap us in the cave. Cassandra and I barely escaped,” Athena argued.

Cullen closed his eyes to hide the guilt he was feeling, “I should have been with you.”

“Cullen, I understood the reasons you stayed behind. You were right to stay behind. Alistair needed you,” Athena needed him to know that none of this was his fault.

“So did you,” the words tore through him, leaving him raw. 

“And we could have taken someone else with us but didn’t think to.”

“Never again,” Cullen whispered hoarsely and kissed her, eliciting a not fun moan from Athena. She smiled weakly at him. 

Cullen said softly, “Cassandra said she had every kind of healer here trying to wake you up. I guess they were more worried about getting you awake than healing injuries. Where do you hurt?”

Athena closed her eyes to hide her tears, “Everywhere.”

As gently as he could, he picked her up from the couch and carried her to bed. Once he had laid her in bed and covered her, Cullen ordered, “No moving and no wrapping yourself in a blanket so tight you can’t breathe.”

Athena’s chuckle was interrupted by a sharp pain from her ribs, “Even if I wanted to, I can’t.”

"I'm going to go find someone to heal you,” Cullen was off to find a healer. Within fifteen minutes Curly was back with a healer. Athena was almost asleep.

“Athena?” Cullen said softly, not wanting to wake her if she was asleep.

“Hmmm?” She mumbled not opening her eyes.

“The healer is here.”

“She’s fine just as she is, Commander,” the healer said and went to work in figuring out the injuries before she started healing. After a couple minutes, the healer said, “I don’t recall the Inquisitor being near death.”   
“That’s because she isn’t- wasn’t,” Cullen was very confused.

"Has she healed someone who was?”

Curly closed his eyes. Athena had healed two someones that had been near death, “Yes.”

"There's also injuries related to a fall of some height... Maybe off of a horse?" 

“Can you heal her?” Cullen asked quietly. He guessed that the fall must’ve happened when Athena was by herself.

“I can heal the broken bones and the bruises, but with everything that’s injured I’m surprised she’s not screaming in pain.” The healer said.

“Heal what you can.”

"Yes, Commander," and the healer went to work. An hour later the healer finished, “She’s going to have to stay in bed for several days. I am sorry that I can’t help her more.”

"Thank you,” Cullen walked the healer to the door. Little did they know that when the healer started moving Duchess’s arms and legs around that the pain became too much to bear and Athena passed out again. 

When Cullen returned to her, he laid down beside her and stroked her hair, “You can fight off dragons, a thousand year old magister dark spawn, demons, mages, and templars, with barely getting a scratch on you. Then you take a two hour ride to save one woman and a baby, and you come back far worse than anything Corypheus threw at you. How is that possible?” Pausing to fight the lump that rose in his throat he whispered, “I love you.”

Athena shifted and murmured, “I love you too.” Tears sprang to Curly’s eyes, relief that she was alive, and guilt for not going with her meant he was not getting any sleep tonight.

The morning dawned far too early for Curly and Duchess. Every time Athena would shift she would moan in pain. Cullen was afraid to touch her, not wanting to make the pain worse. 

Arthur came in right before breakfast to check on his daughter. Hearing her moan he asked Cullen, “How long has she been in pain?”  
“It became noticeable after everyone left last night. I had a healer come in, but they said the pain was from healing someone near death and that she had injuries from a fall. The healer wasn’t able to heal everything.”

“Similar things happened when she tried to save Crystyna. She was weak for a long time,” Arthur smiled sympathetically.

“Cullen?” Athena asked sleepily.

“Shh, I’m right here, go back to sleep,” he said softly.

Athena shifted from her side to her back so she could look at Curly, “The healer couldn’t heal everything.”

“You remember that, do you?” Cullen asked.

“I remember them coming in and moving my arm, but not much else.” Athena despised that she felt so weak and was still in pain.

He gazed into her violet eyes and barely caressed her cheek with his thumb. Athena, enjoying the caress closed her eyes, which Cullen misread, “I’m sorry.”

Athena’s eyes flew open, “You’re not hurting me. I was enjoying it.” 

Arthur had gone over to Athena’s bookshelves while they were talking. Finding the book he was looking for, he said softly, “Aha.”

Which startled Athena because she hadn’t realized her father was in the room. She jumped and sent a fresh wave of pain through her barely healed body.

“What did you find?” Cullen didn’t take his worried gaze from Athena.

“The right book,” Arthur sat at Athena’s desk and flipped through the pages.

“Now we know where Dorian gets his crypticness from.” Athena quipped. Cullen chuckled.

Arthur laughed at himself, “I’m sorry. It’s a book on envy and desire demons.”

“And you found that in my library?” Athena found that weird.

“Yes. Is that odd?”

“Very. Until a couple years ago demons were never really my thing. And I’ve looked at those bookshelves hundreds of times and never saw it.” Athena wondered out loud, “Was Cole here?”

Cullen shook his head, "He wasn’t here last night.” 

Athena tried to sit up and winced as another wave of pain washed through her, “You didn’t get any sleep?”

Curly ignored her question and chastised, “You should be laying down.”

“I don’t want to lay down. Did you get any sleep?” Athena slowly maneuvered herself to a sitting position. Duchess sighed when she was finally sitting, she let her head fall back and whacked it on the headboard. (Duchess, you make a horrible patient.)

Cullen put a pillow behind her head, “You don’t need to worry about me. You need to get better.”

“This isn’t the first time I’ve taken on too much, and I survived. Cullen, I love you, that means I’m allowed to worry about you. It’s written in the love handbook, rule number three,” Athena said. Her father couldn’t help but chuckle at her response.

Cullen chuckled thinking this was some thing I made up and told Duchess about, "It’s good to see you haven't lost your sense of humor.”

"I'm being serious, there's a love handbook and I've read it."

“Who’s it by?” Cullen dreaded her answer.

“Varric!” Athena smiled and Curly groaned.

“Found it!” Arthur exclaimed, “Athena, did you use your abilities on Selene and the baby before leaving the cave?”

“Yes, if I hadn’t we wouldn’t have been able to leave.”

“Did you notice if there were any writings on the walls like in Alistair’s room?” Arthur flipped through more pages.

“We had to fight through spiders and barriers to get to Selene. We could barely see her at the back of it, and we wouldn’t have known where to find the baby if they hadn't cried.”

Arthur sat on the other side of Athena and gently patted her hand, “When you tried to save Crystyna, you were weak, but not in pain... If this book is correct, the demon did have a small hold on you because of your using magic in what she claimed as home. Her powers came from writing things to make where ever she was her home.”

“Athena is suffering because of me?” Cullen felt even more guilt washing over him. Athena took hold of his hand and squeezed it even though it hurt her.

“Cullen, she was already in pain, her bones were already broken. If you hadn’t killed the demon when you did, she could have done far worse, possibly even killing Athena. I want to see this cave. If there are writings there and we can remove them like in the King’s chambers... I think your pain would stop,” Arthur said the last to Athena.

“Cassandra knows how to get there, but it’s caved in now… If you go, take Dorian with you?”

“I will,” Arthur kissed her forehead. He also made a point to look at his future son in law when he said, “You two should get some rest.”

“She’s not moving from the bed,” Cullen said to Arthur’s retreating back. 

“I will have to at some point, and you should have at least tried to sleep last night,” Athena reprimanded her fiancé.

“I’ll sleep when you’re better,” Cullen said quietly.

“How are you going to take care of me if you get ill yourself?”

Curly looked away from her. He knew she was right, but he didn’t want to admit it. So, he changed the subject… Kind of, “With all the fighting you did during the war and defeating Corypheus, how is it possible that you are more injured now?”

“I didn’t have to heal an infant and an adult twice?” Athena guessed.

“Was Selene injured?”

“Initially, there wasn’t time to find out, so I did all I could to get her out of there. As soon as we released her from her chains, the screaming started and we could feel the cave trembling.”

Cullen closed his eyes, feeling guilty again, “I should have been with you.”

“Cullen, Selene and the baby weren't the demon's only victims. Do you think anyone else would have been able to help Alistair when he woke up?” Athena paused, “Have you seen him since yesterday morning?”

“No, and I’m not leaving you. I’m sure he understands,” Cullen stated emphatically.

“You should go check on him. I’ll be fine.” Athena wanted to toss the covers off of her so she could go to the garderobe, but her arms wouldn’t cooperate.

“What are you doing?” Cullen was astounded that Athena looked to be trying to leave the bed.

“I have to use the garderobe,” Athena had slowly pulled the covers back and inched toward the edge of her bed.

“Oh, um…” Curly blushed, “I’ll send someone to help.”

As he quickly left, Athena ruefully shook her head and slowly stood. Each step she took to the garderobe sent fresh waves of pain through her, but she was walking (at a turtle’s pace,) and was able to use it without assistance. On her way back to bed, she tripped and fell to her hands and knees. Without anything to stabilize her so she could stand, she made her way by crawling. That was how Cullen and Josephine found her. 

“Athena!” Josephine exclaimed. 

Curly picked her up and carried her back to bed. Athena griped, “I can walk.”

“You couldn’t wait?” Cullen was not even attempting to hide his frustration.

“No, I couldn’t,” Athena didn’t bother to try to hide her frustration either.

“Commander, there’s something that I need to talk to Athena about. Would you mind giving us some time? I won’t leave until you return,” Ruffles sensed the tension between our lovers.

Cullen nodded and left. He desperately needed time to think, or hit something. 

Athena let out a frustrated sigh. Ruffles asked softly, “Have either of you had anything to eat lately?”

Athena thought for a moment, “No.” 

“If I leave to tell someone to bring breakfast here, will you stay in bed?” Ruffles wanted Duchess’s word.

“Yes.” 

“I’ll be back in less than five minutes,” and Josephine was good on her word. Food was right behind her. After Ruffles prepared a plate for Athena and waited until she started eating. Josephine said, “The Commander is worried about you.”

“I know.” Athena said quietly.

“In fact, we’re all worried about you,” Ruffles gently reprimanded.

Athena looked up at her with tears in her eyes, “He blames himself and he’s afraid to touch me.”

Josephine gently hugged her, “Have you talked to him about this? I’m thinking it’s because he doesn’t want to cause you more pain.”

Athena shook her head and winced in pain. Ruffles chuckled softly, “Don’t do that. You always talk to him first. Why is this time different?”

Athena sighed, deeply, “I had been so careful to not be in a situation again where I had to exceed my limits…” She stopped, knowing that what she was saying was only partially true. Athena decided to be completely honest with her friend, “The demon that caused all of this chaos used to be human.”

“And?” 

“The human had been in a relationship with Cullen,” Athena’s voice dropped to barely more than a whisper.

Ruffles gasped, “Maker!” After she composed herself, she asked, “What does that have to do with you?”

“She was a mage.”

“And you’re worried that the Commander thinks that you could turn in to her,” Ruffles spoke Athena’s fears out loud.

“Can you blame me?” Athena’s tears were back.

“Do you think turning into a demon is possible?” Josephine asked gently.

“I try not to think about it, but if the past few years has taught me anything it is that absolutely everything is possible.” Athena paused, “Cullen told me that the demon said that he broke her heart. I can’t help thinking that even if it was a lie, that hearing that still hurt him.”

“So, this is more about your doubt and frustration than his?” Ruffles hid her smile.

Athena chuckled, “I guess so. What did you need to tell me?”

“Nothing. I just figured you two needed some space. The Commander’s not sleeping is he?”

Athena closed her eyes, “No. He even told me that he would sleep when I was better.”

Josephine chuckled, “Sometimes they say the silliest things.”

“They? Are you blushing Josie?” Athena asked as Ruffles turned bright red, “Who is it? Does Leliana know?”

“It’s nothing serious, and what doesn’t she know?”

Athena laughed, and her ribs reminded her that laughing was a bad idea, “I still don’t know who it is…”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” Josephine blushed more.

"Try me…”

Ruffles closed her eyes, “It’s The Iron Bull.”

Athena gasped, “No!”

“Yes.”

“How? When? Details!” Athena got so excited that she ended up causing herself pain.

“When we were in the Arbor Wilds. Bull is really quite charming. When we came back to Skyhold, he actually defended me against one of the nobles,” Josephine was now blushing from the roots of her hair to her chin.

“Josie!” Athena exclaimed, “Soon you’re going to be planning your own wedding.”

“I don’t know about that… Do Qunari… Tal Vashoth even get married? Would Bull even want to?” Ruffles’ mind filled with questions.

“Are you telling me that the Inquisition’s Ambassador can’t find the answers to her questions?” Athena was amazed at how uncertain Josie was acting.

“It’s not serious! And my mother wouldn’t approve anyway!”

Athena laughed, winced in pain, and continued laughing.

**

When Curly came down the stairs he looked the worse for wear and very frustrated. He glanced at me, saw the freshly served food, and joined me in eating breakfast. I said quietly, “Healers make the worst patients.”

“You have no idea,” Cullen took a drink of his ale.

“Oh, I have an idea, I remember all too well what happened after we came back from the Arbor Wilds. It probably isn’t helping that this is your first meal in close to a day?” I asked, but it was more of a statement.

"She refuses to listen, and then she tells me I need to sleep," Cullen complained. 

I nodded in understanding. Curly continued, “The healer said that most of her bones were broken and that she had healed someone near death. The demon had a small hold on her because Athena used her magic where the demon resided. She’s in so much pain and won’t ask for help. I’m terrified to touch her because when she shifts she winces in pain. When I kissed her last night, she moaned in pain….And I’m the reason all this happened.”

"What do you mean?” I asked.

“Athena almost killed herself saving Selene and the baby, and all because this demon was after me.” Curly swore.

After a couple minutes of silence, I tried to reassure him, “Cullen, you didn’t cause the demon to come after you.”

“That’s the thing, Varric, I did. Before she became a demon, we briefly courted. We agreed to break it off right before I became a Templar,” Cullen paused, “or so I thought.”

“Shit,” I breathed. After a couple minutes of thinking, I said, “Wouldn’t being turned into a demon screw with one’s memory?”

“I don’t know. It’s possible… It’s also possible that she was lying.”

“I’d be willing to bet that the demon was lying. Have you told Athena any of what your thinking?” 

“Why burden her even more?” Cullen asked.

“That’s the funny thing about love, when you’re open and honest about how you’re feeling, it’s not a burden. It becomes very aggravating and burdensome when you try to protect the one you love from your thoughts and feelings,” I explained like the expert I am.

Curly looked at me for a long time, “When did you become an expert on love?”

“Through writing about it,” I quipped. Curly shook his head and we enjoyed the rest of our breakfast. As Curly got up to leave, I said, “Take a nap with Athena today, hold her. Also, talk to her.”

When Curly entered Athena’s quarters he heard both her and Ruffles laughing and he smiled. Her laughter was a thing of beauty and completely infectious. 

Ruffles asked upon seeing him, “Did you have breakfast, Commander?”

“I did. I’ve told you several times now that you don’t have to call me that in private,” Cullen reprimanded.

She shrugged, “I don’t think I can.”

“Josie, please, for my sake, do it?” Athena joined in.

“Why would it bother you?” Ruffles turned to look at her friend.

“Because when you call Cullen Commander in private, I worry that you’re going to call me Herald or Your Worship and I’m just Athena.”

“My friend, we spend far too much time together for that to happen,” Ruffles smiled at Duchess, “speaking of, has Leliana been by?”

“Dance lessons don’t count?” Athena asked. Curly blushed, and the mischievous twinkle was back in Duchess’s eyes, “And no, I haven’t seen her since we were an hour outside of Skyhold. I’m sure she wants to catch up with the queen.”

“Maybe…” Ruffles paused, “and I will do my best, Comman---Cullen.” She curtsied a little and left.

Athena chuckled a little, and tried to hide the pain she felt, “Only Josie would stick to formalities in private.”

Cullen nodded and sat beside her. He gently took hold of her hand, he, “I’m sorry for earlier. I don’t like seeing you in pain, and to think that I’m partly responsible for that…”

“Cullen, you are in no way responsible for my being in pain. You know better than anyone that demons lie. You didn’t force me to help Selene and the baby, I did that,” Athena looked away, “I never thought I would need to… use my magic that way again.”

“Did you think I was upset with you because you used your magic to save two lives?” Curly was surprised by her revelation.

“A little, yes. But, I’m more upset with myself… we should have taken a couple of minutes to at least find another person to go with us, and I should have done something to protect myself when I healed Selene or the baby. But, I never think of doing that because it takes away the effectiveness of healing someone…” Athena trailed off, wondering if she should confess her fear. When she saw that Cullen was waiting patiently for her to continue, she went ahead, “I was scared… That maybe you saw a little bit of Brigidh in me.”

“That thought never crossed my mind. Yes, you’re both mages, but the similarities end there,” he assured her softly.

“You didn’t kiss me this morning…” Athena trailed off.

“I didn’t want to add to your discomfort. Every move you made last night had you crying out in pain, and I’m pretty certain you passed out on the healer,” Cullen said.

Athena tried to fight a smile, it didn’t work, “Did they notice?”

“They noticed you weren’t screaming in pain and they healed the bones that were broken.”

“It’s not as piercing anymore. Even though it still feels like I got thrown from a horse. I’m sore, but it is getting better,” Athena paused and smiled at him “I’m too comfortable to move, but I really want to kiss you right now…”

“Then I guess I’ll just have to move closer…” Curly did as he said and gently kissed her.

When the kiss ended, Athena whispered, “I am sorry for earlier too… I took my frustration of being helpless out on you.”

“Let me help you.” He quietly requested.

“I love you,” Athena said softly.

“I love you, too, but that’s not an answer,” Cullen used his other hand to caress her cheek.

Athena chuckled softly, “I’ll try. Did you go see Alistair?”

“No, I had breakfast with Varric. The way I was feeling I wouldn’t have been good company for what they’ve been through,” Curly smiled at her.

“Poor Varric,” Athena teased.

“No, not poor Varric, his first words were to me “healers make the worst patients.” 

"He doesn't make the greatest patient either…” Athena griped.

“Oh?”

“On one of our trips to the Hinterlands he tripped, spraining both ankles. At first he refused to let me heal him, saying that “Curly would have his head.” We weren’t even a couple at the time. But he couldn’t walk, he refused Cassandra’s assistance in getting him back to camp, and Solas kept talking to him about dwarven healing implements. And he asked why Varric didn’t have any.

“Until that point I thought it was impossible for Varric to shout at someone, but he really laid in to Solas. Cassandra got impatient, put a sword to his ankles and said, “let the Herald heal you or I’ll make sure you can’t walk ever again.” While I was healing him he kept grumbling about how you were going to hurt him and that he didn’t need to be healed. Of course doing anything further that day was out of the question. He wasn’t happy about that either. It seemed like he had plans for when we got back to Haven,” Athena finished.

Cullen laughed ruefully, “Please don’t get any ideas from him.”

"I won’t. I promise.”

There was a knock on the door. Curly asked, “Expecting someone?”

Athena started to shake her head, but stopped when her neck tightened, “No.”

Cullen went to open the door, and Cassandra came in, “I heard the Inquisitor was awake.”

“Cassandra!” Was exclaimed from up the stairs.

"I still don't understand why you don't want me to call you Inquisitor,” Seeker came up the stairs.

“Because you’re my friend. Should I start calling you Divine?” Athena asked.

"Maker, no!”

“I wanted to be treated as human too,” Athena explained. 

“Fine,” Cassandra grumbled. Curly chuckled at them, “what’s so amusing Commander?”

“I’ve never seen two people have issue with titles like you do,” Cullen sat beside Athena.

"How many times have you asked Josie to not call you by your title?" Athena asked.

Curly blushed, “That’s different.”

“Daily dance lessons different?” Cassandra raised an eyebrow at him.

“How did you…” Cullen sighed and glanced at Athena, “I don’t want to know.”

“I haven’t told a soul.” Athena wondered why Cassandra was there, “Cassandra, if you’re here, where’s my father?”

“Leliana insisted that she be the one to go. Commander, the soldiers were able to tell a difference in your dancing,” Seeker said.

“I’ve never danced in front of them,” Curly grumbled, blushing.

“Soldiers or soldier, Cassandra?” Athena fought a smile.

"What do you mean?" Cassandra asked.

“Kissing Knight-Captain Rylen at one of the most visible points of Skyhold,” Athena teased.

“I did… I…” Seeker took several deep breaths, “who told you?”

Athena chuckled, “Dorian and Varric. I want details.”

"There aren't any details, it was just a kiss," Seeker blushed.

“I guess I’ll just have to get the details from Leliana,” Athena shrugged.

"At least you're getting warned," Curly griped. He was still miffed that Leliana and Ruffles had played matchmaker between him and Athena.

Athena gasped, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You didn’t know that Leliana and Josephine set up your first outing?” Cassandra was shocked.

“No!” Curly exclaimed.

“Oh you dear, sweet, man. I love you,” Athena smiled and kissed him, “and that was partially my fault…”

“How?” Cullen asked.

“They saw me watching you train and heard me say something about wanting some alone time with you… And…” Athena trailed off. She correctly thought he could guess the rest.

“They made it happen.” Cullen said. “How did you know?”

“I overheard Leliana and Josie gushing about how cute we were together.”

“I’m glad you’re feeling better, Athena,” Cassandra said as she left. 

After the door closed, Cullen kissed her, gently at first. But then passion got the best of him. Athena moaned, which made Curly pause, until she whispered “don’t stop,” and pulled his head down to kiss him. Passion got the best of them and they made love.

After they made love, Curly held her and whispered, “Did I hurt you?”

Athena shook her head and whispered, “no.”

“Are you still in pain?”

“A little. As much as I want to stay here, I really need to use the garderobe,” Athena said. Cullen released her and got up to help her up. 

“Such a romantic walk,” Athena quipped on their walk to the water closet, causing Cullen to chuckle.

After Athena was finished, Cullen suggested, “If you feel up to it, why don’t we have a romantic walk to the balcony?”

"I would like that,” Athena smiled at him and they made their way to the closest balcony.

Athena closed her eyes and breathed deeply of the fresh air the balcony afforded. Cullen watched her and thought that they could both use a vacation, “After you’re fully healed, what would you think of going to South Reach?”

“I think we should talk to Josie first, but I would love it,” Athena opened her eyes to look in to his brown ones.

“Mia will be ecstatic,” Cullen pulled Athena closer to him.

"I can't wait to meet them," she said and then promptly yawned, which caused Curly to yawn.

“I am under orders to take a nap with you today.”

“Oh really? I think Varric needs to add some more rules to that book of his,” Athena smiled as they walked to the bed.

“We'll have to help him," Cullen picked her up and laid her gently on the bed, kissing her.

“Hmmm... I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep with what you have in mind,” she seductively teased.

Cullen smiled wickedly at her and started kissing her everywhere, which of course led to more passionate awakenings.


	25. Chapter 25

The night before Athena and Curly left for South Reach, we all got together at the tavern to play Wicked Grace, and there was a great amount of teasing going on. I asked, “You two aren’t traveling alone, are you?”

“No, Varric, we’re not…” Athena sighed in frustration. I had been pestering her for days.

“He’s just worried about you two. Sometimes, Varric, you’re worse than a mother with a newborn baby with your worrying,” Sparkler said. 

“They’re good people that weird shit happens to, and they have well deserved plans for the future,” I replied.

Athena sighed again. It was an argument she had been hearing for at least a week, “Josie, deal?”

“My pleasure,” Ruffles started dealing the cards.

“Where’s Seeker?” I asked.

“She had a date,” Athena smiled.

“With who?” Sparkler thought he could guess, but knowing would be so much more fun.

“Things are progressing nicely for her and the Knight-Captain,” Athena answered. Which brought a chorus of awws from everyone surrounding the table, “It’s a good thing she’s not here after that.” Curly stood while Athena was talking and she looked up at him, “Where are you going?”

“To make sure everything’s ready for tomorrow,” Cullen looked very nervous.

“I have barely seen you for the past two weeks. I’ve had to deal with Varric’s constant questioning, more bodyguards than I had to deal with when the world was ending, and you have checked five times already since dinner. Sit,” Athena ordered and turned her attention to her cards.

“Athena!” Curly blushed but listened.

“You promised,” Athena smiled sweetly at him.

Curly groaned, “I’m going to regret this.”

“You know, Kadan, I wouldn’t mind you ordering me around like that,” Bull said to Ruffles. 

Josephine blushed a very becoming shade of red. And Athena came to her friend’s rescue, “What’s your bet, Josie?”

Ruffles smiled in relief, “Three silvers.”

“Why haven’t you two seen each other for the past two weeks?” Sparkler was surprised because Cullen had been available for their chess matches.

“Athena was exaggerating, we’ve seen each other,” Curly answered.

“Not as much as I would have liked to," Athena said softly.

Cullen kissed her, “And you have why we’re going away.”

“Isn’t Arthur going with you?” I asked.

"For a bit, and then he’s going on to Ostwick,” Athena placed her bet.

“What’s there?” Bull asked.

“My mother’s grave and he wants to get some things he left behind,” Athena replied quietly.

“Sorry I asked, Boss,” Bull said.

“It’s okay,” Athena smiled at him.

“So, Curly, how’s Athena doing at chess?” I quickly asked to change the conversation to a less depressing topic. It was their last night in Skyhold for a number of weeks, it shouldn’t be bittersweet.

“Varric!” Athena blushed.

“She’d be a lot better if she wouldn’t keep getting distracted,” Curly grinned and placed his bet.

“I’m going to go back to laying on your desk when you and Dorian play,” she said just loud enough for everyone to hear.

“There hasn’t been a repeat of that?” Ruffles asked.

“No, he lets her go upstairs now,” Sparkler grumbled, irritated by his consistent losing streak against Curly.

We laughed. After the laughter subsided, I said, “Duchess, you’re pretty good at distracting Curly yourself…”

“I am really trying to learn, and then he…” Athena looked at her fiance, “starts kissing me.”

Curly shrugged, not repentant at all, “I can’t resist.”

“So play naked,” was suggested from Tiny. 

“That would be scandalous!” Ruffles blushed, everyone else laughed.

“Somehow I don’t think that would work…” Athena said, and then she thought about it and smiled mischievously, “then again…”

“No! Maker, please don’t,” Cullen pleaded.

"Do it," Bull encouraged her.

“You ask me to forfeit all the time…” Athena said to Cullen.

“Wait, he kisses you, and then asks you to forfeit?” Sparkler gasped.

“Hours later, yes,” Athena smirked as Curly blushed.

“That’s cruel, Curly,” I joined in, shaking my head.

“She knocks over the chess pieces,” Cullen defended himself.

“I knock them over? I think I will follow Bull’s suggestion,” She teased back, getting everyone but her fiance to laugh. Curly was too busy turning red.

For the second round, Cullen told another story about his Templar days, this one involved a food fight between the new recruits. After the story finished I said, “Duchess, it’s your turn.”

Athena shook her head and blushed, “I’m not a story teller. I want to know how the romance between Bull and Josie started.”

“Athena!” Ruffles blushed.

“I didn’t think an Antivan could blush this much,” I quipped.

“She still hasn’t told you?” Curly was surprised that Duchess hadn’t gleaned the details of her friends’ romance yet.

"No, and with Leliana not talking to me,” Athena chuckled as Josephine’s blush got brighter.

“Nightingale’s not talking to you?” I found that incredibly odd.

“All she does is apologize and then walks away,” Athena said. “So, Josie, how’d this start?”

“I just kept telling her how beautiful and intelligent she is, and she kept blushing,” Bull answered for Ruffles.

The news was greeted to a chorus of awws. Curly quipped, “Finally, someone else they can embarrass.” Athena laughed.

We continued trading stories and teasing each other until Seeker came storming in exclaiming, “men!” We all chuckled, surprised, she looked over at us, “Oh, tonight is the last night before the Commander and Inquisitor leave.” 

Athena hung her head, “I give up.”

Cullen chuckled softly and reminded her, “You can call her Divine.”

Athena smiled and said to Cassandra, “What happened?”

“He wants to come with me!” Seeker exclaimed.

“Of course he does, he loves you,” Athena stated like it should be obvious.

“And I’ve already given him my permission to leave,” Cullen backed his love.

“But he can’t!” Cassandra threw her hands in the air, exasperated.

“Don't you love him?” Athena asked (the rest of us were too busy trying not to laugh.)

“Of course I do, but I’m going to be Divine. Divines aren’t married,” Seeker sat down heavily.

“So, change it, Cassandra,” Athena looked at her cards.

“I could do that, couldn’t I?” Cassandra responded softly, realization dawning on her.

Athena chuckled softly, “Yes, you could.”

“I hope you two have a good trip," Cassandra said and left. We all burst out laughing.

“And with that I think we should call it a night,” Cullen looked at the beauty sitting beside him.

“Why? Afraid you might lose your clothes again?” Athena teased him.

Curly coughed, “Yes, well...” He whispered in Athena’s ear, “I’d prefer to lose my clothing with you in private.”

Athena stood, holding on to Curly’s hand and quickly said, “goodnight.” As they walked to the door.

“You know we’re not going to see you for weeks, and just like that you’re leaving us?” I complained.

“Yes,” Athena winked at me.

“Apparently she wasn’t lying when she said that she’s barely seen the Commander for the last two weeks,” Sparkler quipped.

Curly groaned. Athena giggled, “It’s not my fault you’ve worked yourself to the bone for the past two weeks.”

“You could have said something,” Cullen complained.

“I did everything I could think of except lay naked on your desk!” Athena exclaimed, “next time that’s what I’ll do.”

"Athena!” Curly blushed as they left. After Athena’s last comment we couldn’t contain our laughter anymore, Curly’s blush had us almost falling off of our chairs. In fact, Bull fell off of his chair.

Once Curly and Duchess were away from prying ears, he asked, “Was all that really necessary?”

“We have to give them something to talk about while we’re away,” Athena chuckled.

Cullen shook his head at her, “What am I going to do with you?”

They stopped once they reached the battlements, Athena stood right in front of him and asked, “Love me?”

“Always,” Cullen whispered and kissed her.

As they approached Cullen’s quarters they saw Leliana pacing. Cullen murmured, “She’s normally not one to pace.”

“Leliana?” Athena was hesitant. She wasn’t certain why Leliana had been avoiding her, and she didn’t want to upset her friend further.

“I’m sorry,” Nightingale had guilt written all over her face.

"For what?” An apology was the last thing Athena expected.

“For not talking to you, for taking advantage of you…” Leliana trailed off.

“Taking advantage of me?”

“In the cave, with Selene,” Leliana said quietly.

“Leliana, even if you hadn’t asked, I would have healed her. You cannot take advantage of someone that’s already willing to do what you ask,” Athena explained.

“I still shouldn’t have put you at risk,” Leliana still had guilt lacing her voice.

“Why don’t we continue this inside?” Cullen suggested, noticing that Athena was shivering. The ladies followed him in to his office.

“I put myself at risk. I knew what my limits were and I exceeded them. This time, everyone lived. It was a victory, Leliana, leave it at that,” Athena argued quietly. 

Leliana looked away, having a crisis of conscience, “I chose an old friend over a new one, that’s not right.”

Athena rubbed her arms to bring warmth back in to them. Cullen noticed, “Are you still cold?”

Athena nodded, but talked to Leliana, “And in your position I would have done the same. I understand why you are thinking the way you are, but you are not Marjolaine. You may take advantage of situations, but I have yet to see you take advantage of a single person.”

“You are too kind, my lady,” Leliana said quietly, “I’ve taken enough of your time. I hope you both have a very pleasant trip.”

“Leliana,” Athena stopped her from leaving, “I meant what I said. I trust you and I consider you a friend.”

Leliana smiled and hugged her, “Thank you.”

“When we come back I want all the details on Bull and Josie,” Athena smiled.

“We have a deal,” Leliana said as she left.

While the ladies had been talking, Curly had gone upstairs to get a blanket for Athena. By the time he came down, Athena had already cleared off the desk (if that desk could talk,) cleared herself of clothing, and was in the process of laying down on the now infamous desk.

Cullen stared at her for a moment, recovered, and said, “I thought you were cold.”

“I am,” Athena smiled a come hither smile.

"Then I guess it’s up to me to warm you,” Cullen’s voice was low with desire as he undressed. 

As he mounted her and the desk, Athena whispered, “You always do.” Cullen kissed her passionately, desperately, almost as if it had actually been weeks since they made love….

**

The morning dawned bright and early, showing the promise of a beautiful day for the start of their trip. Athena was awakened by Cullen shaking and saying no. She closed her eyes as tears filled them, and whispered, “I love you. You are everything to me, and today starts where we can be just Cullen and Athena for a while.”

Cullen calmed down, her words a soothing balm on his tortured dreams, and awoke slowly. Once he was calm Athena tried to wipe away the couple tears that spilled over before Curly fully woke up. Cullen saw, “Athena?”

Athena half smiled at him, “I don’t like seeing you in pain.”

“I love you,” Cullen said softly, caressing her cheek.

“I love you, too.” Athena leaned in to his caress, “Should we get ready to go?”

Cullen smiled at her, “I guess we should.”

They got dressed and went down to the main gate where they met up with Athena’s father. Ruffles, Nightingale, Sparkler, and I had gathered to say goodbye. As Athena and Josephine were hugging, Duchess wondered, “No Bull?”

Ruffles blushed, “He’s… Sleeping.”

Athena laughed which prompted Leliana to smile and say, “Looks like I need to have a talk with with a former Qunari.”

“No!” Ruffles shouted. Which brought Curly over.

“Are you causing trouble?” He asked Athena.

“All I did was ask where Bull was.”

"The trouble is mine, Commander. I have to go talk to a certain Tal Vashoth. Have a good trip.” Leliana hugged Athena and left to wake up Bull.

“Leliana!” Josephine chased after her.

Athena and Curly laughed and they walked over to Sparkler and I. Arthur was trying to talk Dorian in to coming with him. “No, Uncle, someone has to stay here.” Dorian winked at Athena.

"Dorian?" Athena asked.

“Yes?” He said as he hugged her.

“No lighting Skyhold on fire,” Curly commanded.

Dorian mock sighed, “It will still be standing when you return. Have fun.”

Athena asked me, “Are you going to go home to Kirkwall?”

"I think I'll stick around for a while,” I winked at her and she hugged me…which had me blushing and Cullen laughing.

“Next time we play Wicked Grace, Curly, Athena won’t be coming to your rescue,” I warned.

“We’ll see,” Curly smirked. 

Athena who was already on her horse, looked down at us, “Varric, you’re always trying to get Cullen and I to blush, I think we deserved that one.”

“I’m a dwarf, I don’t blush,” I grumbled. Athena laughed, and as her laugh warms the heart of anyone within hearing distance, I couldn’t help but chuckle, “I can come along and keep him in line for you.”

“No, I will make sure you hear most of everything that happens at South Reach,” Athena said.

“And the way there and the way back… For the book’s sake,” I reminded her. 

Athena shook her head at me and then noticed formerly Knight-Captain Rylen mounting up, “Cullen?” Athena asked getting Curly’s attention.

“Yes?”

"I thought Rylen wasn’t part of the Inquisition anymore?” She asked.

“He’s not, he wants to take Cassandra somewhere,” Cullen got on his horse.

“Oh…” Athena paused, “Are they going the entire way with us?”

“No, they’ll be turning off about half way,” Cullen was distracted by making sure everything was in order.

"With at least half the soldiers that are currently coming with us?” She asked hopefully.

Cullen laughed, “More than half.”

“Thank the Maker,” Athena sighed in relief.

“Your not used to traveling with this many people?” Arthur asked as he mounted up.

“No, I mostly traveled with three other people,” Athena answered.

“Only three people?” Arthur was shocked.

“Yes. When I left Ostwick for Haven I travelled most of the way by myself. So, it was a major improvement,” Athena explained. 

Arthur closed his eyes, “I’m sorry.”

Athena smiled at him, “If you had known, I’m sure you would have been there."

“You are very forgiving, Athena,” Arthur still felt guilty.

“Yes, she is,” Cullen said and asked, “Ready?”

“Yes," Athena smiled at Curly.

“Let’s move!” Cullen shouted. And it seemed as though half of Skyhold went with them.

**

Athena’s father traveled with them until the third day and then he turned north to head to Ostwick, at Curly’s insistence he took some soldiers with him. Before Arthur left he pulled Athena aside, “After I go to Ostwick I’m going to go back to Tevinter.”

“Why?” Athena asked.

“Dorian isn’t the only one that wants to change his homeland,” Arthur smiled at her, “in fact, it was what I was trying to do when I met your mother.”

"Does Dorian know this about you?”

“It’s not something we’ve ever discussed,” he answered.

“You should, he’s always talking about going home. Will you be back for the wedding?” Athena tried not to show that she was worried, but it felt like she was losing her father and they had just met.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Arthur smiled at her.

Athena, at a loss for words, hugged him, which brought tears to his eyes. Cullen walked over and said quietly, “We need to go.”

Athena and Arthur released each other. Arthur paused long enough to say to Cullen, “Take care of her, she’s everything to me.”

Cullen nodded in understanding and took her hand, “You have my word.”

Athena watched Arthur leave with tears in her violet eyes. Cullen released Athena’s hand only to draw her in closer to him which she gratefully accepted and said with tears choking her voice, “I knew it would happen eventually… But I didn’t think it would be this hard.” 

Athena hid herself in the comfort and safety of Cullen’s arms and cried. Seeker noticed that something was wrong and started to walk over until she noticed Curly shaking his head.

When Athena was cried out, Cullen gently lifted her chin to look into her eyes and asked quietly, “Is he coming back for the wedding?”

She whispered, “Yes.” 

"Good. Did you want to wait to leave?” Cullen questioned.

Athena cleared her throat, “No, the faster we get to South Reach the faster the titles stop.”

"How are you so certain of that?” Curly helped Athena on to her horse.

“Mia promised me,” Athena smiled mischievously.

“She’s my sister,” Cullen teased.

“Then you should write to her more often,” She teased back.

Cassandra rode up to check on Athena, “I trust all is well?”

"I’m fine, thank you, Cassandra. But, shouldn’t I be checking on you, considering you’re going to be the next Divine?” Athena teased.

Seeker made a disgusted noise, “Is that for me calling you Inquisitor earlier?” 

Athena smiled in answer, “Where’s Rylen taking you?”

“He won’t tell me anything except that it’s a surprise,” Cassandra bared her frustration.

“And that works on you?” Athena was shocked. Cassandra usually wasn’t one for surprises.

“Maybe I should go talk to Rylen,” Cullen half joked.

“Sorry, love, you already proposed, and you have surprised me,” Athena smiled at him.

"I ask daily, but then he kisses me and….” Cassandra blushed.

“Hmm… Sounds familiar,” Athena raised an eyebrow at Cullen, who slowly smiled. Athena shook her head and said, “I think they have it in for us, Cassandra.”

"I do believe you are right,” Cassandra looked over her shoulder, “he looks lonely.”

Athena chuckled as Seeker fell back to ride with her lover. She looked over at Curly, which he noticed, “Yes?”

“You provide enough distraction without any help,” Athena griped, getting Cullen to laugh.

“It’s good to know I’m not the only one easily distracted,” He said softly.

The last night the four of them were together, Rylen proposed to Cassandra. Seeker’s answer was, “No… Yes…. I love you…. The clerics are going to hate this.”

Athena said softly, “To me that sounds like all the more reason,” and then louder so more than Curly could hear, “Congratulations.”

Cullen chuckled at Athena and offered his congratulations as well, “I think it’s time we turn in.”

Athena took Cullen’s hand and they went into their tent together, leaving the newly engaged couple kissing. Once inside he kissed her and whispered, “I’m glad your answer was a simple, “yes.””

“The only way my answer would have been any different would have been if you asked me right after we met,” Athena took off her clothes.

“I couldn’t, you were unconscious,” he teased.

“Ha ha,” Athena walked over to him with only her long hair covering her and kissed him.

Cullen groaned, “I had every intention of going to sleep…”

“I didn’t,” Athena whispered silkily.

“I see that,” he whispered, crushing her to him and kissing Athena while she gained access to his skin.

**

Cullen and Athena said their goodbyes to Seeker and Rylen with the majority of the soldiers going with the newly engaged couple. Athena breathed a sigh of relief as there were only about ten soldiers with them now. Cullen laughed, “Having a large force isn’t a bad thing.”

“Feeling like we’re an invading army is. That’s Cassandra’s problem now,” Athena smiled.

“We’re going to be taking less breaks now that there is less to move,” Cullen explained to her.

“I’m okay with that,” Athena said after she got on her horse. Cullen smiled at her as he got on his horse and gave the signal to move out. 

When they broke for camp, Athena overheard two of the soldiers talking as she was putting blankets in the tent she shared with Curly, the first one asked, “The lady that’s traveling with us, she’s gorgeous, do you know if she’s with anyone?”

The second soldier laughed at him, “That beautiful lady is the Inquisitor and she’s engaged to the Commander. You don’t stand a chance.”

“I was told that the Commander and that Tevinter mage were an item,” the first soldier said.

The second soldier wondered why the other person was spreading false gossip, “Who told you that?”

“Don’t they play chess together every day?” 

“So?” The second soldier asked.

“Isn’t that odd?” The first soldier asked.

“Do you play cards everyday with a specific person?” 

“I do,” the first soldier answered.

“What’s the difference?” The second soldier asked.

“Nothing. I guess I don’t like chess,” the first soldier said and then sighed dreamily, “It is a shame about the Inquisitor though.”

The second soldier laughed, “New recruits.”

Cullen came up behind her and said softly, “Hello, beautiful.”

Athena jumped and blushed. Cullen chuckled, “What were you doing?”

Athena sighed as she finished preparing their cots, “There were a couple soldiers having a conversation outside of our tent.”

“I told you it was impossible to get away from rumors when you surround yourself with soldiers,” Cullen chuckled.

Athena turned around and smiled, “One of them thought you were courting Dorian.”

Cullen shook his head, “I’m assuming the conversation started about you though.”

“How did you know?” Athena was shocked.

“Because that conversation is always started by a new recruit. I even had one come up to me and ask about you, thinking I was another soldier.” Cullen pulled her close to him.

Athena shook her head, “I think I prefer teasing to gossip.”

“We do that, too,” Cullen smiled and kissed her.

“Commander,” one of the soldiers came in to the tent as they were kissing, “Sorry… Um… We’re ready to eat.” And he ducked back out of the tent.

Cullen chuckled, "I'd be willing to bet that was the new recruit you over heard.”

“Aww, he was told about us,” Athena felt sorry the recruit.

“Seeing is believing,” Cullen said softly and caressed her cheek, “Let’s go eat.”

They walked out of the tent holding hands and they were greeted with a chorus of “Commander! Inquisitor!” 

Athena hid behind Cullen’s shoulder, blushing. He pulled her forward, put an arm around her shoulders, and whispered in her ear, “No hiding tonight.”

One of the soldiers was telling the infatuated new recruit about how the Inquisitor once found a little girl that was separated from her family and that the Inquisitor didn’t leave the girl’s side until her family was found. Athena started blushing again.

“Johan, you’re not supposed to make the kid fall more in love with her. I doubt the Commander wants the new recruits beating down her door,” Knight-captain Darius said.

"I can’t help it, I only have good stories,” Johan said.

“I only saw her lose her temper once, and it was because someone decided it was a good idea to hit a horse with a whip… She actually healed the horse’s wounds,” another soldier remarked.

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “This is embarrassing.”

“I think we’ve talked enough about the Inquisitor tonight,” Knight-Captain Darius noticed Duchess’s red cheeks and turned his attention to Cullen, “What are the plans once we reach South Reach?”

“Everyone here has family and friends there?” Cullen asked. He was greeted with a chorus of “ayes”, “Then enjoy being home, we’ll be there for a few weeks.”

"I have to say, we're not used to having leave like this. It's a nice change," Darius commented.

“When the war started, I never thought I’d see my parents again,” Johan said, followed by a bunch of quiet “ayes”.

“Who will be everyone be visiting?” Cullen questioned.

“I get to see my parents again,” Johan said.

“I had left a sweetheart behind… I wonder if he’s still available,” Another said.

And so it went until Knight-Captain Darius spoke, “I get to see my daughter.”

“I didn’t know you had a daughter,” Cullen remarked after taking a drink of his ale.

“Her mom and I split right after she was born and I had lost track of them until recently,” Darius said looking at his flagon.

“What happened?” Athena asked quietly.

"My daughter’s mother didn't like that I was a Templar, and when we split, they disappeared. My brother had to track her down and he found them in South Reach. It’s been several years,” Darius answered quietly.

Athena’s eyes filled with sympathy, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I finally get to see her again, and we’ve written to each other,” Darius smiled at her.

Two of the soldiers had gone off to play cards after dinner, all of a sudden one of those soldiers said, “You can’t be serious! Seeker Cassandra is going to be the next Divine! Divines don’t get married!”

“When I was coming back from my rounds, I saw them. Commander Cullen and the Inquisitor were sitting right there. If you don’t believe me, ask them,” the other soldier said.

Curly and Duchess started chuckling. Darius heard and raised an eyebrow, “True?”

Cullen nodded, “I was actually surprised Rylen didn’t wait until they reached where they were going. He had quite the day planned.”

“He did?” Athena wondered how Cullen knew all of this, but she was more curious about the details. (She’s still a sap for romance stories.)

“He wanted to propose in front of his parents, among other things,” Cullen answered.

“I’m not sure how much Cassandra would have liked that…” Athena imagined Rylen having a fight on his hands with that.

Cullen laughed, “Probably why we were the audience instead.”

Darius stood up, as the two card players were still arguing, “Would you like to do the honors, Commander?”

“Go right ahead, Knight-Captain,” Cullen gave his permission, knowing what his second intended.

Athena asked, “Do what?” 

“Keep them from fighting,” Cullen answered.

“Over gossip?” She was dismayed that people would come to blows over half truths and rumors.

Cullen listened for a moment, “Sounds like they’ve moved on to accusing each other of cheating at the game they were playing.”

Athena shook her head, “Maybe that’s why I’m not any good at chess or really any other game.”

“Oh, I seem to remember you getting quite good at Wicked Grace,” Curly smiled at her.

“I had a very specific reason for wanting to learn Wicked Grace,” Athena teased.

Cullen shook his head, “The next time we play chess, we’re playing for stakes.”

“What kind of stakes?” Athena asked with a seductive light in her eyes and smile.

“You’ll find out,” Cullen kissed her. Which led to the soldiers around them applauding, Athena blushed.

"Told you her and the Commander were together, Timson,” Johan said to the new recruit.

“You made that clear when you told me to let them know dinner was ready,” Timson groused.

Cullen chuckled as he overheard the brief conversation and pulled away from Athena, “Dawn’s going to come early and now that we’re traveling lighter, we could reach South Reach by nightfall. Knight-Captain Darius, are you taking the first watch?”

“I am, we’ll figure out the rest of the watches. Have a good night Commander and Inquisitor,” Darius said.

Cullen reminded him, “I can take the second watch if needed.”

“Hopefully it won’t be necessary, Commander.”

Cullen wished the soldiers a good night and followed Athena in to their tent. Athena sat down on one of the cots, “Have you been sleeping?”

“Yes, why are you asking?” Cullen undressed.

“You offered to take the second watch…” Athena trailed off, doing the same.

“Besides Darius, the men with us are all relatively new and they usually fall asleep during the second watch,” Cullen explained.

“And you don’t,” Athena guessed. 

Cullen chuckled and shook his head, “You were quiet tonight…”

“I usually am around people I don’t know and this is a very different way of traveling than what I’m used to.”

“Different?” Cullen wrapped a blanket around Athena and sat beside her.

“More organized… There was no pestering, or Varric yelling at me for disappearing in to my tent,” Athena chuckled.

“Why would he yell at you?” Cullen got under the blanket too.

"His exact words were, "I like that you read. I love that you’re reading my books, however we can’t get to know you if you have your nose in a book.” So, after the first week I’d wait until he fell asleep to read. We also didn’t have official overnight watches…unless Cassandra was along,” Athena explained.

“That’s not something I needed to know,” Curly closed his eyes and shook his head. Athena chuckled at him. In response to her laughter, he kissed her and Athena threw her arms around Cullen’s neck and refused to let go. It’s a good thing they were already naked.

After they made love Curly asked, “Did you bring a book along for this trip?” 

“Yes,” Athena blushed, “In case I couldn’t sleep.”

“It’s not…” Cullen worried that it was him keeping her up.

Athena smiled at him, “There are times where I can’t get to sleep or I wake up and can’t fall back asleep. When I was younger it happened so frequently that I got into the habit of reading a book until I was tired…or I fell asleep reading.”

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief and kissed her, “Time for us to get some sleep.”

Athena assumed her favorite position of laying her head on Cullen’s chest to fall asleep. Curly on the other hand, started having dreams almost immediately and it was a blessing when Darius called softly, “Commander.”

Cullen gently removed himself from Athena so as not to disturb her. He quickly got dressed and went outside to meet Darius, “The second watch couldn’t wake up?”

Darius chuckled and shook his head, “When I first started training to be a soldier, if I couldn’t wake up for my duties, I got doused with water. At times, I think these recruits need that.”

Cullen chuckled with him, “Which parent were you called tonight?”

“Mother,” Darius replied, “will you need company?”

“No, I’ll be fine. Go get some rest,” Cullen answered.

About an hour later Athena came out to sit beside him. He asked gently, “Couldn’t sleep?”

Athena blushed and whispered, “I fell off the cot.”

Cullen chuckled and put his arm around her, “You had to sleep on something when I wasn’t around.”

“Blankets and the ground,” Athena reached up to hold his hand.

“Why?” 

“Because every time I tried to put a cot together it would either break or I’d get caught in it,” Athena blushed a very becoming shade of pink.

Cullen chuckled softly, “Oh, Athena, I love you.”

“Because I can’t put a cot together?” She was bewildered that that was his response.

He outright laughed, “Yes. I’m sure anyone you were traveling with would have helped you.”

“That would have ended in an endless amount of teasing that I didn’t need,” Athena looked up at the stars and happened to see one shooting by, “What happens on a night watch?”

“Hopefully nothing,” Cullen smiled at her.

“So… You just sit here?” 

“Pretty much… Watch, listen, and wait,” Cullen felt Athena snuggle into him. He knew that she was exhausted, “Athena, you don’t have to wait up with me.”

“I want to… And I really don’t want to see the mess I made,” Athena said. Curly chuckled and kissed her on the top of her head.  
They sat quietly for a while and Athena asked, “Do you really think we could be at South Reach tomorrow night?”

“So long as everything goes as planned, yes. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious,” Athena tried to hide how nervous she was feeling.

Curly stood and held out a hand for her, “Let’s go for a walk.” Athena took his hand and stood. He briefly kissed her, “I understand if you’re nervous.”

“Is it that obvious?” Athena blushed.

“Yes,” Cullen smiled at her as they started walking the outskirts of the camp.

“How long has it been since you’ve seen them?”

“I haven’t seen them since before the blight,” He said quietly.

“Thirteen years have gone by?” Athena was stunned. The Templars in her Circle were always allowed leave to see family.

“Yes.”

"Are you nervous?" She asked.

Cullen thought for a while, “I shouldn’t be, but, yes, a little. I’m not the same person I was then…”

“Do you think they’re the same?” Athena moved to walk backward in front of Curly so she could look at him.

“You’re going to trip,” he warned. “No, I don’t think they’re the same, but they weren’t tortured... I should have stayed in touch more.”

“You’re staying in touch now, that has to count for something,” Athena reminded him.

“And that’s mostly because of you,” Cullen smiled at her, and then she tripped over a tent stake, “I warned you.”

“Oh, hush,” Athena kissed him.

“I should have sent you back to bed,” Cullen murmured softly.

“Why?”

“Because right now being on watch is the last thing I want to do,” he pulled Athena close and kissed her for far longer than was needed to get his point across. 

As the kiss ended they heard a soft chuckle behind them, “Next time, I’m dousing Timson with water.”

Athena blushed and Cullen chuckled, “Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping, Darius?”

“I slept last night,” Darius quipped.

Cullen shook his head at him, “Sometimes I wonder how you make it through the day.”

“How long have you two known each other?” Athena asked.

“We met at Kirkwall,” Cullen answered as the three of them started walking again.

“I was so far down in the ranks that I didn’t think the Commander knew I existed until he asked me to help repair all that Knight-Commander Meredith tore asunder,” Darius responded.

“If you hadn’t caused so much trouble in your early years…” Cullen reprimanded.

“Ah, but I enjoyed doing it,” Darius smiled in fond remembrance.

“Trouble?” Athena asked as they finished the walk and sat back down.

“Some of the knight-commanders and I had different ideas on what protect and serve meant,” Darius was unrepentant.

“Darius was quite infamous when I became a Templar,” Cullen explained.

“How were you allowed to remain a Templar?” Athena questioned.

“I had calmed down quite a bit by the time the fifth blight happened… And I had stopped courting mages,” Darius was quite serious.

Curly laughed, “No, you didn’t.”

Darius chuckled, “Okay, I stopped being loud about it.”

“Through his actions and leadership he saved a lot of lives at Kirkwall. Despite his opinions and rubbing it in everyone’s face that he was always courting someone,” Cullen put an arm around Athena.

“I thought Templars weren’t allowed to date mages?” Athena asked.

“They’re not supposed to. Most of the knight-commanders would look the other way, if the relationship remained quiet,” Cullen responded.

“Just one of many things I disagreed with them on. I never saw mages as any thing other than people, and I believed they deserved to be treated as such. Not many agreed with me. And as for you, Commander, you could have had anyone you wanted had you glanced their way,” Darius said.

Cullen shrugged and looked at Athena, “I think that worked out for the best.”

Darius chuckled, “It certainly did.”

Athena blushed and rubbed her arms. Cullen noticed, “Cold?” 

“A little. I think I’m going to go find a blanket,” Athena stood and walked in to her and Curly’s tent.

The two men watched her disappear. Darius remarked quietly, “The Inquisitor seemed uneasy tonight.”

“She’s not used to traveling with this large of a group.”

“How did she get from Ostwick to Haven?” Darius asked.

“By herself,” Curly answered.

“Maker,” Darius breathed. Seeing Athena come back he quickly changed the subject, “Why didn’t you court anyone at Kirkwall?”

“Isn’t it several years too late for this kind of questioning?” Cullen chuckled at the blatant change of subject. Athena sat beside him wrapping herself in her blanket.

“Not at all. The Inquisitor isn’t the only one I’m approached with about being single. For a time, I had let them know that I was available, but they only have eyes for you. They cry when I tell them that your taken.”

Cullen groaned, “Not again.”

“Again?” Darius asked, confused.

Athena laughed, “Halamshiral all over again.”

"This is a story I haven’t heard,” Darius said, a grin beginning to take form.

"When we were at the Winter Palace..." Athena paused to look at Cullen, “He had several admirers. I noticed…”

“And you weren’t jealous?” Darius stopped Duchess with his question.

“No, she found my misery hilarious,” Curly groused.

Athena laughed, “At least when you asked me to dance I didn’t turn you down.”

“You turned her down?!” Darius was incredulous.

“By accident and I made up for it,” Cullen grumbled.

"The only reason I found it funny was because I knew you cared for me. Otherwise, there may have been more to talk about than Duchess Florianne’s treachery,” Athena turned her face up to kiss him.

"That, I would have liked to see. I can't believe you turned the Inquisitor down, even if it was an accident,” Darius chuckled.

“I was being asked to dance more times than I could count…” he coughed, “I was trying to make sure you were safe,” Curly looked at Athena, “and keep a look out for an assassin…”

Athena chuckled and yawned, lifting the hand she was holding so she could snuggle into Curly’s side, “The only one allowed to pinch your bottom at our wedding is me.”

Darius laughed so hard, he almost fell over, “They didn’t!”

Curly blushed bright red and said to Athena, “Now that you’ve thoroughly embarrassed me, why don’t you go back to bed?”

“I think we broke the cot earlier,” Athena murmured half asleep.

“Those cots really aren’t built for more than sleeping on,” Darius chuckled.

“Shut up, Darius,” Cullen grumbled, blushing.

“And to think this is going to be the rest of your life,” Darius smiled at him.

Cullen looked down at a now sleeping Athena, and said softly, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“I’m happy for you, Commander, it’s been a long time coming.” Darius said quietly, “Before you take her in you should probably see what damage has been done. She can lay on the ground for a couple minutes.”

Cullen gently laid Athena down and made sure the blanket covered her before following Darius’ advice. Darius stayed and watched over Athena. A couple minutes later Curly came out carrying pieces of broken cot. Darius noticed, “If you two are going to be traveling a lot you may want to use a stronger type of wood.”

“Ha ha,” Cullen picked Athena up, “The first order of business is teaching her how to set one up so it doesn’t collapse on her.”

“How…” Darius paused, “You know, it can keep til morning. Don’t worry about the watch, Commander, I’m not able to sleep anyway.”

“It’s only an hour until the third watch, at least try,” Cullen said before he disappeared into the tent with Athena.

**

Curly and Athena got up with the dawn… Well… Kind of… Cullen groaned, “How did you do this practically every night?”

Athena chuckled, “I was able to double up the blankets, so it was a bit softer… You’re telling me that you’ve never slept on the ground before?”

“Not since I was a kid,” He sat up, rubbing his neck.

Athena smiled, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen stood and stretched, “I think Darius was right… We need stronger cots.” Athena laughed… Cullen got on his knees in front of her and said, “Find that funny, do you?”

Instead of answering, she reached out for him and pulled Curly on top of her and started kissing him. In between the kisses she whispered, “At least we aren’t in danger of breaking anything now.”

Unfortunately, they didn’t get to finish what they started as the call of “Commander” was heard and then, “You’re not going to go in are you?”

The first voice asked, “Why not?”

A third voice ordered, “Wait until the Commander comes out.”

Cullen dropped his forehead to Athena’s shoulder and sighed, “This will have to be continued later.” She smiled at him, understanding. Curly called, “I’ll be right out.”

As he was leaving the tent he looked at Athena who hadn’t moved, except she was stretching and the blanket was being pulled taut to show off her curves. Curly left the tent even more impatient to get back to Athena. He looked at the person who originally called to him. “Breakfast is ready.”

“Thank you,” Cullen said and went back in to the tent to see Athena sitting up and starting to put on clothes. He took her shirt from her, “That can wait.”

Athena smiled at him and as Curly was undressing they heard, “I swear, Timson, some days I think you have a death wish.” Our lovers chuckled softly and proceeded to make love without any interruptions.

Everyone ate breakfast quickly and quietly, anxious to get to their destination. They broke camp and rode hard until lunch time. When they broke for lunch Athena noticed that Cullen was pale and eating like her (which means eating little to nothing.) As the rest of the group mounted up, Athena hung back so she could talk to Cullen. She got right to the point, “What’s wrong?”

Cullen kissed her gently, “Just a headache.”

“We can stop until you feel better,” Athena said, worried for him.

“I won’t hold everyone else back.” 

“You don’t have to. I said we could stop,” Athena said softly.

“I won’t leave you unprotected,” Cullen said with absolute certainty.

“I’m certain I can protect the both of us,” She argued.

“You don’t have to, it’s just a headache.”

“How often do your headaches go away or remain just headaches?” She knew this had to do with lyrium withdrawal. 

Cullen didn't answer as Darius rode up, “All you have to give is the word, Commander.”

“I’m sorry Knight-Captain Darius but I’m feeling a little unwell. Please tell the men to ride ahead, and I’ll catch up when I’m able,” Athena answered for Curly. 

Darius looked at Cullen who nodded in agreement with Athena… He could already feel the pain starting. Darius rode off to tell the men that they could ride ahead. As soon as Darius turned around Cullen closed his eyes and stumbled a bit. Athena rushed over to him from the spot where she was talking to Darius and helped him sit down. She teased quietly, “No more sleeping on the ground for you.”

Cullen smiled weakly at her teasing, and whispered, “You shouldn’t have done that.”

“Done what?” Athena asked, slightly above a whisper.

“Said that you were ill,” he cupped her cheek and caressed it.

"Cullen, I love you, I’m not out fighting evil everyday anymore…” she paused and gently teased, “I have to protect someone. It might as well be the man I love.”

Darius came back and gently coughed, interrupting them, “The tent and cots have been set up. Do you need any assistance, my lady?”

“No, we’ll be fine. Go see your daughter,” Athena ordered quietly.

“And leave the Commander of the Inquisition and the Inquisitor out here alone? I thank you for thinking of me, but I wouldn’t be a father worthy of her if I left you two unprotected.”

“Thank you, Knight-Captain,” Athena tried not to wince as Cullen was squeezing her hand extra hard to not show that he was in pain.

“Commander, we’re going to help you to your tent,” Darius said, going to the opposite side of where Athena was sitting, and helped Cullen to his feet.

“How did you know?” Athena asked.

“I’ve seen lyrium withdrawal before, and there have been rumors.”

"Of course there have," Cullen whispered, walking slowly with their assistance.

“The Inquisitor isn’t the only one that cares about you, Commander,” Darius chuckled softly. They walked the rest of the way to the tent in silence and got Curly at least sitting on a cot before Darius teased, “Don’t break the cot this time, Commander.”

“Ha ha,” Cullen said quietly while Athena blushed. After Darius left the tent Cullen informed his love, “We won’t get to South Reach until tomorrow now.”

“Then we don’t get there until tomorrow,” Athena said softly, “You should be laying down.”

“I will in a minute,” he reached over and lightly kissed her, “I love you.”

Athena smiled at him, “I love you, too. Now, rest.”

Cullen did as he was told and Athena held his hand until he fell asleep and then she went out to talk to Darius, “Thank you.”

“Inquisitor?” Darius was surprised to see her. He thought he’d be manning the fire alone.

“Please call me Athena? You didn’t have to stay.”

“I know, but I also know how stubborn he can be. How long has he gone without lyrium?” Darius thought he could guess, but it was better to have a straight answer.

“He stopped taking it once he joined the Inquisition,” Athena replied.

"He won't be in this kind of pain forever,” Darius said quietly as she sat beside him, “Can’t you take it away?”

"I could, but it would only be for the day…not that he would let me anyway,” Athena smiled.

“Like I said, stubborn,” Darius got her to chuckle, “He’s a changed man since being with you and I thank you for that.”

"What do you mean?" 

“He smiles. At Kirkwall he never did. He never really talked to anyone unless it was about work. He’s still quiet, but he at least teases back now.”

"And you think I had something to do with that?" Athena was confused.

“I think you had everything to do with it. Nothing heals old wounds like true love…” Darius paused, “If I wasn’t in love with someone already, I’d be asking if you have a sister or a brother.”

Athena laughed, “I’m sorry, I’m an only child. Would you be willing to share whom you’re in love with?”

“Thank the Maker,” Cullen said quietly, joining them.

“Aren’t you supposed to be resting?” Darius admonished his commanding officer.

Curly sat down beside Athena and kissed her before answering, “I’m feeling better. And I wouldn’t mind hearing about who you’re courting now.”

“He’s a mage, and that’s all I’m going to say about it.” Darius blushed.

“Is your daughter adopted?” Athena asked.

“No. I’ll court any gender if there’s a mutual attraction,” Darius answered. 

“I think the only one currently not courting anyone is Leliana,” Curly thought out loud.

“She’s going to kill you. I don’t want any part of this…” Athena laughed.

“No worse than what she did to me,” Cullen griped.

“Not interested in playing matchmaker, Inq-Athena?” Darius asked.

“Sweet Andraste! No, I leave the matchmaking to the professionals.”

“And who might that be?” Darius asked.

“Leliana and your cousin,” Curly looked at Athena.

“Cullen!”

“It’s true! For months all Dorian and Varric did was talk about you to me, like I couldn’t see how amazing you were...” He paused, “are. Dorian still does it. And Leliana would constantly pester me about getting distracted.”

Athena laughed, “Are you sure they’re not trying to make you lose at chess?” And then softer, “It’s good to know I wasn’t the only one getting talked to.”

“They talked about me incessantly?” Cullen was shocked.

“Well, no, not exactly… It was more that I shouldn’t be so shy around you, that I should flirt with you more. Dorian even offered to give me lessons. One night it was suggested that I should show up in front of you with very little on…” Athena blushed.

"Commander, why would you have issue with listening to the virtues of this beautiful young lady?” Darius wanted to guide the conversation away from talk of Dorian on the off chance that our lover’s would notice the grin when ever he heard Sparkler mentioned.

“Because I was trying to work… And it was… Distracting,” Cullen blushed.

Darius shook his head at Curly, “And did you listen to their suggestions, Athena?”

Athena chuckled softly, “If I had, Leliana and Josephine wouldn’t have had to use subterfuge to get us to go on a date. In my defense though… I had never been courted before.”

“How, in all that is holy, did you manage that?” Darius was astounded.

“No one ever asked,” Athena said softly.

Darius closed his eyes and begged, "Please tell me you asked, Commander.”

“It may have been a set up, but yes, I asked,” Cullen groused.

“Let’s start from the beginning…” Darius pleaded.

"Leliana and Josephine had set up a picnic for us. Leliana gave me a note saying that there was something Cullen should investigate…” Athena trailed off.

“And I asked Athena to go with me, not knowing there was a plot against me…” Cullen paused and said quietly, looking at Athena, “I would have asked eventually.”

Athena kissed him and chuckled, “Or we would have ended up getting locked in a room and not let out until we were a couple.”

Darius shook his head, “You two were meant for each other. When we get back to Skyhold, I want to meet this cousin of yours, Athena.”

“I’ll introduce you, but he’s taken,” she said.

“With who?” Darius wondered if their relationship wasn’t as serious as he thought.

“He won’t tell me.” Athena shrugged.

“By the way, Dorian keeps pestering me about the wedding and Leliana needs to stop spying on me,” Curly griped.

“Why would he be pestering you about our wedding? She spies on me too,” Athena said.

“He wants to help plan it,” Cullen answered, Athena paled, which had both men chuckling.

“Has Dorian said why he won’t tell you?” Darius asked.

“I haven’t really asked. He’ll tell me eventually," Athena stood.

“Where are you going?” Cullen was surprised that she was leaving.

“I‘m assuming that we aren’t going to travel any further today?” Athena waited for Curly’s nod, “so I am going to go straighten up the tent, and find something to eat.”

“Are you hungry?” Curly asked.

“A little,” Athena was already dreading where this was going.

“Are you feeling okay?” 

“I feel fine. I do occasionally get hungry,” Athena walked away from them.

“Varric and Dorian should be here for this.” Curly said loud enough for Duchess to hear.

“Andraste preserve me,” was heard from the tent.

Darius looked at Curly, confused. After Cullen finished laughing, he said, “She barely eats and quite often needs to be reminded. So for her to be actively looking for food is rare.”

Darius shook his mostly grey head in response. Laughter in his green eyes.

Athena returned with everything needed to make an herbal soup. Both of the men stared as she worked. Darius was the first to speak, “Somehow, us sitting here feels wrong.”

“I agree, but I’m not sure what to do,” Cullen responded. 

Athena chuckled, “One of you can go find bowls.”

“I will!” Darius hopped up from where he was sitting and ran to do as Athena asked.

Cullen came to stand beside her, and asked softly, “Is there anything I can do?”

Athena turned away from the pot and stood on tiptoe to kiss him, “Keep me company?”

“Gladly,” He responded, “are these things something you usually bring along on trips?”

“Yes, it’s kind of a little survival kit.”

“Do I want to know where you learned to be so prepared?”

“It was part of the healer training at Ostwick,” Athena said, “where’s Darius?”

“Why?” Cullen was distracted by the lovely woman in front of him.

“Because it’s ready to eat.”

“Here are the bowls,” Darius produced them with a flourish, “I couldn’t find any spoons though.”

Athena shook her head, “We don’t need spoons.”

It took Darius a second to catch on, “That’s not very elegant.”

“Then sip it carefully,” Athena teased, spooning the soup in to the bowls.

Athena, (of course) was the first one done and started to clean things. Cullen stopped her by saying, “I think Darius and I can clean up.” Duchess smiled at him and sat back down.

As they finished cleaning, it started to rain. They all ran into the nearest tent (which happened to be our lovers’ tent,) and started laughing. Darius quipped, “And I get to go back out there.”

Cullen put a blanket around Athena’s shoulders which she gratefully accepted, and they sat down beside each other. Darius, who was still standing, said, “Thank you for dinner, Athena. I’m going to let you two have some privacy.” He slightly bowed and left. 

Cullen looked down at her, “Is there anything you can’t do?”

“Put together a cot for one,” Athena teased herself.

“We’re going to have to work on that,” Cullen responded quietly and kissed her.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

“If you hadn’t stopped us when you did I probably would have fell off my horse. Thank you,” Cullen blushed.

Athena yawned, “You’re welcome.”

“Let’s get some rest,” Cullen said softly, kissing her. Athena was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

**

Athena woke in the middle of the night and could not get back to sleep. She didn’t want to wake Curly so instead of searching for her book she went outside to look at the stars. Inevitably she started thinking back on the day and she couldn’t hold the tears back. Athena wasn’t really upset with anyone, she just hated seeing Cullen in so much pain, and she was frustrated with herself for not knowing how to help him. She knew she could use magic to take away the pain, but it would be temporary, and even though Cullen had reassured her that her being a mage doesn’t worry him, Athena was hesitant to mention magic as a potential solution. Once her tears were spent she resolved herself to spend some time in Skyhold’s library to see if there was anything on lyrium withdrawal. 

Cullen woke up before dawn and noticed Athena wasn’t there. He got dressed quickly and went searching for her. He didn’t have to search far, as he found her wrapped in a blanket, laying on the ground in front of their tent. Cullen sighed, picked her up, and carried her back in to the tent. Almost as soon as her body touched the cot she was awake. She saw Cullen sitting across from her and she blushed. Cullen asked, exasperated, “What do you have against sleeping on cots?”

Athena chuckled and blushed more, “Nothing. I woke up in the middle of the night and I couldn’t get back to sleep,” she paused, “I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“I would rather have you disturb my sleep than finding the woman I’m going to marry sleeping on the ground, exposed,” Cullen chastised.

“I’m sorry,” Athena winced at the reprimand because she knew better and shifted to sitting.

“Was there a reason you couldn’t sleep?” 

"Not originally,” Athena hedged.

“That’s not an answer,” Cullen took her hands in his. Hers were ice cold.

“There wasn’t a reason for me waking up… I just did. I was wide awake, so instead of searching in the darkness for a book and to avoid waking you up, I went outside to look at the stars.” Athena explained without mentioning the crying part. (Love would be so much easier if we would stop letting pride and fear get in the way.)

“Why were you crying?” Cullen asked quietly.

“How…?” Athena started.  
In answer, Cullen pulled out a piece of his armor so Athena could look at herself. Funny thing about dirt, it sticks to wet areas, and down Athena’s cheeks were two streaks of dirt, resembling streaks of tears. Her blushing made the streaks all the more prominent. She briefly looked away from him, and said barely above a whisper, “Seeing you in pain and knowing there was nothing I could do to help, got the best of me.”

“Athena…” Curly moved to sit beside her.

“I love you, Cullen, and I could take away the pain when it shows up if you would let me,” Athena said in a rush.

“Would it hurt you?” He questioned, worried for her.

“It hasn’t when I’ve done it to others.”

“Others?” 

“Sometimes a Templar would get injured and the healers wouldn’t allow them to take lyrium until their injuries healed. Because of my abilities, they would come to me when the pain became too great and I would take it from them. Sometimes on a daily basis. When they were allowed to have lyrium again they took it, and the addiction became worse,” Athena answered.

Cullen sighed, “For an instant I thought…”

“That I would ask you to take lyrium again?” Athena asked, prompting him to look away and nod. "Cullen,” she waited until he looked at her, “I would never ask that of you. I lived in a circle. Because of my isolation from almost everyone it was a lot easier for me to see what the effects of using it were... And I can’t,” Athena closed her violet eyes against the sting of tears, “watch you go through that… Or worse.”

When she opened them again they were filled to almost overflowing. Cullen choked back his own tears and crushed her to him, whispering, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena kissed him, “when we get back to Skyhold, I want to see if there is a way other than magic to make the withdrawal less painful.”

“Would it bother you if we continued this conversation at another time? We really need to get going,” Cullen said softly.

“So long as it is continued."

“You have my word,” Cullen sealed the promise with a kiss.


	26. Chapter 26

Outside of South Reach our lovers said goodbye to Darius and continued on to Mia’s house without looking around the quaint town. As they walked up to the door, Curly asked, “Ready?”

Athena took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, “Yes. You?”

Cullen half teased, “Let’s go back to Skyhold.” Standing in front of Mia’s wooden door, the nervousness came back.

Athena chuckled, kissed him, and whispered, “No.”

Before Curly could knock on the door a lady opened it. She looked like she could have been Cullen’s twin except that her blonde hair was mostly gray. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at her brother, “I can’t believe you’re actually here.”

Athena took hold of Cullen’s hand to offer support. For once she got to startle him. Curly looked down at their entwined hands and smiled. He turned his attention back to his sister and said quietly, “Hello, Mia. I’m sorry it’s been so long. I would like to introduce you to Inquisitor Athena Trevelyan.”

“You’re here now, that’s all that matters. Come inside,” Mia opened the door wide for them. Before they got in the door she hugged Cullen and then Athena who got a hastily whispered, “Thank you.”

“Rosalie and Branson will be visiting tomorrow. We thought you would like to rest before everyone came to visit,” Mia said while they were walking up the stairs to show them their rooms.

“Thank you,” Athena said.

“You’re very welcome,” Mia smiled at her, “How long are you two able to stay?”

Athena waited for Curly to respond. When he didn’t, she answered for him, “We’re hoping to be able to stay for a few weeks. Right, Cullen?” 

“Yes?” Athena had broken through where ever he had gone. Curly realized they were waiting for an answer, “Yes,” there’s that blush again, “Sorry.”

Mia chuckled, “At least you’re not running off to the lake anymore. Did you bring anything with you?”

“We did. We’ll get it later,” Athena answered for Cullen… Again. He was too busy staring at the room they were in. Where little touches of his childhood could be seen. Athena saw one that she liked and picked it up, “Is this the teddy bear you told me about?”

“The very one,” Mia chuckled at Athena’s non-existent attempt to hide her glee.

The teddy bear looked like it had been through a war. It had one eye, the fur of it was barely there, and the nose and mouth had disappeared. Athena held it like it was the most precious jewel in all the world, “It’s adorable!”

Cullen closed his eyes, blushing again, and mumbled, “That thing should have been burned a long time ago.”

"Mom kept it. She hoped that someday you would want to pass it down to your children.” Mia responded softly, “As much as I want to hear everything, I’m sure you would like to rest. Come down when you’re ready.”

After Mia closed the door Cullen sat down on the bed, still a little bewildered by how his family had held on to some of his childhood things. Athena sat beside him, still holding on to the teddy bear, “Are you okay?”

He looked down at her and saw the teddy bear sitting on her lap and chuckled, “I am. I’m surprised that they kept so much.”

“Why?” Athena was surprised by Curly’s answer.

“I…” Cullen paused, “don’t know. I guess I just never really thought about it. As a Templar we’re taught that we shouldn’t hold on to things, and I guess I just thought that when I left and then when they didn’t hear from me for so long…”

“They love you… I don’t think that stops just because you left and couldn’t keep in touch.” Athena paused, “Like the coin you gave me. I don’t cherish it because it’s a coin, I cherish it and keep it with me because it’s from the man I love.”

Cullen was silent for a while thinking on what she said and looked at all the mementos from his childhood. One was a drawing that he made of his family as a boy. Another was a toy sword and shield that had more than a few nicks in it. And Curly’s personal favorite, the chess set he used to finally beat Mia. There were more, but those were the ones I saw personally.

Athena said barely above a whisper, “The ring you gave me will only leave my finger once, and only because you’ll have to put it back on at the wedding.”

Cullen kissed her and whispered because he didn’t trust his voice, “I love you.”

“I love you, too. Should we go see your sister now?” Athena asked.

“In a minute,” and then Curly smiled mischievously (Yes, I’m shocked), “give me that bear.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s mine.” Curly’s mischievous smile got wider.

“What are you going to do with it?” She wrapped her arms around the bear to protect it. Cullen kissed her and backed her in to laying down on the bed. Athena whispered, breathless, “This isn’t about the bear is it?”

Cullen smiled slow and sensual in response to her question. He gently took the bear from her and put it on a stand beside the bed. He shook his head and started undressing her. Duchess kissed Curly and undressing him, they made love. 

Athena was the first to move from the bed to get dressed. Cullen sat up to watch her, “Do you have anything from when you were a child?”

Athena thought as she finished getting dressed in a lilac dress with bell sleeves, “I have some books, but I don’t really remember playing with any toys…”

Cullen got up to get dressed thinking on how different their childhoods were and said, “I’m sorry.”

“I really don’t mind that you took the bear from me,” Athena misunderstood what his apology was for.

Cullen chuckled, “Not about that. I shouldn’t have asked what I did.”

“Why not?”

“Because we had very different childhoods,” He went over to her and kissed her.

Athena chuckled, “Cullen, you have every right to ask about my past. Even if it is something as simple as what toys I played with. I honestly don’t remember. Now, if you’re ready, I think we’ve kept Mia waiting long enough.”

“I agree,” He took hold of her hand with his. As they were about to leave, Athena looked behind her and saw that the bear had slumped over. She let go of Curly’s hand to fix it. Cullen chuckled, “I’m starting to think you care more about that bear than me.”

Athena came back and took his hand. She pretended as though she was thinking about it. Smiled up at him, and said, “I care about it because it was your first dance partner, and he’s really adorable.”

Curly laughed as they made their way down the stairs. Mia heard the laughter and came out of the kitchen to greet them, “Now, I want to hear everything.”

Athena smiled, “I’m going to go see where our clothing is. You two have a lot of catching up to do.”

“How are you going to get those trunks back here?” Cullen asked. There was no way she could carry them, mage or not.

“I’m sure I’ll think of something,” Athena kissed him, and was out the door before he could offer to go with her.

Cullen closed his eyes to Mia’s soft laughter. Mia said, “She’s right, we have a lot of catching up to do.”

“What would you like to know?” Cullen followed Mia in to the kitchen.

“Everything,” Mia smiled at him as she took a seat at the wood table.

“I don’t think there’s enough time for everything,” Cullen sat across from his sister.

Mia thought for a moment, “I guess you’re right… tell me of Athena. I want to know when and how she claimed your heart, and everything. First date, first kiss. When’s the wedding?”

“She didn’t tell you?” Cullen asked, shocked.

Mia laughed, “Of course she did. I just know you and you would do anything you could to avoid everything except the actual event.”

“She wouldn’t let me,” Cullen groused, “she had me pick the date.”

Mia pretended to be aghast, “Who are you and what have you done with my brother?”

Cullen chuckled, “Athena picked the month, and because of the war we never got around to discussing name-days…"

“And she picked the month you were born…” Mia filled in.

Curly chuckled softly, “I didn’t think it was right for it to be on my name-day so I picked the tenth.”

“Should I expect an official invitation?”

“Yes,” Cullen answered.

“Good. Now tell me of your first date…” 

“Athena tells the story better than I do,” Cullen blushed a little.

“But I’ve already heard her version of it. I have yet to hear yours,” Mia teased.

“I told her that you would write to her daily,” He teased back.

“I most certainly did not! At most every other day, usually it was only twice a week,” Mia sounded indignant. Cullen laughed. Mia smiled, fighting tears and looked out the window.

Cullen noticed the change and asked softly, “Mia?”

“That’s the second time in a little over an hour that I have heard you laugh. A laugh that I thought I would never hear again. When you came home before your final vows, you were so sad. I was worried for you. And then thinking you were dead, not once but twice…” She looked at him with tears close to overflowing.

“I’m so sorry, Mia. After the blight I wasn’t able to talk to anyone. If you had given me a little time, I would have contacted you after Haven. We had to get everyone to safety and fortify defenses before we were attacked again.” He said as gently as he could.

“For two years after the blight, Cullen? If I hadn’t tracked you down, would we have ever heard from you again?” Mia vented a little of her pain.

The door opened, saving Cullen from answering and they heard Athena’s voice, “The first room, on the right, at the top of the stairs.”

Mia quickly dashed away her tears as both her and Cullen stood to greet the new guests. Athena following the soldiers, smiled in to the kitchen, the smile faded when she saw Mia’s still tear filled eyes, “What’s wrong?”

Mia smiled at her, “I’ll be fine.”

Athena looked at Cullen who shook his head and asked, “How did you find Johan and Darius?”

Athena blushed, “They… Found me…”

“Do I want to know?” Cullen asked.

“No,” Athena smiled. The smile disappeared as she heard something fall and Darius swearing, “I’m going to go check on them…” she mounted the stairs.

“Inquisitor, you could have warned me that you brought a trunk full of books,” Darius griped.

“That’s not my trunk. I only brought one book, clothing, and some herbs. Are you hurt?” Athena’s concern for the knight-captain was plain to see.

“Nothing an ale won’t cure. Who’s blasted trunk is this then?” Darius asked.

Athena chuckled, “I don’t know.”

“Do you think we should look inside?” Johan asked.

“It’s the only way we’re going to find out who it belongs to,” Athena said.

Darius and Johan opened the trunk, and saw everything Athena mentioned and three large books. Johan asked, “I thought you said you only brought one book?”

“I did. It’s a little cloth thing that Varric wrote for me to read,” Athena stared at the the three large, leather bound, gilt paged books laying on the very top of her trunk like she could divine an answer from them. “I’m sorry, gentlemen, I have no idea how they got in there…” She paused and smiled, “At least it’s my trunk.” 

“At least we don’t have to carry it back down… Yet,” Darius started limping for the door.

“Darius, are you sure you don’t want me to take a look at your foot?” Athena asked.

“And have a beautiful lady like you swoon because of something other than my charm? No thank you,” Darius winked at her.

Athena laughed, “If you’re sure.”

“Come on, Johan, let’s go find the tavern,” Darius hobbled down the stairs.

Athena followed them down. After thanking them, she closed the door and went toward the kitchen. She stood, uncertain, in the doorway, “Did you want more time?”

“No, my dear, we have time to talk,” Mia smiled at her, “please join us?”

Athena looked at Cullen to make sure he didn’t want more time and he held out his hand for her to join him. “I forgot to tell you about the books,” Cullen said by way of an apology when she sat beside him.

“Are they yours?” Athena asked.

“No, your father wanted you to have them.”

“Why didn’t he just leave them behind at Skyhold?” Athena was bewildered.

“That, he didn’t tell me,” Cullen put his arm around her.

“Why weren’t you traveling with your trunk, Athena?” Mia was surprised by this bit of news.

"I’m used to traveling light. I haven’t seen my trunk since it was packed. It was insisted that I needed more than what I usually carry,” Athena came very close to complaining.

“Not by Cullen?” 

Athena chuckled, “No, a very dear friend. I think she would have had me take all of my clothing if there had been room.”

“What do you usually carry?”

“A satchel that I can fit about a week’s worth of clothing in, a small book, and some herbs,” Athena replied.

“Josephine packed for you?” Curly guessed.

"Yes. If she hadn’t, we’d probably still be in Skyhold.” Athena blushed.

“Why?”

“I kept getting pulled away. Josie got frustrated, and after I came back from what felt like the thousandth interruption, the trunk was packed. I still don’t know what all is in there.” Athena explained.

Cullen shook his head at her and laughed. Mia smiled sadly and looked away. Athena looked at Curly for an answer. When she realized she wasn’t going to get one, she asked, “Mia, what’s wrong?”

“It’s good to hear Cullen laugh again,” Mia almost whispered.

“And that’s why you’re near tears again?” Athena found that to be an odd reason to be upset.

“I had asked Cullen a question shortly before you came in that I have yet to get an answer to,” Mia pinned an unwavering gaze on her younger brother.

“Mia…” Cullen closed his sad, brown eyes and sighed, “You wouldn’t have liked the person I became after the blight. I didn’t like the person I became after the blight.”

“Why?!” Mia was on the verge of breaking with frustration because of her brother.

"I wanted revenge for what happened at the Fereldan Circle,” Cullen’s free hand had laid open on the table, it was now closed into a fist.

“We had heard that Templars had died there… and that there were abominations. You had to fight against the abominations?” Mia asked softly.

“If only it had been that simple,” Cullen said quietly to hide the emotions he was feeling. Athena squeezed the hand she had taken when she sat down beside him, gently encouraging him to continue, “I was tortured to the point where I couldn’t tell reality from what was magic or imagined. I watched my friends die and I could do nothing to help them. I spent years distrusting mages and sometimes wishing them ill because of what happened. If I had held on to that anger and distrust I fear what would have happened to me…” Cullen paused and looked at Athena, “to us.”

Mia and Athena both had tears in their eyes. Athena met his gaze with the quiet strength of unconditional trust and love, “But you didn’t. Don’t you see what an amazing man that makes you? To me, that makes you a hero… My hero.”

Cullen closed his eyes to hide his tears, and asked, “What of the innocent people that died at Kirkwall because I trusted my knight-commander? If I had stood up to her sooner, lives could have been saved.”

“Or more could have been lost. Yours could have been lost….” Cullen’s eyes opened then and he looked at her, knowing he didn’t tell Athena about the threat on his life from Meredith. “If I hadn’t picked up the elven orb thing at Haven, I would still be wondering what happened to the Templar with the kind voice and smile that helped me after falling down the stairs….” Athena trailed off.

“You two knew each other before the Inquisition?” Mia was slowly recovering from all that was said.

“I was fifteen and had a crush on a Templar who was visiting my circle. I never saw him take his helmet off, but he was one of a handful of people that treated me as though I was human. Only to find out much later that it was Cullen.”

“You never told me that you went to Ostwick…” Mia said to Cullen.

“It was only for a week. It was the last part of my training,” Cullen responded.

“It’s getting late, and Rosalie and Branson are very excited to see both of you tomorrow,” Mia stood. As they hugged each other goodnight, Mia whispered in Curly’s ear, “Athena’s right, you are an amazing man and a hero.”

Cullen nodded, acknowledging that he heard her, “Goodnight, Mia.”

Once Athena and Cullen were in their room, he sat down heavily on the bed. Athena, who had been taking off her shoes on the other side of the room, came over and sat beside him and with the patience of a revered mother, waited for him to speak, “Why did you say that I was your hero?”

“Because it’s true,” Cullen scoffed at what he thought was a flippant answer, “I meant what I said, Cullen. Precious few people could endure what you’ve gone through, much less continue to care about others,” Athena waited for a response. When she didn’t get one, she asked, “What are you thinking?”

Cullen half smiled, “That I’m in love with the most amazing woman this world has ever seen and that I…” 

“Don’t,” Athena interrupted.

“Would really like to kiss her,” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her interruption.

"Oh... I would like that," Athena smiled and they kissed.

“What did you think I was going to say?” Cullen asked when the kiss ended.

“Something else,” Athena blushed.

Cullen shook his head and questioned, “How did you find out about Knight-Commander Meredith’s threat?”

“I over heard Varric and Hawke talking.”

“Why didn’t you say anything then?” 

“Cullen, neither of us have a past we enjoy talking about. Other than bringing up painful memories, what purpose would it have served?” She asked. Cullen nodded in understanding, “I’m sorry for interrupting you and Mia.”

“Don’t be,” Cullen rubbed his neck, “I don’t think I would have been able to tell her without your support.”

“All I did was hold your hand,” Athena said softly.

“And you didn’t pull away. You never have…” Cullen’s voice was just as soft as he moved closer to her.

“Neither have you. I would have never been able to face Corypheus, or Bernard and Evelyn on my own. Or be able to read my mother’s journal, or try to play chess…” Athena was interrupted.

“You’ve made your point,” Cullen moved closer for a kiss.

Athena continued as desire lit her eyes and smiled, “Or play Wicked Grace…”

“I’m never playing that again,” Cullen felt the same desire.

“Yes, you are,” Athena teased. She laid on the bed, and he just narrowly missed kissing her.

“No, I’m not,” he straddled her.

“Aww, but I love seeing you naked.”

“You don’t need a game for that,” Cullen argued sultrily, whipping off his shirt and kissing her.

"Then next time you'll have to try and get me naked..." Athena whispered as the kiss ended. Instead of answering her, Curly finished taking off his clothes and came very close to ripping Athena’s clothes off to which she murmured, “Maybe Josie was right….”

“Hush, you,” Cullen’s voice was thick with passion. 

As Athena reached the heights of her passion, she whispered in his ear, “my hero.”

**

Athena woke up an hour before dawn, for some unknown reason feeling like a caged animal. She didn’t want to leave Cullen because she doubted that he had told Mia about his dreams, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something really bad was about to happen. Curly’s dreams started, and she, as usual, started whispering in his ear, “I love you, you’re my hero…” And so on.

Mia had heard Cullen crying out for help, and opened the door to see Athena holding his hand and whispering in his ear, she asked, “What are you doing?”

Athena looked over at Mia, “Telling him that I love him.”

“Then why is he calling out for help?”

“That’s for Cullen to tell you if he wishes,” Athena said gently.

“Are you putting a spell on him?” Mia came in to the room to investigate further.

"No, Mia, I'm not," Athena looked back at Cullen who had stopped calling for help and was slowly waking up. Athena whispered as his eyes opened, “Morning.”

“Morning,” he whispered back.

“Cullen, you were calling for help…” Mia trailed off, still worried.

Curly closed his eyes, almost thinking that his nightmares were preferable to the interrogation he was now going to get… Almost, “Mia, can you give us ten minutes to wake up and get dressed, please?” Mia looked uncertain and didn’t move for a while. Cullen sat up, “I will answer all of your questions, if you let us get dressed.”

“Are you safe with her?” Mia asked. 

“Of course I’m safe with her! Why would you think…” Cullen stopped because he noticed Athena shaking her head, “Mia, please?”

Mia left without saying another word and Cullen sighed, collapsing on the bed. Athena half smiled at him and ran her fingers through his hair, “She saw me whispering in your ear while you were dreaming and thought I was casting a spell on you. She also asked me why you were calling out for help.”

“Did you tell her?” 

“No," Athena said softly, “I promised you that I wouldn’t.”

“My sister’s a little different, but thank you,” He sat up to kiss her.

“I think it might be best if you talked to Mia alone…” 

Cullen sighed again, “You’re probably right. What are you going to do?”

Athena smiled, “Figure out what’s in my trunk.” 

Cullen chuckled, kissed her, and groaned, “I need to go before Mia starts pounding down the door.”

Athena smiled at him, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Curly disappeared through the door.

Once the door closed, a heavy sigh shuddered through Athena’s petite body that brought tears with it. She understood Mia’s question and knew if it had been her in Mia’s position, she would have asked it too, but hearing the question still hurt. Once her tears were spent, she started to explore her trunk.

**

Curly was wishing he was upstairs helping (distracting) Athena unpack, or dancing at the Winter Palace, or playing Wicked Grace… Mia was pacing, not knowing where to start. Cullen was starting to get a headache just watching her, “Mia, sit down.”

“You were calling out for help!” Mia exclaimed.

“I will explain everything once you sit,” he said emphatically. Mia let out an exasperated sigh and sat. “Since the blight, I’ve had horrible dreams. Most nights it’s impossible for me to get a decent night’s sleep. Athena talks to me when I have those dreams. It helps me sleep better.”

“You hear her? Are you sure she’s not using her magic on you?” Mia asked.

“Most of the time I hear her, and no she’s not using using her abilities on me. She’s telling me that she loves me, that it’s just a dream.” Cullen paused, “She’s a healer, Mia, and unless circumstances prevent it, she tells everyone before she uses magic on them.”

“And what circumstances would those be?”

"If someone was dying. The queen of Fereldan nor the baby she found would be alive without Athena almost killing herself to save them. When Athena and I went in to battle together, she told me before the battle that she would be casting a barrier around me. She didn’t have to tell me, but she did,” Cullen drummed his fingers on the table. He wanted to get up and pace.

“What’s a barrier? And how did she almost kill herself?” Mia was calming down a little.

“Magical armor. Athena doesn’t use anything to strengthen her magic. When she exceeds her magical limits, she usually ends up hurting herself. Because of the condition the Queen and baby were found in, Athena did everything in her power to save them. She came back to Skyhold unconscious, with nearly every bone in her body broken,” Cullen stopped, not wanting to dwell any further on what he still felt was his error, “I understand your concern. More importantly, I know Athena understands your concern. I also know that by asking her if she was casting a spell on me, hurt her.”

“How do you know that?”

"Because I had asked the same thing the first time she started talking me out of my dreams, and her eyes filled with tears. I love her, Mia. When I’m with her, I feel whole… And I haven’t felt that way in a very long time. If I had any doubts, I wouldn’t have asked Athena to marry me.”

Mia closed her eyes to hide her tears, “I’m sorry.”

"You have nothing to apologize for, Mia," Athena came in to the kitchen, “I would have done the same.”

“I should have trusted my brother’s judgement,” Mia opened her eyes.

Curly was shocked to hear Athena's voice and wondered how much she heard, but was even more shocked by what Mia said, “I-“ Curly turned to watch his fiancee, “Athena, how much did you hear?” Athena smiled at him in answer. Curly asked, “You’re not going to tell me, are you?”

Athena chuckled, "We’ll talk about it later, my love."

"You two should get out and see a bit of South Reach before Rosalie and Branson arrive. They should be here after lunch,” Mia said.

“Not joining us?” Athena asked.

“No, I think I’ve imposed enough on your morning,” Mia smiled.

“Where would you like to go?” Cullen took hold of her hand with his.

“We should check on Darius. He was limping when he left last night,” Athena answered.

“Then I guess the best place to start would be the tavern. First, I want to know what you heard,” Cullen stopped and pulled Athena close to him.

Athena put her arms around his neck and stood on tiptoe to kiss him, “I promise you that we will talk about it later.” A couple soldiers passed by and applauded, causing both Curly and Athena to blush.

One of the soldiers was Johan, “If you’re looking for Knight-Captain Darius, he’s at the tavern.”

“How did you know…?” Cullen was bewildered.

“I figured the Inquisitor would want to check up on him,” Johan said as he waved goodbye.

Cullen chuckled and looked down at his love, “Your reputation proceeds you.”

“I guess it does,” Athena sounded lost in thought, “I wonder why Darius isn’t with his daughter.” 

“Let’s find out,” Curly said as they started walking again.

Darius was sitting at the bar with his back to the door when they walked in to the tavern. Cullen asked, “Darius?’

“Hi, Commander. Care for a drink?” Darius tossed back the mostly full drink he had, not noticing that Duchess was with Cullen.

“It’s a bit early in the day for that, isn’t it?” Cullen asked.

“I guess so, but after the morning I’ve had…” Darius trailed off and ordered another ale.

“What happened?” Cullen shook his head at the barkeep signaling he didn’t want anything.

“My ex said that she lied to me. The little girl isn’t mine, and then I was handed the letters I wrote. They were unopened,” Darius took a deep drink.

“I’m so sorry,” Cullen said, sympathetically.

“I’ll be fine. I knew she was a liar, I just didn’t think she would lie about this…” Darius said, “Now with a beautiful and amazing woman as the Inquisitor on your arm, what are you doing checking up on an old man like me?”

“That amazing and beautiful lady was worried about you,” Cullen grinned as Athena’s blush got brighter.

Darius chuckled softly, “My foot is fine, Athena. Thank you for checking.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Get out of here you two. No need to watch an old man wallow in self pity,” Darius said.

Athena hugged Darius and said softly, “She’s a fool.”

Darius closed his green eyes to hide the tears, “And you are too kind.”

“Tommy, a teddy bear, now my second in command… Why do I have to compete for your affection?” Curly teased gently.

“When Leliana stops getting requests for your hand in marriage from Halamshiral, every new person in Skyhold stops approaching Josie to see who you’re courting, and about once a week I’m asked by travelers if you’re available,” Athena teased back.

Darius chuckled as he released Athena, “Even if I was interested in the Inquisitor, I wouldn’t stand a chance, she’s only ever had eyes for you.”

Athena blushed, and sighed, “You two are as bad as Dorian and Varric.”

Cullen took hold of her, “I’m allowed to be after all the grief you give me.”

“The grief I give you? I wasn’t the one getting my bottom pinched,” Athena smirked. Curly playfully growled and kissed her.

Darius laughed, “Get a room you two.”

Athena smiled at Darius after the kiss ended, “Are you sure you’ll be okay?”

“Yes. Eventually I’ll find Johan getting in to some sort of mischief that he’ll need rescuing from… like last night. I swear that boy is prone to mishaps,” Darius responded. Athena giggled.

Cullen was now very curious, “You never did tell me how you found them last night…”

Athena laughed, “You asked if you wanted to know, and I said no.”

"Commander, you really don't want to know," Darius laughed with her, "take that beautiful lady of yours out of here and do something fun.”

The trio said their goodbyes, and as soon as the lovers were out of the tavern, Curly asked, “What happened last night?”

“I was on my way to the stables when I saw Johan being dunked in to a barrel of water. As I was walking over to stop it, Darius stopped me. I didn’t get the full story, but it had something to do with cheating at a game…I think. Darius finally intervened, saying that I had a special mission for them. After Johan changed clothes, they got our stuff,” Athena answered.

Cullen shook his head, “I need a guard for our soldiers.”

Athena laughed, “The person doing the dunking was one of our soldiers.”

Curly shook his head and sighed at the shenanigans, “Interested in playing chess?”

“You don’t play fair anymore,” Athena playfully pouted.

“That’s because you’re too distracting.”

"Do you think South Reach has a lake?" Athena ignored his response... Sort of.

“You want to go swimming?” 

“Yes!” 

“No,” Cullen paused, “At least, not during the day.”

“Tonight then?” 

Cullen chuckled as he glanced around town. They were in the square of town and at least that part was built like a smaller Denerim square, “We’ll see.”

“We can play Wicked Grace…” Athena smiled.

“No.”

“It’d just be you and me,” she was doing her best to convince him.

“No, I know….” Cullen stopped seeing Athena’s violet eyes light with desire for something other than games. He said, quietly, “Maybe we should have taken Darius’s advice.”

“Which advice would that be?”

“Getting a room,” Cullen grabbed hold of her waist, lifted her up, and kissed her.

“That would be good advice to follow,” she whispered.

“Cullen?” A female voice pulled their attention away from each other.

“Hello, Rosalie,” Cullen put Athena back on the ground and turned toward his dark haired sister. Athena bowed her head, blushing. Cullen whispered before completely releasing her, “It’s about time I get you back for all the times you get me to blush.”

Athena gasped and almost fell because she lifted her head so quickly that she lost her balance. Cullen chuckled, and reached out a hand to steady her. Athena teased, “I’m going to tell Josie that you need another week of fittings.”

“Don’t you dare!” 

Athena smiled to officially meet Rosalie, “Hello.”

“And you must be the Inquisitor,” Rosalie got Athena to blush again. Curly chuckled, seeing Duchess blush often was something he could get used to.

"Please call me Athena," she playfully glared at Curly, “It’s nice to meet you, Rosalie. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“From Cullen?” Rosalie asked as she and Athena hugged.

“Mostly from Mia.”

“That’s what I thought,” Rosalie chuckled.

“She never asked, and she had a habit of reading my mail,” Cullen complained as he gave his youngest sister a hug. 

Athena shrugged, completely unapologetic, “The letters from Mia provided too much temptation.”

Rosalie laughed and then winced. Curly became instantly worried, “Should you be walking around?”

Rosalie chuckled, “I’m pregnant, Cullen, not ill.”

“But you’re in pain…” Cullen argued.

“More like constant discomfort.”

“When are you due?” Athena asked as Rosalie hooked arms with her.

“Yesterday,” she answered. 

“Really?” Athena was confused.

“That’s what the healers were telling me…” Rosalie trailed off, not sure how else to explain.

“And what do you think?”

“I don’t know…” Rosalie stopped walking to rub her belly, “I just want this to be over with. Mia said that you’re a healer?”

“I am, why do you ask?” Athena held Cullen’s hand as they started walking toward Mia’s house again.

"I know it seems silly, but the healer is now telling me it could be another month, and that just seems too long…” Rosalie looked like she wanted to cry.

“Did you want me to check?” Athena offered.

“I know we’ve only just met, and I shouldn’t be asking, but… Yes,” Rosalie blushed.

Cullen swore under his breath. He did not want to hear this conversation, “Maker’s breath!”

Athena chuckled at him, “We both spent most of our lives living in a circle. You cannot tell me that you haven’t been around pregnant women.”

Curly blushed and grumbled, “They weren’t my youngest sister and whenever those discussions happened I did my best to not listen.”

Athena chuckled again, “Rosalie, I will help in whatever way I can.”

“Thank you!” Rosalie hugged Athena.

“You’re welcome,” Athena returned the hug and was promptly kicked by the baby for it.

They made it back to Mia’s house and Athena and Rosalie disappeared upstairs. Cullen did his best to wear a hole in Mia’s hardwood floor while they waited. When they came back down Mia asked, “Well?”

“Athena says the baby should be here by the end of the week,” a smiling Rosalie answered.

“Shouldn’t she be in bed?” Cullen asked.

“Sure, if she wants to prolong the pregnancy,” Athena sat down beside him. (Cullen quickly sat when he heard one of the bedroom doors open to hide his pacing from Duchess. My thanks to Mia for this bit.)

“Why would that—“ Curly stopped when all three ladies looked at him, “on second thought, I don’t want to know.”

“Do you two want children?” Rosalie asked Cullen and Athena.

Athena looked at Cullen to see if he wanted to answer, he shook his head. Mia found that odd, “Does that mean you don’t want kids?”

Cullen blushed, “No, it means I don’t want to answer the question.”

Athena smiled, “Eventually.” 

“Would you be able to with your hand being marked?” Mia asked as gently as she could.

“I don’t know,” Athena looked at her left hand and turned it over to see the green magic that marred an otherwise elegant hand.

“Is there anyone you can talk to about it?” Rosalie shifted, unable to find a comfortable position. Which didn’t go unnoticed by Athena.

"Can we worry about getting married first?” Curly pleaded, causing everyone to laugh and Rosalie winced again.

“Rosalie, would you like to go for a walk with me?" Athena had been watching her fiance’s youngest sibling carefully.

“Yes, please?” Rosalie, who was maybe an inch taller than Athena, struggled to get out of her seat.

Cullen stopped Athena from helping his sister by stepping in. Once Rosalie was secure in standing, Athena smiled at him, “We’ll be back.”

“Do you want me to come along?” Cullen didn’t want to go, but felt like he was honor bound to offer. 

“No, we’ll be fine,” Athena said with a healer’s calm.

“Athena…” Cullen trailed off, not really sure why, but he was very worried.

“Cullen, I’ve done this a time or two before. Relax, play a game of chess with Mia.”

“One of your duties at the circle was being a midwife.” Cullen put together why his love was so calm, and he took comfort from that.

“Being Inquisitor hasn’t changed that, and we aren’t going far,” Athena promised with a secret smile, “Are you ready, Rosalie?”

Rosalie, who was holding her back and holding on to Athena, nodded her head, “Yes. Where did you want to walk to?”

“I was thinking through the garden and up the stairs,” Athena doubted they would get that far. To Mia she mouthed “water and towels.”

“Why would we go upstairs again?” Rosalie asked.

“There’s a book I wanted to get. But I would like seeing Mia’s garden first,” Athena didn’t want to worry the young woman.

When they left Mia got the water and towels ready and put them in an unoccupied bedroom. Cullen felt like he was in the way and wanted to help in some way, “What are you doing?”

Mia chuckled, "Rosalie has been uncomfortable for weeks. If I’m reading what Athena is doing correctly, she is in labor.”

Cullen jumped out of his seat, “I’m going to go get her."

“If you rush out there panicked you’re going to scare Rosalie and make it harder on Athena. It seems she has every intention of delivering this baby,” Mia stood in front of him with her arms crossed.

“But she shouldn’t be—“ Cullen was interrupted.

“Cullen, you said you trusted Athena,” Mia reminded him.

Curly sighed. He did trust Athena, but this side of her was completely new to him, “Where’s Rosalie’s husband?”

"We haven’t heard from him for months now,” Mia said sadly.

“He left?” Cullen tamped down the sudden rage he felt toward the soon to be father.

“He said he had business to take care of on the other side of Fereldan, that was three months ago. You can’t tell Rosalie that I told you.”

“I won’t,” Cullen said quietly. And then he heard a tapping at one of the windows and saw that it was Athena, “Maker’s breath, I knew I should have went with them.”

Mia chuckled, “ You wouldn’t have enjoyed the conversation.”

Cullen ran out of the house. Athena saw him running and calmly demanded him to stop. Cullen stopped. Athena turned her attention back to Curly’s sister “Rosalie, Cullen and I are going to help you back in to the house and up the stairs.”

“Athena?” Rosalie was breathless and holding her belly.

“Yes, love?” Athena struggled to hold Rosalie up as she was doubled over.

“Is it okay if I sit for a bit?” Rosalie straightened as much as she could.

“Certainly,” Athena guided her over to a bench and motioned for Cullen to come over. He walked over to her and once she was certain that Rosalie was sitting safely, Duchess went to talk to him, “Rosalie can still walk, it will make the labor easier if she does so. But being smaller than her, I’m not the best to lean on. Cullen?”

“Yes?” He watched his sister groan in pain and he paled.

“Stay calm. She’s terrified,” Athena ordered.

“How long have you known?” Cullen asked.

“Since you introduced us this afternoon,” Athena’s calm smile was a balm on his frayed nerves. Rosalie let out a moan and Athena said quietly, “That’s our signal.”

Athena walked back over to Curly’s sister, “Rosalie, Cullen is going to help you back into the house and up the stairs, but you have to walk. Everything that’s about to happen will go much easier if you walk.”

Rosalie, who was near tears, moaned, “It hurts, Athena.”

“I know, but you’re almost at the end of this part,” Athena gently hugged her, “ready?”

Cullen put one strong arm around his sister’s waist once she was standing and Athena led them in to the house and up the stairs. Branson and Mia were in the kitchen. Mia could be heard telling him what was happening.

Once Rosalie was settled in bed, Athena told Cullen, “You don’t have to stay.” 

“Aren’t you going to need help?” Cullen wanted to help, but he also wanted to run at the first chance he got. He was amazed at how calm his fiancee was, especially since he felt like there was chaos happening.

“A midwife would be nice,” Athena smiled at him, lessening the churning he was feeling.

“No! The midwife doesn’t like me,” Rosalie was unable to be still, clutching at the sheets as another contraction hit her.

“Someone should be here to support her,” Athena said quietly as she felt Rosalie’s belly, and then peeked under the blankets. “Who would you like it to be, Rosalie?”

“It can’t be just you and me?” Rosalie asked in between groans of pain. 

Athena waited for the contraction to pass before answering, “I’m sorry, but it can’t. We should really have at least three people in here.”

“That can be arranged,” Cullen quickly headed for the door.

“No, this is embarrassing enough without having Mia or Branson in here too,” Rosalie ground out.

“Why is being in labor embarrassing?” Cullen asked quietly. He walked across the small room to stand beside the bed his sister was occupying.

“Because Geordan isn’t here,” Rosalie panted.

“Rosalie, deep, slow breaths," Athena said as she moved the bowl of water and towels closer to the bed.

“Why isn’t he here?” Cullen sat beside his sister on the bed, but his eyes followed every move Athena made. She noticed and smiled at him.

"Because he’s in love with someone else,” Rosalie moaned.

“Breathe, Rosalie,” Athena gently reminded her and disappeared under the blankets again.

“Isn’t there something you can do for the pain?” She begged.

Athena looked at Rosalie, “Keep talking and breathing. If I took the pain away or even lessened it, I wouldn’t be able to know when the right time would be for you to push.”

Cullen breathed an almost inaudible sigh of relief at Athena's answer. He asked his sister, “Geordan left you to be with someone else?”

Athena was on the other side of the bed making a small towel wet and then washed Rosalie’s face with it, and noticed that she was holding her breath again, “Breathe.”

Rosalie let her breath out slowly, “Thank you. And, yes, Cullen, he did.”

“Mia doesn’t know?” Cullen desperately wanted to hit something, preferably, his sister’s husband.

“No, and I don’t want her to. It’s better this way,” Rosalie said, ending in a groan.

"It's time,” Athena said quietly, “Rosalie, you are going to want to hold on to your knees. Cullen, you’re going to have to help her sit up by placing your hands on her back.” When everyone was situated per Athena’s directions, she ordered Rosalie to push. And said it with each contraction. In fifteen minutes a baby boy was born. Athena cleaned up the baby and then handed him to Cullen who paled and Athena chuckled. Athena cleaned up Rosalie and asked Cullen to hand the baby over. When the newly born was done eating he was placed in a cradle close to Rosalie’s bed.

Rosalie was sleeping by the time the lovers left and went to their room so Athena could change. She looked down at her dress and murmured, “Josie’s going to kill me.”

“I doubt that,” Cullen tamped down the urge to go find this wayward husband of his sister’s.

Athena gingerly pulled off her ruined dress, “What were you thinking when I handed you the baby?”

"That I was going to drop him," Cullen blushed. Athena chuckled as she pulled out another dress, prompting him to ask, “Why is that funny?”

“That was my reaction when I had to help deliver a child for the first time,” Athena answered.

“I can’t imagine you ever being afraid of holding a child,” Cullen said softly as he walked over to Duchess, feeling his rage melt away.

“Child? No. I had just turned twelve when the midwife became very sick. The lady that was pregnant decided to rush things along. The midwife’s apprentice, me, and the pregnant lady were the only ones in the garden when she went in to labor,” Athena paused as she remembered. “As fast and hard as the labor was, it’s a miracle they both survived. Anyway, once the baby was born, the apprentice handed it off to me, like I was supposed to know what to do with it. I was terrified, the baby was crying, the mother was screaming, and the apprentice was yelling at the mother and me. Because of all the yelling and crying, my mother and father came out. My mother took the baby from me and told me to go inside, which I was happy to do.” 

“How did the Templars not notice any of this going on?” Cullen was once again shocked by Duchess’ tales of circle life.  
Athena wearily sat down on the bed, “The mother had used blood magic to rush the labor, and it was when the rotation changed. Everyone was still getting updated on the previous watch, and it was all over except for the screaming in fifteen minutes.”

“So the mother planned it so she wouldn’t get caught.” Cullen sat down beside her.

“It didn’t work out that way,” Athena yawned.

“Tired?”

“Very,” Athena sighed and leaned against him, “But I want to check on Rosalie and the babies and I’m sure we’re wanted downstairs.”

“Athena, the sun’s about to rise…”

“It is?” Athena was amazed that so much time had passed.

Cullen chuckled, “You check on Rosalie, and I will let Mia and Branson know. I’m sure they’ve been up all night too.”

“Thank you for staying.”

“I’m glad I could help… I think,” they both chuckled softly, “You will allow more than two people to be with you if…” Cullen trailed off.

Athena’s eyes got wide, “Yes! I wasn’t lying when I said there should be at least three people in the room.”

Cullen yawned, “As much as I would love to hear those stories.” Athena chuckled and yawned too, “Before we both pass out, let’s go do what we said we were going to do.”

Cullen let Mia and Branson know that everyone was well and that they had a new nephew to spoil. Athena checked in to see that the new family was sleeping peacefully. The lovers met at the door to their room as the sun rose. Cullen gently took hold of Athena and kissed her. She leaned into the kiss so much that he picked her up and carried her to their bed. Athena fell asleep while he was carrying her. Curly fell asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow.


	27. Chapter 27

At breakfast the next morning, Athena got to meet Branson and everyone was cooing over the baby. Branson asked, “Teach Athena to play chess yet?”

Cullen smirked, “She gets distracted easily.”

“Mia was right, you’re a horrible teacher and you don’t play fair,” Athena griped, handing the baby back to Rosalie.

Everyone laughed, except Mia who frowned, “Cullen you better not be cheating.”

“I’m not!”

“Might as well be for all the good it does me,” Athena protested.

"Athena, by the time you leave here I will make certain you know how to play,” Mia was incredibly confident.

“But I can beat you,” Cullen challenged Mia.

“How long has it been since we played?” Mia smirked.

“Too long,” Branson got the chess board and pieces out.

Rosalie sighed, “I’m going back to bed.”

"Do you want help?” Athena offered.

“Yes, please,” Rosalie sighed. Athena took the baby and assisted a still weak Rosalie up the stairs.

When Athena came back down Cullen asked, “Is Rosalie okay?”

“Yes, she’s just tired,” Athena smiled at him.

“Cullen, your move,” Mia said impatiently.

“You’re impatient, Mia… Worried?” Cullen smirked.

“It’s good to know some things never change,” Branson said quietly.

Mia chuckled softly as she made her move, “Not at all. I just would like to get your defeat out of the way so I can teach your love how to defeat you.”

“That’s if you win,” Cullen moved his knight.

“I have you in three, dear brother,” Mia smirked.

“It might be safer if I teach you to play, Athena,” Branson offered.

Both Cullen and Mia looked at him, “No.”

Athena chuckled, “You may be right, Branson.”

Curly shook his head and declared, “Check mate, Mia.”

“Again?” Mia asked.

Cullen caught Athena looking out the window, “I don’t think so…. We haven’t had a chance to explore South Reach yet.”

"The lake is to south, there’s a very pretty meadow to the west, the chantry is to the north, and to the east is the graveyard.” Branson informed them as he and Cullen switched places.

Athena glanced up the stairs. Mia smiled, understanding Duchess’s hesitancy, “I know you gave her a bell in case she needed anything, and there’s no where that I need to be today.”

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes, go. Rosalie and the baby will be fine,” Mia answered.

Curly and Athena left with Athena teasing quietly, “We never did get to go for that swim….”

“After the sun sets,” Cullen promised as he pulled her close and kissed her.

“Where would you like to go first?” Athena asked.

“I would like to pay my respects to my parents…” Cullen said quietly.

“Then east it is,” Athena took his hand and they walked to the graveyard. 

She paused outside the gates prompting Curly to ask, “Not coming?”

“You don’t want to do this alone?” Athena was trying to hide her uneasiness.

“You don’t have to wait outside the gates,” Cullen found her hesitancy odd. She was usually so supportive in difficult places.

Athena looked away, “If you’re sure…”

“Athena, are you afraid?”

“Terrified.”

“Of what?” Cullen was stunned.

“I’ve always had a fear of graveyards. No rhyme or reason. It’s just that anytime I get near one, I want to run in the other direction,” Athena blushed to the roots of her auburn hair.

To give Curly his due, he really did try to not laugh, unfortunately a chuckle did escape, “Of all the things you’ve faced without fear… And graveyards scare you?”

“That’s only because I was too angry and determined to be afraid,” Athena paused, “if I had had to fight Corypheus in a graveyard, I think I would have curled up into a little ball and hid.”

Cullen shook his head, “You give yourself too little credit, and,” He pulled her close to his side, “I’ll protect you.”

“You’re going to make me go in, aren’t you?” Athena trembled with fear.

“Yes. I promise you that I won’t let go,” Cullen hoped to calm her.

“Any other time, that would work,” Athena barely inched forward. Staring at the place like it was going to attack her. She did have to admit that it looked peaceful, for a graveyard.

“If you come with me now, I promise that when we get back to Skyhold, we’ll play Wicked Grace and stay for the entire game,” Curly promised.

Athena looked trepidatiously at the graveyard, with its large trees, stone wall, and eery quiet. She closed her eyes, “Andraste preserve me.”

Cullen waited for Athena to open her eyes, after a couple minutes he said, “Athena, you’re going to have to open your eyes to walk.”

Athena sighed and looked at him, “Let’s go.”

Cullen put an arm around her waist for support (and to nudge her along when she stopped.) They reached his parents’ graves and he released Athena’s waist to take her hand. She whispered, “You don’t have to…”

Cullen caressed her cheek with his free fingers and kissed her gently. When the kiss ended, he said, “I promised you that I wouldn’t let go.” Cullen then kneeled down to brush away some leaves and said a small prayer. 

Athena closed her eyes and listened to Curly’s softly spoken words, finding a little bit of her terror abating… At least until she heard a noise behind her that made her jump. Duchess looked behind her and saw nothing. Cullen heard the noise as well and chuckled a little, “Ready?”

“Maker, yes.” Athena walked swiftly to get out of the graveyard. Of course on the way out Athena tripped over a tree root and she swore, “Emerald Graves all over again.”

Curly heard her and once they were safely away from the graveyard he had to ask, “When you went to the Emerald Graves, were you afraid there?” Athena’s blush was all he needed for an answer. “How did you hide your fear from Dorian and Varric?”

“I didn’t. They saw that I was afraid, but I wouldn’t tell them why.”

“I’m sure they came up with reasons,” Cullen groaned. He correctly guessed that many of our reasons included him.

Athena chuckled, “Several…. after I dissuaded them from thinking it was something about us.”

Cullen shook his head, “I’m sure that was the first thing they jumped to.”

Athena laughed, “It was,” a pause and a sigh, “I wish I knew why they made me so afraid.”

“Everyone has something they’re afraid of. Granted, most are afraid of spiders,” Cullen said as they walked west to the meadow.

“What are you afraid of?” 

“You already know my fears,” he answered quietly.

“Those fears have very understandable reasons,” Athena stopped to stand in front of him, “Do you have a fear of graveyards or spiders for no reason?”

Curly chuckled softly, “No, I don’t.”

Athena gasped with delight when they stood at the meadow’s edge. It was a field of deep green, dotted with purple and blue bell flowers, that had a heady scent, “It’s beautiful!” She pulled on Curly’s hand until they had reached the middle of the meadow and asked, “May I have this dance?”

“There isn’t any music.”

“Josie taught you with music?” Athena was surprised. She wished she could’ve had music at her dance lessons.

“Yes… Why are you asking?” 

“Leliana asked if we could have music, she was refused,” Athena listened to the birds chirping away. “The birds singing is music enough.”

Cullen brought her in close and started to twirl around the meadow with her, “Only you would ask to dance in a field of flowers.”

“This time you only have one admirer,” Athena gently teased.

“And your admiration is all I need,” he said softly. Athena blushed and smiled at him.

They danced until Curly got hungry. Athena chuckled as she heard his stomach growl. In response to her laughter, he sounded slightly exasperated, “I will never understand how you can go all day without getting hungry.”

Athena shrugged and looked wistfully back at the meadow, “A perfect place for a picnic too.”

Cullen laughed at her, "Should we have the meadow moved to Skyhold?"

Athena smiled brightly, “Yes!”

Cullen shook his head, laughing as they entered Mia’s house. Mia heard his laughter and smiled, “Having a good day?”

“Very much so,” Athena answered.

“Where did you two adventure off to?” Branson asked.

“The graveyard and the meadow,” Curly answered.

“That’s it?” Mia was surprised. South Reach wasn’t exactly a large place.

“We… Lost track of time at the meadow,” Cullen blushed slightly.

“What were you doing?” Rosalie questioned as she fed her baby.

“We were dancing,” Athena sat on the armrest of Curly’s chair.

A chorus of awws came from Mia and Rosalie while Branson chuckled. Curly closed his eyes and groaned. Athena whispered in his ear, “I’ll make it up to you at the lake later.” Cullen opened his eyes and looked into her violet ones. His brown eyes lighting with a hunger that had nothing to do with food. Athena smiled, “The reason we stopped was because you were hungry.”

“You should eat too,” Cullen ignored his sibling’s laughter.

“I’m not hungry,” Athena impishly responded.

“You’re never hungry,” Cullen griped.

Athena chuckled and disappeared in to the kitchen to get some food. Mia was shocked that Cullen was still sitting there, “You make Athena wait on you?”

“No! Why would you ask that?!” 

“Why is she the only one in the kitchen?”

“Was I supposed to knock her off the chair and race her to the kitchen?!” Curly asked, incredulous.

Breathless laughter could be heard from the kitchen. Mia responded, “No, but you could have followed her.”

Before Curly could rejoin Athena was back with tears in her eyes from laughing so hard and handed Cullen his plate, “I don’t mind, Mia.”

Cullen, still miffed, grumbled, “Where is your plate?”

Athena laughed, “I told you that I wasn’t hungry, and I really don’t want racing to become another of your competitions.”

“The last time I had to run somewhere, you were unconscious,” Curly griped.

“The Queen of Fereldan?” Mia asked gently.

“Yes,” Cullen answered curtly, trying to hide the guilt he was still feeling.

“What’s this?” Branson questioned.

“Athena saved the Queen of Fereldan and a baby that the royals have since claimed as theirs,” Mia responded.

“On second thought, I think I will get something to eat…” Athena got up and disappeared in to the kitchen. She wanted no part of this discussion as she was still upset with herself for being so irresponsible. (Have I mentioned yet that our lovers are excellent at beating themselves up?)

This time Cullen quickly followed her, “I’m sorry, Athena.”

She smiled sadly at him, “It’s okay. I just never thought of where you might have been when Cassandra brought me back.”

“Still… I shouldn’t have…” Curly was interrupted with a kiss.

“Cullen, it’s okay. I still love you,” Athena wrinkled her nose with a smile.

Cullen chuckled softly, “Good, because I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Should we go back to your family? I’m sure they would like to hear the story...” Athena trailed off.

“I thought you wanted to eat?” Curly asked.

“I wanted to grab a cookie.” Athena blushed and confessed, “I have a weakness for chocolate chip cookies.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “At least I’ve now found a food that you actively seek out.”

“Cullen!” Athena’s pink tinged cheeks turned red.

He laughed, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush as much as you have today. Why don’t we go for that swim now?”

“The sun hasn’t set,” Athena said.

“It will soon,” Cullen smiled and took hold of her hand. The idea of swimming in the lake was growing on him. 

As they walked back through the living room and to the door, Rosalie asked, “Leaving so soon?”

Cullen chuckled, “Keeping a promise.”

Athena wished them a good night and with Curly on her arm, headed south for the lake. They faced west so they could watch the last rays of the sun disappear. Cullen stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Athena sighed a deep and contented sigh as she reached up to hold his muscular forearms. 

Curly didn’t realize he was whispering when he said, “You once told me that you wished you could bottle my laughter. I wish I could do the same for that sigh.”

Athena turned in his arms and kissed him, “Thank you.”

“You’re… Welcome?”

“Cullen, it's very quiet here. I heard what you said.”

Curly blushed, and attempted to change the subject, “Did you still want to go for that swim?”

Athena smiled, “Of course.”

**

The first week was mostly relaxing and flew by. Athena told Curly’s family of her confusing past, how she got the anchor, and about defeating Corypheus. Rosalie, the baby, and Branson eventually went to their own homes. 

As their trip started to wind down, Athena was wakened by one of Leliana’s messengers tapping at the window. She opened the window and took the note that was tied to its foot. The note read: Message for the Inquisitor waiting at the Chantry. Athena left the note beside a peacefully (because it doesn’t happen all that often, it’s worth noting) sleeping Cullen, got dressed in a leather vest, red velvet shirt and leather pants. She left the house silently.

At the Chantry, Sparkler, Nightingale, and I greeted her. Which caused her to immediately pale and whisper, “Oh no.”

Leliana chuckled and quickly informed her, "No, the world is not ending. Skyhold is still standing. Bull and Josephine are at Skyhold. Where is the Commander?”

“He was sleeping,” Athena was still frozen to the spot. I don’t think she trusted Nightingale’s answers.

“Were you sleeping?” Sparkler asked, being nosy.

“I was, until a bird with a note tapped on the window. What are you three doing here?” She still did not come any further into the chantry.

“There’s been strange reports about a village south of here,” Leliana hedged, not wanting to say the real reason we were there.

“And we missed you,” Sparkler said. I chuckled.

“Leliana.” Athena’s tone of voice commanding her spymaster to not hedge.

Nightingale looked at us, “Can we have a moment?”

“Let’s go see what trouble you can find at sunrise,” I said to Dorian as we left. We ran into Curly not too far from the chantry.

“Oh no,” Cullen groaned upon seeing us.

“I’m wounded, Commander. One would think you and Athena would be happy to see us,” Dorian sighed dramatically.

“They haven’t had enough time to miss us yet,” I chuckled.

“Where’s Athena?” Cullen was uninterested in hearing anything from us.

“Still in the Chantry talking to Nightingale,” I answered. Curly took off at run hearing who it was.

“Do you get the feeling that we’re missing something?” Sparkler asked me.

“Yes, I do. Or Nightingale’s just that terrifying.”

Back inside the dimly lit chantry, Leliana and Athena continued their conversation. “I’ve received reports that there is an assassin after you. We’ve tracked them to the village south of here,” Leliana said as they both sat.

"Who's the assassin?" 

Cullen entered the chantry with Athena’s question and swore, “Maker’s breath.” Both Leliana and Athena looked upon hearing him. Athena shifted so he could sit down beside her.

“From what we can tell, a mage from Ostwick. What we can’t figure out is how she tracked you here. I think there may be a traitor among you. Do you know who the mage might be?” Leliana questioned.

“No idea. After the circles fell another mage and I set out together, but she was killed when Kern tried to take me captive,” Athena looked down at her clenched hands, fighting tears.

“Athena?” Leliana gently encouraged her to continue.

“The one story I had hoped I would never have to tell,” Athena looked away with tears falling from her violet eyes. Cullen took hold of one of her hands. 

“When Kern and his men tried to take me captive, Brenna was caught in the crossfire. Before I could heal her, I was knocked unconscious. When I woke, I guess they thought I was dead too, because I was laying beside her. She wasn’t breathing, there was no heart beat. One of the men saw that I was alive… He forced me to the ground. I pulled the dagger from his belt, stabbed him in the chest, and used my magic to blast him off of me… 

"Another person came at me with a weapon and I crushed him in an energy prison. A third tried, this time I was too forceful with my magic and blasted everyone. I ran… And I never stopped to check on anyone,” Athena finished with her voice choked with tears.

“Leliana?” Cullen asked with his request for privacy in that one word. Leliana nodded in understanding and silently left.

“I told you that you’re a better person than me,” Athena said quietly, not daring to look at him. Her guilt at killing people instead of healing them eating her alive.

“Athena,” Cullen was stern and lifted her chin so their eyes met, “You were defending yourself. You had every right to not check on them. And you had every right to fight and kill.”

“Did I have that right with Brenna though? She was killed because she was with me…” Athena laughed bitterly, “the story of my life.”

Cullen closed his eyes to hide the pain and anger he felt on her behalf. He gently pulled her close and held her, Speaking with barely more than a whisper, “Sometimes innocents get caught in a battle and no matter how much you want to, you can’t save them. You said yourself that she was already dead.”

Athena pulled away from Cullen, “Josie once told me a story of how she had to defend herself when she was a bard. When I told her that she had the right to defend herself and that it didn’t seem to matter to the young man if he killed her, she said that she felt like she was the last one to judge what would have become of the young man she killed. Brenna died because she was with me…” Athena choked back a sob, “My mother, Crystyna… They died protecting me, and…” she couldn’t continue because she was crying too hard.

Cullen held her and tightened his grip when she tried to pull away, whispering, “Don’t. I love you, nothing in your past will ever change that.” 

Athena broke then, her sobs heartrending. When the sobs and tears spent themselves to the occasional hiccup for Athena, Cullen went to the door to let Leliana back in. “Do you have a plan, Leliana?”

“Before we do anything, I would like to gather more information. It should only take a day or two. Athena, do you remember if Brenna had any one in her life that would hold a grudge?” Leliana asked as gently as she could.

Athena chuckled, bitterness still lacing her laugh, “We weren’t close. The only reason we were traveling together was because we were headed in a similar direction.” Athena stood and walked away from them, “If there had been one more day, we would have gone our separate ways.”

“Cullen, we’re going to need to question the soldiers that came with you,” Leliana said quietly.

“I know. Does Dorian and Varric know?” Cullen’s eyes never left Athena as she walked around.

“They don’t know about the assassin,” Nightingale answered.

“Tell them. They won’t let anything happen to her,” Cullen ordered quietly. Leliana nodded and left to track us down. Cullen walked over to Athena. When he went to put his arms around her, it was rewarded with her jumping, he whispered, “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“For?” The last thing he wanted or needed from her was an apology.

“For having a past that keeps interrupting our time together,” Athena’s tears threatened to overflow again.

“And I have a past that visits us on an almost nightly basis. At least with yours we can fight together,” Cullen caressed her cheek.

Athena’s tear filled eyes stared in to his brown ones, seeing nothing but love, she finally closed hers as a few tears started sliding down. With Curly and Duchess on the far side of the dimly lit Chantry (For lighting purposes, this Chantry was the worst,) there was a moment of uncertainty. Nightingale called out, “Commander?”

“Over here,” he called back. Leave it to them to somehow find the deepest, darkest corner of the place. They took a couple minutes in coming over so Athena could compose herself. Curly asked us to talk privately, “What did Leliana tell you?”

"That there's an assassin after her,” I was itching to pull out Bianca.

“Anything else?”

“Does it matter?” Sparkler asked.

“It’s someone from Ostwick Circle,” Cullen answered.

“Shit,” I breathed.

“She does not leave your sight,” Cullen ordered and then paused as he watched Athena and Leliana hug. “Try and get her to laugh.”

“Will do,” I can always get her to laugh.

“Is there a specific place you would like us to take her?” Dorian asked.

“My sister’s, but I don’t think she’ll let you.” Cullen thought, “Maybe…” He walked over to Duchess, “Athena, you and Mia have yet to play chess, now that she’s taught you how.”

Athena whirled on him, violet eyes blazing, “How can you even suggest such a thing?!”

“Because it’s the most defensible place I know,” Cullen remained calm. (I was impressed.)

“Absolutely not,” Athena turned and walked away from her lover. 

“Athena,” Cullen walked over to her, “I need to know that you’re somewhere safe. You can’t stay in the Chantry indefinitely.” 

“No, I refuse to put more people at risk because of me,” Athena was shaking in anger, fear, or guilt (she never told me, but I would bet it was all three.)

“You’re not going to stand in an open field where anyone can get to you,” Curly ordered and then said softer, “I can ask Mia to leave… She won’t, but I can ask.”

Cullen took Athena’s silence as a yes. He took hold of her hand before she could fight more, and swiftly left the chantry. Once we reached Mia’s house, Curly explained the situation, and asked his sister to leave. As predicted, Mia said no. 

Athena asked, “Since I’m the one being threatened, shouldn’t I be doing the questioning?”

Her question was greeted with a unanimous and resounding, “No!"

Darius walked over to us, as we were still standing outside (quite the random place to have a discussion about assassinations), “Telling the Inquisitor no. I thought only the Commander could do that, and he’s not very successful at it either.”

“Darius, don’t,” Cullen warned.

“Commander…” Leliana warned.

“Nightingale, it’s not Darius,” Athena argued, her patience already worn.

“Inquisitor, you don’t know that,” Leliana gave it right back.

“Why don’t we all go inside, so we’re not standing out in the open?” Mia asked, but we all knew it was an order.

Once inside, Cullen said quietly, “Athena’s right, Darius had the opportunity.”

“What opportunity?” Darius was throughly confused.

“There’s someone from Athena’s past that is trying to kill her, and they know she’s here,” Cullen explained.

“Maker’s breath,” Darius swore, “and you’re thinking one of the soldiers that came with us is at least informing this person.”

“He’s a quick one,” Sparkler commented, getting Athena to crack an almost smile. That almost smile didn’t go unnoticed, “There’s hope for the day yet.”

“Forgive me, but,” Mia looked straight at Darius, “weren’t you dating an apostate from this area several years ago?”

“I was. How do you know her?” Darius asked.

“She’s been trying to pass herself off as a healer,” Mia answered.

Darius laughed bitterly, “Brenna could barely control her magic when I knew her. My guess is that hasn’t changed.”

Athena went pale and weak on hearing the name. Cullen put an around her waist and had her sit, “Tell me about this Brenna.”

“There’s not much to tell. She showed up at Kirkwall after the blight. She went through her harrowing, barely survived it, and was kicked out about a year later. Our relationship continued until she broke up with me. She disappeared until she turned up here about a year ago,” Darius answered.

“What did she look like?” Athena’s voice was quiet. Too quiet for my liking.

“Tall, black hair that was usually kept to about shoulder length. She was very thin. From her harrowing she got a scar on her forehead, it looks like a star. Why do you ask?”

“Because she was at Ostwick,” Athena was so quiet that we barely heard her. 

“She couldn’t have, her family was exiled from the Free Marches,” Darius said.

“Unless she has a twin with the same exact scar, she was at Ostwick,” Athena looked down at her hands. She could only see Curly’s though.

“What about our… her daughter?” Darius corrected himself.

“She didn’t bring a child with her… And she didn’t care for the children already there. It doesn’t matter anyway, she died.”

“Athena, She’s not dead. Brenna’s the one I met the first day we were in South Reach. She lives in a little village about an hour’s ride from here,” Darius argued.

“Did you tell this Brenna that the Inquisitor would be here?” Leliana was still suspicious.

“I told her I was taking leave to meet our… Her daughter. In all the letters I wrote I never said anything about the Inquisitor or Commander. Not that they were read…” Darius was understandably bitter.

“What about what happened with that Lucius fellow? Demon in Val Royeaux, real person at Caer Oswin?” Sparkler questioned.

Athena got up and walked over to the window. Staring unseeing out of it, reliving the day that Brenna died. I asked, “Doesn’t the person have to be alive to pull something like that off?”

Their silence didn’t really answer my question. Mia returned with her own question, “Is it possible that Brenna was just unconscious when you saw her, Athena?”

“When I woke up from being unconscious. She had a head wound that was very severe…. One that no one would be able to survive from,” Athena whispered, her violet eyes haunted by awful memories. 

“If Darius’s Brenna is the same as the one Athena saw die… What is she?” I rhetorically asked, not wanting an answer. Thankfully, I didn’t get one.

“First let’s find out how this assassin found out that Athena is here. Are any of the soldiers from the village she lives in?” Nightingale asked.

“The only one I know of is Timson. Everyone else is from South Reach or have girlfriends here,” Darius answered.

“Then that’s where we start. Commander?” Leliana was anxious to get moving.

Cullen had walked over to Athena and gently turned her to face him. Guilt kept her from meeting his gaze. He gently tilted her chin up so he could look into her eyes, “I will be back as soon as I can. You are not to be left alone.” He whispered, “I love you.”

Athena closed her eyes then as the tears started flowing again, and whispered, “I love you, too.” 

Cullen kissed her and walked to the door, “Mia, beat Dorian at chess for me?”

Mia chuckled as she went over to take Athena’s hand and pull her to a chair, “You’re sitting beside me, dear.”

Darius followed Curly and Nightingale outside, “If it’s all right with you, Commander, I’d like to stay with the Inquisitor. It’s not that I think Varric and Dorian aren’t capable of protecting her, but it never hurts to have a strong arm.”

“Are you sure that’s wise?” Leliana still didn’t trust Darius. But she respected that he wanted to protect her friend.

"It’s fine with me, Darius.” Cullen waited until his second in command went inside to explain to Leliana, “On the trip here, I had taken ill. If Darius had wanted to he could have tried to kill both of us then… Not to mention the times Athena has been alone with him. We can trust him.”

“If you’re certain…” Leliana trailed off. She still got the sense that Darius was hiding something.

“I am. It’s not like you to be so protective,” Curly said as they walked to the barracks.

“Because of my choosing and old friend over Athena she almost died. It won’t happen again,” Leliana had an edge of guilt in her voice.

“And I should have went with you, but Athena doesn’t blame either one of us.” Cullen stopped to close the barracks door behind them and murmured, “now if only she’d stop blaming herself over this.”

“Agreed, Commander.”

They walked through the cramped barracks and came upon Johan first. Cullen asked, “Do you know where Recruit Timson is?”

"I believe he’s at the tavern. Everything okay, Commander?” Johan put down his mug of ale.

"There's someone trying to reach Timson, and we’d like to get the message to him,” Leliana answered.

“If it’s from that crazy ex-girlfriend of his, burn it,” Johan said angrily.

“Oh?” Leliana encouraged him.

“He’s shown me some of her letters to him. She calls him names, says he’s worthless, and every single letter has pages on the Inquisitor,” he took a swig of his ale.

“Do you know where he keeps these letters?” Cullen asked.

“Follow me,” Johan stood and took them to Timson’s belongings. The letters were laying on his bed, “After she tried to foist her kid off on him, I told Timson to burn them. The kid’s ten years old, Timson couldn’t have been more than ten when she was born.” 

"You wouldn't happen to know this girlfriend's name?" Leliana asked as Cullen picked up the letters.

“Brenna, and she’s almost as crazy as that Corypheus. She claims she’s a healer and then in the next breath she claims she came back from the dead. I know the Inquisitor’s a healer. I’ve seen her do it. When she’s healing the magic glows gold, and the person… Or animal, is healed. When Brenna does it, the air glows red and talks, and quite often the person ends up worse. Just like that red lyrium we kept running in to,” Johan likes to talk.

Cullen looked up from the letters, “Did Timson ever tell you how they met?”

Johan thought, “I don’t know where, but he said that when he met her she was at least dying or already dead. He was digging a grave for her. A red light surrounded her and she was healed. They’ve had a love/hate relationship ever since. Timson thought the Inquisition would be a way to get over her, but she found him and started writing to him. He would receive several letters a day. The ones the Commander is holding are just the ones since we left Skyhold.”

“Did he write back to her?” Leliana asked.

“At times. He’s been trying since we got here to break it off with her.”

“Thank you, Johan. For now, keep this conversation between us?” Cullen gathered the letters to take with him.

“Sure, Commander,” Johan laid down on his bed.

Once Nightingale and Curly left the barracks she asked, “Did you want to talk to Timson now?”

“I think we should read the letters first. It sounds as though he may be an innocent party in all this as well.”

“How do you want to explain this to Athena?” 

“Privately,” Cullen opened the door to his sister’s home.

They heard, upon entering, Sparkler griping, “First Wicked Grace and now chess. How do you convince these people to teach you?!”

Athena chuckled, “I’m in love with a man that has a competitive streak?”

I chuckled, “Duchess, that has nothing to do with it. We all get immense enjoyment out of you getting Curly to blush.”

Curly sighed, “Of course everyone gets enjoyment out of my embarrassment.” Athena smiled at him as he came over to kiss her, and whispered, “There’s the smile I love to see.”

Athena blushed, “Did you find out anything?”

“We’ll talk about it later.”

Athena sighed in frustration, “Why do I get the feeling it’s not good news?”

“We will talk about it later,” Cullen repeated.

“Cullen, Leliana, why don’t you go eat?” Mia asked… But didn’t ask. Stranger still, Nightingale listened as Mia turned her attention to Duchess, “Athena, would you like to play again?” 

“No, thank you. I think it’s time for someone else to defeat Dorian,” Athena stood.

“Where do you think you’re going, Duchess?” I asked.

“The garderobe,” she was daring me to say that I was going with her.

“I’ll stand outside the door,” I winked at her.

“It’s right off the kitchen, that’s not necessary,” Athena grumbled. I nodded my head in agreement, waited until she turned around, and followed her. 

After Athena closed the door Nightingale whispered, “For the love of Andraste, Varric, let the woman go to the bathroom.”

“I wanted a cookie,” I was completely unrepentant.

“She’s going to kill you if she sees you,” Leliana said. Cullen smirked.

“Well worth it, Nightingale,” I winked at her and went back to the sitting room without a cookie. (If you can’t get a person to laugh, annoy them. It works every time.)

"I'm going to kill him," Athena said as she opened the door.

“You heard?” Leliana took a sip of her drink to hide her smile.

“The door isn’t that thick,” Athena glowered at Cullen who was trying not to chuckle, and failing. She accused, “This is your doing.”

“I wanted you protected,” Much like I was, Cullen was completely unrepentant for the watchdogs Duchess now had. He smirked, “I didn’t bring them from Skyhold.”

“Leliana didn’t tell them that I was to not be left alone,” Athena walked over to him. Curly shrugged in response, no where close to apologizing.

"Athena, at Skyhold, or on the road, Varric and Dorian were always at your side. I know you trust them implicitly.”

“It gets awkward when your cousin and his new friend want to watch you undress,” Athena said, exasperated.

Cullen’s smugness ended very quickly and he drew out, “Why?”

“They took your orders literally,” Athena complained.

"Why did you need to change your clothes?” Curly was a little alarmed.

Athena blushed, “I was helping Mia make something… And now I understand why Josie barricades me from the kitchen.”

“It was your first time baking. You’ll get better,” Mia encouraged, loud enough to make it in to the kitchen.

“Andraste preserve me,” Athena whispered, closing her eyes.

“Did you spill something?” Nightingale asked.

“Spill? More like a chocolate and flour explosion… All over the kitchen,” Athena turned bright red. Cullen and Leliana started laughing. Athena noticed the letters on the table by Cullen’s plate, “What are those?”

“Letters,” Leliana answered.

“I can see that,” Athena sat beside Cullen. Before she could pick one up, he placed a hand on them, stopping her.

"Wait until I am done eating, and I will tell you everything,” Cullen ordered.

“Alone?” Athena had a hint of desperation in her voice.

Cullen stopped eating and caressed her cheek, “Yes, alone. However, the letters stay with Leliana until after we talk.” Athena nodded in agreement. “Have you eaten today?”

“I wasn’t given a choice,” Athena griped.

“Good,” Curly smirked and went back to his meal. 

“We should hand out small stacks of the letters to get them read faster,” Leliana suggested.

“Good idea,” Cullen finished eating. He held out a hand for Athena as he stood, “Ready?” 

Athena eagerly took his hand and smiled at him, “yes.” 

They walked through the sitting room and started going up the stairs. Sparkler noticed, “Not joining us?”

Cullen shook his head, to which Darius responded, “But Athena’s cousin is so easy to torment!”

“When you said Dorian’s new friend…?” Cullen asked.

“Varric was in the water closet and Mia was cleaning up the mess I made,” Athena answered. Cullen groaned causing Athena to chuckle, “Don’t worry, they only had eyes for each other.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow at her as Dorian and Darius yelled, “We do not.”

Athena shook her head and followed Curly into their room. I chuckled, “Who wants to bet we won’t be seeing them for the rest of the night?”

"I don't think I'll take that bet,” Dorian answered as we heard the soft click of a door closing.

Cullen sighed heavily as he took off his armor. Athena was immediately concerned, “Cullen?”

Before he answered he hugged her, “Long day.”

“You’re not in pain?” She melted in to his embrace.

“No, I’m not,” he said softly. Cullen kissed her and carried her to bed…. They didn’t get to talk until much later.

After they made love, they both fell asleep. Athena kept having nightmares, so she gave up on trying to sleep and went to stand by a window, staring out of it. The rain on the glass matching her tears.

Cullen reached out in his sleep for Athena. Unable to find her in bed he sat bolt upright, wide awake. When he saw her standing by the rain streaked window, Cullen sighed, “Couldn’t sleep?” 

Athena shook her head, not trusting her voice. Curly got out of bed and walked over to her. He saw that she was crying and hugged her. Cullen desperately wished he could take away her pain and guilt.

When the tears slowed to a trickle, Athena laid her heart bare, “All day I’ve been thinking that I am the same as Blackwall… Rainier, and I judged him.”

“Athena, there is a major difference between fighting for one’s life and giving an order to massacre a family. He lied to his troops, and took on another man’s name. You’ve done none of those things except fight for your life and save Thedas. The two aren’t comparable,” Cullen said softly.

"Innocents still died," Athena whispered.

“Come sit with me,” Cullen took hold of her hands and they walked over to the bed. He told her everything Johan had told him, finishing with, “It appears that the Brenna you knew is still alive.”

“I guess we should read those letters now,” Athena responded quietly, letting all that Curly told her sink in.

“It’s the middle of the night…” He nuzzled her neck.

“I’m not going to be able to sleep after all that,” Athena tilted her head so Cullen could continue kissing her neck.

“The letters will keep until morning,” Cullen said softly. Trailing kisses up and down her neck.

“You’re avoiding work?”

“You’re very distracting,” he said as they slid further back on the bed, kissing each other.

After their passion was sated, Athena half sat up to look at him, “Cullen, I…” She paused, “Thank you.”

He raised a golden eyebrow at her, “You never have to thank me for what we just did.”

“I’m… Not,” Athena blushed. She closed her eyes so she could say what she was thinking, “Thank you for everything you did today and for still loving me.”

Cullen propped himself up with an elbow and caressed her cheek with his free hand, “How many times have you seen me not at my best?”

Athena shrugged her shoulders, almost whispering, “That’s different.” 

“No, it’s not. After I told you what happened at the Fereldan Circle, you could have walked away and I wouldn’t have blamed you. Or numerous times before and since. But, you’re still at my side.”

Athena knocked Curly back down to the bed with the way she threw herself at him, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen held her quietly and slowly drifted off to sleep. Once Athena was sure he was asleep, she got out of bed and grabbed one of the books her father left with her. The one she chose was about lyrium, the other two were about her family history and Magic. She read until sunrise and had to stop because Cullen was calling out in his sleep, “Let me go!” And “Leave me!”

Athena marked where she left off in her book and put it on the floor, then she started whispering to him of how much she loved him, how happy she was that she got to meet his family, and how she couldn’t wait to marry him. As usual her words were able to pull him from that dark corner of his mind and calm him. When Curly opened his eyes, Athena smiled, “Morning.”

He kissed her in greeting and asked, “Were you able to go back to sleep?”

“No, I read,” she pulled the book up from the floor and put it on her lap.

"You picked the one you don’t use?”

“Brenna did at one point, and I wanted to see if it had anything on how to make the symptoms of lyrium withdrawal less painful,” Athena’s fingers played with a corner of the large book.

“Find anything out?” Cullen asked.

“Not yet, it started off with the history of lyrium.” Athena remembered what had them seek privacy last night, “Should we go see about those letters now?”

Cullen chuckled, “I don’t think Mia’s going to allow us to do anything until we have breakfast.”

“Unlike Josie, I can read and eat. In fact, I’m quite skilled at it,” Athena smiled.

Once they were dressed they came downstairs and Athena made a bee line for the letters. Leliana got in between her and the letters, “No.”

“That bad?” Cullen was worried.

“Worse,” Leliana answered.

“If I’m not allowed to question anyone, and I’m not allowed to read what this woman is saying… Am I supposed to look into a crystal ball to find a way to defeat her?” Athena griped. I had to fight a smile at that.

“Why don’t we wait to hear what Leliana has to say before reading them?” Cullen tried to be a voice of reason. 

Athena nodded. She wanted to get this over with. But, when it wasn’t a personal thing, she got facts and advice from those she trusted.

Everyone took a seat and waited patiently for Leliana to begin, “If her letters are to be believed, she was kicked out of Kirkwall because she was using red lyrium.” 

“That can't be," I was, understandably, quite shocked.

“She doesn’t say where she found it, just that she used it. Somehow, she kept using it at Ostwick.”

“The only times I saw her at the circle was at night and on the weekends. My mother did say that she was working on some sort of project that her family needed,” Athena filled in.

“That explains why she could use red lyrium without anyone catching on.” The pieces were coming together for Nightingale, “Brenna said that she had cast a spell on Kern to make him fall in love with her because she was jealous of the attention he paid you, and that she was the one that set up the attempt to take you captive, among other things.”

“What other things?” Athena asked.

“She hated you and was willing to do anything to see you hurt, including kill those you cared about.” Leliana paused, not wanting to hurt Duchess, “According to Brenna, the attempted abduction was supposed to be your death, but she underestimated your powers. After that, she couldn’t figure out a way to get to you until Timson joined the Inquisition.”

“So, everything was Brenna and Kern? Not Bernard? And how do we defeat her? With Samson Dagna created a rune to make his armor weak… Dagna’s not here,” Athena started pacing.

“If she’s drinking the stuff, she’ll eventually turn into a statue,” I quipped to hide the shudder of remembering how Meredith turned to stone.

“She hasn’t yet,” Athena responded quietly.

"Athena, why don’t you see if there’s anything in the book you were reading about red lyrium? Darius, would you mind getting Timson and take him to the Chantry?” Cullen suggested.

"Not at all, Commander,” Darius answered.

"I’m going to go along with the Knight-Captain," Leliana followed Darius to the door. 

Athena went up to get her book without anyone following her. I had to ask, “Not following her, Curly?”

“She’s not as emotional anymore.”

“So, you do trust her,” I teased.

“Of course I-“ Curly half groaned and half growled, “Yesterday we didn’t know what we were dealing with and she was feeling guilty. Guilt leads to decisions that never turn out well.”

Athena came back down with her book, “Does this mean I can go to the bathroom without a guard?”

Cullen chuckled and kissed her, “Yes.”

“Did you hear that, Varric?” The sweetness of her voice did nothing to hide the irritation she was still feeling about my following her around yesterday.

“Yes, Duchess,” I griped.

“I need to go,” Cullen said softly as he caressed his love’s cheek.

“Would you like me to come with you?” She gazed into his warm brown eyes.

“For once, I get to protect you. Stay here, find out all you can on red lyrium and Brenna,” Cullen smiled at his love’s blush. 

“You know, Duchess, I’m surprised you didn’t argue with Curly about what he said,” I commented.

“Why would I argue with him when he’s right?” Athena asked, confused. Cullen got a very smug look as he left.

“Oh, dear girl, you never tell men that they’re right,” Mia said, “especially my brother.”

“Why not?” 

“Because he will be impossible to live with for quite some time now,” Mia answered, “and before you get lost in that book, you need to eat.”

“Yes, Mia,” Athena agreed… (Now don’t get me wrong, I love Duchess, she is an amazing, kind, and funny woman… But for as long as I have known she never simply agrees, especially when being told to eat….)

“What did Curly do to you last night?” I asked, incredulous.

“Nothing unusual, why?” Athena asked.

“Are you certain of that, Cousin?” Sparkler chimed in.

“Anytime we tell you that you need to eat, I’m told that you’re not hungry, or you’re too busy, and then Sparkler has to threaten to freeze you…”

Athena shrugged, “Mia’s a better cook.”

“Ruffles is not going to be happy to hear that,” I quipped, Dorian laughed.

Athena laughed, “Josie doesn’t cook… And there aren’t chocolate chip cookies at Skyhold.”

I couldn’t help but laugh, “That’s why you’re eating more here. You have a weakness. Does Curly know?”

“Yes?” Athena was suspicious.

“Good, I’m sure word has already been sent back to Skyhold,” I grinned. Athena sighed and started eating her breakfast. 

Sparkler questioned, “Were you two making cookies yesterday?”

Mia chuckled softly, “No. Cullen used to have a weakness for a specific type of cake. I was hoping we could try again today?”

Athena put down her fork and looked at Mia as if she had lost it, “Didn’t I make enough of a mess yesterday?”

Mia laughed, “I swear to you, today will be easier.”

“I think I should write down word for word what happens in that kitchen today,” I teased.

“Don’t you dare!” Athena looked like she was ready to bolt.

“Relax, Duchess, I won’t.”

After Athena finished eating, the ladies disappeared in to the kitchen. Cullen’s sister has infinite patience.


	28. Chapter 28

Curly (who was still smiling) walked into the Chantry. Leliana saw him and warned quietly so Timson couldn’t hear, “Going in with a smile that big is not going to lend itself to a successful interrogation.”

Cullen chuckled, “Timson has seen me smile before.” 

“Commander,” Darius nodded at Cullen.

“Thank you, Knight-Captain,” Curly dismissed Darius and turned his attention to Timson. “Timson, what can you tell me of a mage named Brenna?”

“I’ve been trying to break up with her since I joined the Inquisition months ago. She’s completely obsessed with the Inquisitor,” Timson answered.

“Why?” Leliana asked.

“Something about an old love interest and I made the mistake of saying how beautiful and kind the Inquisitor is in one of my letters. Ever since, it’s been nothing but her trying to get information out of me. I’m ashamed to admit that she was successful. I thought it was just jealousy until I saw her, she glows red now and it’s only getting worse.”

“How did she get information out of you?” Leliana questioned.

“Sometimes spells, most of her letters would make me so angry that I’d tell her something just to shut her up… It never worked though.” Timson sounded defensive. Cullen couldn’t figure out why.

“You would tell her something about the Inquisitor, and she would dig for more information? Does she have any weaknesses?” Cullen asked.

“Yes. I know she’s in a terrible amount of pain from the lyrium she’s using. It may just be a ploy to get me to feel sympathy for her, but every time I’ve seen Brenna, she’s become weaker. Last time I saw her, she acted as though she could barely stand,” Timson answered.

“When was that?” Leliana weaved in and out of the dim light in the chantry.

“Two days ago. Her eyes were very red, and her fingernails looked like the red lyrium we ran into during the war.” Timson paused, “I’m guessing there’s more to this than jealousy?”

“Didn’t you read the letters she sent you?” Leliana found that very hard to believe.

“I read the first paragraph, got irritated, threw them in my trunk, and I forgot about them… until I unpacked,” Timson sounded sheepish.

“And you didn’t read them then?” Cullen felt like there was something off about Timson’s story, but he couldn’t point it out. That feeling grew every time Timson answered.

“No Ser, I was planning on burning them.” Timson sounded far too innocent to be believable.

“In all the conversations you had with her, she never said anything about killing the Inquisitor?” Leliana asked, her bard senses tingling.

“Not that I recall, but some of my memories with her are fuzzy.”

“Fuzzy how?” Cullen wondered at what game Timson was playing.

“I remember being with her, but nothing of what we said or did. It feels like just waking from a dream.”

“Do you have anymore questions, Commander?” Nightingale knew they weren’t going to get anything else.

“Not at present,” Cullen narrowed his gaze on the young man.

“Commander?” Timson sounded nervous.

Yes?” Cullen stopped pacing and turned to face the recruit.

“What’s going to happen to Brenna?” Timson paused, “and me?”

“If Brenna contacts you, I want to know immediately. If you want to have any hope of staying with the Inquisition, you’ll stay away from her,” Cullen was curt.

“I understand, Commander,” Timson saluted and sat down on a chantry pew.

After they closed the door and started walking away from the small chantry, Leliana chastised, “That was lenient?”

“Do you think I’m not going to have him watched?” Cullen asked.

“Sometimes you can be hard to read…” Leliana blushed.

Cullen chuckled, “Athena should be here for this.”

“Why?” 

Before Curly could respond Darius saw them and joined the walk back to Mia’s. Cullen ordered, “I want Timson watched without knowing that he’s being watched. Leliana do you have people that can help with that?”

“Yes, Commander,” Leliana responded.

Before Leliana could go do Curly’s bidding, he smirked and teased, “In answer to your question, you were blushing, Leliana.”

“I’m a bard, Commander, we do not blush,” Nightingale griped as she left. 

Cullen laughed, and turned to Darius, “Take Timson back to the barracks and watch him until Leliana’s people show up. I’ll send Dorian to assist you.”

“Yes, Commander,” Darius went in to the chantry.

**

On the walk back, Cullen was amazed at how well he had been feeling lately. Maybe Athena is right and Mia’s cooking is better, he thought. A broad smile lit up his face as he thought of his life, he truly didn’t know where he would be without her. Certainly not as happy or as at peace. They were feelings he quite enjoyed, and he didn’t want them to end anytime soon. 

It was a short walk back and as he entered sister’s house, he was greeted with the sight of Athena curled up (as much as one can with a book that’s half the size of you,) with the lyrium book, and Mia, Sparkler, and I playing Wicked Grace, “Maker’s breath, is there anyone you won’t teach that game to? Dorian, can you go to the barracks and help Darius?”

Sparkler smiled and left without complaint. I’m going to have to pester him later.

I chuckled, “With Duchess having her nose in that book most of the day, we had to do something.”

Athena looked up, “What did you learn?”

“Timson verified what Johan told us and gave us a few more details…” Cullen trailed off.

“Cullen?” Athena marked where she was at in the book and closed it.

“There were some things he said that seemed off,” Cullen sat beside her.

“Like?” Athena asked. I chuckled, recognizing her tone as one of her thinking she was pulling teeth. Which rewarded me with a glare from her. 

“He said he didn’t read the letters Brenna sent him, and he kept saying how weak she was getting. Timson also claimed that he didn’t know anything about her threatening your life,” Cullen said quietly.

“If she’s taken it for as long as we suspect, shouldn’t she be getting stronger?” Athena asked rhetorically.

“Timson did say that it could be just a ploy to get sympathy,” Mia handed Curly a plate of food for which he nodded his thanks, “What did you find out?”

“That red lyrium’s been around a lot longer than Varric thought and there’s all sorts of different potions to use to weaken it. According to the book, once it’s ingested, they’re living on borrowed time.”

“Anything we can use here?” Cullen asked.

Athena chuckled, “Mia has assured me that anything we need she can get. I’m starting to think Leliana has competition.”

“Speaking of Nightingale, where is she?” I asked.

“I wanted her to have someone watch Timson… Or she could be plotting revenge…” Curly trailed off.

“For?” I asked (my turn to pull teeth.)

“Me,” he grinned.

“She’s not allowed to kill you before we’re married,” Athena teased.

“You have been spending too much time with Mia,” Curly sighed as Mia sat a little straighter and smirked, proud to draw Duchess a little more out of her shell (we all take pride in that.) Cullen continued, “I somehow managed to get her to blush.”

“How?” I didn’t think anyone could get Nightingale to blush.

“She thought I was being too lenient on Timson. When I told her what my plans were, she blushed and said that at times I’m hard to read,” Cullen smugly answered.

“Leliana, who knows all, said that you’re hard to read? Is she ill?” Athena asked.

“I am not ill. It was a momentary lapse in judgement, it won’t happen again, and I don’t blush,” Nightingale complained, coming in the door.

I can’t wait to tell Josie!” Athena was giddy with the pink now staining her spymaster’s cheeks.

With deadly accuracy Leliana threw a small pillow at Athena, “Don’t you dare!”

Athena smiled mischievously and changed the subject, “Dorian didn’t return with you?”

“It seemed he and the Knight-Captain had plans.” Leliana was still miffed.

“But Dorian’s been courting someone…” Athena trailed off as realization dawned.

“For over a year.” I finished. I wondered if I should take bets on who gets to ask Sparkler first.

Athena looked at me, “Do you think? How would they have kept it secret for this long?’

“All questions that need to be asked, Duchess.” I smiled at her.

Cullen had taken his plate in to the kitchen and saw the cake Athena and Mia made. He took a piece and sat down beside Athena again, prompting Mia to say, “Athena made that.”

“No, I didn’t,” Athena was just as quick. 

“You helped,” Mia smiled at her. 

“Helping is a bit strong for reading the recipe,” Athena argued, blushing. 

I chuckled, “I knew I should have written down what happened in that kitchen today.”

“Another explosion?” Cullen asked after swallowing a bite of the cake.

“No,” Athena’s blush grew. 

“If you hadn’t gotten nervous, you would have been fine,” Mia remarked softly.

“You were nervous? Over baking?” Leliana asked.

“Yes,” Athena said… I didn’t think her cheeks could bloom any further, but they did.

“Why?” Cullen was confounded. His lady love has a fear of graveyards, now nervous to be baking... Why hadn’t he learned this about her before? (Wars have a way of getting in the way, Curly.)

“I’ve never cooked in a kitchen before,” Athena said quietly.

“And Ruffles won’t let you in the one at Skyhold,” I chuckled.

“Not even to get my own snacks,” Athena griped which had us all laughing, “If circles were still around I would love to take her to one, just for a couple hours around a meal.”

"We don’t need another rebellion on our hands,” Cullen chuckled.

Athena laughed, “At the very least the circles would have better food.”

“Josie has enough to deal with at Skyhold, and you being picky,” Leliana teased.

“I am not picky! I just really like chocolate chip cookies,” Athena blushed.

“Is there a story to this?” I asked.

“No, I just like them. I always have.”

“Have we actually found something normal about you?” I teased. I was enjoying seeing our lovers so relaxed, even though there’s an assassin after Duchess. It was as though the world had been saved, or something.

"I'm normal in other ways," she shot back.

“You can’t bake,” I chuckled.

“The last time you tried to make dinner, you burned down the entire camp,” Athena fired back.

“That’s only because Sparkler was supposed to be helping with the fire,” I was trying not to blush. (This blushing thing is contagious.)

“Varric…” Athena warned, knowing I was lying.

“What?! It’s true!”

“I was talking to Dorian when his tent went up in smoke. And that’s not fair to blame him for something he didn’t do,” Athena chastised me.

Curly sighed and looked at Athena, “The more I hear of your travels, the more I’m glad I was stuck in Skyhold.”

“Come on now, Curly, a few burned down tents didn’t ruin the fun we had.” I smirked.

“It’s more that Athena would have a lot less friends,” Curly looked at me.

"We go back further than you knowing Duchess. That has to count for something,” I chuckled.

“Cullen, if you hurt Varric you’d be out of an extremely over protective bodyguard for me.” Athena teased and wondered where her cousin and his lover were, “I can’t imagine Dorian wanting to spend the night in the barracks…”

“You’re right, they should be back by now… What are you thinking?” Cullen asked her, the look she gave him answered his question, “That they went after Brenna without us.”

“No, they’re smarter than that,” Leliana hoped.

“Darius has a history with her… And Dorian wouldn't want him to go by himself,” Athena looked worriedly at Cullen who had stood and started to pace.

“And because those two may have a relationship already…” I trailed off.

"That and they both adore Athena. I shouldn't have sent him to watch over Timson,” Cullen groaned, “I should go to the barracks to see if Timson is still there.”

“I’ll go, stay here with Athena,” Leliana offered. Cullen nodded in thanks as Nightingale left.

While Cullen and Leliana were talking Athena and I disappeared to get armor and our weapons. 

Curly was not happy when he saw Athena dressed for battle, “Absolutely not.”

“Cullen, she wants me. I will provide a very good distraction for her, and unlike Darius and Dorian, I’ll have help.” She kissed him then and said softly, “This isn’t anything new.”

“What about the potions?” Mia asked.

Athena smiled sadly at her, “There’s no time… And yes, you can both yell at them later, provided I don’t kill them first.”

Cullen half heartedly chuckled at that and went to get his armor on. Leliana came back right as Curly was walking down the stairs and informed us that while Timson was still at the barracks, Dorian and Darius were no longer there. 

Before we left Athena gave instructions on what kind of magic she would be using. Mia interrupted her, “Athena, if this is for me, I’m not going and I highly doubt the other three need the reminder.” 

“It’s what I do. Right, Varric?” Athena asked me.

“Every. Damn. Battle. And especially after she learns something new,” I griped.

“You don’t sound happy about that,” Cullen said.

“At first, I was appreciative, and I’m not saying that this little talk is a bad thing… I’ve just heard it so often that I could recite it in my sleep,” I complained.

“Next time, stay home,” Athena teased.

“Not on your life, Duchess,” I winked at her. 

The lovers kissed, and whispered hasty “I love yous” and we rode hard for the village where Brenna lived. Brenna wasn’t hard to find considering Darius was pounding on her door screaming, “Let me in!”

Dorian looked back as he heard the horses and said, “Darius, the Commander and Inquisitor are here.”

Darius stopped yelling, but he didn’t move away from the door. We met Dorian half way, and he explained, “There’s a little girl in the house and we’ve heard things crashing about in there for several minutes. Athena, there’s what looks to be a red lyrium giant in there.”

Everyone else groaned as we had fought more than our fair share of them. “Has she responded to anything?”

“We’ve heard a woman’s voice screaming ‘no’,” Sparkler answered.

“It was Brenna’s voice,” Darius said softly.

“Then she hasn’t turned completely,” Athena sighed in relief.

“That’s a good thing?” Leliana asked hopefully.

“We can use that. Varric you stay with Darius and Dorian, get that door open as soon as Brenna gets outside,” Athena ordered.

“And what are you going to do?” I asked.

“I’m going to lure her out and as far away as I can,” Athena said.

“And we’ll make sure she doesn’t fall back,” Cullen responded.

When everyone was in position, Athena called out, “Brenna, it’s Inquisitor Athena Trevelyan. I heard that you are looking for me, and that you have been trying to kill me for years. Here’s your chance.”

A large roar came from inside the house, and as Athena had hoped, Brenna crashed through the back of the house. Athena ran to get Brenna further away from the house with Cullen and Dorian following behind the red, beast-like, thing. When Athena felt she was far enough away to not harm anyone except her intended target she cast barrier and started attacking the thing used to be known as Brenna. 

Once the little girl was safe with Darius, Sparkler and I joined the battle. The odds were not in Brenna’s favor, but she put up a tough fight, knocking all of us around several times, it seemed as though Athena was getting hit the most (that’s nothing unusual.) 

When Brenna was defeated everyone headed back to where Darius and the little girl were… Except Athena, who noticed that Brenna was still breathing and knelt down beside the dying woman, “All of this over Kern? Love doesn’t destroy people.”

“No, Bernard was my father, too,” Brenna whispered, gasping for air, “... He left when you were born…” And Brenna gasped her last.

Athena closed Brenna’s eyes and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

Cullen had noticed that Athena wasn’t following, so he had turned back and heard everything that was said. She looked up at him with tears in her violet eyes, “She deserves to be buried.” 

Curly nodded his assent, helped her up, and kissed her, “Ready?”

“There’s a little girl that we need to see to first.”

Cullen wrapped an arm around her waist, “Always thinking of others.”

When they made their way to us, Athena was limping and pale. I looked at Curly and he nodded that he knew. They walked over to where the little girl and Darius were sitting. Athena saw that the little girl’s hands were glowing, but introduced herself first, “Hello, my name is Athena. Would you like to go for a walk with me? I promise no harm will come to you.”

The little girl looked up at her with tears in her big blue eyes and nodded her head. Athena smiled at her and held out her hand, leaning on her staff. The little girl stood and took Athena’s hand and as they walked away we heard Athena ask, “What’s your name?”

We barely heard the little girl answer, “Ana.”

I walked over to Cullen, “Not worried about Duchess’ injuries?”

“It’s pointless to try right now,” he watched Athena’s every move.

Athena, talking to calm the little girl, asked, “How old are you, Ana?”

“Ten.”

“When did your powers first start?” 

“Two years ago,” Ana had tears in her eyes.

Athena smiled at Ana, “I think we’ve walked far enough.” Athena got on her knees in front of Ana and laid down her staff, “Your powers scare you, don’t they?” Ana nodded with tears overflowing. 

“My powers scared me, too.” Athena said softly, “Would it be okay with you if I helped you release all the magic that’s built up inside?” 

Ana looked at her in shock. Athena’s smile was one of understanding and Ana whispered, “Yes.”

“I need you to put your back to me, and I’m going to hold your wrists. When I use magic it always sparkles, does it do that for you?” Ana nodded as she turned away from Athena, who continued her gentle instruction, “I want you to imagine that your body is filled up with those sparkles and then I want you to imagine them leaving through your fingers. You can close your eyes if it helps.”

Ana’s hands started glowing really bright. Athena cast barrier around them and positioned Ana’s hands so the magic would shoot up in to the sky, “Ana, I want you to breathe in and then I want you to breath out very slowly. As you breathe out the magic is going to flow through your fingers and into the sky, and nothing will be hurt. Ready?” 

Ana nodded and started to breathe out just as Athena said. For several minutes, the skies had several more stars. Ana’s hands stopped glowing and she came very close to knocking Athena over with her hug. Athena chuckled softly, “Go back to Darius.” Athena waited until Ana had started to run back before she turned her back to everyone and became ill.

Cullen ran over to her, alarmed that the battle made her ill. He waited until she wasn’t retching anymore and as he helped her up he asked, “Are you all right?”

“I think so?” Athena questioned herself.

“That’s not very reassuring,” Cullen wrapped a protective arm around her waist after he bent down to get Athena’s staff. She shrugged her shoulders in response, just as confused by her sudden illness as he was. Shaking his head at her he asked, “Should we be expecting fireworks at Skyhold now?”

Athena chuckled, “Skyhold’s seen it before.” 

“Your mother’s journal?” Curly asked and she nodded. As they slowly walked toward us he requested, “can we see to your injuries and sudden illness now?”

Athena laughed, “I feel fine… Now, and yes.”

“New trick?” Sparkler asked (only Curly noticed Athena get ill).

“My mother wrote about it in her journal,” Athena smiled.

“Maybe I should read it sometime,” Dorian said brightly.

Darius was holding a now sleeping Ana, “Thank you, Inquisitor. I don’t know what I would’ve done….”

“You don’t need to thank me, I’m glad she’s safe,” after speaking Athena sighed wearily.

Cullen looked down at her, worried, “Are you going to be all right to ride?”

Athena smiled weakly at him, “I’ll be fine. Are we going back to Mia’s?”

“She would be upset with us if we didn’t,” Cullen lifted her up on her horse. He had a moment of indecision on deciding if he should ride his own horse or ride Athena’s, and then she wobbled. He tied his horse’s reigns to Athena’s horse’s saddle and mounted behind his love. Grateful for his support, Athena leaned against him too tired to speak.

Before we left, Leliana organized for someone to bury Brenna and we left much slower than we arrived. The sun was rising as we walked in to Mia’s house. Mia directed Darius and Ana to the unoccupied room. Unfortunately for Curly and Duchess they had to answer several questions about the battle from Mia before they could rest. In Mia’s defense she did wrap Athena’s ankle.   
“Is the little girl all right?” 

“She’s physically fine,” Athena answered.

“Cullen, are you injured as well?” Mia continued her interrogation.

“I’m fine. If your curiosity is satisfied for now, I think we could all use some sleep,” Cullen was irritable because of lack of sleep and worry for a still pale Athena.

“Yes, of course, I’m sorry,” Mia blushed.

“It’s all right, Mia,” Cullen said as an apology. He shouldn’t take his tiredness out on his sister and picked Athena up.

“I can walk,” Athena mumbled, half asleep.

“No you can’t,” Cullen said softly as he walked up the stairs. He laid Athena gently on the bed. She reached out for him, which had him chuckle and whisper, “I’ll be there in a minute, it’s not very comfortable to sleep in armor.” 

Once armor-less he crawled into bed with Athena and she snuggled up to him and whispered, “I love you.”

Cullen yawned and whispered back, “I love you, too.” And they both fell asleep.

**

Athena groaned as she was wakened by yelling. Her stomach felt unsettled, so she laid still for a couple minutes before moving. She reached out for Cullen who wasn’t there and she sighed, gingerly moving to get dressed in a blue velvet top, black leather vest, and tan pants. She went down stairs and out in the garden to see what was going on. Only to be surprised that Rosalie was the one doing the yelling, “Cullen, you can’t!”

“Rosalie, he lied,” Cullen crossed his arms and sighed when he saw Athena, “you shouldn’t be out of bed.”

“I heard arguing,” Athena still looked pale and sat on a bench beside the house.

“Athena, Cullen is right,” Mia said. Athena just sat and waited patiently for them to explain the arguing.

“Are you ill?” Rosalie asked.

“No, Rosalie, I’m just sore,” Athena smiled weakly at her.

“From what?” Rosalie pried.

Cullen shook his head at Athena, which confused her. But Athena listened to him, saying slowly, “I’d rather not say…”

“You too, Athena?” Rosalie asked, sounding hurt.

“I still have no idea why you’re arguing…” Athena trailed off.

“She wants me to give Timson a second chance, and she doesn’t want to say why,” Cullen interrupted his love, exasperated.

“Have you told her why you don’t want to give him a second chance?” Athena was already not feeling well and all the circuitous nonsense was making her head hurt.

“He lied.”

“You know that for certain?” Athena asked.

“Yes,” Cullen said softly. After all, he wasn't angry at Duchess.

“She’s your sister, you should at least tell her why you’re making the decision,” Athena gently chastised.

“I haven’t made any decisions yet. I just don’t understand why Rosalie would ask me to keep him when she doesn’t know him,” Cullen looked at Rosalie.

“I never said that I didn’t know him…” Rosalie grumbled.

Athena sighed, not having the patience for this, “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

Rosalie’s green eyes filled with tears, “It wasn’t until Geordan left. He was so sweet when I went to see Brenna, he warned me not to go to her. Which I listened to and we kept talking… I fell for him.”

“What about Geordan?” Mia asked.

“He’s not coming back, Mia. He left me,” Rosalie choked back a sob.

“He left you?! How can that be?!” Mia was incredulous.

Cullen sighed and sat beside Athena and noticed that she was pale, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m not sure…” Athena was quite confused as to why she was feeling so queasy.

“Are you getting ill?”

“I hope not.”

They watched Curly’s sisters argue for several minutes before he whispered, “What do you think?” Athena shook her head. “Not helping?”

“Can you tell me what you found out?” Athena whispered back.

Cullen shook his head and continued to whisper, “Not here.”

Athena asked softly, “Where’s Ana?”

“She’s with Darius and Dorian. They’re trying to find her real parents,” Cullen sighed heavily. In the few minutes he saw of Ana, he couldn’t imagine parents not wanting her.

“What about Varric and Leliana?” Athena put her arm under Curly’s to hold his hand.

“At the barracks talking to Timson.”

Athena sighed. She missed a lot while sleeping, “Did you get any sleep?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “A little… You know, you’re part of this family too.”

Athena smiled at him, “Not officially… Yet.”

Cullen looked over at his sisters who were still arguing, “They’re going to be at that for a while, and I’m guessing we woke you?”

Athena nodded in answer. Curly stood and helped Duchess to her feet, “Then let’s go find something to eat.”

Once they were sitting across from each other in the kitchen with lunch in front of them, Athena asked, “How did you find out that Timson was lying?”

“He went back to Brenna’s house, and started searching through it. Leliana’s people had already cleaned it out though. They also took the extra precaution…” Cullen stopped, not sure how much Athena wanted to hear.

“It’s all right, Cullen. I feel a little sympathy for her if what she said was true. It still isn’t a reason to try to kill someone,” Athena said quietly.

“Since Corypheus was defeated the dwarves have been making specially lined caskets for those that had red lyrium in them. They used one for Brenna and buried her. She’s not coming back this time… Athena, are you sure you’re feeling all right?” Curly took hold of her hand as he watched Athena push the food around on her plate.

“I’m fine, just not very hungry,” Athena smiled at him.

“How did you hurt your ankle?”

“I tripped when I was running…” Athena paused, thinking it odd that Cullen was there with her instead of interrogating one of his soldiers, “Why aren’t you interrogating Timson?”

“Because he stands a better chance of living with Leliana and Varric.” Cullen released her hand and got up to pace, “He’s known for a while that Brenna wanted to kill you and he didn’t say a word. How can I let him stay a part of the Inquisition forces knowing that he’ll probably put your life in danger again? And then for Rosalie to show up and defend him, without knowing what he did. I don’t understand why she won’t take my word over his.”

Athena watched him pace and smiled, “She thinks she loves him. Is it possible that he was trying to convince Brenna not to go through with her plans?”

“According to the letters, that’s what he was trying to do, but a threat against the Inquisitor is something you tell your Commander. Whether you think it’s a real threat or just gossip,” Cullen wanted to hit something.

"What would you have done if you had known sooner?"

“Waited until the threat was eliminated to come here.”

“So, you would have put our lives on hold indefinitely?” Athena raised an auburn eyebrow at him.

Cullen sighed and sat, “My responsibility and my duty is to protect you. Even before I fell in love with you, that is what I signed on to do. Am I supposed to stop doing that just because we’re in love?”

“No…” Athena stopped to think of the best way to put what she needed to say, “But, the threats aren’t going to stop. I don’t want to hide away in Skyhold terrified of where or when the next threat is going to come from. Hopefully, this is the last one from my past...” Athena took hold of his hand again and waited for him to look at her, when Cullen did, she said quietly, “I would do anything to protect you.”

"And I, you," Curly said just as quietly.

“Once, Timson cared for Brenna, he may have just been trying to protect her…” Athena trailed off.

“What are you saying?”

“All I am doing is trying to get you to look at this from all possibilities. This isn’t my decision to make,” Athena yawned.

"You're going back to bed," Cullen stood and didn’t relinquish her hand.

“No, I’m not,” Athena sighed, looking beyond Cullen and in to the doorway to a crying Rosalie and a very irritated Mia.

“See, Rosalie? I told you he had his reasons,” Mia stated.

Cullen closed his eyes and sighed. Athena stood and hobbled over to him. He put his arm around her and whispered, “I really need to get you to a healer.”

Athena smiled up at him and whispered, “I love you.”

He bent down to kiss her, “I love you, too.”

“Cullen, take Athena to a healer. Rosalie needs time to calm down anyway,” Mia ordered.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Mia smiled at our lovers.

Cullen wrapped an arm around Athena’s waist and said as they left, “I should carry you.”

“Unless it’s to the bedroom, don’t you dare,” Athena warned.

Cullen slowly smiled, “We can get to the healer faster if I carry you.”

Athena chuckled, “No.”

“Stubborn,” he whispered.

“I heard that,” Athena griped.

“Good,” the smirk he had faded when he saw Nightingale, “Leliana does not look happy.”

Athena sighed, “I guess the healer will have to wait.”

“No, it won’t,” Cullen shook his head at Leliana and picked Athena up.

“Cullen!” Athena yelled in shock.

“I told you that carrying you would be faster,” Cullen chuckled.

“Finally convinced her to go to a healer?” Leliana fell into step beside Curly.

“I didn’t need convincing,” Athena griped.

“It’s a long story, Leliana, but this is the first chance we had,” Cullen explained, “Where’s Varric?”

“He needed to blow off some steam,” Leliana said.

“So Timson’s still alive then,” Cullen sighed, and the three of them went in to the healer’s place. Cullen put Athena down in a chair.

The healer smiled at Athena and introduced herself. Athena gave only her first name and the healer healed her ankle. Athena thanked the healer, and our trio left. As they were leaving Cullen softly questioned, “Did you want talk to her about how you’ve been feeling poorly?”

“I feel fine now,” Athena smiled at her love. 

Her smile went away when she saw my scowl. Sheathing Bianca, I said, “We should have brought Seeker along.”

"Timson isn't talking?” Athena guessed.

“No, he’s not,” Leliana grumbled.

“Who's with him now?" Duchess asked.

“Sparkler is,” I answered.

“Why?”

“Besides you, Inquisitor, he seems to be the only one with a cool head about this,” Leliana explained.

“Any word on why Dorian and Darius left without coming to us first?” Athena asked.

“Commander?” Leliana wondered why Duchess didn't already know.

“There was a family emergency, and I didn’t get to tell Athena everything,” Cullen answered.

Athena stopped and turned to face all of us, “I want the full story, now.”

“As they were leaving the barracks Darius overheard Timson saying that Brenna was planning to feed red lyrium to the little girl she had in her care.” Leliana said, ‘”Darius ran for the nearest horse, Dorian followed him saying that they should at least get a message back to us about what’s happening. But Darius just kept riding, and Dorian didn’t know who to trust…”

“Is there anything else I’m missing?” Athena started walking again and we followed.

"Is there a sparring ring here?" I asked.

“Not that I’ve seen,” Duchess said, “why?”

"We may want to find one…” I drawled out.

“Varric...” Leliana warned.

“They need to know, Nightingale,” I argued and won.

Leliana sighed, “Timson gave Brenna information about the Inquisitor to keep her from going after your sister, Commander.”

Athena grabbed Cullen’s arm before he had a chance to move, and shook her head when he looked at her, “Cullen, not like this. I’m not saying he doesn’t deserve what you have in mind, but I won’t risk you getting hurt because of anger.”

"She's right, Commander," Leliana said quietly.

“Leliana, can you check on Darius and Ana?” Athena requested.

“Yes, my lady,” and Nightingale disappeared.

“I can handle myself in a fight,” Cullen growled, barely restraining his anger.

“That’s not her point, Curly, and you know it,” I defended Duchess.

“Varric, does this chantry have a dungeon like the one in Haven did?” Athena asked.

“I can certainly find out. Timson should be locked up then?” I asked for clarification.

“Yes, please,” Athena ordered nicely. She waited until I left to start talking to Cullen, “If I go somewhere that isn’t the chantry, will you come with me?”

“Athena…” Cullen let out an irritated sigh.

“I’m asking because I’m really tired of digging my heels in and still having you pull me in the direction you want to go,” Athena wasn’t willing to admit that she twisted her freshly healed ankle when Curly started dragging her along.

"You said you trusted me," Cullen accused, taking his anger out on her.

“I do trust you…” Athena waited for the tension between them to relax. When it didn’t, she took Curly standing still as her cue, “Cullen, come with me, please?” She waited for a while before he sighed and nodded.

"Thank you," Athena said quietly. They walked holding hands (mostly because Athena had a death grip on Curly’s hand) and in silence to the graveyard. “When we came here, you had to nudge me along because I would freeze in terror. You also promised that you wouldn’t let go…” Athena opened the gate to the graveyard, “because of you I’m a little less afraid of these now.” They entered the graveyard and there was a little bench that she sat down on, so she could rest her re-injured ankle, and never let go of Cullen’s hand.

Cullen was still standing, and still very angry, “Athena, where are you going with this?”

“Not that long ago you had told me that I was nothing like Blackwall, and a guilt I had carried around for far too long…I no longer feel. Because of my trust in you, my faith in you, my love for you, I’m a better person. You also never let me go into a battle angry or not thinking clearly. Why would you think I wouldn’t do everything in my power to do the same for you?”

Cullen sighed and sat beside her, “You’re right.”

“I also don’t want you to make any decisions in anger that you may regret later,” Athena said quietly.

"I guess that means I can't go back to Mia's and yell at Rosalie," He said without heat.

Athena chuckled, “No, you can’t.”

Cullen put his arm around her and they just sat there for a while, and then he guessed, “You want to talk to him, don’t you?”

“I do.”

“What do you hope to learn?” Cullen asked.

“I don’t know, I just remember him being teased mercilessly for not knowing that we were together. Since I’m the one he’s been talking about, maybe he’ll talk to me."

“I don’t like this,” Cullen was worried for her.

“Cullen, I’m not going to talk to him alone. Despite what you may be thinking right now, I do listen to you,” Athena smiled.

Cullen caressed her cheek and sighed, “I know you do. I’m sorry for taking my anger out on you. I just-"

“Couldn’t see straight?” Athena asked with a wry smile.

Cullen chuckled in answer. He stood up and pulled Athena to her feet, “Let’s get this over with.”

Before they went anywhere she stood up on tiptoe, kissed him, and then teased him, “Even when your angry I still find you incredibly attractive.”

Cullen groaned, “If you want to talk to Timson...”

Athena laughed, "Let's go.”

Once they reached the chantry, she let go of Cullen’s hand and asked Sparkler to come with her.

“I am not going to be subject to the Inquisitor’s wrath?” Dorian smiled as they walked to the dungeon door.

“No, I would’ve done the same thing,” Cullen sighed and sat down on hearing that. Athena chuckled and said, “Sorry, my love.”

“Why aren’t you and the Commander talking to him?” Sparkler asked.

“That wouldn’t be wise right now,” Athena looked behind her as Cullen got up to pace.

"That bad?" Dorian held the door open for her.

“Apparently Timson was giving Brenna information on me to protect Cullen’s sister,” Athena answered.

Sparkler gave a low whistle, “How did you stop the Commander from killing Timson?”

“He loves me,” Athena grinned.

“All the more reason,” Sparkler quipped.

“I took him to a place where I hoped he would listen to reason and it worked.”

“What are you hoping to gain by talking to him?”

“I want to know how Brenna found out about him and Rosalie, and through all this, I haven’t really been allowed to do anything that I usually do,” Athena answered.

“And it has nothing to do with you almost killing yourself at Skyhold,” Sparkler said sarcastically.

“The strange thing is, though, I don’t think it’s because of my actions. Even though I’m the one that should have brought another person along. I think Cullen and Leliana are still feeling guilty over what happened… I know that is precisely why Leliana is here instead of someone else,” Athena said.

Sparkler said nothing as he couldn’t really argue with her. As they approached the cell Timson was in, Athena cast a little spell that made the air around Timson sparkle. Dorian asked, “What was that?”

“A truth spell,” Athena winked at him.

Sparkler smiled broadly and whispered, “You’re brilliant.”

Timson on the other hand paled and started trembling in fear. Athena faced him and asked, “Do you know who I am?”

“Y-yes, Inquisitor, I know who you are,” Timson stuttered.

“Tell me about Brenna,” Athena ordered (apparently she had been taking lessons on interrogating from Seeker.)

“What do you want to know?” Timson watched the sparkles get brighter courtesy of Sparkler.

“Why didn’t you tell Commander Cullen about the threats she made about me?”

“Before I joined the Inquisition, I broke up with her and started seeing someone else. Brenna found out and started threatening the girl I was with. She was pregnant and my best friend left her. I knew of her hatred for you. So, I told Brenna that I would join the Inquisition to get close to you, but every time I would ask about you, they would stop talking except to say that I didn’t have a chance. However, everyone was willing to talk of your exploits, and I would send those stories back and led her to believe that the plan was working. Then the call went out for soldiers to go along to South Reach…”

“And you told Brenna…” Dorian said quietly.

“If we hadn’t come here, Brenna had told me she would abduct Rosalie and bring her to Skyhold so I could watch her die. And then she planned to kill you,” Timson looked away.

“Why didn’t you tell the Commander all this?” Athena asked.

“I’m afraid of him,” Timson said and the sparkly air got very bright, “it’s true. Rosalie is his sister and all she talked about was how he was a Templar and how he constantly fights evil.”

Athena didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at the absurd claim. Before she gave herself away she turned her back on Timson and looked to Dorian to take over the interrogation. He did, with enthusiasm, “You knew this woman was threatening the Inquisitor and the Commander’s sister, and you didn’t tell him because you’re afraid of him? You aren’t making sense.”

Timson shrugged, “He was always doing something and the way the other soldiers talk about him you’d think he was the human version of the Maker.”

Athena had to bite her bottom lip hard to keep from laughing. She did a little flourish with her hand to make sure Timson saw the air sparkle. Sparkler questioned, “Why didn’t you tell your superior officer?”

“I had lied to be part of the Inquisition, and I was afraid that the lie would be found out,” Timson said quietly.

“Oh?” Athena asked, finally composed.

“I’m not of noble birth.”

“Why would you lie about that?” Athena was incredulous.

“Because nobles get what they want,” Timson said bitterly.

“How much of this does Rosalie know?” Athena didn’t want to believe Rosalie had a hand in this.

“She doesn’t know any of it,” Timson sighed.

“What about the little girl that was with Brenna?” Dorian asked.

“I know nothing about her except that Brenna tried to tell me that she was mine,” Timson said, irritated.

“When we were traveling, you tried to come into the tent I shared with the Commander, why?” Athena asked.

"I was hoping to talk to you.”

“About?”

“I wanted to warn you,” Timson said quietly.

“Why feign an interest in me?” Athena asked.

“All of the other soldiers are in love with you. You are beautiful, but I love Rosalie. For what it’s worth, I am sorry for all the lies,” Timson replied.

“Any other questions, Inquisitor?” Dorian asked.

“Not at the moment. You will have to stay in here for at least the night, Timson,” Athena said quietly.

Timson nodded, “Understood.”

The sparkly air faded as they left the dungeon. Once they were out of Timson’s listening range, Dorian said, “The truth “spell” was utter brilliance. Athena, you’re bleeding.”

Athena licked her bottom lip, and leaned against the wall laughing, “I didn’t know what else to do to keep from laughing.”

"Your soon to be husband being likened to the Maker is hilarious,” Sparkler chuckled, “Now, for the hard question. How do you want to approach telling him all this?”

Athena sighed, “I don’t know... You can tell him about being likened to the Maker, I wouldn’t be able to get through it without laughing.”

“And, when, pray tell, am I supposed to tell him this?”

“During a chess game,” Athena’s tone said she was stating the obvious.

“Oh… OH! Again, brilliant, Cousin!” Sparkler opened the door for her.

“Oh…. Dear…” Athena breathed as she saw all of us (including Mia, Rosalie, and the baby) waiting. Cullen was still pacing.

“Looks like you aren’t getting a choice,” Sparkler whispered.

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “Andraste preserve me.”

“Finally!” Cullen exclaimed when he turned to face where Dorian and Athena were standing.

Athena walked over to him and reached up to kiss him. He winced slightly when she touched him, “Cullen?”

“I'm fine," he whispered. The look she gave him said she doubted that. “What did you find out?”

“I’m not saying anything until you sit down,” Athena said quietly, but with an edge in her voice that made it clear that Curly was not to refuse.

When Cullen sat, Leliana breathed a sigh of relief, “Thank the Maker.”

Athena sat beside Cullen and watched him. She was right, he did not look well. She sighed, “Where’s Darius?”

“Back at my house with Ana. She likes cookies too,” Mia smiled at her soon to be sister in law.

“I should have asked earlier, but…” Athena trailed off.

Mia chuckled, “The baby was in my room sleeping.”

Athena smiled at her, “Thank you, Mia.” And then she looked at Sparkler.

“Athena got him to talk, and what’s more, she got him to stop lying,” Dorian was enjoying this way too much.

“How?” Leliana asked.

“Pure brilliance, a truth spell,” Sparkler answered conspiratorially.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

Athena chuckled, “I made the air around Timson sparkle and called it a truth spell. Every time we thought he was lying we made the sparkles brighter.”

“Maker, that is brilliant," Leliana said.

Athena was watching Cullen who seemed to be getting worse by the minute. He had his eyes closed and didn’t smile when she rested her hand on his. Athena talked quietly but quickly and skipped over Timson being afraid of Curly and comparing him to the Maker. However, she said everything else including that Rosalie’s life had also been threatened by Brenna.

“All of this was to protect Rosalie?” Mia asked.

Athena looked at Cullen who was slowly getting up and asked, “Where are you going?”

“To kill him,” Cullen said hoarsely.

Rosalie heard through her tears, and screamed, “Don’t you dare!” Which woke her baby and he started crying. Cullen noticeably winced and Sparkler and I looked at each other.

“No, you are not,” Athena drew out each word. He looked at her with such pain and anger in his eyes. Before he could say anything she said quietly but firmly, “Cullen, I don’t want to use magic on you, but I will.” 

“You wouldn’t,” Cullen said angrily, being taken back to a time when his fear of magic overrode his good sense. Athena didn’t respond and they stared at each other for several minutes.

Athena sighed and looked away from him to answer Mia’s question, “For Timson it may have been about protecting Rosalie. But, Brenna’s last words to me were that Bernard was her father, and he abandoned her when I was born. So, she would have eventually tried again.”

“Rosalie, we’re going home,” Mia stood getting her first real look at Cullen, and worriedly asked, “Athena?”

Athena mouthed “Send Darius.” Mia nodded, grabbed the baby, and left with a sobbing Rosalie following her.

Dorian and I got up to barricade the door to the dungeon in case Curly was somehow able to get to it. Leliana went to ask, “Should I get the healer?”

Athena looked at her with a great sadness in her eyes, “No, there’s nothing she can do.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Athena gently rubbed Cullen’s back as he had his elbows on his knees and head down.

“You could?” Nightingale asked. Athena closed her eyes against the sting of the tears and nodded. Leliana shook her head, gently squeezed Duchess’ shoulder, “We’ll talk later, my friend.” And left to shoot arrows at something to give her anger a release.

“Where’s Dorian and Varric?” Cullen whispered hoarsely, not moving.

“Standing at the door to the cells.”

“Do they really think I would risk hurting you to get to him?” He whispered, slowly moving to a sitting position.

“Not intentionally. They also know that I wouldn’t use magic on you without your permission. However, if you had moved any further off of this bench I would have,” Athena couldn’t quite keep her anger and fear out of her voice.

“Why?” Cullen opened his brown eyes to look at her.

She saw that the pain and the memories were slowly fading. “Earlier today I told you that I would do anything to protect you. I meant it. Even if it means that I have to protect you from yourself. The only person that would have been doing any dying would have been you trying to navigate the stairs… that’s if you could even get that far with how you’re feeling. Then the Inquisition would be without a Commander, Mia, Rosalie, and Branson would be without a brother, the baby would be without an uncle,” Athena fought back tears, “and I would be without the love of my life.”

“Athena…” Cullen cupped her cheek with his hand.

“How long have you been in pain?” Athena asked with a hint of accusation in her voice.

“It’s not important, and you know it comes in waves,” Cullen felt more like himself now that the pain had mostly waned.

“How long?” Athena repeated, “Were you in pain before Dorian and I went to talk to Timson?”

Cullen sighed, “No. It started about an hour before you came up.”

Athena sighed from relief, “I love you, Cullen, and I’m sorry for being upset with you.”

“You were right to be upset with me. I love you, too,” he gently kissed her. 

Darius came slamming through the chantry doors. Cullen winced and said softly, “I’m feeling better, but not that much better.”

“I asked Mia to send him. I wasn’t sure if Varric and Dorian knew…” Athena trailed off.

“Mia said the Commander was ill,” Darius said as he walked up to Athena.

“He looked like he was going to pass out,” I walked over to them. I wanted answers as to why Duchess had to threaten the man she loved with magic so he didn’t kill himself.

“The pain got that bad?” Darius asked.

“I wasn’t going to pass out,” Cullen grumbled, disliking this kind of attention.

“All I know is that Athena was very worried about you and you wanted to go off and kill someone,” I argued.

“Varric, now is not the time,” Athena warned.

Dorian was the only one brave enough to sit beside Curly, “Would you or Athena like to share what’s going on?”

Athena looked at Cullen and gently took his hand. Cullen looked down at their hands and sighed, “When I joined the Inquisition I stopped taking lyrium.”

“That was years ago, Curly, why is it only starting to affect you now?” 

“It’s been an ongoing thing, Varric,” Athena said quietly.

“How often does this happen? Can’t this kill you?” I pried.

“More times than I would like to admit, and it hasn’t yet,” Cullen said quietly.

“How long have you known, Athena?” Sparkler asked.

“Cullen told me that he stopped taking it shortly after we got to Skyhold,” she didn’t take her eyes off of Curly.

“And you’re okay with it?” I asked.

“When I first started at the circle, there was a couple older Templars that were friendly with me. One even said that I reminded him of his granddaughter. By the time I was thirteen, they couldn’t remember their own names. At times, the granddaughter would visit, and he would always confuse us. She hit him once, because he kept getting us confused, and after that I couldn’t approach him. Every time he saw me, he saw his granddaughter lashing out at him. 

“There are a lot of things that can kill a person, but usually there’s a way to stop that from happening. Once memories are gone, there isn’t a safe way to get them back. So, the short answer would be, yes, I fully support Cullen’s decision.” Athena gently squeezed Cullen's hand.

“When these attacks happen wouldn’t you be able to take the pain away?” Darius asked Athena (he already knew the answer, he just wanted her to say it in front of everyone.)

Athena sighed, knowing what he was doing, “Yes, when they happen. I cannot stop them from happening, though.”

“You’ve done it with other Templars then, with no… issues… For you?” Dorian queried.

“More times than I can count, and I’ve never had an issue,” Athena said quietly.

“Does Curly know this?” I asked.

“It’s been discussed,” Cullen said.

"Getting confused here,” I couldn't believe he was refusing aid.

“You know I won’t use magic on someone without their permission, unless I’m in battle or it’s a life or death situation,” Athena explained.

“How close did Curly come tonight?”

“If he had stood, he wouldn’t have gotten any further,” Tears filled Athena’s violet eyes.

“You don’t freeze things…” Sparkler started.

“Then how?” Darius asked.

“I use a cage. Where I can control every movement of whatever is in it,” Athena’s voice was barely above a whisper. A single tear escaped, her eyes still not leaving Curly.

“The demon at Skyhold,” I breathed.

“I was crushing her…not that it did any good,” Athena whispered. We didn’t know what to say after that. Athena closed her eyes against the tears and filled the silence with her guilt ridden voice, “it’s not something I like to use, but there are times where it comes in handy.”

Dorian was perturbed by this, “Athena, there is no reason to be ashamed about using the magic you know. The fact that you can do it so well without lyrium is astounding.”

“You don’t use lyrium?” Darius asked.

"No... I thought you already knew?” 

“You know how gossip is, Athena,” Darius said gently. Which got a half hearted smile out of her.

Athena looked at Cullen, “We need to get back to Mia’s…”

Cullen caressed her cheek, “I know.”

“On the bright side, it’s the middle of the night. There won’t be many people out if Curly needs help walking,” I said.

"I can walk,” Cullen moved slowly to stand. He wobbled a little, but he stayed standing.

“Dorian and I are going to walk right beside you… And Commander, I have no qualms about carrying you,” Darius warned.

Athena choked back a mischievous little laugh and smile before anyone really noticed and moved out of Cullen’s way… Problem was, Curly wasn’t letting go of Duchess’s hand, he said softly, “Give us a minute?”

We moved far enough away to give them some privacy, but not so far that we couldn’t assist if Curly was brought to his knees again. He pulled Athena close to him, hugged her, and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“Cullen, you don’t have to apologize for being in pain,” Athena was confused as to why he was apologizing.

“I’m not,” and then he softened his tone, “tonight could have been handled far better, and I’m sorry for once again taking my anger out on you.”

“It’s been a rough couple of days,” Athena said quietly. “Mia is probably frantic with worry.”

“Let’s go,” Cullen released her and we left the chantry. 

Athena and I were following Curly and his escort. We reached Mia’s and they got Curly up stairs and into their bedroom without further incident. Athena helped him into bed, kissed him and whispered, “I would love to stay here with you, but I can’t, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Athena,” Cullen said softly, “go do what you need to do.”

Somehow Athena got past all of us and in to the garden without anyone being the wiser. Just like with Ana the sky had far more stars than was normal for a while. Nightingale was in the garden too, and as the last of the pent up magic left Athena, she said softly, “That’s new.”

Athena jumped, “I thought I was the only one out here.”

“Sorry, Cullen is…” Leliana sat down beside her.

“In bed… At least that’s where he was when I left,” Athena finished for her.

“Not asleep?”

Athena shook her head, “I don’t know. I couldn’t wait any longer,” Athena took off her shoes that were now ruined, “I liked these...”

Leliana took one and was shocked at its state of disrepair, “When did this happen?!”

“The first time I tried to stop Cullen from killing Timson,” Athena sighed.

“You were literally digging in your heels."

“What else was I supposed to do?”

Leliana sighed, “Nothing. Walking around all day in ruined shoes… Are you injured?”

“I’m sure there are bruises and cuts. My ankle hurts again.”

“Why?” 

“I twisted it again,” Athena sighed wearily.

“When he was pulling on you?” Leliana asked.

“Yes.”

“He’ll never forgive himself,” Leliana stated.

“I know… But I really liked those shoes,” Athena whined.

“I feel your pain, my friend. You have another pair of shoes, yes?” Leliana put the broken shoe down.

“If there were others packed, I can’t find them,” Athena chuckled.

Leliana chuckled, “I’m not letting Josie live this down. I have an extra pair you can borrow. Once we’ve all had some sleep, we’ll go shoe shopping.”

“Thank you,” Athena looked at the last of her magic fading away in the sky.

“The new release you do, it is preferable over the old one?” 

“Very much so, I don’t have to do it as often. And it’s pretty,” Athena smiled.

“Your mother’s journal?”

“Mostly, and Morrigan and I have kept in touch,” Athena looked at her friend.

Leliana laughed, “Cullen will never forgive you… Nor will Alistair.”

“I always found her quite enjoyable. She also didn’t mind me spoiling Kieran,” Athena said.

“She’s just laying in wait to get you back for distracting him from his studies,” Leliana teased.

Athena chuckled, “Probably.” She sighed then, “It’s been a long and exhausting couple days.”

“It has at that, my friend. I’m surprised you’re not sleeping.”

“I wouldn’t be able to if I tried,” Athena said.

“What’s on your mind?” 

Athena laughed, “Everything.”

Leliana chuckled as well, “ Timson, what do you make of him?”

“I think he’s young and foolish, and I think he was trying to do the right thing. He just had a very wrong way of going about it. Even though Dorian’s certain we got the truth out of him, I’m not so sure.”

“Why?” 

“The reason he gave for not telling Cullen all of this is just, so odd…” Athena paused, “Timson’s afraid of him…”

“That’s not unusual for a new recruit.”

“Leliana, Timson’s afraid of him because Cullen is always busy and the way the other soldiers talk about him. Timson said it made Cullen look like the human version of the Maker…” Athena took hold of Leliana’s hands.

“The what?!” Leliana exclaimed.

Athena started laughing, “You can’t tell a soul until Dorian is able to have his chess match.”

“Oh, this is better than the admirers at the Winter Palace. How did you not start laughing right then and there?” Leliana asked.

“I bit my lip so hard I made it bleed and Dorian had to take over the questioning for a couple minutes.” Athena’s smile faded, and she grew serious, “I can’t help but be impressed with all the lies he told and his ability to keep them straight.”

“You think Timson should still have a place with the Inquisition,” Leliana guessed.

“We’ve let worse in. Being a soldier is not for him…” Athena confirmed what her friend said.

“A spy?” Leliana asked. 

Athena nodded, “But is the fight with Cullen worth it?”

“What do you think his intentions are with Cullen’s sister?” Leliana asked.

“I think he truly cares for her. Now, with what I assume is broken trust, I’m not sure it will last,” Athena said.

“Why did you stop Cullen the first time?” Leliana looked behind Athena.

“Because I’ve been yelled at for going in to battle upset, angry, sleep deprived, without information, and hungry,” Leliana chuckled at the last of Athena’s answers.

“But this was intensely personal. Playing the woman he loves off of his baby sister,” Leliana reminded her softly.

“All the more reason to not allow him, don’t you think?”

Leliana nodded, “Has Cullen given you a reason for not letting you take away the pain of the lyrium withdrawal attacks?”

Athena sighed, “This is really a conversation you should have with Cullen.”

“Athena, I was there with Selene when she rescued him at the Fereldan Circle. I know what he went through,” Leliana said gently.

“There’s more to it than that, Leliana,” Athena said quietly, looking away.

“I understand, but I still think he should let you,” Leliana stood with Athena’s shoes in hand, throwing them at something behind Duchess, “And you owe her a new pair of shoes.”

Athena closed her eyes and shook her head. Leliana chuckled and left as Cullen sat beside Duchess looking at the shoes he caught, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“There wasn’t time. Why are you out of bed?” Athena opened her eyes.

“When I woke up you weren’t there,” he answered quietly.

“I’m glad you slept,” Athena took the shoes out of his hands and dropped them on the ground, “Do I want to know what you heard?”

Cullen chuckled, “Probably not. I started listening when Leliana asked about Timson being a spy. Have you even tried to sleep?”

Athena shook her head, “After releasing the built up magic, Leliana and I started talking.”

“I should blame her then,” Cullen said softly.

“No. I’d still be sitting here even without talking to Leliana, and I would be a lot worse off than just being tired.”

The sun was starting it’s ascent for a new day when Cullen asked, “Why?”

Athena sighed, “I’ve never seen you that angry…And way too much has happened in the past few days for me to even think straight. When Josie, Leliana, and I get together, it’s to talk about the day’s stresses, it’s almost never gossip. It’s a way for us to clear our heads….” Athena bent down to pick up her damaged shoes, “The sun is coming up. I don’t like greeting it this way.”

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” Cullen wasn’t able to follow her disjointed thoughts.

“Cullen, in the past few days I’ve gotten three hours of sleep. What I’m thinking and feeling is so mixed up with exhaustion right now, that I don’t want to talk anymore, and I’m getting very cranky,” Athena stood, “I’m going to bed. I know you haven’t had much sleep either, care to join me?”

Cullen stood, “If I said no, I have a feeling that I would be getting yelled at.” Athena smiled in answer and took hold of one of his hands with her free one.


	29. Chapter 29

The sun streamed in through the windows and Cullen woke to clothing being thrown around the room, “Athena?”

Athena blushed and started gathering up her mess, “I was looking for shoes.”

“Are they that bad?” He got out of bed.

“Yes,” Athena threw an armful of clothing into her trunk.

Cullen walked over to her, took hold of her hands, and pulled her over to the bed, “Is this really about the shoes?”

“Yes, I really don’t want to walk around South Reach without shoes… Leliana said I could borrow a pair of hers,” Athena wanted to continue her search.

Cullen wasn’t letting go of her hands, “Athena, did you get any sleep?”

Athena chuckled and blushed, "Yes, I did. I was hoping to try and help find Ana’s parents today. We can’t let Timson sit in the chantry’s dungeon indefinitely.”

“And we still have to talk,” Cullen said. 

Athena looked away and sighed, “Yes.”

“I know I hurt you yesterday, and I’m sorry for that,” Cullen felt like his apology wasn’t enough.

Athena sighed, “It wasn’t that you hurt me… you scared me. We had fought so hard to survive the war, the breach, Corypheus, and everything that he threw at us… And it seemed like you were willing to throw our future away over one very foolish boy.”

“He put your life in danger and Rosalie’s life in danger,” Cullen argued.

“Brenna was the one that wanted to kill us, not Timson, and she’s gone now. I’m not saying that he was right to lie, and his reasons for not coming forward are beyond my comprehension. You had every right to be angry, but please don’t ever threaten to kill someone when you are in that much pain again?” Athena begged with tears in her eyes.

Cullen kissed her, “I’ll do my best not to. What do you mean reasons? You only said one last night.”

Athena started fighting a smile, “Cullen, I-“ she paused, biting her lip, “I told Dorian that I would let him tell you…”

“Why?”

Athena closed her eyes, “Timson’s afraid of you. You’re always busy and the way Rosalie and the other soldiers talk about you…” She giggled, “he said hearing all that makes you sound like the human version of the Maker.”

Cullen closed his eyes and shook his head, “I don’t even know what to make of that.”

Athena kissed him and teased seductively, “Well, you are engaged to the Herald of Andraste.”

Cullen opened his eyes and pushed Athena down on the bed, “You’re right, I am.”

Clothing came off and passions were sated. As they were getting dressed again, Cullen heard Athena sigh. He looked over and saw that she was holding her ruined shoes, “What is it with you and these shoes?”

“They were my favorite pair, and all of my other shoes are back at Skyhold,” Athena was despondent. Cullen shook his head at her, chuckling. She responded, “Imagine losing your favorite brush.”

"I do not have a favorite brush!” Cullen exclaimed, trying desperately to not blush.

“Yes,” Athena went to get the door as someone knocked on it, “you do.”

“I do not,” Curly grumbled.

Leliana hugged Athena, “What did you do to him now?”

“He was laughing at me because I was mourning my shoes,” Athena pouted.

Leliana gasped, “Commander! I’m going to hide your favorite brush!”

“Maker’s breath! I do not—“ Cullen paused, seeing the ladies laugh, “I’d fare better with Dorian at chess.”

“You can’t tell him that I told you,” Athena reminded him.

“Oh good, he knows,” Leliana grinned mischievously.

“What did you do?” Cullen asked.

"Nothing... Yet," Leliana’s smile was positively wicked.

“Wait until we get back to Skyhold?” Athena pleaded.

“Of course, my lady. I brought an extra pair of shoes,” Leliana produced the extra pair. Athena put them on. They were too big for her petite feet. Nightingale shook her head, “Does Josie have shoes specially made for you?”

"I believe those were. I thought they were indestructible considering everything I put them through,” Athena looked at the forlorn pair again.

“We finally get to go shoe shopping,” Leliana said.

“True,” Athena smiled at her. Cullen took her hand and the trio walked down the stairs, Leliana and Athena went off shoe shopping while Curly stayed behind to talk to his sisters. 

As soon as the door shut, Mia launched in to her questions, “What happened to you last night?”

“When I joined the Inquisition, I stopped taking lyrium,” Cullen answered.

“That could kill you!” Rosalie exclaimed.

“It hasn’t yet, and the alternative is far worse,” Cullen responded.

“How long has Athena known?” Mia asked.

“I told her shortly after we got to Skyhold.”

“Do those attacks happen often?” Mia asked.

“No, they don’t happen often. Usually only when I push myself too far,” Curly looked out of the window at Darius playing with Ana.

"I’m assuming Athena is all right with you not taking lyrium anymore?” Mia asked.

“Yes, she has been very supportive.”

“You won’t let her help you, will you?” Mia asked… It was more of a statement though.

“She has had enough to deal with without having to help me,” Cullen looked back at his older sister.

“I don’t think she would agree with you,” Mia stated.

Cullen half heartedly chuckled, "Probably not.”

“Will you at least consider letting her take away the pain?” Rosalie asked.

“I’ve been considering it since she brought it up a while ago. Something always comes up to keep us from discussing it again,” He took a sip of his drink.

Mia shook her head, letting him know that she doubted that, “Did Athena get to the healer yesterday?”

“Yes, why?”

“I thought I saw her limping when she left…” Mia answered.

“The shoes she currently has on are too big for her,” Cullen explained.

“I don’t think that’s it.”

Cullen shrugged, “Athena didn’t say anything about being injured.”

"Has she ever?" Mia chuckled.

“At times,” Curly chuckled with her.

“Cullen, what’s going to happen with Timson?” Rosalie asked. Mia gave an irritated sigh.

“That’s something Athena, Leliana, and I have to discuss,” Cullen answered firmly.

“Can I see him?” Rosalie asked.

“Rosalie!” Mia was shocked that her sister would even think to request that after last night.

Cullen sighed, “Who would care for the baby?”

“Mia could,” Rosalie volunteered.

“You want Cullen to take you?!” Mia came very close to shouting (thankfully the baby was sleeping peacefully in another room.)

“Rosalie, the next time I’m going near Timson is to tell him if he’s staying with the Inquisition. It would not be in his best interest for me to see him before then,” Cullen responded.

“Or yours,” Mia said so softly that only Cullen heard her.

“Very funny, Mia,” Cullen griped. Mia chuckled.

"He's a good man, Cullen," Rosalie said, trying to sway him.

“I’m not going to discuss this with you, Rosalie,” Cullen’s brown eyes flashed with anger.

Rosalie left the kitchen in tears. Mia shook her head, “You’ll be leaving soon, won’t you?”

Cullen nodded, “Athena misses Skyhold.”

“And you?” She asked.

Cullen chuckled softly, “I guess I do. It’s become our home.”

Mia hugged him, “I’m happy for you.”   
As Curly and Mia moved in to the living room, they heard: “They did not!”

“Yes, they did, Leliana!” Athena laughed as she opened the door.

“I still think it was Cassandra,” Leliana griped. 

"I will go back and buy them… In fact, I think that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Josie would love to see them.”

“Don’t. You. Dare!” Leliana drew out. 

Athena laughed as she reached up to kiss Curly. After the kiss ended, he asked, “Do I want to know what you two are arguing about?”

“On our way back we passed a little bakery. They had little cakes with Leliana’s likeness on them,” Athena explained.

“I know that bakery, they’re always doing silly things like that,” Mia said, “I’m going to go check on Rosalie and the baby.”

Cullen looked around, astounded by the several bags now littering the sitting room floor, “How many shoes did you need?”

Athena chuckled, “I only got three pairs of shoes. The rest are Leliana’s.”

“I couldn’t help myself,” Nightingale shrugged.

“Is everything okay?” Athena asked, noticing how quickly Mia left.

“Rosalie wants to see Timson and asked me to take her.”

“And what did you tell her?”

“That I wasn’t going near him until a decision was made about him staying with the Inquisition,” Cullen chuckled when Athena sighed in relief.

“Then I guess that’s what we should discuss first,” Leliana said.

“It sounded as though it was already decided last night,” Cullen remarked.

“No, it wasn’t. I was just saying what I thought to someone who wasn’t blinded with anger. It’s still not my decision to make,” Athena cleaned her hands of that decision.

“Do you agree with her Leliana?” Cullen asked.

“Timson has definitely proven that he can keep a secret. Athena was also right that we’ve let worse in… My worry is what would happen if he moves on from your sister?”

“I don’t think he would have done all of this, if he didn’t love her,” Athena defended him.

“Have you ever lied for someone you love? Not to mention the plot he concocted to try to get close to you,” Cullen reminded her.

“No, I haven’t lied, but if it meant keeping them safe…” Athena trailed off and shrugged, “as for the plot, I don’t think he intended to do anything except warn me.”

Cullen shook his head, “You always see the good in people.”

“Not always,” Athena looked away from them, guilt washing over her.

“No?” Leliana asked.

“The only reason I was upset with how Brenna originally almost died, was because I thought she was an innocent. She may have been a good person at one time, but by the time I met her, nothing remained... I don’t get the impression from Timson that he could turn on us or be mean spirited. I think he’s just young, foolish, and hopefully he’s learned his lesson,” Athena looked out the window as a ball of energy flew by, “I’ve said what I think. It’s between you two to decide. I’m going to go see what’s going on outside…” And she abandoned Curly and Nightingale.

Leliana chuckled, “Josie never should have taught her how to delegate.”

“She hasn’t really had a chance to talk to Ana since we rescued her,” Cullen said.

“No she hasn’t. I think she’s right about Timson, he could be an asset. Plus, he will be a lot easier to watch if he stays,” Leliana remarked.

“I want the soldiers to feel as though they can come to me with anything. Especially an assassination attempt against Athena. He didn’t do that,” Cullen got up to pace.

“What kind of a soldier is he?” Leliana asked.

“He's a new recruit. There’s potential, but it hasn't been realized yet. And word has already gotten around in the barracks…” Cullen trailed off.

“So, it’s he stays on as a spy, or he gets kicked out to save his life,” Leliana finished.

Cullen nodded. He walked over to the window so he could watch his lady love play, “Athena thinks this is my decision. If he is to have any chance at redeeming himself… Or even living, he can’t stay a soldier with the Inquisition.”

“We need more scouts in this area anyway,” Leliana said.

Cullen chuckled, “So, he’s not coming back to Skyhold.” 

"I wanted to kill him, too," Leliana said quietly, “but there’s a reason Athena is the Inquisitor. Do you want me to tell him?” 

“No, we’ll go together,” Curly moved away from the window. 

Athena noticed as they walked out of the door and waved. Then she was knocked over by a running Ana. Cullen chuckled. Leliana teased, “You two should really start working on having children.”

“Maker’s breath!” Cullen blushed. Leliana laughed.

Sparkler and I were guarding Timson when Nightingale and Curly showed up. Sparkler noticed Cullen first, “I swear that man has a death wish.”

“At least he looks calm,” I responded.

Leliana spoke first, “We’ll take over now, gentlemen, thank you.”

We waited for them outside the chantry as they told Timson that he could remain part of the Inquisition but as a spy instead of a soldier and that he would not be returning to Skyhold. All three came out, which shocked me, “You’re letting him go?”

“Timson is going to be one of my agents here in South Reach,” Leliana said as Timson wisely disappeared.

“Who’s decision was that?” Dorian asked.

“It was recommended by the Inquisitor,” Leliana answered.

“How did you not kill him, Curly?” I needed to know.

“It took a lot of personal restraint,” Cullen almost growled.

“Where was that restraint last night?” I asked. 

“Clouded in anger,” Curly responded softly.

“You scared Athena last night, Commander,” Dorian said softly.

“I know,” Cullen’s guilt was evident.

“Do you trust her?” I already knew the answer, but I needed to hear him say it.

“Of course I trust her!” Curly was insulted by my question.

“Then let her heal you,” I emphatically stated.

As we approached the house, Leliana asked, “A moment, Commander?”

Sparkler and I went around back to the garden where laughter was coming from as they stayed out front. Leliana asked, “Why haven’t you asked Athena to take away the pain?”

“Because it’s not something that occurs to me,” Cullen answered.

“You asked Cassandra to watch you and name a replacement for you if needed. Why not do something similar with Athena?” 

“Because I should be the one caring for her. She’s finally free of going in to battle every day, and I would like her to enjoy that,” Cullen rubbed his neck.

“She can’t do that if the man she loves is waging war on himself and refusing allies,” Leliana said gently.

Cullen closed his eyes, “I understand.”

“Good. Now, I have shoes that need to be tried on,” Leliana disappeared in to the house.

As Cullen came around the back of the house, he saw Athena tickling Ana and he chuckled. Hearing him, she looked up, “No Leliana?”

“She’s trying on the shoes you two bought,” he said. 

Mia brought out brownies for everyone and Ana rushed over to her, leaving Athena to walk over to Cullen breathless, “What did you and Leliana decide?”

“Timson is to stay in South Reach as one of Leliana’s agents,” Cullen answered.

“Good.”

"Did you find anything out about Ana’s parents?” Curly asked.  
Athena sighed in frustration, “No… Do we still have Brenna’s letters to Timson?”

“I believe so, why?” Cullen asked as they sat on a bench holding hands.

“Because, I think Ana is Darius’ daughter,” Athena said.

“What makes you think that?” 

“She looks so much like him,” Athena answered, “and he absolutely adores her.”

After eating her brownie Ana came to tug on Athena's hand to play. Athena laughed and shook her head, “No, you’ve wore me out. Dorian is very ticklish.”

Ana’s eyes lit up on hearing that, and they got even brighter on seeing Curly, “Is this Commander Cullen?”

“It is,” Athena smiled at her.

“I’ve heard so much about you!” 

“How?” Cullen asked as Ana squeezed herself between them.

“Before my mom started drinking the red stuff, she let me read my father’s letters. She even let me write back to him a couple times… But when she started drinking the red stuff she burned all the letters I wrote to him,” Ana responded.

Athena closed her eyes to hide the tears flooding them on hearing this. Cullen asked gently, “Did your mother ever tell you your father’s name?”

“No, but she did say he was second in command with the Inquisition and that he’s a Templar. I lived with my grandparents until they died, my mom had come back shortly before then,” Ana answered.

“Grandparents?” Athena was confused as it didn’t work with what Brenna had said.

“My mom said that my grandma had remarried when she was little.”

“Oh.”

Darius came over, “How are you feeling, Commander?”

"Were you sick?” Ana looked up at Cullen.

“A little, but I’m better now,” Cullen smiled down at her.

“My mom got sick a lot before she started taking the red stuff. She said it was because she stopped using something to make her magic stronger. When she got sick she would go to a healer to take away the pain. Do you do that?” Ana asked.

Athena looked at Cullen patiently waiting for an answer. Darius smiled, “I think you’ve asked enough questions, Ana.”

Cullen chuckled, “She’s fine, Darius. I haven’t yet,” He paused, looking at Athena, “but I think I may.”

Athena shook her head, “Of all the things to convince you…”

“You can thank Leliana later,” Cullen said quietly, kissing her.

“Ew! Their kissing! Just like you and Dorian do!” Ana hopped off the bench and ran away from Darius. Unfortunately, Darius had help in the form of Sparkler and I cutting her off. We were rewarded with being tickled for it.

With everyone else distracted, Cullen and Athena disappeared to their bedroom to steal a private moment. As the door closed Athena sighed, and started to ask, “What you said…”

“Just the pain though?” Cullen asked.

“Cullen, that’s all I can do. I can’t take away the thoughts or your feelings, but the physical part I can at least lessen,” Athena wrapped her arms around him. She closed her eyes and listened to his heart beat and whispered, “Thank you.”

Cullen held her, “Why are you thanking me?”

“For trusting me,” Athena looked up at him.

Cullen unwrapped himself from her embrace and holding on to her hands he led her to the bed, “Athena, it wasn’t that I didn’t trust you… You have had to fight in so many battles, I didn’t think it was right to ask you to continue to battle so you could help me fight mine.”

“So, what changed?” 

“Leliana made an excellent point and Ana just made it more obvious.”

“What did Leliana say?” Athena asked.

Cullen sighed, “That you wouldn’t be able to enjoy being free from battles because of seeing me fight a war on my own and that I was refusing allies.”

Athena had tears in her eyes, “I should go back and buy the entire shoe store for her.”

“You know, you’re supposed to be happy about this,” he wiped away a tear that escaped her violet eyes.

“I’m ecstatic… Next time I can’t get through to you, I’m going straight to her,” Athena got on her knees and leaned forward to kiss him.

“That’s not fair,” Cullen wrapped his arms around her as he laid on the bed, pulling her down with him.

“I never said it was fair. I said I was doing it,” She kissed his exposed chest.

“She also said that we should work on having children,” Cullen whispered seductively as he flipped Athena to be under him.

“Then I guess we should listen to her,” Athena whispered.

**

“Are you sure you want to read these? They get brutal,” Sparkler sat beside Athena with a stack of papers in his hand.

“We need to find out who Ana’s parents are. I was hoping that there might be clues,” Athena said.

“She seems happy with Darius. Shouldn’t we just leave it as it is?” I asked.

“No, every child deserves to know who their parents are… And I’d be willing to bet that Brenna lied to Darius when she told him Ana wasn’t his,” Athena looked pointedly at me.

“I understand, Duchess. Where’s Curly?”

“He’s talking to his sisters,” Athena took some letters from Dorian.

“I’m sure that’s going over well,” Sparkler quipped.

Athena chuckled, “Talking to Mia, he’ll be fine. Rosalie, I’m not so sure about-”

“Maker’s breath, Rosalie! You’re a mother now, you can’t just follow him to the ends of the world!” There was a pause, “if you would just let me finish!”

Dorian, Athena, and I started laughing. Leliana came in from playing with Ana, “What are you doing?”

“Trying to find out who Ana’s parents are,” Athena wiped tears of laughter away.

“Odd… The letters I read weren’t very funny,” Nightingale quipped.

“Andraste preserve me! Rosalie! Stop it!” They heard Cullen shouting from the other room.

Which, of course, sent us in to gales of laughter again. Athena was the first to recover, “That is what we are laughing at.”

“Athena, shouldn’t you be rescuing him from that?” Dorian asked.

“I offered to to talk to her with him, he refused,” Athena responded quietly as she was studying one of the letters.

“When do we leave for Skyhold?” Sparkler asked looking out of the window as Darius ran by.

"Soon. Cullen and I would like to...” Athena trailed off as she noticed something about the letter she was holding.

“Athena?” Leliana asked. Athena stood and held the letter up to the window, where we could make out what Ana wrote to her father. “How did you see that?”

“One of the mages in my circle would always pull pranks, using disappearing ink, make you think you misplaced something, using fireworks as an alarm… The thing is, if you press too hard on the paper the ink won’t completely disappear. A child wouldn’t understand that they have to press lightly. So, there were marks that didn’t make any sense, and I got curious,” Athena shrugged.

“Can you make out who it’s addressed to?” I asked.

Athena smiled slowly, “It looks like Darius to me…”

Leliana stood and started reading it, “Dear Darius, Mommy tells me that you’re my daddy and that you are a templar. Tell me more about them and you? Love, Ana”

“Duchess, sometimes I wonder if Cole isn’t rubbing off on you.”

“What does that mean?” 

“It was your idea to go through the letters, and less than five minutes later, you found the answer. That’s… Well… Normal for you,” I corrected myself.

Leliana laughed, “Forgot who she is, Varric?”

Athena sighed and rolled her eyes, “I’d be better off in there talking with Rosalie and Cullen.”

Cullen came out of the kitchen with a frustrated sigh and saw that Athena was still holding the paper to the window, “Why-“ he paused, “I don’t want to know.”

Leliana laughed at him, “Athena found out who Ana’s father is. Her past didn’t try to kill her this time.” 

Cullen fought a smile, “That’s not funny.” 

“That’s where you’re wrong, Curly,” I chuckled.

Athena had been looking at the stack of letters and then she looked up and saw Cullen, “Hi!”

“Athena, you can stop papering the windows now…” Cullen tried not to chuckle.

Athena blushed and took the paper off the window, “If I wanted to read what was hidden I had to have it in sunlight.”

“Sparkler’s always asking Seeker about posing for a painting. Maybe he should have you pose for one instead,” I teased.

Cullen warned, “Dwarf.”

“No, thanks,” Athena offered the letter to Dorian, “Would you like to take this to Darius?”

“You knew?” Sparkler thought he had been doing so well.

“I suspected. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“A Tevinter Mage with a Southern Templar? What would the gossips say?” Sparkler had a sad, knowing smile.

“You know I would have fought beside you.” Athena reminded him.

“You had enough battles to fight. I’ll take this to him, the Commander may lose his second in command though,” Sparkler smiled sadly. His cousin was the best.

“Why?” Cullen asked.

“Because he wants to stay with Ana,” Sparkler looked out at the window as Ana was tossed into the air by her father.

“And the hidden message was that he’s her father…” Curly trailed off. Athena secretly smiled, a plan forming.

“What are you thinking?” Cullen walked over to her.

“That they can both come to Skyhold, if they wish,” Athena looked up at him.

Cullen kissed her, “I’m okay with that.” 

Dorian walked to the door to call Darius and Ana in. When they came in Athena asked Ana, “Do you like cookies?”

“I love cookies!” Ana took hold of Athena’s hand.

“Mia makes the best cookies, would you like to come to the kitchen with me and get some?” Athena winked at Cullen.

“Yes, please!” Ana started pulling on her hand. 

While Ana was distracted in the kitchen, Cullen told Darius of what was discussed and handed him the letter that Athena was holding against the window. Cullen finished with, “You and Ana are welcome at Skyhold, if you wish.” 

Darius looked at Dorian and then looked at Curly, “Thank you Commander, but that’s going to be decided by Ana.”

“I understand,” Cullen nodded.

As Athena and Ana came back into the sitting room, Duchess got on her knees in front of the little girl and said softly, “I believe Darius may have some news for you, Ana.”

Ana released Athena’s hand and walked over to Darius. Darius told her about being her father and about the offer to live at Skyhold. Ana asked, “What’s Skyhold?”

“Skyhold is the main base of operations for the Inquisition. It’s where I’ve lived for the past couple years.” Darius said.

“Are there other children there?” Ana asked.

“Yes, there are,” Darius answered.

“How far away is it?”

“About a week’s ride.”

“So, I’m going to go on an adventure?” Ana asked excitedly. Everyone but Darius chuckled softly.

“Are you sure you want to go? I can’t promise we’ll be back this way,” Darius explained.

“I wasn’t allowed friends here, and…” Ana trailed off.

“There’s nothing left for her here,” Athena whispered with tears in her eyes. 

While Darius and Ana were talking Duchess had found a seat on the armrest of Curly’s chair. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled out of her own memories, Athena smiled at him.

“I want to go to Skyhold,” Ana said.

“Does this mean we actually get to enjoy the rest of our vacation?” Athena asked Curly.

“Not quite yet. I have a chess game that I need to get in with the Commander,” Dorian said before Cullen could respond.

Mia laughed, and got out the chess board and pieces. Rosalie said her goodbyes and took the baby home, where Timson greeted her. About half way through the game Sparkler started in on what Timson thought of Curly. Athena and Cullen shared a secret smile, which I caught. Whispering to Duchess, I chastised, “You should let Sparkler have at least one thing to use against Curly. You know he can’t win any other way.”

Athena chuckled and said nothing. Ana, however, said, “Dorian, you shouldn’t move there.”

“Can you believe this?! I have a ten year old telling me where my pieces should go,” he paused, thinking he was going in for the kill, “But at least she’s not comparing me to the Maker unlike a former soldier did to you,” Sparkler smiled wickedly at Curly.

Curly smirked, “Check mate.”

“How-?!” Sparkler was dumbfounded.

“I told you that you shouldn’t move there, Dorian,” Ana smirked.

“Next time I’ll listen to you, Ana.” Dorian rounded on Athena, “You told him!”

“You waited until the last move!” Athena fired back, laughing.

“I’ve had a rough day,” Sparkler complained, “Even though Darius and Ana will be at Skyhold, it looks as though I may have to go home sooner than I wanted to.”

“You don’t sound happy about that…” Athena watched her cousin play with a chess piece.

“I’m not, but my uncle sent my name to some of his contacts, and they want to meet with me,” Dorian looked at her with sad, brown eyes, “I’m sorry, Athena.”

Athena shook her head, refusing his apology, “You’ve talked for a while about going home. I understand. Are you going to come back to Skyhold with us?”

“Of course. Most of my clothes are still there,” Sparkler smiled at her.

Athena yawned, “I’m going to bed.”

"Since when do you admit that you’re tired?” I asked.

“Since I spent the past few days with not that much sleep,” Athena half joked.

“We did that all the time during the war,” I teased.

Cullen closed his eyes, “Maker’s breath.”

Athena stood, “We’re not at war anymore, and it didn’t take long to get used to sleeping again, in a bed, with blankets, and pillows…”

“And a warm body?” Leliana teased.

“And… Goodnight,” Athena blushed. However, Cullen was still sitting and he wasn’t letting go of her hand, “You can sleep in the chair… I’m not.” 

Cullen stood, “Says the one who sleeps on the ground because she can’t put a cot together.”

Athena gasped and turned around to face him, “It wasn’t part of my training at the circle. There were Templars for doing stuff like that.”

“You are going to pay for that,” Cullen growled.

“Not if you can’t catch me,” Athena pulled her hand from his grasp and ran up the stairs. Cullen chased her and our laughter followed them.


	30. Chapter 30

Athena woke as the sun rose and slowly started to get dressed. The queasy feeling was back. She looked lovely in a green velvet dress that reached her ankles and hugged her arms. Athena heard Cullen sit up as he woke and she half smiled, “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” Curly smiled back and saw how slowly his love was moving, “Are you feeling all right?”

“I feel a little ill,” Athena brushed her hair.

“Do you want to go to a healer?” Cullen got dressed in a beige shirt and buff colored pants.

“No. If it’s anything like the past several days, it’ll go away in a few minutes.”

Cullen kissed her, “If you’re certain…”

“Do you think we’ll get lucky enough to have a relaxed day today?” She hopefully asked.

“I certainly hope so,” He chuckled softly as they made their way to the kitchen for breakfast.

Breakfast was amazing with crepes, bacon, cheese, and vegetables. It was unlike most Fereldan breakfasts. Which surprised Leliana when she walked in, “What is this?”

“Breakfast,” Athena quipped.

“But it’s not that gruel stuff,” Leliana was overly cautious. 

Mia gagged, “That stuff does not come into my house.”

Cullen laughed and asked Duchess what she would like to do for the day. Athena thought for a bit, “Go to the meadow again?”

“Of course,” He kissed her. We had to tease the cute couple. They blushed and beat a hasty retreat to the meadow after breakfast.

They walked hand in hand, quietly enjoying each other’s company until they reached the meadow. Cullen looked down at his fiancee and asked, “May I have this dance, my lady?”

Athena smiled and accepted. After a couple turns around the meadow filled with heather, she started to look a little pale and asked if they could stop. That really worried Cullen, “I think you should see a healer.”

“It’s just a little stomach illness, I’ll be fine,” Athena reassured him.

“I spent years throwing you into the path of everything imaginable. Now that I have you mostly to myself, allow me to be a little protective of you?” Cullen cupped her cheek.

“So long as I’m allowed the same of you,” Athena answered softly as she lost herself in his touch.

“I would like that,” Cullen bent down to kiss her.

On their way back they would stop every few steps to kiss or have Athena get excited over a dog, cat, or child. Which Curly couldn’t help but laugh at. They arrived in time for lunch where Cullen announced, “Tomorrow we leave for Skyhold.”

“Which means an afternoon of packing,” Leliana quipped.

“How much stuff did you bring?” Sparkler asked.

“She needs a trunk for just her shoes,” Cullen teased.

Athena laughed. I was shocked, “Since when do you tease?”

“Who’s teasing? You didn’t see the bags of shoes she brought back,” Cullen winked at his lady love.

“I can fit everything in one trunk,” Leliana griped.

“Darius, have you been able to get all of Ana’s stuff?” Athena asked.

“I have, thank you for asking,” Darius smiled.

“Mia, we’ll get packed up and get out of your hair, so you can have dinner with Cullen and Athena,” Dorian said.

Mia smiled, “Thank you. I’ll let Rosalie and Branson know.”

Cullen finished eating first and stood. “Where are you off to?” I asked.

“I need to let the soldiers that are returning with us know that they should be ready to move out in the morning,” Cullen answered.

“Would you like some company on the walk to the barracks?” Athena had barely touched her food.

“You didn’t eat very much,” Mia commented.

“I think I have a slight stomach illness, and I usually don’t eat a lot. Much to the chagrin of most everyone I know,” Athena responded as she waited for Curly to answer.

Cullen smiled at her, “If you’re feeling up to it, I would love your company.”

“Just remember Athena, Josie isn’t here to pack your trunk for you,” Leliana teased.

“I never wanted to bring along a trunk,” Athena griped as they left.

The walk to the barracks was a quiet one of Curly and Athena holding hands. Cullen told the soldiers to be prepared to leave at first light and the lovers left the barracks. Athena asked, “Could we go to the meadow one last time?”

Cullen smiled, “No dancing.”

“Why not?”

“Because we can’t lose track of time, and I don’t want you getting ill again,” Cullen answered.

“Fine,” Athena playfully pouted. When they got to the meadow, Athena picked a few of the flowers.

Cullen watched her, “Do you like flowers?”

“I like these,” Athena smelled the ones she picked.

“They match your eyes,” Cullen said softly. 

Athena kissed him in thanks, “I’m ready now.”

They went back to Mia’s, slowly strolling along. Upon entering, they saw Timson. Cullen sighed wearily. Athena kissed his cheek and whispered, “I love you.”

Mia, who was not pleased that Timson was there, saw Athena’s flowers, “You like the heather too. Let’s get a vase and put them in water.”

Athena followed Mia in to the kitchen and put her flowers in water and they went out to join the tense situation in the sitting room. Since Cullen had not moved from coming in, Mia suggested, “Why don’t you and Athena go up and pack. I’ll let you know when Branson arrives.”

“Great idea,” Athena grabbed and tugged on Curly’s hand to get him to move. Once they were safely ensconced in their room Athena said as she packed, “One more night, and remember Rosalie loves him.”

Cullen sighed heavily, “She actually tried to convince me to take them all back to Skyhold with us…”

“Is that what the argument was about yesterday?”

“Yes,” Cullen sat down on the bed.

Athena shook her head, “The baby wouldn’t survive the trip.”

“That’s what I told her. The only thing that convinced her was that the soldiers knew what Timson did and he wouldn’t survive the trip either,” Cullen got up to help her, “I’m so glad you don’t have siblings.”

“Only a cousin and a father,” she chuckled.

“Dorian’s bad enough,” he teased.

“Then you should stop playing chess with him,” she threw a shirt at him.

“But then how I would I hear of all the things you don’t tell me?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“I’ve been pretty good about informing you of stuff since Corypheus was defeated.”

“True,” Cullen took the clothing she had in her hands and tossed it on the bed as he kissed her.

She moaned, leaning in to him, "We can't." 

Cullen picked her up, and whispered seductively “Yes, we can.”

And then they heard a door slam and Mia yell, “Branson, don’t!” 

Cullen gently set her back on the floor with a heavy sigh. Athena grabbed his hand, “We’ll continue that after dinner.”

They came down the stairs to Branson getting his hand wrapped, Rosalie crying, and Timson holding his face. Athena looked up at Cullen and whispered, “Thank you.”

Cullen smiled, and went to check on his brother while Athena looked at Timson, “Do you want me to get the healer?”

“Why can’t you?” Rosalie asked. 

Athena glanced at Cullen first before answering, “Timson’s cheekbone is broken, and I can’t heal adult broken bones without taking the injury on for myself.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. I think you just don’t want to,” Rosalie huffed.

“That’s how my magic works,” Athena shrugged, briefly wondering why Rosalie didn’t believe her.

Cullen looked as though he was ready to explode on his sister for doubting Duchess… It wasn’t all that long ago that Athena was delivering Rosalie’s baby. Mia felt the anger radiating from her brother and commanded, “Rosalie, take Timson to the healer.”

After Rosalie and Timson left, Cullen muttered, “Ungrateful, selfish…”

Athena heard him and said softly, “Cullen, it’s all right, most mages would be able to.”

“You’re not most mages,” Curly grumbled.

“You and I know that, but Rosalie doesn’t,” Athena, the peacemaker, peacekeeper, most of the time chose to see the best in people, reminded her love.

“You will soon be our sister in law, Rosalie shouldn’t have tried to guilt you,” Branson joined in.

“And we will talk to her,” Mia raised an eyebrow at her younger brothers, as Curly had taken to pacing to let go of his anger.  
Cullen sighed and then he half chuckled, “I’ve been wanting to do that for days.”

“Branson, can I see your hand?” Athena asked.

“Sure,” Branson held it out, “I thought you couldn’t heal broken bones.”

“I can, I just would suffer for it for a while. And your hand isn’t broken. I can heal you at least, if you want me to?” Athena offered.

Branson nodded his assent, the air around his hand glowed gold for a minute and his hand was as good as new. He thanked her.

“We’ve worked through all of our issues now, yes?” Mia asked.

“Mia, I know you’re not happy about Rosalie being with Timson… Why is he here?” Cullen asked. 

“He says he loves her and intends to marry her,” Mia shrugged.

Rosalie and Timson came back, the meal was quiet and tense with Cullen and Branson alternately glaring at Timson when they thought the ladies weren’t watching. After dinner Cullen said, “Mia, dinner was lovely, but Athena and I have an early start tomorrow.” 

“I understand. We’ll be up to see you two off,” Mia hugged them both before they went up the stairs.

“Where did we leave off?” Cullen asked as he shut the door.

“We were packing,” Athena teased as she turned to face him.

Cullen grabbed a large armful of clothes and dumped it in one of the trunks, “Better?”

“Much,” Athena seductively replied, laying down on the bed with her auburn hair splayed out beside her.

“That looks more familiar,” Cullen took off his shirt and got on the bed with her and kissed her. They finished packing after they made love, of course, they stopped frequently to kiss. 

Cullen and Athena said goodbye to his siblings, without any issues except for challenging each other to chess matches (Timson wisely stayed away.) Mia did hand Athena a satchel of cookies and some dried heather, which was rewarded with a hug. 

**

When we broke for camp that night Athena tried to stay in her tent. I protested, “Duchess, it hasn’t been that long since we traveled together. Get out here!” (Curly was on the other side of the camp.)

She came out, pale and grumbling, “I was reading.”

“You can read all you want back at Skyhold,” I quipped.

“You know, Varric, sometimes people enjoy having time to themselves,” Leliana sat beside Athena who was holding a hand to her stomach.

Athena chuckled, “This is nothing new. For a writer you would think he’d want people to read.”

“What were you reading about?” Dorian asked.

“Lyrium.”

“Find anything?” I filled my cup with ale.

“No, I wasn’t able to read a page before you started yelling for me,” Athena subtly eyed my cup with trepidation.

“Sorry, Duchess,” I poked the fire. 

“It’s okay, I know better than to try and read when you’re awake,” Athena teased.

“That’s why there was always light in your tent,” Sparkler said.

Athena blushed a little and changed the subject, “How’s Ana?”

“Sleeping. She’s excited to be going to Skyhold.”

“Why didn’t you say anything about not being able to sleep?” I asked Athena.

Athena chuckled, “It had nothing to do with that. I just needed time to myself.”

“You still didn’t sleep very much,” Dorian said.

“Who could when you slept on the ground?” Leliana teased.

Athena shrugged, “Tents and blankets were an improvement.”

“From Ostwick to Haven?” Nightingale gently pried.

Athena nodded and watched Cullen walk toward us, a smile playing at her lips. Leliana bumped shoulders with her, “You sleep better now, yes?”

Athena blushed, “Yes.”

“Good,” Nightingale smiled.

Cullen sighed as he sat beside Athena, “I’m starting to think Darius was right about waking up the new recruits with water.”

“They’re already falling asleep?” Leliana was shocked.

“No, they’re complaining about having to be woken up.”

"It's not going to be just you and Darius again, is it?” Athena was worried.

“No, and it’s shorter shifts this time,” Cullen said. Athena breathed a sigh of relief.

"You’re their Commander, you don't have to take the night watches. We didn’t have them unless Seeker was along,” I said.

“Athena has already informed me of that,” Curly griped. He was none too pleased with our lack of security, “And what would that say to the soldiers? That I’m above doing the least favorite tasks just because I’m their leader? That’s not right.”

“They haven’t been through what you’ve been through,” Leliana said quietly.

“And that makes me better than them somehow?” Cullen asked. In the heated discussion, no one noticed that Duchess was becoming very uncomfortable with the topic.

“Not better, but you’re in charge. If you don’t have a clear head, who’s going to tell them what to do?” Sparkler returned.

“What are your thoughts, Duchess?” I brought the too quiet one in to the conversation.

Athena shook her head, refusing to participate in the conversation. Cullen kissed her and whispered, “Thank you.” And then so everyone could hear, “I’ve gone on little to no sleep before and have been perfectly fine.” 

Athena closed her eyes, not liking where this was going. I was quite perturbed by Curly’s comment, “Was this before or after you stopped taking lyrium?”

“Varric, not here, not now,” Athena warned quietly, opening her eyes and looking directly at me.

“Duchess, the soldiers have known for at least a year now,” I argued.

"This is not something to be discussed in the open,” Athena hissed, her violet eyes getting very intense and her posture was defensive.

“She’s right,” Leliana said and changed the subject, “Athena, what did Mia give you?”

“Chocolate chip cookies and some dried heather,” Athena visibly relaxed with the change in subject. She looked at Cullen, “When do you go on watch?”

“An hour before sunrise,” Cullen answered.

Athena whispered in Curly’s ear, “Should we see if we can break another cot?”

“I hope you have a good night,” Cullen pulled Athena up with him and they disappeared in to their tent. 

After making love Cullen held Athena and asked, “Why didn’t you join in on the interrogation of me tonight?”

“Because I would rather talk to you privately about it.” Athena lifted her head from his chest so she could look at him, “They’re not wrong.”

“Athena, it’s not how I work,” Cullen tensed, not certain that he was going to like this discussion.

“I know. But, by what you said tonight, I should be taking part in the night watches too,” Athena’s tone was gentle.

“Absolutely not,” Cullen commanded as he moved to sit up. Now, he knew was not going to like this conversation.

"Why not?"

“Because you’re not a soldier, among other reasons.” 

“But I am the Inquisitor… And what other reasons?” She sat beside him as she wrapped a blanket around herself.

“All the more reason for you to not to. And the other glaring reason is because you’re still getting ill,” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her, daring her to deny it.

“My getting ill at times isn’t that debilitating. The Commander of the Inquisition doesn’t have a target on his back? How safe is it for you to be out there, the only one awake?” Athena argued, trying desperately to not get upset.

“It’s not safe for anyone, but the alternatives are worse,” Cullen was very matter of fact.

Athena sighed, knowing that she wasn’t going to change his mind. Truthfully, she didn’t want to, she just wanted him to see everyone’s point of view, and told him so. “Cullen, I understand. I also know that I’m not going to change your mind on this. But, they care about you too, and that’s where all the questions were coming from. I just want you to see that they have a point.”

Cullen sighed, and changed the subject…kind of, “You didn’t seem very happy when Varric brought up lyrium.”

“I wasn’t. It’s not something that should be used against you nor should it be brought up when we’re in the middle of nowhere,” Athena answered.

Cullen kissed her and whispered, “Thank you.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Cullen smiled mischievously, “Should we try to break the cot again?”

Athena chuckled, “Yes.”

**

Cullen woke up a couple hours before dawn, so did Athena. Getting dressed as she stretched, he said, “You should be sleeping.”

She chuckled at him, “You know I get up close to sunrise. Plus, it’ll give me time to read before Varric starts yelling for me.”

Cullen shook his head, “He wouldn’t do that.”

Athena laughed, “They were behaving themselves when we went to Samson’s headquarters. He’s not behaving himself now.”

“He’s not that bad,” Cullen defended me. (I appreciate that, truly… But Duchess was right.)

“You’ll see,” Athena wrapped herself in a blanket, and stood to kiss him, “Go on your watch.”

As soon as I was out of my tent, I was calling for her, only not for the reason she expected. When she came out, I said, “I’m sorry for last night.”

“You’re not teasing me over wanting to read?” She was, understandably, very suspicious. Duchess knows me too well.

“No, you were right, I shouldn’t have brought up lyrium,” I was trying to not blush.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to,” Athena reminded me softly.

“Where is Curly?” I asked. 

“The last time I saw him was right before he went on watch,” she answered and thanked a soldier for her plate of food. She looked at like it was going to bite her.

“And you didn’t go with him?!” I was shocked, astounded, flabbergasted.

Athena chuckled, “No, the last time I did that I proved to be more of a distraction than any actual help.”

“Not true, my lady,” Darius said with a barely awake Ana in tow, “I didn’t find you distracting at all.”

Athena laughed at him, “I’m sure if Dorian had been along…”

Sparkler grumbled as he came out of his tent, “I will never understand the desire to get up at sunrise.”

“Because it’s quiet, peaceful, and my favorite time of day,” Athena smiled at her bedraggled cousin.

We fell quiet for several minutes, but Curly still hadn’t shown up. I couldn’t resist asking, “Shouldn’t Curly be here by now?”

“I’m going back to my tent,” Athena stood.

“And leave such enjoyable company?” Darius asked.

“You and Ana can come with,” Athena smiled at him.

“What did I do?!” Sparkler exclaimed, shocked that he was being left out of Duchess’s little soiree.

“I’m not getting blamed for another search party,” Athena teased, about to leave. Then she groaned as she saw two soldiers carrying a bucket full of water, “Darius, was anyone woken up with water last night?”

“Yes, why?” Darius was confused as to why she would be asking.

“I’m going to go find towels,” Athena put down her untouched food and disappeared in to her tent.

“Why do I feel as though I’m missing something?” Sparkler asked no one in particular.

“They wouldn’t!” Darius exclaimed, finally understanding what Duchess was thinking. A loud roar was heard from the other side of the camp, and two terrified soldiers ran and tripped over everything in their way. He groaned, “They did.”

Sparkler and I started laughing. Leliana came out of her tent with bow and arrows in hand hearing the ruckus, “What’s going on?”

“It appears our Commander fell asleep on the night watch, and a couple of his soldiers decided to wake him up by pouring water on him,” I was breathless from laughing so much.

Leliana smirked, “Where’s Athena?” 

"Getting towels," Darius informed her.

“Wise woman, though I doubt he’d go near her as angry as he is,” Nightingale said. Athena came out of the tent with towels in hand and walked to the other side of the camp. Leliana chuckled, “Brave woman.”

Athena stood, watching a soaking wet Cullen pace for a while, trying her hardest not to laugh. She succeeded, but she couldn’t hide the smile when he turned to glower at her. She offered Curly a towel, “Hi.”

Curly took the towel and started to dry his face, mumbling, “Hi,” through it. 

Athena put the other towel around his shoulders, and with a low and sultry tone, she teased, “You should have told me you were going for a swim.” 

Cullen growled and pulled her tight against him, “Very funny, Athena.”

Athena chuckled, “So, your revenge is getting me wet too?”

Cullen smiled wickedly, “Yes.”

“I guess it’s a good thing I don’t mind being wet,” Athena kissed him.

“Why?” He used the towel on his shoulders to dry his hair.

“Because I would have to change in to a dress to ride…” Athena paused, and had a wicked smile of her own light her features, “Or I could ride naked.”

Cullen growled, “You’re not helping.”

“Oh, but I am," Athena whispered seductively.

“Right now the only way you’re helping is if you want to reach Skyhold a day later,” Cullen proved his point by pulling her tighter against him.

Athena laughed, “No, you would end up killing someone.”

"Yes, Johan and a new recruit.”

Athena took his hand as they started to walk back to their tent so Curly could change, “I was thinking Varric and Dorian, but they work too…” Athena paused, imagining the epic teasing they would get from me, “We may want to have private dinners until we’re back in Skyhold.”

Of course they had to walk through camp to get to their tent, and applause followed them. Curly was not pleased. Athena was biting her lip so she wouldn’t laugh. Cullen exasperated, asked, once they were inside their tent, “Do you find this funny?”

Athena chuckled softly, “You’re incredibly attractive when you’re wet.”

Cullen groaned, “Again with the not helping.” 

Athena smiled mischievously at him, “I’ll make it up to you tonight.”

“You better,” Cullen kissed her hard and passionately. Leaving her breathless, he let go of her to change his clothes. They wisely took their meals in their tent, and Curly didn’t do any night watches for the rest of the trip back to Skyhold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Duchess warns: Varric.  
> Me: You’re spending entirely too much time with Curly.  
> Duchess: stares  
> Me: Fine. Hey, readers go take a drink of water, eat (just not snails, or at least brush your teeth before you come back,) or sleep thing.


	31. Chapter 31

The first couple weeks back was hectic, with catching up from being away for a month. I’m not even sure if Duchess and Curly saw each other much for those weeks. Which brings us to Athena’s name day, the First of Wintermarch, also known as First Day. I had to tease her a bit for breakfast, “Even your name-day is weird.”

“I am not the only one that was born on today, it is not weird,” Athena shot back.

“Maybe not by itself, but once you add up all the pieces, it’s weird,” I winked at her.

“Varric,” Athena sighed, having very little patience for my teasing.

“Isn’t there a rule that you’re not allowed to tease the Boss on her name-day?” Bull sat down beside Sparkler.

“If I didn’t tease her, she would think there was something wrong with me,” I quipped.

Athena chuckled at that, pushing the food around on her plate. 

“Not hungry?” Dorian asked, noticing.

“Not really,” Athena looked at her food as though it was moving.

“Duchess, I got used to you eating. It may have only been chocolate chip cookies, but at least it was something,” I pleaded.

“I was hungry, I’m not anymore,” Athena pushed her untouched plate away.

“You’re not allowed to get ill on your name-day. Ruffles would not like having to cancel the get together tonight,” I warned.

“Why would we have to cancel tonight?” Ruffles sat down beside Athena.

“Varric’s being a mother hen,” Sparkler quipped.

“You’re the one that noticed that she’s not eating,” I argued.

"Did you need me for anything, Josie?” Athena tired of Sparkler and I arguing.

“No, I was looking for the Commander though,” Ruffles said.

“He had a meeting,” Athena answered.

“On your name-day?!” I exclaimed, “I thought that we had fixed this working non-stop stuff.”

Athena chuckled, “It’s only one meeting, and then he has the rest of the day.”

“And what are your plans, Athena?” Sparkler asked.

“Until Cullen’s out of his meeting, I’ll probably go to my quarters and read,” Athena replied.

“Such an exciting morning,” I teased.

“Hush, I’m sure there will be more than enough excitement tonight,” Athena reminded me. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll go enjoy a quiet morning.” And she got up and left.

Ruffles looked at Sparkler, “Has she said anything to you about being ill?”

“I’ve barely seen her since we got back. She’s been working almost like the Commander does… Or used to…” Dorian said.

“She looks pale,” Josephine murmured, “She seems to know herself well enough to know when she needs rest…” She sighed with a little dreaminess, “A quiet morning sounds fantastic.”

Cullen didn’t get out of his meeting until after lunch. As soon as Ruffles saw him, she pulled him in to her office, “Has Athena been ill?”

“That would depend on which one of us you ask… Why?” Cullen asked after he closed the door.

“Maybe I’m just worrying too much, but she got breakfast and then didn’t eat it. She looked pale, and she hasn’t come down for lunch yet,” Josephine explained.

“You didn’t have lunch sent to her?” 

“I was so worried about the party tonight that I forgot,” Josephine blushed.

“Are you sure the kitchen staff didn’t do it without you asking them to?” 

“That’s possible, I guess,” Josephine sat at her desk to go over the invitation list for the evening’s festivities.

“I will find a way to get word to you,” Cullen said as he made his way to the door.

"Thank you, we can cancel tonight if she doesn’t feel up to it,” Ruffles offered.

“I’ll let her know,” Cullen made his way to Athena’s chambers and was quite surprised by what he found. There was a book beside her and she was… sleeping. 

He gently pulled her auburn hair out of her face which caused her to shift and murmur something he couldn’t make out. He also saw that lunch had been delivered, but was untouched. Curly left briefly to let a servant know to tell Ruffles that Athena had taken a nap. When he returned Athena was stretching from just waking. Cullen kissed her, “Tired?”

Athena chuckled softly, “Apparently.”

"Josephine is worried about you," he sat beside her on the bed.

“So is Varric.”

“I thought you were starting to feel better?”

“I thought so too.” Athena paused, “I woke up feeling fine, and then when I went to breakfast I didn’t want to eat even though I was hungry, and started to feel kind of ill. So, I came up here to read, and I fell asleep.”

“Was this before or after they brought lunch?”

“They brought lunch?” Athena asked, confused. “What time is it?”

Cullen chuckled, "It’s about one thirty. How did you sleep through all the banging they normally do?”

"I don't know…”

“How are you feeling now?”

“Fine. Hungry…” Athena blushed. 

Cullen laughed, “Good. I haven’t had lunch yet either.” They walked over to the table hand in hand. As they sat down, he asked, “You were able to sleep last night?”

“I slept fine. I missed the sunrise. What time did you leave this morning?” Athena took a bite of her food.

"About an hour before sunrise,” Cullen answered.

“What was the meeting about?”

“Reminding the soldiers of certain rules, and adding a couple new ones.”

“Was one of the new rules about not dumping water on your Commander?” Athena teased. 

“Very funny,” Cullen groused.

Athena smiled, “I enjoyed seeing you wet.”

Cullen shook his head, and changed the subject to something far more preferable (at least in his opinion,) “Josephine said she would cancel the party tonight if you weren’t feeling up to it.”

“No. I feel fine now,” Athena hoped that the stomach illness she thought she had gotten rid of wasn’t coming back.

“What would the most amazing and beautiful woman in all of Thedas like to do with the rest of her name-day?” 

Athena blushed, “Go for a walk, and spend time with you.”

Curly smiled at her, “We have been busy since returning to Skyhold, haven’t we?”

“Yes, we have,” Athena sighed, the busyness of the past couple weeks weighing heavily on her.

Cullen stood and extended a hand, “Shall we go for our walk?”

They walked up to the battlements and to Athena’s tower which surprised her, “I thought this would be the last place we would end up.”

"I wanted to see if they made any progress on it since we left…” Cullen sighed, seeing that it was much the same, “Which they haven’t.”

Athena chuckled at him while she climbed the ladder, “You weren’t here to allay their fears about it being haunted.”

Once they reached the top, he stated, “First thing tomorrow.”

Athena walked away from the ladder and to the far wall looking out at the mountains. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as the wind played with her hair and violet dress.

Cullen crossed his arms and drank in the vision of Athena’s profile against the snow capped mountains. Maker, he loved watching her. 

After several minutes of letting the wind play with her she turned to face Cullen, he smiled at her, “Feeling less restless now?”

Athena chuckled and kissed him, “Yes, I am.”

Cullen took her hand and they walked to the ladder, “Your quarters or mine?”

“I don’t know… There’s less people to get through to get to yours, but we get interrupted a lot there…” Athena weighed her odds.

“We can go to yours,” Cullen offered.

“Then we have to fight through throngs of people,” Athena complained.

Curly chuckled, “That might be best to allay the fears of Varric and Josephine.”

Athena thought for a moment, “True.”

Of course the first people they ran into were Darius and Sparkler. Darius was the first to comment, “Hello, Commander and Inquisitor.”

Sparkler chuckled, “I’d be careful with the titles, Darius. My cousin doesn’t care for them.”

Darius shrugged and smiled at Athena. Athena chuckled, “Don’t you two have plans?”

“We’re on our way there now,” Dorian said with a wicked smile.

Athena laughed helplessly, “All I ask is that you not set anything on fire.”

“It’s good to see that you’re not as…” Sparkler paused, “grumpy now.”

“I was not grumpy!” Athena exclaimed.

“At breakfast you certainly were,” Dorian smirked.

Athena sighed, and turned her attention to Curly’s second in command, “Where’s Ana?”

“In the garden playing with the other children.” Darius said.

“How does she like Skyhold?” Curly asked.

“She loves it,” Darius smiled.

“Good to hear,” Cullen said.

As Dorian and Darius walked away Cullen and Athena heard them plotting to get Nightingale to court someone. Cullen groaned and Athena laughed as they walked in to the main hall. Ruffles smiled hearing Athena laugh, “I trust you’re feeling better?”

“I am, Josie. Thank you,” Athena hugged her friend.

“We’re still on for tonight?” Josephine asked hopefully.

Athena nodded. Cullen had walked away from the ladies to give them a moment.

“I was told that I should keep the gathering small,” Ruffles looked over at Curly.

“You have enough big things to plan,” Athena reassured her.

“Yes, but this is the first celebration of your name-day,” Josephine said.

“Josie, I’m sure I will love it.”

"I certainly hope so. I'll let you go back to enjoying your day," Josephine went in to her office.

Athena walked over to Cullen and took hold of his hand. He smiled down at her and they walked to her quarters to spend the rest of the day together until it was time for the party. 

**

Ruffles had heard of Duchess’ obsession of chocolate chip cookies, so the cake was a giant chocolate chip cookie. I had to tease her, “I was wondering when the chocolate chip cookies were going to show up.”

Athena chuckled, “I’m surprised they’re not in every room.”

“You and me both,” I winked at her.

Curly came over and stole her away from me by asking, “Would you like to dance?”

“Did you pass your illness on to him?” I asked.

“No, why?” 

“Because he’s asking you to dance…” I trailed off.

“You know, Varric, I do have my moments,” Cullen quipped.

Athena laughed at us, “I would love to dance with you,” and off they went. 

“Having a good time?” Curly asked as they spun around the hall.

“I am. Thank you,” Athena smiled up at him.

“I didn’t do anything,” Cullen waged war against a blush. He didn’t win.

“Really? Josie tells a different story,” Athena started to tease.

“I don’t want to know,” Cullen groaned.

“She was very impressed.” Athena’s smile turned mischievous, “She said that you could help plan the engagement party and wedding.”

“Maker’s breath,” He swore, blushing. 

Athena laughed at him, “I’m glad I can still get you to blush.”

He kissed her. We applauded. She blushed, and Curly teased, “It is a nice feeling.”

As the fifth dance ended, Athena became pale, “Would you mind if we sat for a little?”

“Not at all,” Cullen led her back to their seats. Once they were sitting he asked, “Are you feeling all right?”

“Yes… No…” Athena sighed, “I don’t know.” Cullen put his arm around her and waited for more of an explanation, “I feel a little shaky and kind of nauseous.”

“First thing tomorrow you are seeing a healer,” He commanded, tiring of this mystery illness that kept plaguing her.

Athena sighed, “Are you forgetting that I am a healer?”

“Do you know what’s wrong with you?” He returned, just as quick. Athena didn’t answer, and looked down at her hands. Cullen was expecting more of a fight out of her. Now he was really worried, “Did you want to lay down?”

“No! I’m okay now that we’re sitting… I think,” Athena sounded very unsure.

“Athena…” Cullen trailed off, hoping for more of solid explanation.

“I’m sorry, Cullen. I don’t know how to explain it better than that. I wish I did,” She answered his unasked question.

Ruffles noticed that they weren’t dancing anymore and came over to them, “Is everything all right?”

“Everything is fine, Josie. Tonight is beautiful. Thank you,” Athena said.

“But you’re not dancing, and you look pale,” Josephine trailed off, worried.

“Hopefully, it’s a weird stomach illness that will go away,” Athena reassured her friend. Cullen was unable or unwilling to hide his snort.

“Most everyone is going back to their quarters now. Please don’t feel as though you have to stay,” Ruffles explained.

“Thank you, Josephine,” Cullen said.

“You’re welcome, Commander,” Ruffles moved away to start the clean up effort.

“Let’s go upstairs,” Cullen stood and held out a hand for her.

Athena took his hand and stood. They made their way to her quarters. Once there, they walked out on to the east balcony.   
Athena leaned against Cullen with her back to him, and he wrapped his arms around her. They stood like that for several minutes looking out at the stars that twinkled down at them. Athena sighed and closed her eyes feeling very relaxed, protected, and loved. Cullen smiled at hearing her sigh, a soothing balm on his worry for her, and said softly, “I have something for you.”

Athena turned in his embrace to look at him, “Cullen?”

He released her to pull out a long, slender box from behind him and opened it to reveal a beautiful but simple necklace that had a pendant of a heart wearing a crown with two hands holding it. Athena smiled at him, “It’s beautiful, thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Cullen responded as he clasped the necklace around her delicate neck, “Are you feeling better?”

“Yes,” She stood on tiptoe to kiss him. She took him by the hand, pulling him to the bed.

“Do you have something in mind?” Cullen allowed her to lead him.

“I do,” she said with a sultry tone of voice. He groaned, kissing her and pushing her back on the bed. They passionately made love to end Athena’s name day.

**

A few days went by with Athena still unable to figure out what was afflicting her. Curly was finally irritated and worried enough after her getting and not eating breakfast for the seventh time in a row, “Athena, whatever this is, it is only getting worse. You need to go to a healer.”

“I’ve been to a healer, almost every day since it doesn’t seem to be going away. By the time I get there or they come to me… I’m feeling better. They don’t have any idea either,” Athena understood his worry as she was beginning to be worried herself.

Cullen sighed, feeling very conflicted, “I have meetings all day. I’ll cancel them.”

“Cullen, I’ll be fine. I always end up feeling better, and I promise I’ll take it easy,” Athena tried to reassure him.

“What are your plans for the day?” Cullen wanted to make certain it wasn’t anything strenuous.

“Reading and at lunch getting together with Leliana and Josie.”

“I don’t like leaving you alone when you don’t feel well,” Cullen was torn between carrying her to the healer (which he knew she would fight tooth and nail on,) or trusting that this malady would go away again.

“I’m already starting to feel better. I’m not hungry, but the nauseous feeling is going away.”

Cullen sighed knowing he couldn’t cancel all the meetings he had planned, “If you start to feel ill again, I want word sent to me immediately.”

“Yes, Commander!” Athena teased.

“Athena, I’m serious,” Cullen stated.

Athena laughed helplessly, “Cullen, I will. Now, go, before you’re late.”

Cullen sat their for a minute not wanting to tear himself away from her (yes, more so than usual.) Sighing again, he got up, and kissed her, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena paused, “I know it’s foolish to ask this, but at least try to not worry about me?”

Cullen shook his head and left without giving Athena an answer. She sighed and went back to bed to read.

**

“Are you still getting ill at breakfast?” Ruffles asked as Athena entered her office.

“Getting right to the point today are we?” Athena asked.

Josie blushed, “Forgive me. It’s just when I saw Cullen this morning he did not look happy.”

Athena shook her head, “I am and before you ask, I have been to the healers and they don’t understand it either. Where’s Leliana?”

“She had to cancel today, but promised she would be here tomorrow,” Josie answered.

Ruffles and Athena went over plans for the engagement party. Ruffles said, “It appears that the champion of Kirkwall will be coming.”

“Really?” 

“You sound surprised,” Josephine said.

“I am, I didn’t think she was one for parties. Will Anders be coming with her?” Athena asked.

“She didn’t say…” Josephine trailed off as someone knocked, “excuse me.”

“Message for the Inquisitor,” the servant said.

“Thank you,” Josephine closed the door after the servant left.

“An actual note?” Athena was starting to think this day couldn’t get any weirder.

“I’m as shocked as you are,” Ruffles handed her the note.

Athena opened it, it read: The Commander has a headache and he’s only getting worse. She closed the note and stood.

“That’s not from Cullen,” Josephine raised an eyebrow at her friend.

“It’s not, but it’s about him. I’m sorry, Josie. I have to go,” Athena hugged her.

Walking swiftly to Cullen’s office she entered to see him sitting at his desk. He looked up and whispered, “What are you doing here?”

“I received a note saying that you had a headache that wasn’t going away,” Athena’s voice was whisper soft. She walked over to him and put herself in between Cullen and his desk.

“Darius,” Cullen murmured.

Athena shrugged. She didn’t care who it was from, “Do you want me to help?”

“Not if you’re ill,” He leaned back in his chair with his brown eyes closed, Even the tiniest pinprick of light shattered through his head, glancing off of tortured memories.

“I feel fine, Cullen,” Athena sat on his desk in front of him.

“Did you have lunch?” Cullen stalled.

Athena sighed, irritated with her love’s stall tactics, “Yes. Did you?”

“A little,” he whispered. 

“Cullen…” Athena was about to lay in to him when she was interrupted.

“Do it,” Cullen murmured.

Athena didn’t question and used her healing magic to take Cullen’s pain away. When he opened his eyes she smiled at him and asked softly, “Feeling better?”

He reached out for her and pulled her on to his lap. Kissing her, he whispered, “Much.”

“Good,” Athena matched his passion with her own and the desk was quickly cleared off to make room for our lovers.

After their passions were sated, and they were dressed again, Athena asked, “Would you like me to go?”

“Why would I want you to leave?” Curly was bewildered by her question.

“Don’t you have more work to do?”

“Just a small training exercise.”

“In your office?” Athena was confused because he was showing no indication of moving.

Cullen chuckled, “No. Interested in coming with me?”

“What will you be doing?” Athena wasn’t sure if she was ready to watch him take brutal hits. Especially since he was in such pain a bit ago.

“I’m only going to watch this one.” Cullen wasn’t sure if her paleness was from this mysterious illness or the low lighting in his office. “If you’re feeling unwell…”

“I feel fine. And I will take any amount of time I get with you.” Athena smiled.

They walked hand in hand to where the new recruits were being trained. Cullen talked with the captain that was training them for a couple minutes and watched their form. He looked down at Athena and smiled, “Ready?”

Athena looked up at him, shocked, “That’s it?”  
Cullen pulled her into him and kissed her so every new recruit could see. When the kiss ended he whispered to Duchess, “Let’s go have dinner.”

“How long have you been planning to do that?” Athena asked as they walked away.

“Not long,” Curly smirked. 

Athena shook her head at him as they entered the main hall. I called over to them, “Kissing in front of the new recruits, a not so subtle way of letting them know Duchess is taken?”

Cullen just smiled as he was given his plate. Athena chuckled, “I think he made his point.”

“Now it’s going to be a weekly occurrence,” I said.

Cullen smirked as he started eating. Dorian mocked the new recruits as he came in, “I wonder who the lady was that Commander Cullen was kissing?”

Darius and Ana followed him. Darius asked, “Making a statement, Commander?”

"I'd say he's trying to keep the Inquisitor from getting any more admirers,” Nightingale sat on the other side of Cullen.

Athena looked over at Leliana, “Aren’t you still getting letters from Cullen’s admirers from the Winter Palace?”

"I am,” Leliana smiled. 

Cullen groaned, “We’ve been engaged for months now.”

“It’s not official until the engagement party,” Leliana smirked.

Curly hung his head. Athena laughed and kissed him, “Only another week. Did Josie and Bull have plans?”

“They always have plans,” Leliana griped.

Athena chuckled, “Varric, Josie told me that Hawke’s coming to the engagement party.”

“She is?” I was shocked.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one with that reaction. She hasn’t said anything to you?”

“No, she hasn’t. Maybe a letter got waylaid,” I answered.

“Maybe…” Athena trailed off as she pushed her food around on her plate.

"Duchess..." I warned.

“I’ve been to the healers, they don’t have any idea as to what’s wrong with me,” Athena sighed, frustrated.

“You’ve been ill?” Nightingale asked.

"Kind of..." Athena blushed. 

“Why don’t we go talk in Josie’s office?” Leliana suggested. Athena and Cullen both followed her and closed the door. “What’s going on?”

“I started getting ill off and on in South Reach. I thought it was just a stomach illness, but since we’ve been back in Skyhold, the instances of me feeling ill are increasing. The odd thing is that within ten to fifteen minutes it goes away,” Athena answered.

“This isn’t because of earlier, is it?” Cullen was obviously worried.

“No, if it had been I would have felt the effects immediately.” Athena assured him.

“Did you let Athena heal you?” Nightingale gently probed.

Cullen looked away, embarrassed that what he viewed as weakness was being so easily discussed. Athena answered for him, “He didn’t tell me he was in pain, but yes, he did.”

“How did you find out?” Leliana asked.

“A note was delivered to Josie,” Athena took hold of Curly’s hand.

“Written by Darius,” Cullen interjected, slightly irritated with his second.

“I don’t know, it was unsigned,” Athena shrugged. She still couldn’t care less as to who wrote the note.

“I think Athena knows her magic well enough to know when it would harm her,” Leliana supported Duchess.

Cullen caressed Athena’s cheek, “With you not feeling well earlier, I didn’t want to burden you.”

Athena kissed him, “I understand, but that kind of news shouldn’t come from anyone else.”

Cullen nodded his head in agreement. Leliana was still curious about Athena’s mysterious illness, “You said the healers have no idea as to what’s going on with you?”

“No,” Athena sighed.

“When was the last time you had your monthly?” Nightingale baldly pried.

“Andraste preserve me!” Cullen exclaimed, eliciting a soft chuckle from both ladies.

Athena thought for a couple minutes, “Right before we left for South Reach.” 

Leliana chuckled, “Athena, that was two months ago.”

“Leliana, what are you saying?” Cullen did not want to believe what he was thinking.

Athena paled and her violet eyes got wide at the realization, “No!” She looked at the anchor, “I can’t be…”

Poor Curly was ignored. Leliana was perturbed enough to ask, “How did the healers not ask that?”

Athena was broken out of her reverie with Nightingale’s question, “I think the healers are afraid to ask me questions and the surgeon and I don’t get along… Do you really think?”

“Yes, I do,” Leliana smiled at her.

“But…” Athena trailed off looking at the anchor again. Leliana shrugged.

"Athena..." Cullen couldn' hide the impatience he was feeling.

“I think... I may be...” Athena paused, “with child.”

“How?” Cullen asked, not realizing how silly that question was (he’s told me that he was just in shock… I’m sure he was.) 

Leliana laughed as she left, “I’m going to leave you two to talk.”

Athena sat down, still shocked. When she got used to the idea she placed a hand on her belly and smiled, “Cullen, you know how.”

Cullen sat beside her and blushed, “That’s not what I meant… When? Are you certain? Is this the reason you’ve been feeling poorly?”

“When would most likely be while we were in South Reach. Am I certain?… I don’t know, and possibly… It would make sense.” Athena had a half glazed look in her eyes.

“What would make you certain?” 

“Another healer’s opinion,” Athena responded.

“Then that’s where we go,” Cullen took hold of her hand as they left Ruffles’ office.

They went to one of the mage healers and explained what was going on with Athena, and when her last monthly was, the healer said, “It sounds as though you’re with child.”

“Is there any way to know for certain?” Cullen inquired.

“There is, but the surgeon here has forbidden it,” the healer answered.

“Why is she telling other healers what to do? And what does it involve?” Cullen investigated.

“She thinks she’s in charge and wants to forbid all magic from being used to heal. All the Inquisitor would have to do is lay still. No harm would come to her, or the baby… If there is one,” the healer responded.

Cullen looked at Athena, who nodded her head. The healer held her hands over Athena’s stomach and closed her eyes to see inside Athena’s body. When the healer was done she opened her eyes and smiled at Athena, “You are indeed with child and from what I can tell, you’re about two months along.”

“You’ve done this before?” Athena recognized the magics used as some of her own.

“Many times. Before joining the rebellion I was the midwife in the circle I was at,” the healer replied.

“You won’t tell anyone?” Cullen requested as Athena sat up.

“No, Commander, I won’t. You have my word,” the healer promised.

"Thank you," Athena stood and took hold of Curly’s hand. 

“You should see a midwife or a healer once a month to make sure everything is progressing the way it should,” the healer reminded her.

"I will,” Athena responded, “what is your name?”

“Caerwin, my lady,” the healer answered.

“Thank you, Caerwin,” Cullen said as they left.

Away from prying ears in Athena’s chambers, Cullen asked, “Do you believe what the healer said?”

“I do, and she didn’t do anything that I haven’t done on occasion,” Athena responded.

“On occasion? I thought you had duties as a midwife?” He questioned.

Athena chuckled softly, “It wasn’t the only thing I did and most never noticed me.”

Cullen stopped from taking off his armor and responded with a gentleness to his voice, “I don’t see how anyone could not notice you.”

Athena shrugged and placed a hand over her belly. Being with child was still having a difficult time sinking in. All the battles she had been in, the anchor, falling off of horses and cots… Duchess didn’t know what to make of it.

Cullen watched Athena kind of pace around the room. When he noticed the placement of her hand, he sighed and sat down heavily on the bed, “This is actually happening.”

Athena sat beside him, smiling, “It would appear that way.”

"You didn't think you could get pregnant did you?" Cullen gave voice to what they were both thinking.

“I wasn’t sure, with the anchor… With all that’s happened…” Athena paused, “I thought we would have more time to think about it…”

Instead of dwelling on a potentially terrifying and exciting future, Cullen kissed her, “I love you.” 

“I love you, too,” she whispered laying back on the bed.

Cullen followed her, kissing her and undressing. Once they were both naked he stopped, “Can you…”

Athena chuckled seductively, “Oh Cullen,” and pulled him down to her.

**

Athena was up with the golden rays of sunrise and walked out on to the balcony. Cullen rolled over and noticed she wasn’t in bed. He followed her out on to the balcony and wrapped his arms around her bringing an even bigger smile to her face. Athena asked, “Did you sleep well?”

“Surprisingly, yes,” Cullen answered, “you?” 

Athena turned in his embrace to kiss him in answer. There was a knock on the door and Cullen reluctantly let Athena go so he could answer it, muttering, “The war is over, why can we not get a morning without interruptions?” 

Athena chuckled softly at her love’s muttering as he let the servants in to deliver breakfast and on their way out Curly asked one of them, “Please have Knight-Captain Darius cancel my meetings for the day.”

"Cullen!" Athena was alarmed by what she heard and came in from the balcony, “Are you unwell?”

“No, I just want to spend the day with you,” He walked over to her. 

Athena wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, “I guess Varric can’t tease you for being a workaholic anymore.”

“I’m sure he’ll find something else,” Cullen pulled out a chair for her before taking his seat, “Hungry?”

Athena shook her head and made a face.

“What can I do to help?” He asked.

“Eat your breakfast. If the past few weeks are any indication, the nausea will be gone in a couple minutes,” Athena sat down in the chair across from him.

“Will you be able to eat then?” Cullen was now doubly worried.

“I doubt it. I will eat when I am able to. Don’t be surprised if this part gets worse before it gets better,” Athena tried to reassure him. It wasn’t working.

“You mean…?” Cullen started.

“The nausea will most likely get worse.” Athena finished.

“When do you think it will get better?” Curly took hold of the hand she had resting on the table. His breakfast sat, forgotten.

“It’s different for everyone. But for most that I’ve seen, around three to four months.”

“Another three to four months?!”

Athena laughed, “No, three to four months into the pregnancy. So another one or two, hopefully.”

"That's still too long," Cullen remembered his breakfast and took a bite.

“I agree, but there’s nothing that can be done about it,” Athena smiled at him.

“There is nothing to make it less so you can eat?” He asked.

“There are some herbs I could take… But they’re only to be used if you can’t keep anything down,” Athena answered.

“It doesn’t seem fair that creating another life would make you ill.”

"Cullen, what I'm going through is very mild compared to what some other women go through. There was one mage that spent her entire pregnancy ill. At the beginning she could barely keep water down. That was when the senior midwives made her an herbal drink. She had to drink every day and it smelled disgusting.” Athena wrinkled her nose.

“Is there any way to stop that from happening?” Cullen’s worry knew no bounds.

Athena laughed, “Not get pregnant. It’s different for everyone, and I am no where near that bad.”

“Don’t get that bad,” Cullen was only half joking.

Athena chuckled, “I’ll do my best not to.”

“Who would you like to tell first?” Cullen got up from the table to take the couple steps to be at Athena’s side.

She stood up as well, “I don’t know… I’d like to tell my father, but I don’t know if he’s still at Ostwick or on his way to Tevinter.”

“I’m sure Dorian knows, whom I want to tell at chess today,” Cullen responded.

Athena laughed, “He’s not going to believe you.”

“It’s a good thing you’ll be with me then,” Curly smirked.

“I am not playing chess with you two!” Athena exclaimed as they left her quarters.

“I didn’t say you had to. But at least for today, I want you near me,” Cullen said softly.

Athena kissed him before they opened the door, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” He whispered back and opened the door.

They walked in to the main hall where Ruffles and Nightingale were just about to go in to Josephine’s office. Leliana noticed them first, “Join us?”

Athena looked at Cullen and started chuckling at his scowl and followed the two ladies in. Leliana hugged Athena, “You’re very happy today.”

“We heard that the Commander cancelled all of his meetings today…” Josephine trailed off expectantly.

"I did," Cullen smiled down at Athena.

“Would this happen to have anything to do with what we talked about last night?” Nightingale asked.

“Everything,” Athena answered.

“What did I miss?!” Ruffles did not like that she missed something big.

“I don’t think you should tell her,” Leliana teased.

"Leliana!" Josephine exclaimed.

Cullen chuckled, “Leliana could I talk to you for a minute?” 

“Certainly, Commander,” Leliana answered and they moved to the other side of the room.

Cullen asked, “What do you know of a mage healer named Caerwin?”

“She was with the rebels in Redcliffe. Is she the one you talked to last night?” Leliana sought clarification.

“Yes.”

“I’ll look into her. Was I right?” Leliana pried.

Cullen smiled, “Yes.”

Leliana smiled and then laughed as she heard Ruffles gasp and exclaim, “No!”

“Yes, Josie, I’m with child.” Athena reassured her.

Ruffles squealed and almost knocked Athena over with her hug, “I’m sorry!”

Athena laughed, “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not,” Cullen responded as he stood behind Athena.

“Cullen, while we were in South Reach we fought a red lyrium giant mage. I was pregnant then, we just didn’t know it. I don’t think Josie is going to hurt me,” Athena reminded him.

Cullen sighed and closed his eyes, "Don't remind me."

Athena chuckled. Josephine’s eyes got big, “We may have to change your dress!”

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow,” Athena requested.

“Oh, Empress Celene has invited us to the ball she is having in a few weeks,” Josephine informed them.

“We’re not going to have to stop another assassination attempt are we?” Athena asked.

“No. This is just to celebrate the renovations on the Winter Palace,” Leliana said.

Curly groaned and all three ladies laughed. Leliana teased, “I wonder how many admirers the Commander will get now… Engaged and father-to-be.”

“Leliana!” Cullen warned.

“People always want what they can’t have,” Leliana teased.

“Don’t worry, Cullen, I’ll protect you,” Athena teased.

Cullen growled, “The only one you’ll be protecting is the little one growing inside you.”

Athena kissed him, “I love you.”

"I should say yes?” Ruffles asked.

“Yes,” Athena said.

“No,” Curly said at the same time.

Leliana and Josephine’s laughter was renewed when Athena said to Curly, “I think you’re trying to avoid dancing with me again.”

“Considering the last time we danced, we had to stop because you got ill…” Cullen retorted.

“I wasn’t sick, I was nauseous. There’s a difference,” Athena griped.

“What about getting there?”

“I’m not the only pregnant woman to ever be invited somewhere and have to travel to get to it,” Athena responded.

“Is there anything I can say to dissuade you from this?” Cullen took hold of both of her hands.

“No, I’ve told you before that I won’t hide behind Skyhold’s walls, that hasn’t changed. And I would love to spend the evening with the man I love instead of chasing down assassins,” Athena said gently.

Cullen sighed in defeat, “We’ll go.”

Athena kissed him, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen said softly.

“I will send a tentative yes… Depending on if a family member’s illness improves or stays the same,” Josephine took notes.

“Thank you, Josephine,” Cullen did not taking his eyes off of Athena, “We have other people to inform.”

“You’re just excited to beat my cousin at chess again by distracting him with the news,” Athena gave Leliana and Ruffles hugs.

“And if I am? He’s insufferable when he wins,” Cullen took her hand as they left.

“How often has he won?” Athena asked, chuckling.

“Twice,” Cullen griped.

Athena laughed and Cullen pulled her close to kiss her. Out in the main hall Athena spotted a plate of chocolate chip cookies and grabbed one. Curly chuckled at her, which grabbed Duchess’ attention from the cookies, “What? I’m hungry.”

“I’m sure it can be arranged that you can have more than a cookie,” Cullen offered.

Athena shook her head, “This is all I want.”

“How is it possible that you become with child and your eating habits get even worse?” Curly asked, not really expecting an answer.

“Just lucky, I guess,” Athena smiled at him.

They made their way up to Cullen’s office, with Athena eating her cookie. Sparkler was standing by the door, and saw Curly first, “You’re late, again.” Then he saw Duchess and sparkled… “Oh, I get to win today.”

Cullen smirked and laughed, “Not on your life.”

“The last time it was just the three of us, you got very distracted,” Dorian followed our lovers into Curly’s office.

Finishing off her cookie, Athena asked, “How often are you late?”

“I’m never late, your cousin is always early,” Cullen pulled out the chess board and pieces. 

“Well, Commander, I have a love life of my own to get back to,” Dorian noticed that Athena was beaming. 

“How is Darius and Ana?” Athena asked.

“Better than I deserve. I know you’ve been ill, but once you’re better I’ll be heading home,” Sparkler made the first move.

"I’m sure they aren’t happy about that,” Cullen responded.

“That is not something I want to talk about with you,” Dorian answered too quickly which had Athena laughing.

“Going well then?” Athena questioned when she recovered.

“Extremely,” Dorian smiled at her, as she sat on Cullen’s desk.

“Athena!” Cullen was alarmed at her choice of seats.

"Cullen,” Athena had an eyebrow raised and a warning in her tone.

“Get a chair,” Cullen ordered, making his move.

“Hmm, move a heavy chair, or sit on the extremely sturdy desk… I’m thinking the chair’s a bad idea, in my condition…” Athena turned to move papers so she could sit on more of his desk.

“I don’t want you to fall. Dorian, your move,” Cullen got up to get a chair for her.

“I won’t, my balance hasn’t been affected… yet.”

“Still…” Cullen maneuvered the chair to be beside him, “Sit beside me, please?”

Athena slid off the desk, and gently teased, “Only because you said please.”

Sparkler still hadn’t made his move because he was watching them go back and forth finally exploded, “What are you two on about?! Athena isn’t that sick!” He had a sudden, horrible thought, “Are you?”

Athena laughed, "No," then she looked beside her at Cullen who took hold of her hand, “Well…”

Dorian made his move, “If he’s somehow made you sick…I’ll…” 

Cullen made his move and then raised an eyebrow at Dorian, “You’ll…”

Sparkler sighed, making his move, “I don’t know… But I’ll think of something.”

Athena teased, “Cullen, you are to blame for my… affliction.”

“And I am very glad for it,” Curly kissed her. 

“Oh, for the love of the Maker, get a room you two,” Sparkler griped.

“We have one and you’re in it. Do you forfeit, Dorian?” Cullen made his move.

“Absolutely not. Now, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Dorian commanded, making his move.

“Athena’s with child,” Cullen said it so quietly that Dorian barely heard him.

“Did you just say that Athena is with child?” Dorian did not believe what he heard.

“He did,” Athena said quietly, staring in to Cullen’s eyes.

Sparkler was struck silent for several minutes. Cullen finally made his move and said, “Check mate.”

“How?” Dorian finally questioned.

“You still leave your king wide open,” Cullen answered.

“Not the game! How is Athena with child?” Sparkler was flabbergasted.

“Those are details you are not getting!” Athena blushed.

"Not that! How far along are you? Apparently the anchor hasn’t affected anything else except your hand?” Dorian was full of questions.

“About two months and it would appear that way,” Athena tried to not to show her worry. The anchor was a magic she didn’t know anything about. Would it harm the beginning life inside her?

“This is fantastic news! Have you written Arthur yet?” 

“I’m not sure if he is still at Ostwick or back in Tevinter,” Athena said.

"I can find out for you," Dorian offered.

“Thank you,” Athena smiled at her cousin.

“Should I tell Darius?” Sparkler asked.

“Can I stop you?” Cullen rejoined.

“No,” Dorian winked and bowed out.

Cullen turned in his chair to face Athena, “Are you sure you don’t want to play a game?"

Athena shook her head, “I was thinking of something else...” She kissed him then, making certain he knew what the something else was.

**

Cullen caressed a sleeping Athena’s shoulder when there was a knock on his office door. He gently moved out from under her and got dressed. When he opened the door he saw that it was Cassandra, “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see the Inquisitor. Leliana said there was something I should talk to her about,” Seeker answered.

“She’s sleeping right now. I thought you had left for Val Royeaux?” Cullen asked.

“I did. We… Came back,” Cassandra blushed.

Cullen chuckled, “How many are resistant to the changes you want to do?”

“All of them,” Seeker growled.

“Just remember, Cassandra, you are the next Divine. They have to listen to you,” Cullen smiled.

“You seem very pleased with yourself considering Athena hasn’t been feeling well lately,” She changed the subject.

“There’s a very good reason for that,” Curly’s smile got bigger.

"And do I get to know this reason?" Seeker asked.

“Once she’s awake,” he chuckled.

“Cullen?" A very sleepy voice called down.

“Down here,” Cullen called up to her, and then he smirked, “Divine Victoria wanted to talk to you.” 

“That is not my name, not yet,” Seeker complained.

They could hear Athena laughing as she got ready to come down. Once she had climbed down the ladder, (with Curly watching her every move,) she said, “Hello Cassandra.”

“Hello. Leliana said that I should speak to you, but refused to tell me why and I have to go back to Val Royeaux in the morning.” Seeker stopped to take a breath.

“How are you and Rylen?” Athena asked.

“He’s…. Amazing. I probably would have killed most of the clerics by now had he not been there,” Cassandra said dreamily. Curly had to turn away so he wouldn’t laugh.

“I’m glad to hear it, Cassandra. As for my…our news,” Athena stopped to look at Cullen, “I’m with child.”

Seeker’s mouth dropped open, “No! How?”

“Again with the how,” Athena sighed.

"I mean how did you find out? How far along are you?" Cassandra blushed (I really wish I had been there to see it.)

“We were trying to figure out what was wrong with me and I’m about two months,” Athena answered.

“With the anchor…” Cassandra trailed off.

Athena shrugged, “I don’t know.” 

“Why don't we go to the main hall for dinner?” Cullen walked both ladies out.

"I'll get Rylen and meet you there," Seeker went the opposite direction. Cullen smiled at Athena and kissed her before they made their way to the main hall.

“Are you two okay?” I asked as they sat down.

“Fine, why?” Cullen asked.

“Because you cancelled your meetings today,” I responded.

“Sometimes I don’t feel like working,” Curly smiled.

“Duchess, what did you do to him?” I was shocked by what I was hearing.

“He wanted to spend the day with me,” Athena smiled at Curly.

“He always wants to spend time with you, that’s never stopped him from working before,” I griped.

“Today is special,” Curly said softly.

“Why?”

“We found out last night that I’m with child,” Athena answered.

I laughed, "Finally, something normal has happened to you."

They both chuckled and Athena wondered, “You’re the first one we’ve told to not ask how.”

“I know how, Duchess. How far a long are you?” I chuckled.

“About two months,” Athena responded.

“So, when we were in South Reach… Fighting Brenna…” I trailed off.

“Don’t remind me,” Curly groaned as he closed his eyes.

Athena chuckled at him. Ruffles, Bull, and Leliana joined us. Ruffles did not look pleased, Athena noticed, “Josie?”

“Long day,” Josephine sighed. Athena looked at Nightingale who shook her head just as confused. 

“Why don’t we go talk?” Duchess suggested.

“Just us?” Ruffles asked.

“Yes…?” Leliana questioned, finding it odd that Josephine was willing to leave Tiny’s side.

Ruffles got up and went to her office without another word. Athena and Nightingale looked at each other, quite surprised at Josephine’s abruptness and followed. Once they were in her office they watched Josephine pace, for several minutes. Athena finally decided to sit, and Leliana joined her, “Josie, talk to us.”

“My mother has told me that I have to end my relationship with Bull,” Ruffles was near tears.

“Whatever for?” Athena asked. 

"Because he’s Qunari… Tal Vashoth," Josephine finally sat.

“Have you told her how much he means to you?” Leliana asked.

“No.”

“You should probably try that,” Nightingale teased.

“Why not invite them to Skyhold? That way they can see how happy you are with him,” Athena suggested.

“They’ll want me to return home.” Josephine got up to pace again.

“Is that what you want?” Athena asked.

“Eventually... perhaps,” She answered.

“Josie, no one is going to make you go anywhere you’re not ready to go,” Leliana said.

"Are you certain?” Josephine asked.

“Absolutely. Do you really think the Inquisition could afford to lose its Ambassador? And I can’t afford to lose one of my best friends,” Athena reassured her friend.

“That and Cullen would have a full guard follow you everywhere if you had to play Ambassador,” Leliana teased.

“Don’t give him any ideas,” Athena smiled.

“Thank you!” Ruffles hugged them. 

When the ladies joined us again, Ruffles was much happier. Bull noticed, “I’ve been trying since lunch to get her to smile without success. She spends five minutes with you two and she’s back to herself.”

“Don’t question it, Bull. It’s that way for Athena too,” Cullen sighed.

The trio looked at each other and smiled mischievously. Athena said, “We’re friends, that’s what we do.”

The main hall's doors were thrown open and we could hear Seeker saying, “It’s already done, Revered Mother, and I’m not undoing it. I love him!”

“Lady Cassandra, this isn’t done! There hasn’t been a married Divine since…” Mother Giselle was cut off.

“Since ever, I know! But Andraste was married, and I don’t remember anything in the Chant of Light saying the Divine couldn’t be married,” Cassandra was irritated as she came in to the hall with Rylen by her side.

“Married?” Athena whispered. We all shook our heads, just as lost.

“I can see there is no changing your mind on this,” Mother Giselle said and left. 

“I’M ALREADY MARRIED!” Seeker shouted.

“And now we have the reason she’s back from Val Royeaux,” Leliana sighed. 

“She didn’t tell you?” Ruffles asked.

“No,” Nightingale responded.

“Did you know?” Athena questioned.

“There were… Rumors,” Leliana answered quietly.

“There’s never a dull moment here,” I chuckled. Before anyone had a chance to go talk to Seeker, her husband pulled her out of the hall so she could cool off. 

Leliana and Athena watched them leave and then looked at each other, “Don’t you dare, Athena. It’s not your job anymore.”

“Why would calming down Cassandra be your job?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“She can be quite… Passionate…and, at times, I would be the only one that could get through to her,” Athena said.

I laughed at Athena’s explanation, “Sure, if passionate means aggressive.”

“You didn’t help,” Athena retorted.

“When it was so easy to rile her? Why would I?” I teased.

Athena sighed, shaking her head, “Oh, Varric.”

“Up for a game of Wicked Grace?” I smiled at her.

“Not tonight,” She hid a yawn.

“Are you all right?” Cullen was instantly worried.

“Yes, just tired,” Athena chuckled softly.

“Then I think it’s time we say good night,” Cullen stood and reached down for her hand. Which she gladly took, and they disappeared in to her quarters.

“The morning sickness better end soon, or he’s going to drive her crazy,” Leliana said quietly after the door shut… No one could disagree with her.

As Athena and Cullen were getting undressed, she had to ask, "Can you explain to me how sitting on your desk is not okay, but climbing down a ladder is?"

Cullen chuckled, "I wondered when that was going to come up. Unlike when Dorian and I were playing chess, you had my full attention.”

“Cullen?”

“Yes?”   
She waited until he sat beside her on the bed, “Except for being tired and the morning sickness, I’m still me. Please, save the over protective stuff until I can’t see my feet?”

“I’ll try,” Cullen smiled at her.

“Thank you,” Athena kissed him, “Did Cassandra tell you that she was already married?”

“No, she didn’t. She said that Leliana sent her,” Cullen put his arm around her.

“I wonder why,” Athena yawned.

Cullen chuckled, “Leliana most likely wanted us to share our news.”

“True,” she sighed, “We should have more days like today.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Curly said as they laid down and drifted off to sleep.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Small content warning: this chapter has a miscarriage in it and it is something the characters will deal with through out the rest of the story.

Our lovers spent the next few days blissfully happy, and almost inseparable except for the duties their positions required. Ruffles also arranged to have fresh chocolate chip cookies everywhere Athena would usually haunt. Which came up at the lunch they had together the day of the engagement party, “Josie, they’re everywhere!”

Ruffles chuckled, “Every time you are in the main hall you grab one. I’m just making it easier for you. Are you excited for tonight?”

“I am,” Athena answered.

“And the Commander?” Josephine asked.

"Excited is not the word I would use…” Athena trailed off.

“Grumpy is the word I would use,” Nightingale chimed in, joining them.

“Stop teasing him and he would be less grumpy,” Athena said.

“You get away with it,” Leliana griped, sitting down.

“He loves me, and I’m not as merciless as you are,” Athena teased.

“That and he is far too worried over you being ill,” Nightingale grinned.

“The morning illness is not getting better?” Ruffles asked with sympathy.

“No, it’s been getting worse,” Athena answered.

“It didn’t help that you got ill on the surgeon,” Leliana teased, smiling.

"I told her that I needed to leave!” 

“You got ill on the surgeon?” Ruffles was not believing what she was hearing.

“Not intentionally, but she insisted on reading me the riot act for going to a mage instead of her. I told her that I was battling a stomach illness and needed to leave, she wouldn’t let me.”

“She wouldn’t let you leave?!” Josephine gasped, scandalized.

“Some people are saying that she pushed you. Is that true?” Nightingale probed.

“She grabbed my arm to prevent me from leaving, but she didn’t push me,” Duchess wondered where Curly was.

“How dare she touch you!” Ruffles was getting quite irritated on her friend’s behalf.

“Does the Commander know that she grabbed you?” Leliana asked. (This luncheon was quickly becoming an interrogation.)

“I don’t know. We haven’t had much of a chance to talk about it. He came to bed late last night, told me that I was not to go near the surgeon unless someone was with me. Then he fell sleep. This was the first we were to see each other today,” Athena looked at the door expectantly and saw her fiance, “You’re losing your touch.”

“Very funny, Athena. No, I did not know that the surgeon grabbed you,” As Nightingale so aptly put it before, Curly was grumpy.

“I warned you, he’s grumpy,” Leliana earned her a scowl from Cullen.

“What happened after…?” Josephine asked Athena, still quite irritated with the surgeon, but desperately wanted to know the whole story.

“The Chargers were on their way to dinner and Bull seemed to witness everything. He said things that I’m not repeating, and we went to dinner.”

“As well he should,” Cullen was pacing so he didn’t lash out at those who didn’t deserve it.

“Commander, how did you find out about this if Athena didn’t tell you?” Ruffles questioned, incredibly curious.

“Bull needed a sparring partner,” Cullen was slowly calming down.

“Usually Bull doesn’t talk when he’s sparring…” Athena wondered.

“He told me before we started sparring,” he was finally calm enough to sit beside Athena.

“That explains why you came to bed so late,” Athena answered her unasked question.

“But why wouldn’t he tell you everything?” Josephine asked.

“Because he needed a sparring partner, not someone blinded by anger,” Athena knew well how Tiny worked.

“I’ve done the same… And how do you know what Bull does when sparring?” Cullen asked her.

“Mostly from watching him and Cassandra.”

“Mostly?” Nightingale raised an eyebrow at Duchess.

“We found out early on that I don’t make a very good sparring partner,” Athena chuckled.

“He… WHAT?!” Curly exploded and the ladies jumped, surprised by his loudness.

Athena laughed, “It was at my insistence, Cullen. It looked like fun. Every time I tried to talk to you, you were either going to or coming from a sparring exercise.”

Leliana laughed. Ruffles couldn’t believe her ears, “You wanted to learn to spar so you could spend time with Cullen?!”

Athena’s blush was all that was needed to answer Ruffles’ question. Cullen looked at his love, astounded, “Did Bull know this?”

“I think so… It wasn’t something we really discussed,” Athena responded softly.

Cullen shook his head and caressed her cheek, “Had I known, I would have taught you myself.”

Athena chuckled huskily, “And that’s gone over so well with chess.”

Ruffles smiled at our lovers, “Leliana, why don’t we go talk to this surgeon and see if Bull would like some more time with her?”

“That is an excellent idea, Josie,” Leliana and Josephine left as our lovers got lost in each other’s eyes.

Cullen looked away from her before they made inappropriate use of Ruffles’ office. Clearing his throat, he said, “The surgeon told me this morning that she was yelling at you because you were healing a dying man.”

“Is that what she said?” Athena raised an eyebrow, “I’m assuming she means the gentleman I stopped to talk to on my way to Caerwin’s… I heard her say that there was nothing she could do for him. I asked him if he would like me to get a mage healer for him. He said yes, I told Caerwin and we walked back to the surgeon together. That is when she laid in to me about going to a mage healer.”

Cullen closed his eyes, “I am so sorry.” When he opened them again they flashed with with anger, “I will be talking to her.”

“I understand that she doesn’t like me, but to outright lie? What purpose would it serve?” Athena wasn’t really expecting an answer.

“I was reprimanding her for keeping you last night, and she thought it would be wise to pass some of the blame to you,” Cullen got up to pace.

“And for a brief second, you thought I was trying to save him like I did Selene and the baby,” Athena guessed. 

Cullen nodded as he sat back down beside her, “I know it was foolish but the memory of you laying there unconscious after saving Selene came to me, unbidden, and I…”

“Cullen, it’s all right. I’ve had to hide myself from the soldiers when you train them because they like to tell me how many times you were knocked down, and I have to fight the urge to not run on to the training field to make certain you aren’t injured,” Duchess smiled at him.

“I’m going to kill them,” he mumbled. 

Athena chuckled softly and took his hand to place it on her belly, “I would never do anything that I thought would harm our child. Since we found out, I have not been to my tower. Even though there are several times a day that I want to run to it, I find other things to do. We have a few hours before the party… Do you have some free time?”

“I should go talk to the surgeon… again,” Cullen had a hard edge to his voice thinking of all the things he wanted to say to her.

“She can wait until tomorrow,” Athena stood. 

Curly still had his hand on her belly. As he stood, he slid his hands to Athena’s back and whispered, “You are everything to me.”

“I love you, Cullen. Let’s give Josie her office back,” Athena kissed him. 

On the way to Duchess’ chambers, Curly asked, “I thought you felt safe at the tower?”

“I do, but it is also being worked on non-stop. With how often I’ve been getting ill, it’s just not a wise thing to do right now.” 

“Thank you,” he pulled her to him and kissed her. The kiss turned in to more and they wiled away their time making love.

**

Down in the main hall, I greeted Hawke, “I thought you would be with Blondie.”

“I am,” Hawke responded. I noticed that her red hair had gotten longer and her green eyes looked like she hadn’t slept in weeks.

“You brought him here? With templars, grey wardens, and chantry people surrounding him?!” I asked, incredulous.

“He wanted to meet the Inquisitor,” Hawke answered, her voice deep and smooth.

“Why does he want to meet her? And why do you look like you haven’t slept in weeks?” I interrogated because things tend to explode when Blondie is involved.

“When do I ever get enough sleep? You don’t usually question my decisions, Varric, why do you care so much?” Hawke asked.

“Because the Inquisitor is a good person, and I will lay down my life in a heartbeat to protect her. And Blondie has an affinity for blowing shit up. I’d rather not be witness to Skyhold being blown to bits,” I answered, carefully watching Duchess’ door, knowing that she would be coming down at any minute.

“Your devotion to her is admirable. You haven’t seen Anders in years, he’s changed,” Hawke argued.

“Vengeance isn’t part of him anymore?”

“You know they can’t separate,” Hawke sounded as though she was getting irritated with me.

“Then he’s still a danger isn’t he?” I paused, “Here’s just an example of the kind of lady the Inquisitor is... After I introduced you to Duchess, she had to defend me against Seeker. After I had some time to cool off, we talked. She told me that she was glad that I didn’t give you up when I was questioned by Seeker. It showed her that I was loyal to my friends, and that because of her friendship with me, of all people, she could hope for something of a normal life once the war was over. She has a real shot at that, Hawke, don’t blow it for her.”

"Varric, Anders isn’t going to hurt her,” Hawke tried to reassure me. It didn’t work.

“He may not kill her, but he’s already exploded once… It can and will happen again,” I walked away from her.

"I don't think I've ever seen you that passionate, Varric,” Sparkler saw the entire thing.

“Yeah, well, I don’t need to see Skyhold explode like the chantry in Kirkwall did,” I complained.

“Maybe we should meet with him first?” Dorian offered.

“That’s not a bad idea. Only thing is, no templars and it has to be done right after the party, because I’m sure Hawke will want to introduce them first thing tomorrow,” I answered.

“Do you think Athena would refuse?” Sparkler asked.

“Do you think Curly would let her out of his sight if he knew Anders was here?” I asked in response. Sparkler shook his head, and we saw Curly and Duchess walk in to the main hall, promptly ending our discussion.

Ruffles had our lovers announced as newly engaged, gave the date of the wedding, and dismissed us to eat. Josephine was trying to convince Curly to give a speech, “No, Josephine. I’ve already done my speaking and it was to Athena.”

Athena couldn’t resist teasing him, “So you’re going to stand silent at our wedding?”

“Is that an option?” He teased back.

“They’re going to be the death of me,” Ruffles sighed in exasperation. 

“If Curly’s too shy to speak. I think I can throw a few words together, Ruffles,” I had already figured out what I wanted to say.

“That would be excellent, Varric, thank you,” Josephine smiled.

“If Varric wouldn’t have volunteered, I would have,” Sparkler winked at her.

“This is going from bad to worse,” Cullen complained with a good natured grin.

Athena chuckled, “You could have said yes.”

“You have far more experience at speaking in front of crowds than I do,” Cullen quipped.

“And I stumbled through each and every one of them with a knot in my stomach the size of a fist. I’ve heard you give plenty of speeches to the soldiers.”

“That’s different,” Curly fought a blush.

“Ah, the Commander is already blushing, a fine start to the evening,” Darius sat beside Dorian.

“I should relieve you of your duties,” Cullen groused.

“I’d just join the Inquisitor’s personal guard,” Darius teased.

“If there was one, it would still be under my command.”

“Andraste preserve me, I think I have enough bodyguards,” Athena groaned.

Curly kissed her then and said softly, “When it comes to your protection, never.”

Athena smiled, “I love you, but the war is over. I don’t need any more bodyguards.”

Sparkler and I looked at each other. I was wishing she had a few more. 

After dinner I got up and gave my speech, toasting our lovers and I got both of them to blush, repeatedly. I took the repeated blushing as a successful speech. Once my speech ended, our lovers had to endure the line of congratulations, Hawke was part of that line, before she reached them I warned her, “Let them have their night.”

“Varric, has it really been that long?” Hawke asked, getting quite irritated with me.

“The Hawke I knew protected innocents and wouldn’t willingly expose them to danger,” I replied.

“Varric, I love Anders. You know that, why are you fighting me on this?” Hawke’s exasperation spoke volumes.

“Because they’re my friends. Why is it so hard for you to believe I wouldn’t do everything in my power to protect my friends from harm? Before you even ask Duchess to meet him, Sparkler and I need to talk to him first.”

“Fine,” Hawke sighed, frustrated, “who’s Sparkler?”

“The Inquisitor’s cousin.” I answered.

Hawke raised an eyebrow at me and congratulated the officially engaged couple, and said to Curly, “You seem happy.”

“I am,” Cullen smiled as he gently squeezed Athena’s hand and released it so she could accept more congratulations, “and you?”

“I have my moments,” Hawke smiled. 

Ruffles had the music start so people could start dancing. Cullen asked Athena quietly, “How are you feeling?” 

She smiled, “I think I can handle a dance or two.”

Out on the dance floor Athena had to ask, “Is Hawke usually that cryptic?”

“You would know that better than I. You’ve spent more time with her,” Cullen answered.

“Being trapped in the Fade with someone doesn’t really lend itself to asking if someone is happy…” Athena trailed off.

Cullen shook his head at her, “Neither does fighting a red lyrium addicted knight-commander.”

“Varric doesn’t seem too happy that she’s here,” Athena watched me, I raised my glass to her and she blushed.

“You can ask him about it later,” Cullen ordered, “tonight is supposed to be about us.”

“Why, Commander, it sounds as though you’re enjoying yourself,” She teased.

The song ended, and they stopped dancing. Curly kissed her, “And if I am? I have the most amazing and beautiful woman in all of Thedas marrying me.”

Athena blushed as they took another turn dancing, “I think you just broke the hearts of all your admirers from the Winter Palace.”

“Good. I would love to know who invited them,” Cullen said.

“I’m thinking it was Leliana’s idea,” Athena started to feel as though she was off balance and queasy.

"You are probably right,” Cullen noticed that Athena had paled considerably and questioned, “Would you like to sit down?”

She sighed in frustration as they stopped dancing, “No, but I’m not being given a choice.” 

They walked over to their chairs and sat. Cullen asked, “What can I do to help?”

Athena laid her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes as another wave of nausea hit her, “Nothing at the moment.”

“Athena, we don’t have to stay down here,” Cullen softly argued.

“Yes… We do,” Athena whispered, the nausea was intensifying.

"Why?" He was ready to carry her if she would say the word.

“Because I like the dress I’m wearing, and right now any movement would not be pleasant,” Athena responded. 

Cullen sat as still as possible except for moving his free hand to hold hers. After several minutes of quietly sitting together, Athena sighed shakily, and whispered, “We can go upstairs now.”

“Are you able to walk?” Cullen stood, at the ready to assist her.

“I think so,” Athena took hold of his hand to stand. He immediately pulled her close and put an arm around her waist.  
They walked to and past the first door to Athena’s quarters. When they stopped so Curly could close the door, Athena wilted. Cullen said, “I’m carrying you the rest of the way.”

Athena didn’t argue when he picked her up and carried her up the stairs to lay her on the bed.

“You should go back to the party,” Athena said weakly.

“Athena, I am not going to leave you by yourself when you are too ill to walk,” Cullen got her a glass of water.

“But you were having fun,” Athena sat up to take the water from him.

“I was having fun because I was with you,” Cullen sat down beside her after he got out of his formal attire.

“I’m not going to be much fun to be around for the rest of the night,” She put her glass down on her night stand and laid down on her side, almost curling into a ball.

Cullen just shook his head, “I don’t care. Should I send for a healer?”

“I don’t think that’s needed... Remember how I told you that it was going to get worse before it got better?” Athena was starting to feel a little better now that she was laying down.

“Yes.”

“It’s worse,” Athena half smiled at him.

Cullen sighed, and put his arm around her after he laid down, “Did you have a good time tonight?”

"I did. I wish we could have danced longer,” Athena snuggled close to him.

“Let’s save the dancing until you’re feeling better.”

“If I have to,” Athena sighed and started to fall asleep.

“Athena, you should probably get undressed,” Cullen softly reminded her.

She whined, “I don’t want to move.”

“You said that you liked the dress you’re wearing,” Cullen reminded her.

Athena sighed, “I know.” She got up, took the dress off and laid back down, as she fell asleep, she whispered, “I love you.”

Curly whispered back, “I love you, too.”

Unfortunately, neither one got very much sleep that night. Athena was sick and in pain most of the night with the anchor flaring up at odd times and Cullen was up with her. Halfway through he asked, “Why don’t I take you to a healer?”

“There’s nothing they can do, Cullen,” She responded softly as she laid back down beside him.

“Is there anything I can do to help you?”

“Hold me?” Athena begged with desperation and fear lacing her voice. In answer Cullen pulled her tight against him and didn’t let go unless she needed him to. 

Around sunrise she was finally able to sleep and Curly’s day was about to begin. He first started off breakfast with Sparkler and I. Dorian saw him first, “Commander?”

“Morning,” Curly said to us as he sat down.

“Did you get any sleep?” I asked. The dark circles under his eyes said no.

“A little,” Cullen answered.

"How is she?" Sparkler asked. We were worried as we were still here when they left the party last night.

“Sleeping,” Cullen responded.

“You look like you should be sleeping with her,” I quietly remarked.

“I have a few things I can’t put off any longer,” Cullen’s worry for Athena made his answers short.

“Like talking to the surgeon?” Dorian probed.

“Bull told you?” Curly asked.

“He was quite vocal over how the surgeon treated the Inquisitor. He also found it quite amusing that the surgeon ended up needing to bathe. When he went with Leliana and the Ambassador yesterday… Well, he’s still too angry to tell me,” Sparkler answered.

"I guess I should talk to Bull first,” Cullen sighed wearily.

“I’d be willing to lay odds that he doesn’t want to tell you so you don’t go and kill the only nonmage healer Skyhold has,” I quipped.

"I wouldn’t be willing to take that bet,” Dorian said.

Almost as if Andraste had a hand in it, Bull walked in to Josephine’s office. He didn’t even wave at us. Curly finished eating, “At least I don’t have to find him.”

"Do you want one of us to check on Athena?” I offered.

“I’ll ask Josephine, but thank you,” Cullen answered as he went in to Ruffles’ office.

“I don't think I've ever seen you so angry,” Bull was trying to calm down a very ruffled Ruffles.

“Athena’s a friend and what she called her…” Ruffles paused on seeing Curly, “Commander!”

“Am I interrupting?” Cullen asked.

“No, please, come in.” Josephine said, “How is Athena?”

"I’m hoping she’ll be fine when she wakes up,” Cullen responded.

“When you left, she did not look well. I’m guessing it only got worse?” Ruffles motioned for them to sit.

Cullen nodded, “Would you mind checking in on her this morning? I have some things I need to do.” 

“It would be my pleasure,” Josephine smiled.

“Would one of them be talking to the surgeon?” Bull questioned.

“Yes, it would, and that’s why I’m here. What did she say about Athena when you met with her yesterday?”

“Cullen, you don’t want to know,” Ruffles answered before Tiny could.

"Where would you like me to start?” Bull asked.

“Bull!” 

“Kadan, he needs to know,” 

“At the beginning,” Cullen answered.

“The surgeon told the boss that she didn’t belong in a place of healing. When Athena tried to excuse herself, the surgeon lit in to her about going to mage healers. That’s when the boss became ill. When we talked to the surgeon yesterday, she came very close to threatening her.” As Bull explained Cullen’s scowl turned darker and angrier.

“Athena has said in the past that she is not willing to dismiss the surgeon until a suitable replacement can be found,” Josephine quietly reminded them.

“Why?” Bull came close to exploding.

“Because she knows there are people that would rather die than go to see a mage healer,” Cullen said quietly.

“And to cost one person their life because she was insulted…” Ruffles paused, “She would rather suffer the insults and threats.”

“You’ve been looking for a replacement?” Cullen got up to leave.

“For months,” Josephine answered.

“As soon as one is found, the surgeon goes,” Cullen ordered and left to go talk to the surgeon.

As Curly approached the surgeon, she paled. He did little to hide the menace he was feeling towards her, “You lied to me. What’s worse, the woman that saved your life you treat abominably. If I hear of anything other than you begging for forgiveness the next time she approaches you, I will lock you in the dungeon myself. Once a suitable replacement is found, your services will no longer be required here.”

“You don’t have the authority,” the surgeon sneered, trying to hide her fear. (Curly can be quite imposing when he wants to be.)

“I do have that authority. If I feel that the Inquisitor is threatened in any way, shape, or form, I have the authority to act on it. Your time here at Skyhold is limited. It is up to you on whether you want to continue to treat people or spend it in the dungeon,” Cullen finished and went to the sparring ring to get out some of the aggression he was feeling.

Leliana met him there as he was finishing up, “You had the surgeon terrified.”

“Good,” Cullen said as they walked to his office.

“How is the Inquisitor?” Leliana asked.

“When I left she was sleeping,” Cullen sighed wearily, the memories of the sleepless night taking hold of him.

“You asked Josie to check on her,” Leliana stated.

“I’m sure you’ll find your way to see her too,” Cullen closed the door behind them.

“Of course, we’re friends,” Leliana smiled and handed Cullen a report, “I received a report on Caerwin. She is everything she claims to be, and it seems as though she’s truly here to help.”

“Good to know, but that’s not why you’re here,” Cullen sat behind his desk. 

“Timson reports that Rosalie wants to join him in spying.”

Curly erupted out of his seat, “I knew she could be stubborn but this goes beyond… She has never shown any interest in this.”

“I told him about the training I put some of my agents through to hopefully dissuade them,” Leliana chuckled.

“Thank you.” Cullen sat again, looking worn now that his anger and aggression had drained out of him.

“I could ask around to see if there is anything to ease what Athena is going through,” Nightingale suggested.

“I’m not sure how she would react to that. She told me there wasn’t really anything that could be done.”

“I’ll still look in to it. Make sure you get some rest, too,” Leliana left. 

Cullen closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the chair, fighting the headache that had started while he was yelling at the surgeon. Unbidden, the memories of the torture he suffered at the Fereldan Circle hit him with full force and because of the memories, his body started to sing the painful song for lyrium. He fought for hours. He didn’t hear Athena enter, “Cullen?”

Still caught in the tangle of memories and pain, he whispered, “I don’t want you to see me like this.”

Athena sat on his desk and said gently, “Cullen, open your eyes.” For a while they just sat there, as Athena was about to repeat herself, he opened his brown eyes. She gasped seeing how much pain was in them, “Oh, Cullen…”

He closed his eyes again. Athena took hold of his hands, “Please look at me.”

“Why?” He rasped out.

“Because I refuse to lose you… Even to your memories,” Athena whispered.

Cullen did as she asked and opened his eyes, they just looked at each other for a while. Cullen, trying to pull himself back to the present and Athena being the anchor to bring him back. Once the fog of the past lifted from him, he hoarsely said, “You should still be sleeping.”

“Cullen, I slept all day. The sun set an hour ago.”

He closed his eyes again. Athena squeezed his hands, bringing a half smile to his lips, “I should have stayed with you this morning.” 

“That would've been nice," Athena quietly remarked.

“I'm supposed to be taking care of you…” Cullen opened his eyes again.

“You did that last night, it’s my turn now,” Athena smiled at him.

“Not if it’s going to make you ill,” he warned. Cullen wasn’t sure if the pain he was in was affecting his vision, but Athena still looked too pale.

Athena shook her head in disbelief, “Are you ready?”

“Yes,” he sighed. Through Athena’s magic she was able to take away at least the lyrium withdrawal pain. 

“When did the pain start?” Athena sat back more on the desk so she could stretch.

“I’m not certain… It was just a head ache and then the memories came flooding back…” Cullen trailed off.

“And you got locked in them,” Athena quietly finished for him.

He nodded, and then realized where she was sitting, “Get off of my desk.”

“No!”

“Then I’ll make you get off,” Cullen released her hands to put his hands around her waist and pulled her on to his lap. 

“For all that we’ve done on your desk, I would think my sitting on it would be the least of your worries,” Athena laughed.

He kissed her, “I wanted an excuse to bring you closer.”

“You never need an excuse for that,” Athena said huskily.

Cullen grew serious, thinking back on last night, “Are you truly feeling better?”

“I still feel weak and off balance, but the nausea is gone for now,” She reached up to play with his hair.

“Your mark was flaring at odd times…”

“I know… I wish there was someone I could talk to about it.”

Sparkler and I interrupted her by entering his office without knocking, “Commander, I’m sorry I missed our chess match today…” Dorian trailed off as he saw how pale Athena still looked.

Cullen laid his forehead on Athena’s shoulder and sighed, “It’s fine, Dorian.”

"We have some news,” I said.

“It doesn’t sound as though it’s good news,” Athena attempted to get off Curly’s lap, with a quick shake of his head, he let her know that wasn’t going to happen.

“It’s… Not,” I struggled with how to broach the subject of Blondie being in Skyhold.

“Would it have anything to do with Anders being at Skyhold?” Athena asked.

“How did you find out?” Sparkler was just as surprised as I was.

“I had dinner with Leliana and Josie.” 

“Hawke brought him here?” Cullen was quick to show his irritation.

“She said he wanted to meet Athena,” I winced at the anger in his tone.

Cullen closed his eyes and groaned. This was not something they needed right now.

Athena asked, “Varric, is this something that can wait until the morning?”

“Hawke and Anders are leaving in the morning. Sparkler and I tried to convince them to just go without meeting you. They somehow have it in their heads that you can pardon Anders’ crimes.”

“Which Anders is he?” Cullen asked.

“When we had lunch with them, he was just healer Anders. You know as well as I do that that’s as changeable as the wind,” I responded.

"Where did they get the idea that I could pardon him?” Athena wondered.

“They won’t tell me.”

“Hawke won’t tell you?!” Athena exclaimed, incredulous.

“She thinks Anders is safe to be around, I disagree. It’s a point of contention between us.”

“From all that Varric has told me of him, and meeting Anders, I’m inclined to agree with Varric,” Sparkler defended me.

“I don’t understand why they think I could pardon his crimes. They were done long before I became Inquisitor. I also don’t understand why they think I would even if I could,” Athena was hopelessly confused.

“Oh dear girl, it’s because you’re a mage. Some think that no matter how dastardly a mage deed is, it should be forgiven by another mage,” Dorian said in typical Sparkler fashion.

“That’s not right. And with what you and Leliana have told me, all I’m hearing are demands and conflicting stories from someone that’s already sacrificed innocent people.”

“But you showed Blackwall mercy,” I reminded her.

“He had sacrificed himself for the Inquisition and was willing to be put to death for what he'd done… If I were able to do this, if I wanted to do this, what is he offering?” Duchess asked.

“Great question, Duchess. And one we could not get an answer to,” I said.

“I’m sorry, Varric, but I don’t see what good can come of me meeting him,” Athena gently refused.

All three of us gave huge sighs of relief, “You don’t have to apologize to me. I will be happy to pass on the message.” 

“Before we go, I’m glad you’re feeling better, Athena,” Sparkler smiled at her.

“Let’s hope it stays that way,” Cullen said, in a prayer-like fashion. 

“Any more news can wait until morning?” Athena requested.

“We’ll do our best,” I answered.

“Have a good night, gentlemen, “ Athena wished us as we closed the door.

“I wonder how long Leliana’s known,” Cullen said quietly.

“Probably since they arrived,” Athena played with his hair again, “she’s also having them watched.”

"I'm surprised you don't want to meet him," Cullen gave voice to his concern.

“If I wanted to, you would have at least half the guard of Skyhold surrounding me. Varric would have Bianca drawn, and Dorian would be setting things on fire. Leliana also told me of how he had, at one time, said he wanted to kill every Templar he came in contact with… In the best interest of everyone I don’t think meeting him is a good idea,” Athena explained.

“Thank the Maker,” Cullen sighed.

“When was the last time you had something to eat?” Athena asked.

“Breakfast,” he answered.

“Then why don’t we go to my chambers?” She asked.

“You used to love spending time here,” Cullen remarked.

“I love spending time with you,” Athena blushed, “and I could never figure out an elegant way to get you to my chambers.”

Cullen chuckled at her and released her, “Let’s go.”

They walked down to the courtyard hand in hand, stopping to kiss every now and again, and of course they ran into Sparkler and I talking (arguing) with Hawke and Anders, “Blondie, she said no.”

“She was trapped in a circle, too. She’ll understand,” Blondie argued.

Cullen growled, a low, quiet sound that only Athena heard, she smiled and said, “I love you.”

He looked down at her, “I love you, too.”

“You didn’t tell me she was in love with a Templar…” Anders growled, fighting the spirits inside him.

"Inquisitor, you should go," I warned, drawing Bianca and pointing her at Anders.

“Varric!” Hawke exclaimed. Cullen pulled Athena behind him so he could be her shield.

“It’s none of his business as to who she’s with, and Curly’s one of the decent ones. I won’t stand here and let them be threatened,” I quietly warned.

“He’s not threatening them,” Hawke defended her man.

“Oh, really? Why is he turning blue?” Sparkler cast barrier over Athena and Cullen.

“Anders, come back to me,” Hawke requested, touching Anders on the arm.

Anders fell to his knees and hung his head, “I’m sorry.”

“We’re here because we were told you knew of a way to separate Anders from the blight,” Hawke explained.

“Where did you hear that?” Athena peaked over Curly’s shoulder (which was no small feat, considering their difference in height.)

“It doesn’t matter where we heard it, is it true?” Anders demanded.

“No. The queen of Fereldan was looking for a cure from the blight. I can close tears in the veil. Other than that, my abilities are unusual, but nothing unheard of. Now, I want to know who told you this,” Athena demanded, moving out from behind Cullen.

“Inquisitor…” He warned.

Athena took hold of his hand, but kept looking at Anders who was slowly getting to his feet, “Why did you lie to Varric?”

“With his hatred of Anders I felt I had no choice,” Hawke remarked.

“This was never about him being pardoned?” I asked, looking back and forth between the ladies. 

“According to Nightingale, no… I’m sorry, Varric,” Athena answered.

“You don’t need to apologize, Duchess. You didn’t lie to me,” I stared at Hawke.

“I am sorry for all you’ve gone through, Anders, but there is nothing I can do to help. Why would you want me to?” Athena investigated.

“If you couldn’t save me, you could at least send me in to the Fade,” Anders looked at Hawke. Hawke looked away with tears in her eyes.

“The only time I use the anchor is when I absolutely have to. I won’t kill you. Now that I’ve refused you, what are you planning to do?” 

“I won’t kill innocent people again,” Anders responded quietly. 

“What do you consider the Commander and I?”

“He’s a Templar,” Anders growled.

“Was a Templar,” Cullen growled back.

“Once a Templar, always a Templar,” Anders responded, angrily.

“Are you threatening the Commander?” Dorian was ready to set fire to Anders.

Anders closed his eyes in defeat, “You will come to no harm from my hands.”

“Thank you,” Athena paused. “Who told you that I could help you?”

“We received this note," Hawke’s voice cracked with emotion. She handed Duchess the note.

Athena was startled by the note, “Where were you when you got this?”

“Weisshaupt,” Hawke responded, “you know who wrote it?”

“We do,” Athena cautiously remarked. 

“When did you receive this?” Cullen read the note over Athena’s shoulder.

“Two months ago,” Anders said.

“You were at Weisshaupt with her?” Sparkler asked.

“I was… Nearby,” Anders responded sheepishly.

Athena looked at Cullen. He said, “We need to talk to Leliana.”

"Hawke and I have some things to discuss, anyway,” I wasn’t quite through with my best friend. 

“You didn’t know that Anders was here?” Athena asked as they walked away. Cullen shook his head. 

“When Leliana said that she talked to you this morning, I had assumed it was about that… I take it that wasn’t the case?”

“Rosalie wants to become a spy…” Cullen grumbled, still quite irritated with his youngest sibling.

“Rosalie wouldn’t last an hour under Leliana,” Athena chuckled.

“It doesn’t bother you that she’s a new mother and wants to do this?” Cullen questioned. 

Athena was confused, “Why would it? Am I supposed to stop doing what I do when I become a mother?” 

“Of course not!” Curly blushed.

“Then why does it matter that she’s a mother?”

“If she goes off to do this, who raises the baby?” Cullen argued.

“She has Timson,” Athena teased, giggling.

Cullen backed Athena against the wall beside the door to Josephine’s office and kissed her, “I do not need that reminder.”

“Why are you two hiding behind Josie’s door?” Nightingale asked on her way out of Ruffles’ office.

Athena chuckled, “We weren’t hiding, we were coming to see you.”

“When were you going to tell me that Anders was here?” Cullen turned to face Leliana.

“After you had slept,” Leliana grinned.

“After he had already left?” Cullen questioned. Leliana nodded. “Why would you tell Athena?”

"Because we were talking about the engagement party, and all that you two missed,” Leliana answered.

"Do I want to know?" Cullen looked at Athena who chuckled.

“I’ll tell you later, and yes, you do. We ran in to Anders and Hawke in the courtyard, they received this note.” Athena handed the note to Leliana.

“Where?” Leliana read the note.

“They received it at Weisshaupt,” Cullen answered.

“Anders went to Weisshaupt?” Leliana asked, shocked.

“He said that he was nearby,” Athena responded, “I wonder where he was the first time Hawke was here.”

"You’re thinking he was "nearby" then.” Cullen stated.

“Selene was hidden in a cave nearby for months… Maybe there’s more than one cave in the area?” Athena guessed.

“I’ll have my scouts check the mountains first thing tomorrow. And I’ll check with my agents near Weisshaupt to see if they’ve heard anything about Solas,” Nightingale offered.

“I’ll send some of the soldiers as well,” Cullen agreed.

“Did another war break out?” Bull asked, coming in with Ruffles.

“No, now that we’re not fighting one, we have the extra resources to search more than the immediate area for caves, passage ways, and such,” Cullen answered.

“I’ll have the Chargers check things out,” Bull offered.

As they were about to go their separate ways a burst of fire lit the sky through the open doors of the main hall. Athena spoke first, recognizing her cousin’s magic, “That’s Dorian.” 

They all rushed out of the door and in to the courtyard. Athena cast barrier on everyone except Anders. Anders was glowing bright blue because Vengeance had taken over. Darius was laying on the ground and Sparkler was ready to light Anders on fire. Athena and Cullen ran over to the prone man. Cullen stood in front of them with sword and shield drawn, Athena got on her knees to check on Darius.

“You and the Commander shouldn’t be out here,” Darius rasped out.

“I’m not going anywhere until I know you’re all right,” Athena replied softly.

“I just had the wind knocked out of me, Inquisitor,” Darius sounded stronger.

“Then why are you bleeding?” Athena asked as she looked down at the ground. She suddenly felt dizzy and her belly had started to cramp.

“From where?” Darius didn’t think he was bleeding.

“Can you sit up?” Athena refused to answer his question as she was slightly alarmed by the amount of blood. Darius moved slowly to a sitting position, and Athena breathed a sigh of relief, “It’s just a cut. Would you like me to heal it for you? “

“Inquisitor…” Cullen warned, quickly glancing behind him. 

“He worries too much. If you’re able to, I would be grateful,” Darius said.

“I know. I love him, anyway,” Athena smiled at Cullen as she healed Darius’ minor cut.

Vengeance Anders, overhearing the conversation, went on a tirade, “Mages loving their jailers. They all deserve to die!” And he started shooting energy balls towards Cullen, Darius, and Athena.

“ANDERS! STOP!” Hawke screamed, trying to pull on his arm. Anders shook her off and pushed her out of the way.

Dorian retaliated. Cullen was blocking the shots coming towards them, and was successful, except for one... right as Athena was casting the barrier spell again, one of the energy balls caught her and knocked her out. (Or so we thought at the time.) Darius caught her and held her until the fighting was done and Anders was Anders again. This time Anders didn’t get to run. As Darius stood with a limp and bleeding Athena in his arms, he said quietly, “Commander, let Bull and I take the prisoner to the dungeon.”

“Maker, no!” Cullen cried out as he took her from Darius.

“Take her to her quarters, I’ll get a healer,” Ruffles ordered, touching Cullen’s arm to make sure she was heard. Cullen nodded and carried Athena up to her quarters.

Bull and Darius took Anders away. Dorian walked with them in case Anders went crazy again. I was left with Hawke, “You said he wouldn’t hurt her.”

“I’m so sorry, Varric,” Hawke was fighting tears.

“She’s pregnant, Hawke. I hope after this she still is…” I walked away from her.

“Anders will pay if the Inquisitor or her child are injured in any way,” Leliana warned and went to check on where the healer was.

**

Cullen sat beside Athena, holding her hand when Ruffles and Leliana arrived with the healer Caerwin. “Commander, I’m going to need you to let go of her hand for just a moment.” Caerwin checked on the baby, and looked at Cullen, “I am very sorry, Commander, but the baby is gone. The Inquisitor should wake up in the next hour or so and given a day or two in bed, she’ll be on the mend.”

Cullen closed his eyes to hide his tears and took hold of Athena’s hand again. Josephine said, “Thank you, Caerwin, we’ll see you out.”

“Commander, if you or the Inquisitor…” Leliana trailed off. Cullen nodded, acknowledging that he heard her.

Leliana had to ask as she closed the door to Duchess’ chambers, “Did the Inquisitor lose the baby because of her using magic or the anchor?” 

Caerwin responded, “No.”

“What about the battle?” Josephine questioned.

“It didn’t help, but she had started to lose the baby last night. Some pregnancies… just aren’t meant to be. There’s nothing anyone could have done to change the outcome,” Caerwin answered.

“When they came to you to make certain she was with child, could you tell then?” Leliana felt as though she had to ask.

“If I had noticed that something was wrong, I would have told them. I don’t believe in keeping the truth from people to protect feelings. The truth always finds a way of coming out, it’s just easier to be honest from the start,” Caerwin explained.

"Thank you, Caerwin," Josephine said.

“I want to check on her in the morning. If that is all right?” Caerwin requested.

“I’m sure that will be fine,” Leliana responded.

Once Caerwin left, Leliana and Josephine looked at each other. I walked in to the hall and immediately had to know, “How is she?”

“Give her a day or two and she’ll be on the mend,” Nightingale answered.

"And the baby?" 

Josephine closed her eyes against the sting of tears and shook her head. I said hoarsely, “I’m going to kill him.”

“The healer said that she had started to lose the baby last night,” Leliana quietly replied.

“Does Curly know that?”

“I’ll tell him in the morning,” Leliana sighed wearily. She had thought with the war being over, life would settle a bit.

“Tell who in the morning?” Dorian asked, walking in with Bull and Darius.

“I’m going to say this once. Athena will be on the mend in a day or two. Unfortunately, the baby is gone. According to the healer, Athena started to lose the baby last night. Cullen knows that the baby is lost, but not when it started. Athena was still unconscious when we left,” Leliana explained.

“He’s going to blame himself,” Darius quietly remarked.

“I’m not going back in there tonight. The morning will be soon enough,” Leliana informed us.

**

Cullen held Athena's hand for the next hour. It didn’t take long for Darius’ prediction to come true. Cullen chastised himself for putting Athena in harm’s way, if they had just stayed in his quarters she and the baby would be fine now. He also thought his powers at dispelling or stopping magic were weakened because of not taking lyrium. If he had continued, Athena and the baby would be safe. 

Athena moaned when she woke. Cullen whispered hoarsely, “Caerwin didn’t say that you would be in pain.”

“The last thing I remember is healing Darius…” Athena did not want to admit how much pain she was in.

“You were hit by an energy ball before you could get a barrier up,” Cullen choked out.

Athena’s free hand flew to her belly, “The baby?”

Cullen shook his head, fighting the tears that threatened. Athena closed her eyes as unending tears flowed from them. Cullen climbed in to bed with her and held her as she cried for most of the night. When Athena had cried herself to sleep, Cullen gently pulled away from her to not disturb her. He scribbled a note for her on her desk, and headed to the small Chantry to pray. He prayed for hours and couldn’t find the peace he once knew in prayer. Swearing, he went to his office, and stared at a box of lyrium.

**

The morning dawned to cloud covered skies at Skyhold, it fit the somber mood perfectly. Caerwin, with Leliana and Josephine went to check on Athena. When they entered they saw Athena sitting up in bed and no Cullen, Leliana asked, “Where’s the Commander?”

“He left before I woke," Athena looked away from them.

“He didn’t leave a note?” Ruffles was shocked.

“If he did, I can’t find it,” Athena answered with her voice catching.

"How are you feeling, Inquisitor?" Caerwin asked gently, standing over her.

“Like I was run over by wild horses,” Athena closed her eyes to hide the tears.

“The Commander told you?” Leliana asked.

Athena nodded her head and gave voice to her fears, “He blames me, doesn’t he?” 

“If he does, I’m going to-" Leliana turned on her heel and left to find Cullen before finishing her thought.

Caerwin finished checking Athena, “I am so sorry, but you started to lose the baby some time before the battle. There wasn’t   
anything you or the Commander could have done to keep the baby. Some pregnancies just aren’t meant to be.”

“I had been in a lot of pain and got very ill the night before, is that why?” 

"Yes,” Caerwin patted her hand, “you’ll need to stay in bed for today and tomorrow except for water closet breaks, but, I can take the soreness away.”

Athena closed her eyes as her tears spilled over, “No, thank you.”

“Thank you, Caerwin. Do you mind showing yourself out?” Josephine requested.

“Not at all, Ambassador. I’ll check on you tomorrow, Inquisitor,” Caerwin said as she left.

Ruffles sat beside Athena and took hold of Duchess’ hand. Athena asked, “Where is Anders?”

“You don’t need to worry about that right now,” Ruffles gently chastised. Her friend looked so pale and weak.

Athena’s eyes filled with tears, “Josie, please? Anything to keep my mind off of…”

“Of course, my lady. I will be back in five minutes,” Josephine stood and there was a knock on the door, “I’m going to go get that.” Opening the door she saw me and Sparkler standing there, “Thank the Maker! You wouldn’t happen to know where Darius is would you?”

“He’s with Cullen,” Sparkler answered.

“At least one of us knows where he is,” Josephine murmured.

"What does that mean?" I questioned, very worried, or suspicious… or both. (it was both.)

“Cullen left before Athena woke and she couldn’t find a note.” Ruffles dropped down to a whisper, “Athena is thinking that Cullen blames her. As far as I know, he still thinks it’s because of the battle last night.”

Sparkler shook his head, wishing his cousin didn’t have to endure this, "How is she?"

“Hurting. She asked me where Anders was because she needs something to take her mind off of what happened,” Ruffles explained.

“Then it’s a good thing we’re here,” I winked at Josephine.

Sparkler was already up the stairs, "Hello, Cousin. I come bearing gifts.”

He caught Athena off guard as she was staring at her left hand and at the anchor. She jumped when she heard his voice, but recovered enough to offer him a watery smile, “Do you now?” 

“Yes, it’s a dwarf and he goes by the name of Varric,” Dorian smiled at her.

“Very funny, Sparkler. Ruffles is going to see if she can track down Tiny and maybe we can play a game of Wicked Grace,” I winked at Duchess.

“I’m not allowed to get out of bed for the next two days except water closet breaks,” Athena informed us.

“And you’re actually going to listen to that?” I was quite surprised.

“I always try to listen. I’m just not very successful at it,” Athena blushed.

“I’m sure something can be arranged to assist in this listening thing,” I already had a couple ideas.

“Until Josephine gets back, what would you like to do?” Sparkler smiled his brightest.

“Will you tell one of your stories?” Duchess looked at me, tears shining in her violet eyes.

“Only too happy to oblige, Duchess,” I smiled and started in on the story of Tallis.

**

Nightingale, on the other hand, was not pleased about having to track Curly down. She threw open Cullen’s office door to see Cullen and Darius struggling over something. Not caring, she asked, “Why aren’t you with Athena?”

“Let it go, Darius,” Cullen growled.

“No, you’ve come too far,” Darius growled back.

“Why aren’t you with Athena?” Leliana shouted to be heard.

“Because what happened is my fault,” Cullen sighed and dropped down into his chair behind his desk. The guilt he was feeling was plain for all to see.

“Lyrium isn’t going to make the guilt you feel go away. And you know that,” Darius was finally able to get the box from Cullen.

“You came here to take lyrium?! When Athena needs you to be with her now, more than ever?!” Leliana was incredulous. She could not believe he was being so selfish.

“I couldn’t protect her. With lyrium I can,” Cullen responded.

"You didn't tell him?" Leliana asked Darius.

“As soon as I came in he was opening this,” Darius showed her the box with the lyrium draughts in it.

“And you were fighting over it,” Leliana surmised, “Athena thinks you blame her for what happened.”

“Maker’s breath, why would she think that?!” Cullen exclaimed.

“She woke and you were gone without an explanation,” Leliana raised her eyebrow at him, expecting an explanation.

“I left a note….” Cullen closed his eyes and groaned, remembering where he left it, “on her desk.”

Leliana shook her head, keeping the tongue lashing she had wanted to give him to herself, “Would you like to hear what Caerwin said?”

“Yes,” Cullen answered. 

“By the time the battle started the baby was mostly lost. There was no way to prevent the loss,” Leliana said gently.

“Now will you stop thinking that taking lyrium is the only way to protect her?” Darius questioned.

“She was still knocked unconscious because of magic,” Cullen looked away from them. They didn’t get it, it was his responsibility to protect her, and he failed.

“Cullen, even when you were using lyrium, you couldn’t stop all magic,” Darius reminded him.

"I know Athena supported your decision to not take lyrium. I doubt that support has changed. Why don’t you wait until you can talk to her about it?” Nightingale suggested. Cullen gave a single nod of his head.

“Now will you go see what trouble Dorian and Varric has gotten your love into?” Darius begged. He had been fighting with Cullen for well over an hour.

“So long as her small clothes aren’t pinned to a chantry board she’ll be fine,” Leliana winked at Darius.

Darius put the box of lyrium draughts on Curly's desk. As the three of them left, Cullen looked wistfully back at the box, paused, and then closed the door. As he opened the door to Athena’s chambers they heard her softly chuckling. Cullen smiled hearing it. 

I finished telling a story, and complimented her, “You know, Duchess, you’re not that bad of a story teller.”

"That’s very sweet, Varric, but I’ll leave the majority of the story telling to you,” Athena smiled.

“What story did you tell?” Darius asked.

“I’ll tell you at lunch,” Sparkler winked at him. 

Josephine looked out the window, “It is time for lunch! I’ll have something sent up for you two.”

“You’re leaving?” Athena suddenly became very nervous.

“You need your rest, my friend. I promised Bull that I would have lunch with him today,” Ruffles gently hugged Athena.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t stay this morning,” Nightingale apologized, hugging our heroine.

“It’s all right. I have another day of this,” Athena looked down at the bed.

“I can stay,” I teased.

“Dwarf,” Curly warned.

“No, Varric, I’m going to need your assistance,” Leliana ordered.

Once we left, Cullen went over to her desk and grabbed the note he had written, “I wrote it this morning before I left. In my haste I forgot to place it where you would be able to reach it.”

Athena read the note and then looked at him, “Why were you in such a hurry to leave?”

“Because I failed in keeping you from harm,” Cullen took hold of her hands as he sat beside her.

“Cullen, you were standing in front of Darius and I, fighting off shot after shot after shot. You can’t blame yourself for that…” Athena paused, because her violet eyes were filling with tears again, “and the battle didn’t cause…”

“Shhh, I know,” Cullen moved closer to her.

Athena looked away from him, “I understand if you blame me."

“Athena, you did nothing to cause what happened,” Cullen wished, more than anything, that he could take away the heartache he saw in her eyes.

“How can you be so sure?” Athena choked out.

“Because I am,” Cullen gently reassured her.

Athena closed her eyes as tears started falling from them and whispered, “I’m not.” 

Cullen pulled her in to the safety and strength of his arms and held her as she cried, he whispered, “I love you.”


	33. Chapter 33

Nightingale and I headed to the dungeon, “I’m surprised Anders didn’t put up more of a fight when he was locked up.”

“Maybe Hawke was right and he has changed,” Leliana hoped.

“Not enough,” My finger itching to pull Bianca’s trigger.

Hawke was sitting outside of Anders' cell, “Varric…”

I shook my head at her, too angry to speak with her. Leliana proceeded to ask, “Who gave you the note?”

“An elf child,” Hawke quietly answered.

"She lost the baby," I hoped something would jar Hawke out of this stubbornness.

Hawke closed her eyes, “I’m sorry.”

"No,” we heard Anders whisper brokenly.

“Did you plan to attack the Inquisitor?” Leliana took that as her opening to interrogate him.

“Yes. It was never my intention to hurt her. Only to get her to judge me… Or kill me,” Anders sounded despondent.

“Andraste’s ass, Blondie. Is violence your answer to everything?” It was a good thing I had left Bianca behind.

Anders hung his head, “It shouldn’t be that way.”

“No, it shouldn’t. If you had been honest, she would have done everything in her power to help you. If you had shown remorse for those you killed, the Inquisitor would have been merciful. But you attacked those she loved and hurt her in a way that is unforgivable. I don’t see how Hawke can love you after all you’ve done.” I turned my attention to Hawke, “You should have been honest with me.”

“The Inquisitor’s changed you, Varric,” Hawke remarked quietly.

“She’s never given me a reason to distrust her, and she has saved my life countless times. How can someone like that not change you? Not want to do better? I’m a better person for knowing her. She fought to save the world and succeeded, and this is how you repay her?” I looked at Leliana, “I’m sorry, Nightingale, I can’t be here.”

Leliana nodded, “I’ll walk out with you.”

Once we were out of the dungeons I asked, “Duchess won’t have to judge Blondie will she?”

"I don't know. I hope not,” She paused as it started to rain, “I don’t even want to tell Cullen about what Anders told us.”

“But you have to,” I sighed. Nightingale nodded. “It’s almost time for dinner. Do you think they’d be up for some company?”

“When I talk to them, I can ask,” She answered.

“I would like to be there when you tell Curly,” I requested.

“That’s where I’m heading next.” We walked up to Athena’s quarters in silence, once there Leliana knocked on the door.

It took Curly a couple minutes to get to the door, when he did he closed it behind him. Leliana asked, “How is she?”

“She cried herself to sleep,” Cullen spoke barely above a whisper.

“How are you?” I questioned, Curly looked like he hadn’t slept in a week… Even his hair was messed up.

“Wishing I could take her pain away like she does for me… For everyone,” he sighed.

“Josie said that Caerwin offered to take the soreness away. Athena refused,” Leliana focused on the physical pain.

"She told me. She said it was to remind her to stay in bed,” Cullen braced a shoulder against the wall and crossed his arms.

"It also reminds her of what was lost. She’s blaming herself?”

Cullen nodded his head, “What did you need?”

“We talked to Anders and Hawke…” Leliana hesitated, briefly wondering if this could wait. Shaking herself of the notion, she forged ahead, “He intended to attack Athena so she would be the one to judge him. He did say that he never meant to hurt her.”

Cullen laughed bitterly. If Athena was well, he would have went to the sparring ring for hours.

“We let them believe that the battle was the reason that Duchess lost the baby,” I told him in case he decided to kill Anders himself… I know I was sorely tempted to.

Cullen shook his head in disbelief of what Blondie was capable of, “Tell Darius to have the soldiers go out at first light and search for any caves or explosives. Is there anywhere else Anders can be held?”

“I’ll look in to it,” Leliana said and at that moment dinner came.

“Commander?” One of the servants asked nervously.

"Give me one of the trays. Keep the rest,” Cullen ordered and they were promptly followed.

“Not hungry?” I asked once the servants left.

“Athena always says they send too much food. They’re always incredibly noisy when they come in.”

“Josie or I will be bringing Caerwin in the morning to check on Athena. We’ll let you get back to her,” Leliana informed him. Cullen nodded and went back to Athena.

As he sat the tray of food down, Athena started to stir, "Cullen?”

“I’m right here,” he said softly. “Are you hungry?”

She sat up in bed and saw the single tray, “A little.”

Cullen went to her, picked her up from the bed, and carried her to the couch so she could eat. Athena was shocked, “You’re breaking the healer’s orders?”

“You won’t be walking, and it’s only to eat, but yes,” he sat down beside her with their food, “I thought you could use a change of scenery.”

Athena gently kissed him, “Thank you.”

“What was the story you told everyone this morning?” Cullen wanted to keep her mind off of the reason she was confined to the bed.

“You don’t want to know,” Athena took a bite of her food.

“Tell me anyway,” Cullen implored her.

“If you’re certain…” Athena trailed off.

Curly kissed her, “I am.”

“At the circle there had been a harrowing where several Templars had been injured. There was one Templar that the others wouldn’t do anything for, so they brought me in. However, it was the middle of the night, and I was never one for wearing anything to bed... There were five templars sent to collect me, not one of them thought to knock.

“Thankfully I was up reading and wrapped myself in a blanket before they saw anything. They didn’t give me any time to get dressed, so in my blanket finery I walked through most of the circle to the infirmary, with mages and templars staring at me. I healed the templar, and walked back to my room. The templar had been delirious and for weeks he told everyone about how he was healed by a blanket.”

Cullen chuckled, “I always wondered how you were able to wrap a blanket around you to the point of it looking like a dress.”

“Talent necessitated by need,” Athena laughed softly.

“Why wouldn’t the other healers touch him?” He found that part of her story odd.

“I don’t know. I guessed that it was because of the delirium.”

"How did you tell that story without blushing this morning?” Cullen took away their empty plates.

“That’s because I was already blushing…” Athena had a pink tinge lighting her cheeks again remembering the story that had her blushing in the first place.

“Why?” 

“Because Varric decided to tell a story that involved you not being the first one to see my talent with a blanket…” Athena trailed off, the tinge turning red.

“Why wasn’t I?” Curly wondered what shenanigans we had gotten her into.

“Sera had too much to drink one night and decided to shoot off a few arrows because the flaming ones looked like shooting stars. She lit my tent on fire, and I didn’t have enough time to put anything else on… it was a good thing we weren’t far from Haven,” Athena’s blush became more prominent at the memory.

Cullen waited for her to continue, when she didn’t he prodded, “And that was a good thing?” 

“If we had been too far away, I would have been traipsing through the Hinterlands in a blanket… Which was something I had no desire to do. So, we went back to Haven so I could have clothes again,” Athena chuckled.

“How did I miss that?” Cullen asked, more to himself than Athena.

“It was the middle of the night when we got back…” Athena responded.

“Haven wasn’t that big, and at the time I often took the night watches.”

Athena shrugged, “I don’t know, but I’m glad you did.”

“You are?” Cullen was surprised by that.

“Yes! I already had a crush on you. I had Bull telling me I should show up in front of you naked, Dorian trying to give me tips on how to flirt with you, and Varric making up stories about us. I did not need you seeing me in a blanket before I knew that the feelings were mutual,” Athena blushed from forehead to chin.

Cullen chuckled softly and teased her, “If I had, Leliana and Josephine wouldn’t have had to trick me…”

“Cullen!” Athena exclaimed. 

He kissed her, “I did not need to know about Sera lighting your tent on fire.”

Athena chuckled, “I lost one of Varric’s books that night.” 

“Does he know?”

“And have him kill Sera? No, he does not know,” Athena shifted uncomfortably because her body was still healing.

“Which one was it?” Cullen carried her to bed.

“The one I caught Cassandra reading.”

“Does Cassandra know that you’ve read it?” He undressed and got in to bed with her.

“No! Where would the fun be in that?” Athena’s violet eyes got wide.

Cullen chuckled putting his arm around her, “I guess that’s true.”

Athena laid on his chest for a while listening to his heart beat, and her thoughts invariably turned to what they lost, “Cullen?”

“Yes, my love?” He softly responded.

“Thank you,” She rasped out, closing her eyes against the sting of tears.

“Any time,” he whispered, holding her tight because he felt her tears falling on his chest.

**

I knocked on Duchess’ door. I hadn’t seen or heard from her in about a week and I was worried. I waited patiently for someone to answer, hoping it would be Athena. It was Curly, and he looked frazzled, “What do you need, Varric?”

I handed him a copy of Swords And Shields. Cullen had got word to me that Athena’s copy had met with mishap, “I was hoping to visit with Duchess.”

Cullen sighed, “She doesn’t want to see anyone right now. I’m sorry.”

“As soon as she does, you’ll let me know?” 

Cullen nodded and closed the door. He sat down beside Athena who was in bed, “Varric’s worried about you.”

Athena shrugged, fighting tears. Cullen took hold of her hands, “At least walk with me to the balcony?”

Athena shook her head, her tears overflowing, “I want our baby back.”

Cullen laid my book beside her and enfolded Athena into his arms as she cried. He whispered that he loved her over and over again. Hoping that it would ease her heartache.

**

Weeks went by since Anders’s attack and Orzammar (quick break, Orzammar is the seat of the once great dwarven empire nestled in the Deep Roads… If you would like to learn more about the Deep Roads, read Tale Of The Champion.) came calling for the Inquisition’s help. Needless to say, Curly was not happy…

“Absolutely not! She just started to leave her chambers yesterday! You cannot ask her to do this!” Cullen paced furiously in the war room.

“I’m not asking her to do this, but no one else has answered their call for help,” Leliana argued with him.

“Our ties with Orzammar would be greatly strengthened with this,” Josephine reminded the other two.

“This isn’t walking through the streets of Orzammar where she would be relatively safe. They want her to go into the Deep Roads where she will face all manner of creatures, including darkspawn… If she were to get hurt by one, it would be…” Cullen stopped, unable to continue as he fought tears. Looking at the door to the war room, he saw Athena standing there and rasped out, “It’s only been a few weeks.”

Josephine and Leliana made a quiet exit so our lovers could talk. Athena closed the door behind them and turned to face him, “Cullen…”

“I cannot go with you. Every time you’re pulled away something happens that I need to stay here,” he sighed, “and I know you aren’t fully healed.”

“If I went to Caerwin and had her heal me, would you worry less?” Athena asked.

“No,” He answered, brutally honest, “I’d worry more… You cry yourself to sleep, what little sleep you get, and you wake up crying. If you’re left alone for more than five minutes, you have tears in your eyes.” 

“Cullen, I can’t let others suffer because I’m an emotional wreck,” Athena wore her pain like a shroud, and made no move to go to the man she loves more than life itself.

“And if your emotions get the best of you? Make you careless? How many more would suffer?” Cullen turned away from her and placed his hands on the table with his head hanging down and begged, “Give yourself a little more time?”

“I can’t. They need the Inquisition,” She responded softly, “I need to do this… Maybe getting out of Skyhold for a bit would be a good thing.”

“If all you want is to get out of Skyhold…”

“I would have to go alone. You said that you can’t go anywhere right now,” Athena interrupted him.

Cullen closed his brown eyes against the sting of tears and rasped out, “Athena…”

She ran to him then, holding on to him tightly, “I love you, Cullen.”

“I love you, too,” he whispered as he slowly wrapped his arms around her. 

The next morning we left for the Deep Roads via the Storm Coast. Cullen let Tiny, Sparkler, and I know that we were absolutely not allowed to let Duchess out of our sight. They kissed goodbye and we were off.

When we broke for camp that night, Duchess tried to hide in her tent. I wouldn’t let her… Usually I don’t have to threaten her though, that night I did, “Duchess, don’t make me send Tiny in there after you!”

“Varric!” She growled as she came out of her tent.

I smiled serenely at her. We ate in companionable silence, after dinner, I had to ask, “Are you sure this is wise, Duchess?”

Athena had been staring down at her left hand, transfixed by the anchor and wondering if it caused her to lose the baby. Startled from her reverie, she looked at me, “I’m sorry?”

“This trip to the Deep Roads, is it wise?” I asked warmed my hands on the fire.

Athena sighed heavily, “Does it matter? They need our help.”

“It matters if this is a suicide mission,” Sparkler was not pulling any punches, he was incredibly worried for his cousin… As were we all.

Athena growled angrily and stalked away. Dorian got up to go after her, but Tiny stopped him, “Let her go. The boss needs to feel like she hasn’t failed. Winning is easy, especially when you consistently win against seemingly insurmountable odds. Figuring out what is causing these earthquakes will do her good.”

“So long as she doesn’t kill herself in the process,” I mumbled as I watched Duchess pace at the edge of our camp.

**

Cullen wasn't having any easier a time of it. When he would spar, he would hit harder, so hard that only Darius would take him on. He also threw himself into his work, not sleeping, barely eating, and not pacing to Nightingale or Ruffles to see if there had been word from Duchess. 

Leliana and Josephine were so worried about him that they were having a meeting with Darius to see what they could do to help him. Which he walked in on and overheard Nightingale say, “If the Inquisitor survives her mission she may become a widow before she’s able to be a wife.”

“You’re the one that told her about it!” Cullen exclaimed angrily.

“Commander, the Inquisitor will survive. Dorian, Varric, and Bull would protect her with their lives,” Josephine, the voice of reason and hope.

“I’m not as worried about the Inquisitor… It’s been two weeks since she left and this is the first I’ve seen you! I cannot believe I’m going to say this but,” Nightingale sighed irritably, “I miss your pacing and asking for information on Athena.”

Cullen narrowed his eyes at her, “You didn’t have to hold her as she cried. You weren’t the one desperately trying to get her out of her chambers for weeks… I have no desire to hear from anyone but her.”

“She hasn’t written you?” Josephine was surprised by this. Athena had always written Cullen, even when she thought her love was just a crush.

“She hasn’t written to anyone. Have you written to her?” Leliana asked him.

Cullen shook his head and left, feeling and looking defeated. The trio he left behind looked at each other, unsure of how to help him. 

Cullen went to his office, his scowl warning away any that would dare approach him. Closing the door he leaned against it and hung his head, fighting tears. He rasped out, “Write her? And say what? That I want to be with her? That I don’t want her to die? That I’m sorry I couldn’t protect her?!” 

He punched the door then, angrier at himself than anyone else. Stalking over to his desk he sat and wrote one sentence, and then his eyes lit on the box of lyrium draughts. Already defeated, he gave into the constant call of lyrium and took his first draught in years.

**

In the Deep Roads we met Shaper Valta and the commander of the Legion of the Dead, Renn. With them we fought darkspawn to establish a base of operations. Once the main camp was established, we investigated an ancient thaig that had darkspawn crawling all over it. 

Athena was quiet but respectful, and we didn’t want to question her in front of people we didn’t know. Continuing past the Deep Roads we searched for the cause of the earthquakes and Valta kept going on about a Titan (dwarven culture… All “acceptable” history). We also got to fight lyrium infused dwarves called the sha-brytol. They killed Renn, Valta was not happy (I got the feeling that there was more than friendship there.) 

Athena figured out that it was this Titan thing causing the earthquakes and that we were inside it (disturbing.) Valta agreed, we fought a Titan guardian thing, Valta was hit by magic and disappeared further in to the Titan and we made the slow trek back to the surface. Stopping off at the camp, there was a letter waiting for Duchess. Walking away from everyone she opened it and read the single sentence: I miss you. Cullen (real personal there, Curly.)

And we watched, helpless, as her shoulders shook. Dorian was the first to approach her, when he saw her tears he pulled her in for a hug and didn’t let go until the shaking had stopped. He softly said, “You should write him back.”

With that suggestion she pulled out paper and pen, her letter was far more personal:

Dear Cullen,   
I’m sorry that I haven’t written, I didn’t want to worry you. We’re leaving the Deep Roads and we’ll be back to Skyhold soon. I miss you, too. I love you.  
Athena

We broke for camp when we reached the surface, and I sighed in great relief, happy to see the sky again. Duchess also seemed to breathe easier, a couple times I caught her almost smiling. She clutched the letter that Curly sent her as if it was the one thing to keep her from shattering. Bull and Dorian had gone to their tents, as we had decided that first day to take shifts in watching Athena’s tent at night. I watched Duchess for a bit and then I asked, “Ready to go home?”

She sighed, and looked at the anchor again, like she could divine answers from it, “I want to see Cullen again.”

I smiled at her, “I’ll take that. Go get some sleep.”

**

Curly received Athena’s letter a day before we arrived. Unfortunately, it only improved his mood for about five minutes. Leliana and Darius had decided it was a good time to talk to him about rumors running rampant through the barracks. Darius sat across from him, “The soldiers need to see you. You would not believe what they’re saying about you.”

Cullen was unfazed as he continued to run his fingers over Duchess’ words. Leliana had a turn, “Cullen, you seem… Different. Did something happen between you and Athena?”

“No.” 

“Just so you are aware, Commander, that is one of the rumors. There’s also a rumor that you’re taking lyrium again. You aren’t, are you?” Darius inquired, they had only been getting one word answers out of him for weeks, it seemed today was not going to be any different.

Cullen scowled at him, refusing to answer. Instead he informed them, “The Inquisitor is on her way back.”

Darius sighed in relief, “Thank the Maker.”

They stood to leave and Leliana warned him, “I hope you aren’t this ornery with her. She deserves someone that is willing to welcome her home with open arms.”

Cullen snorted in derision as they left, when the door closed he said to it, “I love her.” For the next day he did everything he could to get rid of the funk he had fallen into. 

**

We arrived at lunch time, and instead of Curly pacing at the gate, one of his messengers met her and handed her a note: Meet me at the crumbling tower.

“The Commander’s being romantic? I didn’t think he had it in him,” Sparkler lightly teased.

“Shut up, Sparkler. Go, Duchess, we’ll let Nightingale know everything,” I told her.

“Thank you!” Athena rushed to her room to change out of her armor and wash. Then made her way to the tower. She found Curly pacing on the floor of the tower. “Cullen?”

“I saw you go in to the keep… And then I…” He responded nervously.

“I wanted to change out of my armor and get clean first,” Athena explained.

“I’m sorry, I…” He paused as he walked over to her and hugged her, “Maker, I missed you.”

“I missed you, too. I’m sorry for not writing. I…” Athena looked up at him with tears lighting her violet eyes.

Cullen kissed her, “It’s all right. I should have written as well. I planned a lunch for us.”

“Where is it?” Athena asked looking around and not seeing any sign of food. Cullen lifted his eyes skyward.

“I thought I always had to drag you up there,” Athena was happy to be in her lover’s arms again and they ascended to the top of the tower. Where a picnic basket of their favorite foods hid. A blanket spread out for them to sit on and a few sprigs of heather thrown about.

“How are you?” Cullen asked after they ate their fill.

“I’m fully healed, if that’s what you mean… And you?” Athena moved to lean against him, desperate to feel his arms around her. But she noticed an odd scent, one she immediately dismissed as her senses still playing with her.

“I haven’t been in the best of moods…” Cullen trailed off as he wrapped his arms around her, finally able to relax.

“Neither was I,” Athena closed her eyes and sighed. Cullen half smiled, remembering the first time he heard that sigh.

**

It was taking less effort to get Athena to smile and Cullen to not have someone shadowing her every move. Athena went to her tower whenever she couldn’t be with Cullen, and that is where Cole and I found her one morning. Cole whispered, “Let me help?”

Athena turned to face him (I was waiting for them on the solid part of the tower), quickly dashing away her tears, “I’ll be all right, Cole.” 

“You’ve been hurting for weeks. It’s not your fault, it just wasn’t time yet,” Cole softly replied.

Athena smiled sadly and turned away from him, “I wish I could convince myself of that.”

“Why can’t you?” Cole was quite confused.

“Because if the time wasn’t right or wasn’t meant to be, why was I pregnant at all?” Athena asked.

“Shit,” I cursed upon hearing her answer, and I climbed up the ladder, “Duchess, you have to stop torturing yourself this way.” 

“Why should I, Varric? I defeated Corypheus, closed the breach, not once, but twice. I continue to fight all sorts of demons and creatures, and I still try to help those that are hurting by all that’s happened. With all that Cullen has gone through, don’t we deserve something normal?” Athena stopped, choking back a sob, “If it wasn’t meant to be this time, will it ever?”

“Athena, I know you’re mourning. You have every right to be in pain, to be angry, but eventually you’re going to have to let it go.” I responded as gently as I could.

Athena closed her eyes and a sigh shuddered through her, “I know… I just can’t, not yet.”

"At least you're talking about it. Curly worries me,” I remarked.

A little smile broke through her tears, “When hasn’t he worried you?”

I chuckled, “True. Can we get down from here please?” 

“Yes, I have a meeting anyway,” Athena went down the ladder first.

“Who with?” I asked as we made our way down from the tower.

“You wouldn’t like it if I told you,” Athena evaded. 

“Duchess, he attacked you,” I reminded her with more force than was necessary. (Yes, Anders was still being held at Skyhold.)

“Kirkwall wants me to judge him for blowing up the Chantry as well…” Athena remarked.

“I don’t like this,” I was very worried.

“You’re not the only one. Leliana’s going to be with me when I talk to him,” she stopped in front of the dungeon’s door.

“I want to help. You’re uncertain you’ll get the truth from him,” Cole offered. 

“Cole, I don’t want to put you in danger,” Athena refused.

“He won’t hurt me… We’re kind of… The same,” Cole reassured her.

Athena looked at me for help. I shrugged, “The Kid has a sense for when he can help people.”

Athena sighed, “All right, Cole, but at the first sign of trouble I’m getting you out of there.”

“Does Curly know you’re doing this?” I asked.

“He knows that I have to judge him….” Athena answered.

“But he doesn’t know that you and Leliana are meeting with him privately?” 

Athena shook her head, “To question him at his judgement is a risk I’m not willing to take.”

“Inquisitor!” Nightingale walked up to us.

Athena slowly shook her head, “Leliana, please tell me you heard from the queen?”

“I have, and she was successful on her mission,” Leliana responded.

“Excellent news. Cole wants to join us,” Athena opened the door.

“Duchess, do you know if Hawke is in there?” I inquired.

“If she is do you want me to tell her that you wish to speak with her?” Athena offered.

“Yeah, I should apologize. After all, she was just defending the man she loved,” I grumbled.

Athena half chuckled, “You’re a good person, Varric.”

“Only because of you,” I winked at her.

Athena closed her eyes and shook her head, and asked Nightingale and Kid, “Ready?” And they followed her in.

I went in search of Curly and I found him finishing up at the sparring ring, “Who did Athena tell you not to kill?”

“No one, why?” Curly was confused.

“Because you usually do this when you want to kill someone,” I snickered. I’ve made a tidy sum of money betting on Curly’s sparring.

Cullen looked behind him and smirked, “Darius lost a bet.”

“No wonder Athena likes playing Wicked Grace more than chess,” I quipped.

“Why are you giving him ideas, Varric?” Sparkler helped Darius out of the ring.

“I’d bet a lot of money that some form of sparring between those two is not a new idea,” I chuckled.

“I am not discussing this with you three,” Curly blushed slightly as we followed him to his office.

“I haven’t seen him blush in weeks,” Darius joined in.

“Maker’s breath,” Curly swore, “Did Athena need something?”

“No, why?” I made myself comfortable in Curly’s office.

“I saw you two talking at the tower,” Cullen stood behind his desk.

“Has she been sending messengers?” Sparkler sniffed in the air. I thought it was him being Sparklery but Dorian told me later that he thought he smelled lyrium.

“No…” Cullen trailed off. 

“Miss having a constant watch on her?” Darius teased.

“I didn’t,” Cullen blushed.

“Between you, Nightingale, and Ruffles, yes, you did,” I chuckled.

Cullen shook his head, “Is there a reason for this visit?”

“You could use a break?” Darius was quick to respond.

“I thought that was what your defeat was…” Curly smirked again.

“Ha ha, Commander,” Darius griped.

“I have work that needs to be done and it doesn’t involve you three,” Cullen had the audacity to try to kick us out.

“I’m your second in command, you’ll have need of me eventually,” Darius smiled gleefully. He enjoyed pestering Curly just as much as the rest of us.

“I should relieve you of your duties,” Cullen sighed.

“That wouldn’t be any fun,” Darius got up to leave with Dorian.

I stayed behind, my worry prompting me to ask, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, Varric. Thank you for your concern,” Cullen dismissed me. I left, trusting that he would talk to Athena if he was having a hard time. 

As I went to see if Hawke was available to talk, I passed Sparkler heading back to Curly’s office, “Miss him already?”

“Very funny. There was a book I was supposed to borrow from the Commander and I forgot to grab it,” Dorian answered. I chuckled and went on my way. 

Sparkler entered without knocking and saw Cullen with his back to the door drinking something, “Commander?”

Cullen hid the vial behind his back as he turned to face Dorian, “Yes?”

“What were you drinking?” Dorian sniffed the air again.

“What did you need?” Cullen intentionally ignored Sparkler’s question.

“I came back for the book I had asked to borrow earlier. You aren’t taking lyrium again are you?” 

“Why would you ask that?” Cullen evaded.

“Because lyrium has a distinct smell to it, and it smells like lyrium in here,” Dorian moved more in to the office so he could close the door. 

Cullen sat down and sighed, placing the vial on his desk, "Only when I’m in pain.”

“I thought you were set against taking lyrium again. What changed?” Sparkler sat down as well.

“I couldn’t protect her. I couldn’t go with her to the Deep Roads. I couldn’t save our baby…” Cullen’s list was quite long.

“You know the risks of battle, and so does Athena. You did everything you could that night. From what I’ve been told, there wasn’t anything that could be done to save the baby. Have you talked to Athena about this? Did she change her mind?” 

“She doesn’t know, and she’s not going to find out,” Cullen said stubbornly. 

“I won’t tell her, but you know she is going to find out. Why are you doing this?” 

“How can I ask her to fight my battles when she has battles of her own to fight?” Cullen got up to pace, “She hasn’t slept through the night since the baby was lost.” He paused, “Some nights she cries out in her sleep and she has never done that. Besides holding her, there is absolutely nothing I can do.”

“Her nightmares are nothing unusual. When we were fighting the war, it happened about once a week. She never talked about it, but I always got the impression that either the horrors of the day invaded her dreams or it was something in her past.” Dorian paused, “You’ve both suffered a very painful and tragic loss. You need time to mourn, and that may be why her nightmares have returned.”

“Why didn’t she tell me?” Cullen wondered as he sat back down.

“The only reason I knew of Athena’s nightmares was because I was awake. If she hasn’t had those dreams with you, that should tell you volumes of how safe she feels with you,” Sparkler explained quietly. “When did you start taking lyrium again?”

“While you were in the Deep Roads,” Cullen replied, “it was just to stop the pain.”

“But you’re in pain more often now?” Dorian guessed.

Cullen nodded, “I stopped once before, when things get back to normal, I’ll stop again.”

Dorian shook his head, “You are the Commander of the Inquisition and a former Templar. You are engaged to the Inquisitor, Herald of Andraste, and a mage...” He decided on a different tact, “”Normal” is a fantasy that we tell ourselves so we can pretend that life won’t knock us down… or that when it does, things will go back to the way they were. You, above all, know that life doesn’t ever work that way.”

“Am I supposed to tell her everything then? Doesn’t she have enough to worry about?” Cullen started pacing again.

“I know you’re trying to protect her, it’s noble but incredibly stupid. Athena is going to see this as you not trusting her, or worse, blaming her for all that’s happened and that is something she definitely does not need,” Dorian responded.

“I can’t cause her more pain,” Cullen whispered.

“Then don’t. Without you she feels as though she has nothing. Since I’ve met her, you have been the one thing where she has felt completely safe, and dare I say… normal. Even when you two were just mooning over each other,” Dorian gently teased and then grew serious, “Don’t take that away from her when she needs it most. I’d also be willing to bet that she does similar things for you.” 

Cullen nodded in response, thinking over all that Dorian said. When Darius came in…

**

Leliana, Cole, and Athena walked out of the dungeon hours later. Leliana asked, “What are you thinking, Athena?”

“That I don’t want to judge him…” Athena quietly said.

“You understand why he did the things he did?” Leliana guessed.

“I do, but it still doesn’t make blowing up the Chantry right. I’ve seen some Templars at their worst, but then there are some that are amazing. What I don’t understand is how someone as complicated as Anders is can only see one thing when it comes to Templars and anyone associated with them. But then, I guess I’m the same way when it comes to Kern…” Athena trailed off.

Leliana chuckled, “Athena, you don’t blame all men for the actions of one. You also don’t use violence to get what you want.”

“Don’t I? Why did I have to fight Corypheus then? Why do I have to continue to clean up his mess? Even here I’ve had to fight demons,” Athena looked away.

“Vengeance is hard and angry and cold. You are warm, you help, you protect,” Cole tried to reassure her.

“You fight to save people. You also saved the world by defeating Corypheus. There isn’t a comparison here,” Leliana was stern with her response.

“He fought to save mages, and in doing so, freed me as well. Without his actions, whether or not I approve them… There would have been no need for a conclave, and I would still be in the circle.”

“You don’t know that,” Leliana said.

“No? Before the Chantry blew up did Divine Justinia have plans on letting mages decide their fate?” Athena questioned.

“She had plans to get you more freedom,” Leliana was uncomfortable with this. Even she agreed that mages should be free.

“What do I do, Leliana?” Athena begged for advice, “He killed so many that were innocent, but in doing so, he set me free.”

“I don’t know, Inquisitor. But please don’t forget that instead of talking to you, he attacked you,” Leliana reminded her.

“I initially refused to talk to him.”

“That is not a reasonable excuse to attack you!” Leliana was irritated that she had to defend Athena to herself.

“He attacked Darius first. I don’t think his intention was to harm anyone, he was desperate… He still is desperate, and that’s what scares me. If there was a way to help him see past his anger, this would be a lot easier,” Athena answered as they took the stairs to the battlements.

Leliana sighed, “I understand.” 

“The old songs are loud again. Trying to heal, but not the way he should be…” Cole ran off.

“That’s an odd way to describe Anders,” Leliana watched Cole disappear.

“He’s not,” Athena sighed, knowing exactly who Cole referred to.

“Is everything all right?” Leliana was now concerned.

“No,” Athena answered as they went in to an empty tower.

“What’s going on?”

“You have to promise me two things,” Athena requested.

“What are they?” 

“No confrontations, and you cannot tell him that I know,” Athena was nervous. She knew she could trust Nightingale, but she didn’t like sharing Cullen’s hurts without his permission.

“Athena…” Leliana trailed off, not liking where this was going.

“Promise me, Leliana,” Athena ordered.

Nightingale sighed, “I promise.”

“Cullen’s taking lyrium again…” Athena almost whispered, afraid that she would be overheard.

“Why in Andraste’s name would he do such a thing?!” Leliana was not happy. “And how do you know?!”

“Lots of little things, but mostly… He smells different,” Athena blushed a little.

Leliana chuckled at her friend’s blush, “Why haven’t you said anything?”

“I was hoping that I was imagining things because…” Athena paused and looked away. Everything reminded her of the pregnancy she lost, “and then I saw a new box with lyrium draughts in it on his desk. Honestly, I’m terrified of what his reasons are for giving up.” 

“You know he doesn’t blame you for anything that’s happened?” Leliana implored. She didn’t like seeing her friend this heartbroken.

“He keeps telling me that,” Athena’s guilt haunted her violet eyes.

“But you blame yourself…” 

“How can I not? We fought a red lyrium giant, and I was most likely pregnant then. You would think if a pregnancy can survive that, it could survive anything.” Athena willed away her tears, “No matter how much I wish it, I can’t bring the baby back, and it’s something I have to accept. And now the one person I looked to for strength, has given up on himself, on me, on us…”

“You don’t know that. Cullen is probably thinking that he is saving you from more pain by doing this,” Leliana tried to encourage her, fighting back tears of her own. Athena made it quite clear she didn’t believe Nightingale, “Yes, I know it’s not the most intelligent thing he’s thought, but, he loves you. More than anything, he loves you. And no matter what foolishness he’s thinking or doing, the love you have for each other will save the both of you.”

Athena hugged her, “Thank you.”

“Talk to him,” Leliana said softly.

“I will…” Athena trailed off as they walked toward Curly’s office. As they got closer they heard yelling.

“Sounds like you’re not the only one that knows,” Leliana remarked.

Athena took a deep breath, looked ruefully at Nightingale and opened the door. Leliana chuckled and walked away. Cullen and Darius didn’t notice that Athena had entered. Darius continued to yell at Curly, “You’re a fool, Commander!”

“Have you ever tried to stop?” Cullen yelled back.

“No, but you were so close! Why give up now?!” Darius asked, exasperated. Sparkler noticed Athena, and raised an eyebrow at her. She shook her head.

“That’s not your concern!” Cullen growled.

“It may not be his, but it is mine,” Athena quietly spoke, standing as still as a statue with her hands folded in front of her.

Both Cullen and Darius looked at her, shocked. Dorian smiled, “Darius, I think it’s time we leave.”

Darius nodded, reluctantly letting go of the box of lyrium draughts and followed Dorian out. Cullen dropped in to the chair behind his desk with a defeated sigh, “Who told you?”

“You told me,” Athena perched on his desk in front of him.

“I most certainly did not,” Cullen snorted, insulted. He couldn’t be forgetting already, could he?

“Cullen, when I try to talk you out of your dreams you don’t respond anymore. You haven’t been in pain in weeks. Your scent is…. Different, and I found that,” She blushed and waved at the box that was beside her. “Why didn’t you talk to me?”

“You had to leave and when you came back…” He sighed, not wanting to continue. “You’ve had to deal with more than enough lately without me adding to what you’re going through,” Cullen had a roughness to his voice.

“Are you telling me that you aren’t hurting too? I thought it was both of us that had been attacked. I thought it was our baby that was lost,” Athena’s tears filled her eyes.

“Of course not! But how long has it been since you’ve had a decent night’s sleep? Some nights I think your dreams are worse than mine. When you cry, there’s nothing I can do to take away the pain you’re feeling. And then I find myself wishing…” Cullen paused and took her hands, “That things would go back to the way they were.”

“The way they were?” Athena waited with bated breath for his answer.

Cullen closed his eyes. When he opened them, there were tears in them, “That you were still with child…” he choked back a sob, “or that the pregnancy hadn’t happened at all.” Athena closed her eyes as tears started to spill over. Cullen immediately said, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—“

“Said what I’ve been thinking since it happened? That’s not something you need to apologize for,” Athena whispered and opened her eyes, the heartache in them still raw.

"Athena, why didn't you say anything?" Cullen came close to begging her.

“How horrible would that have sounded? I was ecstatic that I was with child, but now that I’m not anymore, I sometimes wish it had never happened. What kind of person or hopefully some day a mother, does that make me?” Athena looked down at their entwined hands and her tears dripped on them.

“A human one... One who’s heart is breaking,” Cullen spoke softly.

“You should be angry with me,” Athena was not daring to look at him.

“No, I shouldn’t. Instead of talking to each other, we let our grief get the best of us…” Cullen paused, “We used to be better at this.”

“We used to have to say and do everything with stolen moments. Our moments aren’t stolen anymore…” Athena quietly reminded him.

“No, they’re not,” Cullen pulled her close to him and kissed her.

“We’re not done talking yet,” Athena spoke as she put a little space between them.

“The lyrium?" He asked. Athena nodded. Cullen sighed, “What would you like me to do?” 

“Do you want to continue to take it?” Athena caressed his thumb with hers.

“No, but I also don’t want to pull you away from your work just to take care of me.”

“I don’t mind,” Athena tried to reassure him.

“I do,” Cullen caressed her cheek.

“In the book I’m reading it says about slowly not taking it…” Athena paused, “If a person takes it once a day, they should take it every other day for a week or two, and then every two days, and so forth. It takes longer, but there is less pain involved.”

"That sounds reasonable," Cullen said softly, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena stood and tugged on Cullen’s hand to get him to move. They went upstairs to make love.

**

The next morning, our lovers had breakfast privately, and that is when Athena brought up meeting with Anders, “Cole, Leliana, and I met with Anders yesterday.”

“Why not wait until you judged him?” Cullen was surprisingly calm.

“Because I like Skyhold and the people in it,” Athena joked and immediately regretted it. “That was wrong, I’m sorry.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “I see why Dorian and Varric lay claim to rubbing off on you.”

“You’re not upset?” Athena was kind of upset with herself for that remark (when Curly told Sparkler and I about it we laughed so hard we fell out of our chairs.)

“No, I’m not upset. I’m glad your sense of humor is returning,” Cullen was still smiling over her joke.

Athena blushed, “It was still wrong. The reason I wanted to meet him without anyone that would send him over the edge was because the judging will be public, with templars, grey wardens, and people from the chantry all present… And if one former templar and a templar can set him off…”

“I understand. What did he tell you?” Cullen inquired.

“Mostly that he was sorry. When I asked him if he truly wanted separated from at least the blight, he said that he wasn't sure…” Athena paused, “He also said that he didn’t want to hurt Hawke anymore. When I asked him what that meant he said that he didn’t know…”

“He doesn’t want to hurt her… But he doesn’t know what would hurt her?” Cullen was confused.

“It’s good to know I wasn’t the only one confused,” Athena sighed.

“Why would you think that?” 

“Cole seemed to understand what he was saying, and Leliana was… Leliana.”

Cullen chuckled, “Are you going to tell Hawke?” 

“I don’t know,” Athena stopped, seemingly in mid thought.

“Is there something else?” He asked as they walked away from the food.

“As much as I despise what Anders did, without it, I’d still be at Ostwick. Or worse,” Athena softly said.

“You don’t know that,” Cullen argued.

“It was the mage and templar war that had Divine Justinia decide on the conclave and Inquisition,” Athena paused, “how can I do anything but free him?”

“You could command him that once a way is found to separate him from his other…” Cullen paused, “entities, he use that. Or you could have him made Tranquil….”

“Tranquility… A fate worse than death,” Athena sighed.

“It may not be a favorable option, but it is an option,” Cullen said softly.

Athena walked over to a window and stared out of it for a while. Cullen stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her, “What are you thinking about?”

“That Anders knew that change needed to happen. He thought violence was the only answer. Now he’s sitting in a prison cell, waiting for another mage who has probably killed innocents to judge him,” Athena turned in his embrace with tears in her eyes to look at him. “We both wanted to save the world, to change the world… What happens when I’m judged? Or when we’re judged?”

“Athena, you… We were fighting a war, a war Anders’ actions helped start,” Cullen gently reminded her.

“That war had been building for a long time. If it hadn’t been Anders, it would have been someone else, and it could have been a lot worse. I don’t think I can do this.”

Cullen kissed her, “No more talk of Anders today.”

“What did you have in mind?” Athena asked. Cullen smiled seductively at her and they walked over to his desk (he didn’t let Athena go until he cleared off his desk,) and they made love. Right after there was a knock on the door, with Darius calling, “Commander!”

Cullen growled. Athena laughed and whispered huskily, “And you wonder why I like my quarters.”

Darius didn’t wait for an answer and opened the door. Seeing our lovers on the desk he blushed profusely, “Oh! Umm, I’m sorry,” and quickly shut the door.

Athena bit her lip to keep from laughing. Curly noticed, “Don’t you dare.”

She giggled, “At least he was the one blushing this time.”

Cullen chuckled, “I think he owes me a sparring match for this.” 

Athena laughed, “That may not be a wise idea.”

“Why not?”

“I’m pretty sure my cousin was with him.” 

Cullen closed his eyes, “Maker’s breath,” he then climbed off of the desk and Athena, “go get dressed.”

Athena laughed, “You need to get dressed too. He wasn’t calling for me.”

“I know,” Cullen sorted through the tangle of clothing. Athena got down to help him and stole his shirt. Cullen warned, “Athena….”

“You have more upstairs,” Athena slipped his shirt and her pants on.

“I shouldn’t need to considering it’s mine,” Cullen argued.

“Then I guess I’m walking through Skyhold topless,” Athena smirked, knowing Curly would never allow that.

“Why?” In answer to Curly’s question she held up her torn shirt. Curly blushed, “You can keep the shirt.”

“Good,” Athena watched him get dressed with a sultry glint in her eyes.

“I know that look and,” he stopped after he got his pants on and kissed her hard, “we’ll continue that later and in your chambers.”

“You won’t be able to fit in my clothing,” Athena teased. 

“Woman,” Curly growled playfully as he grabbed her and kissed her again, Eliciting a delighted squeal out of her.

“Oh, for the love of Andraste, would you two stop already? The doors aren’t that thick,” Sparkler loudly complained through the door.

"Your cousin needs to learn some patience,” Cullen said to Athena as he went up the ladder to get another shirt.

“I’ve tried, it doesn’t take,” Athena said, loud enough to make it through the door.

“Do not turn this on me!” Dorian exclaimed.

As Athena opened the door, she smirked, “Maybe Darius shouldn’t have walked in on us.”

“Most usually put something outside the door,” Darius was still blushing.

“Most wait for a response before barging in,” Cullen came down the ladder and wrapped his arms around Athena.

“New wardrobe choice, Athena?” Dorian raised an eyebrow at the much too big shirt she was wearing. 

“It’s comfortable,” Athena smiled up at Cullen.

“She’s been trying to steal one of my shirts for a while now,” Cullen groused, smiling down at her. 

“Stop destroying my clothes and I wouldn’t have to borrow things,” Athena teased.

Cullen sighed, blushing slightly, “Do you really have to do this in front of them?”

Athena laughed, “I love you, but you started this one.”

Cullen closed his eyes, “Don’t tell me this was a favorite shirt.”

Athena laughed more, "No, but it did survive a dragon.”

Dorian picked up the discarded and torn item of clothing, “Sweet Andraste, Commander! This shirt survived more than one dragon!” 

"There was more than one dragon?” Cullen asked, all humor gone.

“I’ve told you about them,” Athena reminded him, “Even if it had been only one dragon. The shirt still didn’t survive you.” 

Dorian was trying to hold on to the torn shirt. Athena noticed, “Dorian, I don’t think it’s going to fit you.”

“I wanted to hold on to it,” Sparkler replied.

“Why?” Athena wondered why her cousin would want a now useless piece of clothing.

“Proof,” Dorian answered.

“Proof of what?” Cullen was just as confused as Athena.

“That you’re stronger than a dragon,” Sparkler smirked.

“Andraste preserve me,” Cullen fought off a blush.

Athena laughed, “You cannot keep my clothing, Dorian… Even if they aren’t wearable anymore. And why are you two here?”

“You’re no fun, Cousin,” Dorian griped, handing her the torn shirt.

“The first thing you would do is run to Josie, and I would get yelled at for it. Just like I got yelled at for my shoes,” Athena grumbled. She still missed those shoes.

Cullen shook his head at them, “What did you need Darius?”

"Could we speak outside?" Darius nervously requested.

“Sure…” Curly followed Darius outside.

“I would not!” Dorian continued the argument with Duchess, “I’d show Varric.”

“And then you both would run to Josie,” Athena watched Cullen until he closed the door.

“You’re right, we would,” Sparkler smiled. He loved to hear his cousin laugh. “Your laughter has been far too infrequent these past weeks. It’s good to hear it again. I’m assuming you and the Commander talked?”

“We did. Why do you continue to call him the Commander?” Athena smiled as she picked up the papers that were strewn about the floor.

“Because it fits him. Are you going to tell me what you two talked about?”

“You’re using Cullen’s title as a nickname? Why do you need to know what we talked about?” Athena was suspicious of her cousin’s motives.

Sparkler stared at the desk and mumbled, “How does he get any work done?” He saw that Athena was done cleaning the mess and leaning against the desk. She waited for Dorian to answer, “Darius is still really bothered by the Commander taking lyrium again.”

“Why?” Athena was confused. She was under the impression that Darius was still taking lyrium.

“He won’t tell me,” Dorian shrugged helplessly. And then they heard yelling…. Again.

"Oh for the love of..." Dorian yanked open the door. Athena closed her eyes as Dorian pulled Darius back inside.

Cullen came in and Athena took his hand when he was near her. Cullen asked, “Why is this so important to you Darius?”

“Ana was forced to use lyrium," Arthur choked out, unable to hide his tears.

“Maker’s breath, Darius! Why didn’t you tell me?!” Dorian was irritated with his lover.

Athena gasped in horror, "She’s too young."

“Caerwin says that nothing can be done for her except to keep her on lyrium. Which means…” Darius trailed off.

“She’s at risk for possession, if she hasn’t been already,” Athena finished.

"She's already possessed and with each day it gets worse. I just found her, and I’m already losing her,” Darius’ tears spilled over.

“I need to talk to Anders,” Athena thought out loud, and then sighed, “I wish the former circle mages were still here.”

“Athena?” Cullen wondered what Duchess was thinking.

"Without enough mages, Anders is the only one with experience in this. He invited a spirit in, and I don’t fully understand how… Maybe we can “invite” the spirit out of Ana and send it back to the Fade,” Athena explained her hastily put together plan.

“How?” Sparkler inquired.

"With the anchor," Athena looked at her glowing left hand.

“Are you sure about this?” Cullen was worried that Athena was once again placing herself in danger.

“We have to try,” Athena stared into Cullen’s eyes before continuing. “Take Ana to my chambers. Get Caerwin, and as many Templars that will fit in to my room.”

“Why Templars?” Dorian sought to understand Duchess’ plan.

“If we can draw this thing out, they can weaken it so I don’t have to use much of the anchor’s power to send it back,” Athena explained.

“Thank you,” Darius rushed out to get Ana.

“I’ll get Caerwin,” Dorian left, leaving Athena and Cullen alone.

"If Anders is able to help….” 

“Am I going to free him?” Athena asked. Cullen nodded, “Probably. Even without this, I don’t think I had any other choice.”

Cullen kissed her, “If you’re not in your chambers in an hour, I’m coming after you.”

Athena chuckled, and mock saluted him, “Yes, Commander!”

Our lovers went their separate ways. Athena ran in to Hawke first, “What do you intend to do with Anders?”

“At the moment, I need his help,” Athena answered, not stopping.

“For what?” Hawke walked along side of her. 

“A little girl was forced to use lyrium far too young. She's been possessed, and I need to know how Anders invited Justice in. I’m hoping we can invite whatever is in the little girl out. Then I should be able to send it back to the Fade,” Athena explained.

“What do you need me to do?” Hawke offered.

“Convince him to help,” Athena opened the dungeon door. Hawke and Athena took off at a run to get to Anders. Once Blondie’s cell was reached, Athena quickly explained, “Anders, there’s a little girl who was forced by her mother to use lyrium far too young. She is now possessed by a spirit. How did you invite Justice in?”

"Simple really, I said an incantation that told him I would be a willing host,” Anders stood.

“What was the incantation?” Hawke asked.

“Let me help, please?” Anders almost begged as he gripped the bars to his cell.

“You can’t repeat it,” Athena was disappointed and it showed.

“I can’t, but if it means saving a child from torment…” Blondie trailed off, ready and willing to help. Hawke closed her green eyes against the tears.

“Thank you Anders, but I cannot ask you to take on another spirit if my plan fails,” Athena refused his offer.

“You’re not asking. You and I are both healers, and we would do anything to heal another if it was within our power,” Anders quietly responded.

“There’s going to be Templars there. They need to weaken the demon so I can send it back without using much of the anchor. I cannot have you attacking them,” Athena warned him.

Anders understood, “I will do everything in my power to stop Vengeance from coming out.”

“Thank you,” Athena replied as the dungeon keeper unlocked Anders’ cell and chains. Cullen met them outside the dungeon. Athena was shocked, “It hasn’t been an hour yet.”

Cullen half smiled, already mentally preparing for battle, “I thought it would be best if we do this outside of Skyhold instead of in your quarters.”

“Where are they?” Athena knew that time was of the essence.

“One of the scouts found a cave where the veil was thin. We thought that might be the best place for this to happen,” Cullen took hold of Athena’s hand and noticed Anders and Hawke behind Athena, “Can he help?”

“I’m not sure if any of this will work, but we have to try,” Athena glanced in the same direction as Curly.

“We will do everything we can, Commander,” Hawke said for both of them.

“Commander, I am sorry for attacking you,” Anders quietly offered.

Cullen stiffly nodded in acknowledgement of hearing him as they walked to the gates to get their horses. He wasn’t going to say anything, but he needed to know, “What I don’t understand is why you thought it was necessary to kill innocent people. Then you came to the Inquisition asking for help, and attacked those you were asking for help from.”

“Unfortunately Vengeance is only growing stronger in me. There are times where I don’t seem to exist anymore,” Anders explained.

“Wouldn’t that be more reason to find a way to get him out of you?” Cullen snapped at him, not buying it.

“And how much of me would be lost?” Anders inquired.

“There’s no way of knowing that,” Hawke defended her love.

"So, if Athena’s plan works for Ana, you wouldn’t even consider attempting it?” Cullen almost snorted in derision, but didn’t want to ruin their only chance at saving Ana.

“Ana is the little girl?” Hawke asked. Athena nodded as she got on her horse.

“What Ana is going through is different. She was forced in to this… I wasn’t. Vengeance and Justice aren’t new to me,” Anders answered Cullen.

“Are you afraid that you would be less of a mage without them?” Athena wondered why anyone would be willing to hold on to dangerous spirits.

“Why would you ask that?” Hawke was confused by her question.

“The same reason Mages use lyrium and blood magic. They are tools to make our abilities more powerful and it leads us down a path where people are terrified of us.”

“You don’t use lyrium?” Anders was amazed to meet a Mage that didn’t need lyrium.

“No. I don’t think any mage needs to. Our powers don’t manifest themselves through lyrium, they just… appear at a certain age. Anyone that would give a child lyrium does not deserve to be a parent,” Athena was getting upset.

“How are you able to do everything you do then?” Hawke investigated.

“Because I like to read and I’ve had some really interesting teachers. Before the anchor, my powers weren’t anything that special.” (Duchess, you can stop being humble anytime now.)

Cullen shook his head, “That’s not what the Knight-Commander or First Enchanter thought.”

“I thought you didn’t read all of her journal?” Athena asked him.

“I didn’t, she said your abilities were special on almost every page I read,” Cullen responded. Athena shrugged, looking far off in to her memories and letting what ifs enter. Curly, of course, noticed, and brought her back to the present, “Inquisitor, don’t.” And with the next breath, “We’re here.”

Everyone dismounted and walked in to the cave. On seeing Anders the Templars started to draw their swords, Cullen stayed them with a movement of his hand. Athena walked over to Ana and knelt down beside her, whispering, “Hi Ana.”

Ana's frightened eyes met Duchess’, she whispered, “Help me.”

“We will do everything we can,” Athena squeezed her hand and briefly left Ana’s side to explain the plan of attack, “I’m going to see if I can get the spirit to talk to me. If I can, Anders, that’s where you come in. If we are able to get the spirit out of Ana, the templars will need to hold it and weaken it until I can get that rift to open.” She motioned to the green swirling thing at the back of the cave, “Demons will come out of it when it’s opened. We’ll have to defeat them and send the spirit back at the same time.”

When Athena went back to Ana’s side, the spirit was already making it’s presence known, “How does a father wait ten years to see his daughter? She was so lonely… It’s a good thing I was there,” Ana’s head turned with blazing eyes to look at Athena, “The Inquisitor! How kind of you to join us! The anchor took your baby, and so long as it is a part of you, you won’t get to have children! It will kill you! Sooner rather than later!” The spirit cackled.

“Anders, now!” Athena yelled. Anders said his incantation, pulling the spirit out of Ana. Once the spirit was completely out of Ana, the Templars did their thing. Athena opened the rift, and fought alongside Hawke, Anders, Dorian, and Cullen. Once the demons were defeated the spirit got sent back to the Fade too, and the rift was sealed. 

Ana was sleeping peacefully, holding her father’s hand, who looked up, “Thank you, Inquisitor.”

Athena smiled at him and left before anyone could see her tears. Cullen followed her. Once they were out of the cave, he said softly, “Athena.”

She turned to him with tears streaming down her face. He crushed her to him and hoarsely told her, “You can’t believe what that thing said. It was trying to hurt you so it could keep Ana.”

Athena closed her eyes as a sigh shuddered through her, “I know, but it’s still hard to hear my darkest thoughts out loud.”

“If the anchor could do that, I doubt that you would be able to write,” Cullen smiled a little, pulling her with him to sit on a rock, “Or that we could hold hands.” To prove his point he lifted up their entwined hands for her to see. Athena kissed him in thanks. 

“Inquisitor?” Hawke asked. 

“Yes, Hawke?” Athena asked with her and Curly’s foreheads touching.

“What would you like us to do?” Hawke inquired, nervously.

Athena looked away from Cullen to look at Hawke and Anders, “You can come back to Skyhold, and I can pardon Anders publicly. Or you can leave now, and I will inform Kirkwall of my decision.”

“Thank you,” Hawke was relieved and looked at Anders, “I think it’s in the best interest of everyone if we left now. Can you tell Varric that I’m sorry?”

“I will,” Athena promised.

“Varric isn’t going to be upset with you?” Hawke asked.

“Hawke, you know the answer to that,” Athena smiled.

Hawke chuckled, “True.”

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Anders was amazed that he was being let go, again.

“I may not know you as well as Hawke does, but Vengeance wasn’t the one that helped tonight, Anders did. I would have liked to get to know you without Vengeance interfering. If you ever decide to see if you can be just Anders again, I’d be willing to help,” Athena offered softly.

Anders and Hawke nodded their thanks and went on their way. Cullen chuckled, “It’s a good thing Varric wasn’t here.” 

“Why?”

“Because you just invited Anders back in to your life.”

Athena shrugged, “He knows I’m too forgiving for my own good. He also knows that I would attempt to help almost anyone.”

“I’m glad you thought otherwise about Corypheus,” Sparkler came out of the cave.

“Anders never tore a hole in the sky and he doesn’t strike me as one who wants to challenge the Maker so… I think we’re good,” Athena responded.

Darius laid a still sleeping Ana on the wagon they brought with them and climbed in beside her. Dorian asked hopefully, “To Skyhold?”

Athena nodded looking up at Cullen. Curly smiled wickedly as he helped her on her horse, “You and I have some unfinished business to attend to.”

“Do we?” Athena asked as Curly got on his horse.

He rode over to her and kissed her, “You’re still in my shirt.”

“You said I could keep it!” Duchess called after him, getting her horse to a gallop to catch up with Curly. When she caught up to him, she teased, “If you like your clothing so much… Stop destroying mine.” And she galloped off.

“Would you two get a room!” Sparkler called after them.

“That’s the plan!” Cullen shouted back.

“Cullen!” Sparkler couldn’t help but laugh because he could hear Athena’s blush in that one word.

Once they reached Skyhold, they were accosted by myself and Ruffles. I got to go first, “Where’s Hawke?”

“Hawke and Anders are free. Hawke thought it was best that they didn’t return. She wanted me to tell you that she was sorry. I’m sure you’ll see her again,” Duchess informed me.

“We never could stay angry at each other for long,” I smiled.

“Athena almost invited them to our wedding,” Curly teased.

“I did not!”

“You offered to help him, didn’t you?” I asked, not really surprised.

“I did,” Athena blushed.

“Duchess…” I started to warn her. Thinking on it, I shook my head and chuckled, “Why am I not surprised.”

“You’re not upset?” Athena was surprised that I wasn’t berating her.

“I should be, you’re too forgiving and nice for your own good,” I paused, “but that’s one of the things I like about you.” 

“You got him to blush,” Curly smirked.

Athena shook her head at him, “Leave Varric alone.”

“She’s good at that. Curly, you and me are playing a hand of Wicked Grace tomorrow night,” I ordered.

“No, he’s not. Tomorrow we leave for the Winter Palace renovation ball,” Ruffles reminded everyone as she stood beside Athena.

“We do?” Athena had completely forgotten about it with all that had happened.

“Yes, unless you don’t want to go…” Josephine trailed off.

Athena sat down and sighed, “I don’t know, Josie. So much has happened…”

“It’s all right, I can send a polite refusal stating that the Inquisition needs your full attention right now,” Ruffles offered.

“Athena, are you sure you don’t want to go?” Cullen sat beside her.

Athena shook her head, “No, but….”

“Then we’re going,” Cullen smiled. 

“Are you sure?” Athena seemed very doubtful.

Curly kissed her, “Yes.”

“Josie, you seemed very quick with the refusal…” Leliana investigated.

“My mother is going to be there,” Ruffles grumbled.

“Bring Bull with you,” Athena suggested.

“He won’t take no for an answer,” Josephine sighed in exasperation. Everyone chuckled. Ruffles changed the subject, blushing, “Why are you wearing one of Cullen’s shirts?!”

Athena looked at Nightingale as Ruffles launched in to the venting of her frustration, “That shirt was hand made in Val Royeaux with specific measurements from the Commander. Where is your shirt? That one was specially made to stand up to dragons!”

Athena laughed until she couldn’t breathe as Cullen blushed profusely. Chuckling, I interrupted the tirade, “Ruffles, I think you found your culprit.”

“Is the shirt better or worse off than the shoes?” Leliana inquired, after the laughter had died down.

Athena gasped out, wiping tears from her eyes, “Worse.”

Leliana whispered to Athena, “Where is it?”

“Cullen’s office,” she whispered back.

Leliana smiled, “I can’t wait to see it.”

Athena chuckled, “I want to hear more of how you” she stopped to look at Cullen, “were willing to get measured.”

“I used the measurements I had from the engagement party attire,” Ruffles explained haughtily, “I still don’t understand how a shirt and a pair of shoes that are made to stand up to dragons can be destroyed by the Commander.” 

“Are you telling me that you and Bull never…?” Athena was very suspicious.

“Bull is a perfect gentleman,” Ruffles sniffed.

I chuckled, “Right, and that’s why you were walking through the hall wearing one of Krem’s shirts this morning.”

Josephine sighed and blushed, “Unlike Athena, I do not need to have my clothes specially made.”

“Why do you have my clothes specially made?” Athena was lost with that statement.

“When we were at Haven one of the servants brought me a shredded shift of yours, there was blood on it. The servant also told me that there had been welts on your back from just simply wearing and walking around in your armor. That was when you started receiving clothing that was specially made,” Josephine explained.

“Thank you, Josie,” Athena hugged her friend.

“Now can I have my shirt back?” Cullen had finally recovered from blushing.

“No!” Athena refused to undress in front of everyone.

“I meant,” Curly blushed, “once we got to your quarters.”

“You said I could keep it,” Athena playfully pouted.

I laughed, “Curly just let her have the shirt. It looks better on her anyway.”

Cullen smiled at Athena, “True. I guess we have to pack tonight…”

Athena blushed, knowing what he was thinking. Ruffles looked at them, “Already done. I wasn’t sure when you would be able to get back.”

“Thank you,” Cullen said quietly. 

“The party is still a week away?” Something about this didn’t make sense to Duchess.

“Yes, why?” Leliana asked.

“It doesn’t take a week to get to Halamshiral.”

“The Empress wants us to get there a day or two early. With the coach, it’s going to slow us down,” Ruffles explained.

“Coach?” Curly’s turn to be confused.

“For you and Athena,” Josephine uncomfortably answered.

“Why?” Both Cullen and Athena asked.

Ruffles looked at them, blushing, “I had it made when Athena was still…”

“It’s all right, Josie,” Athena encouraged Josephine to go on.

“With child… And it seems like it would be a shame to not use it,” she finished in a rush.

"You are the Inquisitor. You should arrive in style," Leliana smiled.

Athena chuckled as Cullen groaned, “I’m not the one that needs convincing. I think arriving in a carriage would be fun.”

"Maker's breath," Curly swore which had us all chuckling, “Is it something we have to ride in the entire way?”

“Trying to find any way you can to get out of this, aren’t you?” I laughed.

“Shut up, dwarf,” Curly grumped.

“Cullen, if you don’t want to, we don’t have to use it,” Athena offered.

"The carriage does provide some privacy..." Nightingale trailed off.

“That’s what I keep telling myself about Cullen’s office,” Athena teased.

“Woman,” Curly growled in warning. Athena laughed.

“Sparkler?” I asked chuckling. Athena shook her head. I had to think for a minute, “Darius?”

"He walked in on you two?” Leliana couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“He entered without waiting for a ‘by your leave’….” Athena chuckled as Curly’s blush got brighter.

“And saw…?” I wondered what exactly it was that had Curly blushing so much.

"You would have to ask Darius,” Athena winked at me.

“Duchess, you know I will,” I warned.

“I know,” Athena smirked.

Curly shook his head, “Of all the things you could have told them tonight, you had to tell them that.”

“It’s more Darius’ embarrassment than yours, love. He should have waited.” Athena kissed him and whispered, “I do love it when you blush.”

“I still need an answer on carriage,” Ruffles quietly reminded them before Curly could respond.

“We’ll do it.” Cullen grumbled, “The soldiers will never let me live this down.”

Athena kissed him, and said huskily, “I’ll make it up to you.” 

“Yes, you will,” Cullen stood. He pulled Athena out of her seat and whispered in her ear, “You’re going to start tonight.”

"Just don't rip your shirt," Athena teased. 

Cullen lifted her in his arms and carried her through the door and up the stairs. Athena stopped him half way up by kissing him. Cullen groaned, dropped her legs and quickly stripped down to nothing. While Cullen was undressing, Athena whipped off the shirt she was wearing and started to struggle with her pants. Cullen helped by ripping them off, which elicited a husky chuckle from Athena, “Josie’s going to kill you.”

“I don’t care,” He backed Athena up against the wall and wrapped his arms around her waist. When he lifted her, she wrapped her legs around his waist and kissed him hard and passionately. Their passion built to a crescendo of fireworks on the stair well.


	34. Chapter 34

The day greeted Athena dressed in mauve and cleaning up the stairs when Cullen started calling out in his sleep. Athena went to him and as always whispered in his ear. When he had stilled, she couldn’t resist teasing him, “If you keep ripping my clothing, I’m going to need a new wardrobe.”

Cullen opened his eyes, “It just gives you three an excuse to go shopping.”

“If Leliana and I could figure out a way to get Josie away from Bull or the Chargers for more than an hour, that would be a great idea,” Athena got off the bed to finish cleaning the stairs.

“I don’t see the issue,” Cullen followed her after he got dressed.

“Leliana says Bull is worse than you were when I was traveling.” Athena picked up the pieces of her shredded clothing, “I never liked these pants.”

“I was not that bad,” Cullen groused, “if you didn’t like them why did you wear them?”

Athena smiled, “Every time I wore them you would look at me like you wanted to rip them off.”

Cullen took the pieces that Athena had collected and kissed her, “It doesn’t take clothing for me to want to do that.”

Athena teased, “Good. Because I’m running out of clothing.”

“Stop wearing clothes that I have to rip off of you,” he teased, backing her against the wall.

“We don’t have time for this,” Athena reminded him.

“Then taking the carriage wasn’t such a bad idea after all,” Cullen said seductively after he kissed her.

“Cullen!” Athena blushed. 

Curly had a very smug smile when Ruffles burst through the door, “Not the pants too!”

“They were too tight anyway,” Athena informed her.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Josephine asked.

“I had my reasons,” Athena smiled at Cullen.

They heard Bull bellow, “Josephine!”

“I wish he would stop doing that,” Ruffles sighed in frustration.

“Why is Bull yelling for you?” Athena found the bellowing unlike Bull, unless he was fighting a dragon, or drinking, or laughing. On second thought, it was exactly like Bull.

“He was challenged to a duel in Val Royeaux. He won, but ever since then, he won’t leave me out of his, or the Chargers’ sights for long,” Josephine explained.

“I guess we shouldn’t keep him… Them waiting then,” Cullen smirked. Once they were in the main hall, Curly said to Athena, “I’ll meet you at the gates.”

Athena laughed as Tiny followed Cullen out without saying a word to Ruffles. Much to Josephine’s mortification, “That is not funny.”

“Does Bull’s nervousness remind you of something… Or someone?” Leliana asked as the ladies started to walk to the gate.

“Yes, it does,” Athena smiled.

“What are you two talking about?” Ruffles was getting decidedly ruffled.

“Cullen was very nervous right before he proposed,” Athena saw that Bull had caught up with our esteemed Commander.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Bull asked.

“Now?” Cullen finished checking in with the soldiers.

“When you proposed to the Boss… What made you decide that the time was right?” Tiny blushed! He actually blushed! I didn’t think there was a topic that would make Tiny blush!

Cullen chuckled, “I didn’t. If I had waited until I thought the time was right, or for things to calm down, I would still be waiting.”

“But she’s wearing your mother’s ring,” Bull was confused.

“I thought of asking her more times than I can count. When her father came to Skyhold, I asked his permission, and later that night I asked her. I thought you weren’t going to ask?”

“Kadan is so excited to be planning yours…” Bull was blushing again. (I’m going to have to start placing bets on this, no one’ll believe me.)

“Follow your heart, Bull. Josephine will love what ever you decide to do,” Athena stood beside Cullen and took hold of his hand.

“Now who’s listening in on conversations they shouldn’t be?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“You’ve done it to me enough times,” Athena smiled, unrepentant. 

Cullen kissed her and as they got in to the carriage there were a lot of yells and teasing from the soldiers. Curly was blushing profusely by the time he sat down. Athena kissed him, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen sighed, dreading Athena’s reaction to what he had to tell her, “Darius stayed behind with Ana.”

“You’ll be doing the night watches. Are they going to be short shifts?” Athena was worried for him since he was pulling himself off of lyrium, again. 

“Every three hours a change will happen. I’ll be taking the second watch,” Cullen responded.

“Did you bring lyrium with you?” Athena hesitatingly asked.

“I didn’t have a chance to grab it.”

“If you are in pain, even if it’s just a head ache, will you let me help you?” Athena implored.

“I will do my best,” Cullen put his arm around her. Ever since South Reach her hair always smelled like heather, and he loved it.

“Promise me, please?” Athena was almost begging him.

“I’ll be fine. I haven’t taken lyrium since we talked about it, and I don’t want to,” Cullen reassured her.

“That was all of two days ago… And you weren’t doing night watches,” Athena argued.

“Athena…” Curly was really trying to not get frustrated.

“Cullen, if you don’t promise me, I will be a constant shadow to you. Josie and Leliana thought you and Bull were bad…” Athena threatened (anytime Duchess threatened something, it always meant that she was ready and willing to do it.)

Cullen closed his eyes and sighed, “I promise, but not for only a head ache. Do you really think we’re going to be separated all that much in Halamshiral?” 

"I hope not. But there is absolutely no telling with politics. I’m a little worried as to why we’re arriving early,” Athena felt uneasy.

“We’ll find out once we get there,” Cullen smirked as he decided to change the subject. He kissed her, “I believe there was a specific reason for the carriage…”

“Was there? I thought it was because you wanted to give the soldiers something to gossip over,” Athena laid back on the seat.

Cullen growled as he kissed her again, “I should rip that dress you’re wearing.”

“Would that mean I get another of your shirts?” Athena’s voice was sultry as she pulled Curly’s shirt out of his pants.

"No," Cullen whispered against the base of her neck, lightly kissing her there…. It was a good thing the blinds were drawn, and that the horses and wheels are loud.

**

The trip went surprisingly well until the last night. When we broke for camp, Cullen had a meeting with the soldiers and Athena was having a meeting with Leliana and Josephine when shouting could be heard from each side of the camp. The ladies and I were in the center. Leliana sighed, “We were so close.” 

Ruffles went to talk to Tiny and Duchess went to see what the soldiers were shouting about. As Athena’s made her way through the crowd she almost got hit, and a mumbled, “Sorry, Inquisitor.”

“It’s all right, Johan. What’s going on?” Athena asked as they made their way to the front of the crowd.

“The Commander asked a new recruit to take over his watch tonight.” Johan stopped mid thought. 

“And?” Athena craned her neck to look around the others as she searched for Cullen.

“The new recruit said yes and then changed his mind after the Commander left, which had the Captain yelling at the new recruit,” Johan explained.

“Did the Commander say where he was going?” Athena inquired.

“No.”

“What are they yelling about now?” Athena was only half listening as she wondered where Curly was.

“The Commander didn’t look well when he left. They want to send someone to find him and check on him,” Johan replied.

“I’m going to check our tent, let’s hold off on the search party until then, shall we?” Athena was loud enough to be heard by the Captain. Now, she was really worried.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” the captain nodded in agreement. 

“Johan, come with me, please?” Athena requested.

“Certainly, Inquisitor,” Johan smiled, pleased to be going on a walk with the pretty and kind Herald.

They made it back to the tent. Johan waited outside while Athena went in… And she almost kicked Cullen. She quickly left to tell Johan, “Commander Cullen is in his tent and it was just a head ache, there’s no need for a search party. If they need someone to take over the Commander’s watch, I will.”

“You most certainly will not,” Nightingale said, “I will.”

“I’ll let the Captain know,” Johan rushed off (he’s only a little frightened of Nightingale.)

“I need your help,” Athena quickly pulled Leliana in to the tent with her.

“Maker!” Leliana almost kicked Cullen.

“Help me get him up?” Athena begged. She was already putting a limp arm over her shoulders. Leliana did the same.   
Once they had him on a cot, Leliana asked, “What happened?”

“You remember how I said he was taking lyrium again?” Leliana nodded. As Athena talked she warmed up her magic, “He’s not anymore. My guess is that the pain became too much.”

“You told him what you found in the book?”

“I did, but he didn’t bring lyrium with him…” Athena trailed off as she tried to figure out the best way to help Curly.

“I can find some and we can keep it as a last resort,” Leliana offered.

“Thank you.” Duchess placed glowing fingers at Cullen’s temples and started to heal him.

“Athena, are you going to be able to heal him?”

“Yes,” Athena pulled the physical pain of withdrawal from her love. 

“Are you going to hurt yourself doing it?” Nightingale worried. She stood in front of the tent flap so no one could get in.

“Possibly?” Athena questioned to no one in particular. “He’s unconscious, what choice do I have?”

“None,” Leliana quietly spoke. 

It took Athena a while to get Cullen from passed out to just sleeping. When she finished she winced rubbing her hands together.

Leliana asked, “If you did a release now, would that take away what you’re feeling?”

“I don’t know,” Athena whispered, trying not to show that her entire body was racked with pain.

“I’ll stay here. Why don’t you sneak out of the back of the tent and try?” Leliana suggested. 

Athena followed her suggestion and heard the soldiers comment on how the stars had become a little brighter for a few minutes. When Athena came back in Leliana asked, “Did it work?”

“It helped. Thank you,” Athena whispered, not wanting to disturb Cullen. 

Leliana smiled and left while Athena paced and waited for Cullen to wake. When he did he found a sleeping Athena beside him… On the ground. As he was moving to get off the cot she woke up, “Cullen?”

“You don’t have to sleep on the ground,” he whispered. He felt like there was a hammer pounding on the inside of his head. 

“It wasn’t intentional. Are you still in pain?” Athena whispered. Cullen nodded and winced, this time, she didn’t ask, and took the rest of his pain away. When she was certain he was feeling better, she said, “I found you in here unconscious.”

Cullen closed his eyes in guilt, “I’m sorry.”

“Johan said that you had looked unwell when you left the meeting?” Athena sat beside her love on the cot.

“Why were you talking to Johan?” Cullen was confused as to why she wouldn’t come directly to him if there were issues with the soldiers.

"You didn't hear them arguing?" 

“No. I…” Cullen paused and blushed, feeling embarrassed. He was a soldier and at one time a Templar, he should be stronger than this, “I could barely see straight walking back to the tent.” 

“Cullen-” Athena started, ramping up to berate her love.

“You spent most of the day with me, did I seem like I was in pain?” He interrupted as he took hold of her hands.

“No,” Athena closed her eyes, fighting tears.

“This is what you were worried about? That the withdrawal is going to be worse?” Cullen asked quietly.

Athena opened her eyes and whispered, “Yes. I was hoping that because it was only a few weeks…”

“That things would at least be the same?” Cullen half smiled in understanding.

“Yes,” she blushed slightly. Athena knew it had been foolish to hope.

“Lady Inquisitor,” A male voice said from outside of the tent. Athena let go of Cullen’s hands to go talk to the voice.

“What do you need, Johan?” Athena asked.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where Sister Leliana is?” Johan blushed.

Athena chuckled, “They couldn’t find anyone for the second watch?” He shook his head. “Have you tried her tent?”

Johan blushed more, “I don’t know which one it is…”

“You walked in on someone didn’t you?” Athena gently inquired.

“Yes, the qunari,” Johan turned red.

“I’ll let her know,” Athena chuckled again.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Johan rushed off.

Athena was laughing softly when Cullen joined her, “I thought the second watch had already been decided.”

“The new recruit you asked changed his mind after you left,” Athena took hold of his hand and walked toward Nightingale’s tent.

“I’m guessing that you offered and Leliana countered that offer?” Cullen questioned, but it was more like a statement… He knew Duchess too well.

“Yes, if Johan didn’t have a crush on Leliana I probably wouldn’t have even known that they still needed someone.”

“He told me that he’s terrified of her,” Curly said as Athena stood by Nightingale’s tent flap.

“That too,” Athena said, “Leliana?”

“Athena!” Could be heard coming from inside, and it almost sounded as though Nightingale had growled.

“Before you yell at me, all I did was rescue a sweet young man from going in to Varric’s tent by mistake. It’s bad enough the poor thing already saw Bull,” Athena replied.

“Oh,” was all that was heard.

“I know it’s been a while since I defeated Corypheus, but I have a reasonable knowledge on how to defend myself and those around me,” Athena complained.

“You are also a huge target because you’re the Inquisitor,” Cullen argued, raring for a fight, feeling very protective over Duchess.

“And you’re the only one that can close rifts,” Leliana added, coming outside of the tent.

“The former left hand of the Divine and Commander of the Inquisition forces aren’t targets as well?” Athena challenged as the trio went to relieve the person currently on watch.

“When you are traveling with soldiers, their job is to protect you,” Cullen maintained.

“I can’t do what you and Leliana do, and I don’t want to. So why is it that you two think you’re allowed to not have someone watch your back as well?” Athena reasoned.

“What did you do, Athena?” Leliana asked as realization dawned on Curly as to why I had been talking to him the past couple nights. Needless to say, he was not happy.

“Varric…” Cullen growled.

Athena smiled triumphantly and sat down with her back to the camp. After Leliana stopped laughing, she asked, “You actually had Varric play bodyguard for the Commander?”

“I didn’t have to ask,” Athena said, “he offered and I accepted.”

“Why did he offer?” Nightingale inquired as they watched Curly pace.

“He knew I wasn’t going to let Cullen do the night watches alone. Just like I’m not going to let you do this one alone,” Athena told her.

“I can take care of myself,” Leliana sounded a bit offended.

“So can I,” Athena challenged. “You need to stop terrifying Johan. He has the biggest crush on you.”

“I do not terrify him. Every time I look at him, he blushes and runs away,” Leliana griped.

Athena laughed, until she heard Cullen say “I’m going to kill that dwarf.”

“No you’re not.” Athena went on to remind him of how valuable I am, “He has watched my back since I met him. You have even asked him to do so, on more than one occasion. Varric also agrees with me that having two or more people, especially when they have certain titles and abilities, would be better able to protect those around them.”

"And they’re also able to keep each other awake,” Leliana teased.

Athena laughed as Curly growled, and questioned Nightingale, “Has Josie never slept in a tent before?”

“She slept in one in the Arbor Wilds. I’m not sure what the issue is now…” Leliana answered. They watched one of the Chargers sneak around, poking holes in the tents.

“I think we have our answer,” Athena chuckled softly as Curly sat beside her.

“I understand why the requisition officer would always say that my scouts were damaging the tents," Leliana replied as they watched the not so sneaky ones go back to their tent.

“That or Dorian and Sera would set them on fire,” Athena smiled at the memories.

“And you broke the cots?” Leliana queried.

“It was only one, and I stopped trying after that,” Athena blushed.

"When did this happen?" Cullen asked.

“The first night in the Hinterlands,” Athena’s cheeks became quite rosy.

“And?” Leliana encouraged.

“And what? I set the infernal thing up and while I was sleeping it closed on me. I panicked and used magic on it.” Athena groused, “Now you have all the reasons I prefer the ground and blankets.”

“What about the one on the way to South Reach?” Leliana questioned.

Athena looked at Cullen, “I’m not taking the blame for that one.”

“We both broke it,” Cullen was unwilling to solely accept the blame.

“You set it up,” Athena raised an auburn eyebrow at him.

Leliana laughed. All of a sudden they heard a loud roar. Curly went for his sword. Leliana went for her bow and arrows. Athena laughed, “Good to know Bull and Josephine are still awake.”

“That was Bull?” Leliana asked. Athena nodded. 

Leliana was astounded, “How did you survive?”

“You can’t tell me that things didn’t get out of hand when you traveled with the royalty of Fereldan and Morrigan. Plus… I think the ruckus scared off things,” Athena looked in the direction of Tiny’s and Ruffles’ tent with a mischievous glint lighting her violet eyes.

“What are you thinking?” Leliana noticed Athena’s devilry.

“Bull used to throw little things at or in my tent. I guess it was his version of a night watch to make sure I was still there…” Athena trailed off.

“And you want to throw something in his tent?” Cullen guessed.

“Sort of,” Athena disappeared into her tent and came out holding a shredded item of clothing.

“Commander!” Leliana exclaimed.

“It’s not Athena’s!” Curly blushed.

Athena chuckled, “At one time, it belonged to Bull.”

“What was it?” Cullen asked.

“I don’t know. One of your,” Athena looked pointedly at Cullen, “soldiers thought it was mine and gave it to me.”

“Are you saying it was destroyed recently?” Leliana smiled wickedly.

Athena shrugged, “I’m going to return it.”

Cullen and Leliana watched Athena walk away. Leliana inquired, “You’re feeling better?” 

"I am.”

“Why were you unconscious?” 

"I don't know. I felt fine until the meeting started. As I left it felt as though my head was being crushed,” Cullen said quietly.

“Have you ever felt that way before?” 

“Never,” Cullen watched Athena peek into the tent, “she’s not…”

“I thought she was going to throw it in?” Leliana inquired.

“I thought that as well, but no, she went right in,” Cullen wondered at Duchess’s motives.

“She’s getting revenge for all the times Josie interrupted you two,” Leliana stated chuckling.

“She didn’t interrupt all that often,” Cullen remarked softly.

“Only almost every meal. If Bull hadn’t become a hobby, Josie was planning on sending snacks as well,” Leliana thought she was giving him something to use against her friend. 

Cullen laughed, “She succeeded in that too.”

“I take it Athena wasn’t pleased?” 

“They were chocolate chip cookies, she didn’t complain too much,” Cullen murmured. He remembered all too well the reason there were cookies everywhere.

And then they heard Ruffles shout, “Athena, get out!”

Athena ran out laughing. Breathless, she returned to Curly and Nightingale. Cullen chuckled, “I’m surprised Bull didn’t say anything.”

“He was asleep. A herd of wild horses wouldn’t be able to wake him right now,” Athena sat down beside Curly.

“What did you do to him?” Leliana questioned.

“I didn’t do anything. Bull is a very sound sleeper.”

“Did you get your revenge?” Cullen put his arm around her.

“I did,” she smiled triumphantly.

“Did you find out what that thing used to be?” Leliana was dying of curiosity.

“No...” Athena chuckled, “but Josie was the one to ruin it.”

Leliana laughed, “This is too good. Why did Josie yell at you?”

“They broke the cot and some other things. I couldn’t resist teasing her.” Athena looked up at the stars, “Maybe there is something to these night watches after all.”

Cullen laughed, “They’re not supposed to be fun.”

“Maybe they should be.”

“I’ll think about it,” Cullen stood.

“Where are you going?” Athena asked.

“To get some revenge of my own,” Cullen grabbed a bucket.

“Oh no,” Athena laughed.

“Who is he dumping water on?” 

“At least Johan,” Athena chuckled.

They watched Curly until they couldn’t see him anymore. They heard Johan and the new recruit yell, which had the ladies chuckling. Johan and the new recruit came over dripping wet, and mumbled, “We’ll take over the night watch now.”

Leliana and Athena waited for Cullen to return. When he didn’t they looked at each other. Athena said, “What’s taking him so…” She didn’t get to finish because they heard me yell. Athena chuckled, “Varric will not leave Skyhold until Cullen is naked because of Wicked Grace again.”

Leliana laughed, “The next game I’m going to be playing.”

“I think I’ll sit that one out.”

“You’re a wise woman, Athena,” Nightingale grinned and went in to her tent.

Athena laughed at Cullen’s smug expression, “Feeling better now?”

Curly’s smile got wider, “I am.”

“Maybe I should sleep in the carriage so Varric can’t find me first thing in the morning,” Athena teased.

Cullen pulled her close and kissed her, “I’ll protect you.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Athena murmured. Cullen laughed.

The sun was a rosy pink as it dawned over the tents and carriages. I waited until breakfast to talk to our lovers, “When we get back to Skyhold, Curly, we’re playing Wicked Grace, and I am going to enjoy every minute of your losing.”

“That’s if I lose,” Cullen replied with confidence.

“Have you two been playing?” I was very confused at Curly’s bravado.

Athena shook her head, “Every time I ask he finds ways to say no.” 

Cullen shrugged, “Stop distracting me during chess and maybe we’ll play a hand.”

“Are you complaining, Commander?” Leliana joined us for breakfast.

Cullen kissed Athena and smiled, “Never.”

“Duchess I thought me keeping Curly awake was our little secret?” I whined.

“You can blame the new recruit that changed his mind about covering the over night watch. I could have had Cullen all to myself last night,” Athena explained.

“I’m assuming he was doused with water too?” I questioned.

“He was,” Curly smirked, proud of himself.

**

We got on the road after breakfast. As we drew closer to the Winter Palace, the barren landscape slowly changed to one of lush greenness.

Before our lovers got out of the carriage, Cullen teased, “Let’s turn around and go back to Skyhold.”

“I was ready to take Josephine up on her refusal… This was your idea,” Athena kissed him, and the carriage door opened.

“Inquisitor and Commander, we welcome you to the Winter Palace,” the footman bowed them out of the carriage. 

“Thank you,” Athena walked past the footman and through the gates. As they were walking through the front garden holding hands, they heard gasps of “It is true!” And “a Templar and a mage?” And the best one “but I wanted to marry the Commander, mama!” Athena couldn’t stop herself from laughing at that one.

Cullen looked askance at Athena, “A little less laughing from you would be nice.”

“Add it to the list of things I have to make up to you later,” Athena smiled.

“You’re getting quite a list,” Curly remarked softly, seductively. 

Then Athena heard, “He’s not married yet. We may still have a chance.”

Athena stopped walking abruptly, causing Cullen to pull on her hand. When he realized she wasn’t moving, he turned to look at her, “Why did you stop?”

“You didn’t hear that comment?” 

“The one about wanting to marry me?” Cullen was confused.

“No,” Athena stood on tiptoe to whisper, “Some of your admirers still think they have a chance with you.”

“We should dissuade them of that notion then,” Curly wrapped a possessive arm around her waist, pulled Duchess tight against him, and kissed her. It was a gentle and sweet kiss, that took entirely too long to reach its end. Of course everyone in attendance gasped, and there were more than a few that bemoaned their unlucky fate.

“Once again, the Inquisitor sets Halamshiral’s wagging tongues on fire,” Morrigan remarked sardonically from behind our lovers.  
Athena chuckled, breaking her gaze with Curly, “Hello, Morrigan.”

Morrigan bowed her head, “My lady.”

“How are you and Kieran?” Athena queried as she, Cullen, and Morrigan started walking to the palace.

“We’re doing well. Commander, I would like to apologize for my behavior while I was at Skyhold. I should have given you more credit,” Morrigan was feeling charitable.

“Thank you, Lady Morrigan,” Cullen was flabbergasted by Morrigan’s sincere apology, but handled it with grace.

“You are welcome. Inquisitor, when you have a moment, Kieran would like to say hello,” Morrigan requested.

“I wish that moment could be now,” Athena sighed as they walked in to the vestibule of the palace and saw Josephine and Ruffles’ mother waiting for her.

Morrigan smiled and went her own way. Cullen kissed Athena and said as he abandoned her, “I’m going to make sure that the soldiers we brought with us are settled.”

Athena went over to Ruffles and hoped she sounded as a noble should (being locked away in the circle didn’t really teach her how to act noble), “Ambassador.”

“Inquisitor Athena Trevelyan, I would like you to meet my mother, Lady Montilyet,” Josephine introduced them.

“Lady Montilyet,” Athena curtsied a little.

“My daughter speaks very highly of you, Inquisitor,” Ruffles’ mom was a bit taller than Josephine and except for the gray hair and hawk-like nose, we now know where Josephine gets her beauty from.

"Lady Josephine is a skilled diplomat who's work is invaluable to the Inquisition, and I consider her one of my closest friends,” Athena responded.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Ruffles blushed.

“What can you tell me of this Qunari that she’s dating?” Lady Montilyet sniffed as though she were smelling for rotten eggs.

“The only thing I will tell you is that he loves your daughter. He would do absolutely anything if it meant getting her to smile. If you want to learn anything else, you will have to talk to him yourself,” Athena was firm. 

"Thank you, Inquisitor,” Lady Montilyet appreciated Duchess’ answer, but it didn’t tell her a whole lot.

“If you’ll excuse me, I do believe someone is looking for me,” Athena was looking past the Montilyets, and walked in that direction.

“Kieran, I know you’re here,” Athena pulled up a tablecloth to look under one of the many tables situated around the room

Kieran giggled, coming out of his hiding place, "Hello.”

“Playing hide and seek?” Athena gave the boy a hug.

“Mother told me you were in the vestibule, I couldn’t wait to see you,” Kieran smiled.

“You’re very sweet, but I think I should return you to your mother,” Athena walked with him back to Morrigan.

“Tommy and I write to each other.” 

“How is he?” Athena asked.

“He’s happy that he’s with his parents, but he says that he misses me,” Kieran seemed suddenly lost.

"I miss him, too," Athena softly reassured him.

“There you are! I told you the Inquisitor would find you when she had time, you should not have run off,” Morrigan scolded Kieran.

“Sorry, Mother,” Kieran looked down at his feet, immediately contrite.

“It’s all right Morrigan. I was finished with my meeting anyway,” Athena smiled.

"Does that mean you have a moment to spare?" Morrigan sardonically asked.

“I certainly hope so.” Athena replied as they walked to Morrigan’s chambers, “What brings you back to Halamshiral?”

“I was invited by the Empress,” Morrigan answered.

“You sound surprised,” Athena remarked as she watched Kieran go to his valise and open it.

“I was… I still am. I wanted to thank you for keeping in touch with Kieran and I, it’s meant the world to him,” Morrigan paused, “Kieran?”

"Tommy sent me something for the Inquisitor and Commander," Kieran explained digging through his things, “found it!” He pulled out two pieces of paper and a small box, blushing, he said, “The box is from me.”

“Thank you, Kieran,” Athena gently took the gifts. Her grateful nature and the care with which she held them told Kieran that they were more precious than gold to her.

“Time to return to your studies, little man,” Morrigan smiled at her son.

“Yes, Mother,” Kieran sat down to read.

Morrigan and Athena went back in to the vestibule after Kieran was settled. Standing above the main stairway, Morrigan asked upon seeing Alistair and Selene, “What are they doing here?”

Athena chuckled, “Maybe we should expect the Champion of Kirkwall next.”

Morrigan chuckled as well, “T’would seem so. Did they bring the baby?”

They looked at the entourage following the King and Queen. Athena sighed with despair touching it, “Yes.”

“Inquisitor?” Morrigan asked. Athena smiled sadly at her, not wanting to mention the baby that was lost. She also knew her friend was quick enough to pick up on it. Which Morrigan did, “You didn’t inform them?”

“No, you were the only one outside of Skyhold that knew,” Athena quietly remarked.

“I am honored,” Morrigan was surprised at this revelation, she had thought everyone had known.

“I consider you a friend, Morrigan,” Athena stated.

“Thank you,” Morrigan bowed her head to show her gratitude.

“You’re welcome,” Athena replied as they fell in behind the royals’ entourage.

"Inquisitor," Leliana said as she appeared beside Athena and then with a hint of shock lacing her voice, “Morrigan?”

Morrigan chuckled, “I was just as surprised to receive an invitation as you are to see me. However, I am grateful to be considered among friends.” And with that she curtsied and left.

“What did you do?” Leliana knew that it was Athena’s fault.

“I told her that I considered her a friend,” Athena answered, “is Hawke coming too?”

Leliana chuckled, “Selene didn’t tell me that she would be here.”

"And here I thought you knew everything,” Athena teased.

"We can ask now, can’t we?” Leliana waved as the king and queen had turned, “Remember, everything she went through changed her.”

“Considering everything that happened, happened near and at Skyhold maybe I should disappear,” Athena wondered why Cullen wasn’t back yet.

“You just want to go find the Commander,” Leliana teased.

“Can you blame me?” Athena remarked, “He would defend me and he doesn’t care for nobles.”

“No,” Leliana laughed.

“When we walked in I over heard someone saying that because we weren’t married yet that there was still a shot with him,” Athena sounded slightly jealous.

"So that was what caused all the gossip I’ve been hearing,” Josephine joined the ladies.

“What happened?” Leliana asked.

“We kissed,” Athena smiled at the memory.

“It sounded as though it was a bit more than a kiss,” Ruffles teased.

“And by the time the ball starts we’ll have been making love in the fountain. I’m sorry for earlier, Ambassador,” Athena wanted Josephine to know that she hadn’t meant to abandon her.

"Oh no, that was perfect. My mother watched your every move with Kieran and seemed very pleased. She even agreed to meet with Bull,” Josephine refused Duchess’ apology.

“I’m glad it went well…” Athena had become distracted with her worry over Curly.

“Inquisitor, stop worrying,” Leliana chuckled.

“Says the one that sends out search parties in Skyhold,” Athena teased.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Leliana blush,” Alistair remarked as he and Selene walked over to our heroines.

“I do not blush!” Leliana grumbled as she clearly blushed.

Ruffles curtsied, “Your Majesties.”

"Ambassador," they both replied. 

Athena didn’t say anything right away as Johan had walked over at the same time and started talking to her. Leliana noticed, “Inquisitor?”

“I’m sorry, but I have to go,” Athena left with Johan.

“That was abrupt,” Selene commented.

“It was,” Leliana quietly remarked as she watched Athena and Johan leave, worried as to what it meant.

“Johan, you’re not making any sense,” Athena was getting frustrated as they left the vestibule and returned to the garden.

“They won’t leave him alone,” Johan tried to explain.

“The soldiers?” Athena was still incredibly confused.

“No, these people,” Johan answered as they entered the garden. Athena saw a crowd of people surrounding Cullen and she shook her head thinking that the earlier display didn’t have the intended consequences.

Morrigan stood beside Athena, “It looks as though your love’s admirers have found him again.”

Athena chuckled as they walked down the stairs, “It does look that way….”

“The Commander does not look as though he’s enjoying the attention,” Morrigan commented.

“Worse than that, Morrigan,” Athena murmured. She noticed the pinched lines around her love’s brown eyes, and that he was holding himself far too stiffly (even for Curly, who generally has a stiff position.) She made her way through the crowd to Cullen. When she reached him, she smiled as if nothing was wrong and cheerfully said, “Hello.”

Cullen looked down at her and whispered, “Hello.” 

Athena kissed him, running the fingers of her free hand through his hair to hide the magic she was using to at least make the headache go away. When they stopped kissing, Cullen’s brown eyes opened to gaze in to Athena’s violet ones and he whispered, “Thank you.”

“I love you,” Athena was loud enough for everyone surrounding them to hear.

Morrigan chuckled, “The Commander and Inquisitor have been separated enough for this day.” The crowd quietly dispersed. “You two are going to set Halamshiral’s wagging tongues on fire by the time you leave.”

Athena still hadn’t broken her gaze with Cullen, needing to make sure he was all right, “Are you all right?”

"I am now," Cullen brushed an errant lock of auburn hair back behind her shoulder and took hold of her hand. He looked at Morrigan, “Thank you.”

“You sent Johan?” Athena’s gaze left her lover’s and fell on Morrigan. The trio started walking through the garden.

“If that’s the young man that watches Leliana like a love sick puppy, then yes, I did,” Morrigan answered.

Athena chuckled, “He’s also terrified of her. Thank you, Morrigan.”

“I may be thought of as heartless, but I would not let my only friend’s love suffer idiots,” Morrigan disappeared.

“Her only friend?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“We kept in touch after she left Skyhold,” Athena blushed.

Cullen smiled at her, “Always taking in the outcasts aren’t you?”

“I trust her… Even though I may have grown up surrounded by people, I was just as alone as she was in the Wilds.” Athena stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek, “and I’m not the only one that takes in outcasts... you’re marrying one.”

“You’re not an outcast anymore, Athena,” Cullen quietly reminded her, uneasy with the guilt he had over how her life had been before the conclave.

Athena smiled at him, “You can’t change my past, Cullen, and being an outcast isn’t necessarily a bad thing.”

Cullen shook his head, leaving this battle for another day, “How much does Morrigan know about us?”

“She knows about the baby,” Athena paused, “and that I…”

“We lost it,” Cullen interrupted softly. He needed her to know that she wasn’t suffering alone, and that he could never entertain the idea of blaming her. Athena looked up at him with unshed tears and he bent down to gently kiss her.

Leliana was the first to see them walk in to the vestibule, “Is everything all right?”

"The Commander needed rescuing," Athena lightly teased.

“If I’m going to have such a beautiful rescuer, I think I’m going to find myself in trouble more often,” Cullen teased back.

“I’ll just have Varric be your bodyguard instead of mine,” Athena chuckled at Cullen’s groan.

“The Commander’s admirers got the better of him again?” Leliana questioned as they walked through the vestibule to where the royals and Ruffles were waiting.

“Something like that,” Cullen blushed slightly. 

Selene was holding the baby when she turned to see that Cullen and Athena were walking toward them. Athena hesitated. Cullen squeezed her hand and she said, “Your Majesties, I apologize for earlier, but there was something that needed my immediate attention.”

“How many admirers does your fine Commander have?” Selene smiled at our lovers.

“Why do you assume it was me?” Cullen put an arm around Athena’s waist, needing to feel her close to him. Athena looked up at him and smiled.

Selene shook her head. She remembered all too well how many of the single mages had a crush on Curly… She was one of them, “You always seem to have admirers and you never pay any attention to them.”

"I pay attention to the one that is important," Cullen murmured, looking at Athena.

Selene smiled, happy to see them so in love, “Inquisitor, without you neither one of us would be here, would you like to hold her?”

“I-,” Athena paused, took a deep breath, “yes.” Selene put the sleeping infant in to Athena’s arms and Duchess gasped softly, “She’s beautiful.”

“I wish I could take the credit,” Alistair smiled. It was obvious he was over the moon with his adopted daughter.

“You can take credit for the next one,” Selene teased her husband, knowing it would get a rise out of him.

“What are you saying?! We all know that the next one will get their looks from you!” Alistair kissed his wife.

Athena pulled the blanket down from the baby’s face and the baby grabbed hold of one of her fingers. Tears sprang instantly to Duchess’ violet eyes. The call for dinner rang out, breaking the moment, and Athena had to give the baby back. Athena was able to get out a hoarse, “Thank you,” before the royals left to get ready for dinner.

“Commander?” Leliana asked quietly standing by the door. She wondered if she should make excuses for our lovers so they could have the evening to heal.

“We’ll be there in a minute,” Cullen answered. As the door closed behind Nightingale, He pulled Athena in to his embrace and held her as she cried. When the tears had subsided he whispered, “You didn’t have to…”

“Yes, I did. Even if I could have thought of a way to refuse… I wouldn’t have been able to,” Athena said quietly. Cullen kissed her to hide his own tears that sprang in to his eyes. After the kiss she shakily sighed, “Should we go in to eat now?”

“I think we deserve a couple minutes alone, don’t you?” He refused to release her.

“I would like that,” Athena sighed and put her ear to Curly’s chest to listen to the gentle thrumming of his heartbeat.

After a couple minutes of silence, and feeling Athena relax, Cullen wondered, “How could you tell that I was in pain earlier?”

“There were little things… You whispered hello. You only do that when you’re in pain,” Athena looked up at him. “How did you know that Morrigan sent for me?”

“I saw her talking to Johan, he left, she stayed. At least this time all they wanted to talk about was you,” Cullen caressed her cheek.

Athena closed her eyes and sighed, "We should go in there before Leliana sends a search party after us.”

Josephine noticed when they entered the grand ballroom and sighed in relief. Selene heard her sigh, “You were worried they wouldn’t come in?”

“They lost someone dear to them recently,” Leliana answered quietly.

“I am sorry to hear that,” Alistair stood as our lovers approached.

“Alistair?” Selene was lost as to why her husband was standing.

"I wanted to talk to the Commander," he excused himself. When he caught up to them, he nodded at Athena and asked, “Commander, can I talk to you for a moment?”

"Certainly, Your Majesty," Cullen released Athena's hand so she could join the others. “What did you want to talk about?”

“I wanted to thank you for everything you did for us at Skyhold,” Alistair wondered if he should ask what had been pressing on his mind. Deciding that it was too important a question, he sought Cullen’s help, “How did you get the dreams to stop?”

“I didn’t, they still happen on an almost nightly basis,” Cullen responded quietly.

"How do you…” Alistair paused, shocked by the revelation, “how are you still sane?”

“Focus on the good things in your life. You and your wife love each other and you have a beautiful daughter,” Cullen reminded him.

"The demon used old memories of Morrigan and I against us,” Alistair confessed.

“I was under the impression you and Morrigan didn’t care for one another,” Cullen was confused.

"We didn't and don't. If Selene had gone up against the archdemon without what Morrigan and I did, she would have died. All part of being a grey warden,” Alistair said the last sarcastically, “Kieran’s my son…”

“And the demon somehow knew,” Cullen stated.

“Selene must have forgotten that she supported the idea. She thinks Morrigan had a part in her captivity and harming the baby,” Alistair choked out, fighting tears.

“I am sorry, Your Majesty,” Cullen watched the table. At that moment Empress Celene came in to eat and sat down at the head table, “It appears that we’re needed.”

Once they sat at the table the Empress asked, “Where is Morrigan?”

"Morrigan's here?” Selene almost growled.

“Yes, we invited her,” Celene said, “We need her here to explain why we wanted all of you to arrive before the ball.”

“I apologize, Your Highness. I had a personal matter that kept me from arriving on time,” Morrigan sat on the opposite side of Athena. Athena looked at Morrigan who shook her head briefly, “Please continue.”

“Before we announce our being with child tomorrow night, we thought it would only be fair to inform our allies first.” Empress Celene took a sip of water, “In the event of an untimely demise and our child has not become of age, we would ask that the Inquisitor serve as Empress until an Orlesian could rule.”

“Congratulations on being with child. I am honored by your generous offer, I must decline. As you so eloquently put it, I am not Orlesian, and I am also a Mage. Neither one is looked on very favorably here. I fear the wars it would cause,” Athena politely declined.

“Then we are left with no choice but to offer this to Sister Leliana. The Council of Heralds has already approved both of you,” Empress Celene looked to Leliana.

"I am not of noble birth,” Leliana was astounded at this turn of events.

“This is only to serve until our child has come of age,” the Empress responded.

“You are incredibly gracious, Inquisitor,” Morrigan smiled at her friend’s quick thinking, and that Duchess wasn’t running from the room screaming. Athena glanced at her in acknowledgement.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Celene stood to leave, “Leliana, we will need your answer by tomorrow at noontime.”

“Well, Leliana?” Alistair asked.

“I don’t know…” Leliana trailed off, not wanting to air her suspicions in so public a place.

Cullen whispered in Athena’s ear, “Are you all right?”

Athena squeezed his hand, and came to Nightingale’s rescue, “I think Leliana may need some time to think, Your Majesty.”

“Speaking of thinking… Why did you have me taken captive, Morrigan? Have you held on to your lust for him after all these years?” Selene abruptly changed the subject.

“What are you talking about, Selene?” Morrigan was shocked and now irritated.

“During the blight, you seduced him and you knew we were in love!” Selene exclaimed fury dancing in her blue eyes.

“I most certainly did not. What he and I did, you approved of and it was to save your life. I was completely honest with him and you!” Morrigan indignantly replied.

“The demon that held me captive for months showed a far different scenario,” Selene growled.

“You would trust a demon’s word over mine? Over your own memories? During the fifth blight you trusted me so much that you wanted me to teach you to be a shapeshifter. Have the times changed so much?” Morrigan was incredulous.

“I was under the impression that even though we hadn’t talked since the blight that we still had at least a mutual respect for one another if not a friendship. Only to have you send a demon after me while I was trying to save myself and Alistair from going to the deep roads,” Selene was unwilling to admit that her memory wasn’t what it used to be.

“I had no idea what you were doing nor did I care. If I wanted to hurt you, why would I deprive myself the satisfaction of it? And If we were so friendly, why didn’t you stay in touch?” Morrigan rejoined.

“You disappeared! And said you didn’t want to be followed! I thought I would respect your decision!” Selene jumped on that.

“I disappeared from Skyhold as well. The Inquisitor didn’t seem to have an issue tracking me down. You remember me asking you to not follow me, but not that you gave your approval of Alistair and I sharing a bed?! Come now, Selene, how can you expect me to believe that?” Morrigan’s amber eyes spit flames at her former friend.

Athena closed her eyes and murmured, “I really don’t want involved in this.”

“Looks like you already are,” Cullen whispered in her ear.

“Are you really saying that you didn’t send that demon after me?” Selene didn’t want to believe Morrigan. If she did, it would mean that her memory loss was worse than she feared.

“Aye, I am,” Morrigan challenged, knowing that what she was saying was the truth.

“Your Majesty, the demon was after me. You and the King were being used by her so she could get to me. I am sorry, I thought you had already been informed of this,” Athena quietly interrupted the argument, not wanting to see a friendship destroyed over her.

“I told you all this right before you left for Denerim, Selene,” Leliana backed Duchess.

"She doesn't have any memory of that conversation, Leliana,” Alistair quietly confessed for his wife.

“Why not?” Leliana felt the hairs on her neck stand up.

"When we got back to Denerim, Selene took a dose of the blight's cure. It took away about a month’s worth of her memories. Including some less favored older memories,” Alistair took hold of Selene’s hand as she bowed her head, embarrassed.

“You truly do not remember giving your approval?” Morrigan softly questioned. When Selene shook her head, Morrigan continued, “What exactly is remembered then?”

“I remember being released from the chains and then everything goes dark for about a month,” Selene choked out, trying desperately to hide her tears.

“When I talked to you in Skyhold you remembered everything, including Athena healing you and the baby the first time,” Leliana interjected.

“That’s why Alistair knows it wasn’t Athena’s magic. The demon had intended on harming the baby. I protected her and I was chained to the wall. That is when I started seeing the images of Alistair and Morrigan. The demon kept telling me that their bond could never be broken, and that Morrigan had told her to take me captive,” Selene rasped out.

“This demon had writings on the walls?” Morrigan was impatient for answers.

“She did,” Athena said.

“She was no ordinary demon. When you healed Selene what did you use?” Morrigan looked to her right to face Duchess.

“Everything I could…” Athena paused, “A sleeping spell, and I tried to heal anything broken.”

“In both the babe and the Queen?”

“Yes,” Athena answered.

“Was anything broken?” Morrigan asked.

“As soon as we released Selene from the chains the cave started trembling and I thought it was more important to heal her, the baby, and get them out before finding out what damage was done,” Athena responded.

“Yes, Morrigan, I had broken bones, and so did the baby. The demon was slowly killing us,” Selene stated.

“Alistair were you tortured as well?” Morrigan questioned.

“I was,” Alistair said quietly.

“Morrigan?” Athena wondered where she was going with this.

“I do not think it was the blight’s cure that caused the memory loss. The reason Selene was seeing those images was because it was what Alistair was seeing,” Morrigan explained.

“A kind of mental link? Or a shared dream?” Athena guessed.

Morrigan smiled proudly, “Exactly. When you healed Selene, you tapped in to that link. I’m assuming the demon isn’t alive anymore?” 

“No, it is not,” Cullen joined in the conversation.

“’Tis odd that this still exists, and that the memories did not return upon the demon’s death. Inquisitor, do you have any memory loss from that time?” Morrigan questioned.

“I was told that I fell off of my horse, after I stopped Selene from waking a second time. But by the time that supposedly happened Leliana and Cassandra had rode ahead to get Selene to safety on my orders,” Athena explained.

“You were alone?” Morrigan quirked and eyebrow at Curly, ready to launch in to him.

“I was,” Athena answered as she almost imperceptibly shook her head at Morrigan, warning her friend off, “the demon died within days of saving Selene.”

“You were all still in Skyhold, and with the specialness of the place it held the link together. When Alistair and Selene went to Denerim the link stretched and snapped, and because Selene suffered the most…” Morrigan trailed off.

“She got the worst of the memory loss,” Athena finished.

“And you took on some of what Selene went through because of healing her…”

“I suffered some of the consequences as well,” Athena stated.

“Is that why Athena was in pain after she had been healed from her injuries?” Cullen asked.

“Aye, ‘twas Commander,” Morrigan was surprised as this was news to her, “you didn’t tell me that you had been in pain, Inquisitor?”

“I had become ill once before for over extending my powers. I had assumed that was what it was,” Athena remarked.

“Morrigan knew?” Selene seemed as though she was a pot ready to boil over.

“After everything happened, I told her. We kept in touch,” Athena shrugged, indifferent to the Queen’s anger.

Morrigan smirked, “The point of this is that the memories can be restored, because they were taken by magic. That is if you would like…” 

“Yes,” Selene immediately agreed.

“Inquisitor?”

Athena nodded and they waited on Alistair’s nod. Morrigan waved her hand and the month of missing memories came flooding back for Selene and Athena remembered falling off of her horse and crawling towards Skyhold until she passed out.

“Why was the demon after you, Inquisitor?” Alistair questioned.

“Because she wanted what I have,” Athena looked down at her hand that was entwined with Curly’s.

“Being Inquisitor?” Selene investigated.

“No,” Athena abruptly stood, ending the line of questioning, “as eventful as this day and evening has been, I think I’m going to turn in. Goodnight.”

Cullen and Morrigan stood as well. Morrigan said, “I believe our quarters are close together.” And she walked along.

Athena dropped Cullen’s hand murmuring, “I forgot something,” and dashed back to the table to grab the gifts from Kieran and Tommy.

Once she reached Cullen and Morrigan, Morrigan couldn’t help but chuckle, “Have you been carrying those around all day?”

Athena chuckled as well, “Yes. I haven’t had a moment to even glance at them.”

“What are they?” Curly was mildly curious.

“Gifts from Kieran and Tommy,” Athena answered, “was it Kieran that tracked Tommy down?”

“Aye, it was. I have a sneaking suspicion that he made it easier for you as well,” Morrigan glanced about the long and ornate corridor our trio had just turned in to.

“How would he be able to do that?” Athena wondered if the boy was a mage.

“I am… Uncertain,” Morrigan said. Certain things about her son remained a mystery to her. They walked the rest of the way in companionable silence, Cullen and Athena reached their room first, Morrigan said, “Thank you for defending me tonight, Inquisitor. I am in your debt once again.”

“Morrigan, you can call me Athena and you turned in to a dragon to help us defeat Corypheus… You don’t owe me anything,” Athena reminded her.

“I know I said this in my letter, but I am truly sorry for your loss. Goodnight,” Morrigan continued on to her room.

Athena sighed wearily as she leaned against the door and looked up at Cullen, “I thought this was supposed to be a fun trip.”

Cullen kissed her and opened the door behind her, “Why don’t we change that?”

“Gladly,” Athena returned his kiss. Before they undressed Athena put her gifts on the nightstand by the bed and they made passionate love. 

**

The morning broke and Athena was up with the dawn. She sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the gifts from Tommy and Kieran. Tommy had made two drawings, one of him with his parents, and one of him with Athena. Kieran’s box had an intricate design carved in to it and when she opened it, it had a little sprig of heather in it. Athena chuckled, waking Cullen, who said softly, “Morning.”

“I’m sorry for waking you,” Athena whispered in return.

“I will never be bothered by waking to your laughter,” Cullen reached out for her. She showed him what was in the box, he chuckled, “You told Kieran about South Reach.”

Athena shrugged helplessly, “He always seemed so much older than his years, but then there were the rare moments where he seemed like any other child. I try to write of things that would interest little boys. I didn’t think he would catch on to the flower thing though.”

Cullen gently took the box from her and closed it. He placed it back on the night stand. Curly proceeded to pull Athena back on to the bed, and she laughed, “Cullen, we can’t.”

“You want to talk to Leliana,” Cullen stated... He sounded as though he was disappointed about working. (It’s a good thing Duchess broke him of the notion of all work and no play.)

“I do. The Empress choosing me or Leliana in the event of her death makes absolutely no sense.” 

“Not interested in becoming Empress?” Cullen teased.

“No, I have more than enough titles,” Athena pulled herself away from her lover and bed.

Cullen chuckled as he got out of bed, “I’m very glad to hear you say that.”

Athena laughed, “You don’t want to become Emperor?”

“Andraste preserve me, no,” Cullen responded as he finished dressing. Before they left the room they kissed tenderly.


	35. Chapter 35

“I don’t understand Empress Celene wanting me or the Inquisitor taking over for her. Something isn’t right,” Leliana said to Ruffles. They were sitting at a table in the grand library.

“I agree, Leliana,” Athena walked in to the library with Curly.

“What do we know?” Cullen asked.

“She’s definitely with child. She says she still has months to go, but…” Leliana trailed off, hesitating to say what she thought.

“But?” Athena encouraged Nightingale to continue.

“She looks like she could give birth any day,” Leliana responded.

“Do you know who?” Josephine questioned.

“She refuses to say,” Leliana sounded exasperated.

“She didn’t look very far along last night,” Athena reminded everyone.

“Dim lighting and she said she had the court mage hide how far along she was,” Leliana got up to pace.

"Why would she keep it a secret this long?" Athena wasn’t really expecting an answer.

“She’s terrified, but she won’t tell me who or what it is,” Nightingale explained.

“Is she abdicating tonight?” Cullen asked.

“It certainly seems that way,” Leliana answered.

"Have you talked to her healers?" Athena inquired.

“They all say the same thing. Everything is fine, and that she isn’t expected to have the baby for another several months,” Josephine responded for Leliana.

“Do you think she would let me see her privately?” Athena hoped that they could get to the bottom of this quickly.

“I won’t ask you to do that,” Leliana immediately refused. She was unwilling to put Athena in a situation that would remind her of what she lost.

“You’re not asking me. There are a lot of things not making sense here and we need to get it sorted out before tonight,” Athena explained.

"Are you certain?" Cullen took hold of Athena’s hand and searched her violet eyes for some uncertainty or fear.

“Yes,” Athena smiled at Curly, hoping to reassure him, “I think we should bring Morrigan in on this. She knows Celene better than any of us.”

“Morrigan may be able to get a meeting with her faster than I could considering I refused the honor,” Leliana said.

"Who was her third choice?" Cullen inquired, relieved that Athena seemed okay.

“One of the council members,” Leliana answered.

"That's not worrisome at all," Cullen said sarcastically. (Wait… Curly? Sarcastic? Have I mentioned lately how awesome Duchess is?) Athena laughed.

“Commander!” Ruffles exclaimed. Nightingale cracked a smile.

"She would have been safer bringing Gaspard out of exile," Cullen turned serious. (That’s the Curly we all know and love.)

“But the council doesn’t approve of him,” Josephine reminded everyone.

“At least it would be family,” Athena quietly joined the debate. Leliana returned to her seat as Athena stood. She sighed, “I’m going to go find Morrigan.” And then turned her attention to Cullen, “Walk with me?”

“Of course,” Cullen smiled. He stood and entwined Duchess’ fingers with his. 

They walked quietly until they found Morrigan in her rooms. After explaining the meeting to Morrigan, she responded, “I’ve been wondering about that myself as one of the reasons she let me stay was to assist her in having children.”

“Should we try to meet with her?” Athena asked.

“There will not be any trying…. We will meet with her and it will be without this love of hers,” Morrigan answered. 

Cullen kissed Athena goodbye, “I’m going to go check on the soldiers.”

Morrigan and Athena went to the Empress’s chambers. Morrigan knocked and spoke first, “Your Highness, the Inquisitor and I would like an audience with you.”

The door was opened by servants to reveal a very pregnant Celene pacing and moaning. Athena said to Morrigan, “She’s in labor.” And they rushed over to her

“No, I cannot,” Celene moaned. One of the servants walked over to her and had Celene drink from a silver goblet. Athena and Morrigan recognized the smell as lyrium. When the servant put the goblet down, Morrigan walked over to it and sniffed, there was more than lyrium.

Celene ordered, “You are dismissed. We have the best care now.” 

Once the door was closed Celene invited them to sit. Both Morrigan and Athena were hesitant to do so and then the Empress suddenly fell to her knees. She grasped her large belly and moaned. They helped her up and guided her to the closest chair. Once the Empress was safely sitting, she ground out, “I need the brown box by the bed.”

Morrigan went to get it and opened it. She took a draught out and opened that, wondering what the off scent was, “How does this aid you?”

“It is to stop the pain,” Celene rubbed her burgeoning belly and slid deeper in to the chair.

“Lyrium doesn’t stop contractions, it makes them worse,” Athena stated, irritation lacing her voice. 

“Celene, what have you done?” Morrigan was still holding on to the lyrium. She watched Celene closely, there was something off about her.

“I need a child...everything we tried...always ending in failure….” Celene panted with a white knuckle grip on the sides of her chair as another contraction took over, “I’ll tell you… everything….if I can have...the draught.”

Morrigan stood beside Athena, still holding on to the box. Duchess whispered, "She's killing herself and possibly the baby as well." She raised her voice so the Empress could hear, “Your Highness, would it be all right if I looked at you?”

Morrigan’s eyes got wide, catching on to what Athena was thinking, “Celene, the Inquisitor is a very skilled healer. You should let her look at you.” 

Celene nodded her assent, unable to do more. Athena walked over to her, “I’m going to need you to lay down. We will make you as comfortable as possible.” Celene grabbed hold of Athena's hand and squeezed. Athena rubbed her back as she was hunched over and said quietly, “You need to breathe through the contractions or they’ll just get worse.”

Celene gasped for air and released Athena’s hand as the contraction passed.

“Let’s get you to bed,” Athena helped her up. Morrigan placed the lyrium back beside Celene’s bed and helped Athena get Celene in to it. Once Celene was situated on the bed she reached for the box, “I am sorry, Your Majesty, but I cannot have you using anything.”

Celene could not keep still while Athena saw how far along the labor was. Grunting and groaning the entire time, she would press herself deep in the bed and grip the sheets. Then she would arch her back as if there were hot coals underneath it. 

Morrigan watched Celene carefully, there was something wavering around her, almost as though it was an aura or a magic to make one appear as someone else. Morrigan gasped as the magic slipped, revealing a woman with black hair and looked nothing like Celene. Morrigan whispered to Duchess about what she was seeing.

"Your body is telling you to push. This child is coming now,” Athena finished examining the imposter Celene and shrugged helplessly at Morrigan.

"We cannot have it today,” Celene rolled to her side and grabbed for the lyrium in between the near constant contractions. Morrigan deftly kept it away from her. The imposter moaned and laid back on the bed.

“How often do you take that?” Athena was able to see what Morrigan saw now.

“At least once an hour… if not... We cannot function,” Imposter Celene gasped out.

“How long have you been taking it in such quantities?” Athena was worried for the babe and the foolish woman.

“We have taken lyrium since we found out we were with child,” Imposter Celene closed her eyes and held her breath as another contraction hit.

“You need to breathe. When the contractions start you need to breathe in slowly and then you need to breathe out just as slowly. If you want to have this baby, I can deliver it for you,” Athena hoped to save the baby.

“It’s too soon,” Celene moaned.

“Your body is telling you that you are ready, and so is the baby,” Athena quietly spoke.

“Are you certain?” Imposter Celene gripped the sheets but breathed as Duchess instructed.

“As certain as anyone can be,” Athena gently replied.

“There’s nothing you can do to slow the labor down?” Celene requested as she arched her back to fight the urge to push.

“You’re too far along for anything I know to work,” Athena was irritated with this person’s incessant questions, “The only ones you are hurting is yourself and your baby.”

"The only way the Inquisitor can help is to deliver the baby. No harm will come to you or the child if it is born on this day,” Morrigan took on the role of peacekeeper. “What does she need to do, Inquisitor?”

“When the next contraction hits, she needs to push,” Athena ordered, still irritated.

"Listen to her,” Morrigan implored. Imposter Celene did as she was told and within minutes a healthy baby girl was born. Morrigan towered over the woman, “Who are you, and where is the Empress?”

“I’m just a servant, my lady. The Empress paid me to walk around pretending to be her. But I haven’t seen her in a few weeks,” The woman shook in fear. Servants and healers came in, taking over. Morrigan and Athena left to meet the others in the library.

“Did you talk to her?” Leliana asked as soon as she saw them.

“We talked to someone, and the Inquisitor did a bit more than that,” Morrigan cryptically answered.

"You were the one that convinced her,” Athena sighed, “I’m starting to think that maybe I should hide behind Skyhold’s walls.”

“As thrilled as that would make the Commander, I don’t see that happening,” Leliana chuckled.

“If I have to keep delivering babies every time I venture beyond them, it’s going to,” Athena complained as she sat down, “Orlais has a new baby girl to claim as a citizen.”

“Why are you referring to the Empress’s newborn that way?” Josephine asked.

“I think we should wait for the Commander before explaining. ‘Tis quite the tale,” Morrigan responded.

“Where is he?” Athena looked around eagerly, hoping to catch a glimpse of her fiance.

“Helping Kieran get a book, apparently he’s read all the ones he brought with him,” Leliana answered.

Morrigan chuckled, “I told him to pick other books as he has read them so many times he has them memorized, but he said they were his favorites.”

“Hello Mother, goodbye Mother,” Kieran raced past the table they were sitting at causing everyone there to chuckle.

“Commander, what did you do to my son?” Morrigan arched an eyebrow at Curly and came across as miffed.

“I found one of my favorite books as a child and told him a little about it,” Cullen smiled as he sat beside Athena.

“My son does not move that fast unless you promise him something or offer him chocolate,” Morrigan glowered at Duchess. (I think she was teasing, but one can never be too sure of Morrigan.)

“I couldn’t bring a brownie for Tommy without bringing one for him, that would have been cruel,” Athena was completely and totally unrepentant.

“I may have promised him that we would practice sword fighting a bit later,” Cullen smiled at his fiancee.

“He’s going to want to move back to Skyhold,” Morrigan intimated softly.

Athena chuckled, “You’re always welcome.”

"Thank you," Morrigan bowed her head in thanks.

“Athena delivered a healthy baby girl during their audience with the Empress,” Josephine said to bring Curly up to speed, impatiently waiting for the full story.

“Are you sure you don’t want to hide behind Skyhold’s walls?” Cullen only half teased.

Athena laughed, “As nice as that would be…”

“It can be arranged,” Cullen responded and then softer, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine,” Athena smiled at him, “She took a lot of convincing.”

“I’m not following,” Cullen was confused, as was the rest at the table, including the ones that spoke to the Imposter Empress.

“We thought we were getting an audience with the Empress,” Athena answered.

“What do you mean?” Leliana found Athena’s answer quite cryptic.

“I’m letting Morrigan explain it,” Athena was still trying to figure out all that happened. 

“When we arrived the person looking like Celene was in labor, and taking something that had lyrium in it,” Morrigan started and smiled as she enjoyed the shocked looks on their faces. She explained everything and ended with, “The woman that had just given birth said that she was just a servant, and that Celene had paid her to go around looking like her.”

“How is that possible? Where is the real Celene?” Leliana ran possibilities through her mind. None of them made any sense.

“I know not,” Morrigan replied.

"Was the Celene from last night an imposter too?" Cullen thought out loud.

“I have no answers for you at the moment,” Morrigan answered.

“And here I thought we would be able to actually enjoy Halamshiral.” Athena stood after kissing Curly, “You’re going to have an audience.”

“Oh, I have to see this,” Leliana stood, “Josie are you coming?”

“Bull and I are meeting with my mother…” Ruffles sounded sad.

Athena hugged her, “It will be fine. You know Bull can be very charming.”

“What’s this?” Cullen wondered why Athena would know if the former qunari was charming or not.

“You didn’t tell him?” Nightingale observed.

Athena gave Leliana a quizzical look, not understanding what she was asking. Then it dawned on her… Athena gasped, “I forgot.”

Leliana and Morrigan chuckled as they left. Cullen stared at Athena, not entirely sure if he was going to like where this was going, and waited.

“When we met, Bull flirted with me a little. Varric quickly disabused him of the notion of pursuing anything other than friendship,” Athena paused as she saw Cullen start to glower, “When he saw how I looked at you, he started giving suggestions on what I could do to get your attention.”

Cullen kissed her. They walked hand in hand out of the library. Before reaching the doors to the garden, Cullen halted, “Are you certain you’re all right?”

“Cullen,” Athena sighed. She wished this could wait, “Just because we lost our baby doesn’t mean I can stop everyone else from having theirs… I’m not going to lie and say that it doesn’t hurt, because it does, but if I gave in to that hurt, I would never get out of bed.”

Cullen kissed her and whispered, “I love you, Athena.”

“I love you, too,” Athena reached up to play with his hair, “You have a sword fight to get to.”

Cullen smiled at her as they walked through the doors and he left Duchess with us as he got blunted swords for him and Kieran to use. It was more of a teaching lesson than an actual sword fight, but Kieran had a blast. After it was over he ran up to Morrigan and asked, “Can we move back to Skyhold, please?”

Morrigan chuckled, “The Commander teaching my son to use swords and the Inquisitor bribing him with brownies…. Would I ever get to see you?”

“Of course, Mother!”

“We’ll think about it,” Morrigan murmured as she took her son inside.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen the Commander lose that graciously,” Leliana commented.

Athena laughed, “That’s because he usually doesn’t.”

“What is it that I don’t do?” Cullen dropped an arm around Athena’s shoulders.

“Lose,” Athena answered.

“Graciously,” Leliana smirked.

“How would you know?” Cullen narrowed his brown eyes on the red haired spymaster.

“Dorian is very vocal when he defeats you in chess,” Leliana smiled.

“Dorian also likes to exaggerate,” Cullen complained.

“I wonder how Josie’s meeting went,” Athena wisely changed the subject before blood was drawn.

“Unfortunately, there’s no time to find out, we all have to get ready for the ball,” Leliana reminded them.

“Can I run and hide?” Athena was only half joking.

Leliana laughed, “We’ll protect you.”

“For once, I’m going to take you up on that,” Athena sighed wearily as Leliana left. She turned her attention to something happy. Cullen seemed like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. She wondered, “You enjoyed teaching Kieran?”

“I did, and he did better than some of the new recruits I get,” Cullen smiled at her.

“I enjoyed watching you.” Athena led him in to their room and collapsed on the bed, “Care to be fashionably late?”

Cullen chuckled, stripped, and they made love, until I was sent to knock on the door, “You’re late.”

Athena laughed, “Thank you, Varric. You can come in.”

“I’ve already seen Curly naked, I can wait until our next game of Wicked Grace for that,” I griped.

"Dwarf!" 

I heard Duchess laughing again, “I promise you that it’s safe.”

I came in to Curly partially dressed and Duchess brushing her hair. Curly was saying, “This is your fault.”

Athena threw a pillow at him, “You could have said no.”

“You didn’t mean to be late?” I questioned.

“Not this late,” Athena smiled.

"How late did you intend to be?" I was curious (for the book’s purpose only.)

Athena blushed, "I fell asleep."

“You never just fall asleep,” I reminded her.

“When I am very comfortable and incredibly tired I do.”

Curly smirked. I couldn’t resist teasing, “I understand the tired part, but isn’t he kind of hard to sleep on?”

“Dwarf!” Curly warned.

“Not for me,” Athena smiled at Cullen, which made him blush.

“I thought Ruffles wanted you to wear something else?” I noticed the simple and elegant violet dress she had on.

“She… was distracted,” Athena blushed.

“What did you do?” I accused.

“I didn’t do anything,” Athena tried to play off the innocent, but the growing blush gave her away.

“What did you and Leliana do?” Cullen also accused, finally ready to go.

“It wasn’t just us…” Athena’s blush got brighter.

“You’re usually not one for cryptic…” I complained.

“Bull asked us to get an invitation for Josie’s mother to come here.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Really, Varric?” Athena sounded as though I should know the answer to my question. Cullen looked like a proud mother hen, which Athena noticed, “What did you do?”

“Nothing, Bull and I just talked,” Cullen answered.

“He’s going to propose to her tonight isn’t he?” Athena questioned, but it was more of a statement.

“You cannot tell her,” Cullen warned.

“Why would I tell her?! Oh, this is fantastic!” Athena was very excited.

“If Curly had proposed to you this way, you wouldn’t have been very happy,” I reminded.

“I adore Josephine, but she loves spectacles. For months, all Leliana and I have heard is how she would plan her engagement, where it would be, who would be attending,” Athena stopped, “I’m going to kill her.” Curly and I looked at Athena like she had suddenly grown another head. Athena continued walking and talking not noticing our looks, “Josie said once that she would like all the royalty she had become acquainted with to be in attendance if Bull ever decided to propose.”

“But why wouldn’t Leliana tell you?” Cullen asked as we were both still confused.

“I don’t know, but, I am going to find out,” Athena was quite irritated with Nightingale.

“What about Morrigan?” I questioned.

“No, that one came from Celene,” Athena said with certainty.

As we approached the grand ballroom doors Leliana caught up with us, “It’s about time!”

“You could have told me that the King and Queen of Fereldan are here for Josie,” Athena quietly reprimanded her.

“They had told me that they weren’t coming. I was just as surprised as you were. Back to the matter of you two being more than fashionably late?” Leliana raised an eyebrow at our lovers.

“I fell asleep,” Athena blushed.

“How?” Leliana asked.

“I was tired and really comfortable,” Athena blushed more. Curly smirked again.

“Commander?” Leliana took note of his smirk.

“After the morning she had I thought the Inquisitor could use some sleep,” Cullen refused to admit that he fell asleep too.

I chuckled, “You fell asleep too.” Curly’s blush was all the answer we needed.

Not long after we entered the ballroom it was announced, “The Empress Celene regrets to inform you that she will be late to the ball. While she is attending to this matter please feel free to dance, eat, and enjoy yourselves.”

Cullen looked down at Duchess, “Would you care to dance, my lady?”

Athena teased, “I should say no…” She paused to kiss him, “but I won’t. I would love to dance with you, Commander.”

They twirled around the dance floor. With eyes only for each other, and an occasional laugh from Athena as one of Curly’s admirers ran sobbing from the room. When the dance ended Alistair asked if he could dance with Athena and Selene asked if she could dance with Cullen. 

Cullen started, “I am sorry for all the things I said to you when the Fereldan Circle fell.”

“Commander, you don’t have to apologize to me for that. You…” Selene paused, “even though I didn’t agree with you, I understood where you were coming from. Will you tell me of this demon that held me captive and tortured my husband?”

Cullen looked away, “She was a love interest from before I became a Templar… She was human then. We went our separate ways and I didn’t really give her another thought until the Inquisitor asked about past love interests.”

“The Inquisitor lied to me then,” Selene was trying not to get angry, but it was so very hard.

“No, everything she said was true. The demon wanted me to care for her again,” Cullen responded.

“When the Inquisitor said that the demon wanted what she has, she meant you,” Selene finally understood what Athena said, and why she refused to elaborate.

Cullen nodded, "I am sorry."

“You have nothing to apologize for, Commander. Thank you for explaining it to me,” Selene reassured him.

**

On the other side of the dance floor, Alistair was stepping on Athena’s tiny feet, “Maybe we should just talk.”

Athena chuckled softly, “If that is what you would like to do.”

“Thank you for saving them. I wouldn’t have been able to survive this if I had lost Selene,” Alistair led her to a bench so they could sit.

“I think you’re giving yourself too little credit,” Athena responded.

“I’m not like your Commander. He has a strength in him few people have,” Alistair spoke with great admiration for Curly.

“He’s also incredibly kind. But I doubt you want to hear me talk about the Commander…” Athena trailed off.

Alistair chuckled, “You could go on about his virtues all night?” Athena nodded in answer, blushing slightly. Alistair continued talking, “Selene and I would like to name the baby you healed after you. We claimed her as our baby.”

“Why?” Athena was shocked and confused by this revelation.

“Because you saved her life,” Alistair smiled at her.

“I’m honored, but, please don’t feel as though you owe me anything. Your thanks and happiness are enough for me,” Athena requested. She was uncomfortable with this idea.

“That sounds like all the more reason,” Selene stated quietly. She noticed that they were sitting and couldn’t resist teasing her husband, “He was tramping on your feet?” Athena blushed not knowing what to say. Selene smiled at her, “It’s all right, he does it to me all the time. We wouldn’t want to use your first name, because that would be confusing. If you’re willing, we would love to use your middle name.”

“My middle name is Marie,” Athena stood to take Cullen’s hand.

“If you two don’t mind, I promised the Inquisitor a night of dancing,” Cullen cut in to take Athena back out on the dance floor. “Did he really step on your feet?”

“Yes,” Athena answered, “Something you have never done.”

“Are you saying I’m a better dancer than the king?” Cullen smiled seductively.

“I am,” Athena smiled at him. As the dance ended he bent down and kissed her. From the balcony we heard wails and sobbing, “Your admirers are at it again.”

“At least tonight they’re leaving me alone,” Cullen smiled at Athena.

Athena laughed, “You’re not giving them much of a choice.”

“And I don’t intend to,” Cullen was about to kiss her again when he saw Bull motioning for him. Sighing, he said, “Next time we’re finding a field of flowers to dance in.”

Athena couldn’t help but laugh at her love’s disgruntled tone, “I still can’t see him proposing here.” 

“That’s what he plans to do,” Cullen shrugged as they walked over to Bull.

“Hey Boss, you mind if the Commander and I talk privately?” 

“She knows,” Cullen didn’t want to release Athena.

“It’s all right. I want to talk to Leliana anyway,” Athena let go of Curly’s hand and walked in Nightingale’s direction. Morrigan caught up with her first, Athena smiled, “Hello.”

“You and the Commander are creating quite the stir tonight,” Morrigan smiled.

“If you mean because we are upsetting his admirers, then…” Athena paused and cocked her head to the side to look at Morrigan, “I guess we are.”

“And having the King of Fereldan tramp on your feet,” Morrigan grinned.

Athena fought back a chuckle, “He wasn’t that bad.”

“You are far too kind,” Morrigan had wonderment in her voice.

“When did you dance with him?” Athena asked.

“Never! Selene always complained about it though. She once asked me to change his shoes to bunny slippers that way they would at least be furry when they landed on her,” Morrigan explained.

Athena chuckled, “Did you?” 

“I thought about it…” Morrigan smiled wickedly and whispered, “but then I thought the temptation would be too great to turn him in to an actual bunny."

“Remind me to never get on your bad side,” Athena softly laughed.

Morrigan laughed, “You’re the first person in many years to call me friend. I would not jeopardize that. Does the Commander do anything that annoys you?”

“He does a great many things that annoy me,” Leliana chimed in as the two ladies reached her.

Athena shook her head at Nightingale, “Then it’s a good thing that you’re not in love with him. Neither one of us is perfect, I’m sure there are things that I do that annoy him.”

“But you’re the Herald of Andraste!” Morrigan mocked.

Athena laughed, “And somehow I’m still human and make mistakes. It’s a wonderful thing to have good people around you that don’t let the mistakes get out.”

In the comfortable silence they heard two young ladies talking, “I think that’s the one the Commander is going to marry.”

“No it can’t be...”

“I truly think that’s the Inquisitor.”

“But I heard she was maleficarum and never left Skyhold!”

“Do you really think a man like the Commander would fall for something like you’re describing?”

The second voice wailed, “I don’t stand a chance.”

The ladies looked at each other and laughed. Curly was finally free from talking with Bull and he hesitated as he walked over to the ladies, “Why are you laughing?”

“Apparently I’m maleficarum and I never leave Skyhold?” 

“Aye,” Morrigan answered, “your abilities are beyond compare to project your spirit such a distance.”

“Maker’s breath,” Cullen sighed in irritation.

Athena took the few steps over to him and kissed him, “My favorite part was when they complimented you,” She paused, “and the wailing… The wailing was very entertaining.”

Leliana and Morrigan chuckled. Cullen blushed, “They should have complimented you.”

“They did… Sort of,” Leliana remarked. Before she could explain further Bull had pulled Ruffles out on to the dance floor.

“Josephine’s mom approved?” Athena asked Cullen as they moved to the marble railing to watch.

“She did,” Cullen smiled at her.

“Lady Josephine Montilyet, I love you. Will you marry me?” Bull shouted. Josephine nodded, yes, and kissed him.

After Tiny and Ruffles left the dance floor, Empress Celene made an appearance, and the long list of introductions began. When it came to Athena’s turn, she waited to walk down with Cullen. To give the announcer credit he did announce that they were engaged. Crying could be heard through out the ball room. Athena was smiling as they walked down to stand in front of the Empress, Cullen whispered, “You didn’t have to wait for me.”

“I wanted to,” Athena smiled in to his brown eyes.

Standing in front of the Empress Athena asked, “How are you feeling, Your Highness?”

“We are well, Inquisitor,” Celene looked somewhere past Duchess and almost imperceptibly stroked her stomach.

As our lovers left the ballroom floor, Athena kept looking behind her at the Empress. Cullen noticed, “What’s wrong?”

“She looks like she’s ill,” Athena answered quietly.

“What do you mean?” Leliana met up with them.

“Maybe it’s the lighting but she’s incredibly pale. She’s holding herself very stiff, and she keeps touching her stomach,” Athena soft voice belied her bewilderment.

“I see I’m not the only one that noticed the oddities,” Morrigan smiled at Athena.

“What do you think?” Cullen sought Morrigan’s advice as she knew Celene better than any of them.

“I agree with your lady love, the Empress looks as though she is ill,” Morrigan watched Celene.

While they talked the introductions stopped and the Empress gave her speech, “We are pleased to announce that we are with child,” Celene rested her hands on her belly. “Tonight is a night of happy celebration! Please join us in celebrating the coming birth of our child!” Everyone applauded.

I walked over to where Cullen and Athena were standing, “Duchess, is she the real Empress?”

Athena shrugged helplessly, never taking her eyes off of Celene, “She looks as though she’s going to pass out.”

“Or become ill,” Morrigan quipped. “I find it odd that she would not mention the child’s father.”

“She wants the child to be solely hers so no one else can lay claim to the throne,” Athena sighed with disgust.

“For someone so caring, you certainly understand how the game of nobility and politics works,” Morrigan was shocked.

“I am nobility,” Athena paused, “At least, I was. Evelyn always talked of how one should marry or get with child from someone above one’s current position…. Even between the Mages at the circle, it wasn’t all that different. Marry for more power, or at least someone that can get you out of the circle, it was the same thought toward having children. Very few talked about marrying for love and those that did, well, they suffered for it.”

“They weren’t made tranquil for it?” Cullen was repulsed by what he was hearing, but knew all too well that Duchess spoke the truth.

“No, they suffered at the hands of some of the other Mages whose well laid plans were disrupted by a pesky thing called love,” Athena’s voice still had the hard edge of bitterness and contempt for these people.

“Why didn’t you tell the first enchanter?” Cullen was quite curious.

“And betray their trust? I was already non-existent because I was considered a favorite of the knight-commander and first enchanter. To tell on anyone, would have meant death or worse for the precious few that trusted me to heal their wounds…” Athena trailed off.

“Not to mention what it would have meant for you,” Morrigan reminded everyone that Athena was in just as much danger in the circle.

"The templars should have protected you,” Cullen was irritated with his former order.

“Which ones? The ones that Kern had paid? Or the ones that despised me because of my “favorite” status?” Athena asked.

“There should have at least been one Templar,” Cullen was frustrated with what she was telling him.

“There was, but he was only there for a couple weeks, and I didn’t see him without his helmet on until years later. So, I watched and listened, taking care of the few that trusted me or those that no one else would touch,” Athena smiled sadly at him.

“Had I known…” Cullen trailed off.

Athena kissed him, “I know.”

“I would like to hear more on this Kern,” Morrigan said, “but right now we have to solve the current mystery of Empress Celene. I’m going to speak with her.”

Athena watched Morrigan and Celene outside on the main balcony. Cullen wrapped his arms around her and she leaned back into him, sighing. He asked quietly, “What are you thinking?”

“That I love you,” Athena half smiled.

“Is that all?” Cullen smiled.

“Right now, it’s the only one that makes sense.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “I love you, too.”

Morrigan made a motion with her hand, but she wasn’t looking at Athena. Athena whispered, “Something’s wrong.”

Cullen released her only so far as her hand and they both walked to the balcony to see Morrigan catch Celene. They rushed onto the balcony and Athena ordered, “Lay her down.” 

Morrigan laid her down and Athena knelt beside the unconscious woman. She held her hand over Celene’s mouth and under her nose, feeling for breath, “Something is cutting off her air.”

Athena felt down Celene’s throat and felt nothing. She moved on to the Empress’s rib cage, “Cullen, do you have a dagger?”  
Cullen pulled a dagger from his belt and handed it to Duchess, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m not sure,” Athena cut open Celene’s dress, revealing her chest, ribs and belly tightly wrapped. Athena’s sharp intake of breath alarmed both Cullen and Morrigan. Athena whispered, “The wrap is too tight. I don’t think I can do this.”

“Then let me,” Cullen gently squeezed her shoulder. Athena handed the dagger to him. Cullen knelt down beside her and deftly cut the wrap. Celene took a sharp breath in.

Athena sighed in relief and then gasped when she saw how round the Empress’s belly was, “Oh no.”

Morrigan left them to dispel the crowd that was forming inside the ballroom, closing the door behind her, “The Inquisitor lost an earring and they have a personal value to her.”

“Do you think the baby’s injured?” Cullen asked quietly. He tamped down the urge to pull Athena away, and never look back.

“I don’t know,” Athena had tears in her eyes and held her hands above the Empresses belly to see if she could sense if the baby was hurt. “There’s something in the way.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know…” Athena heard Morrigan gasp, “Morrigan, there’s something in the way.”

Morrigan quickly used dispel on the prone Empress, only to see that it wasn’t the Empress at all. It was her lover, Briala. Morrigan whispered, “Briala?”

With the magic dispelled, Athena breathed a sigh of relief seeing that both had only been slightly harmed and could heal them easily. Which she did. 

Briala woke up coughing, “Where…?” She looked around, panicked and wrapped her arms around her rounded belly, “the baby.”

“You and the baby are fine.” Athena smiled at the elven woman, “Why are you pretending to be Celene?”

Briala glanced nervously around her, “The council of heralds couldn’t know anything was wrong.”

“What do you mean?” Morrigan stood imperiously over them.

“Before this continues we should find a more private location,” Curly, the voice of wisdom. (Personally, I think he wanted Duchess out of the chilly air.)

“Aye,” Morrigan and Athena helped Briala up. 

Athena stood after she was sure Briala was stable on her feet. Cullen held her back, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine,” Athena’s half smile wavered.

“No, you’re not.”

“Physically I am.” Athena tried to smile again to reassure him, it fell short of her eyes.

“Athena…”

Duchess kissed him. She appreciated that he was worried for her, “Now isn’t the time.”

They followed Briala and Morrigan, quickly catching up to them. Briala slowly led them to a small antechamber and sighed wearily as she sat on an antique chair. She waited until the door had closed behind Leliana to speak, “Celene needed an heir, but she feared she wouldn’t be able to have one so we planned that I become with child. When we announced to the council of heralds that an heir would be forthcoming, Celene started to receive death threats. So, we used charms for people of a similar body type to Celene to look like her.

“Two months ago, Celene and I were taken prisoner. I escaped and have tried to find out who would do this. I received this message shortly before I announced tonight’s ball.” Briala handed the note to Duchess.

Athena read it aloud, “Empress Celene, If you do not renounce your child as illegitimate I will have no other option than to kill your lover, Briala. Are you prepared to lose both mother and child?”

Briala had tears in her eyes, “I still don’t know who would do this.”

“Does Florianne still live?” Athena asked.

“Celene has been hesitant to execute her.” Briala softly grunted as her baby kicked her.

“Could she still have contact with those that helped her?” Leliana asked.

“It’s possible.”

“Is no one else concerned that the real Empress is missing?!” Morrigan was indignant.

“Whoever sent the note the Inquisitor is holding sent me another note right before you arrived. It says, “We’ll be attending your grand party. If you do anything other than what we tell you to, we’ll kill your lover.” Briala sighed.

“This is good, we can search the Winter Palace,” Leliana said.

Athena knelt down in front of Briala and gently took the note from her to give to Leliana. Her eyes never wavered from the weary elf’s face, “How far along are you?”

“I should be giving birth any day now,” Briala looked down at Duchess.

“Why hide it?” Athena wondered.

“It wasn’t public knowledge until tonight. I didn’t want to place additional targets on our backs. I love her, Inquisitor.” Briala’s tears overflowed.

“We’ll find her,” Athena promised and turned her attention to Nightingale, “Have a plan yet?”

Leliana smirked, “Truth magic.”

“That won’t work if they’re mages,” Athena warned.

“I had noticed a couple of people that were here last time, I think they work for Florianne. They did the last time we were here.” Leliana said.

“I think I know who you mean,” Morrigan and Leliana left to get their targets.

Athena got up to pace. She was worried about how stressful this was for Briala. She stopped when she heard Briala softly gasp, “Are you all right?”

“I have been having small contractions for the past week or so.” Briala tried to hold her tattered dress together.

Athena started to look for something to cover the elven woman when Cullen motioned for her to stop. As he passed Duchess he whispered, “Keep her talking.”

Athena nodded, “How far along is Celene?”

“You caught that, did you?” Briala half smiled. “She’s due in a couple weeks.”

“Was that planned?” 

“No. After Michel and I…” Briala shuddered a bit, “A Qunari mage showed up and promised that he could help Celene get with child. He was right.”

Cullen put a blanket he found around Briala’s shoulders and pulled Athena in for a hug, whispering, “I love you.”

Athena closed her eyes, fighting tears, and whispered, “I love you, too.”

The door burst open with Morrigan and Leliana bringing in the two people they recognized from Florianne’s entourage. Briala rose from her chair shaking with rage, “Where is the Empress?!”

Athena moved away from Curly and sent her magic into the air, making the air sparkle, “Answer her and we’ll know if your lying.”

The two stuttered and stammered until Morrigan sighed in extreme frustration, “Let me turn them into bugs.”

“S-she’s in the west wing,” They stammered, quaking in their boots.

Briala stalked to the door. Athena had the distinct impression that she wanted to run, but was afraid of what it would do to the baby. Athena turned to Cullen, “I have to go.”

“I’m coming with you,” Cullen quietly stated. 

“Are you certain, Commander? We know not what we will find,” Morrigan said.

"All the more reason that I should be there," Cullen replied, not taking his eyes from Athena’s.

“Take Varric or Bull with you,” Leliana took a hold of the prisoners.

“Varric, I hope you’re bored,” Athena came in to the ballroom with Briala and Cullen.

“I am, why?” I asked.

“Because we have to find the Empress,” Athena answered.

“Just let me know where to point Bianca,” I walked along.

Athena chuckled. Once we were out of the ballroom we quickened our pace but made sure to stick close to Briala. We heard yelling and opened doors to see if we could find the culprits. After what felt like the fiftieth door a scream rent the air. Morrigan and I took off at a run, as we closed in on the scream. Athena and Cullen kept close to Briala and heard her horrified whisper, “That was Celene.”

Morrigan and I tried to open the last door in the hall, but someone or something was blocking it. When Briala, Cullen, and Athena caught up with us, Cullen kicked the door open. We saw the Empress tied to the bed, fighting to get free, and Florianne holding a sword to Celene’s very pregnant belly. Athena whispered, “Please, no.” 

“Where are her bodyguards?” I asked.

“We need to get Celene out of there,” Morrigan ordered.

“Agreed,” Cullen responded.

“You will not touch her,” Florianne sneered, “You ruined our plans, Inquisitor, and you will pay.”

“From you? I think not,” Morrigan sneered right back.

“What were those plans?” Cullen wanted to keep her talking as he assessed how to get Celene out safely. He was certain Florianne had assassins hiding in the room.

“Wouldn’t you like to know, Commander,” Florianne tied the gag around Celene’s mouth tighter.

“If you want the Empress or her baby to survive, someone is going to have to remove her gag,” Athena said quietly. Celene’s eyes rolled back in to her head, passing out. Athena moved closer to the bed, “All I want to do is make sure that she or the baby survives while we talk. If she suffocates…”

“Why would she suffocate?” Florianne asked.

“Are you that much of a fool, Florianne?” Morrigan did not giving Florianne a chance to answer, “you tied the gag too tight!”

“Let me untie the gag, Florianne,” Athena pleaded moving slowly toward the bed, holding her right hand in a steady position, like she was holding a key.

“I will,” Florianne tried to move. When she found out that she couldn’t, she screeched, “What have you done to me?!”

“You’re not moving until Celene is out of here and safe,” Athena untied the Empress and checked her for injuries.

“Inquisitor?” Cullen asked, his worry plain for all to hear.

“She’s fine, except for not being able to breathe,” Athena responded with relief shading her voice. Celene coughed and moaned, slowly waking, “Empress Celene, it’s Inquisitor Trevelyan. We need to get you to safety.” Celene nodded in understanding, sitting up and getting off of the bed. She wobbled and Athena caught her, ordering Morrigan, “Morrigan, get her and Briala out of here.”

“Inquisitor, I doubt you need to hold Florianne in place.” Morrigan helped Celene to the door.

Athena looked at Morrigan doubtfully, “I don’t want her attacking anyone.”

“We could always tie her to the chair,” Cullen suggested.

“I am beginning to see why you love him,” Morrigan half smiled as she took Celene out to Briala and to safety.

“GUARDS!” Florianne screeched and her assassins came pouring out of their hiding places. We quickly dispatched her assassins. I enjoyed Florianne’s cry of frustration.

“Why aren’t you in jail?” Athena asked as Cullen tied Florianne to the chair.

“I was released,” Florianne huffed. She strained against her bonds.

“Why would you come back here?” 

“To kill Celene and Briala. The throne belongs to me!” Florianne screeched.

“And what of Celene’s baby?” Athena had to ask.

“I would claim it as my own. But you had to ruin my plans!” 

“Why claim Celene’s? Why not have one of your own?” Athena was disturbed by this.

“Have a little brat grow inside me? No, thank you,” Florianne sneered and laughed evilly, “Brigidh wasn’t what you thought she was.”

“What was she then?!” Athena was angry. Very angry. In fact, I had never seen her so angry.

“That doesn’t concern you,” she snarled.

“You will answer her,” Cullen menaced as he pulled a sword from only Andraste knows where and held it to Florianne’s throat.  
Florianne gulped, “Brigidh was one of my lovers.”

“That still doesn’t answer my question,” Athena looked like she wanted to kill Florianne. The only other time she had that look was when she sent Corypheus to the Fade.

“I’m not telling you. Once you leave I’ll find my way back to Celene kill her, the baby, and I will have my throne,” Florianne smirked, thinking she was clever.

“You’re going to die for that,” I warned quietly, my finger desperately itching to pull Bianca’s trigger and send a bolt right through her heart.

Athena had forgotten to take the magic cage off of Florianne when we tied her to the chair. She started closing her hand, not realizing it, “Desiring a child, having a child, should come from a place of love, not to be some pawn in a game.”

“But that is how the game is played, Inquisitor,” and then Florianne screamed in agony (I will admit to getting immense amusement out of that.)

“Inquisitor,” Cullen pulled the sword away from Florianne’s neck and walked over to Athena and whispered her name. When that didn’t work, he took hold of her wrist, “Let her go for now. You can deal with her later.”

Athena looked at him with tear filled eyes, and opened her hand to release Florianne. She left the room without a word. Cullen glanced at me to make sure I would keep watch over the prisoner, I pointed Bianca at Florianne, smirked, and told Curly to go. I had everything under control.

Cullen followed Athena out of the room and into the west wing gardens where she performed one of her releases and then collapsed to her hands and knees sobbing. Cullen sat beside her and pulled her into his arms and held her until the sobs had quieted to hiccups he whispered, “I love you.” He didn’t get a response because Athena was asleep. Curly stood with her in his arms and saw Morrigan watching them.

Morrigan tilted her head and said quietly, “Celene wants to talk to her…”

“Is she injured?” Cullen asked barely above a whisper, praying that this would be a peaceful sleep for the woman he loved.

“No,” Morrigan answered, “I did not think fighting Florianne would upset her this much.”

“Then the Empress can wait until she wakes. Florianne said that she planned to kill Celene, her baby, and the demon that attacked the king and queen of Fereldan was one of her lovers…” Cullen sighed in agitation.

“Florianne still lives?” She questioned with a calculating tone of voice.

“For now,” Cullen said with anger on the edges of his low voice.

“Athena wanted to kill her?” Morrigan raised a finely arched eyebrow as they walked through the garden.

“She was killing her,” Cullen stated.

“Why did you stop her?” Morrigan was surprised that he would stop Duchess from doing anything. Walkin beside Curly, they entered the palace.

"I don’t think Athena realized what she was doing,” Cullen responded.

“You have issue with her killing?” Morrigan was trying to make sense of this, but the knowledge seemed to be just out of reach and for a man to be this confounding, well… She didn’t like it.

“No, I have issue with Athena suffering, and she would never forgive herself if she killed someone unintentionally. No matter how much they deserved it,” Cullen was getting a wee bit irritated.

“She’s hurt people before without intending to hurt them,” Morrigan was beginning to understand that this had to do with something in Duchess’ past.

“They deserved it, but she had a difficult time seeing it that way,” Cullen explained.

They walked the rest of the way back to their chambers quietly. As they neared Curly and Duchess’s room, Morrigan almost whispered, “I hope she sleeps peacefully tonight, Commander.”

“Thank you. Goodnight, Morrigan,” Cullen closed the door with his foot.

**

Athena woke hours before sunrise, she sat up, shivering because of the nightmare she had, and looked down at a peacefully sleeping Cullen. Caressing a lock of hair that had fallen to cover his forehead she half smiled and gingerly got out of bed. She put on her shoes and left the room. Making her way to the garden she chose the farthest bench from the Palace and sat on it. Athena sat there for a while until she heard a voice, “For one so exhausted, should you not still be sleeping?”

“If I could, I would be gladly sleeping off the day,” Athena responded.

"Oh?” Morrigan sat beside her.

“Nightmares,” Athena looked at the moon.

“Care to voice them?” 

"No," Athena closed her eyes.

“You cannot keep everything inside, Athena,” Morrigan softly reprimanded.

“I don’t,” Athena opened her eyes and looked at Morrigan.

“No? You are a Mage, you understand more than most that dreams have some basis in reality, or at the very least a release for our fears,” Morrigan responded.

Athena sighed, “I dreamed that I had lost mine and Cullen’s baby because of the anchor and that so long as I had it, no matter what we tried would end in the same result,” Athena stopped, fighting tears.

“The anchor doesn’t have that kind of power, and even if it did, you would be the one to control it,” Morrigan tried to reassure her.

Athena sighed, not wanting to discuss it further, and changed the subject, “I wanted to kill her, Morrigan...”

“Your Commander thought you didn’t know what you were doing.”

“Maybe not at first, but I realized it when she screamed. It had nothing to do with saving the world from a menace… it had everything to do with that she wanted to kill a baby before it was born… And I can’t even remain pregnant…” Athena looked away from her friend, tears threatening to spill over.

Morrigan waited until she felt Athena was ready for what she had to say, “That you have been able to get pregnant at all this soon is unusual.”

“What does that mean?” Athena was not certain that she was going to like where this was going.

“It’s been over ten years and Selene has just become able to get with child. Hawke and Anders have yet to… That is if they desire children. For Celene there was no reason for her to not become with child, but couldn’t until recently, despite my efforts… In recent years you have had ancient eleven magicks make themselves part of you, you were physically in the Fade twice, and fought an ancient dark spawn Tevinter magister… Give yourself time, and you will have what you desire,” Morrigan explained.

"I didn't know that one of your abilities was fore sight,” Athena quipped.

“Tis not, but the voices talk to me still, and I listen. Why do you take magic into yourself?” Morrigan inquired.

“I don’t understand…”

“When you heal, you draw the injury in to yourself, why?”

“Because that’s how it works for me,” Athena shrugged.

“No one ever taught you differently?” Morrigan was incredulous.

“And where would I have learned that?” Athena wasn’t enjoying this line of questioning either.

“Most circle mages have a passing knowledge on how to keep their powers from harming themselves,” Morrigan griped, her disdain for circle mages obvious.

Athena laughed without humor, “I was told that those types of things were too far advanced for me or I would have to use lyrium or blood.”

“No interest in either?”

“No.” Athena emphatically stated.

“Perhaps we will return to Skyhold…” Morrigan murmured.

“Because I don’t use lyrium or blood?” Athena chuckled.

Morrigan smiled at her, “No, because you are an exceptional Mage who shouldn’t be injured by her powers.”

“And you can teach me,” Athena guessed, but it was more of a statement.

“If that is what you desire,” Morrigan stood, “I am going to return to bed. You should do the same.”

“In a couple minutes,” Athena returned to looking at the moon.

Morrigan shook her head as she passed Cullen standing well within earshot. Cullen nodded and went to Athena to sit beside her. Athena looked up at him, “You were sleeping.”

"And you weren't,” Cullen caressed her cheek.

“I’m sorry,” Athena looked down at her hands, fighting tears.

"What are you apologizing for?” Cullen took her chin in his fingers and lifted so he could gaze in to her tear filled eyes.

Athena blushed, “Everything… Nothing… I’m not sure.”

Cullen chuckled, “Interested in trying to sleep again?”

“No,” She shook her head, adamant about not returning to sleep.

“Is it the dream or what you wanted to do to Florianne?” Cullen was hoping to get more out of her than Morrigan did.

“Both. How did you…” Athena paused, as she changed her mind, “Never mind.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “The only reason I stopped you from killing Florianne was because…”

“Cullen, you were right to stop me. I shouldn’t have wanted to kill her… At least not for the reasons I had-” Athena was interrupted.

"Your reasons for wanting her dead are sound ones. No one should wish death upon a baby,” He said softly, taking both of her hands in his.

“But that wasn’t the only reason,” Athena looked down at their entwined hands.

"Athena," Cullen waited for her to look at him, “I want her dead, too. My only reason for desiring that is because she is a threat to you.”

She sighed resting her head on his shoulder, “This trip was supposed to be easy.”

Cullen kissed the top of her head, “I know. Hopefully it will get easier now.”

Athena shivered from the cold, “I should help Leliana with the interrogations.”

“Let’s go inside,” Cullen stood and pulled Athena to her feet, “the interrogations can wait until the sun is up. We should at least try and get some rest before then.”

Athena stood on tiptoe to kiss him and said, “Thank you.”

Cullen smiled at her in answer and they walked back to their room holding hands. Once there they made love and drifted off to sleep after whispering “I love you,” to each other.


	36. Chapter 36

We all met for lunch (because Curly and Duchess slept through breakfast.) Athena hugged Ruffles, “Congratulations,” before sitting down.

“Thank you,” she beamed, “You two could have told me.”

Athena threw her hands up, “I didn’t know until right before the ball.”

“And you had nothing to do with my mother coming here?” Josephine asked.

Athena looked at Nightingale, they both looked at Bull and said together, “His idea.”

“Thanks ladies… but the Commander was the one that suggested it,” Bull grinned unrepentantly.

“I suggested it?” Cullen was startled by this admission.

“You said that you asked the boss’s father before you proposed.”

“Just because I told you what I did didn’t mean that you had to,” Cullen took hold of Athena’s hand.

“Would you have said yes if I hadn’t received your mother’s approval?” Bull raised an eyebrow at his Kadan.

“Don’t answer that,” Leliana was quick to warn her friend.

Ruffles chuckled having no intention of answering him, “Bull, I love you.”

“That’s not an answer,” Bull griped. Josephine kissed him, causing all of us to applaud. Ruffles turned bright red.

Cullen softly spoke to Athena, “For once it’s not for us.”

Athena chuckled and I quipped, “Don’t worry, Curly, we still have plans for you.”

“We?” Curly looked at Duchess.

“No, they don’t tell me of their pranks on you anymore,” Athena answered.

“You took all the fun out of it by getting engaged,” I complained.

Athena laughed. Cullen smiled because that’s just the effect her laugh has one everyone, “Why does that matter?”

“Because she’ll tell you now,” I grumbled.

Cullen smirked, “She would warn me long before we got engaged.”

“Duchess, I’m disappointed,” I sighed.

“You mean you weren’t telling me about the pranks so I would talk to him?” Athena questioned.

“No!” I exclaimed, “We had already given you suggestions on that.”

“Walking through the barracks with just a blanket on is not a suggestion to entice talking,” Athena responded indignantly.

“No, it was meant to entice something far more… Active,” I smirked.

“Maker’s breath,” Curly swore, causing a chuckle from the rest of us.

“When did this “suggestion” happen?” Ruffles inquired, holding hands with her love.

“The night Sera burned down my tent,” Athena grumbled.

“And I thought you, Morrigan, and Leliana were bad with your bickering,” Selene joined us and sat down between Bull and her husband.

“Leliana and I always got along. Morrigan always looked at me like she wanted to turn me in to something,” Alistair said.

Athena bit her lip to hide her chuckle, “I should go check on The Empress.”

“Inquisitor, she has healers and midwives of her own,” Leliana remarked.

“I still need to talk to her."

“Duchess, give yourself the day,” I quietly ordered my friend.

“Apparently we missed a lot last night,” Alistair quipped to his wife.

Athena looked at Cullen. He responded, “I agree with Varric.”

Athena sighed, sounding frustrated, “The faster we get this mess sorted, the faster we can get back to Skyhold.”

While Curly, Leliana, and I were arguing with Athena, Ruffles was catching up the royals on all that transpired during the night. Leliana ordered, “Take the day. Everything can wait until the morrow.”

“Why do I get the impression that you three have planned something?” Athena looked between me, Curly, and Nightingale.

“We didn’t plan anything,” Leliana responded with an innocent expression.

“Yes, you did,” I couldn’t contain my chuckle. I knew Athena would love her “surprise.”

“Isn’t it Kieran’s name-day today?” Cullen asked, he knew he wasn’t right, but didn’t want to give away what he had set in motion.

“No, his is a month from today,” Athena responded. Alistair looked away at Athena’s answer, knowing her answer caused him pain she said, “I’m sorry, Your Majesty.”

“It’s all right, Inquisitor,” Alistair smiled at her.

“How is it that you can keep track of every kids’ name-day but you forget to mention yours?” I questioned.

“I write them down,” Athena smiled, “and mine was celebrated this year. You have one coming up soon too, Varric.”

“I never told you when my name day was,” I was flabbergasted, and wanted to know who to kill.

Athena shook her head and grinned, “You probably shouldn’t mention it in the “about the author” part of your books if you don’t want people to know.”

I blushed, “Damn publishers.”

Athena laughed and told Curly, “I’m still waiting on an answer...”

“I think it would be better to show you,” Cullen stood and reached out a hand for Duchess to take.

Athena sighed, taking his hand, “You’re lucky I love you.” 

**

Morrigan and Kieran were in the front garden of the palace when Athena and Cullen joined them. Morrigan smiled upon seeing them, Kieran was watching the gate anxiously. Athena asked, “Who is he waiting for?”

Morrigan looked at Cullen with an unasked question. Cullen answered, “I thought it would be better for Athena to see for herself.”

“Ah,” Morrigan paused, “He’s waiting for a friend.”

Alistair and Selene came out next. Selene pulled Morrigan aside to talk giving the baby to a very surprised Alistair who almost dropped her. Cullen noticed and reached out a hand, Alistair’s expression was one of eternal gratitude. Cullen chuckled softly, which drew Athena’s attention, “Cullen?”

“I think Kieran’s excitement is wearing off on you,” he smiled at her, she smiled in return still thinking back if Kieran had mentioned other friends besides Tommy. When the gates opened Kieran took off at a run causing the adults to chuckle.

Tommy and Kieran came running back through the gates. Tommy shouted, “Athena!” And ran to her. Athena opened her arms wide and crouched down to receive him. Tommy knocked her over. 

Athena and Tommy were laughing as they made it to sitting positions, “You used to not be able to knock me over.”

Tommy smiled at her, “Thank you for my name day present.”

“You’re welcome. Are you happy?” Athena smiled as she looked the boy over. She could not believe how tall he had become.

“Very. We live near the palace now. My mom even works for the Empress,” Tommy answered.

“I’m glad to hear it. I think Kieran is very excited to see you...” Athena hugged him when they returned to their feet, “go play.” Athena walked over to Cullen and took hold of his hand. Looking up at him and smiling she asked, “Is this your doing?”

“Mother Giselle had told me that they were living near here. I’m surprised that he didn’t say anything in his letters to you,” Cullen sort of answered.

Athena chuckled, “His letters were mostly of him drawing things,” she paused to kiss him, “and you still haven’t answered my question.”

“We had been talking about it… But…” Cullen trailed off, not wanting to bring up the loss of their baby and ruin what he hoped would be a relaxing and fun day for our heroine.

Athena whispered, “Thank you,” and kissed him for a very long time. 

So long, in fact, that two very busy boys noticed and simultaneously said, “Ewwwwww!” Causing everyone to laugh and our lovers to blush.

“Go back to playing you two,” Duchess told them in mock sternness.

“Why do you think adults do that?” Kieran asked.

“I don’t know… My mom always says because it shows you love the person. She also says it’s fun,” Tommy answered as the two started climbing the fountain (this particular garden didn’t have trees.) 

“My mom doesn’t do that stuff. But the Commander and Inquisitor are always holding hands and kissing,” Kieran explained.

I chuckled, “Out of the mouths of babes.”

Athena and Cullen looked at each other and even though blushing laughed at the conversation the two boys were having. Morrigan and Selene were getting loud and Alistiar asked as he handed over the baby, “Inquisitor, would you mind holding her, please?”

Athena smiled at him and took the baby from him. Little Marie was awake and cooing. Athena pulled the blanket down from her face and Marie grabbed hold of Athena’s pinky and thumb with both of her hands and tried to shove Duchess’s hand in her mouth. Athena chuckled softly.

Cullen watched Athena make faces at the baby for several minutes wishing that the scene before him was in the near future instead of just a wish. Fighting past the large lump in his throat he stood behind Duchess and placed his hands on her shoulders, smiling down at the baby. I turned my attention to the two boys that were running around without a care in the world before the lump in my throat got the best of me…

**

Morrigan and Selene’s argument continued through dinner. Athena had to ask the King, “What are they arguing about?”

“They’re making up for over a decade of not talking to each other,” Alistair grumbled.

“In the circle there were twin mages, they constantly fought with each other about whose powers were better, who learned things faster, who got to help the first enchanter… Morrigan and the Queen remind me of them,” Athena was loud enough for the two combatants to hear, getting a blush out of the Queen.

“Inquisitor, kindly stay out of it,” Morrigan sniped. 

Athena laughed. Alistair, shocked, “That’s not an insult!”

“I do not insult my friends,” Morrigan responded imperially as she sat down beside Athena.

“Since when?” Alistair was confounded.

“Kieran has changed me in more ways than one,” Morrigan softly replied.

“Children have that affect,” Selene spoke, just as soft, smiling at Alistair.

“Are you two calling a truce?” Alistair asked.

“At least for dinner,” Selene teased.

“Where is Leliana?” Morrigan inquired.

“I saw her heading off with one of the Inquisition soldiers,” Selene smiled wickedly. Causing Athena to chuckle.

“Your friends need to stop courting my soldiers,” Cullen remarked to Athena.

Athena gasped, “That is not my fault. The Commander of the Inquisition set the example.” Selene tried to hide a chuckle, Morrigan out right laughed, and Alistair’s mouth dropped open. Athena continued, “You could have said no to me at any time. I would have been heartbroken but you could have… In fact, you did say no to me…”

“That was over dancing! And it was an accident!” Cullen was incredulous.

“You practically threw Dorian and Darius together. I told you and him that I was not a matchmaker,” Athena reminded him.

“That doesn’t explain Rylen or Leliana's beau,” Cullen griped, teasing.

“For a while I thought Cassandra and Bull were going to start courting. Rylen was just as much of a shock to me,” Athena argued.

“You’ve lost, Commander,” Alistair chuckled.

“Have I?” Cullen winked at Alistair before kissing Athena.

Athena’s violet eyes lit with mischief, “Varric, would you be up for a game of Wicked Grace?”

“Always, Duchess,” I laughed.

“Woman,” Cullen growled. 

Athena winked at him, “At least Josie isn’t here.”

“I am very sorry to interrupt… The Empress wishes an audience with the Inquisitor and the Lady Morrigan,” one of Celene’s servants said.

“Would she like to join us here?” Athena picked up her fork as the plates were being handed out as the servant started speaking.

“She is… Indisposed, and requests that you come to her,” the servant answered.

“Is she ill?” Cullen inquired as Athena sighed and put down her fork.

“I cannot say any more on the matter, Commander.”

“We’ll go,” Athena responded quietly and stood. Morrigan joined her. Cullen stood as well.

“The invitation was only for Lady Morrigan and the Inquisitor,” the servant responded to Cullen’s standing.

“And it is my duty and honor to make certain the Inquisitor is protected at all times,” Cullen told the servant in a voice that would not tolerate any arguments. The servant bowed and showed them the way to the Empress’s chambers.

The Empress was laying in a large and ornate bed with a blue nightshift on when our trio was shown in. Briala was holding Celene’s hand and tears streamed down her face. Celene’s servants and healers were huddled in a corner, one of them spoke up, “She is in too much pain. We fear she will lose the baby.”

“How far along is she?” Athena walked over to the bed and was surprised to find Briala’s hand reaching out for hers. She gently squeezed the elf’s hand.

“She is almost thirty seven weeks,” one of the healers answered.

Celene opened her pale blue eyes and whispered, “Inquisitor, is Morrigan with you?” 

“She is,” Athena responded quietly, recognizing the symptoms of lyrium withdrawal.

“What do you need Celene?” Morrigan stood on the other side of the large bed.

“Dismiss our staff, please,” Celene pushed herself up to a sitting position on the bed and rested her free hand in front of her belly. Morrigan did as she asked.

Athena gently sat on the bed while Cullen moved to the far side of the room, when the door closed, she inquired, “You were taking lyrium?”

“Florianne forced her to,” Briala rasped out.

Celene fought tears, “We cannot lose this child.”

“Where are you feeling pain?” Athena asked.

“At the moment every where…” She whispered.

“Are any pains sharper than the others? Especially around your belly and back?” Athena wanted to be certain that Celene was not in active labor.

“The sharp pains like you are describing happen about once an hour and last for a couple minutes,” Celene shifted uncomfortably.

“Are you having them now? How long have you been having these pains?”

“If these pains stay true to their nature, one should not set upon us for another half hour. They started shortly after breaking our fast,” She whispered.

“I can take away the pain of the lyrium withdrawal, if you would like. I cannot guarantee that the pain won’t come back…” Athena softly informed.

“Please do so,” Celene closed her eyes. Athena used her magic to take away the pain of the withdrawal symptoms. Celene sighed in relief, “Thank you.”

“Were you taking lyrium while I was here, Celene?” Morrigan raised an eyebrow at the Empress.

“Once deemed Empress, we started immediately trying for a child. We also had suggestions from many different people on what would work the best. Taking lyrium was said to be the easiest and quickest course of action,” Celene explained.

Athena looked over at Cullen who was pacing, “Excuse me.” And she walked over to him. 

Curly didn’t see her and practically ran her over, “I’m sorry.”

Athena chuckled softly, “I understand if you want to go.”

“You’re going to see them through this aren’t you?” He took hold of one of her hands, thinking she was the kindest and most selfless woman he had ever met.

“If they’ll allow me,” Athena paused, searching his brown eyes because she noticed a wariness there, “this is going to take a while…”

“What do you mean?” He couldn’t help wondering what this was going to cost Athena.

“Her labor pains just started, and because of the lyrium withdrawal pain I doubt that she’s been out of bed all day. Briala’s hiding it well, but she’s in labor too. It is possible for this to take days,” Athena explained quietly.

“I guess I should have brought a book,” Cullen teased lightly. Athena chuckled and lightly kissed him.

Morrigan and Celene had been talking about renovations on the Winter Palace until Celene gasped and held her breath. Athena raised an eyebrow at Cullen and murmured, “Here we go again,” and then louder so they could hear her across the room, “Empress and Briala, you need to breathe. Let your breath go slowly and it will ease the pain of the contraction.”

“You know?” Briala thought she had been hiding her pain well.

Athena gently smiled, “Your hand tightened on mine and I heard you lightly gasp.”

Celene did as Athena commanded and when the contraction had passed, she informed them, “The servants and healers only know that I am with child… The plan was to claim Briala’s child as my heir. Inquisitor, will you stay?”

Cullen unsuccessfully hid his rueful smile. Athena shook her head at him, “And now you’ll have two heirs. I’ll stay, on one condition…”

“And that would be?” Celene was a bit wary, but also realized she was in no condition to refuse Duchess anything.

“That you do everything I say to do,” Athena walked back over to the bed and Cullen followed her.

“Agreed, Inquisitor,” Celene answered as she rubbed her belly because the baby had kicked her.

“My first rule is that there will be no titles…” Athena trailed off noticing marks on Celene’s wrist. Morrigan chuckled at Athena’s first decree as Duchess reached over and grabbed Celene’s other hand, “I thought you were uninjured…”

Celene blushed, “Those are not from what Florianne did…”

“Oh,” Athena blushed.

Morrigan chuckled again, “Oh Celene… do you still have the cream I made for you?”

“I do,” Celene futilely tried to get off the bed by herself, until Morrigan and Athena assisted. Celene walked over to her gilt armoire and opened it to pull out a glass bottle holding a grayish cream, “my healers told me it could harm the baby, so I have not been using it.”

“I instead of we…?” Morrigan sounded surprised, “Everything I made would not have hurt you or a baby. Had I known you were taking lyrium…”

“If there are to be no titles, then there is no reason for “we”,” Celene replied as she rubbed the cream in to her injured skin, “Had I known that it was the lyrium causing the miscarriages, I would have stopped long ago.”

“Lyrium doesn’t cause miscarriages,” Morrigan argued. 

“Morrigan, I was drinking it like one would drink wine,” Celene sat on the edge of the bed, breathless from the short walk.

“Every time you had a glass of wine, you had lyrium in it?” Morrigan raised an eyebrow.

“How often was that?” Athena finished checking on Briala and watched the Empress struggle to catch her breath, which she found worrisome.

“When I was here at least three times a day,” Morrigan responded and walked over to the doors that led to Celene’s personal garden and opened them.

“How often do you two go for walks?” Athena tried to think of a way to get the Empress and Briala moving.

“Until recently, I walked daily,” Briala said quietly.

"My healers said that walking would do more harm because of the pain I was in. They told me that staying in bed would be best for both of us,” She answered after catching her breath.

“You need new healers,” Cullen quietly scoffed at the notion.

“And who are you to decide that?” Celene asked indignantly.

“I was a Templar, and I know how hard it is to break away from lyrium,” Cullen was calm but firm. He was absolutely certain that he did not want to go into details.

“He’s right, Celene,” Morrigan interjected in a conciliatory tone, not wanting to stress Celene further. Morrigan could already tell that her labor was going to be a difficult one. Briala seemed to be handling it better.

Celene sighed as she arched her back and pushed with both hands against her lower back, “Decent healers are hard to come by when one is Empress.”

“I think they’re more afraid of what you would do to them if they disagreed with you,” Athena spoke with understanding.

“It sounds as though you have similar issues,” Celene smiled at her.

“In a way… I remember sending Florianne to a chantry to spend the rest of her life. Why did she return?” Athena changed the subject, not wanting to get in to the details of healers.

“She had written to me begging forgiveness and that she was afraid…” Celene sighed, knowing that she had been taken for a fool.

“Where are the ones that got you with child?” Morrigan found it odd that neither Michel or the Qunari stayed behind to protect them.

“They had business to attend to in Val Royeaux. They should be returning in a day or two,” Celene breathed deeply as she arched her back to stretch the building tightness from it.

“Would you like to go for a walk?” Athena saw the Empress becoming increasingly uncomfortable and thought it would be best to get her moving. Athena also tilted her head to indicate Briala should join them, but Briala shook her head.

“I would love to, but…” Celene trailed off, worried that her healers had been right and that she would harm her child by moving too much.

“Walking around your garden will not harm you or the baby. It may even ease the pressure in your back and the breathing issues you’re having,” Athena explained.

“How did you know?” Celene was surprised that Duchess had noticed so much. Celene had thought she had been doing very well at hiding her discomfort. 

“She’s very observant,” Cullen quipped as he smiled at his fiancee.

Celene gave a short bark of laughter and winced, rubbing her belly, “Let’s go.”

“Celene,” Athena waited for the empress to look at her, “wait until the contraction passes.”

"You wouldn't happen to have a chess set in here, would you?" Cullen needed something to do if he was going to help Athena.

“Cullen!” Athena thought he was going to try to teach her again. That was not something she wanted to have happen in front of Celene or anyone but Cullen for that matter.

"We're going to need something to do besides walking the garden to pass the time," Cullen explained.

“It’s on the top shelf of the armoire,” Celene gasped out.

“Breathe,” Morrigan chided. Celene half smiled and exhaled.

Celene stood once the contraction had passed and held out her hand to Briala, “though I prefer wicked grace myself.”

Briala awkwardly stood to kiss Celene and whispered, “It’s best if I stay here.”

“Of course she would,” Cullen whispered ruefully. 

Athena heard him and chuckled, “Morrigan, would you mind walking with Celene? We’ll be along in a minute.”

“Not at all,” Morrigan and Celene walked slowly out into the garden as the moon peeked over the horizon.

“What are you doing?” Cullen asked as Athena went to the door.

“Having someone get Varric.”

“Why?” 

"You didn't notice that when you got Celene to laugh it brought on a contraction?" Athena answered his question with a question. She also didn’t want to leave Briala alone. (Thanks, Duchess.)

“No,” Cullen worried, “is this something that should be rushed?”

“Getting someone to laugh or distract them is not “rushing” the labor, it just helps in moving things along.” Athena smiled and peeked her head out the door, “Can you bring Varric Tethras here, please? The Empress would like to hear one of his stories.”

“At once, Inquisitor,” the guard saluted and was on his way. Athena closed the door and turned to face Cullen.

Cullen cornered her against the door and kissed her, “You’re amazing.”

“Remind me of that tomorrow morning when I’ve had no sleep,” She thoroughly enjoyed his kisses.

“I think I can manage that,” Cullen released her to take her hand and walk out in to the garden to find the Empress and Morrigan. After Athena checked on Briala again.

“This is… larger than I thought…” Athena looked around her in shock. The “private” garden was larger than the front garden that everyone goes through to get to the palace. She was worried that they would be unable to find Morrigan or Celene.

“We’ll find them,” Cullen reassured her as they turned to the right and walked by small bushes with flowers that looked like butterflies on them.

“Morrigan…” Celene was panting as she heavily sat on the nearest bench. The bench was situated under an arch that was filled with flowers that only bloomed at night.

“Celene, we haven’t been in here for five minutes,” Morrigan turned to face her, very irritated.

“You aren’t with child,” Celene snapped, holding onto the bench and arching her back as she fought a groan. The pressure in her back had only intensified.

“Not presently, but I have been,” Morrigan sat beside her.

"I told you we’d find them,” Cullen said as he and Athena walked up behind Morrigan and Celene.

“Celene?” Athena noted the dark circles under the laboring woman’s eyes. Cullen was right, it didn’t take long to find them and that worried her even more.

“I haven’t been able to sleep since you rescued me,” Celene quietly confessed, laying an arm on the top of her belly which was promptly kicked by the baby.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Morrigan asked.

“Does it matter?” Celene grumped, irritated that her back was not getting better.

Athena chuckled, “It matters a lot. Was there a reason you couldn’t sleep?” 

"I woke up every hour with a tightness in my back and I was unable to find a comfortable position,” Celene stood, ready to continue now that she could breathe again.

Athena smiled, “Your labor started while you were sleeping last night.”

“Did being held captive bring it on?” Celene was, understandably, worried.

“I don’t know,” Athena answered.

"I doubt that, Celene,” Morrigan responded.

"The healers said that if I were to go in to labor now there was a possibility the baby wouldn’t survive,” the Empress was distressed by this and wrapped protective arms around her distended middle as they made their way back to her room.

“Your healers are idiots,” Morrigan grumbled, “I had Kieran by myself and he’s perfectly healthy.”

“Athena?” Celene looked for confirmation. As much as she trusted Morrigan, Morrigan was a mage, and if Kieran had been in danger, she could have saved him.

“I’ve delivered healthy babies earlier than thirty-six weeks and have lost mothers and babies at full term. What worries me most is that the baby is half Qunari and the only Qunari I know is the Iron Bull…” Athena paused seeing the stricken look on Celene’s face and reassured her, “Every pregnancy is different, some babies are born early, others seem to take forever. I can check to see if everything is normal according to what I know?”

“Please do,” Celene sat on the bed. 

“I’m going to need you to lay down,” Athena helped her gain access to more of the bed. Athena did her thing and said, “Everything looks like it is progressing the way it should.”

“Thank the Maker,” Celene breathed, and then there was a knock on the door. Celene groaned, “I cannot be left alone even though I paid to have several imposters of me running around.”

“I don’t think it’s that...” Cullen went to answer the door and there I stood, with the King and Queen of Fereldan behind me. Curly opened the door wide for all of us to come in.

"Don't you have a baby to take care of," Morrigan shot at Selene as everyone but Athena took a seat at the far side of the room.

“She’s sleeping. And I have yet to see the Inquisitor do her thing,” Selene was quick to respond.

Athena sighed as she walked away from the Empress, “One of my rules until this is over is that there will be no titles, and I hope you are all prepared for a very long night.”

“Why would it be a long night?” Selene asked.

“Because Celene and Briala’s water has yet to break,” Athena softly informed them, looking over at the two to see that they were sleeping.

“I may have to leave at some point,” Selene was quiet, looking at what Athena was seeing.

“They’re worse than you,” Cullen whispered to Duchess as he pulled her down on his lap.

Athena gasped, “They’ve been in labor. I think they deserve some rest, and I have never fallen asleep with people being as noisy as we were.”

“No, just walking down the stairs,” Cullen teased.

“You yelled at Leliana and I for it. Does Selene get the same?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him.

“What’s this?” Selene was confused as to why her name was being brought into their lovers’ spat.

“The morning you met Athena, she had been up all night, and she fell asleep walking down the stairs,” Cullen griped. The memory did not sit well with him.

“I did not! I remember saying hi to Dorian,” Athena blushed.

“Why were you up all night?” Morrigan was curious to find out what would keep her friend up all night.

“Because we got back from the Emerald Graves late. And I ended up talking to people until after the sun rose,” Athena blushed more.

“Cullen, Leliana, and I?” Selene asked.

"Yes, and in that order too..." Athena chuckled.

“Ah, yes, the pacing at the gate. He was almost as annoying as Alistair when you would leave him behind,” Morrigan remarked to Selene.

“I most certainly was not!” Alistair exclaimed louder than intended which had Athena shushing him. He blushed and Morrigan chuckled.

“You would bark and argue with the dog! When you lost that argument, you would pace in circles. One time the circling was so bad that if I had had water we could have made a moat around our camp! And then you would come talk to me!” Morrigan listed her grievances with indignation.

“And then you would threaten to change me in to something,” Alistair griped.

“Where was Leliana during all this?” Athena inquired as this was a story Leliana had never told her.

“With Selene,” Alistair grumbled.

Athena chuckled and heard Celene or Briala softly moan. She looked over to see if she was needed and saw that they were still sound asleep. Celene had slid down on the mountain of pillows behind her with one arm propping her up and her head almost resting on her shoulder. Her other arm laying across her belly. I said, “That can’t be comfortable.”

“Never move a pregnant woman when she’s sleeping,” Alistair warned us.

“The voice of experience speaks,” Selene teased.

“How would he know?” Morrigan wondered.

“Because he woke me last nighty moving me,” Selene smiled happily.

“Congratulations,” Athena quietly remarked.

“When did you find out?” Cullen asked as he held Athena a little tighter.

“The day before we left Denerim,” Alistair beamed so much that you could have thought that he was the one expecting instead of his queen.

“Leliana had said that you had told her you wouldn’t be here?” Athena tried not to show how much the news hurt.

“I had been ill and we weren’t sure if I would be well enough to travel,” Selene answered.

"You seem perfectly healthy now. What did you do to him?" Morrigan wanted to know the salacious details.

“Sparks went flying… And I was blasted out of the bed…” Alistair blushed. 

Morrigan laughed, “Did you blast the bed apart too?”

“No, beds are made of sturdier stuff than cots,” Selene blushed slightly.

“Good to know Curly and Duchess aren’t the only ones that break cots,” I teased.

“Dwarf!” Curly warned. 

I chuckled, “What do we do until the royal couple wakes?”

Athena was looking out at the stars through the open door lost deep in her own thoughts. Cullen softly spoke to get her attention, “Athena?”

“Yes?” She looked at him like she just woke up. 

“What were you thinking of?” His voice was barely above a whisper, in answer she smiled sadly at him. Cullen kissed her and whispered, “I love you.”

Selene looked to Morrigan for an explanation. Morrigan shook her head, not willing to divulge anything that would jeopardize her friendship. And then someone in their infinite wisdom, started pounding on the door. Morrigan growled, “I’m going to turn them in to the most disgusting, smallest thing I can think of and squish them.”

Waking, Celene groaned from the awkward sleeping position she had fallen into. Cullen released Athena so she could assist the Empress in getting to a more comfortable position and checked on a still sleeping Briala.

The servant tried to push past Morrigan, “I must see the Empress right away!”

“Before you see anyone, you will tell me why you are here,” Morrigan said imperially.

“The Council of Heralds said they need to speak with her right away!” The servant squeaked out. 

“Laetan, hear us when we say that we will talk with the Council Of Heralds as it pleases us. We are in need of rest, please do not come to this door for the next few days,” Celene responded loud and clear until the end were she fought a groan as a contraction hit.

“Yes, Your Majesty,” the servant bowed and Morrigan shut the door in his face. Causing everyone in the room to chuckle.

“Thank you for not letting him see me,” Celene said to Morrigan, gripping the sheets.

“I never liked him anyway,” Morrigan grinned. Celene chuckled and winced.

"Laetan has his uses,” Celene shifted around to find a comfortable position.

“Aye, he does. Supreme among those uses is to be an annoying little bug that I want to swat,” Morrigan quipped.

Celene laughed so hard that she brought on another contraction and her laughter ended in a gasp. Athena was sitting beside her, “Breathe, Celene.” Once the contraction had eased Athena said, “I think it would be best if you got out of bed and played a hand of wicked grace.”

“Do you play?” Celene scooted herself to the edge of her bed so she could get up.

“I do, but I won’t be tonight,” Athena helped her to stand.

“Why not?” Celene inquired as they walked over to us.

“Because I get too involved in the game and my focus needs to be on you and Briala,” Athena looked behind her as she heard the elven woman softly moan.

“Duchess, you’re breaking my heart,” I quipped.

Athena chuckled, “When we get back to Skyhold, Varric.”

“Curly are you in?” I raised an eyebrow at him as I dealt the cards.

“No.”

I chuckled, "Not ready to win back your dignity yet?” 

Cullen shook his head, “If Athena’s not playing, neither am I.”

Celene looked very uncomfortable in the chair she was sitting in. Athena reminded her as she checked on Briala, “Celene, you can get up and walk around. You do not have to stay in one place if you’re uncomfortable.”

"Thank you,” Celene tried to get out of her chair. She then moaned softly and collapsed back in to the chair.

“Celene?” Athena asked quietly.

“The contractions are becoming more intense,” Celene gritted her teeth.

“That’s good. The time between them is lessening as well. Remember to breathe,” Athena sat on the arm of Curly’s chair, putting her in between the Empress and Cullen. 

“How did you convince Curly to stay?” I asked Duchess, not looking up from my cards.

“Stay where?” Athena was confused.

“Stay here,” I answered.

“At the Winter Palace?” Athena was still confused.

“No, in this room,” I quipped.

She looked at Curly helplessly, “I’m still lost.”

“I have no idea what he’s talking about,” Cullen said as his blush betrayed him.

“Odd. I remember a time in Haven where you looked like you wanted to bolt from a wonderful young lady who was very pregnant…” I grinned, enjoying Curly’s discomfort. “Celene, would you like to place the first bet?”

Celene had got up to walk around, “I thought the dealer always made the first bet?”

“I’m making an exception in your case,” I winked at her.

“Why would you want to bolt from a woman that was pregnant?” Athena raised an eyebrow at Curly.

“I didn’t,” Cullen blushed more.

“You couldn’t,” I chuckled.

Athena looked at each of us, very confused, “What happened?”

“Dwarf,” Curly warned, none too pleased as to where this story was going.

“Payback for not playing tonight,” I chuckled and waited until everyone that was playing had placed their bets and launched into my tale, “Athena was at the Storm Coast getting Tiny to join the Inquisition. This young lady comes up to Curly… I really think her intention was to flirt with him-" 

“Maker’s breath,” Cullen interrupted softly.

“She barely got out a hi before the poor woman clutched his arm and her water broke. So Curly starts yelling for Adan. Leliana yells at him to just pick her up and carry her. Cullen looked at Nightingale like she had lost her mind,” I continued.

“What happened then?” Athena watched Cullen turn from a nice shade of pink to red. I wasn’t sure if the red was because he was blushing so much or because he was that angry.

“She moaned. Curly went so pale that you wouldn’t have been able to tell him from a sheet and very carefully picked her up and carried her to the hut. Didn’t you almost drop her once?” I asked.

“She kept yelling at me to put her down, a contraction hit and she almost arched out of my arms,” Cullen grumbled, thoroughly embarrassed.

I laughed, “They made it to Adan and she gave birth to a healthy baby.”

Athena chuckled, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“The same reason you didn’t tell me about walking back to Haven in a blanket,” Cullen griped.

Athena laughed and kissed him, “I love you.”

Cullen chuckled. Duchess always had a special knack for getting Curly out of his grumps, “I love you, too.”

“Young love,” Morrigan quipped, smiling.

“When Alistair and I did that stuff in front of you… You pretended to gag,” Selene reminded her.

“There was no pretending. Athena and Cullen aren’t as annoying about it,” Morrigan responded.

"That's not fair!" Alistair’s outburst made everyone to chuckle.

“You two were constantly trying to rip each other's clothes off, no matter where we went! They, at least, try to keep the destroying of clothes private,” Morrigan dared Alistair to say more.

Cullen closed his eyes and growled, “Leliana…”

Athena chuckled, "I’m sure you will be able to find ways to embarrass her.”

“So, which one of you put a spell on Curly to keep him from running away?” I returned to the original topic.

“No one put a spell on me,” Cullen grumbled.

“He’s a bit calmer around pregnant women now,” Athena said softly, staring in to his eyes.

“And why would that be?” Celene took her seat (she was getting up to walk about every five minutes or so, and about every ten minutes we would her a sharp intake of breath from her and Athena, Morrigan, or Selene would remind her to breathe) again.

“He was forced in to helping me deliver his sister’s baby,” Athena smiled at her hero.

“Who forced him?” I was very intrigued with this development.

“The one that had the baby,” Cullen was still miffed.

“This was before…?” Morrigan trailed off, not wanting to say more. 

Athena nodded and looked down at her and Cullen’s entwined hands.

“Before what?” Alistair asked (sometimes he’s oblivious and I can see why Morrigan rips him to shreds.)

Athena looked like she was close to tears and Cullen tried to rescue her, “There are some things that need to stay private.”

“‘Tis nothing to be ashamed of,” Morrigan said softly, so softly in fact, that if it was coming from anyone other than Morrigan, I would call it gentle.

“There are some things that hurt too much to talk about,” Athena spoke, barely above a whisper as a single tear escaped.

“‘Twas not my intention to cause more pain,” Morrigan said, again in a tone that could be mistaken for gentleness. Athena nodded, accepting the apology as Cullen wiped away the tear.

Celene stood with a great amount of effort, “I fear my mind is not on the game tonight. Athena, will you walk with me in the garden?”

“Certainly,” Athena stood beside her and asked Morrigan to care for Briala.

“Your love may join as well… If he wishes,” Celene arched her back and rubbed her belly.

Cullen stood, took hold of Athena’s hand, and smiled down at her. They went out into the garden as the sun was waking from it’s slumber, and they walked quite a ways before Celene needed to stop. Sitting on a bench she leaned back with one hand gripping the back of the bench and one hand pressing down on the top of her belly. She moaned and gasped for air. Athena sat beside her, putting a hand to her back to keep the empress from falling, “I know it’s hard, but you have to try to breathe through the pain.”

Celene took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, “I have had many miscarriages… Until now,” Celene shifted to sitting straight with her hands folded in her lap, “I was terrified that I would lose this one too. I still am," She ground out as another contraction hit and tried to breathe through the pain.

“I am sorry, Celene,” Athena sympathized with her.

“Maybe we should start heading back?” Cullen suggested. He sounded a bit anxious, worried that the Empress would have the baby outside.

Athena chuckled softly, “As soon as she’s able to walk.” 

Celene smiled weakly, “Thank you. You have had a miscarriage as well?”

“Is it that easy to see?” Athena asked, worried.

Celene stood, and they started walking back to her room, “Only to those of us that have been through it. I am sorry for your loss. I feared that I would never be able to carry a pregnancy this far, but it’s happened, and I…” she stopped and groaned, crouching into a sitting position before she reached the bench behind her and a flood of water soaked her shift from the waist down. Athena and Cullen helped her to the bench before she collapsed to the ground.

“Do I need to carry her back?” Cullen questioned.

“No, this is going to be similar to Rosalie’s,” Athena smiled at him.

“I can walk, I need but a moment…” Celene gasped out.

“You still need to walk as much as possible. The contractions will be harder and faster but this could still take most of the day,” Athena tried to prepare Celene.

“I understand. Thank you for everything,” Celene stood, signaling that she was ready to continue. They walked slowly back, stopping at every bench so the Empress could sit and wait out a contraction. Once they were back in the room and Celene had a dry shift on, they saw that Nightingale, Ruffles, and Tiny had switched places with us. Morrigan was busy with Briala who’s water had also broken.

“Selene said that she would be back around lunchtime,” Leliana informed them.

“Thank you,” Athena helped Celene into a chair across from Bull.

“You had said that the only Qunari you knew was the Iron Bull… Is this him?” Celene struggled to get comfortable. Athena brought over a pillow from Celene’s bed and placed it at her lower back. Celene sighed in relief, “Thank you.”

“Yes, this is Bull,” Athena went to the door and asked for someone to send breakfast.

“Hungry?” Cullen stood at the garden door with arms and ankles crossed, leaning a shoulder against the frame.

“Starving. Celene you will need to try to eat something as well,” Athena said. Celene nodded gripping the arms of her chair, Athena ordered without looking at her, “Breathe, Celene.”

Celene did as she was told and released her grip on the chair, “How did you know?”

“Because I didn’t get an answer,” Athena took up her perch on the arm of the chair Cullen was formerly in after checking on Briala. Duchess and Morrigan agreed that Briala should start pushing,

“Why are you always perching yourself on the arms of chairs?” Ruffles inquired about what she considered a naughty habit of the Inquisitor’s.

“Because I like to?” Athena shrugged, not really in the mood to discuss the finer points of etiquette.

Celene struggled to get out of the chair. Athena assisted her, she stood and slowly walked around the room pressing against her back with both hands. Celene paused, using a bedpost for support and watched as her lover gave birth. 

When Briala and the new baby were cleaned up and resting, Athena offered to Celene, “Why don’t I see how your progressing?”

Celene nodded and using the bed for balance sat down on it and moaned. Athena fairly flew over to her to help her to get to a supine position, “Where do you hurt Celene?”

“My head,” She whispered. Athena quickly focused her magic there and took away the headache. 

Celene laid her head back and sighed in relief. Athena checked the Empress, “Rest while you can. It’s going to be a long day.” Celene nodded and closed her eyes.

Athena walked over to Cullen and he unwrapped himself to wrap her in his arms. He whispered, “Are you all right?”

She looked up at him and smiled wearily, “Tired. If her headache comes back when the labor is more intense, I don’t think I’ll be able to help her.”

Cullen kissed her, “Do not harm yourself.”

“I won’t,” Athena whispered.

“You’re still worried…”

“I am. I know nothing about birthing half Qunari babies. Do they come out with horns? Because Celene isn’t Qunari, is she even going to be able to have it without surgery?” Athena asked Cullen, not really expecting an answer.

“Surgery?” Cullen paled, not liking the sound of that at all.

Athena chuckled, “Yes. Hopefully it won’t come to that though.” 

“You know, Boss, if you have questions. You can always ask,” Bull raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not sure how comfortable Celene would be with her secret being told without her knowledge,” Athena sounded nervous.

“You kind of just did, Boss,” Tiny answered.

Athena sighed, “See Leliana? This is why I could never be a spymaster. When I’m exhausted I’m not completely aware of what I’m saying.”

Leliana chuckled, “We already knew. Bull knows Celene’s lover.”

"In your defense, you were talking to me,” Cullen interjected as our lovers moved to sit with Leliana, Ruffles, and Tiny.

“Do I want to know how you know Celene’s lover, Bull?” Athena remembered all too well how raunchy some of Tiny’s stories got.

“Her lover is a good man. He would be considered Tal-vashoth over this though,” Bull answered.

“And Celene would lose her Empire,” Josephine said quietly.

“Complete and utter nonsense,” Cullen groused.

Athena chuckled, “I agree.”

“But that is how the game is played,” Leliana informed them.

“A game to keep people that love each other apart is a game I have absolutely no interest in playing,” Athena became passionate, “Why does it matter? Can’t people just be happy that love exists in the world, providing a soft place to land when the heartbreaks become too much?”

“The council of heralds would force her to abdicate,” Josephine looked at her petite hand that now carried an engagement ring.

"The council of heralds be damned. They should have no say over her love life or whom she chooses to marry if that is her wish. She’s the Empress, why does she have to go through the council of heralds?” Athena was not watching how loud she got.

“And this is why I continue and will continue to be a part of the Inquisition,” Leliana smiled.

“Because I’m a hopeless romantic?” Athena chuckled.

“That and because you care. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here now, you wouldn’t have been up all night with Celene, even though I’m sure your heart is breaking inside,” Josephine gently reminded Duchess.

Athena looked away, “I can’t stop people from having babies just because…” Athena paused and smiled a little, “it would be nice to have a less active role in bringing those babies in to the world for a little.”

“When we get back to Skyhold,” Cullen promised. There was loud banging on the door. Curly asked, irritated, “Are they hitting the door with a hammer?” Cullen answered the door and brought in a tray of food.

Everyone chuckled including Celene, and then she groaned. Athena walked over and stood beside the bed, “I apologize if I woke you…”

“You didn’t…” Celene paused, breathing through another contraction, “If I married Briala… We would have your support?” 

“Do you love her?”

"Yes," Celene moved to get off the bed to join the rest of the group.

“Does she love you?” Athena did not want to support a loveless anything (as she said, hopeless romantic.)

“She does, and the father of my child says we are Kadans,” Celene sat in the chair that had the extra pillow.

"I've heard that term used before," Athena winked at Tiny.

"What name does he go by here?" Bull asked.

“Draco,” Celene answered.

"Good name, short for Dragon?” Bull approved.

“Yes,” Celene gasped, hunching forward a little. 

"So, Bull, the questions I asked earlier?" Athena adjusted the pillow behind Celene.

“It’s going to take longer, and no, we’re not born with horns. Where is Draco?” Bull questioned.

“In Val Royeaux, on business,” Celene paled at the sight of food but she was desperately thirsty. 

Athena went to the door to ask for some water, “It would be nice if they served something other than wine at breakfast.” 

“What business did he have in Val Royeaux?” Leliana filled her plate.

“There was an attempt on his life, and he didn’t want me to get caught in the middle…” Celene trailed off.

"Get caught in the middle?” Cullen pulled Athena down to sit beside him. While Duchess was asking for water he had occupied the chair beside the Empress. 

“Draco said that they wanted to get to him through me, we had just found out that I was with child, and he…” Celene was cut off by a groan of pain.

“He left you?” Ruffles asked, incredulous.

“He didn’t leave until a few weeks ago,” Celene gasped out, trying to breathe through the contraction, but it wasn’t working very well, “He wanted to stop the threat.”

The water finally arrived and Athena poured and gave a glass to the Empress, “Drink it slowly.”

“When did Florianne arrive?” Nightingale was cold and calculating in her question, her spymaster brain thinking that the pieces weren’t fitting together as they should.

“The same day the threat was made known to us,” Celene sipped the water.

Athena, Leliana, and Cullen all exchanged glances, thinking the same thing. The threat wasn’t for Draco, it was to get Celene and Briala alone. Leliana stood, while walking to the door she said, “I am sorry to leave, but I just remembered that I had to meet with someone.” 

“Boss, what do you have against wine?” Tiny changed the subject to ease the abrupt tension in the air.

“I don’t like it,” Athena finally got food for herself. Cullen shook his head at her softly chuckling. She noticed, “What?”

“You’re amazing,” Cullen softly kissed her.

“Thank you…?” Athena put down her fork, very confused.

“You had asked me to remind you of that last night,” Cullen chuckled again.

“And breakfast was served an hour ago,” Ruffles teased.

Athena shrugged, eating quickly. Celene kept shifting in her chair like she was sitting on sharp stones. Athena paused to ask, “Celene?”

“Garderobe!” Celene blushed.

“Go!”

Cullen stood and held out a hand, “Would you like some help getting up, Celene?” 

“Very much so, thank you,” Celene took his hand and hoisted herself up from the chair. 

As Curly was assisting the Empress I walked in and immediately quipped, “Odd how Athena refuses help from the love of her life, but Celene, who barely knows him, doesn’t.”

“Yes, we all know that I make a horrible patient. Now that I’ve admitted to one of many failings, can we move on?” Athena griped, causing everyone to laugh. 

As Celene came out of the gerderob she held on to the door frame laughing, her laugh was cut short by a loud groan and if not for Cullen she would have fallen to her knees. Cullen assisted her to the closest chair. Celene moaned when she sat, leaning back on the chair so much that she half slid out of it. 

Athena walked over to her and said quietly, “let’s get you to your bed.” Cullen and Bull helped her up and over to the bed. Athena asked Ruffles and I, “Can you find Selene please?” We left to find them with Tiny in tow.

Cullen took hold of Athena’s hands after she arranged the pillows behind and around the Empress and pulled her close to him, whispering, “How much longer?”

“Hopefully no longer than a few hours?” Athena whispered as well. Celene moaned in agony. Athena smiled reassuringly at her and said to Cullen, “Once Selene gets here, you don’t have to stay.” 

“This time, I’m going to take you up on that,” Cullen caressed her cheek.

Athena kissed him, “I understand.”

“You sent for me?” Selene peeked her head in after softly knocking on the large white doors.

“I did, it’s time,” Athena pulled away from Cullen after they kissed goodbye. 

After he left, the first person he ran into was me (I was fighting a never ending war of paperwork), “I thought you would be in there until everything was said and done.”

“Athena has help, otherwise I would be,” Curly yawned.

“You should probably get some rest,” I walked along with him, wanting to make sure he didn’t pass out.

“I honestly don’t know if I’d be able to sleep right now,” Cullen responded as Nightingale made a bee line for us.

“Here comes trouble,” I quipped.

Curly chuckled. Leliana asked, “Where’s the Inquisitor?”

“She’s still with the Empress,” Cullen answered.

“No baby yet?” She seemed slightly worried.

“Not yet,” Curly yawned, again.

"If you two are here, who’s with her?” Leliana turned to walk with us.

“Morrigan and the Queen. You spoke with Florianne?” Cullen was thinking it would be best if any news of Florianne for Athena would come from him.

“I did…” Leliana trailed off, struggling to put her thoughts in to words, which was quite unusual for our former bard.

“Who did she try to kill now?” I half joked.

“No one, yet… She kept talking about Brigidh. How she wasn’t truly dead. I was hoping Celene would be able to tell us more about when Florianne arrived. Florianne refuses to admit if she once again plotted against Celene,” Leliana explained.

“How do you know that she’s telling the truth?” Cullen was understandably hesitant to believe anything Florianne said.

“I used one of Athena’s tricks,” Leliana smirked, proud of her ingenuity.

“Who did you get to pull off “the truth” spell?” I asked.

“I brought Florianne a drink mixed with a spice that can make you sweat, and after she drank it all, I told her that it was a truth serum that would react to her lies,” Nightingale answered. I shook my head laughing. Curly chuckled and Leliana continued, “I’ll let you two rest. I’m going to see if the Inquisitor needs help,” Leliana turned and went the opposite direction from where we were heading. 

I was starting to wonder if Curly had a destination in mind or if he was just walking to stay awake, “So, Curly, if you’re not going to sleep… Are you interested in a game of Wicked Grace?”

“Let me check on Kieran and Alistair, and… Maybe,” Curly hesitated, not too keen on playing Wicked Grace with a sleep deprived mind, but also needed something to do.

“Maybe is better than a no,” I chuckled. 

We checked in on Kieran who asked as soon as we entered his room, "Can we sword fight again?"

Cullen laughed at the boy’s cheek, “Hopefully tomorrow. So long as your mom is all right with it.”

Kieran danced around the room as we left. Alistair on the other hand was in no mood for dancing as Marie had been crying non-stop since the Queen had left. Cullen went over to her and pulled the blanket down from her face, she grabbed hold of his hand, stuck a finger in her mouth and spit it out, crying even harder. Cullen smiled, thinking he knew what was wrong with the baby, “Have you fed her?”

"How am I supposed to do that?” Alistair asked, exasperated.

“Selene didn’t leave anything for you?” Cullen was surprised as the Selene he had known was always given to forethought.

“Just this weird looking glove-thing,” Alistair motioned to it and started to pace.

Cullen laughed softly as he grabbed the glove thing and picked up Marie, putting the finger looking thing in her mouth she started to suck on it and once she had her fill, Curly rubbed her back to get her to burp and off to sleep she went. 

Alistair and I both stared at Cullen dumbfounded. Seeing our looks after he laid the baby down, he laughed softly, “I have two younger siblings. Sometimes my mother would ask for my help.”

“But you panic around pregnant women,” I teased.

“Shut up, dwarf,” Cullen responded, good naturedly (exhaustion had sapped all of the blush out of him,) and then one of the nurse maids came in to take over for Alistair.

“Your Majesty?” The woman questioned upon seeing a happily sleeping Marie. 

“She’s been fed and is content for her nap now… Do you mind staying with her?” Alistair requested, but we all knew the servant would’t say no to the King. 

“Not at all,” the woman curtsied and pulled a chair over to sit near the cradle.

We left so we wouldn’t disturb the sleeping baby and I asked, “Up for a hand of Wicked Grace, Your Majesty? Curly needs to learn how to play.” I winked at him.

“Dwarf,” Curly warned. I laughed.

“Sure…?” Alistair questioned. 

We returned to the main hall so Cullen and Alistair could watch for their loves. I dealt the cards and placed the first bet, we played quietly for a bit, and then Tiny joined us and he livened things up quite a bit by telling stories of Seheron.

Ruffles walked by and saw Cullen playing, “Where are the ladies?”

“The Empress was still in labor when I left a couple hours ago,” Cullen grimaced at his cards (yes, he was losing.)

“Don’t be surprised if you don’t see them until well after dinner,” Bull warned them.

“Don’t tell them that, Tiny, they’ll want to go back,” I groused.

Alistair responded, “The only woman I want to see giving birth is my wife.”

Cullen smiled sadly and remained quiet, wishing he could say the same about Athena. I saw the wistful look and said softly, “Soon, Commander.”

Josephine had turned away from us and was heading toward Celene’s chambers. When Bull noticed he inquired as to where she   
was going.

“I’m going to go check on them,” Ruffles responded. However, before she got out of earshot we heard yelling coming for that direction… All five of us started running toward the shouting match. One of the servants was yelling at an imposing Qunari, “You cannot go in there!” 

The Qunari yelled back, “I can and I will!”

“Draco?” Tiny didn’t want to make assumptions, but recognized the giant (Drago was leaner than Bull, but he stood a full head taller than him.)

“Hisrad?” Draco was surprised to see his old friend.

“I go by The Iron Bull now,” Bull half smiled as he remembered the conquests they had together.

“Why are you here?” Draco became suddenly suspicious and worried.

“Because I was invited,” Bull smirked. When he saw that his obtuse answer didn’t get any laughs he explained further, “I’m here with the Inquisitor. The Empress invited her here.”

”I would love to drink you under the table… But I really need to see the Empress,” Draco smiled in relief and turned his attention back to the servants and soldiers barring his way.

“The Empress is indisposed and is not receiving any more visitors,” one of the soldiers said mulishly with his arms crossed.

“I need to speak with the Inquisitor,” Cullen pushed past the guards and into the Empress’s chambers. Quickly closing the door behind him, he waited until Celene had stopped moaning to pull Athena away. 

“Hi,” she said wearily, coming over to him.

“What’s wrong?” Cullen asked, seeing the worried look in her eyes.

“It seems like the baby is stuck and I don’t know how to help her,” Athena responded tremulously. Her fear was that she was going to lose both the Empress and the babe.

“Are you all right?” He took hold of her hands after she wiped them off on a clean towel.

“I’m tired,” Athena sighed, “we heard yelling outside…?”

“Draco’s here,” Cullen saw the all too familiar haunted look in his fiancee’s eyes and had to resist the urge to pull her away from Celene to protect Duchess (he also surmised that he would have a huge fight on his hands if he tried to pull her away.)

Celene started to moan again and Athena went back to her, and looked over at Curly, “Cullen, send him in please?”

He smiled at her and nodded. When he returned, he informed the guards, “I spoke with the Empress and she desires a meeting with Draco. Let him through.”

The soldiers parted to let the Qunari through. As Draco opened the door a loud groan could be heard from the Empress. Before he closed it we heard him say, “I am here.”

We awkwardly stood around for a couple minutes not sure what to do… Then we heard the wailing of a new born baby and we all sighed with relief. Several minutes later Duchess, Nightingale, Selene, and Morrigan came out. Selene kissed her husband and they went off to be with their adopted baby. Leliana, Bull, and Josephine went off to find trouble. I chuckled and said to our lovers before I abandoned them, “I don’t want to see you two until lunch time tomorrow.”

Athena was using the door frame for support until Curly wrapped a strong arm around her waist. Cullen murmured in her ear, “You and I are going to take a very long and well deserved nap.”

“Promise?” Athena leaned in to him.

Curly smiled, “I promise.”

The three of them walked back quietly. Until Cullen said to Morrigan, “Kieran asked if we could sword fight again tomorrow…”

Morrigan chuckled and before she entered her room, “That is up to you, Commander. I know he is in safe hands with you.”

Once safely ensconced in their room Cullen had to ask as he got undressed, “What happened after Draco entered?”

Athena was swaying back and forth, trying to not fall asleep on her feet, “He had to cut her open to get the baby out, and then he healed her with magic.”

“Was this the surgery you were talking about?” Cullen moved quickly to keep Duchess on her feet by wrapping his arms around her waist.

Athena nodded barely able to keep her eyes open. Curly helped her undress and got in to bed. Before they could murmur “I love you” to each other, they were asleep.


	37. Chapter 37

Cullen ruffled Kieran’s hair as they finished sword fighting. Collecting the swords he said, “I should have you train the new recruits.”

Morrigan looked at Athena and shook her head emphatically, “When do you leave for Skyhold?”

“Hopefully tomorrow,” Athena responded as Kieran ran up to his mom with a huge smile.

“Mother, did you hear what the Commander said?”

“I did, and that will keep until you are much older,” Morrigan told him.

They said their goodbyes to the King and Queen of Fereldan with promises of seeing each other again at Curly and Duchess’ wedding. Cullen took hold of Athena’s hand while Alistair hesitated with Kieran. Athena whispered to Morrigan, “Does Kieran know?”

Morrigan gave a single nod of her head. Kieran hugged Alistair and walked back to his mother. The royals left and Morrigan and Kieran went back in to the palace to pack with Kieran asking, “Please can we move back to Skyhold?”

Morrigan answered, “The Inquisitor and I will discuss it.”

Cullen and Athena chuckled as they stood on the balcony overlooking the garden, holding each other, he said, “I get the feeling Kieran’s going to get his way.”

“I think you may be right,” Athena smiled and stood on tip toe to kiss him, “shall we go pack?”

Cullen pulled her tight against him and kissed her passionately, whispering huskily, “I had other things in mind.” Releasing her he took her hand and they walked swiftly to their chamber. 

Once inside, Athena got pressed up against the door as they started kissing, they fumbled around to get the clothes off of each other. Free of the hinderance of clothing, Cullen lifted Athena up in his strong arms and entered her, eliciting a surprised moan of ecstasy from her.

They were laying in bed with Cullen caressing her shoulder when Duchess whined, “I don’t want to move.”

Cullen laughed softly, “Then don’t.”

“Morrigan, Leliana, and I have to talk to Florianne.”

“I think that’s something Morrigan and Leliana can handle on their own,” Cullen remarked as Athena lifted her head from his chest to look at him.

“They have been. They can’t get anything out of her…” Athena trailed off.

“And they think you can?” Cullen held her to him, preventing her from moving any further.

“Every time they bring me up while interrogating her she screams that she’ll kill me once she’s free,” Athena half heartedly struggled against his embrace, but she found Cullen’s arms too strong and warm to resist being held by him for a little longer.

“And that would be all the more reason for you to stay away from her,” Cullen tried to remain calm, not liking the idea that Duchess would have to face a would be assassin.

Athena chuckled, recognizing the stiff tone Curly was using. She only heard it when he was worried about her (which was constantly), “Leliana’s hoping her anger toward me will cause her to make a mistake and tell us something.”

“Or it could cause her to attack you,” Cullen was irritated. Once again, Athena had to put her life in danger to play the bait. He didn’t like it when they were just working together, now it bothered him so much more.

“You can come with me, if you wish,” Athena struggled to get up from laying on Curly. Knowing that if she didn’t, she would stay in his arms the rest of the day.

“Or we could stay here,” he argued not releasing her and rolling so that Duchess was underneath him as he kissed her.

“I can’t believe Varric ever said you work too much,” Athena responded huskily, as she gave up the fight and kissed his neck.

“You’re a bad influence,” Cullen smirked. Athena gasped in an outrage that was soon forgotten as the throes of passion took over.

**

“You’re late,” Leliana chided as Athena and Cullen walked in to the library. Which they were utilizing as their “war room.”

“I was being held captive,” Athena wished they were still whiling away the day in bed. But, she couldn’t resist blaming Curly.

“And you enjoyed every minute of it,” Cullen seductively murmured so only Athena could hear him, it still caused her to blush.

“Where’s Morrigan?” Athena asked as her blush faded, deciding it was wise to change the subject.

“She’s talking to Florianne already,” Leliana answered as they walked to the room (the Winter Palace didn’t have a dungeon,) where Florianne was being held.

“She’s not by herself is she?” Athena worried.

“No, Draco and Bull went with her.”

“Why is the Inquisitor needed?” Cullen was worried for Athena’s safety, and he also knew that Duchess wasn’t the greatest at interrogations.

“When I talked to them earlier, they still hadn’t broken her. She’s still insisting that Brigidh is alive and that she wants to kill the Inquisitor,” Leliana wanted to allay Cullen’s fears, but couldn’t.

Cullen growled irritably. He didn’t like Athena being in the same palace as her would be assassin, much less in the same room, “I guess this means…”

Athena smiled sweetly at him, “It’s not in my skill set to find out if dead demons don’t stay dead.”

Cullen’s sigh of relief was immediate as he murmured, “Thank the Maker.”

“You’re enjoying this too much,” Leliana griped, wondering where she was going to find a mage with this particular skill.

Athena shrugged, not the least bit apologetic, “For once there is something I absolutely cannot do. That doesn’t happen all that often.”

“Where do we find a mage that can do that?” Leliana wasn’t expecting an answer. 

Athena shrugged again in answer. Cullen laughed, “Leliana’s right, you are enjoying this too much.”

Athena chuckled, “Morrigan may know?”

As they approached the door to Florianne’s room they heard Draco growl.

“I’ll kill Celene, or maybe her elven lover first!” Florianne cackled, “And then I’ll kill the Inquisitor."

Athena closed her eyes, the fun of mere moments ago drained out of her. Sighing, she opened them and looked at Leliana, “You really want me to go in there?”

“If there were any other way…” Leliana trailed off, her voice filled with sympathy.

“Can’t this wait until we return to Skyhold?” Cullen practically barked, his irritation from earlier back in full force.

“Celene is afraid Florianne will escape again. I believe Celene intends to execute her, once judgement is passed,” Leliana said quietly.

“If that’s the case, why don’t I just pass judgement on her here?” Athena suggested. 

Cullen kissed her, “Leave it to you to find the most sensible solution.”

“We still need to know what she knows,” Leliana opened the door.

“Do not let her in here! I will kill you, Inquisitor!” Florianne screamed.

“And here I thought we could be the best of friends,” Athena said sarcastically. Everyone but Florianne did their best to hide their laughter. Florianne screamed and pulled against the bonds tying her to the bed. Athena continued, “Do you truly despise your cousin so much? Is the power worth it?”

“Brigidh loves me! She whispers to me that if I kill Celene, and you, and take enough lyrium, the world will be ours. I would not be able to hear her if she was in the Fade!” Florianne yelled.

Duchess paced away from Florianne with a frown creasing her brow as Morrigan continued to question the former Grand Duchess. Lost in thought she didn’t notice Cullen standing in front of her until he quietly asked, “Inquisitor?”

She looked in to his warm brown eyes with consternation lighting her violet ones, “This doesn’t make any sense.”

Cullen uncrossed his arms and took hold of Athena’s hands, waiting for her to explain what she was thinking in more detail. She briefly glanced away from him to gather her thoughts, “When she was working for Corypheus, it was because she wanted power, now she wants love? And not just any love but love from a demon?”

“Are you saying that she’s lying?” Cullen asked.

“No, I think she believes that what she’s saying is the truth. But, she took lyrium and lots of it…” Athena trailed off, not wanting to bring up painful memories for Cullen.

“You think her mind is broken,” Cullen stated. 

Athena gave a single nod of her head, “I don’t think we’re going to get anything more out of her.”

“I’ll talk to her,” Cullen said authoritatively, releasing Athena’s hands.

“Cullen…” Athena trailed off, the worry and love she had for him evident in her violet eyes.

“I’ll be all right.” He briefly kissed her forehead before walking to Florianne’s side, “What does Brigidh say to you?”

Florianne got a dreamy look on her face and mumbled incoherently. She stared off at the ceiling almost as if she was gazing at a lover. 

“Florianne, where is Brigidh now?” Morrigan caught on to Curly’s interrogation method.

“She is…” Florianne lost the dreamy look and thought, the answer was beyond her reach and that bothered her, “away. Once she returns, we will kill you Inquisitor and whomever else she wants to.”

"Is that so?" Athena asked quietly and then with menace lacing her voice, “I could kill you right now and you two can have your happily ever after in the Fade.”

“My Brigidh is not dead!” And then Florianne paled, realizing what Athena had threatened and gasped, “you wouldn’t kill a defenseless person.”

“I think you would say anything to extend your life. With all the lyrium you took, it’s a miracle you still live,” Morrigan scoffed.

Florianne laughed herself ill. No one else was in on what she found so funny.

Athena turned on her heel and left. Everyone else except the guards followed. Once safely away from Florianne being ill, Athena sighed, “We will have much to discuss with the Empress tonight at dinner.”

“Where are you off to?” Leliana inquired.

“To pack. Skyhold is tame compared to Halamshiral,” Athena didn’t pause to talk.

"We leave at first light tomorrow," Cullen walked with Athena.

Morrigan followed them, “Kieran is insisting that we join you on your journey."

“Are you able to?” Athena asked as Curly took hold of her hand.

“We are,” Morrigan nodded and smiled.

Athena smiled, “You and Kieran are always welcome.”

"Thank you, my friend. I’ll see you at dinner,” Morrigan walked on to her room.

As the door to our lovers’ bed chamber closed behind them Curly asked, “Why did you rush out of Florianne’s room?”

Athena started putting her clothes in her trunk, “Broken bones, blood, I can handle. Vomit, I can’t….”

“Is this like your fear of graveyards?” He started putting his clothes away too.

“I guess? I would always end up getting ill if I saw someone else getting ill,” Athena responded.

Cullen stopped and walked over to her, taking hold of her hands, "Is that why you couldn’t stop getting sick when….”

“Our baby was lost?” Athena asked to clarify, he nodded. She smiled sadly at him, “I don’t know.”

Cullen kissed her then and said against her lips, “I love you, Athena.”

“I love you, too,” Athena whispered back with tears filling her eyes, remembering the agony of that night and what followed.  
Cullen saw her tears. He said the following gently, but with passion, "We can take as long as Selene and Alistair did or longer, but we’re not going to give up, if that is your wish.”

Athena closed her eyes as the tears started trickling down her cheeks, she kissed him and whispered, “Thank you.”

Cullen pulled her into his arms and held her until Ruffles knocked, “May I come in?”

Athena pulled back from him and wiped her tears away. Cullen asked if she was okay with his eyes and she nodded while answering, “Yes, Josie.”

The door opened and Josephine paused when she saw the tender scene and said, “I can come back later if I’m interrupting.”

"It's all right. We were finishing up packing,” Athena answered. Josephine looked to Cullen and he nodded his head releasing Athena except for her hand.

“The servants can finish that. Tommy’s here to say goodbye to you and Kieran. The Empress asked if she could speak with you and the Commander privately before dinner,” Ruffles filled them in.

Athena brightened at hearing Tommy’s name. Cullen looked down at her, “Then we shouldn’t keep them waiting.”

As they walked to the front garden Duchess noticed that Ruffles was nervous and had to comment on it, “Josie, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this nervous….”

“What? Oh, I’m sorry…” Josephine paused, “I guess I’m just anxious to get back to Skyhold.”

“That’s not it…” Athena called her friend’s bluff.

"Oh all right... I don't where Bull and I will get married,” Ruffles sighed in frustration.

Cullen chuckled at her consternation while Athena was confused, “What do you mean?”

“Well, he’s Qunari but can’t go home. Antiva would not look favorably on our union…” Josephine trailed off.

Athena laughed, “Josie, Skyhold is your home too. Get married there.”

“You mean it?” Ruffles asked excitedly.

Cullen laughed, “Yes, she means it.”

“I won’t start planning mine until you have your day, but… Oh, thank you!” Josephine hugged Athena and then awkwardly hugged Cullen which had Athena laughing very hard after Ruffles ran off to tell Tiny.

Cullen opened the door to the front garden. When Tommy saw Athena he started running toward her and yelled, “ATHENA!”

“Hi Tommy,” Athena opened her arms to receive him. Curly stood behind her so she wasn’t knocked down again. They hugged, Athena doing her best not to give in to tears.

“Kieran told me that the Commander is teaching him to sword fight! When I was at Skyhold he would do that with me too,” Tommy was breathless from excitement.

"He did?" Athena looked at Cullen with an eyebrow raised, finding it odd that she was just now hearing about this. 

Cullen blushed slightly, “I did. Would you like to show Athena what you can do?”

Tommy’s eyes got wide, “YES!”

Curly chuckled and after quickly kissing Duchess he went and got four wooden swords. Morrigan looked over at Athena. “Why does your love have four swords?”

“I have no idea,” Athena chuckled as the boys raced down the stairs to Cullen. Cullen looked up at Athena and motioned for her to come down, she looked at him quizzically and shook her head.

"It appears your Commander wants you to fight as well,” Morrigan softly intoned.

Athena blushed and shook her head again, “I’ve never…”

“You had no need to,” Morrigan finished for her.

Cullen mounted the stairs and took her hand after giving the boys instructions on how to use them, “Come on.”

“I have only held a sword once in my life,” Athena watched the boys and winced as Kieran gave Tommy a pretty good whack.

“When was this?” Morrigan admitted to some curiosity with her query.

“When my advisors decided that I should be Inquisitor,” Athena glanced at Cullen.

"Then it's about time you learned," Cullen pulled her down the stairs. Athena’s protests fell on deaf ears.

“How am I supposed to watch the boys, if I’m trying to learn for myself?” Athena thought her question was a good one and a way to get her out of this nonsense.

“You’ll get to fight them a bit later,” Curly smirked. (He was enjoying this far too much.)

“No!” Athena was incredibly worried that she would hurt one of the boys.

“They’ll be gentle with you,” Cullen teased, chuckling.

“That’s not what I’m worried about and you know it,” she grumbled.

Cullen handed her a wooden sword. She looked down at it as if it was going to bite her. Curly couldn’t help but laugh, “It’s not going to bite you.”

“I think I’d rather face a dragon,” Athena said softly still staring at the sword.

Cullen shook his head, “You can pick the sword up.”

Athena looked over at the crowd gathering on the balcony to witness her sword fighting and groaned, “Great, an audience…”

Cullen chuckled again and said softly as he came close to her, “Do you really think I would allow you to be embarrassed in your first go round?”

“I’m not so certain you have any control over that,” Athena was still looking a little scared of the wooden sword.

“You can do it, Athena!” Tommy shouted in encouragement. As his reward for getting distracted Kieran whacked him.

“Why do you call her Athena?” Kieran asked and got whacked in return.

“That’s what she told me to call her. I doubt she’d mind you calling her by her name,” Tommy blocked Kieran’s move.

“Inquisitor,” Cullen said, in a position signaling he was ready to start. Athena still had the sword point in the ground and was watching the boys. Curly sighed and walked the few paces over to her, “Athena…”

“What? They were talking about me,” Athena mulishly replied.

“People always talk about you,” Cullen got back to a ready position.

"But I adore those two little boys,” Athena nervously spun the sword (yes, the point was still in the ground.)

"And you love me, but you’re not listening,” Cullen good naturedly griped. 

“I do listen to you, but you haven’t told me what to do yet,” Athena griped back.

“First, I need to know that you’re paying attention,” Cullen reminded her. In answer, Athena looked at him and stuck her tongue out at him. Which sent laughter through those of us gathered on the balcony. Cullen shook his head and growled, “Woman.”

“Yes, Commander?” Athena smiled sweetly at him.

“You’ll pay for that. Pick up your sword,” Cullen plotted against her. Athena did as he asked, but she picked it up with two hands. Curly informed her, “You only need one hand to hold it.”

“Why?” Athena baldly asked.

“There's not enough room on the hilt for you to hold it with two hands and it would throw your balance off,” Cullen explained. Athena took one of her hands off of the grip. Cullen got behind her and adjusted her stance.

“You could have just told me,” Athena was nervous because of the attention she was receiving from all of us.

“Where would the fun be in that?” Cullen seductively replied, causing her to blush, “Swing at me.”

Athena swung at him, but it was obvious she was afraid of hurting him… Or herself. Curly easily blocked it, “You can swing harder than that.” And so she did. The lesson went on for about an hour before Cullen called the boys over to them. “Kieran you’re with me. Tommy you can teach Athena,” Cullen winked at him.

“Aww,” Kieran was disappointed.

"Kieran, you can call me Athena, and I’m newer at this than you are,” Athena explained gently.

“Tommy and I had several months to practice, and it looks as though he’s kept practicing. You and I haven’t had that long,” Cullen said gently, crouching down in front of Kieran.

“All right,” Kieran smiled at him.

They switched partners and after about fifteen minutes, Athena laughingly cried mercy. The swords were put away and Cullen kissed Athena for a very long time which was greeted with “ewws” from the boys. As they walked up the stairs Curly said, “I thought you did well.”

“No, I didn’t, but it’s very sweet of you to say so,” Athena responded. Tommy said his goodbyes and Athena got down on her knees in front of him and said, “You and your family are welcome at any time to come to Skyhold. I’ll miss you.” 

“I’ll miss you, too,” Tommy hugged her which brought tears to her eyes. Kieran walked him to the gate and they said goodbye there.

I had to lighten the mood a little, “You know Curly, if you train Duchess too well in handling a sword she may have to take over your position.”

“Andraste preserve me, isn’t once enough?” Athena was incredulous.

Cullen chuckled, "You’re always asking me to play Wicked Grace.”

“And you always counter with chess,” Athena griped.

“Or something else,” Leliana chimed in to their lover’s spat. Which caused them to blush.

**

We went our separate ways. Cullen and Athena went to speak with the Empress before dinner. Where they decided Athena would judge Florianne after dinner. At the end of the meeting Celene thanked them for all they did and continue to do. Dinner was calm except for Draco and Bull shouting Qunari insults at each other. 

“Commander, what did you think of the Inquisitor’s first sword practice?” The Empress asked.

“I thought she did well,” Cullen took hold of Athena’s hand underneath the table.

Athena shook her head, blushing, “I’ll stick with magic.”

“If there is ever a reason that you cannot use magic. I want you to be able to defend yourself,” Cullen said so softly that he was barely heard by the rest of the table.

Athena kissed him and whispered, "I love you.”

“I think the Commander has a pretty good idea,” Bull said, “when we get back to Skyhold, Kadan.”

“Thank you so much, Commander,” Ruffles griped.

"You're welcome," Curly smirked.

As the dishes were cleared away Florianne was brought out in chains. Celene and Athena had agreed on the punishment of being imprisoned for the rest of her days.

"We have an early start tomorrow,” Cullen quietly spoke into the lull of conversation trying to get him and Athena out of there.

“You just want alone time with the boss,” Bull teased.

“Can you blame me?” Cullen smiled at Athena because she was blushing.

“Commander!” Athena tried to hide behind her hair.

“Duchess, are you feeling all right?” I questioned.

“Yes, why?” Athena turned her attention to me.

“Because I can’t remember the last time you called Curly Commander,” I laughed. She closed her eyes and shook her head at me. I continued, “I know that look, she’s going to try and bow out without blushing.”

Athena opened her eyes, looked at Curly, “Maybe I should have let you kill him.”

Cullen chuckled, "Then you wouldn't be able to get anymore books out of him."

Before I could respond Ruffles and Tiny said their good nights. I winked at our lovers, “I’m too valuable to kill.”

“I hate it when he’s right,” Athena griped, I chuckled. She then smiled at the Empress and continued, “Commander Cullen is right. If all goes according to plan, we will be leaving the Winter Palace at first light.”

“Definitely not in Skyhold anymore,” I said just above a whisper.

Morrigan (who was sitting beside me,) choked back a laugh, “You just now figured that out?”

“No, the weird shit that happens here can stay here, but it is affecting how Duchess refers to Curly,” I answered.

Morrigan chuckled, “Titles are generally preferred when discussing matters of state.”

“They were discussing going to bed.” I quipped.

“But in the company of an Empress,” Morrigan returned.

“Yeah, an Empress that Duchess assisted in delivering her child,” I griped, wanting to protect Athena.

“Varric, it’s all right,” Athena joined the fray, in an attempt to calm me down.

“They don’t know what you’ve been through,” I was being over-protective and anxious to leave.

“Yes, they do. But I appreciate that you care so much. You’re a good friend, Varric,” Athena smiled at me. One of those winning smiles that looks like the sun just burst upon a bright new day.

“Duchess…” I croaked out past the lump in my throat.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a dwarf blush before,” Draco laughed so hard that he fell off his chair. I smirked.

“The Inquisitor gets him to blush quite easily,” Curly smirked.

“Yeah, I’m her only victim. How many times has she gotten you to blush today, Curly?” I inquired.

“Shut up, dwarf,” Curly groused, blushing.

Athena was laughing, which warmed the hearts of all of us, “I do think it is time we all turned in. And Varric, it’s probably not wise to antagonize Morrigan…”

Morrigan chuckled and tilted her head to the side, “Your dwarf friend would make a cute bunny.”

Athena lost it then, laughing hysterically. I groused, “That’s not fair.”

“It may not be fair, but it is funny,” Curly chuckled as he stood, pulling Athena up with him, “we’ll be here all night if we don’t leave now.”

"No sword fighting without witnesses," I called after them.

“Shut up, Varric!” Athena was incredibly exasperated with me. Cullen out right laughed and we heard Athena say to him, “That was not funny!”

Unfortunately we weren’t able to hear Curly’s response, but he did tell me about it later:

“Yes, it was. Especially considering what I have in mind,” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“Wasn’t this afternoon enough?” Athena dreaded another sword fight.

Cullen opened the door to their chambers chuckling softly, “I was thinking we could make use of the bed before we had to sleep on cots for a good portion of the week.”

“What does the bed have to do with sword fighting?” Athena asked, confused.

"Oh, Athena,” Cullen sighed and kissed her passionately.

“Ohh… That,” Athena responded huskily throwing her arms around his neck and returning Curly’s passion.


	38. Chapter 38

Once we arrived back at Skyhold. There was a whirlwind of activity in getting ready for Curly and Duchess’s wedding… At least a whirlwind of activity for Ruffles.

“Josie! Stop! It’s still several months away!” Athena laughingly pulled Josephine’s lists and books away.

“Athena! It is only several months away!” Ruffles tried to get her stuff back from Duchess.

“No! Go with Bull, you need a break!” Athena ran from her out in to the great hall.

I had briefly returned because I wanted to give Duchess my latest book to torment Seeker with. I looked at Duchess like she had lost her mind, “Duchess?”

“Bull has a nice, small get away planned for him and Josie, and she’s refusing to go,” Athena explained.

“There’s too much to do! I have to check with the caterers, you need dress fittings, the Commander needs his fittings, and the decorations!” Josephine followed her.

“Your trip is for four days! The wedding is still months away!” Athena shouted back as she ran out of the hall still holding on to Ruffles’ stuff, and she kept running until she came to Cullen’s office. She climbed the ladder before acknowledging anyone, dropped Josephine’s stuff off and came back down. Cullen and everyone who he was having a meeting with watched her in stunned silence. Athena blushed, “Sorry for intruding.”

“We were just finishing up,” Cullen was unsuccessfully trying to figure out what his love was up to. Cullen finished his meeting and asked after everyone had left, “What’s going on?”

“I wish Leliana was here,” Athena sighed, leaning against his desk.

"She’s coming back tomorrow…” Cullen responded to his love’s frustrated sigh, “and that has nothing to do with why you have Josephine’s stuff.”

“She is refusing to go on the trip Bull planned because of our wedding,” Athena explained, about to pace.

“And you think Leliana could convince her?” Cullen came around to stand in front of her.

“If Leliana was here Josie would be outnumbered,” she looked up into Cullen’s deep brown eyes, “I don’t want my friends putting their lives on hold for me…us.”

The door to Cullen’s office was thrown open and revealed a very irate Josephine, “Athena Trevelyan this is not becoming of being Inquisitor!”

“Maybe not, but it is becoming of a friend,” Athena was ready and willing to continue the fight.

“I’m not going, Athena! There’s too much to do,” Josephine paced.

“And that is exactly why you should go.”

“You and the Commander would be the only ones here with any authority,” Josephine was grasping at straws.

“When we went to the Arbor Wilds we left Bull and The Chargers in charge. I’m thinking Cullen and I can handle an evening,” Athena looked to Curly for support.

“I’m staying out of this one,” he shook his head.

“Coward,” Athena whispered and walked over to Ruffles, “You were so excited for this last week. What changed?” 

“One of the caterers backed out,” Josephine refused to meet Athena’s eyes.

“Josie…” Athena chided knowing that she was lying.

“He told me last night that the trip is “part of my training.” I don’t want to use a sword…” 

“Josephine, he’s been planning this trip longer than he planned proposing to you,” Cullen interjected.

Athena looked behind her and raised an eyebrow at him, “I thought you weren’t getting involved?”

Cullen walked up to her and kissed her, “I couldn’t help myself.”

“It’s going to be romantic, Josie…and if not we can have Leliana yell at him when you get back,” Athena smiled at her.

Ruffles chuckled, “I have been acting quite foolish haven’t I?”

Athena nodded, “You’re only going to be gone four days. By then Leliana will be back. Enjoy yourself, please?”

“I will. Thank you,” Josephine slightly blushed.

“If I give your stuff back to you, will you promise to take it back to your office and leave it there?” Athena asked.

“Yes, I will,” Josephine waited while Athena went to get her stuff, “Cullen, why aren’t you and Athena training to use the sword anymore?”

"It's not the right weapon for her," Cullen said quietly, not wanting to remember or give out the details.

“What do you mean?”

“I somehow managed to knock myself unconscious with a wooden sword,” Athena answered coming down the ladder with Josephine’s stuff in hand.

“How…” Ruffles paused and looked at Curly, “Do I want to know?”

“I watched it happen and I still don’t understand how,” Cullen groused (I’m thinking a bit of injured pride was speaking for him here, as he really did try to train everyone.)

“I’m talented,” Athena smiled at them.

“There you are,” Bull said as he found Ruffles, “ready to go, Kadan?”

“Let me put these away and then yes,” Josephine hooked arms with Tiny.

After the door closed, Cullen looked at Athena, "Thank you for never running away from me.”

Athena looked at him and a wicked smile lighted her lips and violet eyes as she ran for the ladder and climbed it before Curly could say or do anything. He chuckled, and playfully growled, “Woman,” and gave chase.

By the time he reached her, she was undressed and ready to hop in his bed. Cullen quickly got out of his armor and clothes, walked over to her and whispered hoarsely, “I love you.”

Athena kissed him hard and passionately. Using every ounce of her petite body’s strength she pulled Cullen down on top of her, “I love you, too.”

After they made love, our lovers came down to the dining hall to have dinner. I motioned to them, “Ruffles seemed quite eager to leave when she came back through with Tiny.”

“Good,” Athena sat down and immediately a plate of food was placed in front of her, causing her to shake her head.

I laughed, “With all the time we spent in Halamshiral, you should be used to this by now.”

Cullen sat beside her, “Old habits?”

Athena blushed and nodded, “I should be used to it by now.”

"Yes, you should be,” I quipped.

Sparkler came in and took his seat looking very shaken, (he assures me that he went home, but I doubt it.) Athena asked, “Dorian, what’s wrong?”

“Has Arthur been responding to your letters?” Dorian asked.

Athena blushed, “The last I heard from him was before I told him about losing the baby. Since then I haven’t really written to anyone…”

“That would explain why Mia is constantly asking after you,” Cullen said quietly.

"I'm sorry," Athena blushed more and looked down at her lap.

Cullen put a finger under her chin and gently lifted so she would meet his gaze, “It’s all right.”

“Athena, he would have kept in touch even if you weren’t writing to him. The last I heard from Arthur was right after and he had every intention of coming back to Skyhold. From the sound of his letter he was going to be leaving on the next boat out. My father had asked if I had heard from him lately…” Dorian trailed off.

“Are you saying that he’s missing?” Cullen was starting to worry.

“I don’t know…” Dorian paused, “He was the only one in my family that was willing to keep in touch with me. Even when I didn’t want to stay in touch with him, or them. And there’s no way he wouldn’t do everything he could to be there for Athena.”

Athena was looking down at her lap again, a veil of shining brown hair hiding her tears. Cullen put an arm around her trembling shoulders, “Did he ever make it back to Tevinter?”

“As far as I know, he was still in Ostwick when he said he would be coming back here.”

“We’ll send out a search party at first light,” Cullen quietly stated.

“Thank you, Commander,” Dorian responded.

Cullen looked at Athena, gently pulling some of her hair back, and said barely above a whisper, “Athena, why don’t we go upstairs?”

Athena nodded and stood, quickly wiping away her tears. We all wished them a good night as they headed to Duchess’ quarters. Once there, they sat on the couch cuddling, in front of a roaring fire that Curly built. While Cullen waited for Athena to say something, his thoughts drifted from thinking she was the most beautiful woman in all of Thedas to how he was going to convince her to not be part of the search party. 

Athena was listening to Cullen’s heartbeat and blaming herself for Arthur’s possible disappearance, and with a voice that cracked with emotion, “I want to help with the search efforts.”

“There are many ways you can do that…” Cullen started.

"I want to lead the search party," Athena interrupted, pulling away from his embrace to look at him.

“I don’t think that would be wise,” Cullen said as gently as he could.

“Cullen, he’s my father!” She got up to pace, “How could I not notice that he wasn’t writing to me?”

Cullen stood and walked to stand in front of where she was pacing and grabbed her arms to keep her from turning away from him, “The letters may have gotten lost somewhere, along with an explanation to Dorian’s father. You have known he’s your father for little more than a year and since Arthur left to go to Ostwick, you’ve been a bit busy.”

"Being busy isn’t an excuse. I should have kept writing," Athena said brokenly, trying to turn away from him.

“We don’t know anything yet. He may still be at Ostwick and for whatever reason hasn’t been able to write. We’ll find him, Athena,” Cullen pulled her into his arms, hoping that would reassure her.

“Why don’t you want me leading the search party?” Athena was not letting go of the idea that she should be out there searching.

“Where would you search? We have no information except that letters haven’t been received. We’ll talk to Leliana as soon as she gets back and send a contingent to Ostwick at first light,” Cullen paused, “Did you want to postpone the wedding?”

Athena looked up at him, shocked, “Of course not! Why would you ask that?”

“Because going to and from Ostwick would bring you perilously close to missing it,” Cullen stated quietly.

Athena sighed, remembering how long it took her to get from Ostwick to Haven, “It seems so long ago now, almost like it was a dream.”

Cullen chuckled, “Saving the world has that affect.”

“So does falling in love,” Athena smiled and kissed him, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I promise you that we will find Arthur,” Cullen picked her up and carried her to the bed. He teased as he dropped her on it, “I think I’m going to rip that dress off of you.”

Athena quickly rolled off and put the bed as a barrier between them, “Don’t you dare! I like this dress!”

Cullen laughed, undressing and getting in to bed, “You can’t fight dragons in it. It’s expendable.”

“It is not! It’s the only article of clothing I have that matches my eyes!” Duchess took off the dress and gently placed it in her wardrobe.

Cullen shook his head, “I’m sure Josephine can find you more.”

Climbing in to bed with him she said, “Besides my wedding dress she’s told me I cannot have any new clothing until you stop destroying it.”

“I’m only to blame for three pieces… How many pieces of clothing has Bull destroyed of hers?” Cullen wrapped a strong arm around her.

“She wouldn’t tell me,” Athena chuckled. 

Cullen silenced her with a kiss, and they made love.

**

Athena was up and dressed before the sun broke over the mountains, anxious to talk to Leliana, and get the search party on its way to Ostwick. Wearing a sea green dress she stood on the balcony to greet the sun, the wind whipped through her hair and around her dress with the on coming smell of rain in the air. Cullen started calling out in his sleep again and Athena went to him and whispered in his ear that she loved him, trusted him, couldn’t wait to marry him… anything she could think of to pull him out of his dreams. Eventually he opened his eyes and whispered, “Morning.”

Athena smiled at him and whispered the same. She leaned down to gently kiss him. Before they could get any further there was a knock at the door.

Athena sighed and got up to answer it. On the other side stood Nightingale. Athena smiled and hugged her, “How are you?”

“Where’s Josie?” Leliana avoided Duchess’ question.

“She’s on her trip with Bull…” Athena paused, sensing something was off, “Leliana, what’s going on?”

"Come to the war room when you and the Commander are ready,” Leliana melted in to the inky blackness of the stairwell as the sun had yet to show itself. 

Athena walked back up the stairs and saw that Cullen was already half dressed. Athena said softly, “I may not ever get used to having food put in front of me as soon as I take my seat, but I’m too used to this.”

Cullen kissed her and took her hand once he finished dressing and they walked down to the war room. Before they reached it Curly stopped to talk to Darius and had him gather up soldiers for a search party to Ostwick. They entered the war room to see Leliana pacing. Athena asked, “Leliana?”

Nightingale sighed, “We’ve been asked to help investigate the possible last place Inquisitor Ameridan had been over eight hundred years ago. There are several rifts in the area and there is a group of Avaar there called the Jaws of Hakkon that are trying to raise a god.”

“You want me to leave now?” Athena sighed and looked at Cullen.

“It should only take a month total, if you leave within the next day or two,” Leliana answered.

“Where will she be going?” Cullen worried about Athena’s state of mind.

“The Frostback Basin. Scout Harding is already there and helping out the researcher. Cassandra has said she would meet you there.”

“But doesn’t she have a coronation thing to do soon?” Athena questioned.

“That’s in a couple months and they’re still fighting her about being a married woman,” Leliana chuckled.

“Is Rylen coming with her?”

“No, he is staying behind…” Leliana replied.

“To do what?” Cullen found it odd that Rylen didn’t want to stay with Cassandra.

“I’m not sure. Something to do with proving himself…” Leliana responded.

“Weird. You do realize that when Josie comes back she will go into full blown panic mode?” Athena asked.

Nightingale laughed, “I’ll do my best to keep her calm.”

“There’s one other issue…” Cullen spoke so Athena didn’t have to.

“What issue?” Leliana had a feeling that she wasn’t going to like this.

“Arthur hasn’t been heard from in months. The last word we had from him was that he was still in Ostwick and would be returning to Skyhold before heading home to Tevinter,” Cullen explained taking hold of both of Athena’s hands. 

“I’ll get my agents on it right away. We’ll find him, Athena,” Leliana reassured her.

“Can we have a moment, Leliana?” Athena asked not breaking her gaze from Cullen.

“Certainly,” Leliana bowed out of the room to let our lovers talk.

“Cullen, I-“ Athena started, but couldn’t finish because Curly had pulled her in to his arms and came close to crushing her in his embrace. They held each other quietly for several minutes. Athena was the first to try to pull away, “I need to find out who’s willing to go with me.”

“I know… I just…” Cullen paused and sighed, “sending you away always get harder. Allow me to hold you for just a little longer?”

“If you let me do this now, we will have the rest of the day,” Athena said. However, she was still rooted to the spot and holding on to him as tightly as he was holding on to her.

Cullen finally released her, and said softly, “Go… Ask Morrigan to go with you?”

“Morrigan?” Athena questioned. She was surprised that Cullen was suggesting someone to go with her and completely shocked that it was Morrigan that was being recommended.

“We’ve been… Talking more,” Cullen paused, blushed, and cleared his throat, “she really does care for you.”

Athena chuckled softly and kissed him, “I’ll ask her.”

Cullen closed his eyes when she kissed him and groaned, “Athena, if you don’t go now, I’ll never let you leave.”

Athena laughed softly, “As fun as that would be…” she kissed him and whispered, “my chambers or yours?”

“Yours,” Cullen answered, “if you’re not back in an hour, I will be searching for you.”

“It’s a good thing I’m expecting yeses from those I’m asking,” Athena smiled at him and left. She asked me, of course I said yes. She also asked Sparkler, he moaned about it but agreed. Athena went out to the garden to find Morrigan, and Kieran tackled her. Athena laughed getting up from the ground, and gently chided, “You’re lucky I’m tough.” Kieran smiled and ran away to play with Ana.

“Your love has created a monster in my son,” Morrigan teased.

“He’s taken to weapon training well?” Athena asked.

“He has, ‘tis terrifying,” Morrigan smiled. The smile faded as she noticed the sadness creeping in as Athena watched the children play. “Athena?”

“My father may be missing and tomorrow I leave to track down Inquisitor Ameridan’s last known where abouts.”

“What about the wedding?” Morrigan asked as they walked the garden.

“Leliana says I should be back with time to spare,” Athena answered, “Would you be willing to come with me?”

“The reason you are asking is…” Morrigan trailed off.

“Because I trust you, and I am quite curious to find out what you and Cullen have been talking about,” Athena finished, raising an eyebrow at her friend.

Morrigan chuckled, “You know me so well that I would divulge private conversations?”

“Considering how you two antagonized each other before… Only to have Cullen ask me to take you with me to do this? Yes, you’re going to tell me,” Athena smiled sweetly.

Morrigan mockingly sighed, “If I must. Let me make arrangements for Kieran and I will join you on your hunt for this Inquisitor Ameridan.”

“Thank you,” Athena answered and snuck Kieran and Ana brownies as she left.

Only to hear Morrigan call out as she opened the door to go back in, “Inquisitor!” 

Athena laughed in response as she closed the great oaken door behind her. Of course, on Duchess’ way to her chambers, everyone had to stop her to talk to her about anything and everything under the sun. So much so that, Cullen came looking for her. She was standing in front of her throne talking to two nobles about how she should heal the scar in the sky. Athena said as gently as she could, “If it were in my power to do so, I would. Now, if you’ll please excuse me, I have an important meeting to get to.”

“But the weather is acting so strangely today…. Surely, you can make the sun shine again?” The male noble asked.

Athena sighed in frustration. She had her back to the door to her quarters so she didn’t see Curly come down and continued to attempt to extricate herself from the conversation, “I cannot control the weather, nor do I want to. We need rain, it makes things grow. I am leaving for a month on the morrow and I really have things I need to do. If you’ll excuse me?”

“Ah, our fine Commander! Can you believe that the Inquisitor cannot change the weather?” The lady noble asked.

“The Inquisitor and I have an important meeting to get to,” Cullen’s tone said that he would brook no arguments and took Athena by the hand, pulling her away from them.

The lady noble gasped and the male noble chided, “What ungentlemanly behavior from our Commander!” I couldn’t help but laugh.

On the other side of the door, Cullen teased, “You took longer than an hour.”

“What I had set out to do took all of fifteen minutes. And then I was asked to change this and why can’t you do that?” Athena mocked and gave an aggravated sigh, “One actually said to me that the sky should be pink instead of blue and because I cannot change the sky’s color to his liking, I shouldn't be Inquisitor any more.”

"And you wonder why I have no patience for nobles,” Cullen smirked.

“I never wondered, I was just shocked that you didn’t see that in me,” Athena said quietly, staring in to his warm brown eyes. They truly lit up like the sun warming the Earth whenever he looked at his lady love.

“Because you’re not like them. You are kind, caring, thoughtful, and beautiful,” Cullen smiled mischievously, “I’m pretty certain you’re all right with the sky being blue… Unless you change it to match the color of your eyes.” He pulled her close to him, and kissed her passionately. When they finished, he whispered, “You are also everything to me.”

Athena wrapped herself around him and whispered fiercely, “I love you.” 

Cullen picked her up and carried her to the bed while kissing her. Quickly taking off their clothing he responded hoarsely, “I love you, too.”

After their passions were sated Athena was laying on Cullen’s chest listening to his heartbeat. Cullen had an arm wrapped around her exposed shoulder and was caressing her arm with his fingers. Curly’s other arm was acting as a pillow between the headboard and his head. Athena sighed contentedly causing Cullen to smile. And then there was a knock on the door which Athena answered with a mumbled, “go away.” Cullen chuckled, and moved to get out from underneath her. Duchess clung to him shaking her head, “I don’t care and I don’t want to know.”

“It’s probably just lunch,” Cullen gently removed himself from her grip.

She huffed as she flipped to her back to watch Curly put on pants, “We should have stayed in the war room.”

Cullen laughed as he went down the stairs to answer the door. When he came back up he showed her the tray of food, “I told you it was just lunch.”

Athena got on all fours and said seductively, “I’m not hungry for food.”

“No?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her as he put the tray down. With a sultry smile she shook her head as her hair fell forward obscuring his view, Curly commented softly as he walked back over to the bed, “I think I finally see your point about your hair.”

Athena pounced on him when he sat down, and whispered, “I’ll cut it if you want me to.”

“Never,” he used the not so offending object as handholds to tilt her head back to kiss her and they made love again with lunch forgotten.

Hours later they finally made it out of bed and were cuddling in front of the fire Cullen built. Athena lightheartedly said, “Unlike putting together cots, I do know how to make a fire.”

“Maker’s breath. After knocking yourself unconscious with a wooden sword, I’m afraid to let you near anything that has to do with wood.”

Athena chuckled, “I wasn’t completely out. I heard you calling for me.”

“That’s not exactly comforting,” Cullen griped, causing her to laugh.

“I’m sorry, my love, but I think it’s safest for all of us if I just stick with magic,” Athena took hold of Cullen’s hand that was being propped up by her shoulder.

Cullen sat up, just realizing something, “Athena, did you…”

Athena looked up at him, “When the sword flew out of my hand, it was heading straight for Ana…”

“And you?” Cullen relaxed again, and then sat forward thinking that this meant she wasn’t able to control her magic anymore.

“Tried to stop it before it hurt her,” Athena answered, “as I was about to let it drop, the wind caught it…”

Cullen chuckled helplessly, "And it came back to hit you. Thank you for at least trying.”

Athena kissed him and snuggled back down with her head on his chest, “You’re welcome.”

“What would you like to do for dinner?” He asked.

“Eat our lunch,” Athena quipped.

Cullen chuckled, “I don’t think that’s possible anymore.”

“Why not?” Athena was confused, and looked up at him again. 

"You didn’t notice that the servants came and took away the tray of food?” Cullen found this odd as Duchess was usually a very light sleeper.

“No! When was this?” Athena sat up.

“A couple hours ago,” Cullen laughed.

“I don’t remember falling asleep…” Athena trailed off as she got comfortable again.

“You jumped when they closed the door,” Cullen was still amazed that she slept through the noisy servants.

Athena shrugged, and smiled up at him, “I guess you tired me out.”

He leaned down to kiss her, “I’d be happy to do it again.”

"I thought you were hungry?” She wondered why he brought up dinner if he wasn’t hungry (oh, to be that naïve again.)

“Not for food,” he whispered, leaning her backwards and kissing her. Aaaannnnddd they made love again (are you getting the feeling they’re trying to cram a month’s worth of time in to a day? ….Yeah, me too.)

**

The next morning dawned with Athena having a last minute meeting with Nightingale. Cullen was in Skyhold’s chantry, praying, and that is where Duchess found him. When he finished his prayer, she said softly, “Cullen?”

He turned to face her and opened his arms, she ran into them and said, “This time I’m not facing a dark spawn magister from the dawn of time.”

Cullen chuckled, “I can still pray for your safety.”

Athena sighed, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“I know. Please be safe?” He wanted to make her promise but he chose to hug her tighter instead.

“I will try my best,” Athena smiled gently, “I have a few more lucky pieces to see me through.”

“One of them is a promise…” Cullen reminded her softly as he took Duchess’ left hand in his and rubbed a finger over the ring she was wearing.

“A promise I can’t wait to fulfill,” Athena kissed him, fighting tears, “I love you, Cullen.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen whispered to hide the emotion he was feeling. Clearing his throat he said, “We should get you to the gate.”

Athena closed her eyes against the tears and whispered, “Just a couple minutes longer?” In response Cullen held her even tighter and fought against his own tears.

They walked hand in hand to the gate, and Athena saw some soldiers mounting up to ride with us, “Cullen?”

“It’s only a small contingent to see that you reach the Basin safely,” Cullen waved to the leader of the forces.

“Considering most of us are leaving our loves behind, I don’t think we will be getting into that much trouble,” Athena half joked.

“Just be happy it’s only ten people instead of half of the Inquisition army,” Cullen griped.

Athena stopped, “Is that an option?”

“Do you think you need that many?” Cullen stopped with her, suddenly worried.

“No, but if half the army comes with me…” Athena led Curly to what she was thinking.

“I would be able to come,” Cullen sighed, “I am sorry, Athena. Half of the army isn’t available right now.” 

She kissed him to say he had nothing to apologize for, “It was just a thought.”

They walked up to us quietly holding hands. I asked, “Ready, Duchess?”

She turned and kissed Curly for all she was worth. With tears deepening the violet of her eyes, she turned away from her love to get on her horse. She nodded to the rest of us and we moved out.

**

It took three days to get to the Frostback Basin. If it wasn’t for almost certain death from large spiders and other weird beasts, the place would be a paradise. We met Scout Harding there and she gave us an update on the place. Scout Harding also introduced us to a Professor Kenric who was investigating Inquisitor Ameridan’s whereabouts. So we started chasing down his leads and fighting Hakkon. We also allied with another Avaar tribe. About a week in Athena received a bunch of letters. Morrigan asked, “Who would write you that much?”

“Cullen’s sister… But normally they just put them on my desk in Skyhold until I get back,” Athena untied one of three stacks and opened one. She gasped in surprise and tears shined in her eyes. 

"I think we can all guess as to who they’re from. Duchess, go to your tent,” I ordered quietly. Athena looked at me like she was just woken up out of a deep sleep. I responded to her look, “Enjoy your letters.”

She gathered them like they were more precious than gold and ran to her tent. Morrigan asked, “The Commander hasn’t written to her before?”

I chuckled, “He always claimed that he didn’t have time. And I’m willing to bet that he’s not the one that sent them to Athena.”

“When we get back, Leliana needs to know how grateful we are,” Sparkler commented.

“She’s not that bad,” Cassandra defended Duchess.

“She, at least talks to us, unlike you Seeker,” I quipped.

Cassandra gasped, “What do you think I’m doing now?” 

Athena laid on her cot (Sparkler and I set it up for her,) reading the first letter from Cullen. It read: Athena,   
Maker knows I’m not very good at writing letters and it’s small consolation that you will never see these. However, it was impressed upon me that instead of pacing I should try to write you instead. So here is my attempt. You are amazing and beautiful and there are so many things I want to do with you when this war is over. Cullen

Athena smiled through her tears and picked up the next letter, and the next, and so on. Sparkler finally yelled, "Save some of those letters for tomorrow night. The Commander would not be happy to hear that you spent a sleepless night because of him.”

"Goodnight, Dorian,” Athena said and snuffed out her light.

**

We defeated the Hakkon with help from the allied Avaar tribe. We also found Inquisitor Ameridan, who had been frozen in time with a dragon. Ameridan had not realized that eight hundred years had passed and once he did he faded away. We fought and defeated the dragon Ameridan had been frozen in time with and Athena had to judge a bear… Which meant the Inquisition got a temporary pet bear…(Only Duchess would think it was a good idea to keep a bear for a pet.)

On our last day there, Athena had another letter from Cullen, this one was far more recent than the others, it read: Inquisitor, your father has returned to Skyhold unharmed and awaits your safe return. We all await your safe return. Commander Cullen

Duchess was kind enough to read that one out loud to us. Sparkler breathed a sigh of relief hearing that his uncle was safe, “Thank the Maker.”

“We leave for Skyhold at first light tomorrow,” Athena informed us and disappeared in to her tent to read more letters from Cullen, she had by now received several stacks of letters.

"You used to yell at her for disappearing in to her tent to read,” Seeker said (I think she was kind of jealous.)

“That’s because she was usually reading my books,” I responded.

“It’s different that the Commander is writing to her?” Cassandra asked.

“You don’t have Nightingale to go through Rylen’s things or you would be getting them from him too,” I offered, hoping to calm the look in Seeker’s eyes.


	39. Chapter 39

When Tiny and Ruffles came back from their trip, Ruffles immediately started looking for Athena. Instead, she found Curly in his office, “Where’s Athena?”

“Leliana didn’t tell you?” Cullen asked, thinking that the first stop the Ambassador would make was to her friend.

“We’re not to meet until later today. She said that there was something she needed to do that took precedence,” Josephine answered.

“Athena is in the Frostback Basin, trying to find out what happened to Inquisitor Ameridan,” Cullen answered, “Did Leliana say what was keeping her?”

“Something about Dorian’s uncle….” Ruffles paused, realization dawning, “What do you mean she’s in the Frostback Basin?! When is she to return?! Your wedding is not that far away!”

“Josephine, Athena’s father is also missing. I need to talk to Leliana,” Cullen ushered her out the door.

“What do you mean he’s missing? I was gone for four days!” She exclaimed.

“He hasn’t been heard from in months and we found out the night you left that he hadn’t reached Tevinter as was the original plan,” Cullen explained, hurriedly.

"The original plan?" Ruffles was hopelessly lost.

“Dorian said that Arthur had said he would be coming back here instead of going back to Tevinter,” he answered as they walked through the library to get to Leliana.

“Why?” 

"Athena told him about losing the baby and he wanted to be here for her,” Cullen quietly informed her. Talking about their loss was still a touchy subject for him.

“Why isn’t she out searching for him?” Josephine asked.

Cullen smiled sadly, “She didn’t want to postpone the wedding.”

“And going to the Frostback Basin isn’t going to do that?” Ruffles was slightly irritated.

“She wasn’t given a choice and according to Leliana, no,” Cullen motioned to Leliana.

"Commander?” Leliana walked over to them.

“Josephine said that you couldn’t meet her until later in the day because of something to do with Arthur?” 

“We found something, I’m just not sure what it is. He did leave Ostwick, but then he went to Fereldan’s circle tower,” Leliana responded.

“Why?” Cullen found that to be peculiar. What would be so important to go to Fereldan’s Circle?

“That’s what we’re trying to figure out,” Leliana looked at Ruffles, who was doing her best to not fume at her friend… At least until Curly walked away.

“Is there anything I should look over?” He asked. Leliana handed him the reports she had. 

Ruffles was close to boiling, “You sent Athena to the Frostback Basin with her wedding being mere months away?”

“I had to, Josie, and she will be back before the wedding. Morrigan is with her," Nightingale informed her.

“And why would that comfort me?” Josephine asked imperiously.

“Morrigan’s a shapeshifter. She’ll get Athena back in time for the wedding,” Leliana chuckled.

"Phylactery?” Cullen mumbled to himself. Then he closed his eyes and sighed, “He’s chasing down Athena’s phylactery… But why would it be at Kinloch Hold?”

“Commander?” Leliana heard him mumble.

“Arthur is looking for Athena’s phylactery. What I don’t understand is why he thinks it would be at Fereldan’s circle tower,” Cullen continued reading.

“Maybe it was held there to keep her safe from Bernard?” Josephine offered.

“Maybe…” Cullen trailed off, “Most of them are held in Denerim though.”

"Why is the phylactery important?” Ruffles asked.

“Templars use it to track mages when they become apostates… It also may be possible to cast spells over the phylactery to control the mage,” Cullen informed them.

“We find Athena’s phylactery, we find Arthur,” Leliana said quietly.

“It needs to be destroyed,” Cullen’s voice had a hard edge to it. He did not like the idea of someone getting to Athena’s phylactery and hurting her with it. He put down the report and began to pace.

“I think we’re all in agreement with that, but ultimately it is Athena’s decision,” Josephine reminded him.

“You don’t think Arthur would try to do anything with it, do you?” Leliana questioned as she watched Curly pace. 

“I doubt it, but I would rather that we find it first,” Cullen replied.

“Who do you want to bring it back?” Leliana asked. Cullen stopped pacing and looked squarely at her. She guessed, “You want to go and get it.”

“I do. Besides you and Josephine, the only person I would trust with it is Darius,” Cullen answered.

“We have two places to search…” Josephine trailed off.

Cullen sighed, “Darius and I will go to the Circle tower.”

"Are you sure about this, Cullen?” Leliana was worried for him.

“Maybe we should wait until Athena gets back…” Josephine suggested.

"It's the last known whereabouts of Arthur and I can get in and out of the tower quickly,” Cullen was already mapping out a plan in his head.

“I think Josephine is right, and that we should wait until Athena gets back,” Leliana took note that Cullen already had a far away look to his brown eyes.

“And what of Arthur?” Cullen was pulled back to the present.

“Let me send agents first to determine the whereabouts of her phylactery and Arthur,” Leliana tried to appease Cullen.

“Unnamed agents searching for something that could potentially control or harm the Inquisitor?” Cullen scoffed at the idea.

“They don’t need to know it’s hers,” Josephine said in support of Nightingale’s idea.

“I’m going,” Cullen was angry.

“Cullen, you were tortured there. Go to Denerim instead,” Leliana suggested.

“I wouldn’t be back in time,” Cullen went back to pacing, “We ask Athena to face her fears and do things she detests on an almost daily basis. How can I do any less for the woman I love?”

“Because I’m certain she would not want you doing this on your own. She would want to be with you. We don’t ask her to face places that she was tortured at,” Leliana responded.

“How many times did we ask her to go back to the Temple of Sacred Ashes?” Cullen argued.

“She wasn’t tortured there,” Leliana said emphatically.

“No, but she was thrown in to and out of the Fade, then we asked her to continuously go back to slow and stop the breach, and then to face Corypheus. She did it all without complaining or showing any fear,” Cullen reminded them.

“I can send messengers to my agents near the circle tower and they can see if Arthur is there. They will be able to get there faster than you would be. There will be no mention of Athena’s phylactery,” Leliana implored.

“How can the phylactery be used to track mages?” Josephine asked. She knew of phylacteries but not how they worked.

Cullen closed his eyes, conceding that Leliana was right, “They glow the closer you get to the Mage it belongs to.”

“Wouldn’t Athena need to be along to find it?” Ruffles still tried to get Cullen to wait.

“They label them, Josephine,” Cullen looked askance at Josephine.

"But it would be easier,” Leliana supported her friend’s idea.

“And if Arthur already has it, how do we get it away from him?” 

“I’m sure we’ll find a way,” Leliana smiled, “Are we agreed that I send my messengers to my agents near the circle tower?” 

“For now,” Cullen left to go to the sparring ring. He needed to hit many things.

**

A week went by with Curly pestering Nightingale almost hourly if she had heard anything from her agents. Cullen was having a meeting with Darius, “At first light I’m going to Fereldan’s circle to at least find out Arthur’s next move and hopefully Athena’s phylactery. I would like you to go with me.”

“I’m willing to go, but, why aren’t you willing to wait for Athena?” Darius questioned.

“I don’t understand why Arthur wouldn’t tell her that he was looking for it. What does he plan to do with it once he has it?” Cullen asked rhetorically.

“What would you do with it?” Darius sat down across from Cullen who was pacing behind his desk.

“I’d keep it safe until I could give it to Athena,” Cullen answered.

“You don’t think Arthur would do the same?” 

“Which is more important? Finding her phylactery or helping her through a difficult time?” The hard edge in Cullen’s voice showed how irritated he was with Athena’s father.

“You’ll be able to ask him at dinner,” Leliana said as she came in to Curly’s office.

“Where was he?” Cullen held his breath. 

“He was about to leave for Denerim. He wasn’t able to get to the Fereldan circle at all, and spent the past week trying to get there,” Leliana replied.

“Thank the Maker,” Cullen breathed a sigh of relief.

“When he gets here, would you be able to distract him so we can search his stuff?” Leliana requested.

“If he has it do you really think he would bring it here and hide it?” Darius questioned.

“He didn’t tell anyone that he was looking for it… That worries me,” Leliana said quietly.

“Are we still leaving for the circle tomorrow, Commander?” Darius stood.

“No, I’ll wait for Athena to come back first,” Cullen answered.

“Good,” Leliana smiled briefly, “Now will you stop pacing?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “Yes.”

“Enjoy your day, gentleman,” Leliana left.

"I'm going to try to wrest Ana away from Kieran and Mother Giselle for lunch, would you like to join us?” Darius offered.

“I think I can distract Kieran long enough for you two to have some father/daughter time,” Cullen winked at his friend.

“You seem to be quite fond of him,” Darius commented as they left Curly’s office.

“I am, he’s a good kid.” Kieran and Cullen had lunch and played chess. Kieran won, repeatedly, and then they practiced with swords until Mother Giselle came searching for him. Cullen went to the sparring ring until Arthur arrived. 

“Commander?” Arthur walked up to the ring.

Cullen stopped sparring with one of his soldiers and thanked them. He walked out to greet Athena’s father. “Hello, Arthur.”

“Where is Athena?” Arthur asked as they walked to Cullen’s office.

"She's in the Frostback Basin on Inquisition business,” Cullen’s answer was short. He was wary of why Arthur didn’t come back when Athena needed him.

"Did something happen between you two?” Arthur was concerned.

“No, why would you think that?” Cullen offered a drink to him.

“This couldn’t wait until after the wedding?” Arthur accepted the glass Cullen had poured for him.

“Unfortunately not.”

“Will she be back in time?” 

"From what she's written me, it sounds as though everything is going according to her plan and she should be back in plenty of time.” Cullen took a sip of his drink, “Why were you looking for Athena’s phylactery?”

“It doesn’t worry you that she could be hunted down because of this form of blood magic?” Arthur was very worried.

“She is hunted because she is a great many things to a great many people. That doesn’t explain your interest in it. Nor does it explain why you didn’t tell anyone,” Cullen let some of his aggravation show through.

"I'm her father, Cullen. I couldn't be there for her like I wanted to be while she was growing up, but I would like to be there for her now. As for why I didn’t tell anyone, I wanted to allay my own fears before worrying anyone else,” Arthur sat down.

"How does being there for her equate to not writing to her for months after she told you that our baby was lost?” Cullen interrogated, not accepting Arthur’s explanation.

"I never stopped writing to her or Dorian. Is that why I was escorted here?” Arthur was not pleased with this development.

“We thought you were missing. Dorian’s father asked after you…” Cullen changed tactics, “Dorian said that you had planned to return to Skyhold as soon as you could get a boat out of Ostwick. Why did that plan change?” 

“My brother asked about me?” Arthur didn’t expect an answer but Curly shrugged in response, “I found more of Lydia’s journals at Ostwick. She had talked of a Templar claiming he had used a phylactery to cause a miscarriage. I didn’t read that part until after I had sent my letter to Dorian. I did write to tell him that my plans had changed…. Now I understand why I didn’t get incessant questions from him.”

“You were thinking someone was using Athena’s phylactery against her…” Cullen sighed and began pacing. Arthur nodded to Cullen’s statement, “Did you receive letters from here? Did you bring Lydia’s journals here?”

Arthur thought a moment, “After Athena’s letter about the baby, they did stop. I had just assumed that she didn’t feel like writing and Dorian has always written sporadically… And yes, Lydia’s journals are in with my belongings.”

"Why do you think that Athena’s phylactery is being held at the Circle tower?”

“It’s not that I think it. Before I left I had it sent there, so no one would be able to find it… Except me,” Arthur said, sadly.

“Why?” 

“To protect Athena from any who would want to harm her. Lydia and I fought over it. If I wanted Athena protected that badly, why create a phylactery at all? But I was terrified that someone would try to take her and I wanted a way to find her,” Arthur got up to walk to the other side of Cullen’s office.

"Why are you the only one that can find it?” Cullen still found the entire situation odd.

“Until now only Lydia and I knew it’s location,” Arthur responded quietly, lost in the memories of his youth. Shaking off the memories he looked directly at Cullen, “It needs to be destroyed.”

“That’s Athena’s decision to make,” Cullen stated.

"Why?” Arthur asked as though the word was ripped out of him.

“You know as well as I do that it’s a part of her and to destroy something that is part of her, no matter how I feel about it, is not my decision to make,” Cullen’s voice was quiet steel.

"What if she doesn't want to make the decision?" 

“She always makes one eventually,” Cullen smiled, having absolute faith in his fiancee.

Arthur despondently sighed, "You would know better than I.”

There was a knock on the door, “Commander? You need to come see this.”

Cullen sighed, “I will be there in a minute. Dorian is with Athena in the Frostback Basin, but I can introduce you to my second in command…”

“That’s all right, I think I’ll go unpack. Do you want to read Lydia’s journals?” Arthur asked.

“Yes,” Cullen walked out with Arthur. 

“I’ll bring them to you in the morning,” Arthur and Curly parted ways. 

Cullen went down to the main gate to see some of Leliana’s agents walking with a bear. He chuckled helplessly. Leliana appeared beside him, “Why do we have a bear in Skyhold?”

“The same reason you got a nug in Haven,” Cullen grinned.

“Commander, there’s a note on the bear… And it’s addressed to you,” one of the agents said, utterly failing to hide their terror.

“The bear appears to be tame, grab the note,” Cullen responded.

“I… I just remembered… I have duties I need to attend to…” The agent squeaked out and ran.

“That doesn’t speak well of your agents,” Curly teased Nightingale.

“Your soldiers are giving the bear a wide berth too,” She rejoined.

“Why is there a bear walking through the front gate of Skyhold?!” Ruffles exclaimed as she joined Cullen and Leliana.

“The Commander was just about to find out,” Leliana smirked. Cullen growled. Leliana snickered, “Good, you even speak its language.”

Curly walked gingerly up to the bear. To greet him the bear stood on her hind legs and hugged him, nuzzling and snuffing at the fur on his armor (Sweet Andraste, I wish I had been there to see that.) Once the bear released her hold on him he grabbed for the note that was tied around her neck. It read: My love, I wanted a pet. Leliana even suggested I should get one after the war was over. I hope you don’t mind that it’s a bear. She’s really sweet and loves chocolate. Her name is Storvacker. Kieran and Ana will get a kick out of her. Another week and I should be home. I miss you. Love, Athena

"Well, Commander, what's the reason?" Josephine asked, nervously.

“The Inquisitor wanted a pet, and Leliana encouraged her to get one,” Cullen smirked as he walked back up to them and pocketed the letter to read again later.

"A bear!" Two little voices shouted rushing past Curly to hug and ride the bear.

“Andraste preserve us all,” Ruffles murmured.

“When we had that conversation I was thinking a cat, fennec, or a dog… Not... A… Bear,” Leliana responded.

“Where are we going to keep her?” Josephine was bewildered.

Cullen chuckled, “That’s up to you, Lady Ambassador. The Inquisitor said the bear loves chocolate.” Ruffles growled. Cullen laughed and offered a parting shot, “I’m not the only one that speaks bear.”

**

Two days later a young lady showed up at Skyhold where her body was host to more than one spirit. The lady and her teacher (again, one body, two spirits) were now agent(s?) for the Inquisition. Cullen was not happy and pretty much snapped at everyone until we came home. 

"The war ends and he stops pacing for you at the gate?" Dorian tsked.

“Maybe I can get a bath first…” Athena hoped… And then she saw Nightingale standing on the stairs to the keep, and groaned, “there goes the idea of a bath.”

Morrigan chuckled, “This may not be as luxurious as a bath but…” she motioned with her hand and got all the travel dirt, blood, and gore off of Athena’s armor.

“Thank you, Morrigan.”

“Where is Curly?” I was confused by his absence, “a month goes by without you two seeing each other and he’s not here?”

“He might be upset with me, I didn’t really explain why I sent Segrid here,” Athena offered.

“I don’t like it, but I understand your reasons,” I hoped to ease the battle that was to come.

“Thank you, Varric,” Athena smiled.

“Why couldn’t you just learn about the ritual from the augur?” Seeker asked.

“Is the augur going to come to Skyhold every time someone wants to perform this ritual? I doubt he would. If there’s to be any hope of helping all people, we need to use whatever tools we have,” Athena explained.

“We killed the Inquisition scout, for the same thing you’re letting Segrid stay,” Cassandra argued.

“Who has Segrid killed? Has Segrid made any mention of wanting vengeance or desiring revenge? Do you really think his bloodlust would have ended with the Jaws of Hakkon’s defeat?” Athena effectively silenced Seeker’s argument with her questions.

“You are very wise, Inquisitor. I am proud to call you friend,” Morrigan quietly informed her.

Kieran ran up to his mom and exclaimed, “Mother, the Inquisitor sent a bear back! Do you think she’ll be able to keep it?”

Morrigan chuckled, “My son, we will tell the Inquisitor all about the bear later. Right now she has a love to find and work to do.”

“The Commander is sparring with Athena’s father. Can we watch?” Kieran excitedly asked.

“Andraste save me,” Athena groaned causing the rest of us to laugh.

“Yes, we can watch,” Morrigan answered.

Athena started to head in to the keep. Sparkler and I each grabbed an arm, I chuckled, “Oh no, Duchess, you’re not getting out of this.”

“I have to watch your love beat up mine on an almost daily basis,” Dorian informed her.

“If your love has an issue with it, maybe he shouldn’t say yes or be second in command,” Athena shot back.

“The Commander could let him win once in a while,” Sparkler moaned.

“And Darius should wait for an answer before walking in to Cullen’s office,” Athena griped.

“He only did that once,” Sparkler grumbled.

“That you were witness to,” Duchess mumbled, a blush stealing in to her cheeks.

I laughed, “Are you two sure you’re not brother and sister?”

“Varric! It’s bad enough they’re cousins,” Curly yelled from the ring… He had Arthur in a headlock.

Athena tried to turn away, we wouldn’t let her. She closed her eyes and turned her head, “I really don’t want to see this.”

Cullen noticed who were holding on to and was rewarded by being flipped to the ground. Laughing he got up, “I forfeit, Arthur.”

“You’ll forfeit to Arthur, Kieran, and Ana… But you won’t forfeit to Darius! And you’ve known him longest!” Sparkler released Athena’s arm.

Arthur laughed as he put an arm around Dorian’s shoulders, “ Let it go, Dorian, he can’t hear you anyway.”

Our lovers were staring deeply into each others eyes. I coughed, breaking their reverie, “Before I release Duchess’ arm,” for which I got a sidelong glance from her, “Why weren’t you pacing at the gate?”

“I had to keep Arthur entertained,” Cullen barely glanced at me. He only had eyes for Athena.

Arthur shook his head, “You have no idea how wearying it is to watch you pace.”

I released Athena’s arm, chuckling at Curly’s blush, “It’s good to be back.”

Coming out of the ring, Cullen opened his arms and Athena flew into them. They kissed each other for what seemed like forever to the rest of us. Ana and Kieran got anxious and asked to see the bear, we all followed the kids. Once the kiss ended Cullen asked quietly, “A bear for a pet?”

“She saved my life. The Avaar wanted me to judge her. They want her back, eventually.”

“And Segrid?” Cullen raised an eyebrow. He was showing an odd amount of restraint, considering the anger Leliana and Josephine had been subjected to.

“There’s a ritual the Avaar have that can separate a fade spirit from a human one. She knows how to perform it safely, and unlike Anders’s incantation it puts no one in harm’s way,” Athena answered.

“How much of this has to do with Anders?” They walked hand in hand to the keep.

“If he ever desires help I want to be able to help him, or at least understand him. Initially his intentions were good ones. No one should have good intentions turned against them,” Athena said quietly to hide the lump forming in her throat.

“Athena?” Cullen stopped and stood in front of her, hearing the catch in her voice.

“There was an Inquisition scout that was a lot like Segrid… But he murdered people and he wasn’t going to stop…” Athena’s violet eyes filled with tears.

Cullen pulled her into his arms, held her and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“So am I,” She brokenly whispered.

“You did what you thought was right. No one can ask more than that,” Cullen murmured into her hair, kissing the top of her head.

Athena shuddered out a sigh and changed the subject, “I know Leliana wants to talk.”

“Are you all right?” Cullen was of the opinion that Leliana could wait. They pulled away from each other just enough to look in to each others eyes.

“I am now,” Athena smiled at him, wiping her tears away.

“Liar,” Cullen quietly accused.

“If that will get us through this meeting, me a bath, and to spend time with you… I’ll accept that,” Athena responded.

Cullen shook his head and chuckled as they walked to the war room, “Then we should get work out of the way.”

Athena told them all about the Basin, with Leliana smiling knowingly, which Athena caught on to and complained, “Why do I even bother giving reports when you already know everything, Leliana?”

“I didn’t know about the bear… Or Segrid,” Leliana griped.

“You mean for once your agents actually listened to me?” Athena smirked.

“What do you mean?” Leliana drew out each word.

“They knew I was sending the bear back. I’m surprised it wasn’t reported,” Athena was pleased.

“Well, you now have the bear to compete with for the Commander’s affection,” Leliana teased.

“What’s this?” Athena chuckled and glanced at Cullen.

“Yes… Well…” Cullen coughed and blushed, “the Inquisitor has nothing to worry about.”

“He was wrestling her yesterday,” Josephine interjected.

“With Kieran and Ana!” Cullen blushed brighter.

“Likely excuse,” Leliana chuckled.

“It’s good to know you had someone to keep you company while I was all alone,” Athena teased, not able to pull off the forlorn love look because she was smiling too much.

“Woman,” Cullen growled, causing all three ladies to laugh.

“Did you enjoy your letters?” Leliana apparently wasn’t informed about the huge grin Duchess would get when a stack came in either.

“Very much so, thank you,” Athena smiled and a light blush stained her cheeks.

“What letters?” Cullen had become very suspicious. He didn’t think he was going to like where this was going.

“You didn’t know?” Athena was surprised and Leliana hid her smirk.

“Know what?” Cullen almost growled as he looked at Leliana. She smiled serenely at him.

“We had been in the Basin about a week and I started receiving stacks of letters from you,” Athena looked up at him, “I thought you had given them to Leliana to send…”

“Leliana…” Cullen growled.

“You shouldn’t have left your desk unlocked,” she smirked.

“Now I understand why Varric and Dorian were saying how grateful they were to you,” Athena turned her gaze to Nightingale.

“Why would they be grateful?” Ruffles asked.

Athena blushed slightly, “I wasn’t exactly in the best of moods…”

“Why?” Cullen was immediately worried and then warned, “Leliana I will get you back for this.”

“It didn’t take long to get used to being here, and being with you every day instead of having the stolen moments from the war,” Athena almost whispered, looking up at him, and then she smirked, “I wasn’t as bad as Cassandra.”

“I’m not following…” Ruffles trailed off, confused.

“At my worst I was mopey and would cry at the drop of a hat. But Dorian and Varric were always able to draw me out of it… At least a little,” Athena blushed, “Cassandra would growl her answers and was more aggressive than usual. She did eventually come around but…”

“Was something wrong with Cassandra?” Leliana was concerned for our new Divine.

“I think she really missed Rylen. She seemed a little upset over my receiving letters.”

“During the war, I received reports that he was constantly writing someone.” Cullen said.

“Oh?” Leliana was excited about this bit of news. “I’m going to have to find these letters.”

“Is there anything else? Because I would really like to get a bath,” Athena sighed, feeling icky. (Yes, that is exactly how Duchess described it to me.)

“You don’t look like you need one,” Cullen was quite confused.

“Morrigan used magic to make me presentable,” Athena chuckled as Cullen shook his head.

“Everything else can wait until morning,” Leliana smiled at Duchess.

“I’ll have the servants send up water,” Ruffles informed her.

“Warm water?” Athena asked, hopefully.

“What other kind of water would it be?” Josephine was confounded by her strange request.

Leliana chuckled, “You didn’t bathe while you were camping with Bull?”

“Where would I have done that?” She asked, incredulous, as Athena tried her best not to laugh.

“In a river, a lake, the nearest body of water…” Leliana explained.

“But there are things that live in the water!” Ruffles exclaimed, “and it’s cold!”

Athena lost it then, laughing, “Oh, Josie, if you only knew.”

“Know what?” 

“The Basin had very beautiful rivers and waterfalls. They were cold but the water was so clear. To get to them and while we were in them, we had to fight giant poisonous spiders, among other things…” Athena was still chuckling.

“There are some parts of your trip that I really don’t need to know about,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena kissed him, “Sorry, love.”

Josephine blushed, “You will have hot water for your bath.”

“Thank you,” Athena hugged her and took Cullen’s hand as they left.

Once they were in Athena’s quarters Cullen pulled her close and kissed her, “Are you sure you don’t want to wait on that bath?”

Athena chuckled, “positive,” she kissed him, “but you can join me.”

“I will be taking you up on that,” Cullen smiled. 

“There was a knock at the door, “Inquisitor, we have your tub and the water for a bath.”

“Bring it in,” Cullen was loud enough to be heard down the stairs and through the door.

“One of us could have answered the door,” she chided.

“I don’t want to let you go right now,” Cullen kissed her again.

As the tub was filled with steaming water, three servants came in with armfuls of towels. Athena watching it all very bemused, and had to ask, “What are all the towels for?”

“The Ambassador thought they might be necessary,” one of the servants said, blushing. 

Athena chuckled, “Thank you.”

“Why…?” Cullen was bewildered.

She waited until the servants left and she undressed while answering him, “Look at how full the tub is and you said you'd join me?”

“Should we lay down the towels before or after?” Cullen asked as he watched her step in and sink in to the tub.

“Some before, and some after?” Athena closed her eyes and sighed contentedly, “Frankly, I don’t care.”

Cullen chuckled as he undressed and threw a towel on each side of the tub, “Missed bathing that much?”

“Yes,” Athena sank further in to the tub.

“Maybe I should go find a book to read,” Cullen teased, standing by the tub.

Athena’s eyes flew open, “Don’t you dare!” Cullen chuckled softly as he got in to the tub and reached for her. In response she splashed him, “Not until I’m clean.”

He splashed her back, “What are you waiting for?” 

“I can’t remember where I put the soap…” Athena blushed.

Cullen shook his head and reached over the side of the tub, producing a basket of stuff, “Did you get distracted by the excess of towels?”

“I was actually thinking that we may need more than what they brought,” she said with a low and sultry tone of voice. Cullen picked out a bar of soap for her and let the basket drop. Athena laughed, “I may have needed something else.”

“It will wait,” Cullen growled, grabbing for her again. The soap got lost in the water and Curly most certainly did not put down enough towels to soak up all the water that sloshed over.

Most of the water was sloshed out of the tub and they got out to clean up the mess they made. Athena chuckled, “It’s a good thing the floor is stone.” 

Cullen chuckled as he wrung out sopping wet towels in the tub, “Josephine would not be happy to have water dumped on her.”

Athena laughed, “No, she wouldn’t.”

When all the towels were wrung out and hanging off of the walkway above Athena’s bed, Cullen grabbed hold of her and kissed her, “No more month long trips.”

“From your lips to Leliana’s ears,” Athena smiled at him.

“I don’t think she’ll listen,” Cullen said softly as he pushed Athena’s heavy brown hair back from her face.

“She won’t… But then I’ll have to drag her along,” She gazed into his warm brown eyes.

“Did you really read all of those letters?” Cullen felt like he should be embarrassed, but knowing that it made his love happy, somehow made the trespass all right.

“Several times,” Athena said softly, “Had I known…”

“It’ all right,” Cullen paused and sighed, “I had planned to give them to you eventually.”

“Now who’s lying?” She teased gently, smiling at him.

“I am not!” Curly blushed, “I just hadn’t decided when.”

Athena chuckled, “I love you, Cullen.”

“I love you, too,” Cullen crushed her to him and sighed, “I’m sure you want to see your father.”

“I do, but I also want to be with you.”

“I’m not letting you out of my sight this night… And maybe tomorrow as well.”

“Does that mean I get to use your desk when you and Dorian play chess tomorrow?” Athena asked hopefully as they left the walkway and walked down the stairs to the main hall.

“That desk is hardly comfortable,” Cullen grumbled, wondering why she would not want to be somewhere else.

Athena paused to kiss him, “It’s comfortable enough.”

“What are you going to use it for?”

“You didn’t notice the stack of letters on my desk?” 

“My attention was on you, not your desk,” Cullen smiled, the memory of their lovemaking in the tub still fresh in his mind. Athena chuckled as he opened the door.

I was the first one to notice our heroic couple, “It’s a good thing I didn’t lay odds on not seeing them.”

“Why?” Sparkler asked.

“For once I owe you money,” I nodded toward Duchess and Curly.

“Dorian’s smiling,” Cullen said so only Athena could hear.

“He just won a bet about us,” Athena explained.

“Do I want to know?” Cullen asked.

Athena chuckled, “I’m not sure I want to know.”

“It wasn’t anything that bad, Duchess. I just didn’t think we’d see you tonight… Or for the next week,” I griped.

“Wow, a tame bet… Are you feeling all right?” Duchess teased as she sat down beside me with Curly on the other side of her.

“Dorian still owes us for the last one,” I reminded her.

Cullen looked at me, “The last one?”

“The last one was if we would get out of the Basin before our wedding. Dorian lost,” Athena smirked. “The worst one was when Varric laid three to one odds that I wouldn’t be able to beat Corypheus and Dorian bet against me.” 

“You bet that Athena would lose?!” Cullen burst out, incredulous and quickly becoming angry.

“What are you doing to me, Cousin?” Sparkler asked, alarmed. Athena just smiled serenely at him.

I chuckled, “You’re in for it.”

“In my defense she was going up against an immortal dark spawn magister from the dawn of time who had an archdemony-like dragon. Plus, the odds would have been much worse had I not took the bet,” Dorian explained.

“You and I are not playing chess tomorrow,” Cullen said softly to hide the menace in his voice.

“Why not?” Athena asked.

“I want to see how your cousin handles himself in a sparring match,” Cullen challenged. Athena laughed.

“You planned this didn’t you?” Sparkler grumbled.

“No, I didn’t plan it. Stop betting against me and maybe you wouldn’t find yourself in so much trouble or debt,” Athena warned.

“You should listen to her,” I said, chuckling, “Duchess, what was with Seeker this time around? She was grumpier than usual.”

“And I wasn’t?” Athena offered as a poor defense.

“She’s already married… You, I understand, and we could always get you to crack a smile at least,” I reminded her.

“Varric, you’re too smart for your own good. You’ll figure it out,” Athena said and changed the subject, “I thought my father would be here…”

“He said that there was something he wanted to give you. He should be back shortly,” Sparkler informed her. 

Cullen rested an arm on the back of Athena’s chair and she smiled at him. He leaned in for a kiss, and we applauded. Curly groaned, “The applause ends once we’re married.”

“We’ll see,” I smirked. 

The food came and we started eating. Seeker came in with her husband. She sat down beside Curly and paled looking at the food.

“You know Seeker, you ate less than Duchess did in the Basin. What’s going on?” I asked. Duchess stuck her tongue out at me, “I’m not saying that you ate less than you usually do, just that Cassandra ate less than that.”

“I’m fine, Varric,” Cassandra grumbled.

“You should go to a healer,” Rylen told her.

“I’m fine, it’s just the stress of being the new divine,” Seeker tried to explain it away.

“How long have you been getting ill?” Rylen asked.

Cassandra sat back in her chair after she pushed her food away, “The first night in the Basin.”

“How many battles did you get sick in?” Rylen was angry.

Cullen raised an eyebrow at Athena. She shook her head and mouthed, “Don’t.” Athena asked so everyone could hear, “is Caerwin still here?”

“She is,” Cullen answered.

“Cassandra, you should go see her,” Duchess suggested.

“But... she’s a Mage,” Cassandra tried to put it off.

“So am I,” Athena laughed.

“You’re also a healer, would you…” Cassandra started.

“Cassandra, you’re my friend. The questions I would have to ask and the things I would have to do would be embarrassing for both of us,” Athena paused, “Caerwin’s an excellent healer and she’s honest. The conversations with her stay private as well.”

Seeker let out a frustrated sigh and got up to leave, “Fine. I’ll go first thing in the morning.”

“Thank you,” Cullen said softly to Athena.

“For?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him, not sure that she did anything that deserved his thanks.

“For not being as stubborn as our Divine,” Cullen answered.

“You’re welcome,” Athena kissed him.

“These battles that Cassandra got ill in. What did you do?” Cullen worried that Cassandra getting ill had put Athena and the rest of us in jeopardy.

“It was only three, and the only thing I could do was cast barrier on her,” Athena responded.

“You also fought back to back with her,” Sparkler interjected.

“And how is that different from me fighting back to back with you, Morrigan, or Varric?” Athena argued, raising an eyebrow.

“She couldn’t defend herself,” Sparkler snapped, finally releasing the worry he had for his cousin.

“All the more reason, I should think,” Athena smirked a warning at Dorian.

“Give it up, Sparkler, you’re not going to win this one. There were times she had to defend you because you couldn't defend yourself,” I quipped, not letting Sparkler out of this gracefully.

“She’s also had to defend you, dwarf,” Dorian shot back.

“We’ve all had to defend each other for a great many reasons,” Athena tried to calm our shortened tempers.

“You never got too drunk to fight,” I argued.

“You also never got sick in battle,” Dorian responded as well.

“No, just frozen in fear,” Athena mumbled and sighed, “hopefully we can go a week without having to battle demons, spiders, and cult people?”

“What do you have against spiders?” Darius asked as he sat beside Dorian.

“I take offense to having poison shot at me,” Athena griped. Arthur and Darius laughed.

“There you are!” Sparkler exclaimed seeing his uncle.

Arthur chuckled, sitting in between me and Sparkler, “I apologize for being late. I had to do some digging.”

“Digging?” Athena was confused.

"While I was at Ostwick, I found a couple things that had belonged to your mother. She would have wanted you to have them,” Arthur handed over a small box and a medium sized box, “She wore them when we got married.”

Athena fingered the boxes like she wasn’t sure that she wanted to open them. She then took a deep breath, opened the larger box first, and pulled out a very elegant veil that had crystals sewn into it. Gasping in surprise she whispered, “It’s beautiful.” 

As she opened the next box, tears sprang to her eyes. “When she would wear this, I would ask her if I could try it on. She eventually stopped wearing it… I would ask after it, but she would always tell me that it broke.” Athena held up an emerald bracelet.

“It’s beautiful,” Cullen quietly commented.

“Thank you for these. They’re beautiful.”

“I found more of your mother’s journals. The Commander has them,” Arthur smiled at her.

Athena glanced at Cullen, confused. He pulled her close, “If you’re done eating we can go talk about it…”

“Family meeting… I love those,” Sparkler said sarcastically.

“Who said you were invited?” Curly grumped, still irritated with Dorian from earlier.

“Cullen…” Athena entreated, she did not want to play peacekeeper between her lover and cousin.

Cullen sighed, giving in for the moment, “In your quarters or my office?”

“My quarters, they’re closer,” Athena answered. When she stood Cullen, Dorian, and Arthur stood as well. Athena looked at Darius, “Aren’t you coming Darius?”

“I’m not exactly family, my dear,” Darius responded.

“You’re courting my cousin. You’ve known Cullen for several years and you’ve been there for me. I consider you family,” Athena finished quietly.

Darius couldn’t speak for several moments because of the sizable lump in his throat. He was finally able to croak out as he stood, “Thank you, my lady.”

“Shall we?” Cullen asked. In response Athena smiled up at him and they went to her quarters to talk about all that transpired while we were away, and then some…

“Now will you answer my questions, Uncle?” Dorian confronted Arthur as soon as they were seated.

“Shouldn’t Athena have her questions answered first?” Arthur inquired.

“He’s not going to stop pacing until you answer him. I don’t mind waiting,” Athena offered.

“The voice of pragmatism speaks,” Sparkler smiled at her.

“You were up before sunrise every morning pacing while we were in the Basin…” Athena sat close to Cullen and they held hands.

“How would you know?” Dorian was shocked by her revelation.

“Has it really been that long?” Athena chuckled.

“There will come a time when you will not be up with the sun. Especially when you’re up all night reading,” Dorian griped, blushing.

“Good to know I wasn’t the only one not sleeping,” Athena quipped. Cullen looked at her with a raised eyebrow, “I did try, the letters helped me get a little sleep.” 

Cullen just shook his head at her and said quietly, “We’ll talk later.”

“The last I heard from you, you were going to be returning to Skyhold, what changed?” Dorian asked Arthur after a heavy silence filled the room.

“I had read something about phylacteries and what they could be used for that terrified me,” Arthur was being cryptic.

“I’m not following,” Dorian had a shaky hold on his frustration.

“While at Ostwick I found more of Lydia’s journals. She had written of a Templar who had boasted that he used a mage’s phylactery to harm them….” Arthur offered more of an explanation.

Dorian took a sharp breath, understanding, “You thought someone had found Athena’s phylactery and was using it against her.” Arthur nodded in answer, looking at Athena. Dorian didn’t notice and continued with his questions, “Why did you stop writing?”

“I didn’t stop writing,” Arthur turned his attention to Sparkler.

“That’s a mystery that is yet to be solved,” Cullen joined the fray.

“Did you find Athena’s phylactery?” Dorian was now worried.

“No, but I know where it should be,” Arthur answered. Athena kept her eyes trained on her and Cullen’s entwined hands. Arthur noticed, and asked quietly, “Did Lydia tell you?”

“Sort of…” Athena paused, “she would tell me that if I ever felt threatened I was supposed to go to the circle tower in Fereldan. I would find a piece of myself and protection,” Athena stopped and looked at Cullen, “That was before the fifth blight though… I thought she was talking about the Templars that had visited Ostwick from the circle tower.”

“Is that why you wanted to go to the Fereldan circle so badly?” Arthur remembered his daughter begging to be moved.

Athena smiled, “No, I had a crush on one of the Templars that had visited Ostwick from Fereldan.”

“And what happened to this Templar?” Arthur wondered why this was his first time hearing of this.

"I'm marrying him soon," Athena smiled up at Curly.

“I remember sending the approval for the visiting Templars, but I am uncertain of how you would have come into contact with them.” Arthur was still processing what Athena said.

“I had my nose in a book instead of watching where I was going, and I fell down some stairs. I was helped up by a very kind Templar who was visiting.”

“And that Templar was Cullen? How would you have figured that out?” Arthur was still confused.

“Athena and I were talking and she mentioned one of the trainees that was sent with me…” Cullen caressed Duchess’ back. He was anxious to have this conversation done and talk to Athena privately.

"And you see mages with violet eyes by the dozen,” Sparkler teased.

“The stairwell was dark,” Athena started.

“And I had my helmet on,” Cullen finished.

“Excuses, excuses,” Sparkler smirked.

"Dorian, leave them be," Darius interjected, still amazed that Duchess considered him family.

“About this phylactery…” Athena trailed off as she looked around the room.

“At the very least it should be in your possession, Athena,” Darius said.

"You're certain it’s at the Circle tower?” Athena asked, her eyes back on Cullen.

"As certain as I can be,” Arthur quietly spoke.

Athena sighed, worried that this meant another trip. She was also scared that Cullen would be going with her, and she didn’t want him to suffer, “Cullen?” 

"Darius is right, and there are precious few people I would trust with it," Cullen had stopped rubbing her back, which was being held far too stiffly, and caressed her cheek.

"I'm just glad he waited until you came back," Darius mumbled.

“You were going to go back there by yourself?” Arthur asked Curly.

“Why does it matter if the Commander went back to his former circle?” Dorian questioned.

“When you marry the beautiful, intelligent, and kind lady that’s sitting beside you, Dorian’s going to be your cousin too,” Darius said, in an attempt to get Cullen to open up.

"How do you know what happened?" Cullen looked at Darius with eyes filled with old pain.

“You were the only one that survived, Cullen. I may not know everything that happened, but it’s happened before on a lesser scale hasn’t it?” Darius was gentle. He knew his Commander had suffered a great deal.

Cullen slowly nodded and looked at Athena. She didn’t look away and in those violet eyes all he saw was love and support. She said, barely above a whisper, “I love you.”

Cullen launched in to his tale, anchoring his eyes to Athena’s, “When the fifth blight happened, the circle tower fell and some of the mages there turned against us and became abominations, demons, and anything else they could think of. I watched the other Templars be slaughtered and tortured... I was tortured to the point of where I nearly lost my mind.”

“And you wanted to go back without having Athena there with you?” Darius knew it had been bad, but not that bad. Dorian sat down and swore.

“She has faced her fears for me, for all of us, on an almost daily basis…” Cullen spoke quietly as he watched Athena’s violet eyes fill with tears.

"I would never ask this of you," Athena whispered as her tears spilled over.

Cullen smiled a little and wiped her tears away, “You aren’t asking. I’m offering. Your phylactery can be used to track you… Or worse…”

Athena searched his eyes for any hint of a way to dissuade him from this, she didn’t see any, but she had to try anyway, “The circle tower isn’t that far away. I could be back in a couple weeks at the most.”

“I know how to get in and out of there quickly. I also know where they hold the phylacteries. This needs to be done as soon as possible,” he said softly.

Athena sighed and closed her eyes, “The one trip I don’t want you to come with me on… We’ll leave at first light.”

Cullen chuckled, "I think you can have a day or two.”

“Are you and my father going to be able to sleep until my phylactery is found?” Athena already knew the answer. Arthur chuckled and Cullen blushed in response. Athena half smiled, “I’ll take that as a no. We leave at first light. Who else knows?”

“Athena, you have to at least give me a day to find someone to watch over the soldiers while we're gone. Leliana and Josephine know that Arthur was searching for it at the Fereldan circle…” Cullen answered.

“Darius?” Athena tried to help Cullen.

“The Commander asked me to go with him when you weren’t here, my answer remains the same,” Darius smiled gently at her.

“And that answer would be?”

“He agreed to come with me,” Cullen said quietly.

“Why would you agree to such a thing?!” Dorian was pacing again, angry at his lover.

“Would you have rather had him go by himself?” Darius was indignant.

“I would have preferred him being tied to a chair until we got back,” Sparkler grumbled.

“As much fun as that sounds… No,” Darius stated.

Arthur came over to sit beside Athena and Cullen as Darius and Dorian continued to argue about who should have been tied to a chair when. He asked, “Darius is Dorian’s love?”

“They’ve been officially courting since before we left South Reach,” Athena looked out the windows with unseeing eyes.

“He seems like a good man. I am sorry for not telling you my plans, but if it was safe, I didn’t want anyone knowing where to look for it,” Arthur explained.

“It doesn’t matter, for whatever reason we weren’t receiving the letters you were sending. I’m just happy that you’re all right,” Athena pulled herself out of where ever she had gone and smiled at her father.

“Thank you. I would be happy to go with you when you do leave,” Arthur offered.

“I would like that,” Athena answered.

“I’m going to turn in for the night,” Arthur hugged Athena, shook hands with Cullen, and left. 

Cullen and Athena looked at each other while Sparkler and Darius continued to argue. Athena finally had enough, “Why don’t you two go tie each other up?”

Dorian looked around, “Arthur left?”

“Several minutes ago. He didn’t want to interrupt your lover’s spat,” Cullen didn’t hide his irritation.

“Then we should be on our way. Good night Athena and Commander,” Darius pulled Dorian along with him.

“Don’t I get a chance to say goodnight?” Sparkler grumbled.

“No,” was heard before the door closed.

Athena and Cullen chuckled softly, and then a heavy silence fell as they got lost deep in thought. Athena finally broke it with, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

"Am I sure that I want to protect you? Yes. Am I sure that I will go to any means to do it? Yes," Cullen replied with certainty.

“Cullen-” She was interrupted.

“You’ve had to face your past time and time again. It’s time that I face mine,” Cullen took both of her hands in his.

“And you don’t face that past on an almost nightly basis? I was never tortured and I don’t think I would ever willingly go back to Ostwick,” Athena said quietly.

Cullen half smiled, “I have no control over my dreams. Going there, I have control over that. Besides, I’ll have you with me.”

“I’m scared for you,” Athena felt she had to be blunt.

“It’s something that needs to be done. I’ll be fine,” Cullen hoped he sounded more assured than he was feeling.

"I told you once before that I refuse to lose you to your memories. This is your warning that I will use magic on you if things get too intense.” Athena searched his eyes, looking for something, she wasn’t sure what.

“Athena, I will be fine.” 

“I wish I could believe that,” she said softly.

“Why can’t you?” He wondered what she was thinking.

“Because you’re worried,” She answered simply, plainly, with her heart laid bare.

“That’s nothing new. I always worry about you,” Cullen tried to hide his worry for himself.

“This is different, and I don’t think what I see in your eyes has anything to do with the phylactery.”

“Your phylactery,” Cullen corrected.

“How can something belong to me when I don’t remember it ever being done? And you’re not changing the subject. Talk to me,” Athena pleaded.

“How do you not remember it being done?” Cullen asked, she shrugged in answer. “The reason it belongs to you is because it’s your blood. That little vial of blood has been enchanted to be used to track you and possibly harm you. I won’t allow it. The circle tower isn’t dangerous anymore, the only danger I’m in is if I trip going down the stairs.”

“Cullen,” Athena was getting frustrated, “it’s not the physical danger that worries me.”

“I understand that, Athena. But I have a life with you to look forward to, and I would do anything to protect that. Even if it means facing my past while I’m awake. I believe that our love will get me through this,” he said quietly.

“I love you,” Athena whispered with tears in her eyes.

Cullen kissed her slowly, gently, and then whispered, "I love you, too." They made their way to bed and made love in an unhurried and gentle fashion and they fell asleep holding each other. 

**

Athena was woken in the middle of the night by Cullen crying out for help. Like always, she was the balm to his raw nightmares and was able to talk him out of them, so at least one of them could finish the night in sleep. Once he was calm, Athena got out of bed and grabbed a book to read. She read until almost dawn, occasionally talking Cullen out of his dreams. When he woke she smiled down at him and whispered, “Morning.”

“Morning…” Cullen moved so he was half sitting, “did you sleep at all?”

“More than I did while I was in the Basin,” She chuckled softly as he shook his head at her.

“It wasn’t-” He started, afraid that his nightmares had disturbed her sleep.

“I couldn’t go back to sleep after the first dream you had,” Athena interrupted him quietly.

“Why not?”

“Because I was wide awake?” She shrugged a shoulder and let it fall.

“It wasn’t because of what we talked about last night?”

"If it was, I wouldn't have been reading Varric's latest novel,” Duchess smiled at him.

Cullen kissed her and there was a knock at the door. He groaned, getting Athena to chuckle huskily. She called out, “Just a minute.” Athena got out of bed, put on a robe, and went down to answer the door. She was greeted by Leliana and Josephine.

“Morning,” Ruffles smiled at her.

“When did you become an early riser?” Athena asked her.

“When our divine is yelling in the courtyard, I tend to be notified,” Josephine smiled brightly.

Athena growled, “I’ll get dressed.”

“You were away from Cullen for a month, how is it that he taught you to speak bear already?” Leliana teased, following Duchess up the stairs.

“You’ve never travelled with Cassandra have you?” Athena looked at Cullen who had just finished getting his pants on.

“I’ve never had the pleasure,” Leliana said.

“Do you remember how I would always tell Varric to leave her alone and that she wasn’t that bad?” Athena took off her robe and put on clothes suitable to wear under armor.

“Your not putting on a dress?” Ruffles asked, surprised.

"Yes, I remember," Leliana gave Josephine a side long glance.

“Well, if I learned to speak bear from anyone it was her. In one of my more frustrated moments in the Basin I told Varric that he should change Cassandra’s nickname to dragon. And no, Josie, I’m hoping to leave Skyhold by dinner,” Athena cocked an eyebrow at Cullen, who had finished dressing.

“Tomorrow morning,” Cullen’s answer caused Athena to sigh in frustration.

“You just got back and your anxious to go again?” Leliana was surprised by this.

"I don't have a choice on this one,” Athena replied.

“Where are you going? Your wedding is fast approaching,” Josephine was close to panicking.

“Hopefully we will be back within a fortnight,” Duchess hoped to avoid answering Ruffles’ question. 

“Does this have anything to do with your phylactery?” Leliana noticed Athena’s evasion and became suspicious.

“Everything,” Athena sighed again, “my father says it’s at the Fereldan circle.”

“And the Commander?” Leliana turned on her heel to look at Curly.

Athena raised an eyebrow in answer, “I think I’d rather deal with Cassandra than be part of this conversation,” She turned to kiss Cullen farewell, hooked arms with Ruffles, and walked out.

Leliana waited for Cullen to answer her. As they walked out, “Yes, I’m going.”

“I take it Athena isn’t happy about it?”

“No, she’s not,” Cullen answered as they walked through the main hall.

“She knows you love her and would do anything to protect her. Do you really think this is wise?” 

“I’m the only one here that knows the circle. As soon as we have what belongs to Athena, we’ll be on our way back,” Cullen assured her as they came into the courtyard to see Cassandra pacing with Ruffles beside her and Athena no where to be found.

“Josie?” Leliana inquired, looking for an explanation.

“Athena went to talk to the surgeon,” Josephine answered.

“Why?” Cullen drew out the word.

“Because the surgeon wanted me to see her instead of Caerwin,” Cassandra growled.

“Where’s Rylen?” Leliana showed an outward calm, far from what she was feeling inside.

“With the Inquisitor,” Josephine started to wring her hands.

“What happened?” Cullen demanded.  
“When we came out of the keep, we saw Cassandra and Rylen arguing with the surgeon. One of the children bumped into the surgeon and she raised a hand as if she was going to strike the child. Athena stopped her. When the child was safe, Athena released her and then the surgeon shoved her and ran. Athena and Rylen chased after her,” Josephine explained, but Cullen started running as soon as he heard that Athena was pushed.

Cullen followed the sound of shouting voices and stood behind Athena, she noticed and looked up at him. He smiled at her as Rylen shouted at the surgeon, “How dare you shove the Inquisitor and raise your hand against a child?!”

“It is my understanding that the new surgeon arrived yesterday. Why are you still here?” Cullen’s fury was barely restrained.

The soon to be former surgeon paled, “I have no where else to go.”

“You have one hour to gather your things and leave, or you will be placed in the dungeon,” Athena ordered... She’s always the gracious one.

“I refuse,” the surgeon said mulishly.

“Then you can go to the dungeon now,” Cullen growled and motioned for two soldiers to come take the former surgeon to her new living space. The surgeon ran past the soldiers and through the gate. “Should we go after her?”

“Why? We wanted her to leave. Someone should go through her things though,” Athena said as Rylen left to go back to Seeker. The soldiers left to do the Inquisitor’s will. 

“You're not upset about her pushing you?" Cullen knew Athena was tough, but he wanted to be certain she wasn't harmed.

"No," Athena laughed, "A bug bite would bother me more."

"Then I think we should have breakfast,” Cullen said as Athena turned to face him. He pulled her against him and kissed her.

Athena chuckled, “I was hoping to talk to the new surgeon.”

“After breakfast,” Cullen took hold of her hand and they walked in to the keep.


	40. Chapter 40

They stood on the docks looking out over the mist shrouded Lake Calenhad. The sun had gone down an hour ago. Dorian asked, to relieve the tense silence, “Wouldn’t it be wise to wait until morning?”

Athena nodded her head, latching on to her cousin’s suggestion, “I agree with Dorian. We need to be able to see to get there, this fog is only getting worse.”

“Changing your mind, Inquisitor?” Darius heard the anxious note in Duchess’ voice.

“Some how I don’t think my father or the Commander are going to let me,” Athena sighed in frustration. She would have been quite happy to leave the infernal thing and place to rot.

“You don’t have to do this,” Cullen sounded quite irritated.

“Neither do you. I’m not worried about me,” her voice was barely above a whisper.

“I think we’ll all feel better once this is over with,” Arthur tried to keep an argument from happening right on the docks. Athena and Darius looked at each other, very worried for Curly.

The ferryman came over, “Last boat out for the night. The fog’s getting thick.”

“Well, Inquisitor?” Dorian watched Athena shudder and then look at Cullen who nodded.

Athena gave a ragged sigh wondering if Cullen’s nightmares were going to get worse. He hadn’t really slept since they left Skyhold, “Let’s go.”

Our foursome boarded the boat. Athena sat beside Cullen and took hold of his hand. He was surprised and looked at her (they had been arguing for days over this.) Athena whispered, “Just because I don’t like that you’re doing this, doesn’t mean that I stopped loving you.”

Cullen kissed her, “I love you, too.”

“They’re making up…” Dorian sighed in relief, “thank the Maker.”

The fog was so thick that Sparkler couldn’t see Athena blush or shake her head at him, but Cullen could and he chuckled softly. It took two hours to get to Kinloch Hold, (that’s where the Fereldan circle is housed.) The tower rose out of the mist like a forsaken lover. It was still beautiful in its way, but it was hard to see past the terror that had happened inside. 

As soon as the spire of the tower could be seen, Cullen stared at it with unseeing eyes, where images of those long dead flashed before him. Athena noticed and whispered, “Come back to me, my love.”

Cullen shook himself loose from the memories and smiled down at her. Arthur watched it all quietly, thinking that they should have waited the night. 

Athena asked Cullen to keep him in the present, “Why are you avoiding Josie?”

“I am not avoiding her!” 

“She sees it a bit differently.”

“Just because I don’t have time to meet with her morning, noon, and night does not mean I’m avoiding her. I had a pet bear added to my list of duties recently,” Cullen teased.

Athena chuckled, “Has she really been that bad?”

“The bear? No. Josephine? Yes,” Cullen complained.

“Commander, if you would just go for the fittings, I don’t think the Ambassador would be as insistent,” Darius chuckled.

The smile left Cullen’s face and he exploded, “There is no need for daily fittings!”

Athena laughed, "The planning part will be over soon.”

“Are you two going anywhere after you’re married?” Arthur found the coming nuptials of his daughter to be quite the pleasant topic.

Cullen and Athena looked at each other. Cullen responded, “We haven’t really talked about it.”

“Somewhere that no one can find us for a week,” Athena’s voice was full of hope, causing Cullen to chuckle.

“I think that can be arranged,” Cullen kissed her. 

The lighthearted conversation came to an abrupt halt when the boat docked at the circle tower. They stood on the dock looking up at the tower. Athena squeezed Cullen’s hand and they walked to the door. Dorian knocked once, when there wasn’t an answer they went inside. Sparkler sent up a magical flare so they could see. 

Arthur grabbed a torch from the nearest wall and lit it. He asked, “Where to?”

Cullen looked around him, getting his bearings. He could feel the place and the memories clawing at the back of his mind, "Rooms should be this way.” 

He started walking down a hallway on the right. Athena visibly shivered before she caught up with Cullen, taking his hand. Arthur looked at Sparkler noticing Duchess’ shiver. Dorian shrugged, at a loss.

As they went along they lit the wall torches. They finally came to a cluster of rooms. As they went in to the first one Arthur asked, “Athena, are you afraid to be here?”

"Terrified," she answered softly.

“Why?” Dorian was surprised to hear that she was afraid.

“It has the feel of a graveyard to me,” Athena whispered.

“Why does that matter?” Darius was confused.

Duchess blushed, “I’m afraid of graveyards.”

“The Emerald Graves! That’s why you were so jumpy and kept tripping! I was starting to think we would have to carry you!” Dorian exclaimed.

“Everyone has something they’re terrified of,” Arthur reassured his now profusely blushing daughter.

“Most irrational fears don’t end with broken bones,” Dorian griped.

“Dorian!” Athena exclaimed.

Arthur chuckled, “We should get some rest. We’ll get started first thing in the morning?”

“The sooner we’re out of here, the better,” Athena looked at Cullen, who had meandered to the other side of the room. They said their good nights and left our lovers alone.

Cullen hadn’t been listening to the conversation at all, remembering the first time he came here at thirteen, and how amazed he was. With a great deal of sadness, he thought, if only this place held the same luster as it did then. 

Athena broke him out of his reverie, “Cullen?”

Cullen looked around, “Where did everyone go?” 

“To their rooms,” she answered quietly, “Where were you?”

“I was remembering the first time I came here and how amazing this place seemed,” Cullen answered. Athena sighed a little in relief, causing him to chuckle softly, “I have good memories here too.”

As she undressed, she asked huskily, “Would you like to make another good memory?”

Cullen smiled and kissed her. They made love before they attempted sleep. Cullen’s dreams were worse than Athena had ever seen them, talking him out of them only worked once, so she decided to kiss him out of them. During one such kiss he woke, and tightened his grip on her, he said softly, “This is a pleasant way to wake up.”

“It’s the middle of the night, Cullen,” Athena’s voice was heavy with sleep.

“I’m sorry,” he caressed her cheek.

"There’s no reason for you to apologize,” she kissed him, again, “I love you.” 

They made love and Athena drifted off to sleep… Leaving Cullen alone with his thoughts. He wondered what Athena would say if he said he wanted to go to where he had been tortured. It would probably start another argument, but he couldn’t help thinking that it had changed somehow, and he was curious to see it. Cullen stayed up the rest of the night lost in thought and absent mindedly caressed Athena’s shoulder.

**

Like magic, Athena woke as the sun broke over the horizon. Lifting her head slightly, she looked up at Cullen, “You didn’t go back to sleep?”

Curly shook his head in answer.

“Shall we get what we came for and get out of here?” Athena sat up, anxious to be away from a place that held such horrible memories for the man she loved.

“Not interested in a tour?” Cullen half heartedly teased.

“No,” She answered simply and with certainty.

“Athena, I understand that you’re worried, but I have good memories here,” Cullen reminded her.

“You really weren’t listening last night?” Athena asked as she got dressed. Cullen shook his head in answer, doing the same.  
Athena blushed, "I had to admit to my fear of graveyards last night."

“Why?” 

"Because that's what this place feels like to me," Athena looked around her pensively.

"In a way, it is,” he agreed. It used to be filled with people, now it was completely empty except for the little band of adventurers currently utilizing it.

“Can we get out of here?” Athena practically begged.

“As soon as we get your phylactery,” Cullen promised.

“Then let’s get to finding it,” Athena said as they left their room.

Cullen led the way to the basement where the phylacteries were being housed behind a door that was locked and enchanted. Dorian broke the enchantment and Darius had somehow found keys, which led to Cullen shaking his head and chuckling softly. Arthur lit the torches around the room. 

Athena gasped at seeing how many were there, “They were put in here and forgotten.”

“How do we find Athena’s phylactery in all this?” Dorian asked.

“The easiest way would be for her to walk up and down the aisles. The closer she gets to it, the phylactery will glow,” Darius answered. 

Athena sighed and started walking up and down the aisles, it took a while as it seemed there was a thousand phylacteries there. Athena grabbed it and went back to the door, only to see that Curly wasn’t waiting there. “Where’s Cullen?”

“He didn’t say anything about leaving,” Arthur answered. 

Athena passed her phylactery to Arthur and ran up the stairs and into their room, “Of course he wouldn’t be here.”

“He may have just went to the bathroom,” Dorian suggested as he followed her.

“Do you know where the garderobes are?” Athena asked.

“He may have went to the Templar quarters,” Darius offered.

“We’re going to have to split up,” Athena found herself wishing for a tracking device for former Templars.

“Why?” Dorian asked.

“Have you ever watched how a soldier reacts to being back on battlefields they fought on?” Darius questioned.

“Yes. They get lost in thought, reliving…” Dorian swore, “ the memories.”

“He relives them practically every night, and they’ve gotten worse since this trip started. Cullen hasn’t been sleeping…” Athena trailed off, close to panicking.

“If he goes too deep in to the memories, his body will start calling for lyrium again,” Darius finished.

“Does the pain of withdrawal ever stop?” Dorian had held such hope for this trip, in and out, and back to Skyhold.

“Eventually…. He didn’t do himself any favors by going back on it,” Darius replied.

“Athena, you and Darius should search the Templar quarters and harrowing chamber. Dorian and I will search down here,” Arthur ordered, he stopped Duchess before she ran out of the room to promise, “we’ll find him.”

“I know,” Athena ran out of the room with Darius beside her. They walked in to the Templar quarters and you could her a pin drop. Athena whispered, “It’s too quiet.”

“Don’t let it get it to you. Dorian may be right,” Darius encouraged.

“I hope Dorian is right,” Athena wasn’t holding out much hope. They went door to door, checking all the rooms with Curly not to be found.

“I guess we go upstairs then,” Darius said softly. As they opened the door to the final floor they saw Cullen standing in the middle of the room with his back to them, staring at a spot that was beside the stairs.

“Cullen?” Athena softly walked up to him.

“It was here,” Cullen rasped out.

“What was here?” Athena was being so gentle that one would think that she was approaching an injured and wild animal (in a way, she was. Duchess later told me that even though Cullen was talking to her, his eyes had the far away look of of not being present, locked in a past that only he could see.) Darius motioned that he was going to let the others know that Curly had been found. Athena nodded.

"Where I was tortured…They had me caged and they…” He paused and swallowed past a lump that felt like it was choking him, “Because of my feelings for Selene… They would use her image and say or do what I wanted her to say or do and then have her reject me… Among other things.”

“Cullen, you don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to,” Athena gently touched his arm.

Cullen jumped, Duchess’ gentle touch bringing him back to the present. He covered her hand with his and half smiled, “I thought that they may have changed it after what happened during the blight, but they didn’t...” He looked down at her, “You’re right, this place is like a graveyard.”

Athena smiled, “Are you ready?”

“You found your phylactery already? Where is it?” 

“I looked for it for hours, and then spent another hour searching for you. My father has it.”

“I’m sorry. I had to use the garerobe and then…” Cullen trailed off, blushing. He was embarrassed that he had lost track of time so easily.

“And?” Athena prompted, smiling because he was blushing.

“And I got curious. It wasn’t one of my better ideas to come up here,” Curly admitted as they started walking.

“Are you in pain?” Athena stopped so she could help him if his answer was yes.

“A little, but it’s nothing I can’t handle,” Cullen stopped with her.

“Do you want me to…?” She trailed off.

“Not here. If I’m still in pain once we’re on shore, definitely,” He kissed her, needing to be reminded of a peaceful future instead of a tortured past.

“I love you,” Duchess whispered after the kiss ended.

“I love you, too,” Cullen smiled down at her, “let’s get out of here.” 

“Gladly,” Athena smiled back and they went to meet the rest of their party.

“I see our Commander is not the worse for wear,” Sparkler cocked an eyebrow.

"I lost track of time," Curly blushed. (He’s lucky I wasn’t there, I would’ve teased him mercilessly.)

“Can we go home now? I would really like to stop panicking Josephine,” Athena grinned.

“The Frostback Basin was Leliana’s idea,” Cullen griped.

“I think she just wants Athena to fight as many dragons as she can… Or would be gods,” Dorian remarked as they walked out of the tower.

“You left out the part about the dragon…” Curly looked down at her.

“Leliana said that she told you,” Athena responded.

“That you had to fight a beast that had the spirit of a god, but not that it was a dragon…” He grumped.

“You can yell at her when we get back to Skyhold, my love,” Athena smiled serenely at him, “I have the feeling Josie is not going to let me out of her sight until our wedding day.”

“That’s probably for the best,” Darius chuckled, “every time you leave your soon to be husband tries to run off.”

“I do not!” Curly blushed slightly.

"So long as he's not going after his admirers from Halamshiral, I have no concerns," Athena teased.

“Woman, you’ll pay for that,” Curly growled. The rest laughed.

After the laughter subsided, Dorian asked, “We took a ferry here… How do we get back?”

"The same way," Arthur pointed at the ferry.

“He stayed?” Darius was surprised.

“I asked him to,” Arthur answered quietly. 

They boarded the ferry and Cullen had one look back behind him. Athena whispered in his ear (something neither one will tell me.) Curly smiled and kissed her. Unfortunately, the boat ride didn’t stay as lighthearted as when they boarded. Cullen’s pain became worse and the memories came flooding back, again. Athena noticed that he was pale and whispered his name.  
He nodded his head once, and just like in Halamshiral she kissed him and ran her hands through his hair, taking his pain away.

“I still don’t understand how you can get your fingers through his hair,” Sparkler sardonically teased.

Athena winked at him, “Magic.”

“I could ask the same of Darius,” Cullen teased.

"My hair gets this way naturally," Sparkler blushed.

“You started styling your hair at ten, Dorian. I’m assuming it’s only gotten worse,” Arthur chimed in.

“You should be up with the sun for as long as it takes you to do your hair,” Athena found it necessary to join in the teasing.

“Says the one who broke her ankle in the Emerald Graves and refused to tell anyone about it. All because you have a fear of graveyards,” Dorian griped.

“I did not!”

“So it was another Mage with violet eyes that has the ability to close rifts hobbling around on one foot while we were there?” Dorian asked.

“I didn’t say that I didn’t hurt it, but it was not broken!”

“Varric thought otherwise,” Sparkler argued.

“Varric was wrong,” Athena stated.

"Why are you two arguing over something that happened over a year ago?” Darius thought they were acting like an old married couple.

“Because my cousin delights in getting me in to trouble,” Athena complained. Cullen unsuccessfully choked back a chuckle.

“Dorian, have you really become that bad of a chess player?” Arthur asked. 

Curly outright laughed, “I try to teach him, he doesn’t want to listen though.”

“I guess we’ll just have to show him how it’s done,” Arthur smiled at Curly causing Dorian to groan.

“I think I’m going to prefer Josie’s company for the next few months,” Athena mumbled.

“Can I join you?” Darius asked hopefully.

“No.” Cullen emphatically stated.

“I don’t recall him asking you,” Athena stuck her tongue out at him.

“The answer is still no,” Cullen was barely heard and he kissed her as the boat docked on the shore. 

After they were on dry land again, Duchess teased, “I don’t know… We may need Darius… I’ll have to talk to Josie.”

Cullen growled and Athena wrinkled her nose at him, smiling. Arthur chuckled, loving that his daughter was so happy. 

**

On the return trip to Skyhold they had to pass through Redcliffe and they met up with a young man named Connor. (When Connor was a boy he accidentally pulled a demon in to him from the Fade. The hero of Fereldan was able to save him and his family.) On this night Connor was being attacked, but he wasn’t defending himself. Cullen and Darius grabbed the attackers and held them to keep them from doing more harm, while Athena kneeled down beside Connor, “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine, my lady. I just...” Connor tried to stand and collapsed back to the ground holding his stomach and groaning in pain.

“Inquisitor?” Cullen’s grip tightened on the attacker he was holding.

“Connor’s bleeding internally,” She got ready to heal him.

“Leave me,” Connor groaned out, shying away from Duchess’ touch.

“If I leave you, you’ll die,” Athena said softly.

“For all the suffering I caused, I deserve death,” Connor choked out, fighting tears.

Athena closed her eyes, trying to hide her own tears. When she opened them her violet eyes shined with them, “You were a boy, Connor. We’ve all made mistakes. Don’t you think it’s time to forgive yourself?”

“Have you ever let a demon in? Have you ever hurt people?” He questioned, it almost sounded as though he was accusing her because she didn’t blame him.

“A demon? No. But I have hurt people… Too many people,” Athena softly replied.

“You were fighting to save Thedas,” Cullen whispered fiercely. He did not like that Athena was holding on to so much guilt.

“We all have our own wars to fight. Some are just more… public than others. I am sorry Connor, but I can’t watch you die,” Athena closed her eyes as tears rolled down her cheeks and healed him.

“Why?!” Connor cried out in agonized desperation.

“Because you can’t forgive or move on when you’re dead,” Arthur said quietly with tears shining in his dark eyes.

“Why don’t you come to Skyhold? You deserve a fresh start,” Athena offered to Connor.

“Thank you, Inquisitor, but I can’t,” Connor gingerly stood.

“What would you like us to do with these two?” Cullen referenced the attackers. He squeezed the arms of the one he was holding in place so hard that the guy winced.

“Connor?” Athena knew it wasn’t her decision to make.

“You’re leaving the decision to me?” Connor was shocked and somewhat in awe of Duchess.

“Why wouldn’t I? You were the one that was attacked.”

“I don’t know… I’ve never been asked to decide anything. What would you do?” Connor was thoughtful as he looked over his attackers. Completely out of his element, he knew he would agree to anything Athena said.

“I would either turn them over to the local authorities or they would be held in Skyhold’s dungeon until I could judge them,” Athena didn’t make it easy on the poor kid by giving him two options.

“I guess we should turn them over to the Arl then?” Connor questioned, his voice quavered with uncertainty.

“That is up to you,” Athena smiled at him, instilling confidence in the lad.

“Yes, let’s do that,” Connor sounded more confident. (Duchess’ smile has to be graced by Andraste, I’ve never seen anyone get people to follow as quickly as she does.)

They took the attackers to the Arl of Redcliffe, who was pleasantly surprised to see Connor. Our group was thanked and offered to spend the night in the castle. Athena looked at Cullen, “A bed would be nice.”

“Then we’ll stay,” Cullen responded.

Once our lovers were in their room, Cullen kissed her passionately, “Your compassion amazes me.”

“I don’t understand?” Athena was lost as the kiss they had just shared, she had felt clear to her toes.

“What you did and said to Connor. You could have done as he wished and left him there,” Cullen smirked a little, proud that his kiss had left her breathless and a little confused.

“No, I couldn’t. He needs to forgive himself. He can’t do that if he’s dead,” Athena was certain that she had made the right choice.

Cullen took hold of her hands and pulled her to the bed, “You also could have made the decision on what to do with his attackers instead of leaving it to him.”

“He’s had so much taken away from him for a single mistake he made as a child, and now he’s terrified of himself and his powers. Being afraid leads to mistakes, big mistakes. It’s not fair,” Athena’s voice quavered a little, holding tight to her emotions.

“I don’t know if anyone else would have seen it that way. How were you able to heal him without hurting yourself?” Cullen response was gentle, they had both lived in a circle, and both of them had seen what fear could turn a mage in to.

“Morrigan has been teaching me a different way to use my abilities,” Athena almost blushed.

“How?” Cullen undressed, curious as to what her new methods were.

“It doesn’t involve lyrium or anything weird. I’m not bringing what they’re feeling in to me as much anymore. She said that every time I heal someone, I create a link with them and that’s why I can feel their pain. So, if I can block that…” Athena undressed as well.

“I’m glad,” he kissed her and they made love.


	41. Chapter 41

At Redcliffe Sparkler received notice that he was needed at home and parted ways with our heroes. The rest went back to Skyhold and there was a bit of calm, except for the planning of the wedding. It took Duchess a bit to get used to being in one place, but she eventually did… And then the word came down that an Exalted Council was being called.

We had all went back from whence we came. Athena wrote each of us to request our presence back at the Winter Palace, she mentioned nothing about the anchor hurting her. Of course we were all happy to see Duchess again. I had become Viscount of Kirkwall, Sparkler was the Tevinter Ambassador, Tiny was Tiny (granted, he stuck around because of Ruffles,) I don’t think anyone in Halamshiral was on to Seeker’s... (excuse me) Divine Victoria’s marriage. Which I found hilarious.

While at the Exalted Council, we got to fight off a Qunari invasion, found out that Solas (the prick) was actually the Dread Wolf and he claimed to have created the veil to destroy the elven gods… (Have I mentioned yet that this shit is weird? However, for the purpose of keeping this book less than two thousand pages (I do have another book on all of the other nonsense, aptly titled, ”This Shit Is Weird, The Inquisitor Trevelyan Story”) we are going to focus on the love birds.)

Athena, Cullen, and Josephine rode in to Halamshiral on great steeds and Ruffles couldn’t resist teasing Curly about his admirers. Curly of course scowled and Athena chuckled. Duchess spent most of the day catching up with everyone and finally returned to her love close to dusk. 

Cullen somehow found a dog and became fast friends… However, Curly was teaching the dog to dodge fireballs, which confused Athena, “You found a dog?”

“He’s a mabari and they’re from Fereldan. He was probably abandoned by some Orlesian noble that had tired of the novelty,” Cullen explained. (By the way, Curly is never again allowed to tease Duchess for “finding” pets.)

Athena picked up the ball and threw it for the dog, expecting him to fetch it, and was quite surprised to hear Cullen chastise it for not dodging the ball. Athena chuckled and pet the dog, “How could anyone leave you behind? Do you like to play fetch?”

The dog barked and ran after the ball she threw. Cullen griped, “He’s not supposed to fetch it.”

Athena chuckled as Cullen stood up and kissed her, “The Inquisition will change after this, I’m not sure what that means. But I’ve found certainty now, and more importantly, I’ve found love.”

“I love you, too,” Athena smiled up at him.

Cullen took hold of both of Duchess’ hands, the left more gingerly than the right as he didn’t want to hurt her, “Marry me?”

“What?” Athena thought that she didn’t hear him correctly.

“Marry me?” He asked again.

“We’re getting married after the Exalted Council is over…” Athena was hopelessly lost.

“I don’t want to wait.”

“Cullen…” Duchess was not happy to hear that all the time taken to plan their wedding would be wasted.

Cullen led her over to a bench and away from prying ears, his voice was barely above a whisper, “You’ve been crying out in your sleep, when you do the anchor flares up. I’m not sure what that means… We can still have the one that’s been planned, but I want to marry you here, now.”

“The Inquisitor marrying the Commander of the Inquisition, that will set tongues wagging,” Athena commented.

“We know a few people that can keep a secret,” Cullen smiled at her. Athena smiled back and agreed, again (as if there was any doubt.) 

They planned their secret nuptials to take place at sunrise as it was Duchess’ favorite time of day and most (all of the Winter Palace was still asleep except for Curly, Duchess, and Mother Giselle,) of the Winter Palace slumbered on. They said their vows, kissed, and joined us for breakfast. I noticed that Curly seemed hesitant to let go of Duchess and I had to comment on it, “You’ve had Duchess to yourself for a while now. You need to learn to share.”

Cullen blushed and grumbled, “Some things never change.”

Athena chuckled, “In Cullen’s defense, it’s me who doesn’t want to let him go at the moment.”

“Is there news you would like to share with us?” Sparkler asked brightly, trying to avoid telling Athena his own bad news.

“News? Besides the Exalted Council wanting to rip the Inquisition apart?” Athena returned, with an edge of worry to her voice.

“I was hoping for personal news, but I did tell you that no one would thank you for saving the world… I hate it when I’m right.” Dorian sighed.

“Duchess, no matter what happens here, you will still have us,” I assured her.

“Thank you, Varric,” Athena’s eyes looked as though they had tears in them, but I couldn’t be certain.

Curly pulled Athena closer to him and whispered that he loved her. She smiled up at him and we ate our meal… Sparkler and I had a bet going on how many times Curly would blush during the meal. I think I counted ten blushes, Sparkler is back in debt with me.

We went our separate ways so Duchess could catch up with the rest of the gang. This was when Dorian informed her that his father had been assassinated and after the wedding, he would be going home. I offered her an estate in Kirkwall, the key to the harbor, and promised we’d get in a game of Wicked Grace before I went home. Blackwall decided to go by his given name of Thom Rainier and was still trying to help people. Thom told me that it was all Duchess’ influence.

Curly was still being accosted by his many suitors, which he ignored completely as soon as Duchess came in to his line of vision. The suitors would bemoan their fate of pining after someone they couldn’t have. Before dinner I noticed that Cullen was being left alone for the minute and went over to talk to him, “Did you scare them all away?”

“I wish,” he grumbled, “I tell them that I’m in love with someone else. They know I’m getting married, and still they insist on trying to woo me!!”

I chuckled and said sympathetically, “Soon it will be official.”

I could have swore that I heard Curly mumble, “It’s official now.” But then his dog came barreling into him, barking happily.

“I see Duchess has rubbed off on you about having pets,” I laughed, “at least yours is somewhat normal.”

“He’s Fereldan, I couldn’t leave him here without a home,” Cullen scratched the dog’s ears.

“Your soon to be bride said similar things about a bear, a nug, and a horse,” I reminded him. “Speaking of, how are the wedding plans going?”

“On hold because of this council,” He complained.

“If things don’t go well here, Duchess has an estate in Kirkwall waiting for her,” I informed him.

“Sweet Andraste, I am not crossing that sea again,” Curly griped as he started looking for Athena and found her talking to Arl Teagan. He smirked, “For once, I get to rescue her.”

I laughed as I watched Curly walk to his love. As Cullen approached them he overheard Athena ask, “How is Connor?”

“Better. He has an improved outlook on life. He assures me that I have you to thank for that,” Arl Teagan responded.

“I’m glad he’s doing well.”

“Inquisitor, please understand, this isn’t personal,” the Arl tried to reassure her.

“No? After all the Inquisition has done to aid Fereldan, and you want to dismantle us? It certainly seems personal,” Athena argued.

“Fereldan has to know that its borders are secure. You have not pledged loyalty to any country. It wasn’t so long ago that Orlais had invaded Fereldan. Can you not understand our fear?” Arl Teagan explained passionately.

“I have no interest in your country except to help those that need it. Why is that not good enough for you?” Athena’s voice had an edge of steel to it as Cullen walked up behind her.

“Forgive me, Inquisitor, this can wait until the Exalted Council,” Arl Teagan bowed and moved away.

Cullen lightly touched Athena’s shoulders and half smiled when she turned to look at him, “Let’s get you away from here.”

Athena nodded and they walked arm and arm down to what was serving as a tavern for dinner. Before Athena could enjoy her meal Seeker pulled her away to give a lecture on how to propose to Cullen, which Athena found quite odd, “Cullen and I have been engaged for quite some time now, Cassandra…”

“You have been?” 

“Yes, I thought you knew that?”

“I am going to kill Varric… He let me think that you would be getting married here, instead of the original plan!” Cassandra exclaimed.

“Varric told you that we were getting married here?” Athena wondered how many spies I had on her and Curly. (I’ll never tell.)

“He said that there would be a proposal…” Seeker trailed off.

“Cullen and I eloped, but I thought no one else knew. We’re still going to have everyone come to Skyhold though,” Athena assured Seeker.

Cassandra hugged her and they went their separate ways. Athena went back to Cullen and shook her head at him before he could say anything, “We’ll talk about it later.”

They ate dinner quietly, retired early, and made love for the first time as husband and wife. Neither one really slept that night as they both wondered and worried what the morrow would bring. The Exalted Council began and Duchess was pulled away by Nightingale to investigate a dead Qunari. That’s how we found out that the Qunari were planning an invasion.

To fight the qunari, we had to go through Eluvians that led us to different places. Each time we went through one it seemed as though the anchor caused Athena more pain, which worried all of us. Needless to say, Cullen saw that his love wasn’t doing well, and didn’t know what to do to help her. One night I saw him pacing in the garden and joined him, “I thought you and Duchess would be enjoying matrimonial bliss.” (It had gotten around that they had eloped.)

Cullen half smiled, not looking at me and uttered, “I couldn’t sleep.”

“The anchor is killing her, isn’t it?” I watched him pace.

He nodded, looking out at the stars. It seemed to me as though he was searching for a way to save Athena. I wondered if he found one as he had stopped pacing.

“How long have you known?”

“The anchor started flaring up shortly before we arrived here,” Cullen sounded as though he was uncertain on if he should tell me this.

“Why not wait until the planned wedding? Why ask her to marry you now?”

“Because I love her,” his ragged sigh told me there was far more to it than love, “and should she… Once again she is facing death on all sides to protect Thedas, to protect us. I needed her to know that no matter what, she has me, forever.”

“Damn,” I choked past the lump in my throat. After clearing my throat several times to remove that infernal lump, I croaked out, “We’ll find a way to save her. Even if I have to track down Solas myself and force him to help Duchess.” (If only I knew then what I know now….)

Cullen smiled his thanks and went back to Athena. I stayed and looked out at the stars, trying to glean an answer from them.

**

Before our last trip through the Eluvian Athena and Cullen had a meeting with Leliana and Josephine where they discussed the qunari plot and how the gaatlok made it into palaces all over Southern Thedas. By this point Duchess was in almost constant pain, which she didn’t admit to anyone. But because of her pain, her temper and patience were severely shortened. Josephine was upset about how the gaatlok barrels ended up on the Inquisition manifest and was doubting why she should continue to fight. 

The anchor flared up painfully. Athena cried out, gripping her wrist with her uninjured hand and rasped, “After all we’ve done for them. Personally and trying to stop the world from ending, they are still trying to dismantle us,” she choked back a sob and with tear filled eyes looked at her husband, “I don’t want to die before… I need to get to the Davarrad and stop this.”

Cullen walked over to Athena and hugged her tightly to him. Leliana thanked Duchess and asked if the Exalted Council should be informed. Athena told her that they should be, in case she failed. After the meeting, Athena grabbed me, Sparkler, and Tiny to go with her. As we prepared to go through the Eluvian, Cullen stopped us and took Athena away from us to at least give the illusion of privacy. He whispered, “I love you. I will always love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena was crushed in his embrace. She continued, “If I don’t make it out of this…”

Cullen kissed her long and passionately to silence her. He didn’t want to entertain any idea of her not surviving. When the kiss ended he hoarsely said, “Go.” And watched us disappear through the Eluvian.

**

We fought Qunari, saved a dragon (of all things,) and followed the Vidasala to Solas. Where he had apparently been turning Qunari to stone… Athena was able to talk to him and learned of his plans to destroy the world by destroying the veil. He warned Duchess that she didn’t have much time and that the anchor would kill her. He stopped it from spreading and apologized, leaving her there.

When Athena came back to us she was weak and her left forearm had been taken over by the anchor. She collapsed and Bull rushed to catch her, we ran back through the Eluvian to get to the Winter Palace.

Cullen was waiting for her and when he saw her being carried, unconscious, he swore and took her from Bull. He ran her to the surgeon and commanded, “Cut it off.”

“Is that what the Inquisitor wants?” The surgeon asked.

“The Inquisitor needs to live. Cut. The. Arm. Off.” Cullen towered over the surgeon, understandably having no patience for silly questions. The surgeon quaked a little and prepared for surgery, taking Athena’s left arm, thus ridding her of the anchor.

When the surgery was over they moved Athena to where she could heal comfortably. It took her a few days to wake up and while we waited, Cullen refused to leave her side. He would alternate between pacing, sitting and holding her hand, and talking to her. We tried to get him to rest, but he wouldn’t hear of it. The most we could get him to do was bathe regularly as he wanted to be presentable for when Duchess awoke.

The night before Athena woke I had a heart to heart with Curly. I entered the room to see him sitting beside Athena, who was laying on a large and ornate bed. It was so large that she looked as though she could get lost in it. Cullen was holding her hand and telling her how much he loved her and that he was holding her to the promise that they would grow old together. Athena needed to do her part and wake up.

I cleared my throat to get the lump that had lodged itself there to go away. I startled him and he testily snapped, “What do you want, Varric?”

“I’m here to check on two people that I like,” I walked further in to the stark, white room. It had just been remodeled. There was a bed and several chairs, as we had all taken turns waiting for Duchess to wake up. “Have you gotten any sleep?”

“I’ll sleep when she wakes up,” Cullen’s eyes never left Athena’s pale face.

“And if she needs you when she wakes up?” 

“Then I’ll sleep when she doesn’t need me,” He snapped.

“That bed is large enough for you to lay with her and not even come close to her,” I was determined that he would at least rest, if not for his sake, then for Athena’s.

Cullen sat there silently holding his wife’s hand and caressed her hair away from her face. He rasped out, “She’s everything to me. I cannot lose her.”

“The surgeon said there was no sign of infection, the surgery was a success and that it would take a couple days for Athena to wake. Her body needs this time to heal. She’s going to be fine,” I tried to reassure him.

“It’s been four days, Varric,” Cullen didn’t look at me, but I could hear the tears in his voice.

“We also haven’t had a decent sunrise in that time,” I quietly quipped.

I heard Curly choke back a laugh, “I wish she wouldn’t wait on a decent sunrise.”

“It’s her favorite time of day,” I smiled, glad to see a crack in his taciturn shell (he was starting to remind me of Seeker, and that is never a good thing.)

“After all she’s done for us, she deserves to have a life,” Cullen murmured to himself.

“And she’ll get it, with you.” Cullen briefly looked at me and thanked me. I left, feeling that I somewhat succeeded in my mission. 

**

The next morning dawned, beautiful and bright. As the rising sun streamed through the windows, its rays lighted upon the bed, and as if by magic, Duchess opened her violet eyes for the first time in days. As Athena looked to her right she saw Cullen sitting beside her, dozing. Duchess’ lips quirked into a smile as she studied her sleeping husband. 

Curly had several days of beard growth, which she had never before seen on him. His blonde hair was also disheveled and even though he was sleeping, Cullen was holding on to Athena’s hand like it was his life line.

Athena went to move her left hand so she could caress her husband’s stubble, but found that it wasn’t there. The memories of Solas and how the anchor was killing her came rushing back and she cried out.

Cullen was instantly awake and on his feet. When he saw who made the sound, his brown eyes filled with tears and he rasped out, “Thank the Maker!”

“Cullen, why can’t I use my left arm?”

“Bull carried you back, unconscious. The anchor was killing you… I told the surgeon to cut your arm off," He explained softly as he gingerly sat beside her on the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“It feels like my arm should still be there, but when I go to move it… Nothing happens.”

“The surgeon said that that feeling might persist for some time. Are you in pain?” Cullen wanted desperately to crush her to him, but showed amazing restraint because he didn’t want to hurt her.

“Pain? No… How long was I unconscious?” Athena moved to sit up… Barely awake for five minutes and already tired of laying in bed.

“Five, maybe six days. Dorian said that it seemed as though time moved differently while you were hopping through Eluvians,” Cullen was unable to stop touching her.

“I don’t remember time moving faster or slower than normal,” Athena wondered if her cousin hadn’t made something up just to worry Cullen more.

“In his defense, you were dying. Since you were brought back…” Cullen sighed and raked a hand through his disheveled locks, “through your surgery and waiting for you to wake… It felt like a lifetime had passed.”

“Cullen…” Athena’s thought was interrupted by the door to her chambers opening.

“It is good to see you awake, Inquisitor,” the surgeon said as he came in to change the dressing on what was left of her arm.

“It’s good to be awake,” Athena watched the surgeon unwrap the dressing.

“You may want to look away. While infection has not set in, the wound is still raw and somewhat open. It is not a pretty sight.” The surgeon warned her.

“I’ve seen and healed my fair share of severed limbs,” Athena reassured him.

“But it is far different when the limb missing is your own.” The surgeon continued his work, now understanding why he was warned that the Inquisitor was not the best patient to have.

“It feels as though it should still be there. I need to see it,” Athena was certain.

The surgeon looked doubtfully at Cullen, who shrugged his shoulders. Cullen was not going to presume to tell Athena what she could and could not look at on her own body. The surgeon sighed and continued his work, “What you are describing is perfectly normal. The feeling should fade, in time.”

Athena gasped as the last of the dressing came away, “It really isn’t there.”

Cullen gently squeezed her hand, “How long will it take for the Inquisitor to heal?”

“A few weeks, unless you know of a mage healer. The sensation the Inquisitor is describing will last longer.”

Cullen half snorted, “The only mage healer I implicitly trust is the one I’m holding hands with.”

Athena couldn’t help but chuckle at the sincerity in Curly’s tone, “I’ve never been able to heal myself. I’m sure Mother Giselle knows of one.”

“Is that what you would like to do, Inquisitor? The mage healer will help it heal faster, but you will still need time.” 

“I understand that. And yes, the longer I have to stay abed, the more unbearable I become,” Athena looked over at Curly, wondering what his response would be.

Cullen laughed softly and ordered the surgeon to talk to Mother Giselle. As the surgeon left he offered this caution, “Do not be surprised if you tire easily. Also keep the visitors to a minimum and do not over exert yourself.”

“Keep visitors to a minimum and do not over exert myself… He doesn’t know me very well does he?” Athena chuckled after the door closed.

“There’s not much I can do about the visitors, but I can keep your activities to a minimum.” Cullen stated.

Athena sighed in frustration, rolling her shoulders uncomfortably, “I’m guessing the Exalted Council still wants to dismantle or control the Inquisition?”

“We will talk about that after you heal with Leliana and Josephine,” Cullen used his Commander’s voice on her.

“Why Commander Cullen, I believe that’s the first time you’ve used that tone on me,” She teased him, trying to get him to stop worrying.

He narrowed his eyes at her, “Don’t make me use it again.”

“Cullen, I’m going to be fine. I don’t have ancient elven magic trying to take over my body anymore. Have you slept at all?”

“Athena…” He choked out, closing his tear filled eyes and kissing her hand.

“Cullen, lay with me?” Athena entreated, knowing that if she pressed him about if he had slept, he would say no.

“Are you tired?” Just that fast worry and fear were back in his voice.

“I want to feel your arms around me. I want your body pressed to mine.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Cullen rasped out.

“You won’t…” Cullen gave her a tortured look that said he didn’t believe her. Athena sighed, “If it worries you so much, lay on my right side.”

“You aren’t going to take no for an answer will you?”

“Don’t make me get out of this bed,” Duchess threatened.

Cullen sighed, knowing that if he didn’t do as she asked, she would do exactly as she threatened. As he laid beside her he hid his face in her hair to hide his tears, “I nearly lost you.”

Athena’s right arm wrapped around Cullen’s waist, “I’m still here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

With her finally in his arms and her assurance of staying, Cullen was finally able to sleep.

It didn’t take long for word to spread that Duchess was awake and as predicted, the flow of visitors was constant. Curly would stand beside Athena with his arms crossed, glaring at everyone. If Athena shifted uncomfortably he would kick everyone out. Which we all complained about. After the mage healer healed Athena, Cullen relaxed a bit more though he was still reluctant to leave her side.

As Athena correctly guessed, the Exalted Council continued. When she was fully healed, she informed the Council that the Inquisition would answer to no one, except for the Divine and that they would stay as her peace keeping force. Seeker approved. There was a final discussion to get Chuckles to see the error of his ways and then we left Halamshiral behind to go and celebrate our lovers’ official wedding.


	42. Chapter 42

On our return to Skyhold Arthur gave Athena’s phylactery to her, “Cullen was right, this is yours to keep or destroy as you wish.”

“You want me to destroy it?” Athena turned the phylactery over in her hand and watched the sunlight glint off of its contents. She finally sat it on her desk.

“I would feel safer knowing that no one could harm you through it.”

Athena smiled, grateful that the decision was being left to her, “I’ll think about it.”

“I believe my future son-in-law wants a rematch at chess. Are you interested in watching?” 

“I can’t. I have dress fittings, food tasting, wine tasting, and I have to make sure Josephine isn’t going to lose her sanity,” Athena sighed in frustration.

“Is it going to be that big?” He was surprised that his daughter would allow such a big event.

“It is. I think she’s invited half of Thedas,” Athena grumbled, grabbing a chocolate chip cookie from off of her table.

Arthur chuckled softly, “It’s good to know you still love chocolate chip cookies. Are they still your favorite thing to eat?”

“They are… Especially Mia’s,” Athena chuckled as she heard Cullen groan as he came out of the garderobe.

“I’m very glad that she isn’t coming for another week,” Curly paused to kiss her, “before she left South Reach I received several letters a day from her.”

“You’ll survive,” Athena smirked at Cullen and then asked, “Father, before you steal Cullen away from me for the afternoon, would you mind if he and I talked privately?”

“Not at all, my dear,” Arthur nodded his head and walked down stairs, away from the couple.

“You could come and at least watch,” Cullen followed her to her desk.

“No, I can’t. Just be glad that I’m not dragging you in to Josie’s meetings with me,” Athena reminded him.

Cullen kissed her and whispered, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Will you keep this for me?” She picked up her phylactery, “At least until I decide what to do with it?”

“Of course, but why don’t you want to hold onto it?” Curly asked.

“Because it’s… Weird,” Athena shivered as if a cool breeze had blown through her.

Cullen chuckled softly, taking the phylactery from her and whispered against her lips, “Athena, I love you.”

“I love you too, but I fail to see what that has to do with you holding on to that,” Athena waved her hand at the enchanted vial of blood.

“Phylactery,” Cullen supplied, “you’ve been talking to Varric too much.”

“I find it incredibly weird, especially since blood magic isn’t supposed to be used, and blood was drawn from me and any Mage living in a circle and enchanted,” She grumbled.

“You can destroy it,” Cullen suggested.

“I know. It’s just that… I forgot about it until my father gave it to me and I would rather focus on our wedding instead of that,” Athena kissed him.

“So you’re giving it to me to worry about?” Curly raised an eyebrow.

“You know more about it than I do. I’d put it in a desk drawer and forget about it,” she blushed.

He shook his head, chuckling, “I’ll find a safe place.” He kissed her, which was interrupted.

“Athena!” Ruffles exclaimed as she came up the stairs and stood on the opposite side of the room, with her arms crossed.

Athena sighed, “I don’t tell you and Bull not to kiss.”

“I’m not constantly late or pulling disappearing acts,” Josephine chided.

“You cannot blame me for running out on Lord Everett… He wanted to show me his weird collection of body parts,” Athena shuddered in revulsion.

“They’re not real!” Ruffles exclaimed.

“I don’t care! They have a stench to them that is unbearable!” Athena exclaimed as our trio walked to the main hall.

“They didn’t smell the last time he brought them,” Josephine thought Duchess was making a big deal over of nothing.

“They do now,” Athena shuddered again.

Cullen chuckled and kissed her, “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me?”

“No thanks. I had the pleasure of watching you two play and Dorian pace yesterday,” Athena gently refused.

“Dorian won’t be there,” Cullen smiled at her.

“Commander, I need her today,” Ruffles quirked an eyebrow as she watched Athena grab another cookie.

Athena noticed and after taking a bite, “I didn’t have breakfast!”

“Why?” Cullen was now very curious.

“I overslept,” Athena blushed.

“We weren’t up that late last night,” Cullen’s curiosity turned to concern.

Athena shrugged, “At times I do get hungry and I do get tired. How often am I chastised for not eating or sleeping? And now you two are worried because I’m doing both."

Cullen had the grace to blush, “Have… fun?” He kissed her and left.

“So long as Lord Everett doesn’t produce a severed limb, I think I’ll be fine,” Athena told his retreating back.

Ruffles chuckled as they walked in to her office and Athena finished off her cookie, “You never used to be bothered by his collection. Why now?”

“It smells…. And looks like rotting flesh. Can you tell that it’s fake?” Athena asked.

“You know, I haven’t seen it recently,” Josephine said.

“I have, it’s gross,” Athena shuddered as she sat down.

“Enough of Lord Everett… Are you excited?” Ruffles sat down beside Athena and grabbed her lists of guests, caterers, and Maker knows what else.

“Excited and nervous,” Duchess looked at the papers sitting on Ruffles’ lap like they might attack her.

“Why are you nervous?”

“I’ve seen your guest list,” Athena griped.

Ruffles laughed, “You told me I could.” 

“I know… I guess I just didn’t expect them to be arriving already.”

“Have you and Cullen decided on where you’re going after you’re married?” Josephine took notes.

“He hasn’t told me, but I’m hoping it’s the lake we first went to.”

“You’re letting him plan where you’re going?” Ruffles was astounded by what she was hearing.

“He’s good at planning quiet things, Josie, and we haven’t had much down time lately,” Athena defended her husband.

Ruffles conceded the point by nodding and moved on, “Tomorrow will be your final fitting for your dress. The Royal family of Fereldan will be arriving some time today.”

“Why?” Athena was surprised by the news.

“Athena, you know they adore you and Cullen. From what Leliana says they want to spend some time with you before the wedding.”

“They wanted to dismantle the Inquisition and the wedding is still two weeks away,” Athena sighed wearily, “Has anyone told Morrigan?”

“No, why would I?”

“They’re not coming to see Cullen and I. They want to see Kieran,” Athena announced with certainty.

“Alistair is his father…” 

“Kieran is all Morrigan has, and I don’t want to see Kieran forced to choose between his parents, unintentional or not. I need to let Morrigan know,” Athena stood and yawned.

“Athena!” Josephine was shocked that she was yawning.

“What?” Duchess was confused and a little irritated by her friend’s exclamation.

“Were you not able to sleep last night?”

“I slept fine, Josie. I’m just tired today.”

“Maybe you should take a nap before you talk to Morrigan,” Josephine suggested.

“I’m fine. Are we still on for dinner?”

“Yes, That’s if I can get Bull to stop his marathon training sessions. He says it’s in honor of your wedding,” Ruffles wondered at her lover’s motivation. “I’m surprised the Commander hasn’t joined in.”

“I don’t think he knows about them. If he does find out, Darius is going to be in trouble for not telling him sooner,” Athena and Josephine left her office to come into the main hall.

“Why?” Josephine waved at me.

“Because he’s the one that decided to organize these gauntlet matches,” Athena explained before they went their separate ways.

Athena smiled as she saw Kieran and Ana playing together. Morrigan noticed her watching them, “Hello.”

Duchess smiled warmly at her friend, “Hello.”

“I trust all is well?” 

Athena hesitated, and then forged ahead, “Alistair and Selene are arriving today.”

“Thank you for telling me, and I hope you do not mind, but I invited them to come early. Kieran deserves to know his father,” Morrigan explained. 

Athena sighed in relief, “And you deserve to have more than one friend.”

Morrigan chuckled, “You are too kind. Is all well with you? You look tired today.”

“I overslept this morning,” Athena said, more to herself than Morrigan.

“You’ve been doing what I taught you when you use your magic?” Kieran ran up to hug Athena and his mother.

“I have been. I’m surprised Cullen hasn’t thanked you,” Athena chuckled as the kids went off to play again.

“Oh, he has,” Morrigan responded and at that moment Lord Everett came out with his collection of body parts.

“Maker, no,” Athena whispered and closed her eyes.

“Athena?” Morrigan found it odd that Athena would swear, especially about another person.

“Have you seen this collection of Lord Everett’s?” Athena opened her violet eyes to keep a wary eye on the lord.

“I have not. In fact, until today, I had no idea who he was.”

“It’s of body parts,” Athena tried to not gag or shudder.

“And that disturbs you?” 

“I keep being told that they’re fake… But they smell disgusting.” Almost as if Lord Everett heard Duchess, he opened the case of body parts and the scent of them travelled through the air, reaching the ladies. Athena coughed and gagged, “I think I’m going to be ill.”

Morrigan did the same, “I understand. Kieran! Ana!” The children came over to her, “We should go inside and away from that awful stench.” And all four of them bolted for the door.

Once inside Athena and Morrigan took a deep breath of clean air. As they sat at a table that had cookies and brownies on it, Morrigan asked, “ This Lord Everett is not staying for the wedding is he?”

“Sweet Andraste! I hope not!” Athena feared for her wedding.

Leliana sat down beside Morrigan, “Why are you in here?” 

"Lord Everett’s “collection” invaded the garden,” Athena smiled at Kieran and Ana who were eating brownies.

“It cannot be that bad,” Leliana was doubtful.

“His “collection” smells as though 'tis diseased,” Morrigan grimaced.

“The Fallow Mire!” Athena suddenly remembered where the stench came from, “There had been signs of a plague there. Please, tell me he didn’t dig up their bodies?!”

“I thought his collection was made of wax,” Leliana continued her investigation.

“It may have been at one time… ‘Tis not anymore.”

“I’ll have an agent look in to it. Alistair and Selene were looking for you and Kieran, I told them that you would be in the garden….” Leliana said to Morrigan.

“Get it away you nitwit! Can’t you see that she’s pregnant!” Alistair yelled, helping his wife inside, “Why in Andraste’s name would anyone want a collection of severed body parts!” He continued his indignant speech as he helped Selene sit down. “And why is he here?! What purpose does it serve to bring that stench filled thing along!”

“Alistair,” Selene said softly, placing a hand on her belly where a baby bump resided, “the door is closed, he can’t hear you anymore.”

"Still…” Alistair trailed off, just now noticing that he had an audience.

“Leliana can we get this collection to disappear, please?” Athena almost begged and under her breath included, “Now maybe Josephine will believe me.”

“I will see that it leaves Skyhold as soon as possible. Josie knows?”

“She knows I think it’s disgusting, but she kept telling me that it’s wax.”

“That was not the smell of wax. That was the smell of rotting flesh,” Alistair restated.

Selene turned pale, “Alistair, I really don’t need a reminder.”

Alistair sat down beside her, immediately contrite, “I’m sorry, my love.”

“It’s good to know I’m not the only one turned off by that. I was actually starting to question myself. No one else said that they could smell it,” Athena said.

“Have all their noses been cut off?!” Morrigan asked, in a tone that only Morrigan knew how to do. (A little indignant, a little snarky, and a little bit of wonderment.)

Athena laughed, “You would think so.” 

Kieran and Ana were doing cartwheels in the hall and had the adults chuckling. Selene asked, “Who is the young lady?”

“Her name is Ana, she is the daughter of Cullen’s second in command,” Athena explained.

“Ana loves to tell the story of how the Inquisitor saved her from her mother who turned in to a red lyrium giant. She also tells the story of how you also saved her from a spirit that was possessing her and because of you she won’t have to use lyrium to access her abilities,” Morrigan knew it would get Athena to blush.

“Did she tell you all that?” Athena blushed, pleasantly shocked. Morrigan nodded and Duchess continued, “She barely says two words to me.”

“You are her hero, and she is terrified of disappointing you,” Morrigan responded as they continued to watch the children play.

“So she doesn’t talk to me?” Athena was a bit put off by this revelation.

“'Tis the mind of a child, no?”

“True. I was terrified of disappointing the first-enchanter and knight-commander at my circle. They were the first people in my life to show that they cared about me,” Athena half smiled.

“Alistair, why don’t you take the children out to watch the gauntlet matches,” Selene’s color returned to her cheeks and she adjusted herself to find a more comfortable sitting position.

“I barely know how to handle our own daughter. Much less two ten year olds!” Alistair exclaimed.

“The Commander’s fighting!” Kieran said excitedly. Alistair ushered the children out, grumbling.

“Josie’s going to panic,” Leliana chuckled.

"Andraste preserve me," Athena sighed, "You know I'm the one that's going to get yelled at, Leliana. Especially if he gets hurt.”

“So heal him before she sees,” Nightingale suggested.

“I am not going out there,” Athena laughed.

“I’m going to,” Leliana followed Alistair and the children. 

**

Cullen was sparring with Sparkler (it really was a good thing that she didn’t come out.) Curly, of course, won easily as Dorian has no talent for sparring if he can’t use magic. Dorian griped, “I would tell Athena on you, but all she would do is laugh at me.” 

“Athena knew these were going on?” Cullen readied for his next opponent, which was Darius.

“I don’t know… She gets great amusement out of my defeats,” Sparkler moaned, “It’s bad enough Darius set these things up with Bull.”

“You organized this and didn’t tell me?” Cullen growled low as he glared at his second in command.

“I was under orders,” Darius protested.

“From who?” Cullen menaced, stalking his prey.

“I can’t say,” Darius hunkered down low and waited for Curly to make the first move.

“I am your commander, you will tell me,” Cullen rushed at him like a lightning bolt flashed across the sky. Darius caught him and a true sparring match ensued. Kieran cheered Cullen on until he saw the crestfallen look on Ana’s face and he started cheering for Darius.

“I think someone has a crush,” Leliana said quietly to Morrigan as Morrigan stood beside her after she left Selene and Athena alone to talk.

Morrigan chuckled, “‘Twould appear so.”

Darius heard the switch and smirked, “Kieran’s on my side now.”

“You’re still not going to win,” Cullen growled as they locked up again. Cullen did finally win and asked, “Who told you to not tell me?”

“A certain spymaster didn’t want you hurt before you married,” Darius chuckled, sweating, and out of breath

"Commander, it has been forever since Alistair sparred with someone,” Morrigan volunteered, smirking at Alistair.

“It has not!” Alistair gave an “I hate you” look to Morrigan.

“Please, father?” Kieran asked hopefully.

Alistair looked at his son’s hopeful and shining face and sighed, “I’ll do it. If I get hurt, Selene is not going to be happy with you, Morrigan.”

“I’ll live,” Morrigan smirked again and tilted her head.

"Would the Commander really hurt him?” Kieran questioned his mother, worried.

"No, the Commander would not really hurt the King,” Cullen reassured Kieran.

“He’s more likely to hurt himself, Kieran,” Selene said softly, standing beside the boy.

“You have never had any faith in my sparring abilities,” Alistair groused.

“Once you stop tramping on my feet when we dance, I may think differently,” Selene winked at her husband.

“The Inquisitor still has no desire to see her love spar?” Morrigan asked after Duchess.

“She said that it would probably end with the Commander and her father sparring and she has no desire to see that. The Inquisitor also said that she was tired and had some reading to do,” Selene answered.

“She’s tired?” Cullen stopped suddenly, thinking that was unlike Athena. Which awarded Alistair a take down on Curly.

“Anything else, Selene? I could really use your help,” Alistair squeaked out because Curly had his head in a headlock.

“Not really. At least, nothing I want to talk about out here,” Selene answered, “She did say that she missed Mia’s chocolate chip cookies though.”

Leliana laughed, “Josie’s going to kill her.”

“Why? And who is Mia?” Morrigan was surprised to hear a name she didn’t recognize.

“Because the kitchen staff uses the recipe Mia gave them. Mia is the Commander’s older sister,” Leliana explained.

Cullen groaned, “I’m so glad my sister isn’t going to be here for another week.”

“At least your love is wise enough to stay away,” Alistair watched who he was talking about get jostled by the crush of the crowd and did not pay attention to Curly who was able to sweep the king’s feet out from under him and pin him.

"True,” Cullen helped Alistair up after his win.

“What are you doing?! You are getting married in a fortnight! Get out of there! You cannot get injured before your wedding!” Ruffles yelled as she ran up the stairs. “Where’s the Inquisitor?”

Morrigan chuckled, “She wisely stayed away.”

"Are you telling me that she doesn't know that he's sparring?" Josephine asked hopefully.

“She knows. She dislikes the idea of her father and her soon to be husband sparring and had other plans,” Selene chuckled with Morrigan.

“Why would she not stop him?” Josephine asked.

“Can you stop Bull?” Leliana was fighting laughter.

“No, but I fail to see the importance of that,” Ruffles said, mystified.

“Think about it Josie,” Leliana turned her attention back to the sparring ring as Curly and Arthur were sizing each other up for the best way to attack, “And we have why Athena is not here.” 

“And she’s tired,” Alistair was loud enough for the combatants to hear as he stood beside his wife and put an arm around her.

“That only works once. Right, Dorian?” Cullen joked as he and Arthur were in the middle of a test of strength.

“Shut up!” Sparkler grumbled. 

Cullen and Arthur sparred for a surprisingly long time. Arthur commented, “It appears this is going the way of our chess matches.”

“That it does,” Cullen chuckled as they locked up again.

Selene looked up at Alistair, “I’m going inside.”

“Are you all right?” Alistair did not hide his worry well.

“I want to sit down, you can stay and watch if you wish,” Selene smiled at him.

“I think I’ll join you.”

Selene gave a slightly frustrated sigh as they both left to go into the main hall, “Commander, if the Inquisitor ever finds herself with child, please don’t treat her as though she cannot do anything for herself.”

Cullen stopped dead, and Arthur took him down for the pin. Arthur chuckled, “Sorry, my boy, I couldn’t stop.”

“It’s all right,” Cullen stood and shook his hand, “I shouldn’t have gotten distracted and I would like to know what my soon to be wife is doing.” (No one that stayed in Skyhold knew that Curly and Duchess had eloped, so we all played it off as this was their first ceremony.)

Arthur chuckled, “Give her my apologies for taking up the majority of your time today.”

“I will,” Cullen said. On his way out of the ring he ruffled Kieran’s hair and smiled at Ana, who blushed and smiled back. The crowd dispersed and Curly went up to Athena’s quarters to check on her. He found Duchess laying on the couch with a book in front of her and she was asleep. He smiled because her auburn hair had once again fallen to cover her face and he wondered how she was able to breathe through it. Cullen crouched down in front of her, marked the page she was on, closed the book, and gently moved the hair out of her face.

Athena yawned, stretched her arm out (nearly hitting Cullen) and opened her violet eyes. She smiled seeing Curly, “I didn’t think I’d see you until I had to drag you away from my father for dinner.”

“It is nearly dinner time,” Cullen chuckled softly.

“It is?!” Athena was shocked that she slept so long. She started to sit up and groaned, “Laying on this was a bad idea.”

“Are you hurt?” Cullen sat beside her.

“I’m stiff. I think I would have fared better with your desk,” Athena rubbed her neck and her hair hid her face from Curly’s appreciative view again.

“I don’t think sleeping on my desk is a good idea,” Cullen said softly.

“Maybe not… But it is good for other things,” she smiled seductively and kissed him.

Cullen pulled away before he got lost to desire and taking her hand he asked, “Are you ill?”

“I don’t think so. Why?” Athena was confused.

“You got a decent night’s sleep last night. You slept in, and you’re just now waking from a nap?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“I feel fine... except for the tired part,” Athena smiled at him, “I would tell you if I wasn’t feeling well.”

Cullen kissed her in thanks and they both started to shift so they could access more of the couch to make love. Athena groaned as she remembered the dinner plans. She broke off the kiss and whispered, “We can’t.”

“Why not?” Cullen was surprised that she stopped.

“Because we promised that we would have dinner with everyone tonight,” Athena reminded him.

Cullen sighed, “I remember,” and then he smirked, “we could always be late…”

Athena shook her head at him, “We promised.”

“Then I guess we’ll have to continue this later,” Cullen smiled at her.

“Thank you,” Athena smiled back and they left her quarters to join us for dinner.

I was the first to see our lovers enter the hall. I smirked and said, “I was expecting you two to be late.”

“I hope you didn’t bet on it,” Athena smiled at me and then blushed as Cullen whispered in her ear.

“Sparkler’s not here yet,” I said by way of an explanation for not having a bet going, “Was Curly actually encouraging you to be late?” They both turned a very becoming shade of red. I laughed, “Good on you, Curly.”

Dorian, Darius, and Arthur all came in at the same time. Sparkler was the first to comment, “They’re blushing already… Tonight is going to be fantastic!”

Athena got a plate full of food and shook her head at us as she started eating. I noticed and couldn’t resist, “You two weren’t up there long enough to work up an appetite… What did you do to Athena, Curly?”

“For as much grief as I get for not eating, can’t you just be happy that I’m having what you deem a normal meal?” Athena sounded as though she was irritated (I knew it was her teasing irritated voice.)

“It’s not normal for you. Especially when we have to constantly remind you to eat,” Sparkler groused raising an eyebrow at Duchess.

Athena looked at Cullen for help. He chuckled and shook his head, digging in to his own plate of food. Duchess smiled wickedly, “I’ll let Josie know that you were kind enough to give me the day off from the wedding meetings tomorrow.”

Cullen stopped eating, “You wouldn’t…”

“I don’t want to get yelled at for you sparring today,” Athena still had that wicked smile and silk in her voice.

“There is no need to worry, my dear. Cullen’s already been yelled at for that,” Arthur reassured her.

“I knew he was doing it and I didn’t try to stop him. I’ll get yelled at. It won’t be the first time, or the last,” Athena looked at Cullen.

“I haven’t done anything for you to get yelled at,” Curly griped, confused.

“No? Then why did I get yelled at for you, Bull, and Darius having a drinking match and then sparring?” Athena smirked. Dorian and I lost it laughing.

“That wasn’t my idea. If Josephine wants to blame anyone it should be her fiancé as it was his idea,” Cullen blushed.

“Considering I was fighting my way through Eluvians when this happened. I’m thinking that I shouldn’t even know about it…” Athena trailed off.

Bull and Ruffles walked in, “Kadan, I told you that was his bachelor party.”

“You told me after I had already spoke to her about it,” Ruffles sat down beside Athena, “and Athena isn’t getting any of those parties because of Halamshiral.”

“Athena doesn’t want those parties,” Duchess mumbled, mostly to herself. Cullen overheard her and started laughing.

“Considering you don't drink and the Commander would probably kill anyone that tried to spar with you… You’re not going to get those parties,” Darius chuckled.

“I’m sure you and Nightingale could come up with something,” I encouraged Ruffles.

“I don’t want Leliana planning anything that has to do with Athena and parties,” Cullen commanded.

Athena chuckled, “You don’t want my small clothes pinned to a chantry board?”

“Maker, no!” Cullen exclaimed, his eyes wide, staring at Duchess as if she had suddenly grown two heads.

“It wouldn’t be yours Athena. It would be your love’s,” Selene joined us.

Alistair blushed, “Why? Why are you telling this now?”

“To give the Commander warning,” Selene smiled at him.

“Halamshiral doesn’t have a chantry board does it?” Athena inquired.

“I believe it does. Why are you asking, Athena?” Josephine returned.

“I wondered why Leliana was going through your stuff…” Athena trailed off looking at Cullen.

Curly closed his eyes and groaned, “The letters,” he paused and said so quietly that barely anyone heard him, “I’m going to kill her.”

“I doubt that she would have put a name on them,” Athena chuckled.

“You didn’t notice that they were missing?” I found this hilarious.

“This is all speculation until Leliana admits to it… Not that she will,” Selene smiled.

“The king’s small clothes ended up somewhere they weren’t supposed to be, I take it?” Arthur wondered.

Selene chuckled, “They did indeed. Only instead of a chantry board they were pinned to the door of Denerim’s castle and the door to our bedroom.” As she told the story Alistair blushed profusely.

“She wouldn’t,” Cullen looked a little pale.

“When did this happen?” Athena was trying not to chuckle.

“The night of our wedding. I’ve never been an early riser, but Alistair’s swearing woke me up at sunrise. When I found out why, I couldn’t stop laughing,” Selene explained.

Curly paled further, “Instead of leaving the day after, would you like to leave right after the ceremony?”

Athena laughed, “I’m sure Leliana has something different planned for us. Just as embarrassing, but something different.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Cullen mumbled as Athena grabbed a cookie.

We watched Athena eat the cookie in silence, which annoyed her, “You’ve never seen me eat a cookie before?”

“Not after clearing a plateful of food,” Sparkler quipped.

“You have been eating more than you usually do, Athena,” Ruffles politely commented.

“And that’s a bad thing?” Athena questioned, incredulous.

“No, it’s not,” Cullen answered brusquely, trying to save his wife from an interrogation.

I chuckled and decided to save Curly and Duchess from the next line of questioning, by saying, “We need to get in a game of Wicked Grace before you two get married.”

“I would like that,” Athena smiled at me and everyone nodded in agreement including the royals. Who had to leave to take care of little Marie.

“We have some unfinished business to attend to as well,” Cullen raised an eyebrow at Duchess.

“Unfinished business that had her blushing when you two came down,” I quipped.

“And with that… Goodnight,” Athena stood and walked over to the door to her quarters so she could hide her blush. Curly chuckled and followed her.

Safely away from us Cullen asked as they were laying in bed after making love, “Did you have a good time tonight?”

“I did,” Athena smiled, “you?”

“Mostly. Leliana worries me,” Cullen stroked her shoulder.

“Don’t worry, I’ll still love you,” Athena teased as she wrinkled her nose at him.

“You better,” he kissed her and then asked, “did you want a party akin to what Bull did?”

“No! This game of wicked grace will be my “party.” Plus…” She kissed his lips and kept kissing him until she reached his chest and with a sultry voice she almost whispered, “I want to get you naked as often as I can.” 

Cullen growled low in his throat and flipped her on her back, and whispered, “You need but say the word.” And they surrendered to the throes of ecstasy.

**

The week and a half it took to get to our evening of Wicked Grace flew by with preparations and guests arriving hourly. Athena was still sleeping and eating more than usual but we all thought it was because of the craziness with the wedding, and possibly because of losing most of her arm. Cullen had been busy getting the soldiers ready while he was going to be away and planning their wedding trip and no, he has not told Duchess where they were going…

“Cullen, you could at least give me a hint,” Athena almost begged.

“No, you will find out when we get there,” Cullen sighed. He had been getting questioned about it every chance Duchess could get… So much that she even got Ruffles and Nightingale in on it.

“Still no luck, Duchess?” I asked as Ruffles started dealing out the cards.

“No, but I guess that’s all the more reason for tonight isn’t it?” She smiled wickedly and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“It doesn’t matter what happens tonight. I’m still not going to tell you,” Curly responded as the royal couple joined us.

“Lord Everett left today with his… collection. I told him that he was welcome back but not his collection,” Josephine hoped to change the subject.

“Thank the Maker,” was heard simultaneously from Athena and Selene.

The rest of us chuckled and I asked, “Who’s willing to lay odds on Curly losing his clothes first?”

Athena mischievously smiled while Cullen blushed and grumbled, “Athena’s not the only one that’s been getting lessons.”

“You and Alistair have been spending a lot of time together…” Athena raised an eyebrow at him, surprised that with Curly’s disdain of nobility that he was spending so much time with the King.

“If Cullen has been getting lessons from my husband, he’s going to lose,” Selene teased.

“So little faith in my ability to play wicked grace,” Alistair moaned.

"How do you know that I’ve been spending time with Alistair? We’ve barely seen each other,” Cullen complained as he looked askance at Athena.

“Who do you think I’ve been spending time with?” 

“Our bed,” Cullen grumbled softly.

Athena gasped in response and said sarcastically, “No, I don’t have duties, obligations, or wedding stuff to do.”

“That’s not what I meant... You’re usually asleep by the time I’m able to be free,” Cullen felt an intense need to defend himself. (I had to hide a chuckle as he was blushing profusely.)

“Maybe if you weren’t working until after midnight I wouldn’t be sleeping…” Athena rejoined, causing Curly to blush even more.

“Curly, what happened? I thought your workaholic days were behind you?” I was unable to keep my chuckling to myself.

“It’s been a busy week, and I usually have mornings free,” Cullen argued as he cocked an eyebrow at Athena. (At this point everyone had looked at their cards except our lovers.)

“I don’t,” Athena said simply.

“And you sleep until breakfast is delivered,” Curly was merciless and Duchess blushed bright red.

“Wait… Athena isn’t getting up with the sun anymore?! What did you do to her?” Sparkler asked as he won the hand.

“You complained for years that I wasn’t getting enough sleep, and now that I am, you’re still not happy!” Athena shot violet daggers at her cousin.

“You’re also eating more now,” I teased.

“Andraste save me,” Athena sighed in irritation.

Cullen chuckled and kissed her, “I still love you.” Which was greeted with a chorus of awws, causing our lovers to blush. And that was pretty much how the night went with plenty of teasing and laughs. The night ended with both Cullen and Alistair losing more than their shirts.

Athena laughed, “Sorry, my love,” and kissed him.

Selene chuckled, “Why Alistair... I thought I was the only one that was allowed to see you naked.”

“Very funny, Selene,” Alistair griped as everyone but Cullen, Athena, and the royals left... laughing.

“Should we take bets on which of our loves will stand first?” Selene smiled at Athena.

Athena chuckled, “Cullen’s done this once before.”

“Woman,” Curly growled in warning.

“I only desire to see one person naked…” Athena dropped to a sultry whisper in his ear, “and that’s you.” She then stood with Curly’s clothes in hand, wished the royals goodnight, and left Curly there blushing.

“Do not get any ideas from Athena,” Alistair warned. 

“Have you forgotten that I’m carrying your child and there’s one that needs a bed time story?” Selene asked imperially as she stood and walked out with Alistair’s clothes in hand, not waiting for an answer.

Alistair and Cullen looked at each other and then ran in opposite directions. Cullen caught up with Athena in her quarters as she was getting undressed to go to bed. When she saw him a wicked smile lit her face, “I was starting to think I was going to have to send out a search party for you.”

“Woman,” Curly growled low and grabbed her by the waist, kissing her. They toppled on to the bed and made love. Once their passions had been sated he grumbled, “You could have left me something to walk back in.”

“Where would the fun be in that?” Athena yawned.

Curly shook his head, not responding to her question as he was blushing again and chose to again address the more sleep issue Athena was having. With losing her arm he wanted to make certain the two were not related, “Are you sure you’re feeling all right?”

“Yes, I feel fine. Getting sleep is usually considered a good thing."

“When you get a decent night’s sleep you usually don’t need to nap. Even after waking from your surgery, you didn’t nap,” Cullen caressed her shoulder in little circles.

“Besides Leliana, who’s spying on me now?” Athena yawned again.

“Josephine. She keeps saying that I’m keeping you up too late at night.”

Duchess sighed, getting quite irritated with all of the worry, “I’ve told her repeatedly that you’re not. Even though we married at the Winter Palace, everyone we left behind doesn’t know that so… We do kind of have a life changing event coming up in two days. Does it bother you that I’m eating and sleeping more?” 

“Am I bothered by it? No, but I had gotten used to you waking me up, and now it’s the other way around. I’m slightly concerned as sleeping in is not normal for you.” Cullen explained.

“If it will help, I will talk to Caerwin tomorrow,” Athena said softly, snuggling into Cullen’s side.

“Thank you,” Curly whispered and kissed the top of her head… Athena was already asleep.

**

Athena was walking in the garden when Morrigan saw her, “The soon to be wed is being left alone for the moment?”

“I’m hiding,” Athena blushed as she ran her hand through the small fountain of water that could be found in the center of the garden.

“The wedding preparations are that bad?” Morrigan found it odd that Duchess would not be barreling toward her wedding with great excitement.

“No, I’m constantly being teased about my health because I’m eating and sleeping more,” Athena was still letting the water run through her fingers.

“Considering the amount of teasing you got for eating and sleeping less than what they wanted you to do… One would think they would be happy with this turn of events,” Morrigan offered.

“Thank you, that’s what I’ve been saying,” Athena sighed in frustration and decided to change the subject, “How are you and Kieran?”

“We are well. Kieran is enjoying getting to know Alistair. We may be traveling to Denerim…” Morrigan raised an eyebrow seeing Dorian walking toward Athena at a very quick pace.

“Are you well? Josephine is ready to send out a search party!” Sparkler caught up to them.

“Now would be a fine time for an invisibility spell,” Athena murmured to Morrigan.

Morrigan chuckled, and then said quite sternly to Dorian, “I did not realize that the Inquisitor was not allowed to walk in her gardens.”

“She is. However, she is also supposed to be meeting with the Ambassador about tomorrow,” Sparkler informed them.

“I'm fine. The last I heard was that Josie and Bull were going to have lunch together and we were to meet after that…” Athena was decidedly irritated.

“According to Josephine that changed,” Dorian said.

“No one informed me of the change,” Duchess argued.

“No one has been able to find you since breakfast. Are you sure you're well?" His worry at not being able to find Athena was obvious.

Morrigan’s eyes widened and burned with anger on her friend’s behalf, “The Inquisitor does not need to answer to anyone save herself, and to change a meeting both parties need to agree. The Inquisitor is everything to everyone, and those that are to care for her seem to be forgetting that she is human and may need a break now and then from incessant and inane teasing about sleep patterns and eating habits, among many other things. I realize you are family to her, but family should provide a soft place to land instead of hunt her down like some misfit child.”

Sparkler smirked, “I agree. I’ll tell Josephine that you had a meeting already planned.” And beat a hasty retreat.

Athena looked at Morrigan, “Thank you.”

“You are welcome. I am left to wonder why the Commander has not said anything on your behalf?” Morrigan was itching to tear into more people now.

“We’ve been working opposite schedules lately, and he’s concerned too,” Athena said softly.

“Maybe I should talk to him as well,” Morrigan sighed, irritated again.

“I said he was concerned… Cullen is not treating me like a misfit child,” Athena chuckled and then grew serious. “I was going to talk to Caerwin to allay Cullen's concerns, but I’m concerned as well, no matter how much sleep I get I seem to be always tired.”

“When did this start?” 

“Right after we left Halamshiral, and it seems to be only getting worse,” Duchess answered quietly, unafraid to let Morrigan see that she was concerned.

“Do you think it’s because of the loss of your arm?”

“No, the surgeons there said that I was fully healed weeks before we left. And even right after the surgery, so long as I got a decent night’s sleep I did not need to take naps.”

Morrigan was quiet for a while, sifting through her thoughts, “Mayhap you should speak to this Caerwin. She is a healer?”

“She is…” Athena paused and fidgeted uncomfortably, “She’s a midwife as well….”

Morrigan waited for Athena to continue. When she didn’t Morrigan asked, “Are you thinking that you are with child again?” Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears and nodded. Morrigan waited patiently for Duchess’ eyes to open, and offered, “Then we shall go see this Caerwin together.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Think of it as a thank you for not getting upset with me for getting irritated with your cousin,” Morrigan smiled.

“Why would I get upset with you for saying what I was thinking?” Athena was confused.

Morrigan laughed, delighting in Duchess’ honesty, “let’s go.”

They went to talk to Caerwin, and she confirmed Athena’s suspicion that she was indeed pregnant again. Athena and Morrigan walked to Duchess’ quarters in silence. Once there Morrigan smiled a little, “ ‘Tis a beautiful view.”

“You can see the sun rise over the mountains in the morning,” Athena responded with no emotion in her voice as she walked out on to the balcony.

“Athena,” Morrigan walked out on to the balcony with her, “you should take the rest of the day and spend it with Cullen.”

“I wish I could.”

“You leave that to me,” Morrigan paused before she left and placed a hand on Athena’s shoulder, “‘Tis the right time.” 

Morrigan went through the main hall and ran in to Ruffles, who asked, “Where is the Inquisitor?”

“Taking a well deserved break,” Morrigan had an edge of ice to her voice.

“She cannot! Tomorrow is her wedding!” Ruffles exclaimed in frustration.

“Precisely! It is her and the Commander’s wedding, no one else’s. You have all been pulling her in so many directions that she doesn’t know which way is up anymore. She looks to her friends to treat her as a human being, not some mythical creature out of legend or a demon that can constantly fight without needing rest. 

"The Commander and the Inquisitor will wed on the morrow, no matter who is or isn’t here. If the dress fits or not. If the food is edible or not. They love each other and that is why they are marrying. Today is the last day before they embark on a new journey, and they are spending it apart… Just like they did during the war and yet through their efforts the war has stopped, the sky has been healed, and Corypheus is locked in the fade. 

"This happy occasion, where they get to celebrate their love is being treated as a war effort instead of two people pledging their lives to one another. How does any of that say they’re human beings? Let them have the rest of the day.” Morrigan paused for anyone to gainsay her, when they didn’t she continued.

“I am going to go inform the Commander that his love is waiting for him. I will put a barrier on the Inquisitor’s door to keep people out.” Morrigan warned as she left, leaving the hall in stunned silence.

She walked to Curly’s office and waited for the meeting he was having to end. Once Cullen had seen everyone out he asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Why does something have to be wrong?” She raised an eyebrow, wondering why he was being so suspicious.

“Because you don’t come to my office. Where’s Athena?”

“In her quarters,” Morrigan answered cryptically.

“Is she all right?” The worry in Cullen’s voice spoke volumes.

“She is the picture of health,” Morrigan smiled. She was getting great enjoyment out of toying with poor Curly.

“Then why are you here?” Cullen was quickly losing his patience.

“Because Athena would like to spend the rest of the day with you.”

“You’re not giving me a lot to go on, Morrigan,” Curly grumbled, “why wouldn’t she come to me herself?”

“All will be explained to you when you go to Athena,” Morrigan patronized him.

Cullen shook his head at her and left to be with Athena. She had not moved since Morrigan had left. Cullen walked up to her and quietly said, “Athena?” Duchess jumped sky high and quickly wiped her tears away. Cullen looked in to her violet eyes, “Morrigan said that you were healthy.”

“I am,” Athena took a very deep and long breath, “I went to see Caerwin today… She said that the reason I have been eating and sleeping more is because I’m with child again.”

“You don’t seem happy about it,” Cullen remarked quietly. He couldn’t help but wonder what was running through her head.

“I am…” Athena paused and looked out at the mountains, “I’m also terrified... I don’t think I could bear it if… I lost…” Athena couldn’t go on, her voice choked with tears.

Cullen pulled her into the safety and warmth of his arms, shushing her and holding her as she cried. When the sobbing slowed to hiccups, Cullen pulled her inside and they sat on the couch, he held her hand and waited until her violet eyes looked in to his, “Athena, I love you, and nothing is going to change that. Should the… worst happen, we’ll keep trying if that is your wish.”

Athena closed her eyes against a fresh threat of tears. When she opened them, she whispered, “I don’t want to tell anyone except maybe my father and Mia until we’re past the three month mark.”

“Why?” 

“There’s less of a chance that I could lose the baby after that,” Athena almost whispered. She felt that if she talked about it too loud, this pregnancy would disappear too.

“Morrigan knows?”

“She went with me to see Caerwin. She also laid in to Dorian pretty hard about the constant teasing of the change in my eating, sleeping habits, and the constant meetings,” Athena answered.

“Did the teasing bother you that much?” Cullen was worried because he had joined in on the teasing, trusting that Athena would tell him if it bothered her.

“Not initially. This morning it became a bit much, and I was expected to be in meetings all day without so much as a by your leave. So, after breakfast I hid where no one would think to look for me. I’m surprised they didn’t ask you…” Athena softly explained.

“How did it become a bit much?” Cullen’s voice was reserved, cautious, hoping that it was something that Athena had possibly overreacted to… Even though she wasn’t really given to overreactions.

“Cullen, it’s not important, and I’m sure Varric has already taken care of it,” Athena evaded, knowing that his reaction would be one of outrage.

“Yes, it is important. And why would Varric be taking care of it?” Cullen’s voice raised slightly, all hope gone of him chalking it up to stress or the like.

“Because he was even more upset about it than I was. I truly believe it was meant to be funny and to join in the teasing,” Athena paused, all too familiar with Curly’s guarded look, “the only way I’m telling you is if you promise to let Varric handle it.”

Cullen sighed, slightly irritated, “I promise.”

“One of the servants thought it would be funny to say that he wasn’t going to serve me breakfast… And before I could respond, my eyes filled up with tears,” She said almost shyly. She was blushing because tearing up over something so simple as a jest was ridiculous to her.

Cullen exploded out of his seat and started pacing, “How dare they! You are the Inquisitor, the Herald of Andraste, and pregnant! And the servants think it’s funny to not serve you breakfast?!”

Athena closed her eyes and sighed, when she opened them she informed him, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you. I was served breakfast. The servants see me being teased daily about eating or not eating, and because they’re servants they aren’t allowed to tease me? Does that seem fair to you? Your soldiers tease you all the time.”

“That’s different,” Cullen grumbled, still pacing but calming down.

“Why is it different?” She was genuinely surprised that that was Cullen’s answer.

“Because we spend most of the day together and I don’t go into battle with servants,” Cullen was still angry on Duchess’ behalf.

“And we don’t spend most of the day with those cleaning our rooms, preparing and serving our food? They are to be seen and not heard from and sometimes not even seen. We shouldn’t forget that they’re people,” Athena argued.

“They aren’t your friends and family,” Cullen had calmed down enough to see reason and sat beside her again.

“My friends and family could be a little less merciless with the teasing. Especially when all I’ve heard for years was that they wanted me to eat and sleep more,” Duchess briefly looked away to fight back tears. “Right now only you, Morrigan, and Caerwin know that I’m with child. I would like it to stay that way, as much as it’s possible.”

Cullen kissed her, “Did Caerwin say how far along you are?”

“About seven weeks.”

Cullen's eyes grew wide at her answer as he quickly did the math, “Our wedding night?”

Athena shrugged, “Possibly,” and then she asked a bit nervously as she had yet to receive a response, “Are you all right with keeping this news to ourselves for a while?”

Cullen smiled at her and cupped her cheek with his hand, “If that is what you want to do, I am fine with it.”

Athena threw her arm around his neck and squeezed in relief, “Thank you.”

“I love you, Athena,” Cullen whispered as he wrapped his arms around her waist and slid down on the couch so that she was on top of him. He kissed her then, with a gentle passion that got his point across perfectly.

“I love you, too,” she whispered as they slowly undressed each other in between kisses.

Undressed, Cullen kissed a line from her lips to her belly where their child was safe, deep within her, and holding onto her hips he gently guided her to where they could both make the most of their passions. After those passions were sated, Athena collapsed on him causing him to chuckle.

“Athena?” Cullen asked with his arms still wrapped around her to prevent her from falling.

“Hmmm?” She was half asleep.

“Why don’t we move to the bed?” Cullen shifted out from underneath her so he could carry her, not really expecting an answer.

“I’m hungry,” Athena responded. Curly’s shifting brought her from half asleep to fully awake.

Cullen laughed, “I don’t think I’ve ever heard those two words from you.”

“Hopefully you’ll be hearing them a lot more often and for several months to come,” Athena wrapped her arm around his neck.

“I would love that,” he said quietly as he put her on the bed, “I’m going to go find us some food.”

“But I don’t want you to leave,” Athena stretched languidly on the sofa.

“You’re hungry. I’m going to make sure you get fed,” he returned to kiss her, unable to resist the fetching picture she made.

“I can’t tempt you with something else?” Athena inquired seductively, refusing to release Curly.

“Not until after we eat,” Cullen gently removed her hand from the back of his neck, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He quickly threw on pants and a shirt. As he opened the door to leave Curly saw Ruffles ready to knock, “Josephine?”

“I wanted to see how Athena was doing. I heard that she and Morrigan went to see Caerwin,” Josephine admitted, a bit nervously.

“Athena’s fine. In fact, I was just going to see about getting dinner for the two of us,” Cullen ushered Ruffles out of the doorway and had her walk down to the main hall with him.

“I can have someone send dinner up to you,” Josephine offered.

“I don’t think that would be a good idea tonight,” Cullen opened the door to the main hall.

“You heard about the servant this morning?” Josephine asked, a slight blush stealing in to her cheeks.

“I did,” he grabbed two plates and started filling them.

“And you aren’t upset?” Josephine was surprised that Curly was so calm. She had expected him to be berating every servant that passed him.

“I was… I still am, but Athena made some very valid points. We haven’t really had much time to spend with each other since we got back from Halamshiral. It would be nice for it to be just the two of us tonight,” Cullen answered.

“As you wish, Commander. Everything is ready for the morrow,” Ruffles informed him.

“Thank you, Josephine,” Curly disappeared into Athena’s quarters. He walked up the stairs and put the plates on the table and softly called out, “Athena?”   
He didn’t receive a response so he walked over to the bed and saw that her hair was in her face. Cullen smiled to himself and pulled back the curtain of her hair to reveal her sleeping face. He whispered as he sat down beside her, “I would much rather you fall asleep on me than be ill.”

Athena shifted and reached out. Cullen took her hand and smiled as he saw her violet eyes open to look into his brown ones, “I’m sorry,” her voice cracked with sleep.

Cullen gently shook his head at her, “You never need to apologize for sleeping. Are you still hungry?”

In answer to his question Duchess’ stomach growled causing both of them to chuckle. Athena sat up to get out of bed. Once they were both standing, Cullen pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Athena’s stomach growled again and laughing softly he released her. 

They both sat down to eat and he asked, “Did you eat lunch today?”

Athena blushed, “No, I didn’t feel like going back into the main hall.”

“You could have went to the tavern,” Cullen suggested.

“You mean where Bull, Cole, and the Chargers stay?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him, wondering why he had a death wish for her.

“You really did want to hide today, didn’t you?” Athena nodded in response, blushing even more. 

Cullen took hold of her free hand, “Athena, if you’re hungry I want you to eat,” he held up a hand to prevent her from speaking, “I’m not saying it just because you are with child. You being hungry is a far too infrequent of a thing… and come get me the next time you feel like you have to hide.”

“My desiring food doesn’t seem to be an infrequent thing anymore, and I’m still surprised that no one told you that Josephine was looking for me,” Athena took a bite of her food after she finished speaking.

Cullen shrugged. He wondered about it too, but he was glad that he didn’t know, because he would have torn Skyhold apart stone by stone and with his bare hands to find her, “I don’t know, but you should know by now that you can interrupt me from work at any time.”

Athena blushed at the gentle chastisement, “I didn’t want to hear anything that I shouldn’t hear…” 

“What do you mean?” Curly asked, confused.

“You still haven’t told me where we’re going…” Duchess smiled at him.

“I didn’t think…” Cullen paused and briefly closed his eyes, the sudden realization that Athena may not want to travel or be well enough to travel now that she was with child. When he opened them again he sighed, “Do you still want to go?”

“Yes, I still want to go. It’s the only way to be sure that we won’t be interrupted for a couple days,” the tone of her voice was absolutely certain and quite excited to be away for a few days.

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief, “Good, and you will find out when we get there. As for today the meetings were about the Inquisition… Peace keeping soldiers and what they’re going to do while we aren’t here.”

“How long are we going to be gone?” Athena pushed her empty plate away and slightly leaned back in her chair. She was thankful to discuss something normal.

“At least a week,” Cullen answered and asked seeing the empty plate, “Do you want more?”

She chuckled, “No. Can I at least get a hint as to where we are going?”

“It’s in Fereldan,” Curly winked at her.

“Keeping a pregnant woman in the dark... How dare you?” Athena teased, smiling.

Cullen got up from sitting across from her, pulled her to a standing position, and sultrily said as he lifted her in his arms, “I’ll do more than tease.” 

Athena chuckled softly and kissed him. They spent most of the night making love.


	43. Chapter 43

The day dawned bright and early with Ruffles pounding on Athena’s door. Cullen awoke with a start, and Athena groaned, “This is not how I wanted to wake up today.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “Do you ever get the feeling that Josephine is more excited about this than we are?”

“Only hourly,” Athena quipped and Curly laughed.

And then they heard, muffled because of the door, “Inquisitor, are you well? Are you awake? We need to get you dressed.”

“If she puts me in that dress now, I’ll be standing in front of you naked,” Athena murmured softly, still in bed as she enjoyed watching Cullen get dressed. 

Her comment stopped him cold and he looked at her, “As much as I would love that… The day would end in bloodshed.”

Athena laughed as she finally got out of bed, but she was in no rush to get dressed. She came over and kissed him, pressing her body tight against his almost clad one. Cullen groaned, “Woman, what are you doing to me?”

“I told you that wasn’t how I wanted to wake up,” Athena said sensually, walking around the room righting things.

Curly (poor man) stared at her for a while. Athena noticed and smiled a ‘come hither’ smile, Cullen forcefully closed his eyes and ordered, “You need to put on a robe, blanket, something… Or we won’t be leaving this room and we won’t be getting married again today.”

Athena gave a throaty chuckle and after a couple minutes she told Cullen, “You can open your eyes now.”

He opened them to see her in the shirt he had to wear. He shook his head at her, “That’s not better.”

“You told me that I had to put on something,” Athena laughingly teased.

“So, I’m supposed to stand naked in front of you when we get married?” Cullen was trying to be stern, but secretly enjoyed how light hearted Duchess was acting. It was a far too infrequent of a thing.

“Is that an option?” Duchess smiled wickedly.

“No! Give me my shirt!” Cullen blushed (and just like that she turned the tables on him.)

Athena slowly, torturously, took his shirt off. While holding it on a single fingertip she challenged, “Come get it.”

Cullen walked across the room to her, took his shirt back. After he put it on he pulled Athena hard against him, kissing her with barely bridled passion, until he felt her melt in to him. And then he walked away to get the door with a warning, “You will pay for your teasing later.”

“Promise?” Athena asked hopefully as she wrapped herself in a blanket and perched on the corner of the bed.

Cullen opened the door laughing. Josephine was not amused to be kept waiting, nor was she happy to see Curly, “What are you doing here?!”

“I was sleeping with my wife until you knocked on the door,” Cullen answered.

“You can’t be here!” Ruffles exclaimed.

“Why not?” Cullen asked as they made their way up the stairs.

“Because it’s not done, and it’s bad luck,” Josephine explained.

Cullen and Athena looked at each other. Athena chuckled softly, “Josie, if I did things because it’s how they’ve always been done, I’d still be in Ostwick’s circle and I’ve overcome a fair share of bad luck. Besides, we’re already married…”

“True. Can we at least keep the dress a secret?” Josephine blushed profusely as she had forgotten that they had eloped.

“Yes,” Athena chuckled, and then grew serious, “I’m sorry for yesterday.”

“No, Morrigan was right. We have been treating you horribly lately and I shouldn’t have teased you at breakfast yesterday,” Ruffles hugged Duchess.

“I don’t remember you teasing me…” Athena trailed off, confused.

“The servant teasing you was my jest,” Josephine admitted, very embarrassed. 

Cullen raised an eyebrow and was about to lay into Ruffles when he saw Athena shaking her head at him. Athena said, “It’s all right, Josie. I don’t know why the teasing got to me yesterday.”

As the ladies parted from their hug, Curly asked, “Breakfast?”

Athena nodded and adjusted her blanket. Curly noticed and smirked. Ruffles however, exclaimed, “There’s no time! Athena has to get her hair done, make-up, and dressed.”

“Absolutely not. I’d rather not have my face be itchy on my re-wedding day,” Athena said in response to having make-up applied.

Cullen went to open the door for the servants to bring in food as he came back up and directed the servants as to where to put breakfast, he admitted, “I want to be able to kiss my wife.”

Athena chuckled in response to Cullen as Josephine pushed, “We don’t have to put on a lot. And why is there food here?”

“My answer is still no and because it’s time to eat breakfast,” Athena sat down to eat.

“You need to get your hair done! How do you propose to do that and eat?” Ruffles started pacing.

“I don’t. I’m going to eat first, and I’ve told you repeatedly that if Morrigan and I can’t get my hair up with the assistance of magic there aren’t enough hair ties or products that will get my hair to listen,” Duchess reminded her before taking a bite of her food.

“You used magic on your hair?” Cullen sat down across from Athena, wondering why she would want to change her hair.

“Morrigan and I got bored one night while we were in the Basin and we enchanted some vines and Varric and Dorian’s styling stuff to see if we could get my hair to stay up for longer than five minutes… It didn’t work.” Athena chuckled softly at the memory.

“I’m still going to try,” Ruffles grumbled and sat with them, half heartedly eating a chocolate chip cookie.

As they finished breakfast, people came in and out carrying and removing stuff, they heard Leliana and Morrigan yelling at somebody. From Morrigan, “Fool woman.”

“Who are you?” Leliana asked.

Cullen growled low in his throat, causing Athena to chuckle and ask hopefully, “Early wedding present?”

“Athena, you stay where you are,” Josephine motioned for the servants to start brushing Duchess’ hair. She went down to see what was going on.

Cullen walked over to Athena and kissed her, “The next time I’ll see you, you will be in your wedding dress…”

“You’re leaving me?” Athena was nervous with all the preening being done to her.

“Morrigan will protect you,” Cullen softly reassured her and kissed her again. Then he whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena whispered back.

Cullen smiled at her, “I’ll see you soon.”

As he went down the stairs he heard Athena say, “Do you really have to pull so hard?”

Cullen looked at Morrigan as they passed each other, “Protect her?”

Morrigan nodded, “Are they trying to do her hair?”

“They are, and I would like her to have some hair left.”

Morrigan chuckled as she went up the stairs and said, “I have it on orders from the Commander that if one hair is harmed on the Inquisitor I am to turn you into a toad.”

Athena chuckled and said to reassure the servant who suddenly went pale, “She’s teasing.”

Morrigan raised an eyebrow at Athena, “Am I?”

Cullen met up with Leliana and Josephine who was helping a woman stand, “Who’s this?”

“She says she knows the Inquisitor,” Josephine informed him. Leliana shook her head, not recognizing the lady.

“From where?” Cullen asked.

“I don’t really know her,” the woman replied. She was older, had gray hair, and looked more petite than Duchess, “I am a friend of her mother’s and Evelyn is in grave danger.”

“Why is she here?” Cullen refused to acknowledge the trespasser and directed his question to Nightingale.

“She hid among the servants coming in and out of the Inquisitor’s chambers until she was almost pushed over the railing. That is how Morrigan and I found her,” Leliana explained.

“You won’t be seeing the Inquisitor this day,” Cullen growled, finally deigning to talk to the woman.

“When will I be seeing her?” The lady was too desperate to notice the menace vibrating off of Cullen.

“The Inquisitor has prior obligations for the next several weeks, but tomorrow I will send one of my agents to speak with you,” Leliana took her away.

Cullen sighed wearily. Josephine looked at him sympathetically, “Let Leliana deal with her. You have to get ready as well.”

Cullen nodded in response and went to finish getting ready.

**

Athena stared at reflection, fully dressed in a beautiful violet gown that matched the veil her father had given her. Said veil was covering her brunette hair, which was flowing down her back. The hairdressers gave up after two hours of trying to get Athena’s hair off of her neck. 

Morrigan smiled, “‘Tis a good thing you and the Commander are to be wed today, especially after he sees you.”

“The ring!” Athena ran over to her desk.

“You put your ring in your desk?” Josephine was shocked as the only time she saw it removed was when Athena had given it to Cullen for safe keeping because of the anchor trying to claim her life.

Athena opened a locked desk drawer and pulled out a ring that was a thicker version of hers, “This is for him.”

“How did you get it made? Will it fit?” Ruffles questioned.

“The more important question is, will he wear it?” Morrigan wondered.

“It belonged to his father, and as for sizing, it’s not that hard when he’s in a deep sleep,” Athena smiled at Morrigan, “and I think he will wear it.”

Josephine smiled at Duchess, “It’s time.” 

Morrigan and Ruffles left ahead of Athena, who took a last look in the mirror, smiled and left the bedroom with her gift in the palm of her hand. Arthur was waiting for her on the stairs between the bedroom and the main hall. He gasped when he saw her, “You look stunning.”

“Thank you,” Athena blushed. Arthur held out his arm for her to take and they walked down the stairs. 

Athena paused for a moment before they opened the door, “Father, there’s something I need to tell you.”

“Are you sure now is the time?” Arthur worried that his daughter was going to tell him that she changed her mind.

“No, but I think you deserve to know,” Athena took a deep breath and then said in a rush, “I’m with child again and only Cullen and Morrigan know. I don’t want anyone else to know in case…”

“Thank you for telling me, and I will not share your news until you or your husband tell me to,” Arthur hugged her, “Are you ready?”

Athena’s smile rivaled the sun as she nodded and said quietly, “I am.”

**

Cullen stood on the dais facing the door that Athena would be coming out of and he had the look of a man that wanted to be pacing... especially after Josephine and Morrigan came down without Athena and took their seats without even looking at him. Morrigan sat in between Selene and Leliana. Leliana whispered, “If the Inquisitor is not out here in the next five minutes, the Commander may just go and get her.”

Morrigan chuckled, “I doubt anything could stop the Inquisitor from coming out of that door. The Commander is a good man. Seeing how in love they are, maybe love isn’t as foolish as I once thought.”

“You saw that Selene and I were and are in love. Why didn’t your opinion change then?” Alistair questioned in a hushed tone.

“Because you annoy me,” Morrigan griped, “Now hush.”

The door to Athena’s quarters opened and out Athena walked with Arthur handing her over to Cullen. They smiled at each other as Cullen took the hand that Arthur had just released and the wedding ceremony began. Cullen promised the he would care for her in sickness and in health, protect her from anything he possibly could, and that he would love her until the end of his days and to the Beyond. 

Athena promised the same except for the change of one tiny word from do to will. They exchanged rings. Cullen had to place hers on her right hand as Athena had lost the left. When Athena produced one for him, Cullen was very surprised that he was getting one. When Duchess went to put it on his left hand he gently shook his head at her and mouthed that she should place it on his right.

Athena smiled at him with tears in her eyes. He was even more surprised that it fit, eliciting a “How?” From him. 

Athena smiled in answer and whispered, “Later.”

Mother Giselle blessed the union and told them to walk in the Maker’s grace. Athena and Cullen kissed and a roar went up from the crowd. Of course, they blushed. When they were done kissing Cullen held Athena’s hand high in the air as they turned to face their guests. They walked down the aisle until they reached the door that led to Josephine’s office and turned to go down the stairs.

We arrived in a large stone room with heavy tapestries, ancient paintings, and carved stone pillars supporting the ceiling. The room also had stone dwarven statues in it. As our lovers stood at the bottom of the stairs to accept the well wishes of their guests, Cullen asked, “How did you get my father’s ring?”

“You should be asking who, my love,” Athena smiled up at him.

“Mia,” Cullen chuckled softly, “How did you get it to fit?”

“There are times where you can be a very sound sleeper,” Duchess blushed.

He kissed her and with their lips a mere breath apart, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she said as I came over.

“It’s about time something normal happened for you two,” I quipped.

“Is getting married normal?” Athena asked with a light in her eyes that said she was the happiest woman in Thedas, if not the world.

“Very,” I chuckled and left them to get back to greeting their guests.

Once the last guest greeted the newly married couple, Duchess and Curly were finally allowed to sit down. As they sat they over heard Leliana say to Josephine, “Selene looks pale.”

Athena looked at Cullen and whispered, “Maybe we should leave tonight.”

He chuckled softly, “The only place we’re going after this is your,” he paused, “…our quarters.”

Athena laughed, “It’s about time you claimed them as well.”

Their conversation was interrupted by Sparkler starting to clink his glass with a fork to get them to kiss. Athena looked at him like he had taken leave of his senses. Only to have him pucker up and kiss the air. She laughed helplessly, “He’s finally lost it.”

Cullen griped, “He never had it.”

Athena laughed at him as everyone started clinking their glasses. Ruffles explained, “You two are supposed to kiss.”

“If we kiss now, they’ll be doing this every five minutes or less,” Cullen predicted.

“I doubt they’re going to stop until we do,” Athena blushed as the clinking got louder. They kissed and another roar went up from the crowd causing both of them to blush. Our wed lovers were toasted and roasted by me and Dorian. The heartfelt toast came from Arthur, “I’ve made many mistakes that I deeply regret. But to be allowed to get to know my daughter after such a long time, when she could have just as easily turned me away. I will always be grateful. And then to see her in love and have that love returned to her, it is a beautiful thing to see.”

When Arthur sat down beside Dorian, the servants brought out the food. We ate and drank merrily with, as Curly predicted, every five minutes a clinking of the glasses could be heard (usually started by Sparkler or myself,) and our lovers would have to kiss. Athena barely touched her food which didn’t go unnoticed by Cullen, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine,” she kissed him and a roar went up through the crowd, (getting those two to blush is so much fun,) “Chocolate chip cookies found their way to me after you left… I couldn’t stop eating them.”

Cullen laughed softly, “I’m sure that went over well.”

Athena chuckled, “Every time I reached for one Josie would sigh, she was afraid that I would get crumbs on my dress. Did you send them?” 

“No, I’m sorry to say that I didn’t think of it,” Cullen answered honestly.

“I wonder who did,” Athena mused softly.

Cullen only had one guess, “I know Mia’s been after the kitchen staff. They weren’t making the cookies right.”

The cake came out and it was cut by our happy couple. Sparkler and I encouraged Duchess to shove the cake in Curly’s face. She responded, “No, the shirt he’s wearing is too comfortable to be ruined.”

Cullen blushed bright red and growled, “Wife.”

Athena smiled wickedly at him, “Husband.”

“Maker’s breath,” was heard, quite loudly from Ruffles.

Cullen gently put the cake in Athena’s mouth which Selene commented on, “As gentle as he’s being with her, you would almost think she was with child.”

Sparkler and I looked at each other with widened eyes. “Shit,” I said.

“She would tell us,” Dorian was certain that his cousin would trust him enough with that information.

“It’s a question for another day,” Arthur warned us off.

Athena wasn’t as gentle as Cullen. Granted, that could be because he pulled her tight against him at the exact moment she was getting ready to feed the cake to him. Cullen came away with frosting on his nose. Cullen teased, “Your aim is off.”

“You made me lose my balance,” she took a single finger and wiped the frosting off of his nose and licked it, slowly, off of her finger. The glasses started clinking before Curly could respond. He kissed her hard and passionately. 

As the kiss ended the musicians started playing. Cullen asked, “Would you like to dance, my lady?”

“I would love to,” Athena said quietly, smiling at him.

As they twirled slowly around the dance floor (at the moment it was just them. First official dance as husband and wife.) Cullen asked, “Are you having a good time?”

“I am. Are you?”

“I’m married to the kindest and most beautiful woman in all of Thedas… of course I’m having a good time,” Cullen pulled her a little closer as she blushed profusely.

“I don’t know if your admirers from Halamshiral would agree with you,” Athena teased.

“Wife,” Cullen warned. She laughed, lightly, beautifully, with her head tossed back. It was incredibly evident that she was ecstatically happy and floating on air.

Athena danced with her father and cousin while Cullen danced with his sister. When our lovers were able to get back together, Duchess yawned. Curly asked, “Tired?”

“Getting there, but I don’t want this night to end,” Athena smiled at him.

“It doesn’t have to end just because we leave….I have other things in mind,” Cullen said seductively.

Athena’s violet eyes lit up with a flame of desire to join the light that was happiness, and breathlessly requested, “Let’s go.”

They practically ran through Skyhold until they reached the door to Athe—(excuse me) their chambers. Cullen stopped and because they were holding hands Athena had to stop with him. 

Athena asked, “Cullen?” In answer he picked her up and carried her to their bed where they made love for the first time as husband and wife, officially.

**

Cullen had wakened with the sunrise because of his dreams again. Athena was sound asleep with her head on his chest and her arm draped across him. He took her hand that was resting on his shoulder and gently kissed it and said softly as he felt Athena waking, “Good morning, wife.”

Athena smiled with her eyes still closed and whispered, “Good morning, husband.” When she opened them, she placed her chin in the middle of his chest and gazed at him for a while.

Cullen endured her loving gaze patiently and finally asked, “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking about how much I love you,” Athena moved to straddle his waist and bent down to kiss him.

“Is that all?” Cullen inquired seductively, raising an eyebrow as he placed his hands on her hips.

Athena smiled sultrily at him and shifted against him. Cullen groaned, and reached up to pull her down to him and kissed her hard. As the sun continued its ascent over the mountains, our wedded lovers’ passions rose with the sun.

“That was how I wanted to wake up yesterday,” Athena remarked huskily after they finished making love.

Cullen chuckled, “We do need to get up if we want to leave Skyhold.” 

Athena practically jumped out of bed and got dressed before Cullen could get out of bed… Mainly because he was laughing too hard, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that excited to leave.”

“That’s because until now I haven’t been promised a week alone with you,” Athena smiled at him as she started packing a satchel.

“Josephine already packed for you,” Cullen let her know as he got dressed.

“How many trunks?” Athena groaned, dreading his answer.

“One,” Cullen chuckled, understanding her groan.

“For both of us?” She was beginning to hope. She also wondered how Curly convinced Ruffles to not pack her entire wardrobe.

“Yes. We’re not going to be gone that long.”

Athena emptied out most of the clothing that she had put in her satchel but still intended to bring it. Cullen noticed, “Why are you bringing that?”

“Because it has some herbs in it that I hopefully won’t need,” Athena blushed slightly.

It took Curly a second to realize what she was talking about, “That drink you told me about?”

“Similar… Morrigan knew of these herbs. She said that they’re not like what was made at Ostwick,” she explained.

“How…? You just found out two days ago…” Cullen trailed off, very confused as to how Morrigan would be able to grow something in two days.

“Selene’s been having a rough time with morning sickness since coming to Skyhold. Morrigan had given them to her to use and then she gave me some yesterday morning,” Duchess responded as they took each other’s hands and started walking down the stairs.

They paused at the railing where the woman almost fell. Cullen said to remind himself, “Before we leave, I want to get workers here to put in a floor instead of leaving a gaping hole.”

“Does that mean you’ll move your office here?” 

“I don’t know,” he paused as he opened the door to the main hall for her, “we’ll see.”

When they entered the main hall applause erupted, (yes, they blushed.) They came over to sit with Sparkler, Darius, and I. I was loud enough for the entire hall to hear me, “Here come the Trevelyans… Or is it the Rutherfords?”

Curly and Duchess looked at each other. Cullen was the first to speak, “We haven’t really talked about it.”

“I don’t mind changing my name,” Athena smiled.

“I don’t know if you would be able to, Duchess,” I teased.

“Why wouldn’t I be able to?” 

“Athena Trevelyan, Herald of Andraste, Inquisitor…” Dorian reminded her.

“Most people have no idea what my name is. I highly doubt that it would matter,” Athena took a bite of her food.

“I doubt anyone would stand in her way, Dorian,” Darius backed up Athena.

“Probably not,” Dorian agreed. He also noticed that Duchess had cleaned her plate again, “Is there something you aren’t telling us, Athena?”

“Leave her alone,” Cullen warned softly.

“We are family now, Commander,” Sparkler griped.

“Why do you still call him Commander then?” Athena chuckled. Which had Dorian blushing.

“Because Curly told Sparkler that he had to win at chess everyday for six months, before Curly would allow Sparkler to call him by his given name,” I chuckled, exaggerating a bit.

“Oh please, he’s called me Athena from day two of meeting me. He also doesn’t listen to Cullen,” Athena smiled at her cousin.

“We were related then too… Just not as closely related,” Dorian was still blushing.

Cullen shook his head and asked Athena, “Are you ready?”

“I am. But, I thought you wanted to talk to someone first,” Athena reminded him as they stood.

“You’re right, I did,” and they disappeared into Josephine’s office without so much as a wave.

“I thought you two would have left already,” Ruffles spoke upon seeing them enter.

“While we’re gone would you mind having the workers close the gaping hole that leads up to Athena’s…” Cullen was interrupted.

“Our quarters,” Athena finished for him, with a teasing smile.

“They were supposed to do that while we were at Halamshiral. This time I will make certain it gets done,” Josephine answered.

“Thank you,” they said in unison.

“I hope you two have a good trip,” Ruffles wished them as they left. They didn’t say good bye to her either, which she found incredibly odd. So much so that she told Nightingale about it when she appeared five minutes later.

We all came out to send them off, which of course, had them blushing. They waved as they got into the carriage, stopping briefly to kiss first, and we applauded. Darius said, “I thought the Commander hated the carriage.” Morrigan, Arthur, and Mia smiled knowingly as they turned to walk away after the carriage left.

Safely ensconced in the carriage and away from our prying ears, Athena finally confessed, “I told my father about being with child yesterday.”

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief, “Mia asked after you as well.”

“I don’t want to lie to anyone…” Athena trailed off, blushing.

“Athena, it’s fine that you want to keep this quiet. I think it’s nice to have something that can stay private,” Cullen took hold of her hand.

“Here’s hoping we’ll continue to have a reason to tell everyone,” Athena said quietly, afraid if she spoke too loudly she would miscarry again.

Cullen kissed her in agreement and then questioned, “Is there a specific reason you don’t want everyone to know?”

“I’ll occasionally have people come up to me to offer sympathy or advice on what to do the next time I’m with child to prevent a miscarriage. It used to be constant. It hasn’t happened in a while, I would like it to stay that way,” Athena tried to not tear up.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Curly pulled her closer to him.

“Because they meant well,” she looked down at their entwined fingers, embarrassed that it hurt so much.

“That doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt you. And you are my primary concern,” Cullen said softly as he gently lifted her chin so he could look in to her eyes, “I love you. You are my wife and I want you to trust me with the smallest things. Even if you think it may be silly.”

“Cullen, I do trust you. I just don’t see how complaining about every hurt benefits anyone,” Athena confessed.

“What do you mean?” He needed clarification.

“If I complained about every jab taken at me… Well intentioned or not, we would not have time for anything else,” Duchess searched his brown eyes for understanding.

“I understand.”

“Now will you tell me where we're going?” Duchess thought that since they were on their way, she could get Cullen to tell her. She was wrong.

“Not just yet,” Curly kissed her hard and passionately until she moaned with ecstasy and they made love.

**

When the carriage stopped Athena wobbled a little when she got out and looked pale. Cullen immediately noticed, “Are you all right?”

“The ride was a little bumpier than I expected,” Athena blushed.

“I’m sorry, we shouldn’t have-“ Cullen paused and blushed.

“It wasn’t that. The queasiness started about ten minutes ago and is already gone.”

They kissed and Curly whispered, “Good.”

“Where are we?” Athena had to ask because Cullen was standing in front of her and he refused to let her look around him.  
Stepping aside to let Duchess see, he said quietly, “Before Corypheus was defeated I had promised that I would bring you here for a week.”

Athena gasped and whispered, “The lake.”

Cullen smiled and pulled her into his arms to kiss her. They went to a cabin that sat close to the lake and unpacked. Athena looked at the rustic settings in awe, “No servants?”

“Josephine arranged for a baker to drop food off once a day. Other than that it should be just us,” Cullen replied.

“So it truly will be just us?” Athena was still having a hard time believing that they won’t be interrupted.

“That’s my intention.”

“Am I dreaming?” Athena wrapped her arm around his neck.

“If you are, than so am I,” Cullen picked her up and carried her to the bed so they could make love. 

At sunset they decided to go swimming in the lake. Every time Duchess would splash Curly he would chase her. When he caught her they would kiss, she would splash him, repeat.

Once they tired of their game they sat on the dock so Athena could dangle her feet in the water. Cullen sat behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Athena looked up at him and whispered, “Thank you.”

“For what?” 

“For this,” she moved one of his hands to her belly, “for loving me, for this week, for marrying me, for everything.”

“I’m the one that should be thanking you,” Cullen quietly spoke… once he could swallow past the lump in his throat. 

“Why?"

"Because of everything you said,” Cullen paused as he caressed her belly, “and for being willing to try again. I love you, Athena.”

“I love you, too,” she whispered as she laid her head back on his arm to watch the moon rise. With the moon shining down on them, Cullen kissed her and they walked slowly back to the cabin to make love. They fell in to a peaceful sleep while holding each other.

**

On the third day of their trip Athena woke before dawn and smiled as she looked at her peacefully sleeping husband. She wondered if she should go out and see the sunrise without Cullen. She highly doubted that he would like the idea, but she was loathe to wake him… So, she compromised and stood in the doorway of their cabin with her nightgown on, ready to greet the sun. As the sun broke over the horizon she felt his arms encircle her waist and she leaned back into the embrace. She whispered and smiled, “Good morning.”

“I woke to a vision of my wife standing in the doorway to watch the sun rise and thought, “it’s been a while since she’s been up this early. Maybe she would like to go to the lake?””

“I would love to, but don’t you have to get dressed?” Athena turned in his embrace to face him.

“You’re in a nightgown,” Cullen teased.

“And you’re naked,” Athena cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Sounds like a good reason to not go to the lake then,” Cullen swung her up into his arms and carried her back to bed.

“Cullen!” She exclaimed and then as he kissed every part of her while taking her nightgown off she whispered huskily, “Oh, Cullen.”

They, of course, made love. Went swimming, made love some more, and at sunset decided to walk around the lake. They were holding hands, stopping every few feet to kiss, when they saw a fennec family run across their path and Athena chuckled softly. Cullen teased, “No, we already have a bear that needs to go back to the Avaar.”

“And we have a dog… Aww, come on, they’re adorable,” Athena teased back.

“No,” Cullen sounded half serious.

Athena chuckled, “I saved a fennec once and tried to tame it. The taming part didn’t take.”

“When was this?” He asked as they slowly rounded the far end of the lake. 

“I had been at the circle for about three years and someone had left the fennec to die in the garden. I healed its wounds and tried to take care of it for a couple days, and then it bit me so I released it back into the wild.” 

“Was that before or after you got ill as a child?” Cullen was excellent at remembering things Duchess told him about her past.

“Before. Why?” Athena wondered why it mattered.

“Are you sure it wasn’t the fennec bite that made you sick?” He asked as they neared the cabin.

Athena thought for a while as they entered the cabin, “I did get sick fairly soon after that.”

“No one noticed that you were bit by a wild animal?” Curly was in disbelief.

“I didn’t tell anyone... I didn’t think it was important,” She replied as Cullen threw logs in the fireplace.

“You didn’t think it was important to let someone know you were bit by a wild animal?” He now wondered at how wise that decision had been, as he started a fire for them to enjoy.

“I loved animals and they never bit me,” Athena shrugged and refused to meet his gaze.

“You were embarrassed?” Cullen chuckled softly. He phrased it as a question, but it was more of a statement as he already noted a blush staining her cheeks.

“And afraid that I would get in to trouble,” Athena fully blushed. Cullen shook his head at her and put an arm around her shoulders.

She decided to turn the tables on him, as the dog he had found at the Winter Palace was rarely found not by his side, “Did you have any pets as a child?”

“No, Rosalie was able to convince my parents to get her a dog after I had left for the Templars. On my trips home I was the one to care for it.”

“Why didn’t Rosalie?” She snuggled in to his side, a peace stealing over that she had never felt before.

“She always said that she was too young to properly care for a dog. So, Mia took care of it most of the time, and when I was home it was Mia’s turn for a break.”

“How was she too young to care for a dog?” Athena was very confused.

“That is a question you would have to ask her as she was eight when she got the dog.”

“I don’t understand…”

Cullen chuckled softly, “Caring for animals doesn’t come naturally to everyone.”

“You were able to do it and I doubt how to care for animals is part of Templar training,” Athena moved so she could look at him.

“You’re right, it’s not,” he laughed, “But you have met Rosalie, and she hasn’t grown up that much.”

“That’s terrifying, Cullen,” she said with her eyes wide.

“I agree… But we’re not here to talk about our family,” he placed a hand underneath her heavy hair at her neck and bent down to kiss her, “We are here to forget about the world for a while and just be with each other.”

“I think we can manage that,” Athena smiled at him with desire lighting her violet eyes.

“Good,” he whispered as they laid down on the floor in front of the fire to make love.

**

Their idyllic week came to a close, and as their trunk was lashed to the carriage, Athena looked wistfully behind her, “Do we have to go?”

Cullen watched her for a moment before answering, “We need to make sure Skyhold is still standing. We also need to work on reducing the size of our forces. We’ll come back.”

“Before or after…” Athena trailed off because she didn’t know if the driver was listening and was afraid to hope that this pregnancy would last longer than the first one.

“What would you prefer?” He asked quietly after taking hold of her hand.

“I don’t know…” Athena paused and thought, “I guess it depends on how chaotic things get.”

“Just say the word,” Curly whispered as he helped her in to the carriage. Once our lovers were seated comfortably the driver pulled away… Destination: Skyhold

The carriage did have to stop once so Athena could keep down what she ate that day. When she said she was feeling better Cullen pulled her close to him and said lightly to hide his worry, “No more carriage rides for you.”

Athena chuckled softly, “I think I would fare better with a horse…” Athena turned pale as they hit a particularly large bump, where she would have flew off of the seat had it not been for Cullen holding her, followed by several smaller bumps that would probably rattle the best of us, much less a woman quickening with child.

Once they hit a smooth stretch of road Cullen suggested, “Why don’t you close your eyes and try to get some sleep?”

Athena didn’t argue, she curled into a ball at his side and promptly fell asleep. Curly smiled, lightly caressing her arm. He wondered what chaos would greet them when they returned. He also wondered if Athena was going to get as ill as the last time she was with child. He hoped that this time would be different and he dozed off thinking how nice it would be to be a father, his hand dropped to rest against Duchess’ still normal belly. 

The carriage stopped as they reached their destination. Cullen was the first to wake, he shook Athena gently, “We’re home.”

Athena groaned as she stretched, “Why does everything hurt?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “It isn’t easy to find a comfortable position in the carriage.”

Athena sat up, “You fell asleep too?”

“Sleep? No. Dozed? Yes,” Curly answered, “Ready?”

“No.”

Cullen kissed her before he opened the door and left the carriage, “Ready now?”

“If I have to be,” Athena took his offered hand as she walked down the couple steps of the carriage. And there was no one there to greet them… Our lovers looked around them in disbelief. Athena was the first to recover, “Quick, let’s hide.”

Cullen laughed, “I want to see if they’re working on putting a floor by the stairwell that leads to our quarters.”

Athena sighed dramatically, “Then can we hide?”

“We’ll see,” Cullen was still chuckling.

They made their way up to the keep, passing by where I usually can be found, Athena noticed that I was missing, “Varric’s not here.”

“Do you think he went back to Kirkwall?” Cullen asked.

“No, he would have told me,” Athena was getting worried.

“He’s probably at the tavern,” Cullen tried to assuage her worry.

“True,” Athena responded. They walked up to their quarters and saw a lovely and sturdy floor put in where Cullen had requested it. 

When they came back down to the main hall Nightingale and Ruffles were there to greet them. Our foursome walked in to the war room. Josephine spoke first, “Did you two have a good trip?”

“We did,” Cullen smiled at his wife.

“Good,” Leliana went on to inform them, “Kern and Bernard are missing from their cells. This information came from Evelyn’s “friend.” We have verified it. It also appears that Evelyn is missing as well.”

“How?” Cullen was irritated. They had just got back, and almost immediately the news was bad.

“We don’t know,” Leliana answered.

“Evelyn isn’t with them?” Athena hoped Evelyn was safely ensconced somewhere.

“Not that we know of.” Leliana said.

“Any ideas on when Bernard and Kern escaped?” Cullen wanted to draw the conversation back to what he viewed as the immediate threat. They could search for Evelyn later.

“According to my agents they escaped over a month ago,” Nightingale remarked.

“They could be anywhere,” Cullen released a frustrated sigh.

“Sounds as though we have our work cut out for us,” Athena said softly looking up at Cullen.

“That we do,” Cullen looked at her, trying to not show his worry.

“Is that everything?” Athena wanted to escape more than ever at the moment.

“A lot of elven servants have been disappearing all over Orlais,” Josephine informed them.

“Why do I get the feeling that this has to do with Solas?” Athena groaned.

“We can’t trace a link to him, but that is what I was thinking as well,” Leliana said with sympathy.

“If that’s everything, it sounds as though Athena and I need to get right to work,” Cullen took her hand and left the war room to head to their quarters.

They walked silently until they reached the balcony. Athena gave a small smile, “Being on the balcony isn’t part of working…”

“Until everyone knows that you’re with child… This is the only place I could think of where we wouldn’t be interrupted or over heard,” Cullen released her hand to caress her cheek.

“Which one worries you the most?” Athena asked as Curly started to pace.

“Most? I think they’re all equally dangerous. Kern tried to take you captive and wanted to marry you. Bernard is mad with power and wants you to be his daughter. And Solas wants to destroy the world…” Cullen paused and walked over to her, taking hold of her hand, “And now you’re with child. I was worried for you then… now…”

“You didn’t know me when Kern tried to make me his captive,” Athena tried to tease.

“Athena,” Cullen chastised in no mood to be teased.

“Cullen, I know. I’m scared too. But this is our life. We’ve fought impossible odds before and succeeded,” Athena tried to find the positive side of the bad news.

“You are always trying to find the positive side aren’t you?” Cullen gently pulled her into his arms and she nodded against his chest. He closed his eyes and said softly, “When you leave Skyhold, even if it is for five minutes, take someone with you.”

“Even if I’m coming to see you?” Athena asked for clarification.

“Even then. I will be coming with you on as many trips as I can,” he answered.

Athena pulled back from his embrace to look in his eyes and said, “Cullen… You can’t.”

“I can and I will.” He was adamant.

“If something were to happen to you-” Athena was interrupted.

“I have already come close to losing you more times than I care to count… Athena, you are pregnant with our child. You are the woman I love and would willingly lay down my life for. My living without you means very little.” Cullen said with a voice thick with emotion.

“I am nothing without you. The only thing that kept me fighting, gave me the will to keep fighting, was knowing that I was coming back to you. Our child, should it survive, needs a father, especially when that father is you. I refuse to live without you,” Athena choked back tears.

Cullen crushed her to him so she wouldn’t see his tears and said hoarsely, “Then we protect each other. Just like we did when we went after Samson and Brenna.”

Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears and a few fell. When she was calm again she asked, “Can we go back to the lake?”

Cullen chuckled softly, “I wish.” 

They left their quarters hand in hand. When they separated they kissed and reluctantly let go of each other. Cullen went to his office and Athena went to the tavern. Curly already had several guests waiting for him. He looked from his sister, to Darius, to Dorian, a couple of Nightingale’s agents, and a couple soldiers. He didn’t say a word until he stood behind his desk and started looking through papers, “You do realize we just got back an hour ago?”

“I’m here to visit my brother and new sister before I leave for home,” Mia smiled.

“I was going to let you know what we’ve done the last week,” Darius said after he dismissed the soldiers.

“I was avoiding Varric,” Sparkler blushed.

“Leliana wanted you to have these,” one of her agents handed over some papers and left.

Cullen swore as he glanced over the papers. Mia and Darius raised an eyebrow at each other while they waited for Cullen to speak, “Mia, we’ll meet for dinner. Darius it’s going to have to wait. I need to talk to Athena.”

“You were just with her for an entire week,” Dorian griped.

“What bet did you lose this time? And if I could take her back there, I would,” Cullen said irritably as he left, with Sparkler blushing and Darius chuckling softly.

Athena was making her way to the tavern when Morrigan caught up with her, “I didn’t think you were the tavern type.”

“I’m not. I’m looking for a friend,” Athena answered.

“Would it be possible for the search to be put off for a couple minutes? Caerwin wants to see you,” Morrigan informed her.

Athena sighed, “Have her go to my quarters. I’ll be there in ten minutes. Let Cullen know too, please?”

Morrigan nodded and left.

Athena continued on to the tavern, searching for me. She found me sitting by the bar, deep into several pints of ale. She sat beside me and shook her head at the barkeep before he could offer her a drink, “Varric?"

“Hi, Duchess. When I’m sober, I want every detail of your trip… For the book’s sake,” I responded.

“It’s a bit early for you to be drinking. What’s going on?” She asked.

“Nothing I can’t handle,” I was saved from more questioning by Curly.

“Inquisitor, we need to talk,” Cullen said as he approached us.

Athena stood, “I’ll be back, Varric.”

“I’ll be here, Duchess.” I assured her, not turning away from my drink.

They left holding hands, once they were on the stairwell to their quarters, Athena remembered, “Caerwin is most likely in there waiting for me.”

“Why?” Curly was surprised to her this.

“At a guess?” Athena saw Cullen nod in answer, “to see how the baby is doing.”

“You don’t want to know?” He gently pried as they started walking again.

“Not if it’s bad news,” Athena almost whispered. Cullen kissed her gently and opened the door. Athena put a protective hand on her belly.

Caerwin smiled when she saw them, “Inquisitor, Commander, how was your trip?”

“Wonderful,” Athena smiled up at Cullen.

“If it’s not too much trouble, I would like to make sure that the pregnancy is progressing as it should be?” Caerwin requested.

Athena nodded in assent and laid down on the bed. Caerwin did her thing and when she was finished she said, “Everything looks as it should be. Because of the miscarriage, I think you should be seen weekly.”

“I’ll do my best,” Athena sat up. Morrigan smiled ruefully as she escorted Caerwin from the room.

“You’ll do your best?” Cullen cocked an eyebrow at her, wondering why she was almost refusing to be looked at.

“We have to find Kern, Bernard, and make sure Evelyn is safe from them. Will it take a day, a week, a month?” Athena wondered.

“Caerwin isn’t the only midwife around. You also do not need to take part in a search party,” Cullen sat beside her.

“If I stay behind it would fall to Josephine or Bull to lead a search party… And right now, I don’t see either of them desiring to do that. You had said that we needed to talk?” 

“Varric’s in trouble,” Curly got up to pace.

“I figured that out when I saw that he was already drinking,” Athena quipped, “What kind of trouble?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

“He told me it was something he could handle and that was all the further we got."

“There’s been attempts made on his life,” Cullen stated, now worried that someone coming for me would get Athena caught in the cross hairs (with all his worrying I’m surprised his hair hasn’t grayed.)

“The merchant’s guild?” Athena guessed.

“How did you know?” Cullen was starting to wonder if Duchess had a secret spy group.

“It’s not the first time that they’ve come after him. Isn’t the leader of the guild here?” Athena stood.

“Wouldn’t that be a question for Josephine?” Cullen asked as they walked down the stairs.

Athena chuckled, “I thought we had walked by him when we went in to the war room. If he is here, the assassination attempts are going to end once and for all.”

“Someone should sober up Varric first,” Cullen said.

“You can do that. He likes you,” Athena smiled mischievously at him as she grabbed a chocolate chip cookie off of a table in the main hall.

“And what are you going to do?” Cullen was unable to hide his smile.

“I’m going to set up a meeting with this merchant’s guild leader and keep going up the chain of command until they stop trying to hurt Varric,” Athena followed that with a warning, “And if that’s going to be your reaction every time I grab a cookie. Our secret won’t stay a secret.”

Cullen kissed her, “I can smile at my wife if I want to.”

Athena shook her head at him and disappeared in to Ruffles’ office while Curly went to get a bucket of water.

Josephine looked up from what she was writing when she heard Athena enter, “Your Worship.”

“Josie!” Athena was disappointed that after all the times she had reprimanded her friend that Ruffles would call her that in privacy.

“Sorry, I’ve been in meetings all day,” Ruffles blushed.

“I’ll forgive you this once. Is the leader of the merchant’s guild here?” Athena asked.

“He is. Did you need to speak to him?” 

“I do. As soon as possible,” Athena requested, expecting Josephine to set up a meeting.

“I believe he was heading to the tavern,” Josephine answered.

“Thank you!” Athena swiftly walked toward the door.

“Athena, hold a moment?” Josephine said getting up from her desk. Athena stopped with her hand on the door handle. Ruffles walked over to her and asked, “Are you well?”

“I’m fine. Why?” Athena asked.

“I was talking to Dagna and saw Morrigan escorting Caerwin to your chambers. If you are ill, I will send a polite refusal to those you are meeting with on the morrow,” Josephine explained.

“I’m fine. Thank you for your concern, but I really must be going,” Athena opened the door and dashed out of it before Ruffles could say anything else. She caught up with Curly just as he dumped water on me, defending me she said, “You were supposed to sober him up, not drown him.”

Cullen smiled wickedly and said nothing. I, on the other hand, “I’ll get you back for that, Curly.”

“We don’t have time for that,” Athena said, “the merchant's guild leader is here.”

“Your point?” I questioned warily.

“We’re going to have a little chat with him,” Athena smiled her sweetest at me.

“Duchess, don’t,” I warned.

“If she doesn’t I will,” Cullen warned quietly. 

“Shouldn’t you two be off enjoying marital bliss?” I griped, none too happy about this development.

“That was the past week,” Curly groused, unhappy that as soon they came home, chaos reigned.

“Varric, compared to everything else that will be going on in the next several weeks, this is easy. Let me talk to him,” Athena implored.

“Fine.” I sighed, giving in, “You can also get your cousin to pay his debts too.”

“You two started that long before Dorian and I knew we were related. That’s all on you, my friend,” Athena washed her hands of her cousin’s debts. 

Cullen had gone off to get Daimos (merchant guild leader.) When Curly came back with Daimos, he asked, “Where would you like this meeting to take place, Inquisitor?”

Athena looked around her for an appropriate meeting place and saw the door to the dungeon. She inclined her head that way, Curly nodded in agreement. And we all followed the Inquisitor in to the dungeon. Once the door was shut behind us Duchess turned on Daimos, “You and the merchant’s guild have made many attempts on the life of an agent of the Inquisition. He is invaluable to us and any and all attempts to end Varric Tethras’ life will cease immediately or the merchant’s guild will feel the full force of the Inquisition.”

“You don’t know what he’s done,” Daimos blamed me.

“Did he murder someone? Has he tortured innocent people?” Athena asked imperially.

“No,” Daimos mulishly answered. 

“Then it doesn’t matter does it?” Cullen questioned.

“Bogden is my best friend’s son and Varric consistently tries to steal his wife away from him!” Daimos yelled.

“Bianca and I were in love long before Bogden came in to the picture,” I snarled.

“Daimos, the attacks stop now. Varric has been very respectful of Bianca’s and Bogden’s marriage. I’ve met Bianca, if she didn’t want Varric around she would tell him,” Athena tried to make the dwarf see reason.

“Bianca’s innocent in all this,” Daimos grumbled.

“I have a hard time believing that considering she threatened to feed me my eyeballs if Varric died,” Athena smirked, knowing that she had Daimos at his weakest.

“She what?!” Curly and I exclaimed together.

Athena rolled her eyes at us, “Daimos, do we have an agreement? The attempts on Varric’s life stop and the Inquisition can continue to trade with the merchant’s guild as if nothing happened… Or we can put the guild out of business.”

“The attacks will stop,” Daimos said, defeated.

“Thank you,” Athena said sweetly.

Daimos left first. Curly and I hung back as we had questions for Duchess. I beat Curly to the punch, “When did Bianca threaten you?”

“Why did she threaten you?” Cullen asked, right on my heels.

Athena left the dungeon without saying a word, took a deep breath of the fresh air and exhaling, murmured, ”The air in there stinks.” She turned to look at us, smiling serenely, “When was before we left Valammar. And why? Because she loves him, I’ve threatened far worse for those I love.” Her eyes never left Curly’s.

“We’re meeting Mia for dinner tonight,” Cullen stood in front of her and took hold of her hand.

“Varric, when you write to Bianca, don’t forget to mention that I value your life too,” Athena was still lost in Cullen’s eyes.

“I won’t, Duchess,” and to myself, “I’ll tell her exactly what you did.” Cullen kissed her then and I smiled as I headed off to write a not so nice letter to my “love.”


	44. Chapter 44

Our dinner trio finished eating Athena yawned causing Mia to chuckle, “I wish I could stay.”

“Why can’t you?” Cullen inquired, very surprised that his sister was leaving so soon.

“Rosalie was upset because I left for the wedding and decided to stay longer than she thought necessary,” Mia had a tinge of frustration and sadness in her voice.

“Why does it matter to her how long you take?” Athena was astounded by the selfishness of Cullen’s youngest sibling.

“Because she’s terrified of being a mother. She lacks the patience for it,” Mia said wistfully.

“Did you ever want a family of your own?” Athena asked as gently as she could.

“You know, I never really thought about it. I was seven when Cullen was born, and then Branson was born three years after that, and Rosalie two years after Branson. I always felt that I had a hand in raising them. And now I get to help raise Rosalie’s children,” Mia answered.

“Not interested in helping us then?” Cullen teased.

“For all the sass I give you, I trust you. You were always very good with Branson and Rosalie. Even if I didn’t trust you… You have Athena,” Mia winked at him.

Athena blushed. Curly shook his head, “Rosalie and Timson aren’t working out then?”

“They love each other… I think… She wants to find a way to marry him. But he doesn’t want her to. And it creates arguments,” Mia explained.

“Wasn’t the whole point of him being part of the Inquisition was to protect Rosalie?” Athena yawned again. Cullen almost imperceptibly growled which had the ladies chuckling.

“That’s what I’ve been told,” Mia smiled as Athena unsuccessfully stifled another yawn, “I think it’s time I took my leave. You’re about eight weeks along?”

“Yes. Why?” Athena stood to stretch.

“Planning my return trip to Skyhold,” Mia hugged both Cullen and Athena, “Goodnight. I’ll be leaving on the morrow.”

“We’ll be there to see you off,” Cullen smiled at his sister, she returned the smile and left.

Athena walked out on to the balcony and breathed in the crisp night air. Cullen followed her and put his arms around her, “For one that is so tired, the last place I think you would want to be is on the balcony.”

Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears, “I want Mia to have a reason to come back.”

Cullen released her only to turn her to face him, “She has two very good reasons to come back. I’m her brother and she has a new sister in you. No matter what happens with this pregnancy, she will be back.”

Athena opened her tear filled eyes to meet his loving gaze, “I want this one to stay…” She choked back a sob, “I wanted the last one to stay too.”

Cullen pulled her into his arms and held her as she cried. Fighting back his own tears, he said hoarsely, “I know, Athena, I know.” When her sobbing was reduced to hiccups, he whispered, “I think it’s time for bed.” She nodded in agreement. 

Curly picked her up and carried her to bed which brought out a small chuckle as Athena said, “I do have to get undressed.”

Cullen placed her in the bed and started moving her dress up as he kissed her legs, then her belly, chest, arms, and finally lips as the dress came off. Athena moaned in ecstasy and Curly’s smile had a hint of smugness to it as they made love before drifting off to sleep.

Cullen woke well before dawn because of his dreams. Knowing that he wasn’t going to get any more sleep, he wrote Athena a note and placed it on his pillow. Silently leaving he made his way from their quarters all the way to the room that was used for chantry services and started praying. He prayed for their unborn child and that it would be born, asked why Athena had to suffer a miscarriage, and prayed for Athena to survive everything being thrown at her currently.

That is where Athena found him before breakfast, she listened until he finished praying, “Cullen, Mia is about to leave.”

“I’m sorry,” Cullen stood and turned to face her. Athena was pale and her hair hadn’t been brushed. He was instantly worried, “Are you ill?”

Athena smiled wanly at him, “I couldn’t sleep and when I finally got back to sleep I was woken up.”

Cullen apologized again as he took hold of her hand and they left the garden to go to the main gate.

“It’s not your fault that I couldn’t sleep.”

“I should have stayed,” he softly chastised himself.

“I don’t understand?” Athena was confused. During the war, Curly had been quite frequently gone before sunrise for meetings, training with soldiers, and other things.

“You weren’t the only one that had a sleepless night,” Cullen blushed slightly, “Why weren’t you able to sleep?”

“You’re not the only one that had bad dreams,” Athena said softly. 

Their conversation ended as Mia approached them, “I was starting to worry.”

“Sleepless night,” Cullen hugged his sister.

Mia noticed that Athena was pale, “Athena?”

“Cullen wasn’t the only one that had a sleepless night,” Athena answered as they hugged.

“Take time for yourself today,” Mia ordered, sounding suspiciously like Curly.

“I’ll try,” Athena didn’t want to promise anything as she knew she had a day full of meetings.

“She will,” Cullen decided for her. Athena cocked an eyebrow at him, not happy that he was making decisions for her.

“Be good, you two, and I’ll see you in a few months,” Mia waved from her carriage.

“After breakfast, why don’t you go back to bed?” Cullen wanted to order her back to bed, but he was also smart enough to know that that would just start a fight.

“I have a meeting starting with breakfast,” Athena answered.

“With who?” Curly was irritated on her behalf.

“Alistair, Selene, Josie, Leliana, and some noble they all want me to meet. This meeting has been set up since before we left,” Athena explained.

“You will be able to eat?” He hoped as they walked up the stairs to the keep.

“I hope so,” she waved at me as they walked past.

“Are we still on for lunch?” Cullen wanted to make sure of their plans as they stopped outside Josephine’s door.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Athena kissed him goodbye and went in to Josephine’s office.

“There she is!” Alistair exclaimed.

“We were starting to get worried, Inquisitor,” Leliana said.

“We had to say goodbye to Mia,” Athena sat at the table.

“Mia is Cullen’s sister right?” Selene got up to walk around.

“She is,” Athena took a bite of food.

“Not hungry, my love?” Alistair watched Selene’s every move.

“No,” Selene turned pale and fought the urge to gag.

Athena looked at Ruffles for an explanation. She shrugged and whispered, “Are you all right? You look unkempt.”

“Sleepless night,” Athena whispered back and then louder, “Selene, if you need to rest, we can postpone this.”

“Thank you, I’m just restless,” Selene returned to her seat in between Alistair and Athena. She rested her hands on her extended belly, which was promptly rewarded with a kick.

“If you are certain,” Leliana sounded unsure.

“Where is this noble you wanted me to meet?” Athena was even more anxious to get this meeting over with.

“There isn’t one,” Ruffles smiled, “this is to plan your husband’s name-day party.”

“He’s going to kill you,” Athena laughed.

“That’s why he isn’t here,” Leliana quipped.

“You two wanted to help plan this?” Athena asked after she finished her meal.

“We did,” Selene shifted around in her seat, unable to find a comfortable position.

Athena stood and wondered, “Why? Josie, where do you keep your pillows?”

“There’s a small one in my chair behind my desk,” Ruffles was confused by Duchess’ odd request.

Athena grabbed the pillow and put it low on Selene’s back, who sat back in the chair with a sigh of relief, “Thank you. Cullen’s a good man and his name day should be celebrated. Now, how large of a party should be planned for the Commander?”

“And as an apology for how rude Arl Teagan was to you. I wanted to be assured that you wouldn’t invade us, he pressed for the Inquisition to be dismantled,” Alistair explained by way of an apology.

“Thank you, Your Majesty…. If we want to live, a small one,” Athena joked. Everyone chuckled. Selene’s chuckle was cut short because she winced, prompting Duchess to query, “How long have you been in pain?”

“Selene, what is she talking about?” Alistair demanded an answer.

“I’ve been having one about once a day since the day before we arrived, and it’s always accompanied by morning sickness. I’m sorry, Alistair, I didn’t want to worry you,” Selene quietly spoke.

“The herbs Morrigan gave you aren’t working?” Athena tried to find a way to help the queen without her needing to use her magic.

“I can’t use them. Every time I look at them, they turn my stomach,” Selene alternately rubbed and held her belly, “But we’re not here to discuss me. How small are you thinking, Athena?” 

“If it was left up to Cullen, it would be just him and I, and he probably doesn’t even want me to remember,” Athena watched Selene closely for any sign of labor.

“We have to do something,” Ruffles moaned.

“A small party, Josie. You know I trust you… Why am I here again?” Athena responded to the plaintive tone in Josephine’s voice.

“How else were we to get you away from your husband?” Leliana smirked. 

“You didn’t have to lie about the reason for the meeting,” Duchess griped.

“The deception was my idea,” Selene stopped to inhale sharply, and then finished her thought, leaning painfully forward and panting, “Varric had told me of how you would tell Cullen of the pranks he wanted to pull.”

“Varric forgot to mention that he was always pushing me to talk to Cullen… Leliana, can you get Caerwin and bring her to my chambers? Alistair, you’re going to have to carry Selene up to my quarters,” Athena ordered as Nightingale ran to get Caerwin.

“I can walk,” Selene stood and then placed her hands on the table and groaned.

“You’ve had several contractions since I walked into the room. The only thing I can think of is to keep you off of your feet,” Athena said as Alistair scooped Selene up in his arms and carried her out. Athena turned her attention to Ruffles, “I’m going to go get Morrigan. Go with them please? Have Selene lay on my bed, on her left side.”

Fortunately for her Morrigan was in the main hall, and with a few brief words Morrigan was following the queen up the stairs. Athena thought it would be wise to let Curly know that she was fine, so she left the main hall and as she was descending the final set of stairs to the courtyard, she almost got ran over by her husband, “Maker’s breath! Are you all right?”

Athena chuckled, “I’m fine, Cullen.”

“I was going to train the soldiers when I saw Caerwin enter the keep and I thought…” Cullen trailed off, not wanting to say what he was thinking lest it became true.

“I was on my way to you to let you know that I was fine,” Athena said softly.

“Then who was Caerwin going to see?” Cullen was selfishly grateful that Athena and their baby were fine.

“It’s Selene. She’s having labor pains, but she shouldn’t be yet,” Athena quietly informed him, wary of who may be listening.

“Will the baby survive?” Cullen asked as they walked back in to the keep.

“If it’s born now?” Athena sought clarification and Cullen nodded in answer. She continued, “I doubt it. The labor needs to be stopped for at least another month… And I don’t know if that’s possible.”

“You’re not going to try to slow her labor down?” Cullen was very worried now.

“Even if I could, it wouldn’t help... Cullen, the reason I was hurt when we saved Selene from the demon was because I was putting her and the baby to sleep, healing her, and Marie all at the same time. I had to do the sleep spells twice. Doing them one at a time, doesn’t have an effect on me,” Athena explained.

“You’re with child now, too,” Cullen whispered as he caressed Athena’s still normal belly with the back of his hand.  
“That’s the reason I’m here with you instead of helping up there… And I didn’t want you to worry,” she said softly as she stopped his caress by holding his hand in place against her belly, kissing him.

“Thank you,” he whispered hoarsely. 

“You’re welcome, my love,” Athena whispered.

Arthur was witness to the tender scene, and softly cleared his throat to let our lovers know that they were no longer alone, “I had heard that Caerwin was needed?”

“I asked her to be brought here for the Queen,” Athena explained.

“What’s wrong with her?” Arthur mentally breathed a sigh of relief.

“She’s having contractions and she shouldn’t be.”

“How far along is she?” Cullen wondered if this was something Athena would be subject to as well.

“Six or seven months would be my guess.”

“Are you going up there?” Arthur wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea for Duchess to be there in case Queenie was really in labor.

“I should,” Athena looked down and blushed, embarrassed to admit that she was terrified of what was happening to the Queen. 

“But?” Cullen asked softly. Athena looked up at him with tears swimming in her eyes.

“It’s all right that you don’t want to go, Athena,” Arthur put his hand on his daughter’s shoulder, “though, if it’s all right with you two, I would like to see if I can help.”

“It’s fine with me,” Athena answered, Cullen nodded in agreement. Arthur left them to head to our lovers’ quarters.

Cullen kissed her hard and passionately in unspoken relief that she was well, and then regretfully said, “I really have to go train our forces.”

“I understand. Go,” Athena stifled a yawn.

“What are you going to do?” He asked, not letting go of her. He was still concerned over how tired she was.  
“Everyone that I had a meeting scheduled with is currently in our quarters so…” Athena paused to yawn again, exhaustion hitting her now that the excitement had died down, “I may see if Varric and Dorian want to play a hand of Wicked a Grace.”

“Athena, you’re exhausted. Why don’t you go back to bed?” Cullen asked. Everything in him told him to order her back to bed.

“Can’t, our quarters are currently in use,” Athena half heartedly teased.

“There is a bed that still resides above my office. The last I slept in it, it was still pretty comfortable,” Cullen responded in a teasing tone as he put his arm around her waist and they started walking in the direction of Curly’s office.

Athena fought off another yawn as they neared his office, “I’ve become spoiled.”

Curly chuckled, “Is that so?”

“I was able to fight demons, darkspawn, red Templars, and an occasional dragon on three or four hours of sleep. Now I need to take naps when I get a decent night’s sleep…” Athena was interrupted by a yawn, “and when I don’t get a decent night’s sleep…”

Cullen closed the door behind them and smiled, “When you were out saving the world, you weren’t with child,” he climbed up the ladder behind her. Duchess fell in to bed after taking her shoes off. Curly sat beside her and kissed her, “I’d much rather have a sleepy wife than an ill one.” Athena was already asleep. He pulled the covers over her and left. 

Cullen met Darius outside of Skyhold’s walls. Darius asked, “The Inquisitor?”

“Is fine,” Curly answered and then almost shouting, “Let’s get to work!”

When Curly came back in for lunch Sparkler was waiting for him, “Where are you hiding my cousin?”

“She was in my quarters sleeping when I left,” Cullen answered.

“Why do you still have your own quarters?” Dorian questioned.

“Because we just got married for all to know a week ago.” Cullen said as they walked up to his office.

“The Ambassador could have moved everything while you two were away,” Sparkler suggested.

“Yes, because that was the first thing I thought of when I married Athena,” Cullen chuckled and outright laughed when he saw Dorian blush, “What did you need her for?”

“Leliana and Josephine are searching for her,” Dorian humbly informed him.

“I thought they were with the Queen?” Cullen opened the door to his office.

“They aren’t anymore,” Sparkler shrugged, unable to tell him more. “Is Athena ill?”

“No, why would you think that?” Cullen acted surprised by Dorian’s question. He didn’t want to give anything away without talking to Duchess first.

“Then why is she here sleeping? And why wasn’t she helping the Queen?” Dorian was perplexed over his cousin’s odd behavior lately.

“If we tell you,” Athena climbed down the ladder, “You absolutely cannot tell anyone else.”

“It’s that serious?” Sparkler was now very worried.

Athena walked over to Cullen, needing to be close to him. He put an arm around her waist and pulled her in close to his side. Athena said, barely above a whisper, “I’m with child again.”

“And you didn’t want to tell anyone in case…” Dorian trailed off. Athena’s smile turned to one of sadness and she nodded. Sparkler muttered to himself, “I knew I should have lit that damned woman on fire.”

“What are you talking about Dorian?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at Dorian. Usually his outbursts were more self mockery, not of irritation and chastisement.

“After the baby was lost Athena was walking in the courtyard and a woman came up to her with all these ideas on how she could get pregnant again and how she could keep it next time. The woman also asked her why she lost the baby. I interrupted the one sided conversation, the woman apologized and ran off,” Dorian was pacing, still very irritated with himself and the over reaching woman.

“Why wasn’t I told?” Cullen came very close to growling.

“No offense, Commander, but you were back to taking lyrium and putting a rather large guilt trip on yourself. Athena was so blinded with guilt and heartache that she couldn’t see straight. Varric, Darius, and I have been warning the “well intentioned people” off as much as we can since then,” Sparkler explained.

“And now I know why the conversations stopped so abruptly,” Athena mumbled.

“Thank you, Dorian,” Cullen sighed, feeling guilty for his error in judgement in taking lyrium again.

“On to happier things. How far along are you?” Dorian’s smile sparkled.

“A little over two months,” Athena answered.

“When were you planning on telling everyone?” Sparkler inquired.

“My original plan was when I reached three months,” Duchess paused, “but with what Selene is going through, I may want to wait a little longer.”

“My dear, Selene is fine and so is the baby. Leliana said that Caerwin had called it a false labor and that everything is as it should be. Leliana and Josephine have more details, and they are looking for you,” Dorian said, “I’m going to take my leave. I won’t tell a soul.”

Athena thanked him as he opened the door and left. She looked at Cullen, “I guess I should go find out the story then.”

Cullen took her hand and smiled down at her, “Let’s go.” Athena’s stomach grumbled loudly and Curly chuckled, “We should get lunch first.”

Cullen and Athena met Josephine and Leliana in Ruffles’ office. Leliana was the first to speak, “Caerwin said that it was a false labor, and the baby is not any closer to being born than when she checked Selene last. But, with having daily contractions and that they’re getting worse, Caerwin advised that they stay in Skyhold until the baby is born.”

“Where are they now?” Athena inquired.

“In their quarters. Alistair was not happy that Selene was hiding having issues from him,” Leliana responded.

“What do you mean?” Cullen asked.

“She’s apparently had these false labor pains about once a month since she found out that she was with child,” Leliana explained.

“And she didn’t say anything?” Athena was incredulous.

“To her midwife in Denerim. Who advised her to not travel…” Leliana answered.

“And she did anyway,” Cullen breathed out.

“Why would she put herself and her baby at risk like that?” Athena couldn’t believe they were having this conversation about the Hero of Fereldan.

“She said that she felt obligated to,” Leliana responded softly.

“Kieran,” Athena almost whispered, horrified.

“But Kieran’s not hers,” Josephine joined in.

“If Bull found out that he had a child, and the mother invited him to get to know the child, would you keep him from that opportunity?” Athena questioned, knowing that Josephine had too big of a heart to refuse a child a father’s love.

“I… Don’t… Know,” Ruffles hesitated with her answer, wanting to believe that she would do the right thing… But to risk her own child? She wasn’t so sure.

“But she put another of Alistair’s children at risk by doing this. Not to mention the great risk to herself,” Cullen was quite irritated with Selene himself.

“Morrigan is livid,” Leliana warned.

Athena chuckled softly, “I can imagine,” and then she sighed, understanding the queen’s motives all too well, “She’s put everyone’s wants, desires, needs above her own for so long that she doesn’t know any other way. I do have one question though, why didn’t the midwife from Denerim come with her?”

“Selene said that the midwife was unwilling and would not be party to her Queen’s death or the death of the next prince or princess,” Leliana replied.

“One can’t really argue with that logic,” Curly stated, proud of the midwife for standing her ground.

“Any idea on where Morrigan is now?” Athena knew Morrigan would need to let off steam.

“You’re not worried about Selene?” Cullen was surprised, especially considering that Athena was with child as well... And then he thought, on second thought, maybe it’s best if Athena stays away from Selene in case the false labor thing is catching.

“Selene has Alistair, and I’m more worried about Morrigan changing someone in to something undesirable,” Athena paused as she watched a fireball fly past the window and ran for the door, “found her.” 

“Athena!” Cullen exclaimed running after her. Causing Ruffles and Nightingale to laugh. Curly caught up to Duchess before she got to Morrigan, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Calming down a friend,” Athena spoke with absolute certainty.

“I believe Morrigan can calm herself down,” Cullen grabbed Athena’s arm to prevent her from going any farther.

“Before or after she torches the garden?” Athena was not really expecting an answer. 

“I think you’re giving her too little credit,” Cullen argued.

“Cullen, friends don’t come easy to her. I’ve told you before that Morrigan and I have more in common than just being mages. She also invited Alistair and Selene here early to get to know Kieran, only to have Selene jeopardize herself. She tried to be kind and it backfired on her,” Athena’s heart broke for her friend.

“I’m still coming with you,” Cullen caressed her arm down to where he could take hold of her hand.

“I love you, but you’re not going to want to be part of this conversation,” Athena warned him off.

“Why not?” Cullen was now very suspicious.

Athena kissed him, “Trust me on this, please?”

“I always trust you,” Cullen said quietly.

“Then let me talk to her alone,” Athena entreated. Cullen didn’t like it, but he gave a single nod of his head, kissed her, and then went back inside the keep. 

Athena walked over to a furiously pacing Morrigan. Morrigan took one look at her and commanded, “Inquisitor, not one step further.”

“Morrigan, my chambers, now,” Athena left as though she expected Morrigan to follow her. Surprisingly, Morrigan was so shocked at being ordered by her friend that she followed without question.

Once the ladies were on the balcony looking out over the mountains. Morrigan gave vent to her fury, “Why would she be so stupid as to pull a stunt like this? After getting caught by that demon the last time, one would think she’d want to stay safe behind Denerim’s walls.”

“I’m surprised that she didn’t tell you when you gave her the herbs,” Athena said quietly.

“So am I. When Selene and Alistair got together all they talked of was how after they defeated the archdemon they would have children. They would find a way. They have a beautiful adopted daughter and another child on the way and she puts it all in jeopardy because I extend an invitation?!” Morrigan started pacing again, “I would love to blame Alistair for this, but as usual, he was completely oblivious. She’s always been selfless, but this goes beyond that.”

“She’s been putting everyone else’s desires and needs before her own for so long that she doesn’t know another way,” Duchess said softly, looking out over the mountains, unable to not see certain parallels between her and the Queen. When she turned to face Morrigan, “She’s a hero. Pain, sacrifice, they mean nothing if it can make someone else happy.”

“Happy? No one would be happy if she lost that child. There comes a time when heroes need to put away the heroics and have a life. That time for Selene is now. And if you ever pull a stunt like this I’m turning you in to a toad,” Morrigan said with passion.

Athena chuckled softly, “Without the anchor, there’s little I can do.”

Morrigan watched Athena for a while, “You are still the Inquisitor. You decided to keep some of the Inquisition’s forces to serve the Divine in a peace-keeping role... You and Selene both deserve to have a life outside of being heroes or inquisitors.”

“It’s wrong to say this… But right now being Inquisitor isn’t my primary concern,” Athena remarked as she placed her hand low on her belly, thinking of the child she hoped was growing there.

Morrigan smiled at her in approval of what she said and her posture, “This is why I consider you a friend…. And at least your husband is a competent, some what intelligent man.”

Athena laughed, “Have a good day, Morrigan.”

**

Cullen’s name day arrived and he was not pleased. He had made plans to hide away with Athena only to be told by Leliana that Athena would be leaving in the morning. Cullen was pacing in the rookery (Nightingale’s “office”,) “Have you told Athena that she’s leaving in the morning?”

“She hasn’t said anything to you?” Leliana asked with a straight face (it was of course all a lie so Cullen wouldn’t spirit Duchess away.)

“No, she hasn’t,” Cullen practically growled.

“She has been quite distracted lately. Maybe she forgot? Is she feeling well?”

“She’s fine,” Cullen sighed in frustration, knowing that he almost told Nightingale that Athena was with child.

“It doesn’t sound as though she’s fine,” Leliana cocked an eyebrow at him.

“She’s perfectly healthy… I just worry too much,” Cullen softly remarked, “I’m going to go find her. Thank you, Leliana.”

“You are quite welcome… Cullen,” Nightingale smirked.

Cullen stopped and turned on his heel to stare at her. He murmured, “Took you long enough.” And he descended the stairs and into the library with a smug smile.

“The Commander is looking very smug on his name day. Did you get your wish?” Sparkler inquired. Cullen had told him his plans, which Dorian whole heartedly approved of.

“No, but Leliana just used my name instead of my title,” Cullen smirked.

“That’s a big deal, is it?” Dorian walked down to the main hall with him.

“I’m the only one that she’s exclusively used a title for,” Curly griped.

“I don’t call you by your given name,” Dorian reminded him.

“Athena told me that you use my title more as a nickname,” he smirked again.

“That wife of yours should not be revealing my secrets to you. Especially since she’s my cousin,” Sparkler blushed.

“As you so aptly said, she’s my wife. And I’m going to go find her,” Cullen walked away before Dorian could respond and headed toward the quarters he shared with Athena.

I chuckled hearing the exchange, “You’re not going to find her there, Curly.”

“Varric, some days you make a better spy than some of Leliana’s agents,” Curly remarked. I couldn’t tell if he was happy that I noticed so much or if he was irritated by it.

“Consider it a name day present. Your wife is in the garden with her namesake, Kieran, Ana, and I’m not allowed to say who else,” I informed him, choosing to believe he was complementing me.

“I’ve already had enough surprises for this day,” he mumbled as he walked out in to the garden. 

The picture that greeted him was Duchess holding a toddling Marie’s hand and she was laughing at the older three. Ana was using her magic to make bubbles for Tommy (who came to visit) and Kieran to chase. Cullen smiled and started to walk over to her. The boys saw him first and rushed to tackle him. Which he avoided by picking one up under each arm and tickling them until they cried for mercy. Ana smiled and blushed when Curly smiled back at her.

Athena laughed at the scene before her. Cullen kissed her gently as she continued to bounce Marie on her knee and then he asked, “Find the boys attacking me funny, do you?”

“You handled yourself well,” Athena teased, and once he sat beside her she kissed him, “Happy name day, my love.”

Blushing, he coughed, “Thank you. On baby and kid duty again?”

“Kieran, Tommy, and Ana barely need watched, but Morrigan had Marie…” Athena trailed off.

“Where is she now?” Cullen put an arm around his wife.

“Taking a well deserved break or yelling at the royals.”

Cullen chuckled, “You’ve been spending too much time with Varric again. Why did Morrigan have Marie?”

Athena shrugged, she honestly had no idea, “When I came out in to the garden Morrigan handed her to me and said “Here, she likes you.” And then she walked off.”

“You were gone when I woke up,” Cullen wasn’t sure if he should chastise her or be happy that it seemed her constant fatigue was leaving.

“It’s your name day, you deserved to sleep in,” Athena turned Marie around to make silly faces at her.

“I had made plans for today and the next couple days…” Cullen trailed off.

“You did? When were you going to tell me?” She was still playing with Marie.

“When we got up this morning,” Cullen was unable to stop the smile that watching Athena and Marie play brought to his soul, along with a prayer that it would be their baby on her knee in several months.

“I’m sorry. I had an early morning meeting.”

“Did that meeting have anything to do with you leaving on the morrow?”

“Leaving?” Athena glanced at him, confused, and then it dawned on her, “Oh, shopping.”

“With who? And for what?” Cullen reached out to Marie as she reached out for him. 

Athena put Marie on his lap and spoke, “Probably Dorian and I’m going to need new clothing soon.”

“Why?” Cullen glanced at Duchess from making faces at Marie. 

Athena just stared at him, “Really, Cullen?”

“Oh, right,” Curly blushed, embarrassed that he forgot that she was pregnant.

“And there’s a nasty rumor going round that the Inquisitor is the forgetful one of late,” Morrigan smirked.

“I am not that bad,” Athena blushed as she felt the need to defend herself. Duchess also knew that she was forgetting things that she felt were important and was frustrated with herself.

“I can take Marie back to her parents if you wish,” Morrigan said softly.

“In a moment. Why is it that you don’t yell at Morrigan for calling you Inquisitor?” Cullen found Duchess’ acceptance of what Morrigan called her odd.

“I don’t yell at people for it and If I said anything to her about it, she’d just do it more often,” Athena groused.

Morrigan chuckled, “Your lovely and intelligent wife is quite correct. And it’s all the more reason I enjoy calling her friend.” Marie started to get fussy and Morrigan took her from Curly saying, “Time to get this one back to her mother.”

After watching Morrigan and Marie leave, Athena smiled at Cullen, “What would you like to do with your name day, my handsome husband?”

Cullen kissed her with unsated passion, “Spend it with you.”

“I think that can be arranged… At least until dinner time,” Athena teased.

“Woman,” he growled as they left the garden.

“You aren’t the only one that had plans,” she said huskily. They went up to their chambers and spent an idyllic day of making love and napping (at least for Athena) until dinner time.

“Are you going to tell me what you have planned?” Cullen asked. He laid in bed with both hands behind his head and enjoyed watching his wife dress in a velvet gown that matched the color of her eyes. He thought that he noticed a slight increase to Athena’s waist line, but he dismissed it as wishful thinking.

“You’ll find out once you get dressed and go down to the main hall,” Athena brushed her hair.

“And if I’d rather spend the rest of the evening with just you?” He stubbornly refused to move.

“Then I can’t give you the present I have for you,” Athena tried to tempt him.

“Marrying me and being with child isn’t enough?” Cullen finally got out of bed.

“Your name day deserves to be celebrated too,” Athena waited for him to get dressed. Then she smirked as her stomach growled. She knew Cullen wouldn't refuse her, “And I’m hungry.”

Cullen got dressed muttering about unborn children turning against their fathers which had Athena laughing very hard. Cullen smiled, hearing her laughter and watched as she wiped tears away. He said, barely above a whisper, “I love you.”

Athena walked over to him, took his hand and kissed him, “I love you, too.”

When they came through the main hall doors, everyone shouted, “Surprise!”

Cullen looked askance at Athena, “Not nice.”

“Surprising you was not my idea,” Athena grinned unrepentantly.

“Who’s idea was it?” Cullen was going to challenge them to a sparring match on the morrow.

“The one that is pregnant,” Leliana smirked, “Happy name day, Commander.”

“Leliana’s explanation doesn’t help,” Cullen whispered to Athena as he nodded at Nightingale.

“I already told you that it wasn’t me!” Athena fiercely whispered back.

Arthur noticed them whispering and walked over to them, “Happy name day, son. What are you two whispering about?”

“He doesn’t believe me that surprising him wasn’t my idea,” Athena teased.

“The single clue I was given doesn’t really help,” Curly griped.

“Which one is noticeably with child?” Arthur conspiratorially whispered.

“Selene,” Curly was disappointed, he couldn’t challenge the Queen of Fereldan to a sparring match. Cullen took hold of Duchess’ hand, “You are not leaving my side this night.”

“Don’t I get a say in this?” Athena asked as she was pulled through the crowd.

“No,” Cullen unequivocally stated. As a tray of chocolate chip cookies passed by, Athena grabbed one and started to eat it as Curly stood in front of Selene, “I’m told this surprise party was your idea.”

“It was,” Selene was unapologetic.

“I had plans made of a get away with my wife. That had to be put on hold…” Cullen turned to look at Athena as realization dawned on him, “You lied to me.”

“No, I didn’t. I still have every intention of going shopping tomorrow. I’ll just probably do it at the stands inside Skyhold,” Athena replied to his charge. 

“I asked if you were leaving and you said that you were going shopping,” Cullen admonished.

“I didn’t say where I was going shopping nor did I say that I was leaving. Why aren’t you talking to Leliana? She’s the one that originally told you that I was leaving,” Athena argued as the royals watched them go back and forth.

“That doesn’t answer why you went along with it,” Cullen retorted.

“Cullen, I know what you thought when Leliana told you I was leaving. I picked the safest option without having to give away tonight,” Athena tried a more gentle tone, understanding her husband’s reticence in letting her go.

“No more surprise parties,” Cullen ordered as he softly caressed Athena’s cheek.

“In the Inquisitor’s defense she never wanted it to be a surprise,” Selene rubbed her belly.

“Why?” Curly found the queen’s admission to be odd.

“She didn’t want to lie to you,” Selene finished quietly as Cullen started kissing his wife.

After they finished kissing Cullen said, “Thank you, your majesty. Would my lovely wife like to dance with me?”

“After we eat,” Athena smiled up at him.

“There was a time that a single cookie would fill you,” Cullen whispered, teasing.

“Cullen,” Duchess warned. He kissed her in response and they sat down to eat with the royals. Leliana, Josephine, and Morrigan joined them. Athena noticed that Bull wasn’t joining them, “No Bull tonight?”

“He and the Chargers had to run a scouting mission for Leliana. They left this morning,” Josephine explained.

“Scouting mission for where?” Cullen was instantly concerned as this was the first he heard of this mission.

“At Haven,” Leliana answered.

“When you told Cullen that I was leaving on the morrow...?” Athena trailed off, worried that Leliana had been telling her husband the truth.

“Bull and the Chargers aren’t expected back for another week,” Leliana answered. Cullen and Athena both breathed a sigh of relief.

“Why did you lie to me this morning?” Cullen was still quite perturbed over this.

“If I hadn’t would you have stayed? Or would you have pestered the Inquisitor in to giving up the party?” Leliana asked in response.

“I don’t pester,” Curly grumbled.

“Inquisitor?” Alistair raised an eyebrow as he pulled Selene close to him and put an arm around her.

Athena finished eating before saying anything, “Oh no, I’m staying out of this one.”

Selene chuckled softly, “Wise woman.”

“How have you been feeling, Your Majesty?” Ruffles inquired to change the subject. It looked as though Nightingale and Curly wanted to challenge each other to a sparring match.

“I’m fine,” Selene answered reluctantly.

“Are you still having contractions?” Athena saw the dark looks on her husband’s and friend’s face. She was hoping this would get their mind off of killing each other.

“So long as I take it easy, no,” Selene replied and then griped, “Tonight isn’t about me.”

“Athena and I haven’t had much of a chance to talk to you lately,” Cullen said gently after Athena nudged him with her foot under the table, breaking him of a quickly descending in to a foul mood.

“Why have you been going with the Inquisitor on her missions?” Leliana pried… She wasn’t done with him, not by a long shot.

“Because she’s my wife?” Cullen returned sardonically. 

“You were in love with her before and married her in Halamshiral. Why the sudden change?” Leliana kept up the interrogation. She knew they were hiding something, she just didn’t know what.

“You know as well as I do the threats against her. Is it so wrong that I want to protect my wife?” Athena’s attempts at keeping Curly from a foul mood proved to be in vain.

Athena sighed thinking that they should have stayed in their quarters, “Are you ready to dance, my love?”

“Gladly,” he smiled at her and they made their way to the area for dancing.

Once they were far enough away from prying ears Athena began, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Cullen was confused… He wasn’t angry with her.

“For not being ready to tell everyone,” Athena blushed, embarrassed by the desire to keep her pregnancy secret.

“Athena, you have nothing to apologize for. I enjoy having this as our little secret,” Cullen quietly reassured her.

“It can’t stay secret much longer,” Athena knew that she would start showing soon. In fact, she was already noticing her waist becoming thicker.

“Whenever you are ready,” Cullen kissed her.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

I wanted to torment Curly so I started calling for a speech, which everyone joined in on. Cullen shook his head. The calling got louder as we directly disobeyed an order from the Commander. Athena had to almost yell to talk over the crowd, “They won’t stop until you give one.”

“I don’t like giving speeches,” Cullen groused.

“No? Then why do your soldiers get one everyday?” Athena teased.

“That’s different,” Curly blushed.

“Not really. On my name day I at least thanked them. Thank them."

“Have you become an expert on speeches now?” Cullen questioned. He knew Duchess hated giving speeches more than he did.

“I’ve had to give far too many of them,” Athena chuckled.

Cullen reluctantly let go of her hand and went up to the dais to speak: “Thank you for being her to celebrate my name day. I had decidedly different plans…”

“You can’t keep her all to yourself, Curly,” I loudly interrupted.

“I can try,” Curly was… Sarcastic! (This shit is weird.) 

I laughed, along with the crowd and he continued with his speech, “As Varric so aptly pointed out none of this would be possible without my wife, the Inquisitor.” He held out a hand for her to join him and Athena narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head. He smirked, “It’s true…”

Athena mouthed, blushing, “Your name day.”

“And you helped plan this… gathering,” Cullen looked pointedly at the royals, Nightingale, and Ruffles. 

“All she did was tell us what you didn’t like, and to keep it small. She left the rest of it up to us,” Leliana griped. 

“And here I thought the reason we weren’t having snails was because the first time Duchess had one she became violently ill,” I chuckled, “Thank you, Curly.”

“Snails?” Cullen asked Athena as he sat down beside her.

“You told me that you didn’t like them,” Athena was surprised that he didn’t remember telling her.

“I don’t. I’m wondering why I haven’t heard about you becoming ill by eating one…” He responded.

“Because we had barely said two words to each other at the time,” Athena remarked.

“How is it that you two don’t like snails?” Alistair asked.

“They’re disgusting, slimy, little worm like things,” Athena shuddered.

“They’re a delicacy,” Alistair sounded as though he couldn’t believe his ears.

“A delicacy is chocolate. Slimy little worms? No,” Athena was certain she knew what she was talking about.

“You’re not Fereldan,” Alistair teased.

“Then it’s a good thing I’m only Fereldan through marriage,” Athena smirked.

“Snail eating must be a noble thing,” Curly joined in the argument.

Athena looked at him with wide eyes. Even though she didn’t give a whit about her title, she didn’t deserve that! “Excuse me?”

“A Fereldan noble thing,” Cullen corrected himself.

Selene chuckled, “Snails are an acquired taste.”

“When Varric said that I was violently ill… That wasn’t an exaggeration. Cassandra actually threatened to carry me back to Haven if I didn’t go to a healer,” Athena said.

“Athena, what happened?” Cullen requested, but it came out as more of an order.

“We had gone to Redcliffe to meet with Fiona. We stopped for lunch, and they brought the snails out as an appetizer. Varric warned me to not eat it, but I had never heard of eating snails and I was curious. I had one and I couldn’t keep food down for days. Nothing washed the taste of that thing out of my mouth,” Athena shuddered again, remembering all too well how horribly that thing tasted.

“I wonder why Varric didn’t tell me that one,” Cullen raised an eyebrow at me.

“Because I thought you liked the infernal things and I was more worried that a snail had just killed off our only chance at survival,” I joined in hearing my name.

“There’s a proper way to make snails… I don’t think that happened in this instance,” Ruffles informed us. 

“It doesn’t matter, Josie. I’m never touching them again,” Athena noticed that Selene was falling asleep.

“If you ever come to Denerim, we’ll have a snail festival,” Alistair teased.

Athena shushed him which confused the king. Cullen explained softly, “I think the queen has had enough fun for the night.”

Alistair looked at his sleeping wife and murmured, “I guess she has.” He picked her up and carried her to their rooms.

Athena watched the royals leave and she looked a little worried. She turned to Curly, “Do not ever let me fall asleep like that.”

“I am not making any promises on that one,” he chuckled and then he kissed her. “As much fun as this has been, I would like to spend what’s left of my name day with just my wife.” 

Athena smiled as they said their goodbyes and went to their quarters. She briefly let go of her husband’s hand to grab a book off of her bookshelf. Blushing, Athena opened the book to reveal several letters. All of them addressed to Curly. She handed the stack to him and got several other hollowed out books. Each one containing a stack of letters. She said quietly, “You weren’t the only one that had hidden letters.”

“But you did write to me,” Cullen was in disbelief, looking at the several stacks of letters.

“These are the ones I was too embarrassed to send… And some are from when I was still at Ostwick,” Athena was blushing profusely.

Cullen put down the stack of letters he was holding and walked around her desk. He said quietly as he took both of her hands, “You didn’t have to do this.”

She kissed him, “I wanted to. Leliana doesn’t go through my things.”

“Thank you. Why do you have so many hollowed out books?” Cullen asked as they went to stand on the balcony. Athena stood in front of him and leaned her head back against his shoulder to look up at the stars. Cullen rested both of his hands on her almost nonexistant baby bump.

Athena smiled at the stars, “I learned at Ostwick to keep the things that I cared for hidden. For some reason, those that would go through my things never checked my books.”

“What were they looking for?”

“Anything to turn the knight-commander or first enchanter against me,” Athena quietly spoke. She felt him shake his head and then she gasped in delight as he started kissing her neck.

Cullen’s hands smoothed the fabric of her dress over where they had previously rested and he grabbed Athena’s hips to gently turned her to face him. Backing her up against the low wall he kissed her, passionately. She languidly wrapped her arm around his neck. When the kiss ended he said hoarsely, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she whispered, “happy name day.” They went in to their chambers to make love.


	45. Chapter 45

The Chargers and Bull came back from Haven with news of well armed bandits swearing allegiance to Kern and harassing the few people that still lived there. The bandits had said they would start killing people if Athena didn’t show. It took Athena, Josephine, and Leliana nearly a week to convince Curly to let Athena go back to Haven. The night before she left, he said, “I wish you would wait until I could come with you.”

“Cullen, I can’t. Haven has been terrorized by so much. I’m only going to be gone a couple days. Morrigan, my father, and Dorian are all coming with me. Do you really think that they’re going to allow me to do anything?” Athena looked up at him from where she had her head laying on his chest.

“Battles are unpredictable. They may not have any control over that,” Cullen took hold of her hand. It had been resting on his chest.

Athena took his hand and placed it where her belly was almost imperceptibly enlarged, “We will be fine,” she paused and spoke quietly, “When I come back, we can tell everyone.”

“Thank you, but this,” he flattened his hand against where she had placed it, “makes me want to command you to wait until I can come with you.”

“And how long would that be?” She understood his worry. If she was completely honest, she was worried, too.

“Another week, at least,” Cullen said quietly.

“The people of Haven have made great strides to rebuild. Considering I’m the one that destroyed it, I can’t let them suffer any more than they already have,” Athena said softly.

“Athena, the reason they are able to rebuild is because of you. You know what Corypheus would have done to them,” Cullen pulled himself up on an elbow.

“I know… And it doesn’t do any good to second guess the past…” Athena trailed off.

“But it’s hard to not wonder if there could have been a different way,” Cullen was understanding.

Athena smiled sadly. After a couple minutes of silence she teased, “There is one other reason this can’t wait…”

“Oh?” Cullen cocked an eyebrow.

“I won’t be able to fit in to my armor soon,” she grinned at him.

“Woman,” he growled pushing her down on the bed to make love.

The next morning Cullen was walking Athena to the gate and Duchess stopped to talk to me, “I know that you’re anxious to get back to Kirkwall, but will you wait to leave until I return?”

“I have no intention of leaving until we got in one last game of Wicked Grace,” I smiled at her.

“Maker’s breath!” Curly swore. 

Athena chuckled, “Thank you, Varric. I’ll see you in a couple days.”

At the gate they stopped to wait for Duchess’ companions on this trip. Cullen crushed her to him and almost begged, “Please protect yourself.”

“Cullen, I can’t breathe,” Athena’s voice was muffled by his arm.

“Oh, sorry,” Curly blushed and relaxed his hold a bit.

“I’ll be back in a couple days. I love you,” Athena said softly.

“I love you, too,” Cullen kissed her.

“I am quite excited to see my daughter in action,” Arthur walked up to the kissing couple.

“Uncle, that is not the thing to say to a man who is losing his wife for a couple days. Especially when we’re taking her in to certain danger,” Sparkler quipped.

“You’re not helping either,” Morrigan griped.

“I know,” Dorian smirked.

“Are you sure you don’t want to wait?” Cullen quietly asked his wife, very reluctant to let her go.

“I can’t,” Athena smiled sympathetically at him.

“I know,” Cullen sighed heavily.

“She will come to no harm, Commander,” Morrigan assured him.

“Thank you, Morrigan,” Curly stared in to Athena’s eyes.

“I’ll see you in a few days,” Athena said and kissed Cullen.

“I’ll be waiting,” Cullen returned. Athena blew him a kiss as she rode through the gates.

The few days passed, and Cullen paced the battlements waiting for Athena to return. When she hadn’t returned by sundown he went to Leliana, “Where is she?”

“I haven’t heard of anything not going according to what was planned,” Leliana remarked, “I’m sure that they’ll return in the morning. Is there something you aren’t telling me?”

“I’m just worried for her,” Cullen mumbled, hoping that Nightingale wouldn’t pick up that he was hiding something.

“That’s nothing new,” Leliana chuckled softly.

Cullen left and tried to get some work done. I found him in his office pacing, “Come have some drinks with Bull and I.”

“No,” Cullen flat out refused.

“It’s only drinks. Ruffles is working late tonight and she asked me to keep Tiny out of trouble. I could use the help,” I explained.

“Fine,” Curly grumped as he followed me out so we could all commiserate on missing our loves.

**

Athena wasn’t having an easy time of it as Morrigan in desperation, put a sleep spell on her so their captors would think that the Inquisitor was already unconscious. When Athena woke Morrigan shifted out of animal form to her true form. Morrigan whispered, “Shh. You and the baby are fine, I put a sleep spell on you so you weren’t attacked. Two men have taken us hostage. Their plan is to take you to Ostwick to get your phylactery.”

“They won’t find it there,” Athena said in a hushed whisper.

“Where is it?” Morrigan asked in the same tone.

“Skyhold,” Athena whispered. “It was kept at Fereldan’s circle tower before that.”

“Perfect,” Morrigan whispered. Morrigan was able to convince their captors to take them to the circle tower instead of Ostwick. 

Sparkler had been able to get away at Morrigan’s insistence and at sundown on the fifth day since they left, he ran in through the gates of Skyhold. Cullen was waiting…“What happened?” 

“We were overwhelmed. The only reason I’m here is because Morrigan helped me escape,” Dorian breathlessly explained.

“Where are they?” Cullen asked as Leliana came running up to them, just being informed herself.

“In a cave, right outside of Haven. Bernard and Kern are working together. They want Athena’s phylactery,” Dorian stopped Cullen before he could walk away, “Morrigan is protecting her.”

“Where are they headed?” Leliana questioned.

“Ostwick,” Dorian replied with dread deepening his voice.

Cullen closed his eyes. When he opened them he swore, “That’s a months long journey.”

“Why is the journey important?” Leliana wondered why the length of the journey mattered.

“You two weren’t kidding when you said no one knew,” Sparkler gasped.

“Know what?” Leliana was getting extremely irritated.

“Athena’s with child, Leliana,” Cullen almost whispered, afraid of who might be listening.

“She’s what?! And you didn’t think to tell me?” Leliana came close to shouting.

“I am not discussing this with you here,” Cullen stormed off to his office to get Athena’s phylactery. 

Dorian ran after him, “Cullen, does Morrigan know?”

“Yes,” Cullen answered as he unlocked a desk drawer.

“Then they won’t be going to Ostwick. When we were overwhelmed, Morrigan put a sleep spell on Athena so she wouldn’t be hurt. You have to trust that she will be all right,” Dorian tried to reassure him.

“When did you leave them?” Cullen asked as he felt around the locked drawer for a button to release the hidden compartment (dwarven made desk.) 

“Around sunrise. I doubt that they’re still there though,” Dorian answered.

“Would you be able to draw a map of the cave you were taken to? Also tell Darius he’s in command. I need to get Varric and Bull,” Cullen reached in to the hidden compartment in his desk to get Athena’s phylactery.

“I’m coming with you,” Dorian clearly stated.

“I can’t ask that of you,” Cullen locked his desk and headed for the door only to find Leliana blocking it.

“Do you really think I’m going to sit here while my cousin and uncle are still in the clutches of evil people? I’m coming with you,” Dorian stated again.

“No one is going anywhere,” Leliana crossed her arms with her feet spread apart. Cullen took one look at her and headed for another door, “Commander, you won’t be saving anyone if you get yourself killed. Let’s plan a strategy tonight and at first light we will leave. It will also give us time for my agents to get back to me.”

“Where were your agents yesterday or the day before, Leliana? I already have a plan, I’m going to use Athena’s phylactery to find her. Then, I’m going to kill her captors and anyone else that decides to keep me from my wife. I’m going to bring her home,” Cullen opened the door and left, knowing that Nightingale wouldn’t have an answer for him.

“Dorian, how far along is Athena?” Leliana inquired.

“Threeish months? I didn’t get to tell the Commander this but Arthur is injured and Evelyn was dead when I left,” Dorian explained.

“All the more reason to not rush in to this, yes?” Leliana rhetorically asked. She knew there would be no convincing Cullen to not rush in to this.

“I don’t think the Maker could stop the Commander right now,” Dorian answered it anyway, and chased after Curly. Who instead of coming to us and asking for help, started shouting in the courtyard.

“Curly?” I asked as I walked up to him and then I saw Duchess’ phylactery and said, “Shit, I’ll get Bianca.”

I’m not sure if he heard me as he kept calling for Bull, who showed up and remarked, “I never figured you for the bellowing type.”

By this time Sparkler had caught up with him, “The Inquisitor has been taken hostage, Bull.”

“I’ll get the Chargers,” Tiny bellowed for Krem.

Leliana had also decided to come along, “This is incredibly foolish, Commander.”

“I know what I’m doing, Leliana,” Cullen stated as he mounted up.

“You don’t know what you’ll be facing,” Leliana argued.

“Bernard’s a blood Mage, I know what they’re capable of. Kern isn’t a mage and Tommy could win easily against him. The only unknown for me is where we’ll find them,” Cullen tapped the reins to get his horse to move. He had every intention of getting to Athena before they reached their destination.

“What of their followers? We don’t even know how they were overwhelmed,” Leliana shouted as Curly was far ahead of the rest of us.

Dorian put up a wall of fire in front of Cullen to slow him down, and said calmly, “You’re not going to be able to find the cave without me and I refuse to save my cousin just so she can come back to mourn the loss of her husband.” Cullen snarled but slowed down enough so that Dorian could keep pace. Dorian answered Leliana’s question, “When the bandits attacked us we had decided to surround Athena. It wasn’t the greatest of ideas as that was when Bernard used blood magic to lock us all in a magical cage.”

“I’m sure Athena was thrilled with you leaving your senses. Commander, we don’t know what direction they’ll be going in….” Leliana made a futile attempt to get him to reconsider.

“We don’t need to. The closer I get to Athena her phylactery will glow brighter. I want to see what happened at the cave,” Cullen growled out, desperately holding on to his anger so he didn’t give in to fear that the love of his life and mother of his unborn child had been harmed.

They reached the cave right before sunrise and true to what Curly said the phylactery started glowing brighter. When he turned away from the trail, the phylactery dimmed. We also found Evelyn’s body in the cave along with Leliana’s scouts’ bodies. 

Nightingale sent off a message to have her agents take care of the bodies. Leliana also said, “We should stop for a bit to give at least the horses a break.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow and paced off. It was my turn to talk him down from leaving us behind, “Athena’s a smart lady, Curly. She will find a way to survive and possibly even beat them until we get to her.”

He was barely keeping it together, “Thank you, Varric.”

Leliana came over to us, “Can the Commander and I have a moment, Varric?” I nodded and went back over to the others. Leliana watched him pace for a bit and then asked, “Why wasn’t I told that Athena was with child?”

“Because she wanted to keep it secret in case this one was lost too,” Cullen said hoarsely.

Leliana closed her eyes against the sting of tears when she opened them she said, “I am sorry. Who else knows? And when was she planning on telling the rest of us?”

“Dorian, Arthur, Mia, and Morrigan. She said that we would tell everyone when she came back from Haven. I should have made her wait until I could go with her,” Cullen chastised himself.

“You couldn’t have known this would happen. And it would destroy Athena if she lost you,” Leliana responded to assuage his guilt. 

“We would have found a way out,” Cullen’s voice was thick with emotion.

“We’re going to find her. You should try and get some rest,” Leliana suggested and walked off to her own bedroll. Cullen sort of listened and sat at the edge of the makeshift camp, as soon as his eyes shut, his dreams started in full force…

**

“No, I won’t play with his dreams like that,” Athena’s refusal was hushed and she had tears in her eyes.

“’Tis not playing with his dreams if you are merely informing him that you are well and where we are. Your husband deserves to know that you are well.” Morrigan paused and then slightly nodded at Duchess’ belly, “You already have a link to him.”

“Why can’t we just fight them and go back to Skyhold?” Athena watched their captors pace and argue.

“What of your father? He is still unconscious,” Morrigan watched the same thing as Athena.

“He shouldn’t have attacked them,” Athena choked back tears as she looked at her father. She shuddered as she remembered her father using his Templar abilities to weaken the cage they were in and attacking their captors. Morrigan and Athena had been blasted back by the force of Bernard’s magic. When they got up, the cage had been reset and Arthur had been stabbed with an enchanted and poisoned dagger. Athena healed the wound, but he wouldn’t wake.

“Let me put you to sleep. Find your husband, let him know where we are,” Morrigan implored her.

Athena sighed and closed her eyes as if going to sleep and whispered, “Let’s get this over with.” Morrigan cast her spell and Duchess found Curly in his dreams. She called softly, “Cullen, it’s Athena. I am so sorry to do this. I’m fine, the baby is fine. We’re being held at the Fereldan Circle tower. I love you…”

Cullen woke with a start, grabbed the nearest horse and started riding. Leliana, Dorian, Bull, and I followed. The Chargers were left to clean up camp. We stood on Lake Calenhad’s docks with Duchess’ phylactery glowing ever brighter. Dorian went over to speak to the ferryman. Leliana asked quietly, “Did you hear from Athena?”

“In a way,” Cullen thumbed the phylactery, waiting impatiently.

“What did she say?”

“That she and the baby are fine and that they’re being held in the circle tower,” he stared, unseeing, out over the lake. Dorian got passage for them to go across. Cullen paced the entire time and didn’t say a word. 

After we docked he drew his sword, ready for anyone. It was eerily quiet, I drew Bianca in response to the quiet and we made our way to the door. The door was locked. Curly kicked it open.

“That was unwise, Commander,” Leliana chastised.

“They’re holding her in the harrowing chamber,” he informed us, not responding to Nightingale… Frankly, I’m not sure he heard her. We picked our way around the broken door and went floor by floor without anyone or anything attacking us.

“This is weird,” I commented to fill the eery silence. Everyone but Curly agreed, I doubt he heard me. We got to the Templar quarters and we were attacked by humans that were turned into… Something… Whatever it was, they weren’t human anymore. 

The sounds of battle reached those in the Harrowing chamber. The captors ran out to see what was going on. Morrigan smiled sadistically, “Tis time.” Athena put a barrier over all of them as Morrigan readied her staff.

“You’ll never take them alive!” They heard Bernard scream repeatedly. 

Bernard was silenced after they heard a low, menacing growl of, “You’ll die first.”

With Bernard’s death the magical cage broke. Morrigan ran out to join the battle and ordered Duchess to protect her father. Once everyone but Kern was dead, Cullen ran to his wife and crushed her in his embrace. He choked out hoarsely, “Thank the Maker you’re all right.” 

Athena just wrapped her arm around him tighter, sobbing in to his shoulder. Relieved to be in her husband’s arms again.

“Why don’t you and the Inquisitor go somewhere private while we deal with this one?” Leliana suggested as she pointed an arrow at Kern.

“No,” Athena wiped her tears away after being placed back on her feet and turning to face her remaining captor, “Why is my phylactery so important to you?”

“To command the Inquisition,” Kern snorted as if the reason was obvious.

“You mean this phylactery?” Cullen showed them the vial he was holding and handed it to Athena. 

Athena dropped it on the floor, destroying it, “No one controls me.” Athena looked to Leliana, “When you’re done questioning him, kill him.” 

Cullen wondered what had happened to make his wife so hard hearted, but right now all he wanted to do was get his wife away from her captor. Morrigan and I stayed with Leliana to help with the interrogation. Dorian and Cullen both agreed, much to Athena’s chagrin, that Sparkler should be left to care for Arthur. 

Cullen and Athena walked through the tower until they came to the room they had slept in before. Cullen hastily took off his armor and pulled his wife into his arms, and with a voice choking with emotion, “Never again are you to go off without me by your side.”

Athena closed her eyes as they overflowed with tears, “I’m sorry that I had to play with your dreams.”

“How else were you to let me know that you were safe?” Cullen asked quietly, not blaming her in the least. Athena remained silent, which worried Cullen more, “Athena, what happened?”

“Bernard’s “tranquility” was a ruse. He was a Venatori agent and that is how he and Kern met and…” Athena choked back a sob, “They had tortured Evelyn so much that she died from her injuries.” Athena shuddered.

Cullen put a gentle finger to her lips and suggested, “Why don’t we sit down first?” He led her to the edge of the bed and they sat. He put an arm around Duchess and pulled her tight against him. She leaned against him for support and from exhaustion, he noticed, “How long has it been since you slept?”

“Cullen?” Athena looked down, really not wanting to argue with him.

“Yes?”

“Just let me be with you for right now?” She begged, her violet eyes showing the heartbreak she endured over the past several days.

He kissed her and whispered, “Of course.” 

“Thank you,” Athena said softly as she put her head on his shoulder and took his hand that was by her hip and held it over the still very tiny baby bump. Tears quickly sprang to Cullen’s eyes in relief that both of them were all right. 

Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears as they rolled, unchecked, down her cheeks. Within a couple minutes she was asleep. Cullen felt her relax and then slouch. He gently picked her up and laid her on the bed. As soon as he laid her down there was a soft knock on the door. Cullen growled low at the interruption. When he opened the door he saw Morrigan, “Athena is sleeping I hope?”

“She just fell asleep. How long has she gone without sleep?” Cullen was whispering, terrified he would wake his wife.

“She hasn’t slept since we came to the circle. Even when I would put a sleep spell on her, it would only last an hour,” Morrigan answered. 

“What happened?” Cullen was desperate to know how, or if, he could help Athena get through this.

“Bernard had control of one of the scouts and they led us to the cave. They said that the Inquisitor was needed to help a hurt child. Then the bandits came out of the shadows, surrounding and overwhelming us. I put a sleep spell on Athena so they wouldn’t attack her, and that is when Bernard put a cage around us.” Morrigan explained.

“A cage?” Cullen shuddered, remembering all too well what it felt like to be caged and helpless.

“Once Athena woke he threatened to kill Evelyn if Athena didn’t comply to being held captive. He had taken the cage down to move us. When we got here, Arthur used his Templar abilities to weaken the cage and tried to attack them… It did not end well for him. Athena healed the injuries she could see, but he’s been unconscious for better part of the week.”

“Why did he have to threaten Evelyn?” He asked.

“When Athena woke she started to dispel the cage, and that is when he threatened Evelyn, not that it stopped them from killing her,” Morrigan paused, “on the way here we had paused to rest. Athena fell asleep and Bernard noticed. I believe he did something to her, possibly more than once, but she refuses to tell me what. After, she refused to sleep, I even tried to force her by casting a sleep spell on her but she blocked it.”

“Maker, no,” Cullen breathed out, thinking the worst, “more than once?”

“The first night we were here, Athena cast a sleep spell on me. She was alone with them for about four hours,” Morrigan quietly spoke.

Cullen closed his eyes against the unpleasant thoughts running through his head. When he opened them again, “Dorian said that you helped him escape.”

“Help? If he meant ordering him to go back to Skyhold to get you as help, then, aye, I helped him. Bernard had removed the cage and was tying us to the cart to move. He was the only one that hadn’t been tied up… A spider did scare our captors though,” Morrigan smirked, “maybe he meant that?”

“Did you… change form?” Curly remembered that Morrigan could take on the forms of animals.

“At that point, no. When were initially caged, I assumed a cat form in hopes to stay with Athena in case they didn’t take Dorian or Arthur with her,” Morrigan’s voice was still hushed.

“Thank you, Morrigan. I’m sure that you’re anxious to get some rest,” Cullen said softly.

Morrigan nodded, “Do not hesitate to get me if Athena has need of me.”

“I won’t,” Cullen closed the door as Morrigan left. He sighed shakily and returned to his sleeping wife. Curly had no intention of falling asleep, but the desire to hold her was all consuming. When he had Athena in his arms he let a few tears of guilt and relief fall, and then he went off to sleep too. 

Cullen woke in the middle of the night with a start. Athena was missing from the bed, which sent him in to a panic. Cullen jumped out of bed and he grabbed his sword. Athena heard the scraping noise of sword against scabbard and said softly, “Cullen, I’m right here.”

He breathed a sigh of relief and lit a candle so he could see where she was, “How long have you been awake?”

Athena was sitting in one of the darkest corners of the room. She squinted against the candle light, “Not long.”

Cullen walked over to her and sat the candle on the table next to her. Crouching in front of her and with a gentle voice, he said, “Long enough for you to move across the room and sit here for a while. Do you want to talk?”

Athena closed her eyes against unbidden tears, “They killed Leliana’s agents. Their followers either became possessed by demons or were turned in to creatures where nothing remained except a desire to kill. All the lies, the supposed betrothals, the deaths, everything Kern did was ordered by Bernard. He thought that surrounding me with death and heartache would make me grow cold…” 

“What woke you?” Cullen asked quietly, changing the subject. What she was talking about could wait until daytime where it seemed a little further removed.

“Leliana knocked on the door to let us know that Kern was dead.”

“Why didn’t you wake me?” Cullen asked gently.

“Leliana had told me that you had barely slept since I didn’t come back as planned,” her voice was quiet and racked with guilt.

“Sweet Andraste, she shouldn’t have told you that,” he was now irate with Leliana.

“She cares about you, and she was upset because I kept apologizing,” Athena smiled a little with a slight blush.

“What were you apologizing for?” Cullen stood and reached out a hand for her to join him. She accepted.

As they walked back to the bed, Athena explained, “For not telling her about being with child again. She told me that she understood why, but she would have never sent me to Haven had she known. I told her that it was better that I went now than in four months and Haven was being destroyed again. Investigating Haven was the easy part.”

“It’s still nothing to apologize for. You have every right to tell whomever you wish, whenever you wish,” Cullen softly assured her as they laid back down on the bed together.

“I wasn’t apologizing for that. She’s my friend. Leliana should have heard it from me, or both of us.”

“If Dorian hadn’t said that they were planning to take you to Ostwick, she still wouldn’t know,” Cullen defended himself.

“It’s all right,” Athena sighed heavily, “I know I should try to sleep…”

“But you can’t,” Cullen was hesitant to bring their conversation back around to what Duchess had had to endure, but, he had to know, “Morrigan told me about some of what happened.”

“When?” She laid her head on his chest.

“After you fell asleep…” Cullen paused and asked, barely above a whisper, “What did Bernard do to you?”

Athena laid quietly for a long while thinking over all that had transpired over the past several days and then her tears began to fall again, “He tried to use my dreams against me at first…”

“But,” Cullen gently encouraged.

“He couldn’t and it made him terribly angry. The creatures you fought were their followers. He… experimented on them in front of us. They were human… once,” Athena’s voice was soft as her tears kept falling.

Cullen held her tighter to him, “Why did you put Morrigan to sleep?”

“He kept leering at her,” Athena shuddered at the memory. Cullen responded by pulling her tighter against him. When Duchess was ready, she continued, “I also knew Morrigan wouldn’t tolerate it and my father was unconscious... I couldn’t risk anyone else getting hurt.”

“Morrigan said that you had started to dispel the cage when you were initially attacked… Why didn’t you do that here?”

“I tried as often as I felt it was safe to do so, nothing worked. Maybe my father did something to it by using his Templar abilities? All I know is that afterward, we couldn’t get out and they couldn’t get in,” Athena shifted to sit up so she could look at her husband.

“If Bernard couldn’t get through the cage. What happened while Morrigan was asleep?” More than ever, Cullen was wishing he had been with her. He had never heard of a Templar doing such a thing.

“Bernard said that Brenna was his daughter. He told me about all the spells that he would cast on Evelyn. He tried to cast spells on me when I was with them too, but they never worked on me. He told me of how he would kill the animals I brought home… essentially his life story and how he joined the Venatori.” Athena shuddered.

“You just talked?” Cullen sat up as well. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of what she was telling him.

“Talking is not the right word for it… He yelled, I tried to act as though I wasn’t listening.”

“If all you did was talk, listen, and thwart them… Why didn’t you sleep?” Cullen was bewildered. He was ecstatic that she wasn’t tortured, but why would she refuse to sleep?

Athena looked away quickly from his brown eyes, so he couldn’t see the pain or that they were filling with tears again. Cullen gently placed his fingers on her chin and had her look at him again. He slowly shook his head and said softly, “You never have to hide from me.”

“Every time I tried to sleep -or was forced to sleep- I would dream of you.” Athena stopped to wipe at the tears that were streaming down from her violet eyes and to choke back a sob, “You would come to save me and then I would watch you fall… And no matter what I tried to do, I couldn’t get to you. By the time I could get to you, you were dead…” Athena stopped to regain her composure, “The last time I had dreams of someone I loved dying… My mother died.”

Cullen pulled her in to his arms and held her. He whispered, fiercely, “When I married you I made a promise to you that we would grow old together. I have every intention of honoring that promise. Unless your dreams show me with white hair and a cane, they are just dreams.”

“How can you be so certain of that?” She asked, amazed.

“Because I am.” Curly kissed her and was rudely interrupted by her stomach rumbling, “When was the last time you ate?”

“I had brought along some cookies and herbs from Skyhold in my satchel.”

“How long did they last?” 

“Until last eve.”

Cullen sighed in relief, “They weren’t meals but at least it was something. I doubt that there’s anything left to eat here.”

“Cullen, it’s all right. I’m assuming we’re leaving in the morning?” Duchess’ voice trembled with hope.

“Yes, I am getting you far away from this place.” He answered with absolute certainty. Athena yawned then and Cullen half smiled, “I think you and I should try and get some more sleep.”

She nodded in agreement and assumed her favorite position of laying on Curly’s chest so she could hear his heart beat.

**

A few days after returning to Skyhold, our lovers decided to join the rest of us for breakfast as the royals were going back to Denerim that day and that was when they announced that Athena was with child again. After the rounds of congratulations Athena noticed my smirk, “You’re very smug today, Varric.”

I winked at her, “That’s because you’re telling me something I already know.”

“How?” Duchess was mystified by my powers of deduction.

“I figured it out when you two got officially married,” my smirk grew.

“That doesn’t say how,” Leliana was miffed with herself. She should have figured out before anyone.

“Curly is usually pretty gentle with Duchess, but he was extra gentle that day. Add that to the change in eating and sleeping habits, and that he was going with her on most of her trips…” I chuckled.

“Varric, some times you make a better spy than Leliana,” Cullen chuckled.

“Commander!” Leliana and Selene said together in shock.

“He only has himself to blame for me knowing what’s going on with Duchess. I’ve been her bodyguard since their first awkward hello,” I exaggerated… A bit.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Athena asked me, turning my reminiscing back to the present.

“If what I was thinking was correct, it was your news to share. If I was wrong, I didn’t want to add to your heartache,” I confessed. 

Tears sprang into Athena’s eyes, “And you wonder why I say that you’re my best friend.”

“Don’t, Duchess… It’s not a pretty sight seeing a dwarf cry,” I said, trying to ignore the lump in my throat.

After we finished eating we went to say goodbye to the royals. Morrigan and Kieran were going with them. Morrigan hugged Athena and said, “I should stay.”

“Morrigan, go. I found you the first time,” Athena chuckled.

“Am I dreaming?” Alistair asked in disbelief.

“Why would you ask such a thing?” I questioned.

“Morrigan is hugging people,” Alistair quipped.

“The Inquisitor is a dear friend and she has been through an ordeal. Is it so wrong that I worry for her?” Morrigan was indignant.

“By the blood of Andraste, Inquisitor, what have you done to Morrigan?” Alistair was shocked to hear Morrigan care for someone other than herself or Kieran.

“I should turn him into a toad and I should stay,” Morrigan murmured. 

Athena chuckled and shook her head, “Go. You’re doing this for Kieran, remember?”

“My son loves it here,” Morrigan remarked.

“Who’s going to take care of Selene?” Athena reminded her of the other reason she was going.

“I’ve never been one to be self sacrificing,” she groused.

“I do a fine job of taking care of my wife,” Alistair griped.

“When she allows you,” Athena said so softly that only those standing closest to her heard her. One of those people was Morrigan. 

Morrigan laughed, “I’m going to miss you.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you genuinely laugh,” Alistair wondered at his nemesis’ laughter. It truly was a lovely, lilting sound. Granted, Morrigan, had nothing on Duchess’ laugh… But then I may be biased.

“The Inquisitor and I share a similar sense of humor,” Morrigan said imperially.

“Alistair, let it go,” Selene said from the carriage and then inhaled sharply.

Morrigan and Athena looked at each other. Athena smiled sweetly, “I wish you the best of luck, Morrigan.”

“Fool woman,” Morrigan grumbled.

“At least she’s doing what she desires?” Athena tried to find a positive side to the royals and Morrigan leaving. Morrigan growled in response and Athena chuckled.

“And what is it that you desire?” Cullen asked wrapping his arms around his lady’s growing waist.

She leaned back against him and sighed, “To hide behind Skyhold’s walls for a while and for my father to wake.”

Morrigan heard what she said, “I expect to hear from you, Inquisitor.”

“You will, Morrigan,” Athena bit her lip as a mischievous light lit her violet eyes, “Don’t turn the King in to anything the Queen can’t love.”

Morrigan laughed as she and Kieran readied to ride out. Alistair whined, “Heyyy!”

After the royal entourage left, Athena yawned, “I think I’m going to check on my father and go back to bed.”

“You didn’t sleep well?” Cullen was worried. Athena shook her head in answer, which had Cullen chastising her, “You should be waking me when you get up in the middle of the night.”

“Cullen, if I woke you every time I woke, you wouldn’t be getting any sleep,” Athena said as they walked back in to the keep.

“Why do you think that?”

“Because I’m still waking about once an hour. Most of the time I can fall right back to sleep, other times…” Duchess trailed off.

“Is that what happened last night?” 

“Yes,” She answered as Curly opened the door to the stairs leading to their chambers.

“Then at least wake me when you can’t get back to sleep?” Cullen requested, “You don’t have to face the nightmares alone.”

“You’ve been sleeping so peacefully lately. I don’t want to disturb that,” Athena’s guilt was evident. Cullen struggles almost nightly with horrible nightmares, surely she could handle a few weeks without needing help?

Cullen stopped before they reached the room where her father was and took hold of her hand, “Athena, the only reason I get a decent night’s sleep at all is because of you. I also have some experience with sleepless nights because of horrible dreams…”

“It isn’t that I don’t want to tell you. I just wish they would stop and talking about them...” She trailed off as Cullen let her go so she could walk over to where Arthur was laying.

“Makes them seem real,” Cullen smiled sadly at her. 

Athena nodded as she checked to see if Arthur was still breathing, which he was…barely, “What are your plans for the day?”

“I have a couple meetings, but they should be done by lunch time. Do you have any other plans besides being with Arthur and sleeping?”

Athena shrugged and sat in one of the chairs beside the bed, “I have been told by Leliana and Josephine that they are handling everything… which leaves me with a lot of free time.”

“They’re just concerned for you,” Cullen sat beside her.

“I know, but all this does is leave me alone with my thoughts, and I wonder if there was something different that could have been done. What mistakes did I make?” Athena sighed, not giving voice to the fear that she was losing her father.

“Try and get some rest. We’ll see about getting your mind off of things this afternoon,” Cullen kissed her. Athena placed her hand over her expanding belly. Cullen noticed, “Athena?”

“I felt our baby move,” she smiled at him. 

His smile rivaled the sun, “Maybe I should cancel my meetings and spend the day with you.”

Athena shook her head at him, “I still want to try to sleep after I sit with my dad for a bit.”

Cullen bent down to kiss her again before he left. Athena did as she said, sitting with Arthur for about an hour before seeking her own bed. She laid on her side with a smile that wouldn’t quit, her hand caressing the spot where she had felt the baby move, and closed her eyes for the first peaceful sleep she’s had in weeks.

**

Cullen made his way to his office where Darius was waiting for him. Darius noticed the grin and commented, “You’re in high spirits today.”

“I am,” Curly opened the door with his grin widening.

“Care to let me in on what has my Commander so happy?”

“Athena felt the baby move for the first time today,” Cullen answered, “What do you have for me?”

“That’s great news. Nothing of anything major to report except that the soldiers are wondering where their Commander has been hiding of late,” Darius remarked.

“I’ve never trained with them daily,” Cullen perused the reports that were on his desk.

“Ah, but you would train with them at least once a week, for an entire day,” Darius smirked.

Cullen sighed, “I’ll train with them until lunch.”

“Only until lunch?”

“I promised Athena that we would do something to take her mind off of what happened. She’s also worried that Arthur isn’t going to wake up.”

“Why isn’t she working?” Darius was worried for Duchess.

“Leliana and Josephine won’t let her.” Curly put his papers down, “Let’s go. I think hitting something would be good for me.”

Darius chuckled and then challenged, “I don’t think you have it in you to hit hard today… You’re too happy.”

Cullen growled as they left his office, “You and I will be having a sparring match before the day is through.”

“That’s the Commander I know and love.”

“Ha ha,” Curly remarked without humor, and went out to train with the soldiers.

Athena groaned upon waking as someone was pounding on her door. Stretching, she called out, “I’ll be right there.” She got up to put her robe on and went to the door. Opening it, she saw Dorian looking panicked, “Dorian, what’s wrong?”

“The healer was told to not disturb you, so he came to get me,” Dorian paused, not sure how to tell his cousin that her father, the father she just recently came to know, was dying.

Athena waited with baited breath for Sparkler to continue. She finally grew impatient, “Dorian…”

“It’s Arthur, the healer said that he’s dying,” Dorian choked out.

Athena rushed by him in a flash to get to her father. She ran to Arthur’s bed and took hold of his hand, begging him to wake. With tears streaming down her face she cried, “Please don’t leave me!”

Dorian took one of the healer’s people aside and told them to get Cullen. He then asked the healer who told him that the Inquisitor should not be disturbed. The healer showed Dorian the note he received, and it was signed by Curly. Dorian was confounded, and murmured, “This doesn’t make any sense.”

Cullen bounded up the stairs to be with Athena, he was not pleased to see Dorian in his way. Cullen grumbled at him and went to move past Sparkler but he held out a hand holding the note, “Explain this?”

Cullen ripped the paper from Dorian’s fingers and after quickly scanning it he crumpled it in his fist, “I wrote that the first night we were back from the tower. I never gave it to anyone though.”

“Did the servant tell you?” Dorian watched Cullen’s fist clench and unclench around the crumpled note.

Cullen gave a brief nod and then asked, “Does Athena…?”

“I told her what the healer told me,” Sparkler replied softly.

Athena had pulled a chair close to Arthur’s bed to sit, unaware of anything around her except her father. She whispered as she watched her father’s chest barely move, “I healed all of your injuries. Why won’t you wake up?”

Cullen walked slowly over to his wife. He gently laid a hand on her shoulder and said her name softly. He took every effort to not startle her and still she jumped.

When she had recovered she laid bare her soul, “I don’t understand. I healed him after he was attacked, he should be talking and walking. Not laying here… Not like this… He shouldn’t be at death’s door.”

Cullen moved a chair to sit beside her and put his arm around her, knowing that he had no answers for her. Dorian joined them and they waited with an occasional sniffle or broken sob breaking the somber silence. At dusk Cullen decided to stop their vigil so they could at least eat. Athena fought him on it, “I’m not leaving my father!”

“Athena, it’s only to eat, and then we’ll come right back,” Cullen tried the compromise route.

“Listen to him, Cousin,” Sparkler interjected quietly.

“No!” Athena looked away from her husband to her father’s motionless face, wishing she could get Arthur to wake by sheer force of will.

“If you don’t want to eat to keep your strength up… at least eat for our child,” Cullen was torn between begging her to come or carrying her. He decided that Duchess was stubborn enough to not eat at all if he carried her.

“I cannot leave him alone, not like this,” Athena’s voice broke and tears were once again flowing from her violet eyes.

“I’ll stay with him. I won’t leave until you come back,” Dorian offered. Cullen’s look of relief and gratitude almost brought a sardonic grin to Sparkler’s lips… It was a thought he promised himself that he would enjoy later.

“Are you certain, Dorian?” Athena kept glancing behind her to make sure that Arthur was still breathing.

“He is my uncle,” Dorian half smiled, hoping to see something of a glimmer of a smile out of Duchess. Unfortunately, he was unsuccessful, “Go, Athena, if anything changes, you’ll be the first to know.”

Athena hesitated and then sighed dejectedly, taking hold of her husband’s hand so they could go eat. They ate in silence, everyone giving them a wide berth as everyone was told that Arthur was dying. Athena barely touched anything, but she did try. Cullen finished quickly and grabbed some chocolate chip cookies with the hope he could get Duchess to eat later. And they went back to their vigil.

Athena took up her former spot of holding Arthur’s now cold and clammy hand. Cullen beside her and Sparkler across from them. Cullen wondered why Dorian wasn’t leaving to eat and asked about it.

“I’m not hungry,” Dorian half smiled.

“Neither was I,” Athena quietly complained, never looking away from her father.

“I’m not pregnant,” Sparkler reminded her which Duchess scoffed at.

Cullen shook his head at them, and decided to change the subject, “I owe Darius a sparring match.”

“You’re telling me this because…” Dorian trailed off, wondering what Curly’s aim was.

Arthur started coughing and Athena shushed them as she stood by her father’s bed. She placed her head on his chest to listen to his heartbeat. She closed her eyes against the sting of tears as it was very weak. 

Cullen took the few steps to his wife and pulled her into his arms once she stood. Athena cried out, “He shouldn’t be like this! I healed him!”

Dorian gasped, “I thought you knew! I mean, you were asleep when it happened, but I thought he would tell you!”

“Dorian, explain,” Cullen ordered, not releasing his sobbing wife.

“They had a bucket full of raw lyrium. They had put it down beside Arthur… When Bernard went back for it, the container was empty. He must have…”

“Drank it,” Cullen finished for Dorian as he looked over Duchess’ head to see his father in law. “It’s why he won’t wake up.”

“Noooo,” Athena moaned, crying even harder.

Cullen tightened his grip on her and explained further, “Because of his Templar abilities, he had built up a resistance to lyrium. It was the reason he had been able to fight back.”

“And with the blood magic being used,” Dorian said softly.

“The odds were too great. Even if he hadn’t tried to fight, ingesting raw lyrium is a death sentence,” Cullen’s tone was gentle, but now he was quite angry at Arthur for the pain Athena was in.

Athena looked up at her husband with her violet eyes swimming in tears, “I can’t save him, can I?”

“I am sorry, Athena. I’ve heard stories of people ingesting raw lyrium, they never end well. The fact that Arthur is still breathing says much about your healing powers,” Cullen gently pushed her heavy hair back from her face and wiped away the tears staining her cheeks. He tenderly and briefly kissed Duchess and then urged her to sit back down.

Hours went by as they watched Arthur sleep without change. Cullen noticed that Athena was starting to droop, unable to fight exhaustion anymore. He said softly, “Why don’t you go to bed and get a few hours rest? I’ll stay with him.”

Athena shook her head, not trusting her voice as her eyes filled with tears again. Cullen sighed, even though Duchess’ heart was breaking he was well aware of the stubborn set to his wife’s jaw and tried a different tact, “Then at least go for a walk, stretch your legs a bit. If the worst…” He paused and tilted her chin to look at him, “I don’t want you to be too stiff to move.”

Athena understood what Cullen was trying to say, and appreciated that he left the decision to her. She nodded and walked up and through their quarters, took a quick garderobe break, and was back down in ten minutes. Dorian had found a chess board and tried to entice Cullen into playing, he saw Athena first and shook his head at her, but said nothing.

Cullen had paced away from the stairwell. When he turned he saw Duchess and sighed, “I had hoped you would have taken a longer walk.”

“I can’t,” Athena rasped out.

“I know,” Cullen walked over to Athena and hugged her, understanding her inability to be away, but worried for her and their baby. 

They sat back down and waited, silently, until a soft knock could be heard at the door. Athena moved as though she would answer it. Cullen shook his head at her, and motioned for her to stay sitting. He went to answer the door and saw Nightingale standing on the other side, “I am sorry to bother you, but, there’s been a development.”

Cullen crossed his arms and leaned back against the closed door as he waited for Leliana to continue. He was quite irked at being pulled away from Duchess, so this had better be good.

“Hawke and Anders…” Leliana wasn’t allowed to finish.

“No,” he stated mulishly.

“You do not know what I am going to say.”

“Athena is barely a week back from being abducted. Her father is dying and there is absolutely nothing she can do to help him. And you think I want to hear what the champion and that madman is up to?!” Cullen seethed.

“Why isn’t Athena healing him?” It was rare that Leliana didn’t know something, but Cullen was in no mood to indulge in it.

“She’s tried, several times. But he took raw lyrium, there is nothing she can do for him except watch him die.” Cullen had taken to pacing.

“When did he take it?”

“Before Dorian could escape… It’s a miracle he survived this long. Whatever Hawke and Anders want can wait,” Cullen ordered.

Leliana nodded and melted into the inky blackness of the hallway. Cullen knew he was too agitated to be of any comfort to Duchess so he went and walked the battlements for the better part of an hour.

**

Athena had fallen sleep leaning on her father's bed and holding his hand. She dreamt of her wedding at Skyhold and how her father had spoke. Her dream viciously turned sour to when they were abducted. She heard Arthur speak, sounding far away, “I love you. Goodbye…”

Athena gasped awake and sat up. Arthur’s breathing was ragged, coming in short bursts. She laid her head on his chest to hear his heartbeat and it was very faint. Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears and lifted her head, choking out, “I love you, too.”

Arthur’s tortured breathing eased and slowed to a stop. If Duchess was given to flights of fancy, she would have swore that she heard him sigh in relief at her words. As he breathed his last Dorian woke from a fitful sleep and Cullen returned. They asked in unison, “Athena?”

She shook her head, tears spilling from her violet eyes, as her gaze locked onto her husband and refused to leave. Cullen walked swiftly over to her and wrapped her in his arms, reprimanding himself for leaving her, “I am so sorry.”

Athena was crying too hard to respond. Dorian saluted his uncle and let Curly know that he would see them on the morrow. Cullen nodded as he and Athena sat down again. He held her until she cried herself to sleep. Cullen then carried her up to bed, gently loosening her dress (he didn’t take it off for fear of waking her), took off her shoes, and pulled the covers over her. 

Before Cullen joined Athena in bed, he went back downstairs and covered Arthur completely before he had the body removed. On the morrow, after everyone got some rest, they would discuss what to do with the body. Cullen dropped into bed beside his wife and pulled Athena tight against him, placing his hands over her growing belly. As he drifted off to sleep, he whispered to Athena how much he loved her.

**

A few days later they had a funeral for Arthur. Dorian gave a beautiful speech before they lit the pyre. Athena stood next to Cullen, all emotion gone. 

Cullen had his arm around Athena’s shoulders. For the first couple days, all she did was cry, then her tears slowed to when she would think of him or someone would inadvertently say Arthur’s name. The night before the funeral the tears stopped but so did her emotions, and that worried Cullen even more than having Athena crying at the drop of a hat.

They stayed until the fire had completely engulfed Arthur’s body. Cullen looked down at Duchess, “Ready?”

Athena nodded her head and they went back to the keep. Cullen walked with her up to their quarters. Athena had told him that the dreams of him dying stopped the night Arthur died, now she was just left with reliving the horror of being abducted. Cullen had preferred it when she was dreaming of him because he could reassure her that he wasn’t going anywhere. He couldn’t make her forget what she went through and what it cost her. Not that he would want her to forget, but he hated seeing her suffer the same thing he lived with.

Cullen pulled Athena out on to the balcony and wrapped her in his arms. He was really quite worried, as she stood still as a stone in his embrace, “Athena, talk to me. Cry, scream, something…”

“I can’t… I feel empty, that I should have tried harder to save him,” her voice was barely above a whisper.

“You did everything you could,” Cullen emphatically reassured her.

“Did I? I never finished reading that lyrium book he gave me… I should have,” Athena’s guilt was laid bare.

“There is no cure for what he took, Athena. You know how volatile raw lyrium is. You didn’t do anything wrong. Why he did it is what confuses me.”

“I’m just the one that got everyone abducted,” Athena was merciless.

“And if you had been allowed to fight, no one would have been abducted,” Cullen wanted to pace, but instead took hold of his wife’s hand and lifted her chin so he could look in to Duchess’ haunted eyes, “When I told them to protect you... I never thought they would take that to mean to not allow you to fight.”

“That was my father’s idea,” Athena said softly, unsuccessfully trying to avoid her husband’s gaze.

“I understand that he wanted to protect you, but I also know how capable you are. I wish he could have seen that,” Cullen responded gently, with an intense unwillingness to speak ill of the dead.

Athena’s violet eyes filled with tears and a sob broke through. Unable to control her grief anymore, she broke, sobbing and crying uncontrollably. Cullen pulled her tight against him and held her as she cried, he could handle the tears from her… What he refused to admit was that the emotionless Athena had scared him in to almost thinking that a demon had possessed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Curly: Varric, you have a duty to your readers to make sure they take breaks. You’re quite long winded.  
> I narrow my eyes: What did Seeker run into now?  
> Curly: That’s not the point.  
> I sigh, irritated: There’s only 8 chapters left. Why deny them their fun?  
> Commander Curly: Varric.
> 
> Hey, readers, it’s your loveable dwarf writer extraordinaire here. Go catch a z, break a candy bar, drink some water, have some cuddles? Oh and don’t forget sleep. You’re almost at the end.


	46. Chapter 46

Duchess had a rough night sleeping, after she had breakfast with Curly she went back to bed and slept until lunch. Curly had promised to return for lunch so Athena was quite surprised when she was rudely awakened by loud pounding. She put her robe on, which was getting harder to tie around her waist and went to open the door.

Athena was greeted by Leliana and Josephine. Ruffles took one look at the stretched robe and said, “We need to get you more clothes.”

Athena smiled, “Hello to you too, Josie.” 

The servants pushed past the ladies to set up lunch. One of them bumped into Athena, causing her to lose her balance, which raised the ire of Leliana. Before Nightingale could terrorize the unlucky servant, Duchess reminded her, “We are in their way.”

“They could have waited until we moved out of the stairwell,” Leliana grumbled as they walked up the stairs.

Athena waited patiently for the servants to leave before getting dressed. She put on a violet dress that matched her eyes. Which led to Ruffles smiling smugly, “What clothing would you like to get?”

“Shouldn’t you be planning your wedding?” Athena teased as they sat down to eat.

“I am. There is no reason that I cannot do both,” Josephine answered.

“Order bigger dresses… And a larger robe,” Athena blushed slightly and changed the subject, “Why are you really here?”

“Because we missed our friend,” Leliana quickly stated, anxious to move on, “and now that everyone knows…” 

“You want details,” Duchess chuckled softly. 

“When did you find out?” Ruffles asked.

“The day before Cullen and I got married here,” Athena responded.

“How far along are you?” Nightingale inquired.

“Around four months,” Athena smiled a secret smile thinking back on when the baby moved.

“And the smile is for…” Leliana trailed off.

“Every time I feel the baby move, Cullen rushes over to see if he can feel it,” Duchess’ smile grew, and the other two ladies laughed.

“You don’t seem as ill with this one?” Leliana hoped that what she was hearing was true.

“I’m not. Mostly just tired and hungry. Unless I’m going over rough terrain, then I get some what ill.” Athena went back for a second helping. “If you missed me that much, you would allow me to go back to work. Why are you really here?”

“Hawke would like to return to Skyhold,” Leliana informed her.

“For what reason?” Athen knew several people and a dwarf would be quite unhappy to hear this.

“She wants to talk to Segrid,” Leliana answered.

“Isn’t Segrid traveling in Orlais?” Athena pushed her empty plate away.

“Segrid is due back tomorrow for a few days.”

“And Hawke is nearby,” Athena sighed. “Does Varric or Cullen know?”

“If Varric knows, he hasn’t said anything. And we thought you would have an easier chance of talking to the Commander…” Josephine looked at Leliana. Leliana “forgot” to mention that she already tried to talk to Cullen about the matter.

“Anders is with Hawke,” Athena stated as she got up to stretch, “I guess I should go find them.”

“Good luck,” Nightingale and Ruffles said as they hugged her and left. Athena looked wistfully at her bed, yawned, and left to track Curly and I down.

“You know, Darius, you really need to work on your sparring skills,” Curly taunted as he easily dodged a rush from Darius.

“If I had a Commander that wanted to spar on a daily basis, I would be better at it,” Darius griped as Curly put him in a headlock.

“I have a wife and a child on the way.” Cullen looked up at the stairs of the keep to see Athena walking down them and groaned, “That I should be spending time with instead of sparring with you.”

Duchess took one look at them, and shook her head, “Don’t stop on my account.”

“How is it that you ended up with the most understanding woman in all of Thedas?” Darius asked as they locked up again.

“Understanding? That’s sweet. However, the Commander did forget about me… So, Darius, I hope you win,” Athena continued walking past the sparring ring without stopping.

“How, in the name of Andraste, did you forget about her?” Darius was incredulous.

Cullen wasn’t paying attention to Darius at all as he watched his wife walk past him. He called after her, “Where are you going?”

Athena called back, “To the tavern.”

“Why?” He asked, and then he was promptly taken down by Darius for the win.

“Now, I understand what Dorian means when he says that I should have the Inquisitor distract you. And you should not have forgotten about your wife,” Darius chuckled.

“Tomorrow you’ll be the one eating dirt,” Cullen challenged.

“So long as I’m not responsible for you forgetting about your wife again,” Darius laughed at the dark expression on Curly’s face as they left the sparring ring and walked to the tavern.

Athena saw them first and smirked, recognizing the dark look on her husband’s face, “Cullen lost.”

“You’re usually not happy about that,” I quipped.

“I’m usually not forgotten about,” Athena smoothly replied.

I gasped, horrified, “Curly forgot about you?!”

“I believe I told you after lunch,” Cullen griped as he sat beside her.

“Unless Leliana and Josie brought me lunch early, Which I doubt… It is after lunch.”

“Why are you here?” Cullen decided it was in his best interest to not to pursue the subject further.

“Because I needed to talk to Varric,” Athena said sweetly.

“You’re in trouble, Curly,” I chuckled. “What did you need, Duchess?”

“The tavern isn’t really the place to discuss it,” Athena dropped the teasing and became serious.

“It doesn’t sound like this is good news,” I remarked.

“It also sounds as though it can’t wait until after I eat,” Cullen groused.

“There’s plenty of food in our chambers… from lunch,” Athena reminded him as we got up to leave. 

I chuckled again, “This is almost as good as Curly having admirers in Halamshiral.”

“I can spar with you tomorrow, too, dwarf,” Curly almost growled. Athena yawned, prompting him to say, “You should still be asleep.” 

“I probably would be, had I not been woken up for lunch,” Athena spoke lightly. (This was the most teasing I had seen out of Duchess in weeks.)

“Woman,” Cullen growled. I laughed as we went in to their chambers.

Once the door was shut and we were sitting so Cullen could eat, Athena got right to the point, “Hawke wants to talk to Segrid.”

“She’s in Orlais,” Cullen filled his plate, not putting it together about how Nightingale wanted to talk to him about Hawke when Arthur was dying.

“According to Leliana, she’s due back tomorrow,” Athena grabbed a cookie.

“I thought Hawke wanted to stay far away from here,” I was confused.

“This is news to you too then?” Athena questioned.

“If I had known, I would have told you, Duchess.”

“Varric, I wasn’t accusing you of anything. You’re loyal to your friends, I don’t expect you to treat me any better than you do Hawke. Anyway, Hawke is apparently nearby and Anders is with her. They want to talk to Segrid,” Athena took a bite of her cookie.

Cullen stopped eating and growled, “This is what Leliana wanted to talk about. They can wait until Segrid leaves again.”

“You talked to Leliana about this already?” Duchess was confused but followed with, “Do you know when that would be?” 

Cullen sighed in irritation, “Leliana wanted to talk to me a couple weeks ago about Hawke. I refused to discuss it at the time… I can have her turn around and go in to Fereldan immediately.”

“When? And is that fair to Segrid?” 

“Maybe not, but I’ll not risk your safety,” Cullen answered the easier question first and waited until he finished eating before continuing, “It was before Arthur…”

Athena closed her eyes against the sting of tears, not needing Cullen to finish. She shakily sighed and choose to focus on Hawke and Blondie, “They don’t want to meet with me.”

“So the Inquisitor is supposed to be restricted to her chambers in her home?” I disbelievingly asked.

“Why would I have to stay here?” Athena was bewildered. 

“The last time Anders was here, he attacked you,” Cullen said emphatically.

“He doesn’t want to meet with me, and he helped Ana,” Athena implored.

“Duchess, when he attacked you, he wasn’t meeting with you. You were just walking from Curly’s office to the keep,” I reminded her.

“He also planned to attack you if you didn’t meet with him,” Cullen also reminded her.

“Am I supposed to deny him a chance to be just Anders again?” Athena was unable to see past Anders’ good intentions.

“No, they just don’t have to meet in Skyhold,” I calmly stated.

“They’re already nearby. It would not surprise me one bit if they’re standing at the front gates tomorrow.”

“They aren’t that close,” Cullen said with absolute certainty.

“No?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him.

“Leliana and I have had patrols scouting the mountains for a while now.”

“How long?” Athena was irritated that she hadn’t been informed of this.

“Since you were attacked by him the first time,” Cullen got up to pace.

“Duchess, Anders isn’t safe to be around. Hawke and I argue constantly about him.” I stood, getting ready to leave, “And I would hate to see everything you two have worked so hard to attain be lost because of Blondie’s loose control. I understand that you want to help him, but find somewhere for him and Segrid to meet that’s far from Skyhold and far from you.” I left so our lovers could talk privately.

Cullen turned to face her, “Varric is right.”

“If he is that dangerous, then I shouldn’t let Segrid meet with him. If we don’t let him talk to Segrid, there’s no hope for him,” Athena quietly stated.

“Segrid isn’t my concern,” Cullen said a little harshly.

“But she is mine. She is an agent of our peace keeping force and I shouldn’t be willing to ask her to walk in to possible danger if I’m not,” Athena stood.

“For years you walked in to danger on a daily basis. Almost sacrificing yourself several times. You have every right to sit out on a dangerous meeting if you desire to,” Cullen walked over to her and took hold of her hand.

“Who else is going to be willing to meet with him outside of the safety of Skyhold to protect Segrid?” Athena looked in to his brown eyes.

“I don’t care so long as it’s not you,” He rasped out, looking down at Athena’s belly and brushing the back of his hand against it, “I will, if need be.”

“Cullen, you were a Templar. That’s a sure fire way to set him off if he can’t control Vengeance. Don’t ask me to send you into potential danger,” Athena’s violet eyes filled with tears. “Especially now.”

Cullen released her hand to put both of his hands where their baby was currently residing and slid them to Duchess’ back. He pulled her against him and kissed her, “This doesn’t have to be decided right now. Why don’t we talk to Segrid first?” Athena nodded in agreement. Cullen smiled at her, “What would my lady wife like to do with the rest of the day?”

“I don’t know…” Athena thought for a moment, “walk the battlements?”

“If that is what you would like to do,” Cullen released her to take her hand and they walked out of their chambers at the same time I was regaling Nightingale and Ruffles with how Curly forgot about Duchess. Cullen griped, “Varric you and I are sparring tomorrow.” Athena yawned, in response, He asked, “Are you sure you don’t want to go back to bed?”

“If I went back to bed I would be sleeping for the rest of the day,” Duchess answered.

“Who said we would be sleeping?” Curly whispered, getting her to blush. He smiled slowly and kissed her.

“After our walk,” Athena said softly. They walked out of the keep and up to the battlements arm in arm.

They made their way to the wobbly tower and Athena looked up at the ladder and back at Cullen almost shyly, “You want to go up don’t you?” Athena nodded. Cullen shook his head at her and motioned for her to go ahead of him. Once they made it to the top they felt the thing wobble. Cullen grumbled, “I don’t understand how this thing can still move.”

Athena smiled as she walked over to the edge of the tower, “Maybe there’s a loose foundation stone.”

“If you plan to continue to come here, I’m going to have the workers tear it down and rebuild it,” Cullen groused as he wrapped his arms around her.

“In a month or two I won’t be able to climb the ladder anyway,” Athena leaned back against him.

“Good, then I can tear it down,” he teased, trying to get her to laugh.

“Cullen!” Athena chuckled, “Where would I go to watch the sunsets?”

“Somewhere that doesn’t feel as though it’s going to come crashing down?” Cullen was only half joking.

“This is the only point in Skyhold that faces west.”

“Not true, you can stand on the Mage tower and face west,” Cullen argued.

“You mean the tower that’s taller than this one now?” Athena turned in his embrace to look at him.

Cullen closed his eyes and groaned, “Forget I said anything about that one.”

“Are you afraid of heights?” Athena was kind of hoping her strong, former Templar had an irrational fear or two like she did. (You mean besides worrying and being over protective of you, Duchess?)

“I’m afraid of my pregnant wife going somewhere that she could get hurt and not be easily reached,” Cullen softly confessed as he stared in to her violet eyes.

“I’m usually pretty good at protecting myself.”

“I would rather you not have to protect yourself,” Cullen paused to kiss her, “especially while you’re with me.”

“I love you,” Athena said softly and kissed him.

“I love you, too. Can we get down now?” Curly asked eagerly.

Athena chuckled, “Yes.” They walked to the ladder where Cullen released her hand and started to go down the ladder first. Athena sighed, “I cannot believe this tower has you this terrified.”

Cullen looked up at her, “What are you talking about?”

“You usually let me go first,” Duchess smiled patiently.

“If I were to let you go first, I wouldn’t be able to catch you if you slipped or fell,” he was halfway down the ladder.

“My balance isn’t that off yet,” Athena said as she went down the ladder.

Cullen raised an eyebrow at her, “This has nothing to do with your balance and everything to do with my desire to protect you.”

Athena shook her head at him, and teased, “I guess I will allow it.”

“You guess?!” Cullen questioned as he took her in his arms and kissed her passionately. Which was rudely interrupted by Duchess’ growling stomach.

“I miss the days when I could forget about food,” Athena sighed dejectedly.

“I don’t. Let’s find you something to eat,” Cullen smiled at her.

They came in to the main hall and Athena grabbed a couple chocolate chip cookies. Cullen’s reaction was a shaking of his head and he said, “You can have more than that.” 

“This is all I want right now,” She hooked her arm through his. They ascended to their chambers and after Duchess ate her cookies they made love for the rest of the afternoon. After dinner she fell asleep in Curly’s arms. 

He stayed up caressing Athena’s shoulder wondering what it would be like to be a father. Would he be a good father? Should he give up being Commander so he could take care of his family? He also wondered if the child would have magical abilities like their mother. Which worried him even more. Cullen gently placed his free hand on her belly and whispered, “I would do anything to protect you two.” 

And then there was a knock at the door. Cullen gently shifted out from underneath Athena and threw on a pair of pants. When he answered the door, the note handed to him read: Segrid is here. Hawke and Anders followed her in.

Cullen growled low, he went back up the stairs and hastily threw on a shirt. As he was grabbing his sword Athena shifted in her sleep. He froze, not breathing, and waited to make sure she was still sleeping. Once he was assured that she was still sleeping he left silently, taking the note with him. 

Segrid, Hawke, and Anders were sitting at a table in the main hall talking quietly when Cullen came down. He looked around for Leliana who was standing in front of Josephine’s office door. Curly strode over to her, “Why are they here?”

“The Inquisitor pardoned Anders, Commander,” Leliana reminded him quietly.

“I was there when she did it. That does not mean I want him anywhere near her,” Cullen whispered, never taking his eyes off of Anders.

“Where is she?” 

“Sleeping, and I would like it to stay that way,” he remarked.

“Is she feeling all right?”

“She hasn’t been sleeping well since we came back from the circle tower. Why are they in the main hall?” Cullen questioned.

“It was the most public place I could think of. I didn’t hear from you or the Inquisitor…” Leliana trailed off.

“We had decided to talk to Segrid first,” Cullen sighed, “Athena thought Hawke and Anders would be right on Segrid’s heels. Was Segrid willing to talk to them?”

“She seemed to be. I overheard her saying that it was nice to meet someone similar to her,” Leliana answered. They went quiet listening to the conversation.

“Thank you for speaking with us, Segrid,” Hawke stood. Anders stood as well and followed Hawke out. Curly and Nightingale overheard Hawke ask, “Is this something you’re willing to do?”

“It seems simple enough. What aren’t you telling me, Hawke?” Anders asked as they left the keep. 

Because Cullen was watching Anders he did not see his lovely wife come in to the main hall and sit beside Segrid. He glanced over when he heard Segrid chuckle and then did a double take, “She says I’m silent.”

Leliana chuckled softly, “Forgetting to meet your wife for lunch and now not noticing that she came down the stairs. Are you sure it’s the Inquisitor not getting any sleep?”

“Ha ha,” Cullen replied without mirth and he walked over to stand by his wife.

“Inquisitor, why were they so hesitant to let Anders in?” Segrid asked.

Athena sighed, trying to find a gentle way to explain it, “A lot of people consider him not deserving of another chance… And the last time he was here he attacked people I care for.”

“He also attacked you, Inquisitor,” Cullen interjected. Athena looked up at him, she was not pleased.

“He attacked you?” Segrid was worried. Especially since Duchess had been nothing but kind to her.

“It wasn’t Anders that attacked me. It was Vengeance. Tonight, you were talking to Anders,” Athena tried to explain.

“Is Vengeance his teacher?” Segrid tried to find a parallel between what she and her “teacher” have and what Anders had done.

“No. Anders initially took in a spirit of justice that was trapped outside of the Fade. Because of Anders’s anger towards anything to do with circles and Templars… It changed the spirit in to vengeance. Anders doesn’t have complete control over Vengeance anymore, and Vengeance can come out at times when Anders is desperately needed,” Athena paused, “Anders, Vengeance is why there has been concern over your being here.”

“I’m not him, though,” Segrid stated.

“I understand that. But I’ve also seen how some people talk to you. I don’t think it’s right, but when people are afraid…” Duchess trailed off.

“They do irrational things. Thank you for explaining this to me, Inquisitor,” Segrid left.

Cullen took the seat just recently vacated by Segrid, “You were sound asleep when I left.”

“And you should have woke me or at least left me a note,” Athena reprimanded.

“I was hoping that you would still be asleep when I returned,” Cullen didn’t feel the least bit guilty for not telling her.

“Cullen, I appreciate that you want to protect me from every possible danger, and I love you for it. But, you’re going to drive yourself crazy doing it, and I’m not helpless. Considering I took down Corypheus I think I can protect myself and our baby just fine,” Athena leaned back in her chair.

“You weren’t with child when you faced Corypheus,” Cullen felt the need to remind her of what was growing inside her.

“I wasn’t, but he was a magister from the dawn of time bent on destroying the world and becoming a god. I’m pretty certain if things got intense with Anders, I could handle it. After all, he isn’t Corypheus.”

“Corypheus wasn’t able to knock you unconscious,” Cullen was terse as he got up to pace.

Tears filled her eyes as she said with a broken whisper, “It wasn’t Anders…”

Cullen turned to face her, “Athena, what do you mean?”

“I remember there being a lot of blood… Too much blood for the cut Darius had and after I healed him I got a sharp pain in my abdomen and it kept increasing in intensity until I passed out,” She spoke quietly, with tears rolling down her cheeks and onto the hand that was in front of where another child resides.

Cullen sat down beside her and covered her hand with his and lifted her chin with the other hand, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“The pain grew in intensity so quickly that there wasn’t time. Afterwards, I felt like my memory was playing tricks on me,” Athena’s voice was still barely above a whisper.

“What made you so certain of it now?”

“Because I was dreaming about it before I came down here…” Athena involuntarily shuddered.

“You know better than most that dreams play tricks too,” Cullen’s voice was soft.

“I know, but I don’t remember the energy ball hitting me… Which means I was already unconscious,” Athena’s fear was still lurking in her eyes.

“What else happened in this dream?” He gently wiped her tears away.

“The same thing that’s been happening in them since I was taken… You died,” Athena answered.

“You had said that it stopped?” Cullen inquired as they stood and made their way back to their quarters.

Athena shrugged her shoulders, at a loss to explain why that particular dream came back, “It did, after my father died. I don’t understand why it’s back now.”

“Morrigan was certain that Bernard had used your dreams against you,” Cullen couldn’t help but wonder if that was the cause of Athena’s nightmares. They walked out on to the balcony.

“I don’t know. I just wish…” Athena stopped short of saying what she was thinking because of what Cullen went through on an almost nightly basis.

“That they would stop and not return,” He finished for her and wrapped his arms around her.

Athena closed her eyes as tears glittered on her eyelashes, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I understand. During the war you said that you had trouble sleeping…” Cullen trailed off.

“Most nights it was because I would wake up and not be able to go back to sleep. Or I couldn’t get to sleep because my mind was racing. It was almost never because of nightmares.” Athena turned away from Cullen, she whispered, “I feel like I’m going insane because the dreams are constant.”

Cullen closed his eyes against the sting of tears, one of his worst fears being realized, “Have you talked to Morrigan or Dorian about this?”

“No. If it was Bernard’s magic wouldn’t it have stopped with his death?” Athena wanted it to be true.

“From what I understand of magic, yes. But Bernard seemed to be using methods that weren’t safe to use,” Cullen said quietly. Athena yawned as he finished talking. He released her and took her hand to walk back in to their chambers, “You need to at least try and sleep.”

Athena looked at him with her violet eyes filled with terror, “I don’t want to.”

“I promise you that I won’t leave. I will hold you all night and well in to tomorrow morning, but you need sleep, if not for yourself then try for the little one growing inside you,” Cullen implored.

“You’re not going to stay up all night, are you?” She asked, the terror in her eyes turning to worry.

“You do not need to worry about me. You spend your days and nights worrying and caring for everyone else. Why don’t you take a couple days and care for yourself for a change?” Cullen requested…demanded.

“I think that had been Leliana’s intent since we came back,” Athena sighed as she undressed.

“So she tells you of Hawke and Anders wanting to meet Segrid?” He was reminded of how angry he was with a certain Nightingale.

"I don’t know, Cullen,” she sat heavily on the bed and yawned.

“I’m sorry, Athena…” He sighed as he sat beside her, “I tell you to worry about yourself and here I am questioning you about others.”

“You’re forgiven,” she kissed him. He laid her gently back on the bed and they made love. Before Athena fell asleep she felt the baby move, she took Cullen’s hand and placed it where she felt the baby move. She whispered, “The baby moved again. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he whispered hoarsely. Cullen fought off sleep because he was determined that he would do everything in his power so Athena could get a decent night’s sleep. She woke about once an hour and because Curly was holding her, she was able to go right back to sleep.

Cullen couldn’t help wondering if her dreams weren’t magically induced and he resolved to talk to Dorian about it on the morrow. As the sun rose he couldn’t fight off sleep anymore and closed his eyes. They both slept until nearly lunch when Dorian came knocking.

Athena woke first. She saw how high the sun was and gasped. Her gasp woke Curly who was instantly awake and asked, “Are you all right?”

“It’s almost lunch time,” Athena blushed. “How long were you up last night?”

“What happened to you not worrying about anyone else?” Cullen raised an eyebrow at her.

“You’re my husband, I’m going to worry about you. When did you fall asleep?” Athena got out of bed to get dressed.

Cullen crossed his arms behind his head and watched his wife get dressed, enjoying the view, “Around sunrise. How did you sleep?”

“Better, thank you. But… Cullen, you need to sleep too,” Athena smoothed her blue dress over her belly and murmured, “I think I’m going to need more clothing before what Josie ordered arrives.”

Cullen chuckled as he got out of bed. He walked over to where Duchess was standing and kissed her, “I guess you’ll just have to borrow some of my shirts then.”

Athena shook her head at him as Sparkler called through the door, “It would be nice to have lunch with my cousin before I die of old age. We planned this date.”

Athena looked at Cullen, confused. He shrugged his shoulders as he got dressed. Athena called out, “Come in.”

“It’s about time,” Dorian grumbled.

“It’s good to know some things never change,” Athena smiled, glad to hear her cousin grumbling.

“Yes, that you and the Commander are always late to lunch is something that never changes,” Dorian quipped.

“I was talking about your patience…” Athena started.

“And lack there of,” Cullen finished causing Athena to softly chuckle.

“When was this planned?” Athena asked after she thanked the servants for bringing lunch to them and showing them out.

“Yesterday,” Dorian answered.

“I didn’t see you yesterday,” Athena was now very confused.

“Not you, your husband,” Dorian remarked.

“I said that there could be a possibility to get a chess game in,” Cullen was not paying attention to Sparkler.

“When do you ever say no to a chess game?” Sparkler was aghast at what Curly was implying.

“I do have other things to do that do not involve entertaining you,” Cullen tersely said.

“You can find time to spar with Darius. Give me one example,” Dorian challenged.

“Your love is my second in command. He has to do what I tell him to do. As for an example spending time with my wife who is with child. She also happens to be your cousin, the herald of Andraste, and the Inquisitor,” Curly smirked.

Once Sparkler stopped blushing, he asked, “What took you so long to answer the door?”

“We were sleeping,” Athena blushed, embarrassed.

“Another sleepless night?” Dorian’s glibness was gone as his concern for his cousin was a serious matter to him. They all sat down at the table to begin eating.

“I slept better than I have been, but that’s because Cullen stayed up all night to make sure I was able to go back to sleep."

“I wouldn’t have to lay awake at night if you would wake me,” Curly grumbled.

“And disturb the few hours of peaceful sleep you get? I wasn’t tortured,” Athena argued.

“Are you certain about that?” Dorian asked.

“Yes. Why?” Athena returned.

“Because that first day… When Morrigan had put you to sleep, Bernard was talking in a language I couldn’t understand, but he kept saying your name. Arthur had also been injured,” Dorian explained.

“What do you mean?” Cullen dreaded where this was going. He prayed that what he was thinking was wrong.

“I had asked Bernard if he had used Arthur’s blood. He had said that he hadn’t…” Dorian trailed off, “Not long after I was able to escape.”

“Magic is affecting Athena’s dreams?” Cullen asked softly, taking her hand under the table.

“That should have ended with my father’s death,” Athena’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“Maybe you need a vacation,” Dorian shrugged, at a loss to explain why his cousin was still having nightmares.

Athena sighed in frustration at Sparkler’s suggestion and huffed, “Oh, Dorian, not you too.”

“Not me too? What am I being accused of now?” Dorian was genuinely surprised by this.

“Trying to get me to leave because Anders is here,” Athena complained.

“Need I remind you that he blew up the Kirkwall Chantry, has a spirit or demon sharing his body, and that he attacked you?!” Cullen exploded as he got up to pace.

Athena rolled her eyes thinking, here we go again. She sighed as Sparkler made his way to the balcony, “I told you last night that I don’t remember the energy ball hitting me. And you know that he wanted me to judge him… Possibly even kill him.”

“He still attacked you, and what set him off was learning that you were in love with me,” Cullen argued.

“Cullen, he attacked Darius first... And we never found out why,” Athena tried a softer tone as she knew this was a sensitive issue for Cullen.

From the balcony they heard Sparkler say, “We told him of your refusal and then Darius and I kissed.”

“And because of his hatred for Templars…” Athena trailed off, finally understanding what set Anders off.

“It doesn’t make what he did right or even justifiable,” Cullen’s voice was still hard as he continued to pace.

“I’m not excusing what he did. But if by learning about it prevents this from happening again, wouldn’t that be a good thing?” Athena questioned.

“I know how to prevent it from happening again, you are not going anywhere near him,” Cullen turned from his pacing to look at her.

“Skyhold isn’t that big, Cullen,” Athena stood, almost challenging him, angry that his need to protect her was refusing to let him see that she can protect herself.

“Then he can leave,” Cullen was ready to take her up on her challenge.

“And who would escort him out? Templars? Your second in command?” Athena asked and then said softly, “Darius was hurt worse than I was. Why aren’t you more concerned about him?”

“Because Darius won’t be taken by surprise again,” Cullen stopped from his pacing to walk over and place both hands on Athena’s growing belly, “he’s also not my wife who happens to be with child again.”

Athena closed her eyes and fought against the ever present heartache. She rasped out as tears stung her eyes, “You know he didn’t cause the loss of our baby... Dorian, I’m sorry.”

“It’s all right, Cousin. Your husband is correct,” Sparkler came in, “I’m grateful to Anders for helping to save Ana, but I also want to kill him for harming those I love.”

Athena opened her violet eyes to stare in to Cullen’s brown ones. “When he’s Anders, he’s a healer and willing to help. When Vengeance comes out, hopefully there aren’t any explosives, Templars, chantries, or grey wardens nearby.”

“Not funny, Athena,” Sparkler quipped.

“I wasn’t joking,” Athena said softly.

“Why is Anders here?” Dorian asked, it was news to him.

Athena broke her gaze from her husband to look at her cousin, “He wanted to talk to Segrid about the Avaar ritual that can separate fade spirits from living spirits.”

“Have they talked?” Dorian inquired.

“Yes,” Athena answered.

“When?”

“Last night,” Cullen said as Athena turned to lean back on her husband and he put both of his hands back on her belly. He bent down to whisper, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she whispered back.

“When are they leaving?” Sparkler asked hopefully.

“It’s probably going to take more than one conversation, Dorian,” Athena’s tone was gentle.

“Meaning they’re going to be here for a while… I still think you two should go on vacation, but since my love has taken over the Commander’s duties for the next week, I find myself with some free time on my hands. Care for a game of chess?” Dorian asked.

Athena gasped, surprised and worried that Curly was ill, “The next week?!”

“Thanks, Dorian,” Curly griped.

“You are quite welcome,” Sparkler smirked as he left.

When they heard the door close Athena turned in Cullen’s embrace, “You took off for a week?”

“The original plan had been to go to the lake for a couple days,” He blushed.

“The plan changed?”

“I had made the plans before you were taken. With everything that has happened since… I was thinking that you wouldn’t want to go…” Cullen pushed her hair off of her shoulder with a cautious yet hopeful tone of voice.

“Of course I want to go! When are we supposed to leave?” Athena couldn’t contain her excitement.

“This morning,” Curly chuckled softly.

“Can we leave now?” Duchess’ turn to have her voice filled with hope.

“The sun is going to set in a few hours. We’ll leave first thing in the morning. Are you sure about this?” Cullen wanted to be certain that she was okay with this.

“The one thing I’m allowed to do right now would greatly upset my husband so, yes, I’m sure,” she reassured him.

“Anders is not safe to be around. He can’t control the demon that is in him. If and when he completely turns I want you far away from him,” Cullen was beyond frustrated.

“He also does a lot of good,” Athena quietly defended Blondie (she always tries to see the best in people.)

“You had him followed?” Cullen was upset that he wasn’t told about having Anders followed.

“Cullen, we had him followed to see if we could pick up a trail for Solas… They were the only ones we could keep track of,” Athena hoped he would understand.

“That’s how you knew they would be close behind Segrid,” Cullen was pacing again.

“No, their trail went cold a while ago. That was instinct and I can’t help but feel that there’s something more to this exploration of options,” Athena sighed wearily as she sat down.

“You think there’s more behind their sudden interest in Segrid’s ritual?” He sat beside her, “Are you all right?”

“I do… I just don’t have any clue as to what or even where to begin,” Athena smiled and reached up to play with his hair, “I’m fine, just a little tired.”

“Is it normal to be so tired?” Cullen’s worry over his wife and unborn child trumped any concerns he had over Blondie.

“Yes, it is,” Athena replied softly, “Caerwin’s insisted that I see her almost daily with any concern, question, anything.”

“You didn’t see her today,” Curly raised an eyebrow at her.

“She’s insisted, and I’m sure she will find me,” As Athena finished speaking there was a knock on the door.

Cullen went down to open the door, and he let a parade of people in. Servants came in with dinner and measuring tape, Nightingale, Josephine, Caerwin, and I followed. As he closed the door behind us he murmured to himself, “And she thinks my office is bad.”

Caerwin was the first to speak, “I didn’t see you today, Inquisitor.”

“That’s because I haven’t left my quarters today.” Athena answered, “and I still don’t see why the daily visits are necessary. I feel fine.”

“Were you able to rest today?” Caerwin inquired.

“Why have there been daily visits?” Leliana sounded concerned.

Ruffles smirked as she came back up from dismissing the servants that brought in dinner. Cullen noticed, “What do you know?”

“Nothing,” Josephine’s smirk got wider and she went to stand beside Leliana.

“I was able to sleep, and as to why daily visits are needed now is a question I have not gotten an answer to,” Athena was quite frustrated.

“It’s common in the second stage of the pregnancy to have a loss of balance, and with your issues sleeping lately…” Caerwin paused and said so softly that we barely heard her, “I think you may be having twins.”

Josephine’s smirk widened in to a knowing smile, “Dorian owes me money.” And louder, “Caerwin, why don’t you wait until I have the Inquisitor measured for her new wardrobe?”

Caerwin nodded her assent. Ruffles snapped her fingers and the servants with the measuring tapes had Duchess stand and they measured what looked to me like everything. Athena complained, “I fail to see the purpose of getting measured since I’m only going to grow.”

“The purpose is to be able to get you the appropriate clothing,” Ruffles smiled. 

Athena sighed as they finished with her and the servants left. Josephine followed them saying, “it shouldn’t take longer than a month.”

Athena looked directly at Curly, “If it’s going to take that long, I will be wearing your clothing.”

Cullen smiled at her, “My clothes look better on you anyway.”

Athena blushed, “Leliana and Varric, do you really have to stay here?”

Leliana smiled, “We’ll wait outside until Caerwin leaves.”

Caerwin waited until the door closed, “How is your arm?”

“What are you talking about?” Athena was bewildered.

“When I saw you yesterday, you had said that your arm was bothering you,” Caerwin explained.

“No I didn’t,” Athena was still quite confused, and was getting quite worried.

“Athena, we carried on a conversation. You refused to let me check the arm and said that you were going back to bed because you were tired,” Caerwin sounded worried as well. This was something Duchess should definitely remember.

Athena shook her head, “I don’t remember any of that.”

“You’re walking in your sleep,” Cullen said softly, his eyes betraying his worry.

“You’ve never woken up with soreness in odd places?” Caerwin hoped that this was a one time thing.

“Yes, but I thought it was because I slept wrong or because I’m with child… Not because I’m sleep walking.”

“Often times it is, but occasionally pregnancy can cause sleepwalking, too. With the dreams you’ve been having and the stress that you have been under, it makes sense…” Caerwin explained.

Athena sighed, slightly freaked that she was walking in her sleep, and decided to change the subject, “What was this about twins?”

“The Ambassador and Dorian have been asking me about you hourly. I thought I would play a trick on them,” Caerwin smiled.

“So, there aren’t twins? And what can we do to ensure Athena’s safety?” Cullen did not like the thought that his wife was sleep walking.

“It’s possible, but there’s no way for me to know that at this point.” Caerwin answered, “As for the sleep walking, make sure the Inquisitor gets plenty of rest and less stress would be good. Maybe go on a vacation? I’ll take my leave.”

Athena and Cullen nodded their heads in thanks. Next up, Leliana and I. We were finally able to eat dinner. Afterwards I said, “Hawke and I talked today…”

“Oh?” Leliana sounded disinterested, but that’s just her way.

“She said that ever since Duchess pardoned him, all Anders has talked about is getting married, having children… Doing normal things.”

“Does she want to do those things?” Athena didn’t think Hawke was the type to want to settle down.

“She’s not sure. She doesn’t want to lose Anders but she also doesn’t want Vengeance coming out because a baby cries,” I half joked.

Athena shook her head and chuckled, “Varric you need less complicated friends.”

“You have a point,” I laughed, “but I wouldn’t have it any other way. And Curly’s too much fun to get to blush.”

“It a good thing for you that we’re leaving,” he grumbled.

“A romantic get away? To where?” I wanted all the details.

Athena chuckled as Curly blushed and murmured, “There is some business we need to attend to.”

Duchess yawned and was kind enough to answer me, “We’re going to a lake that Cullen would go to as a boy.”

“I thought you wanted to stay in Skyhold for a while?” Leliana questioned.

“When I said that, I didn’t know going there was an option,” Athena smiled at Curly as he moved his chair to sit beside her and put his arm around her.

“I had meant it to be a surprise…” Cullen sounded a bit shy.

“How long will you be gone?” Leliana asked.

“About a week… Maybe longer depending on how easily Athena relaxes,” Cullen was still very worried over her sleep walking.

“Are you sure that’s wise?” Leliana hedged.

Duchess and I looked at each other warily. She answered Nightingale with a question of her own, “It has been suggested a few times today that I should take a vacation. What aren’t you telling us?”

“Am I that easy to read?” Nightingale paused, “We’re getting reports of some bandit activity and there are some demons that have found their way there. With what you’ve been through recently…”

“What you’re saying is that I can’t even go on vacation without having to stop some sort of trouble. I would much rather fight demons than family members,” Athena’s voice had an edge of bitterness to it.

“Can you excuse us?” Cullen attempted to get us to leave.

“I need to see what Tiny and Sparkler are up to, anyway,” I took my leave.

Leliana stayed, “If you are set on going, it may not be a bad idea to take others with you. I know Varric has been talking of one last adventure before he heads home.”

When the door closed behind Leliana, Cullen started pacing. Athena watched him for a while and then said quietly, “Even if we hadn’t intended to go to the lake… I would still have to go.”

Cullen stopped pacing and sat down heavily beside her, “This is our life, isn’t it?”

“I’m afraid it is,” Athena paused, “I’m sorry our lives can’t be semi-normal.”

“I never wanted “normal.” I wanted and still want, you,” Cullen paused to caress her cheek. “It would be nice if there was a little less fighting while you’re with child.”

“I’m not fighting a war or a darkspawn magister from the dawn of time anymore,” Athena smiled sadly, wanting the same thing Cullen did.

“Ha ha,” Curly gently kissed her. He gathered Duchess in his arms and carried her to their bed. They made love and as Athena was about to fall asleep he half teased, “If you get out of this bed to do anything more than go to the water closet, I’m tying you to it.”

Athena opened one violet eye to look at him, “You’re the reason I’m exhausted and may need to get up in the middle of the night.”

Cullen smirked, “In more ways than one.”

**

Cullen and Athena elected to take me, Sparkler, and Tiny (much to Ruffles’ dismay) along. There was also about twenty templars coming along with us. Athena found that to be a bit much, “Do we really need this many?”

“The only thing I want you doing is casting magical armor on the rest of us. This is my way of ensuring that,” Cullen answered.

“Please don’t make me promise you that,” Athena said her voice and eyes filled with fear because of what happened when she was abducted.

“I’m not going to. I know how easily the best laid plans can go awry,” Cullen gently reassured her.

Athena breathed a sigh of relief, “Thank you.”

“I do have one request… And that is that you protect yourself first.”

Athena kissed him, grateful that he was so understanding, “I think I can manage that one.”

“Good. It’s a long and bumpy journey, did you want to try and rest?”

“I actually had something else in mind,” she answered huskily. Cullen smiled and kissed her which led to more.

We were about an hour from the lake when we ran in to the bandit and demon gathering… Athena cast barrier on everyone as we went off to fight demons and bandits. Of course a demon got past us and decided to take on Athena. As Cullen finished off the bandit he was fighting, he saw what was going on and rushed over to help his wife. Athena was just about to finish off her opponent when Cullen attacked it and slew the demon. Athena didn’t want to harm her husband but had to do something with the energy ball she had just thrown in the demon’s direction, so she cast barrier on him so it would absorb the energy ball. She had her back to the battle and one of the soldiers was thrown into her. She had the forethought to grab hold of the carriage to slow the momentum of falling, instead her feet left the ground as the soldier fell and she fell on top of him. Athena rolled off of the soldier to her hand and knees and sat out the rest of the battle. 

Cullen watched it all in horror and as soon as the battle ended he ran to her, helping her up. Athena leaned heavily on him in exhaustion and she was still trying to catch her breath from falling. He decided to pick her up and carry her into the carriage. She gasped in surprise prompting him to worriedly ask, “Are you all right?”

“I think so,” Athena said and then winced as she moved her arm to embrace his neck, “my shoulders and back hurt.”

After he laid her down on the carriage seat he sat opposite of her which she questioned, wondering why he wasn’t sitting with her, “Cullen?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you further. Are you sure?”

“Who else is going to keep me from bouncing off the seat should I fall asleep?”

Cullen moved to sit beside her and as she drifted off to sleep she felt the baby moving. Athena smiled, placing his hand where she felt it move and whispered, “The baby is fine.”

He hoarsely choked out, “Thank the Maker.” Athena didn’t hear him as she was already asleep.

The last hour of the trip was the bumpiest and with each bump Athena would groan or moan in her sleep. Once we arrived Cullen carried his sleeping wife to the cabin that they would be staying in and he called me over, “Can you find a healer?”

“I can do that. Duchess isn’t injured is she?” I asked.

“She said that her back and shoulders hurt… I need to be certain,” Cullen laid her down in bed. I nodded and went to find a healer.

When I came back with a healer in tow, Duchess was sitting up in bed and Curly was pacing. I felt like I had walked into the middle of an argument, “Is this a bad time?”

“Yes,” came from Athena.

“No,” came from Curly.

I chuckled, they were bickering like an old married couple, “You two haven’t been married that long. The healer’s here.”

“No one is touching me until I go to the garderobe,” and with that pronouncement, she threw off the blankets and walked to the garderobe. 

As the door closed I chuckled, “Curly, you have to stop forbidding her from going to the water closet. Especially now.”

“I didn’t forbid it, she refused my help,” Cullen grumbled, irritated that his wife continuously refuses his help.

I laughed, “It’s good to know she still makes a horrible patient.” I grew serious, “If she’s fighting you on that, she’s fine.”

Athena came out of the water closet then and grumbled, “I could hear everything you said, the door isn’t that thick.”

“You still make a horrible patient, Duchess,” I laughed at her glare as I opened the door for the healer.

“The Inquisitor is with child?” The healer blanched.

I rolled my eyes, “I informed you of that.”

“You didn’t say I would be treating the Inquisitor,” the healer was shaking in terror!

“Does that matter?” I was becoming concerned.

“Of course it matters! If my care is insufficient, I’d really rather not be turned in to a toad!” The healer exclaimed.

Athena shook her head and turned her back on the healer. Cullen watched her for a moment to make sure she was all right, “Are you the only healer in town?”

“No, there is a mage healer in the next cabin over… But it’s been said that he’s an,” the healer gasped, “apostate.”

Athena couldn’t suppress her chuckle, “I think I’d rather be seen by the dreaded apostate.”

“But he’s an elf!” The healer exclaimed as I showed them the door. And went to see the elf mage.

Cullen asked Athena, “Do you think this elven mage could be Solas?”

“He wasn’t a healer,” Athena really hoped that the elf who wants to tear down the veil and destroy the world as we know it, wasn’t going to be part of her vacation.

They didn’t have long to wait to find out as the mage came back with me. Athena’s eyes got wide upon seeing her, “Ellendra? The Inquisition sent you here?”

“Only recently. It is good to see you, Inquisitor,” Ellendra bowed a little.

“I’m not royalty, there is no reason to bow to me. Are you happy here?” Athena was happy to see one of her own people.

“I am… except for the man that goes around claiming I’m an apostate,” Ellendra answered.

“And an elf,” I paused for dramatic effect, “and male.”

“We’ll take care of that,” Cullen shot me a glare. I shrugged in response, grinning.

“Varric recognized me. He said that you had been injured and were with child,” Ellendra came in so I could close the door.

“Injured is a bit of an overstatement, but yes, I took a pretty hard hit…” Athena gave me her ‘I’m displeased with your exaggerations’ look.

I shrugged and winked at her, “I worry. Not as much as your husband but…”

Ellendra shook her head, “Should the gentlemen leave so we can talk privately?” 

“I’m not going anywhere,” Curly said mulishly.

“Commander, I understand your concern, but I assure you no harm will come to the Inquisitor. Sometimes ladies need to say things without their husbands present,” Ellendra was gentle but firm.

Athena couldn’t contain her laughter. Which was rewarded by a glare from Cullen. She blushed and sheepishly said, “Sorry, love, but it’s true.”

“You never wanted privacy with Caerwin,” Cullen grumbled.

“It was never offered,” Athena remarked. “Plus, I know Ellendra. Caerwin is still a bit of a mystery to me.”

“Caerwin joined the rebels because she wanted to get away from a templar who fell in love with her,” Ellendra quietly informed them.

“I take it the love was not returned?” Athena dreaded her answer.

Ellendra nodded, “Caerwin is attracted to women, the templar was male. When she turned him down…”

Athena sighed, remembering all too well what the less than stellar Templars could do when refused, “I’ve seen it before, no need to explain.”

“Caerwin is an excellent midwife,” Ellendra said, “even if she may keep her distance.”

“Curly, let the ladies do their thing. We can go torment Sparkler,” I opened the door. 

“I’d rather stay here with you,” Cullen sighed as he looked at Athena. His worry that she was harmed still evident.

“You need to check on the soldiers anyway,” Athena kissed him. “I’ll be fine. And I will tell you the story of how Ellendra and I met later, if she’s all right with it?” Ellendra nodded her head in answer.

Cullen finally came with me through the door and before the door fully closed behind us we heard the ladies giggling. I chuckled, “That doesn’t bode well for you, Curly.”

Cullen sighed heavily, “No, it doesn’t.”

I was able to convince Curly to have at least one drink with me, Sparkler, Tiny, and the soldiers. The one turned into many more. We took so long that Athena came looking for us. I looked up from my drink and saw her with her head tilted to the side with a bemused expression on her face. I groaned, “Oh shit, we’re in trouble.”

“My best friend who mother hens me constantly, and my husband who was so reluctant to leave my side earlier decided to drown their worry in drink?” She sounded very much like Morrigan’s imperious tone. Her violet eyes had a very wicked light to them.

“What about Sparkler and Tiny?” I moaned, worried about what she had in store for me. (Curly was off drinking with some soldiers and had his back to us.)

“The only time I see Bull not drink is when he is with Josie. Varric, if you can tell me one time besides sleeping that my cousin doesn’t drink, I will pay off all of his debt to you.”

“I am not that bad!” Sparkler exclaimed.

“Duchess has a point, Sparkler,” I laughed so hard I almost fell off the log I was sitting on.

“How is it that he has not noticed you standing there?” Sparkler asked in wonderment. Athena shrugged. She wondered how long it was going to take for her husband to turn around.

“May I, Boss?” Bull had a completely evil look.

“Go right ahead,” Athena chuckled, curious to see what Tiny was thinking.

“Looks like the Inquisitor decided to go for a swim,” Tiny bellowed. Cullen threw off his armor and clothes and jumped into the lake to find his wife. Athena sat down beside me and laughed and laughed.

“This isn’t right,” I got out between gasping for air from laughing so hard. The soldiers decided to get in on the prank and took poor Curly’s armor and clothes.

Athena watched them, “I should go get some to towels…”

“You’re not moving are you?” Dorian had planned to hold her down if she got up.

She chuckled, “Not on your life.”

After about ten minutes of Curly frantically searching the lake, Bull bellowed, “Hello, Inquisitor, enjoy your swim?”

Athena laughed as Cullen raced for the shore. Athena sighed, “I really shouldn’t enjoy tormenting my husband so much.”

“Ah, but Duchess, he deserved it this time,” I wiped tears of laughter from my eyes.

Cullen noticed that his armor and clothes were gone, so he stayed in the lake. He glowered at Athena, “You did this."

Athena smirked, got up and left. She called back, “I had nothing to do with the disappearance of your clothing.”

“Athena!” Curly roared. Her lilting laughter was carried back to us by the soft breeze.

I laughed, “You shouldn’t have had your back to her, Curly.”

“This is your fault, dwarf,” Cullen was still treading water.

“I said one drink, not ten,” I turned my back on him so he could get out of the lake with a little grace.

Curly pulled himself out of the water and ran like lightning for their cabin. Once safely behind closed doors he saw a serene Athena sitting on the bed, “Woman, that was…”

“Hilarious,” Athena finished for him, biting her lip so she wouldn’t start laughing again.

“Why would you do such a thing?!” Cullen asked, exasperated.

“All I did was give permission to Bull. Your soldiers are the ones that stole your clothing,” a giggle escaped.

Cullen shook his head, water going everywhere as he paced, “How…” He stopped not sure where to begin or end.

“There are towels on the table. I’ve told you before that they were behaving when you would travel with us. This is how it usually was,” Athena explained.

Cullen grabbed the towels and wrapped one around his waist and dried his hair before talking, “They would pull these kinds of pranks on you?”

“They rarely pulled pranks on me. One of them would ask me permission. I would grant it, silliness would ensue, and I would laugh. For a while Varric and Dorian had a bet going as to who could make me laugh the most.” Athena paused and smiled wickedly, “If that bet is still going, Bull won tonight.”

“We’re married now. I shouldn’t have to keep embarrassing myself in front of you,” Cullen grumbled as he sat beside her. 

“The only thing that got hurt was your pride. And it took everyone’s mind off of more serious things for a while,” She paused again, her wicked smile growing, “I waited an hour for you to return…”

“Why didn’t you come get me?” Cullen was confused, all of that nonsense could have been avoided if she had only just went to get him.

“Because I had a surprise of my own waiting for you,” Athena said softly.

“Oh?” Cullen moved so that they would both be laying on the bed.

“Nope, I’m done trying to surprise you,” She teased.

“Woman,” he growled kissing her neck.

“I’m still not surprising you,” she whispered seductively and gasped in delight as they proceeded to make love.

“I take it that you’re not in pain anymore?” Cullen held her close and caressed her arm.

“Ellendra said I was only bruised and she healed them. She also said that the baby was fine.” Athena yawned and continued sleepily, “She also thinks that I’m with children instead of just child.” Cullen froze upon hearing that and Athena went off to sleep.

**

The next day Curly was able to get his armor and clothing back. I chuckled as he listed off the names of the soldiers he wanted to spar with when we got back to Skyhold. I asked as we ate breakfast together, “Why wait? Why not spar with them now?”

“Because the reason for coming here was so I could spend time with my wife and get her to relax,” Cullen answered.

“No sudden movements or loud noises, please?” Sparkler pleaded, whispering.

“Where is Duchess?” I chuckled at Dorian.

“Sleeping,” Cullen watched their cabin door for any movement. He learned his lesson well last night.

Bull bellowed a, “Good morning!” Causing Sparkler to moan in pain and hold his head.

“Bull, when we get back to Skyhold, we will be sparring,” Cullen informed him.

Bull guffawed, “Why wait? Let’s do it now.”

Athena came out of the cabin and looked up at the sun despondently. Cullen smiled, “The lady that just woke is the reason we’re waiting.”

Said lady came over and sat beside Curly. One of the soldiers promptly brought over a plate of food. I asked, “Is something wrong?”

“I missed the sunrise,” Athena pushed the food around on her plate.

“Duchess, I got used to you eating, don’t stop on me now,” I was worried.

“Sorry, Varric…” Athena sighed. “Today was my mother’s birthday and I would always get up at sunrise to release her favorite flower in to the wind. When she was alive, it was my gift to her.”

Cullen stopped eating and looked at her, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I’m always up at sunrise,” Athena felt as though she was stating the obvious.

“You went through quite a lot yesterday to expect yourself to get up with the sun,” Dorian was still hunched over, but not as green.

“It never mattered before,” Athena griped, disappointed with herself.

“You also weren’t with child before,” Cullen softly reminded her. Athena sighed in response. Cullen suggested, “Why not release the flowers at sunset instead this year?”

“I guess we could do that,” Athena said quietly.

“Is there anything else troubling you?” Cullen inquired because Duchess was still pushing the food around on her plate.

“No, why?”

“You’re still not eating,” Sparkler noted.

“I’m not hungry,” Athena answered.

“Why not?” The three of us asked in unison… I got the distinct impression that we were pulling teeth. Her way of getting me back for last night.

“Chocolate chip cookies,” Athena smirked.

Sparkler and I laughed. Curly admonished, “That is not a breakfast.”

“It’s what I wanted.” Athena stood, “And now I’m going for a swim.” 

Curly looked at her like she had taken leave of her senses. Athena smiled mischievously, “We could have gone swimming and so much more last night.”

“I thought you were swimming last night.” Cullen grumbled, still sore over the pranks played on him, and then wondered, “What are you swimming in?”

“The lake,” Athena answered wickedly.

“That’s not what I meant,” Curly groused, trying not to blush. (I’m so glad I was taking notes.)

“You could come with me and find out,” Athena challenged and started to walk away.

Curly quickly and silently walked after her. Before she could get very far he picked her up in his arms and said after she squealed in surprise, “Your swim is going to have to wait.”

She sultrily responded, “You’re still not getting your surprise.”

“Woman,” he growled.

Tiny, Sparkler, and I enjoyed the romantic scene playing out before us. I quipped, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen two people better suited for each other.”

“I think the Commander loses a lot to my cousin,” Dorian commented.

“Considering what she does for him, I don’t blame him,” Bull waxed philosophical on us.

“What she does for him?” I wondered if Tiny saw the same changes I did.

“It doesn’t take a spy to notice that Cullen is a lot more approachable by more than soldiers now. He also has a peace to him that is a direct result of the Boss’s unwavering faith in him. It’s a peace many men crave but can never find.” Bull chuckled, “And she’s fucking gorgeous.”

“Bull!” Sparkler was shocked that he would say that about a married woman. Especially when he was set to marry another. I laughed.

“I’m not ashamed to admit that for about a week I thought I could convince her to give old Bull a ride, but then I saw how she looked at Cullen and knew I didn’t stand a chance,” Tiny explained.

“Does Ruffles know?” I was still chuckling.

“Josephine had a crush on her too,” Bull chuckled.

I laughed, “And she was oblivious to all of it. Andraste preserve us all if she ever finds out.”

**

“Ready for that swim now?” Cullen held her after making love.

Athena softly chuckled, “I don’t know if I’m able to move now.”

Cullen smugly smiled, “Good. Now will you tell me what you wanted to surprise me with last night?”

“No.”

“Why not?” He propped himself on his elbow so he could look at her. Cullen was utterly confounded as to why he was still having to pay for not noticing her last night.

“Because I can still do it tonight,” Athena drew circles on his chest. When she looked back up at him from her ministrations, she gasped at the passion in his expression.

Cullen gently placed his hand on her expanding belly, “I don’t want…”  
Athena interrupted him by kissing him and pushing him back on the bed, she said huskily as she mounted him, “My turn.” He held on to her hips to keep her from losing balance and they reached ecstasy together.

Cullen helped to move her to his side and Duchess started to fall asleep only to be startled out of a heavy doze by yelling in front of their door. Athena groggily started to get out of bed… Only Curly wouldn’t let her move, “Athena, rest.” And he got out of bed.

“But I want to be with you,” She sleepily reached out for him.

“I’ll be back as soon as I see what the yelling is about,” He responded quietly as he got dressed. He took the hand that was dangling off the bed and placed it over her belly, as she had already dozed off again. With a catch in his throat he whispered, “I love you.”

Outside he saw Morrigan and Alistair tearing in to each other verbally. Sparkler saw Curly first and walked over to him, “Where’s Athena?”

“Sleeping. Why?” Cullen dreaded the answer he was about to get. He was getting quite irritated as this was supposed to be a vacation, and yet problems kept finding them.

“You aren’t going to be happy to hear the reason they’re arguing, and I’m going to be sitting outside your door to make sure she stays far away from the royals.” Dorian answered.

“Dorian,” Cullen warned, he was not in the mood for cryptic responses.

“Morrigan has refused to go with them to Denerim, but the the royals want Kieran to continue on.” Dorian explained.

“Any word on what Kieran wants?” Cullen felt for the boy.

“They can’t find him,” Dorian really hoped Duchess wasn’t standing behind him.

“Maker,” Cullen breathed, “keep Athena far away.”

Dorian nodded and went to our lovers’ cabin. Cullen made his way to where Morrigan and Alistair were yelling at each other. Morrigan saw him approach, “At last, someone sensible.”

“I’m only interested in finding Kieran right now. When was the last time you saw him?” Cullen asked as he called his soldiers over with a motion of his hand.

“When the Queen decided ‘twould be better to ride a horse than in a carriage,” Morrigan snapped.

“Where and when, Morrigan?” Cullen’s tone brooked little patience.

“Ten minutes east of here,” Morrigan was still staring angrily at Alistair.

The soldiers mounted up on Cullen’s orders, “You all know what Kieran looks like. No stone goes unturned. If you come across a tree, climb it. Kieran needs to be found.”

“Why are you so worried, Commander?” Alistair didn’t think it was necessary to have everyone searching for the scamp.

“Because we ran into some bandits and demons yesterday about an hour east of here. I am under no illusions that there aren’t still stragglers about.” Cullen informed them.

Morrigan immediately started looking for Kieran. Alistair mounted up and rode out with the soldiers to look for the boy. Cullen saw the wagons and carriages and wondered if Kieran didn’t hide in one of those. Tiny and I came over to help. He took one glance at us and ordered, “You need to help Dorian.”

“Curly, there isn’t any power in this world strong enough to keep Duchess from looking for Kieran. The sooner he is found, the sooner we all can rest easy,” I explained.

Cullen nodded in assent and continued to look for Kieran. Once we reached the middle of the royal entourage Cullen called out, “I wish I had someone to practice sword fighting with. My sword arm has been getting a bit rusty.” 

As soon as the words were out we heard rustling in one of the nearby wagons. Curly smirked as he saw Kieran pop his head out. Cullen motioned for him to come out, “It’s all right, Kieran. We’re just glad your safe.”

“I fell asleep. I didn’t mean to worry everyone,” Kieran said sheepishly.

Cullen walked him over to Morrigan, “Once the Inquisitor is awake we will want to talk to him.”

“Aye… Commander?” Morrigan put an arm around her boy.

“Yes?” Cullen had started to walk away to call the soldiers and king back.

“Thank you,” Morrigan said, uncomfortably.

Cullen nodded and had a soldier play a loud horn to call back those that went out searching for Kieran. Not even five minutes later we heard an irate Athena screech, “Dorian!”

Curly chuckled, “I’m going to go save my wife from her cousin. Can one of you take count as to who returns?”

“You got it, Curly,” I said.

Cullen looked at their door and asked Sparkler, incredulous, “You barricaded the door?”

“Oh good, I’m going to run before my cousin kills me,” Dorian released the barrier and started running.

“When I said to keep her away I meant to distract her like you usually do, not hold her prisoner,” Cullen called after him.

“Tried that… she heard the horn and thought you were going in to battle. So I told her that you were looking for Kieran…” Dorian called back.

Cullen shook his head and went in to their cabin to face the wrath that is Athena. Athena looked directly at him, still seething, “How much involvement did you have with Dorian locking me in here?”

“I had wanted him to distract you if you woke, not keep you in here by yourself,” Cullen explained softly.

“Where’s Kieran?” She questioned, her anger slowly leaving her.

“Safe and with his mother. He fell asleep in one of the wagons they brought with them.”

“Why didn’t you wake me?” Athena asked plaintively. She adored Kieran, and it bothered her that he was missing and she wasn’t allowed to help search for him.

“Athena, what could you have done? I would not have allowed you to risk yourself by riding out with the soldiers or climb in to the wagons.”

“Cullen, I’m with child, I’m not ill, my balance hasn’t been affected all that much yet,” Athena argued.

“All the more reason to make certain you’re not hurt.” He walked over to her and caressed her cheek, “When have I ever intentionally woken you from sleep?”

Athena chuckled softly, “Never...next time you want me distracted, send Varric. Why are they here? Isn’t this the opposite way to Denerim?”

“Morrigan didn’t want to continue the journey with them and the royals apparently want to take Kieran with them,” Cullen chuckled at her request for me.

“That doesn’t explain why they’re here. What does Kieran want?” She looked up at him.

“Why don’t we go ask him?” Cullen suggested as he put an arm around her to leave.

Morrigan was sitting with Kieran and me when our lovers came out. Morrigan sighed in relief upon seeing Duchess. Athena looked at her, surprised by the sigh of relief, “Morrigan?”

“I am relieved to find that one of my friends has not taken leave of their senses,” Morrigan answered.

“Why are you here?” Athena was curious as she had expected them to be half way to Denerim by now, if not more.

“‘Tis quite the tale, Inquisitor. I believe the Commander had requested to talk to Kieran?” Morrigan reminded them.

“That we did. Kieran, would you like to come with us?” Cullen asked.

“Can we sword fight afterward?” Kieran was hopeful.

Cullen chuckled softly, “I didn’t bring any wooden swords.”

“That’s all right, my father gave me some,” Kieran walked with them.

“We’ll see,” Cullen looked at Athena, trying to see if she would be all right with it. Athena just shook her head, chuckling.

Once the trio was inside Curly and Duchess’ cabin they sat around the table so they could have lunch. Athena asked Kieran, “How has your adventure been so far?”

“Boring. We have to stop frequently for the queen to rest and then mother, father, and the queen would argue. I’ve read all the books I brought with me and I have nothing to read to Marie,” Kieran explained.

“Has the king been spending any time with you?” Cullen inquired.

“A little… But I don’t think he knows what to do with me.”

“What do you mean?” Athena was worried.

“When the Commander would spend time with me, we would wrestle, sword fight, we would also talk. My father doesn’t really do any of that,” Kieran sounded sad.

“It may be because your traveling and he’s worried about the Queen,” Athena suggested.

“The Commander worried about you, and when we met in Val Royeaux, he was still able to do those things,” Kieran argued.

Cullen blushed as Athena smiled at him, she said to Kieran in defense of the king, “Cullen has a younger brother and a younger sister. I don’t think your father has any siblings.”

“Why would that make a difference? You would play with us and you don’t have any siblings,” Kieran made a great point.

Athena blushed, “That’s because for most of my life I enjoyed the company of children and animals far more than the company of adults.”

Kieran chuckled, “You sound like my mother except for the children part.”

Athena gave Cullen an “I told you so,” look. Kieran continued sadly, “I want to go back to Skyhold. I miss Ana. I miss being with you two. I miss my mother laughing.”

“Do you want us to talk with your parents for you?” Cullen offered. He wanted to see Kieran happy.

“You would do that?” Kieran asked excitedly.

“If you wanted us to,” Athena laughed softly at his excitement.

“Yes! Please?” Kieran hugged them and then ran through the door with Athena and Cullen slowly following.

“I doubt we’ll be able to convince Selene and Alistair to come back,” Athena quietly stated.

“We’re closer to Skyhold than Denerim. Kieran has no reason to lie about stopping so much. To get to Denerim they should never have come this way. It doesn’t make sense,” Cullen wondered at the change in direction of the royals.

“Selene seemed so reasonable in Val Royeaux. I wonder why she would jeopardize something she fought so hard for by traveling,” Athena was quite confused by the Hero of Fereldan’s thought process… Or lack there of.

“I don’t know, but once you start having labor pains, we aren’t going anywhere,” Cullen commanded.

“I wish I could promise you that,” Athena said sadly with tears in her eyes.

“Athena?” Her tears came on so suddenly that it worried him.

“Inquisitor, Herald of Andraste, saver of worlds, and leader of the Divine’s peacekeeping force…” Athena sounded aggravated with all of her titles, somewhat regretting her decision to keep the Inquisition forces together.

Cullen pulled her in to his arms and hoarsely said, “We’ll figure it out.” He lifted her face to meet his loving gaze, “We always do.”

**

“Now there is a sensible couple who would like to do nothing more than enjoy the rest of their lives together and the children they will have. Why can’t you two?” Morrigan imperially asked Alistair and Selene as she saw Curly and Duchess approach.

Selene gasped as a contraction hit and ground out, “I wanted to go for a swim.”

“You can’t even stand and you want to go for a swim?! What has got into you?!” Morrigan came close to yelling. The only answer Morrigan received was a moan. She arched her back so much that Alistair had to keep her from falling.

Athena looked at Cullen and smiled sweetly at him, “I’m going to go get Ellendra.”

“We’re here to talk to them, nothing more,” Cullen whispered in her ear.

Athena shook her head at him as she put a protective hand over her baby bump and whispered back, “I want no part in whatever is going on with her.” And then louder, “Varric, please go get Ellendra?”

I walked over to talk quietly with them, “Ellendra isn’t for you?”

“No,” Athena answered quietly, not wanting to go into too much detail with me lest the royals overhear her plan.

“The queen’s refused all assistance. She’s refused to lay down. She’s refused everything I’ve seen you do,” I informed them.

“In the name of Andraste, why?!” Athena whispered emphatically.

“She says it’s a false labor,” I answered.

“And false labors can turn in to real labors if they don’t stop,” Athena remarked as Selene hunched forward, “I’ll let Ellendra be the judge of if she’s truly in labor or not. Let Ellendra know what’s going on. We can use my fall yesterday as the reason Ellendra is joining us.”

We went our separate directions. Cullen helped Athena sit down (maybe) as part of their ruse, and listened as Morrigan and Alistair bickered back and forth while Selene gave every indication that the baby was going to be born within minutes. Athena and Cullen looked at each other worriedly. 

Cullen whispered in her ear, “Poor Kieran.” Athena nodded, agreeing with him. 

When Cullen saw Ellendra and I coming up the hill he explained, “Our healer will be joining us. She had wanted to check on the Inquisitor and this was the only time we could allow for it.”

“Did something happen that the Inquisitor needs to be checked on?” Alistair asked as he rubbed his wife’s back.

“I took a fall yesterday during a battle,” Athena answered quietly.

“And this is the first time you had to see a healer?!” Morrigan was ready to rip in to Duchess and Curly. She had two friends and it utterly astounded her that both of them had taken leave of their senses.

Athena winked at her, “No. You know how us healers are.”

Morrigan chuckled and relaxed. Ellendra sat beside Athena and said, “Hello, Inquisitor. How are you feeling today?” 

The Queen was finally able to sit comfortably… For a moment. Ellendra noticed the sweat and tears on the Queen’s face and whispered to Athena, “For a false labor she’s been in pain for quite some time.”

“We just arrived moments before you did. I’m certain Varric told you that she’s refused all aid?” Athena whispered.

“He has. Did you offer assistance?” Ellendra whispered so they wouldn’t be overheard.

“I hope you don’t mind, but you are my assistance. I’d really rather not be involved in this,” Athena’s voice was still hushed.

“Understood.” Then Ellendra addressed Athena for all to hear in an attempt to get the queen to talk, “How far along are you, Inquisitor?”

“Four and a half months,” Athena quickly answered.

“I thought Ellendra was your healer?” Selene questioned as Marie was brought to her. She seemed almost repulsed by her adopted daughter.

“She is one of the Inquisition’s healers. We did not know that Enchanter Ellendra was here until we arrived yesterday. She has proven to be a great improvement over the first healer we met,” Cullen explained.

Ellendra quickly whispered to Athena, “Unless you want the King and Queen to know of your first pregnancy, say yes to my next question.”

“That would be lying,” Athena whispered back.

“You’re also lying to have me here,” Ellendra whispered. Athena nodded in understanding. “This is your first pregnancy, Inquisitor?”

“It is,” Athena’s voice quavered a little with the lie. Cullen pulled her tighter against him, trusting what she was doing.

“Since the Queen is further along than you, maybe she would have some tips on what to expect in the coming months,” Ellendra looked hopefully at the Queen.

“This is my first pregnancy. I watched a demon kill a pregnant friend of mine,” Selene said bitterly.

“What kind of demon?” Ellendra was cautious.

“A combination of desire and envy,” Cullen replied tersely. This was not a subject he enjoyed talking about.

Ellendra breathed in deeply and released it slowly, “Dear Maker.” 

“You’ve heard of this one?” Alistair wondered.

“I have. The things I’ve heard… They’re not pleasant. Did it show you images of the past? How long were you held captive?”

“She did. And for several months,” Selene handed Marie off to her husband, not wanting anything to do with her.

“May I ask, what were the images?” Ellendra investigated.

“Is this really necessary?” Alistair wanted to defend his wife, and the fact that he missed out on so much with the queen bothered him.

“Is the demon alive or dead?” Ellendra continued with her questions.

“Dead,” Cullen stated.

“Where was it killed?”

“In Skyhold’s dungeon,” Athena responded.

“Did anyone go into the fade to make certain the demon was gone?” Ellendra’s question was essential.

“I thought once a demon was dead, it was dead,” I was confused by the question. 

Morrigan gasped, “Connor Guerrin. We went in to the fade to save him from a demon. Because the demon had so much time with Selene, it somewhat possessed her when her physical form died.”

“Which means because the demon can’t get a real grasp on the Queen, it’s trying to possess the child, and it’s been causing the labor pains,” Athena added. 

“We still need to know what memories were used,” Ellendra’s voice was quiet but authoritative.

“My husband and Morrigan creating a child so Alistair and I could live,” Selene gasped out and shakily reached out for Marie. “And used a former crush against me.” She slid off of where she sat and crouched, begging, “Please, Maker, save my baby.”

Ellendra stood and walked over to the queen. Chanting a few words and moving her arms over Selene she stopped the labor pains. Ellendra helped the queen back to her seat who was breathing easier. Alistair put an arm around his wife and held her close. 

Athena looked at Cullen and whispered, “Were you her crush?”

“If I was I never knew. She would flirt with me and being young I…” He trailed off, whispering back.

“Blushed?” Athena guessed, still whispering.

“Worse, I ran away,” Cullen responded with a whisper and a blush.

Athena briefly kissed him to hide her chuckle. She could not imagine her strong, sweet husband running away from anyone, “Thank you for not running away from me.”

“You’re welcome,” He returned the kiss.

When the kiss ended Athena asked, “How long will the labor pains be stopped?”

“A day at most, she’ll still have some pain but nothing as to where it was,” Ellendra answered.

“I guess we now need to figure out how and who will be going in to the Fade?” Athena thought out loud.

“Having someone go into the Fade takes a lot of lyrium,” Cullen informed everyone, “I can ask the Templars with us if they’d be wiling to give up their lyrium.”

“Would it be enough? Would that be fair to them? They wouldn’t be able to get anymore until we went back to Skyhold,” Athena was understandably very worried for those that would have to sacrifice and possibly suffer for one person.

“There are Templars among my entourage as well. If the mages are willing to give up their supply as well. We may have enough,” Alistair spoke up.

“I don’t use lyrium. Do not include me in your count,” Athena informed him.

“The Commander used to be a Templar,” Alistair was still trying to get a mental count.

“I don’t use it anymore,” Cullen spoke so softly the king almost didn’t hear him.

“We brought twenty Templars with us,” Athena was also trying to get a count.

“I think we’ll have enough,” Alistair sounded more like he was hoping than actually counting.

The Inquisition’s Templars and those with the King overheard the conversation. Every single one of them brought over their lyrium supply. Athena stood, “You do not have to do this. We cannot guarantee that you won’t go through withdrawal.”

They nodded in understanding. A lot of them said that if Selene hadn’t stopped the blight, there wouldn’t be a Fereldan. Others said she was a fair ruler. And a few, just wanted to stop the demon.

“Without a first enchanter here, who knows the spell?” Cullen questioned.

“The daughter of a first enchanter,” Athena’s voice was so small we barely heard her.

“Inquisitor, are you certain you can do this?” Cullen pulled her aside so they could talk without prying ears.

“All I will be doing is saying a spell. Someone else will have to go into the Fade,” Athena smiled at him. “This is the safer path, Cullen. If I still had the anchor I would have to open a rift, send people through, and then reopen it to let them out, along with whatever demons came through.”

“We came here so you could relax,” Cullen sighed heavily, wondering where he could take Duchess so they could be left alone for a time.

“Let’s help the Queen and then we can relax,” Athena stood on tiptoe to kiss him. 

As they walked back to the rest of us, Curly asked, “Do we have a volunteer to go into the Fade?”

“I will,” Morrigan stood.

“You will not! Selene is my wife!” Alistair exclaimed.

“You are not a mage! Plus, the demon would take on Selene’s shape and you would be fooled by her!” Morrigan growled at him.

“I KNOW MY WIFE!” Alistair yelled.

“I think the Inquisitor should,” Selene sneered.

“Absolutely not. How can you even suggest such a thing?” Cullen was disgusted.

“Cullen, look at her. It’s the demon talking.” Athena said quietly, “The demon was probably the one that decided to not let Alistair know of the issues and to get away from Skyhold.”

Cullen nodded, agreeing with Duchess, and then he spoke, “Only one person can go through and it has to be a mage. It will not be the Inquisitor as she is the only one who knows the spell and can assist in healing any injuries that may occur.”

“Morrigan, are you certain?” Athena questioned her friend.

“I only have two friends, I would like to keep both of them,” Morrigan was grateful that Athena cared to check with her. As she hugged Duchess, she gave her a talisman, “Take this, wear it whenever you’re near Selene. It will protect you.”

“Thank you,” Athena moved away from her, “Ellendra, is the cabin beside you empty?”

“It is,” Ellendra nodded.

“Why would that matter?” Morrigan was lost by Duchess’ question.

Athena chuckled, thinking it should be obvious to Morrigan, “I’m not leaving you exposed to the elements.”

“Ready?” Athena asked. Morrigan nodded and the ladies went off to make sure the cabin was habitable.

“Won’t they need help?” Alistair asked.

“They aren’t doing the ritual just yet,” Cullen smiled as he heard his wife laugh. He wondered what Morrigan said that was so funny. It only took the ladies a few minutes and they returned. Cullen looked at Athena, “The cabin is in good shape?”

“It is,” Athena smiled at him.

“Alistair?” Selene walked over to him.

“Yes?” He asked.

“I love you. Be safe,” Selene kissed him for all she was worth.

“I’m not going anywhere…” Alistair trailed off.

Morrigan gagged. Athena looked at her questioningly to which Morrigan responded, “That’s normal… And constant.”

Athena chuckled. Selene moaned in either pain or desire (not sure which,) as Athena called Sparkler and Ellendra over to her so they could discuss what she and they were going to do. When they were finished talking they disappeared into the cabin. The spell took about an hour, and during that hour Cullen paced. He was exhausting to watch.

Ellendra had elected to stay behind to keep an eye on Morrigan. When Athena came out, Cullen walked swiftly to meet her. Athena updated him that Sparkler was going to stay with Ellendra for a while and that Ellendra was willing to care for Morrigan should the need arise. And then he kissed her. That kiss was long, full of love, and worry, but he didn’t want Athena to know about the worry part yet, “Should we find out who Selene’s crush was?”

“You really want to know? You already had me pining away for you in Ostwick,” Athena teased as they walked up the hill. When they got to the top they found Selene crawling on the ground as though she was looking for something. Athena was disturbed by this, “Why are you on the ground? Where did everyone go?”

“I lost my ring… Was there someone with me? Did I lose them too?” Selene questioned.

“Would you like us to help you look for it?” Cullen offered as he and Athena exchanged very concerned looks. Cullen wanted to go find out why the queen was left alone, but he didn’t want Duchess to be left alone with her in case the demon came back.

“Yes, thank you,” Selene gasped as the baby kicked. Cullen looked at her, worried. Selene explained, “the baby kicked and with all the labor pains... It was more painful than I expected.” Selene arched her back to where her large belly was scraping the blades of grass, “I truly wish this back pain would stop.”

Cullen gently helped her to her feet and had her sit on the ground with a log supporting her back, “Do you remember when the demon has control?”

“In a way… It’s almost as though I’m watching and hearing everything through a thick fog, everything is just out of reach. And then I’ll start fighting to come back,” Selene pulled her knees up as far as she could to stretch her back on the log. A sigh of relief escaped her. As she lowered herself to the ground she slipped and came down a little hard on the ground bringing on another contraction.

Athena watched all of this in horror. Her people should know better than to leave a heavily pregnant woman alone, especially when that woman is possessed. She put the talisman on and motioned to Cullen asking when he reached her, “Do you think we could get Selene to Ellendra’s cabin?”

“Shouldn’t we take her back to her husband?” He thought that was the better option.

“Why would he leave her? Were we really kissing for so long that everyone would go to bed and leave the queen here?” Athena paused, “I also want to see if she’s truly in labor.”

“Are you certain you’ll be safe?” Cullen asked.

“The talisman?” Athena wanted clarification that that was what he was talking about. Cullen nodded in answer. Athena smiled at him, “I’ve never seen the like, but I trust Morrigan.”

“Is she being carried or walking?” Cullen inquired. Athena was right, until they found out why the Queen was left alone, it would be best if they cared for her.

“That depends on how much pain she’s in, and if she’s willing to walk.” Athena lowered her voice to a whisper, “If she’s truly in labor she shouldn’t be walking as it’s too soon for the baby to be healthy. But Ellendra didn’t slow down or stop the labor. It was more akin to what I would do for you with your headaches, and that is what has me thinking that the demon is mimicking labor to make Selene weaker.”

“Like Corypheus and his calling,” Cullen whispered.

“Exactly,” Athena turned her attention to the queen, “Your majesty. I think it would be wise if we sought shelter. There’s a storm coming in.”

“There is?” Selene questioned looking over to the east, “So there is.” Selene struggled to get up, before Cullen could reach her she had gotten on her hands and knees and rocked for a bit.

“Allow me to help you up,” Cullen reached down a hand. Selene grabbed hold and pushed off of the ground with the other so she was at least sitting on her heels. As Cullen was helping her to her feet she moaned and squeezed his hand so tight that he almost winced in pain.

“On second thought, it may just be quicker to carry her,” Athena murmured.

“No! I can walk,” Selene breathlessly gasped out. Cullen and Athena looked worriedly at each other as Selene straightened with a hand underneath her belly and her other hand holding onto Cullen. He gently placed his free hand at her back as they started to walk down the hill. 

Halfway down the hill Selene stumbled and pitched forward so much that Cullen had to release her hand to prevent her from falling. Once he was sure that the Queen was on stable footing, he picked her up, “I’m carrying you the rest of the way.”

Athena was walking ahead of them and turned to look back when Selene stumbled. Athena had protectively crossed her arm over her baby bump and mouthed “thank you,” to her husband.

Once inside Ellendra’s cabin, Cullen laid Selene down on the bed. Athena asked, “Your Majesty, I would like to see if the labor is progressing. Do you mind?”

Selene shook her head no, as she gasped for air. Athena lifted up the Queen’s dress and assisted in removing her unmentionables. Athena pressed down on Selene’s large belly to see where the baby was which was rewarded with a kick from the baby and a groan from the mother to be. She then pressed low on the queen’s belly to see where the baby’s head was. Finally, she checked if Selene was ready to give birth. Athena pulled the queen’s dress down and waited until Selene opened her blue eyes, “I think you should see if you can rest. Why was the king not with you?”

“There’s nothing he can do for me,” Selene said in a voice that kind of echoed and then she moaned and gripped the bedclothes.

“Apparently Morrigan has the demon on the run. And what I was thinking was correct. Selene is no where near ready to give birth,” Athena whispered to Cullen and he sighed in relief.

“Inquisitor, can you inform the nurse for Marie that I am ill and she should care for her now?” Selene questioned.

“I can do that. Would you like me to inform the King as well?” Athena fond it odd that Queenie didn’t want her husband.

“No, he is ill,” Selene trailed off moving to her side.

“I’ll see if Varric and Bull are available,” Athena responded as she and Cullen exchanged looks that said the queen wasn’t making any sense. She looked at Cullen, “Unless you want to…”

“No. Go… Also find out why they left her alone,” Cullen opened the door for her, quite perturbed that the Inquisition’s people would leave the queen alone.

“I should stay here in case what Ellendra did doesn’t hold,” Athena was worried.

“It will take you ten minutes at most. She’ll be fine,” Cullen assured her.

“What about you?” Athena whispered.

“I’ll be fine,” he said softly and bent down to kiss her, “now, go.” Cullen gently pushed her out of the door.

Curly was right it took Athena ten minutes to do everything. On her way back with Bull and I, I had to ask, “Why doesn’t Queenie want her husband?”

“She said he was ill,” Athena shrugged, unable to explain it, but then she chastised us, “Why would you leave her alone?”

“What do you mean we left her alone? As soon as Curly saw you he took off like a bullet. The King carried Queenie to their tent and had Kieran with him, Bull and I went off to find some entertainment,” I explained.

“Cullen and I didn’t take that long,” Athena was now wondering what happened to Alistair.

“You took longer than you think,” Bull smirked.

“How would you know?” Athena accused.

“We waited for you two for ten minutes,” I griped.

“Oh,” Duchess blushed, “If she left with the King. Why did we find her by herself?”

We didn’t have an answer for her on that… Upon entering the cabin we heard the queen screeching, “Why did you run from me?!”

“If Selene needs an answer to that. I will answer it for her and her only,” Cullen said calmly.

“Oh, look, it’s your shrew of a wife. Are you sure the child is even yours with all the running around she does?” Selene cackled and then groaned, falling back on to the bed.

“Let’s go,” Curly put an arm around Athena’s shoulders.

Athena looked back at us, “Remember, if the contractions are less than two minutes apart, or if she’s in pain for longer than ten minutes, come and get me.”

“Will do, Boss,” Bull assured her.

As the door closed behind them, Cullen sighed, “It’s almost sunset.”

“My mother!” Athena quickly dashed into their cabin to get the flowers to set free in honor of her mother. 

They went out on to the dock, Cullen stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Athena let the dried flowers loose on the wind and quietly whispered the Maker’s prayer. Cullen was surprised to hear it, “I didn’t know that you knew the Maker’s prayer.”

“My mother taught it to me. When we would go for our walks at sunrise we would leave the circle and walk to this little chantry, and that is where she would pray,” Athena answered softly as tears filled her eyes.

“Why didn’t she use the one in the circle?” Cullen wondered.

“I don’t know,” Athena shrugged as a couple tears escaped.

Cullen gently squeezed her and whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Athena laid her head on his shoulder.

They stood there quietly, watching the sun descend past the horizon, when Cullen quietly spoke, “Did you want to go for that swim now?” 

Athena yawned and sighed wearily, “Not tonight.” 

“Are you all right?” 

“I am. It’s been a long day. I’m tired and my back is starting to ache.”

“You’re not…” Cullen trailed off, not sure how he wanted to show his concern.

Athena turned in his embrace and smiled at him, “Cullen, I’ve been standing, walking, and rushing around since lunch. With the extra weight, I think my back has the right to complain a little.”

“This is normal then?” He asked hopefully.

“Very much so,” Athena chuckled and gasped when he picked her up.

“At least for now you don’t have to do any more walking,” Cullen kissed her. Opening the door to their cabin they were greeted with one of Cullen’s favorite meals along with a small, wrapped package. Cullen accused, “You did this.”

“I’m sorry, love, but you would have found my ability to make this… Lacking,” Athena blushed as he put her down to sit at the table.

“How did you…? What about the gift?” Cullen asked as he sat across from her. They both started eating.

“The cook knew that it didn’t happen last night. And you’ll have to open it to find out,” Athena coyly replied.

“But you weren’t alone for any length of time,” Cullen fingered the gift.

“It doesn’t take that long to wrap a gift. Plus, how do you know that I didn’t bring it here already wrapped?” Athena chuckled.

Cullen took her hand and said hoarsely, “You’ve already given me more than enough.”

“It’s nothing big. I just saw it in a shop and thought of you.”

“What is it?” Cullen asked suspiciously.

“Open it!” Athena laughed.

Cullen sighed and decided to change the subject, wanting to wait until after they were done eating to open the package, “Did you find out why everyone but the Queen disappeared?”

“Varric said that Alistair carried her to their tent, Kieran went with them. Bull and Varric waited on us for ten minutes, and then gave up.”

“Then, why…?”

“I don’t know, maybe we should check on the king?”

“In a bit,” Cullen opened his gift and pulled out a little metal lion. 

Athena said softly, “I guess I should say it reminded me of your helmet.”

Cullen put the lion back in the box and came over to kiss her, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Athena smiled up at him.

Cullen smiled mischievously and chuckled at her squeal as he picked her up, “I am not allowing you to walk anywhere this night.”

“Is that an order, Commander?” Athena teased.

“As one of your advisors consider it a very strong suggestion… As your husband, yes, it’s an order,” Cullen teased back as he carried her to the bed.

“Then I guess I should do my best to follow it,” She said with a sultry glint lighting her violet eyes.

“Good,” Cullen remarked as they undressed. Kissing her as he climbed on top of her and they made love.


	47. Chapter 47

Athena woke in the middle of the night needing to use the garderobe. Gently lifting Cullen’s arm off of her she left the bed and ran to use it. When she came out she saw Cullen sitting up in bed. He raised an eyebrow at her, “I thought we were in agreement that you weren’t to be walking anywhere tonight?”

“You are not carrying me to the garderobe,” Athena got back in to bed.

“Considering how you ran there, I doubt there would have been time anyway,” Cullen gently teased.

“You were awake?” Athena raised herself up on her elbow to look at him. Cullen nodded his head in answer. “Why?”

“Because I couldn’t sleep.”

“Why not?” 

“You need your rest,” Cullen evaded, not wanting to worry her.

“I’m supposed to rest when my husband cannot? Talk to me,” She commanded.

“Athena,” he warned.

She waited for several minutes… until she had to shift to a sitting position because of putting too much pressure on her back, “Cullen, talk to me.”

“Selene’s still being tormented because of Brigidh… And I wonder if I had let her live, would Selene be in this struggle now?” Cullen asked himself.

“You are not responsible for Brigidh’s actions. I would have killed her, but a certain Commander wouldn’t let me,” Athena reminded him.

“That’s because you would have killed yourself before you got to the main hall much less the dungeon,” Cullen was irritated with the reminder. He sighed and sat beside her as he put his arm around her, “As guilty as I feel about what Selene is going through, I am so grateful that you aren’t suffering like her. I also feel as though I should be watching over her instead of Bull and Varric… But you’re my wife, and I want to take care of you more.”

“I understand, Cullen,” Athena said softly.

They sat quietly for a couple minutes and then Cullen hoarsely started with what had really been preying on his mind, “Do you think… The link you had with Selene…” He paused, “Could it have caused the miscarriage?”

Athena closed her eyes against the tears that threatened, “I don’t know, and I really don’t want to think about it.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up,” Cullen berated himself for a fool.

“No, Cullen, I want you to tell me what your thinking. And I’ve thought about it, but it terrifies me… So I try to focus on anything else.” She stopped to smile and placed his free hand on her belly, “Like our baby moving.”

Cullen closed his eyes against the sting of tears and kissed her. Unfortunately the tender moment was interrupted by yours truly… I knocked on the door, “Duchess, you’re needed.”

I waited until I heard a “We’ll be over in a minute,” and rustling. I headed back to Tiny.

Athena and Cullen stood outside the door. Cullen took her hand and asked, “Ready?”

“Should we get Alistair first? Do I have a choice?” Athena asked.

Cullen chuckled softly, “After you fell asleep I had one of the soldiers check on him, he’s sleeping soundly. No… I wish you did, though.”

When they entered they saw Selene tied to the bed. Selene moaned and lifted her head as the door opened, she was able to snarl, “I don’t want that witch touching me!” 

“You don’t get to have a say,” Cullen snarled back.

“Cullen, don’t,” Athena warned.

“Demon or not, there’s no reason to call you names,” he replied in irritation.

Athena sighed. Selene arched her back and screamed in agony. Athena quickly flipped up Selene’s dress to make certain things were the same as before. They were so Athena was able to block the mimicked labor pains. Selene slowly lowered her body back to the bed and whispered, “I am so tired.” 

“Don’t stop fighting, Selene. The demon isn’t going to win. I can take away the physical fatigue, but I’m afraid to cast a sleep spell on you as that might create an opening for the demon,” Athena encouraged her.

“I understand. Do what you can,” Selena said wearily. 

Athena took away the physical fatigue and offered, “You should start feeling better in a couple minutes.”

Cullen pulled Athena to him as soon as she was finished speaking, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. I’ve done those two spells more times than I can count,” Athena reassured him.

“Why is the queen tied up?” Cullen questioned.

“It was at my insistence, Commander. The demon had gained more control and was using my body against me,” Selene was crossing and uncrossing her legs.

“She needs to be untied,” Athena said with certainty.

“Why?” I asked as Bull and I untied her.

“Bull, help her up, please?” Athena implored. Bull did and Selene ran to the garderobe. Athena smirked, “That’s why she needed untied.”

“How has the queen been?” Cullen was looking for a status report.

“In a lot of pain. At times we can’t tell if it’s the demon talking or Selene,” I answered quietly.

“Do you think Morrigan will succeed?” Bull inquired.

“I do and hopefully sooner rather than later,” Athena’s eyes never left the garderobe's door.

“Are you hoping for a boy or girl?” I needed to break the tense silence that had fell over us as we waited on the queen.

“What?” Curly was startled out of watching Athena.

“The child your wife is expecting,” Bull chuckled. “Do you want a boy or girl?”

“I… we…” Cullen paused, “hadn’t really given it much thought.”

“Probably a good time to start thinking about names,” I advised.

“Can we help?” Bull teased.

“We can come up with a list of our own, and bet on it. We’ll have to let Sparkler in on it,” I said. Cullen shook his head in disbelief at us.

Athena didn’t acknowledge us at all. She glanced nervously at Cullen and walked over to the garderobe's door, “Are you all right?”

It took a couple minutes for Selene to respond, “I think… my water broke…” 

Athena threw open the door and Cullen crossed the cabin in quick, long strides. He picked Selene up and carried her to bed while Duchess investigated. She sighed in relief as she closed the door, “It was an hallucination.” Athena got close to the queen, “Selene, you’re fine. The baby is fine, the demon is mimicking that you’re in labor to weaken you.”

The queen shot up to a sitting position and she reached out for Athena with her hand in a claw shape (it looked as though she was going for Duchess’ neck.) She snarled, “The queen is mine. Her child is mine. Soon you and yours will be! You’ll lose the coming child and your husband!” She finished, cackling.

As the demon controlled queen kept reaching out for Athena, the air around Athena had started to glow the closer the she got to her. Athena took the talisman off and looked at it and whispered, “It’s a ward.”

Athena put the talisman back on and helped Selene get to her side. Once Athena released her the queen moaned in agony and curled into a ball. Athena had tears in her eyes as Cullen wrapped his arms around her. She said, “There’s nothing I can do to help her right now. But once Selene is in control again I want to put the talisman on her.”

“Why?” Cullen asked cautiously.

“Because I think it will help Selene stay in control of her body,” Athena whispered.

“And what about you?” Cullen was now very worried.

“If it’s truly Selene, she won’t attack me,” Athena sounded certain.

“That’s not good enough,” Cullen reprimanded.

“I have to try,” Athena whispered fiercely.

“Then I’ll weaken Selene’s magic,” Cullen was trying to find a way to protect his wife and help the queen.

“She’s already weak,” Athena worried that if they made the queen any weaker, the demon would take complete control.

“Athena…” Cullen warned, his worry obvious.

Duchess briefly turned in his embrace. She had to talk louder as the Queen’s moans and groans were getting louder and reaching an almost constant pace, “I will do everything I can to protect myself, but this has to be done quickly. And it appears that Selene isn’t quite ready to give up yet, so why shouldn’t I do everything in my power to help her?”

“Because everything in your power could hurt you,” Cullen reminded her.

Selene finally stilled and slowly sat up. She whispered hoarsely, “Do not harm yourself on my account.” 

Athena jumped out of Cullen’s embrace, quickly taking the talisman off of her neck and placing it around the queen’s. We waited with bated breath for several minutes to see if Selene would change. The air took on a golden hue around her as the demon tried to come back. Selene protectively wrapped her arms around her belly. When the golden hue dimmed, Athena hesitantly asked, “Selene?”

“All is well, my friend. And for the second time I have you to thank for saving me,” Selene smiled.

“Thank Morrigan, she’s the one that gave it to me,” Athena breathed a sigh of relief that it worked.

“But you’re the one that figured it out,” Cullen refused to let Duchess’ contribution go unnoticed.

“Morrigan expected me to figure it out… Otherwise she would have told me immediately what it did,” Athena explained as Selene chuckled and got off the bed.

“Where are you going?” Curly asked the queen.

“The garderobe,” Selene’s answer was calm, almost serene.

“But you were just there,” Cullen was confused.

Selene laughed, “You’ll learn,” and disappeared into the garderobe.

Cullen looked at Athena for an explanation. Athena laughed, “You have two younger siblings, how did you not notice your mother using the water closet frequently?”

“I was outside most of the time,” Cullen blushed.

“Cullen think about it.... Selene’s eight months pregnant,” She paused and smiling wickedly she whispered, “It only gets worse.”

“Maker’s breath!” Curly swore, “I’m going to find breakfast.”

“Good, I’m starving,” Selene said as she slowly came out. She paused for a moment, gripping the doorway.

“Is everything all right?” Athena asked as Cullen left.

“A slight contraction. I’ve been given the impression that it is because of the taint,” Selene sat down at the table.

“I was told that you had found a cure for it?” Athena’s turn to be confused.

“I found something that reduces it drastically, but one needs to take several doses for it to completely be removed and…” Selene trailed off.

“Selene?” Athena sat beside her.

“It would make it so that there would be no other children.” The queen said quietly, “The first dose I had found in Denerim and we were able to get an ingredient list from it to make more but…”

“But you have Marie?" Athena said quietly.

“I always wanted several children,” Selene smiled as the baby kicked.

“Duchess, I hate to interrupt but I’m exhausted,” I complained.

Athena chuckled softly, “We’ll be fine, you two can go. Thank you.”

“I’m staying until Cullen gets back,” Tiny stated.

“Don’t trust me, Bull?” Athena teased. There had been times in the past where Tiny had been more over protective of Duchess than either me or Curly could have attempted. It appeared that Bull was “mother henning” it… If only Krem could see him now.

“You know that isn’t the case, Boss,” Bull warned and promptly fell asleep.

Athena chuckled, “I understand.”

I had to tease Tiny, “Is the mighty Bull practicing for when Ruffles is with child?”

Athena laughed and quickly jumped in before I woke Tiny to retell it and have him launch me into the lake, “Varric, you would make an excellent mother.”

“You’re lucky I like you, Duchess,” I grumbled and kicked Tiny on the way out as he had dozed off and missed my comment. The kick woke him up.

“Your friends get along as well as mine did,” Selene chuckled.

“Varric likes to torment. They are, at times, inseparable and impossible,” Athena had nothing but love for her unruly companions.

“You should have heard him last night,” Bull complained.

“Josie hasn’t changed you that much, Bull,” Athena teased.

“Josephine hasn’t changed me at all,” Bull grumbled. (It’s a shame Tiny isn’t embarrassed by anything.)

Athena laughed. Selene smiled, “A qunari warrior helped me defeat the fifth blight.”

“Sten of the Beresaad?” Bull questioned.

“You know him?” Selene was surprised.

“We met, once. In a bar in Seheron…” Bull smiled at the memory.

“Oh no,” Athena sighed.

“What’s the sigh for, Boss?” Bull was confused, Duchess always gave the impression of enjoying his stories.

“Because this story could be a really brutal one,” Athena warned.

“I have good stories from Seheron,” Bull griped.

“I’ve never heard one from you,” she teased.

“This is a good one. Sten was traveling with several other Beresaad. I had just been sent to Seheron and we met in a tavern where there were some friendly challenges going on. The Beresaad don’t drink…” Bull paused to take a drink.

Athena closed her eyes and whispered, “Andraste preserve us.” Selene’s belly rumbled loudly and Duchess was getting hungry as well. When she opened her eyes she said brightly, “I’m going to see what’s keeping my husband.”

As Athena left Bull called after her, “This is why you never get to hear any good stories about Seheron.”

“I think your “good” stories are worse than the brutal ones,” Athena called back. Bull laughed so hard he shook the little cabin.

“I take it the Inquisitor is correct?” Selene was trying to hide that she was having another contraction by pushing down on the bench she was sitting on with one hand and rubbing her belly with the other. She was also slightly glowing.

Bull remarked about the glow, “We should find out what magic is imbued in that talisman and put it on everything.” Selene laughed and Tiny continued his story about Sten.

Athena found Kieran first as he ran up and hugged her. Athena hugged him back, “How are you?”

“The soldiers are teaching me to play cards! My mother is trying to help the queen?” He asked.

“She is. Hopefully she will be back soon,” Athena put an arm around his shoulders as they started walking, “Have you seen Cullen? Or the king?”

“Cullen said he was getting breakfast and walked that way,” Kieran pointed toward the tents. “The king was still sleeping when I left this morning.”

“He was still sleeping?” Athena found this very odd. Kieran shrugged his shoulders in answer. She sighed and smiled at the boy, “Would you like to come with me?”

“Yes!” Kieran jumped excitedly. 

Athena laughed and they walked with the soldiers alternately bowing and murmuring “Inquisitor” as she passed by. Cullen was in the center of the tents talking to some soldiers. Athena looked ruefully at Kieran, “He never stops.”

“I most certainly do,” Cullen rolled up the maps they were looking at and handed them off to a soldier on his right. Cullen walked over to them, ruffled Kieran’s hair who playfully growled and smoothed his hair back down. Putting an arm around Athena, he asked, “Why aren’t you eating breakfast with the Queen?”

“What breakfast?” Athena asked, confused.

“I told the cook to send you breakfast,” Cullen was just as confused.

“It never arrived,” Athena remarked.

“I wonder why…” Cullen trailed off as the cook hailed them.

“How was breakfast?” The cook asked.

“It never arrived,” Cullen tried to not sound irritated as he hoped it was just a misunderstanding.

“Nonsense! I took it to your cabin myself!” The cook exclaimed.

Athena laughed, now understanding the confusion, “I’m sorry, we had a friend that needed our assistance overnight and we haven’t been back to our cabin yet.”

“It shouldn’t be too cold yet,” the cook said as he went off to see to others.

“We should let everyone else know, and wake the King,” Cullen remarked.

“It’s only the queen and Bull now. Varric wanted to leave. I want to check on Ellendra, Morrigan, and Dorian,” Athena informed him.

“Do you want me to go back with the soldiers?” Kieran offered.

“I think it will be all right if you eat breakfast with us,” Athena smiled at him.

“In a month Kieran’s going to be taller than you,” Cullen teased.

“Cullen!” Athena was shocked. Kieran laughed.

“It’s just an observation, he’s already taller than Varric,” Cullen feigned innocence.

“He’s still not wider than me!” I yelled after them.

"When Athena’s nine months pregnant she won’t be wider than you!” Curly called back.

“Evil, Curly, that’s just evil,” I said as I laughed. 

Duchess sighed in exasperation and went to check on how Morrigan was doing. Cullen sent a soldier to wake the King. When they met back up Cullen was still smiling smugly as they entered Ellendra’s cabin. Bull finished his story, “We all ended up drunk, fighting each other, and singing.”

Selene laughed and gasped slightly, “When I write Sten next, I now know how to embarrass him.”

“What’d you do to the boss, Commander?” Bull raised his eyebrow as he noticed Athena’s blush.

“I gave her a compliment,” Cullen teased his love.

“By bringing up how wide I’m going to be in a few months?” Athena found that to be quite backhanded.

“Varric’s not with child. He should be keeping himself in shape,” Cullen explained himself, seeing the error of his ways.

“If anyone should be getting payback it should be me. All the boss said was that I was allowed. She had no idea what I was going to say or do,” Bull came to Duchess’ defense.

Athena shook her head, “Breakfast was served in our cabin. Care to join me and Kieran, Selene?”

“I think I would enjoy that.” Selene stood and stretched her back, “Your wife is kinder than I am, Commander. when Alistair joked about how wide I was going to be I threw sparks at him.”

Athena and Selene hooked arms after they were through the door talking quietly. Once inside the cabin Selene said as she sat down, “Kieran, I know we haven’t been able to spend a lot of time together with all of my health issues and I am sorry for that.”

“It’s all right, Your Majesty,” Kieran said shyly almost hiding in Athena’s side (it wasn’t very effective considering he was up to her shoulder.)

“Please call me Selene?” She pressed a hand against her lower back. Kieran nodded and smiled.

Cullen and Bull came in at that point. With Bull saying, “I’m surprised Josephine isn’t after me for fittings for the wedding.”

“She probably had you measured in your sleep,” Cullen groused.

“You may be right,” Tiny barked out a laugh.

Athena was going through her bags and didn’t notice her husband standing behind her. He asked, “Athena, why aren’t you eating?”

Athena jumped, and turned swiftly to face him, “I’m looking for something!”

“It can wait until after you eat,” Cullen reprimanded.

Athena growled in response and returned to her searching. Bull guffawed. Selene chuckled, “Surely it can wait, Athena.”

“Found it!” Athena pulled out a wide belt and carried it with her to the table, “One of the maids brought this to me. I believe it belongs to you.” Athena laid the belt in between her and Selene.

Selene sighed in relief, “My belt.”

“And this belt was so important for you to wait on eating?” Cullen cocked an eyebrow at Athena.

“He hasn’t noticed you forgetting anything yet?” Selene softly chuckled.

“Apparently not…” Athena filled a plate with food.

“He will, it drives Alistair insane because he’s normally the forgetful one.” Selene paused, “Cullen, once I started gaining weight with this pregnancy I got horrible back aches. The belt helps support my back so I’m not confined to a bed.”

“How much of that was the demon controlling you though?” Cullen asked gently.

“The demon isn’t controlling me now, and it’s taking everything I have to not cry out in pain,” Selene gripped her fork tightly.

Athena stopped eating and stood, “Are you able to walk?”

“I think so…” Selene stood, “yes.”

Athena laid the belt over her arm and hooked Selene's arm with hers, “Then we’re going to get this on you right now.”

“Athena…” Cullen worried far too much.

“Cullen, all we are doing is going next door. If something happens to either one of us, I’m sure you’ll be able to hear it,” Athena reprimanded as they walked out of the door.

Once the door was shut behind them Selene chuckled, “He seems quite protective.”

“Cullen worries too much. I understand why, but…” Athena trailed off as they slowly walked to Ellendra’s cabin.

“You were pregnant before this?” Selene asked gently.

“Yes,” Athena’s voice caught on pain that was still raw and open.

“What happened?”

“It was lost,” Athena fought tears.

Selene opened the door and gently spoke, “I cannot imagine what you went through, continue to go through. You have my sympathy.”

“Thank you. It looks as though your maids brought some of your clothing here. Would you like to change?” Athena asked as Selene sat down heavily on a chair, her breathing a little ragged. Athena waited patiently for an answer as the air around Selene started to glow again, "The talisman seems to be keeping the demon away. How are you feeling?”

“Exhausted. But I am in control of my body, the hallucinations, fog, and the constant pain are gone. I hope Morrigan is able to defeat it soon. I would love clean clothes,” Selene answered. 

“Are you able to stand?” Athena inquired.

“In a moment,” Selene arched her back and pressed both hands into her lower back, “I swear I’m carrying more than one child.”

Athena chuckled, “I understand.”

“Oh?” Selene slowly stood, using the back of the chair to assist her.

“I only made it two and a half months with the first pregnancy, and I just seem to be growing at a faster rate than other women that I’ve known,” Athena put her hands under her belly so her dress would be tight against it.

“You look like I did at two and a half months.” Selene put a hand underneath her large belly and walked over to the table to pick out a dress, “I hate to ask this, but they make all of my dresses tie in the back. Would you help me?”

“Certainly,” Athena walked over and undid the laces as Selene leaned forward to grip the bench, “another contraction?” (Selene wasn’t glowing this time,) she nodded her head, “How often have you had them in the past hour?”

“Not counting the demon ones?” Selene gasped out.

“Not counting the mimicked ones,” Athena reiterated, undoing the last lace.

“That was the first one that strong, I’ve had small ones, which I thought was because of the taint…” Selene trailed off as she stood and started pulling her dress down. She hissed in pain when the tight parts of the dress scraped against her belly.

Athena heard and walked to stand in front of the queen and saw the claw marks on her belly, “Sweet Andraste, Selene! Why didn’t you say anything?!”

“This,” She motioned at her belly, “was why I had your friends tie me up.”

“Do you want me to heal them?” Duchess offered as Queenie took off her underclothes.

“I can’t ask you to do that,” Selene refused, stepping out of her pool of clothing.

“Your not asking. I am offering.”

“Forgive me for sounding a bit like your husband, but they will heal in time and I do not want you doing anything that may harm you or your child.” Selene picked up a bra, “Even though I’m told otherwise, I think these contraptions make my back pain worse.”

“Healing scratches will not harm me or my child. Don’t wear it,” Athena responded.

Selene nodded her head in acquiescence to Athena healing her. Athena healed her silently as Selene pressed her hands deep into her pained back. Athena handed her the belt and they adjusted it to where Queenie felt she would gain the most relief. 

Selene needed to sit down and she started glowing again, “You would think that once the demon was found it would be a simple matter to kill it.”

“She keeps running back to you, and when she can’t get to you she probably tries to find another place in the Fade to hide,” Athena guessed.

“It’s what I had to do with Connor,” Selene sighed as she pulled on her under garment.

“How many children would you like to have?” Athena tried to get Selene to talk of happier things.

“As many as I can,” Selene chuckled.

“You don’t have a set number?” 

“With the taint, it’s almost impossible to become pregnant,” Selene put on her dress with Athena assisting her.

“I’m sorry,” Athena couldn’t imagine the heartache of being told that.

“Nothing for you to be sorry for. I always wanted to have several children.” Selene smiled.

“Several?” Athena chuckled, thinking that she loved children, but how would you play with that many?

“Alistair doesn’t want more than five,” Selene laughed and then winced as the baby kicked her in the ribs. Placing her hand on the spot, she asked, “What about you and Cullen?

“We haven’t really discussed it,” Athena answered as they walked to the door… Where Curly was standing.

“Discussed what?” He questioned.

Athena shook her head, said only, “Spy,” and slid past him.

Selene chuckled, “In another couple weeks she won’t be able to do that.”

“Call me a spy? She does that on at least a weekly basis,” Cullen groused.

Selene outright laughed, “No, slide past you like she is nothing.”

“I still haven’t received an answer,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena laughed and kissed him, “We’ll talk about it later.”

“Promise?” Cullen requested.

“I promise.”

“Is everything all right? You took a very long time…” Cullen was concerned.

“Cullen, when your eight months pregnant, everything takes a long time,” Selene rested a hand on the top of her belly as he opened the door.

“Now will you two eat?” His tone spoke of exasperation.

Athena noticed there was a lot less food and that it was different, “This isn’t the same food.”

“That’s how long you two took. The food got cold,” Cullen griped, “I wasn’t sure why you weren’t eating.”

“I was eating,” Athena challenged, she thought: I’m constantly eating now and he still worries that I’m not eating!

“I know you were. Selene wasn’t,” Cullen explained.

“I’m feeling better now and I’m starving,” Selene filled a plate with food and sat down to eat.

Athena noticed Bull and Kieran were missing, “Where’s Kieran and Bull?”

“Kieran was bored so Bull offered to wrestle with him,” Cullen informed her. Athena looked like she was ready to drop. “Are you all right?”

“Cullen, I’m fine. Our baby is fine. Please worry a little less?” Athena implored as he locked his hands at the small of her back and pulled her to him.

“I’ll try,” Curly said softly and kissed her. “Is there a reason you aren’t joining Selene?”

“I’m not hungry for what’s there,” Athena laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes. Sighing contentedly, she murmured, “I still have a chocolate chip cookie stash.”

Cullen shook his head at her response and kissed the top of her head. They stood like that for quite some time as Selene went back for seconds, thirds, fourths... As Selene was finishing up Curly felt Athena start to droop. He asked softly, “Athena?”

“She’s asleep, Cullen,” Selene whispered as she arched her back and pressed the heels of her hands into her lower back. 

Cullen picked Athena up and carried her to bed. Of course her heavy brunette hair fell in her face and he moved it so she could breathe. He stood there and watched Duchess sleep for a minute. Selene said softly, “She is an amazing woman.”

“She is. She would give anything for anyone if she believed their heart to be true,” Cullen said quietly, his voice full of reverence for his wife. “At times I wish she wouldn’t… But then she wouldn’t be the woman I love.”

“You aren’t exactly selfish or arrogant either,” Selene reminded him as she quietly moved plates out of the way so she could have some support for her back.

“I have a past that isn’t pretty or likable,” his voice was quiet as he carried a chair closer to Selene and helped her up so she could sit in it.

Sighing in relief once she was sitting Selene commented, “Don’t we all? But the past is what makes us who we are today. We see things that we did wrong and we correct them… Or at least give it a good shot.” 

“Considering who and what I was… For years anger blinded me. At times it still does. Athena sees through all of that… Even when I can’t,” Cullen gently sat down on the bed.

Selene smiled, “I’m sure you do the same for her.”

“I try to.”

Selene gasped and gripped the arms of the chair as a contraction hit. Breathing through it she said, “Her answer would differ from try.”

“I thought the talisman stopped the contractions?” Cullen’s voice was full of concern.

“The talisman doesn’t stop the real ones,” Selene was breathing easier now that the pain had passed.

“How can you tell the difference?” Cullen grabbed a small throw pillow for Selene’s back. Which she gratefully accepted and put the pillow at the base of her back.

“With the ones the demon was using I always felt as though I was being pulled away. Or I would have to fight through a fog to get back. With the pains I’m having now, there is none of that. I’ve had contractions through out the pregnancy. Now that they’re getting stronger means I’m getting closer to that time. They’re still too infrequent to be called labor though,” the queen explained. “Cullen, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” Cullen felt as though he should be wary, but not sure why.

“All those years ago at the circle tower… Why did you run from me?” She had to know.

“Because I was young. I was trying to be the ‘good’ templar. I also thought I had no chance of you even looking at me much less flirting with me. Which you did… with everyone,” Cullen teased.

Selene laughed softly, “I guess I did, but you were the one I was attracted to, and you ran from me!”

Cullen chuckled as he absent mindedly rubbed his sleeping wife’s back, “I think it worked out for the best.”

“That it did, my friend, that it did,” Selene yawned deeply, “Athena looks so peaceful.”

“You’re afraid to go to sleep, aren’t you?”

“Terrified,” Selene stated baldly as she stood and walked swiftly to the garderobe.

Cullen put his hand on Athena’s belly wishing that he would feel something. Watching his wife sleep he lost track of time until Queenie broke him out of his reverie by opening the door. She was glowing and breathless. Cullen left his wife’s side to help her, “I am sorry, I got lost in my thoughts.”

She accepted Cullen’s assistance to slowly walk back to the chair she was sitting in, “You have nothing to apologize for. I thought the scene before me was so beautiful that I couldn’t help but watch and I got lost in my own thoughts.” When she sat down she alternately rubbed and pressed against her belly, she murmured, “There are times that I wish they wouldn’t be so active.”

“They?” Cullen sat beside Athena again.

“I believe there’s more than one in there,” Selene winced as the baby punched a sensitive spot, “Did you feel anything?” Cullen shook his head in answer, blushing slightly for being caught in a tender moment. “Give it another fortnight, possibly a month and you’ll be able to… So long as the baby cooperates.”

“I don’t understand?”

Selene chuckled softly, “Alistair has yet to feel the baby or babies move. They will be incredibly active until he puts his hand on my belly and then they stop. He gets so frustrated.”

Cullen chuckled, “That’s cruel,” and then he said softly as he placed his hand on Athena’s belly, “Don’t get any ideas, little one.” He looked over at the queen, “Athena said that Ellendra thinks she may be carrying twins.”

“When Ellendra comes back from watching over Morrigan, I hope she can tell with me,” Selene leaned to her side.

**

Athena woke to both Cullen and Selene sleeping. Chuckling softly she got out of bed and changed clothes quietly. There was a knock at the door and she opened it to the cook bringing in dinner. The cook was so quiet that he didn’t disturb Cullen or Selene. Athena chuckled, and said softly, “I think my husband will want you to come back to Skyhold with us.”

“I’ve noticed how loud your staff can get. They do that when people are sleeping as well?” The cook asked.

“I don’t know about others but they’ve woken me several times,” Athena said softly, “Thank you”.

“You are quite welcome, Your Worship,” the cook left quietly.

Selene groaned upon waking, “I smell food.”

Athena laughed, “That’s because it’s time for dinner. How did you sleep?”

“Peacefully,” Selene marveled at her answer as she hoisted herself out of the chair and made her way to the garderobe.

“You sound surprised,” Athena watched Cullen roll over in his sleep.

“It’s been many years since I have been able to sleep without nightmares. We need to ask Morrigan where she found this thing,” Selene said quietly as she stood in the doorway of the garderobe. When she came back out her stomach rumbled loudly which made Athena laugh. The queen griped, “You’re not being very kind to your husband by laughing so loud.”

“I’ve found that when he is in a sound sleep only my kissing him will wake him or he will wake up on his own.”

“It must be nice to be able to move around without disturbing the ones you love,” Selene was envious. 

Athena chuckled as she got her staff and armor, “Alistair is a light sleeper?”

“If I shift in bed he sits up and asks, “What is it? What’s wrong?” And then because he’s wide awake he wakes me up!” Selene filled her plate and then gasped, “The spell! The demon put a spell on Alistair!”

Athena chuckled, “It’s all right, it’s just a sleep spell, I’m going to go wake him up. I’m sure Cullen feels the same way about me. I have always been a light sleeper.”

“Not anymore you're not. How long have you been awake?” Cullen rumbled from the bed causing the ladies to gasp.

Athena threw a pillow at him, and accused, “Spy!”

Selene’s laugh was cut short by a gasp of pain. Athena rolled her eyes at the attempt of the queen to sit at the table to eat. Cullen got up, took her plate from her, and commanded the queen to sit in the chair she had occupied earlier.

Pressing against her lower back she said, “Once I’m able to stand, certainly.”

Athena stopped what she was doing to turn and ask, “That bad?” Selene nodded, gasping in short bursts. Athena sat down beside the Queen, “Take slow breaths.”

“It’s not the demon?” Cullen saw Athena’s staff and armor laid out.

“Morrigan said that the next battle should be the last one. She also warned that the demon had control of some bandits as well,” Athena said softly as she rubbed the queen’s back.

“You need to eat,” Cullen commanded Athena.

“I am!” She held up a chocolate chip cookie for him to see.

“That’s not a meal,” Curly reprimanded.

“It’s what I want! When I woke up I was hungry and dinner wasn’t here yet.”

“Cullen, her obsession with cookies is a craving, you aren’t going to win,” Selene slowly stood and made her way to the chair.

“What’s yours?” Athena happily bit into her cookie. It was nice to have someone on her side about eating for once.

“Depends on the day, but the constant ones are chocolate and mint. Normally, I don’t care for either, but right now I can’t get enough of it,” Selene lowered herself into the chair and sighed in relief.

Athena got up, brushing off her hands, and started walking around the table looking for something. She got a plate and started filling it with mint chocolate brownies. Cullen noticed, “Athena!”

Athena walked them over to the queen daring Curly to say something. Selene’s eyes got wide and she whispered as she took the plate, “Oh, Maker.”

Cullen shook his head and changed the subject, “Why is your armor out?”

“Because I need to wake Alistair from the spell the demon put on him, and Morrigan is certain that we’ll be attacked by demon controlled bandits when she fights the demon next,” Athena explained.

“What help do you need?” Selene asked.

“Armor that fits,” Athena murmured.

Selene gave a short bark of laughter that ended in, “ow.”

“I’m going to let the soldiers know that they’re needed,” Cullen informed them.

Before he left Athena requested, “Send Varric and Kieran in here please?”

“Can you have Marie and her nurse come in her as well?” Selene asked.

“What about the King?” Athena inquired.

“He will most likely want to fight,” Selene spoke softly.

“I will,” Cullen kissed Athena, “protect yourself.”

“I will,” Athena assured him as he left to get all hands on deck.

“I don’t know if I’ll get a chance later, but, thank you Athena,” Selene said softly.

“I’m just glad I can help,” Athena bent down to hug her. “Can you use your magic with the talisman on?”

“I may be a bit rusty,” Selene held out her hand to make a fireball.

“Why?” Athena asked.

“Maybe it was the demon, but every time I tried to use magic, the contractions would get worse.” Selene explained as the fireball came to life in her hand. She grew it a little before she waved her other hand over it to dispel it.

Athena kept an eye on Selene as she put on her armor. Once Athena was as fully outfitted as she could be (the breast plate no longer fit,) Selene moaned gripping the sides of the chair and leaning forward. Athena said softly, “Too much time has passed for this one to be because of your abilities.”

“That is good to know,” Selene gasped out.

Kieran, Marie, Marie’s nurse, and I walked in at the end of the contraction. I said, “uh oh.”

“This is semi-normal…” Athena waited for the Queen’s breathing to return to normal before leaving.

“Go, we’ll be fine,” Selene said to Athena.

Athena gave me a look I know all too well and I nodded in understanding. Athena said to Kieran, “There are books in my satchel if you would like to read them. We’ll be back soon.” And with that she left.

She made her way to the king first, waking him from his magic induced sleep. When he was fully awake, Duchess explained everything. Selene was right, he wanted to fight. He let Duchess know that she could go ahead and he would follow when he was ready.

Athena weaved her way through the soldiers to the center where Cullen was standing. He looked at her like he wanted to say something but thought better of it, “How is the king?”

“He’s awake and should be joining us shortly.”

“You should go back to the queen,” Cullen wanted Athena out of harm’s way. He also knew that Duchess could protect everyone in there, he wasn't so sure she could do the same out in the open.

A low howl surrounded the camp. Athena smiled sadly at her husband as the first clashes of the battle were being heard, “There isn’t time.”

Bull fought back to back with her as much as he could. The first wave of bandits was ended quickly.

**

In the cabin we listened anxiously to the fighting outside. To her credit the queen tried to keep up a light conversation asking me, “How long have you known Athena and Cullen?”

“I met Curly back in Kirkwall. I was a prisoner much like Duchess was until we found out that she could close the rifts,” I answered.

“How did you become her best friend and bodyguard?” Selene inquired.

“To hear her tell it, it was because I treated her as human instead of something to be worshipped.” I chuckled, “She’d be incredibly cross with me if she knew the truth. The bodyguard thing came along after she and Curly would awkwardly flirt, get lost staring at each other, and blush when they got caught.”

Selene chuckled, “The truth?”

“The truth is that I think she was sent by Andraste. From the sound of her childhood she shouldn’t have made it to adulthood, but she did. She shouldn’t have survived the journey from Ostwick to the conclave, but she did. And then ancient elven magic links itself to her hand. Saved the wardens, an empress, fought an ancient darkspawn magister from the dawn of time, saved a queen, fought off a qunari invasion,” I paused to get a drink. Just talking about all she’s done is thirst inducing and exhausting.

“Not once but twice,” Selene stood to walk around a bit.

I chuckled, “True… There were so many times that I thought she would fail or die trying, and she succeeded against the odds and survived. If there isn’t the hand of the Maker or Andraste in there somewhere, then they don’t exist.”

“I understand,” Selene went in to the garderobe. I heard her moan slightly as she closed the door. I went to stand outside of it to listen. Thankfully the other three were asleep. When Selene opened the door several minutes later I scared her by standing there. She jumped and placed a hand over her heart, “Varric! You startled me!”

“I heard you moan going in and wanted to make sure you were all right,” I remarked as we both went back to sitting.

“Thank you,” Selene said as the fighting seemed to abate outside. We looked at each other hopefully. After several minutes the fighting renewed with fresh ferocity.

Within fifteen minutes of the second wave Marie was awake and crying. Her nurse was sleeping through it. Kieran woke to her crying and murmured, “She’s hungry.”

Selene had started to get up to get her when a contraction hit and she had to lower herself back in to the chair. Kieran took Marie from beside the nurse and played with her until the Queen was ready for her. Selene took Marie from Kieran with a breathless, “Thank you.” The queen laid her head against the back of the chair and closed her eyes as Marie ate. It could have been my imagination, but I thought I saw a tear or two escape Queenie’s closed eyes.

Once Marie had been fed and changed she wanted to play for a bit which Kieran happily took over. Selene would alternately pace, have a contraction, and sit down until it passed. On one such pacing, she said, “I’m not used to being away from the action.”

“Well, Queenie, I think you’ve had enough action lately, and I think everyone else would agree with me,” I commented.

“Hasn’t Athena had enough action lately?” Selene pressed the heels of her hands into her back.

“If there had been time, I think she’d be in here with us,” I said sadly.

“The hero’s job is never done,” Selene responded and then she ran to the bathroom. Several minutes later she came out and complained, “This child really needs to stop kicking my bladder.”

I chuckled as the queen went back to her pacing.

**

During the lull Cullen went to check on Athena. He took her hands and led her away from the crush of the crowd he asked, “How are you?”

Athena was a little breathless from fighting and sat on a rock, “I’m fine. Bull and I are fighting back to back. How are you?”

Cullen smiled at her description, “Is it too much to hope that there is enough time to get you back to Selene?”

Athena stood to quickly kiss him as that low roar was heard again, “I love you.” 

“I love you, too. Protect yourself, please?” Cullen begged.

“I will,” they parted with a brief kiss and went back to their positions to await the second wave. Which came mere moments after they took up their positions. The fighting was intense and brutal where they barely had time to breathe.

Athena heard Bull grunt as he took a hard hit. She started to turn to see if he was okay and Bull roared, “Keep your back to me, Boss!” 

Athena did as commanded. They fought for well over an hour before the demons were defeated. Fortunately, Ellendra had told Sparkler to join the fray and he met up with Duchess and Tiny. Athena was leaning heavily on her staff and breathing hard. Dorian put an arm around her and led her to a rock to sit. “Maybe you should stay out of the fighting until the battle is done?”

Athena nodded and breathlessly agreed, “I think you may be right.”

Cullen ran over when he saw Athena sitting and Dorian standing over her, “What happened?”

“She’s out of shape,” Sparkler lightly teased.

“Ha ha,” Athena said as her breathing normalized, “the only time we had hour long battles were when we fought dragons.”

“Corypheus was hours long,” Sparkler said brightly, “I’ll leave you in the capable hands of your husband.”

“He’s more likely to stick me in a cabin and lock me in,” she grumbled. Sparkler laughed as he walked away.

“If I thought there was time to do it, I would,” Cullen said softly, decidedly not in a teasing mood. He crouched in front of her, “Are you all right?”

“I’m not injured, Cullen. I’m just tired,” Athena sighed heavily, “Dorian’s right, I’m out of shape.”

“You are not out of shape. You’re four and a half months pregnant. This battle is tiring for everyone. Why don’t you see what Varric and Selene are up to?” Cullen tried for a third time to get his pregnant wife away from the battle.

Athena laid her staff down to place her hand on the rock and stretch out her back, “To do that would require moving. Which I’m not sure that I’m up for… And by the time I can move, those things will be on us again. Plus, I can, at the very least, provide extra armor. I can’t do that if I’m locked in a cabin.” (The bandits looked half human, half demon.)

Cullen sighed heavily. He kissed her briefly and motioned to Dorian and Bull and a handful of soldiers. He explained, “The Inquisitor is to be protected at all times. Do not engage the enemy unless they come at you.” He turned back to Athena, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Cullen?” Athena asked, confused.

“If you cannot defend yourself, I am defending you,” He whispered kissing her briefly and ran off to let the soldiers he was with to know what to do. Cullen came back just in time for the next wave.

Athena cast barrier over everyone that was surrounding her, wishing she had enough strength to do it for everyone fighting. The third wave was even more intense than the previous one but fortunately for those that fought the previous two battles. Two additional bodies came to assist with the fighting. Cullen said a terse, “Morrigan made it,” for Athena because she was still sitting down.

Athena breathed a sigh of relief and cast barrier on everyone she felt she safely could, and waited for the fighting to be over. Roars went up from the soldiers as the last bandit was slain. Athena stood with help from Cullen and he didn’t let go. She smiled up at him in gratitude.

Hearing the celebration Selene and I rushed out of the cabin along with Kieran. Marie was being held by her nurse. Alistair took off his helmet and ran to his wife and child. Kieran ran to his mother who whispered gently, “Oh, my boy.” 

Ellendra walked over to Athena and Cullen. Athena spoke first, “Thank you, Ellendra.”

Ellendra watched Duchess for a while before she answered, “My cabin, now.” Ellendra walked away fully expecting them to follow and came upon a doubled over Queenie who was gasping for air. Ellendra looked at the king and said, “My cabin, now.”

Once inside Ellendra’s cabin Athena refused to go first saying, “The most I am is tired and sore. I’m assuming the Queen’s contractions are only getting worse.”

“That they are, my friend,” Selene gasped out as she was carried in by her husband and laid on the bed. Selene moaned upon being laid on her back and rolled to her side.

Ellendra pressed against Queenie’s belly to see where the baby was. Ellendra paused, “Athena have you…?”

“I wasn’t sure,” Athena answered quietly.

“What’s wrong?” Alistair was nervous and pacing.

“It’s nothing bad, Alistair. It’s just something I don’t know how to do,” Athena tried to calm him.

Ellendra smiled, keeping her hand on Selene’s belly to feel for when the contraction relaxed, “Your Majesty, I would like to use a little magic on you. I think you are having more than one child, and it may be why your back has been bothering you so much. If you’ll allow me I would like to “see.”” Selene nodded and started to roll on her back and hissed in pain.

“She needs a pillow and a rather large one,” Athena quietly told Alistair. He fumbled around for one and not finding any, he slid his arm underneath her.

“It’s a good thing you’ve never met a pillow you didn’t like,” Cullen teased Athena by whispering in her ear (easy to do considering she was sitting on his lap.)

“Leave me and my pillows alone. You use them too!” 

“You brought ten along with you,” Cullen grumbled, still teasing.

Athena took his hand and placed it on her expanded belly, “I’m pregnant with your child.”

“How many pillows did you travel with before you defeated Corypheus?” He caressed her belly and smiled at her.

“I was sleeping on the ground! I didn’t have a former templar around to put up my cot!” Athena was exasperated.

Cullen laughed and kissed her, “I love you.”

Athena sighed heavily, “I guess I love you too.” 

“You guess?!” That was not the answer Curly was expecting.

“Bringing up how wide I’m going to be in a couple months and now teasing me about my pillows? Yes, I guess is correct,” Athena chuckled.

“Wife,” Cullen growled, blushing.

“Very cute you two. Athena, I still want to check you out even though you seem fine. But now, I need you to hush.” Ellendra ordered.

The royal couple chuckled softly. Alistair caressed his wife’s brown hair, “We used to tease each other like that.”

“What do you mean used to? You still tease me mercilessly,” Selene responded.

“I used to either make you blush or have words thrown back at me. Now I get sparks thrown at me,” Alistair grumbled.

Selene chuckled softly, “I will admit that my abilities have been off for the past couple years.”

Ellendra softly said a spell and waved her hands over the queen’s large belly and closed her eyes to see inside. The queen had a contraction while Ellendra was doing her thing. Selene bit her lip to keep from crying out. Alistair took hold of her hand and she squeezed like there was no tomorrow. When Ellendra was finished she opened her eyes and smiled at the royals, “You’re having triplets.”

Alistair paled, “Is that possible?”

Selene had started to move to sit up, certain her weight on Alistair’s arm was hurting him. Ellendra saw and said, “Do not move, Your Majesty, we are not quite finished. I want to make sure that you aren’t in labor.” Selene stopped moving. Ellendra smiled and offered her thanks.

After checking to see if the queen was in labor Ellendra said, “Even though you’re having contractions you aren’t ready to give birth. However, if you still intend on going to Denerim, I am certain you will give birth before you reach your destination.”

“That’s a terrifying thought,” Alistair quipped nervously.

“There’s not enough room to house all of us here for at least the next month,” Selene said as Alistair helped her to sit up.

“What about Skyhold?” Cullen asked quietly, holding a sleeping Athena.

“That depends on when they leave. Skyhold is closer, but if they wait even a week more it’s that much more likely that the labor will start in earnest.”

“Right now everyone needs a decent rest. Why don’t we discuss it more when we’ve had some sleep?” Cullen suggested.

“A very wise idea,” Alistair commented.

“What about the back pain?” Selene pressed against her back once again.

“The sharp pains in your back are actually contractions. The dull ache is because of carrying three instead of one. There are some herbs I can give you to ease the pain, but I advise that you use them sparingly.” Ellendra informed her.

“Why?” Selene asked.

“Because in rare pregnancies it can bring on early labor if they are used in excess,” Ellendra answered.

“I think I’ll just deal with the pain,” Selene sighed as she slowly got off the bed and winced as her feet touched the ground.

“I think it would be wise if you allowed me to carry you, just this once?” Alistair asked… Commanded. Selene was supporting her belly with one hand and herself with her other gripping the bed as she was sliding down to the floor she nodded her head unable to speak. Alistair picked her up and questioned, “What about the contractions?”

“That is a mystery to me. It is the only sign that she is in labor. As far as she is, it’s not unusual to have contractions, but their intensity and frequency are of someone that should be close to being in labor if not active labor. The only thing we could do is try to bring on labor early, but then you would be stuck here until the babies are ready to travel.” Ellendra explained, “Once we’re decided on a destination, she should rarely leave her bed.”

Alistair nodded to Ellendra and Cullen as he left with Selene in his arms. Cullen carried his sleeping wife to Ellendra’s bed. Ellendra checked Athena and of course everything was fine, “The sleeping ones are always the easiest. She may be a little sore tomorrow, but her and the baby are fine.”

“Athena had mentioned that you thought she was pregnant with twins?” Cullen asked.

“Did she?” Ellendra secretly smiled.

“What makes you think that?” Cullen let his curiosity get the best of him.

“She’s a little larger than normal and from what she described to me about how active the movement is, makes me think that there’s two,” Ellendra answered.

“Could you do to Athena what you did to the Queen?” Curly felt like he needed to know now.

“Once she’s farther along, yes. Now, as you said earlier, we all need some sleep,” Ellendra smiled at him as he picked up his sleeping wife and went to their cabin.

When Cullen laid Athena down he took off her armor very carefully, praying he wouldn’t wake her. Once all of her armor was off she rolled to her side and murmured his name still sound asleep. He took off his armor and got into bed with her. Placing a hand on the front of her extended belly, Curly finally allowed himself to sleep.

**

Athena woke with the sunrise and groaned. Everything ached but she knew it was pointless to stay in bed so she got up and slowly got dressed, chuckling softly as she noticed that Cullen piled her armor the exact way he does his. Checking to see that Cullen was still asleep, she grabbed her staff to use as a walking stick, and went out to check on everyone who fought the previous night. One of Cullen’s seconds updated her on the injuries that had all been healed, that there were no deaths, for which she breathed out a “thank the Maker.” She made the rounds thanking each soldier for fighting and checking on the Templars for lyrium withdrawal. That is where Cullen found her.

“Inquisitor?” Cullen came up to her talking with a soldier.

“Good morning,” Athena smiled at him, leaning on her staff.

“Morning,” Cullen was still confused as to what she was doing and worried about how heavily she was leaning on her staff.

“Commander, the Inquisitor’s been all through camp thanking us for fighting in the battle last night. I told her that she didn’t have to thank us, but she said that it was important,” the soldier said excitedly.

“Has she?” Cullen did not taking his eyes off of Athena. Just then the breakfast call went out and all the soldiers moved away from them. “What are you doing?”

“Thanking them. I also wanted to see if the templars were suffering from withdrawal,” Athena answered simply.

“Why?” 

“Because they deserve it,” Duchess started walking toward the King and Queen’s tent.

“I thank them on a daily basis. Why did you feel the need to thank them? I told the Templars to come to me if they suffered from withdrawal symptoms.” He put his arm around her and murmured at her wince, “You should still be in bed.”

“Because last night wasn’t about saving the world. It was about fighting off things while Morrigan fought the demon that had Selene under her sway,” Athena said softly.

“They knew who they were fighting for, Athena. I told them that they could sit out if they chose. Every single soldier with us refused and talked of how the Queen saved them from the blight. Every soldier here is from Fereldan. Alistair and Selene are fair, just, and kind rulers. Even though they fought at the Inquisition’s encouragement, they can now say they fought for their king and queen,” Cullen explained as they stopped a few feet in front of the royals’ tent.

“I don’t want our soldiers to ever feel obligated that they have to fight to save a single person,” Athena said with tears in her eyes.

“And that’s why you had to thank them,” Cullen understood now. Athena nodded. He kissed her gently and repeated, “You should be resting.”

“So long as nothing chaotic goes on, it’s been my habit lately to fall asleep before or right after lunch."

Cullen looked around, “Shouldn’t there be a guard or someone outside of the tent?”

“You’re asking me?” Athena was incredulous.

“You’re nobility,” Cullen teased.

“I grew up in a circle. I couldn’t go to the bathroom without a guard, but that had nothing to do with my being nobility.” Athena reminded him then impishly asked, “How many did you watch go to the bathroom?”

“None!” Cullen blushed. 

Athena laughed and kissed him, “I love it when I can get you to blush.”

“Yes, because that’s so hard for you to do,” Curly griped.

Athena smiled brightly at him, “So... Do we knock? How does one go about knocking on a tent?”

Cullen laughed, “How is it possible that you don’t know proper tent etiquette?”

Athena’s smile turned in to a smirk, “Look at who I traveled with.”

“Good point,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena waited for Cullen to do or say something. She grew impatient, “Well?”

“Well what?” 

“My abilities don’t let me see through tents,” Athena teased, but she was leaning heavier on her staff, even with Cullen supporting her.

“Maybe this visit should wait until you rest,” Cullen reprimanded, pulling her tighter to him to support her more. 

“I just want to see how the queen is doing and then I will go lay down,” Athena said, her eyes showing her worry.

“How much did you hear last night?”

Athena thought for a moment and then said, “I may have heard… Triplets?”

“You heard that correctly. As of last night the queen was not in labor. But Ellendra has no idea as to why the contractions are so strong. Selene’s back pain is mostly from the extra weight,” Cullen explained.

Before he could continue on about the discussion from last night they heard Selene yell, “Alistair! Let me go!”

“You are to be resting!” Alistair grumbled.

“I have to use the garderobe!” Selene retaliated.

Athena looked up at Cullen and smirked, “I’m not the only one.”

“Hush, you,” Cullen grumbled and they continued to listen in on the royals’ argument.

“You are not walking down that hill!” Alistair yelled.

“I’m going to walk when I feel I have the need to!” Selene almost growled.

“No! Use the chamber pot!” Alistair was furious with his wife.

“If I use that thing I’m going to fall or not be able to get back up. Which is worse, Alistair?” Selene imperiously asked.

“Are you telling me that you can promise me that you won’t have a contraction as you’re walking down that hill and fall?” Alistair’s tone of voice said he didn’t believe her.

“There’s less chance of that than me falling because I tried to use a chamber pot,” Selene grumbled.

Athena looked at Cullen. He took one look at her and commanded, “No. You’re too weak and sore to go with her by yourself.”

“Then why don’t we invite them for breakfast?” Athena suggested.

“Great idea,” Cullen said as they walked up to the tent. Cullen called in, “Your majesties, would you like to have breakfast in our cabin?”

“Sweet Andraste, yes,” Selene came out of the tent as fast as her body would allow. Once out of the tent she pressed her hands into her back to ease the ache. 

Alistair swiftly followed, “Selene, wait for me!”

“You don’t have three children laying on your bladder!” Selene called back. It wasn’t hard for the king to catch up with her as she was still moving pretty slow.

“What about Marie?” Athena looked up at Cullen.

“Go look,” he nodded his head toward the royals’ tent. Athena peeked in and saw that the toddler was playing with one of her nurses, she sighed in relief. When Athena stood, he pulled her tight against him and asked, “All is well?”

Athena nodded in response and they walked back to their cabin. Of course, they stopped half way there because Selene and Alistair were arguing again. “Alistair, I tripped.”

“All the more reason I should be carrying you,” Alistair argued.

“You tripped too,” Selene griped.

Our lovers looked at each other ruefully and Curly said, “We’ll meet you down there.” And off they went to their cabin. Morrigan and Kieran were waiting for them.

Kieran ran up to Athena and hugged her. She fought against a wince and failed. Morrigan noticed, “Athena?”

“I’m currently out of shape for battles,” Athena smiled.

“All is well though?” Morrigan inquired as they went in the cabin.

“Yes, all is well,” Cullen answered for Athena because she slept through her exam. 

As they were sitting down at the table the queen walked in and went straight to the garderobe. A great sigh of relief was heard from there. Alistair followed, “Where is she?”

“The garderobe,” Athena hoped to ease the tension she felt emanating from the king.

“Leave her alone,” Morrigan snapped, defending the queen.

“I’ll leave her alone when she stops freezing me,” Alistair grumbled.

They heard chuckling from the water closet. When Selene came out she apologized, “That was not intentional, my love. I’m sorry.”

Morrigan started, “Kieran informed me last night that he would like to return to Skyhold.”

“Did he now?” Alistair asked suspiciously.

“You think I would lie about my son’s wishes?” Morrigan indignantly returned.

“If it suited your own desires, yes,” Alistair accused.

Cullen and Athena looked at each other. Cullen spoke first, “Before we knew that the queen was possessed, Kieran said the same to us. We offered to talk to you about it but…”

“We had to save the queen,” Morrigan finished for him.

“Does it matter?” Selene asked Alistair, “We can’t stay here but we also cannot go to Denerim. If Athena and Cullen are willing to have us, our only choice right now is Skyhold.”

“It matters if she’s trying to keep Kieran from us,” Alistair couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Do not speak of me as though I am not present!” Morrigan bristled.

“You’re always welcome,” Athena quietly spoke, watching Kieran who was very uncomfortable with his parents fighting, “Kieran, would you like to go for a swim?”

“Yes, please?” Kieran begged. Morrigan nodded her approval.

Athena put her arm around him and said, “The last time I swam in this lake I saw all different kinds of fish.”

When the door closed, Alistair asked, flabbergasted, “You’re allowing her to leave?”

“This is one of those moments where my wife prefers the company of children and animals to the company of adults and I, for one, don’t blame her,” Cullen reprimanded and left the three of them to work out their differences.

**

Athena sat on the dock with her feet dangling in the water laughing at Kieran wrestling Bull, trying to get the giant qunari’s head underwater. Cullen sat beside her and spoke quietly, “I half expected to find you in the lake too.”

Athena’s smile dimmed a little, “If I wasn’t so sore, I would be.”

“Before we leave we’ll have to get in a swim,” Cullen promised as he pulled her from leaning on a pole so she could lean on him. 

“You mean do the thing we actually came here to do? That would be lovely,” Athena said sarcastically and then laughed as Kieran hung off of Tiny’s horns.

Cullen moved her back to her former position which earned him a quizzical look from his wife. He undressed, “I’m going to go help Kieran.”

“Have fun,” Athena smiled up at him.

Curly bent down to kiss her, “Oh, I intend to.” 

Cullen dove in and swam underwater to where Bull was and took out his legs causing both Kieran and Tiny to fall into the water. Kieran yelled on the way down. Athena laughed so hard that she started crying. Bull shot out of the water roaring and grabbed for Curly who deftly swam away.

Alistair and Morrigan came out of our lovers’ cabin and saw Athena sitting on the pier and joined her. Athena was holding her belly from laughing so hard which alarmed Morrigan, “Inquisitor?”

Still giggling, Athena responded, “Hello Morrigan, Your Majesty.”

“Are you all right?” Morrigan sat beside her.

“I’m fine. Cullen is helping Kieran dunk Bull,” Athena explained her laughter as she wiped away tears from her eyes. “Where is the queen?”

“Sleeping,” Alistair sighed, “finally.”

“Did she not sleep last night?” Morrigan took off her shoes and dipped her feet in the water.

“She was in too much pain,” Alistair said quietly.

“Is someone with her?” Athena sat up, worried that the queen was alone.

“Marie’s nurses,” Alistair watched the three in the water.

“Alistair, go play,” Athena quietly told him.

“If I could, I would,” Alistair responded with sadness in his voice.

“Utter nonsense,” Morrigan said under her breath.

Athena gave Morrigan a quelling look, and asked the king, “Why can’t you?”

“I’m the king,” Alistair reminded them, half wondering why he needed to.

“And he’s your son who wants to spend time with you,” Morrigan practically growled.

“Morrigan’s right, Alistair. Plus, you have been under a great amount of stress lately. Everyone needs time to just be themselves,” Athena wistfully spoke.

“You’re a wise woman, Inquisitor,” Alistair stripped down to his underclothes and dove into the lake so he could swim out to where the trio were playing.

Cullen saw Alistair swimming out and pointed it out to Kieran and Bull. Bull nodded at Cullen in unspoken understanding and Curly started swimming back to his wife.

Morrigan watched Alistair swim out and asked Athena, “Why did you bring Kieran out here?”

“He was uncomfortable with you and Alistair arguing.” Athena sighed, remembering her childhood, “My aunt and uncle argued constantly. So, I spent most of my time out of doors before I was taken to the circle.”

“I am sorry,” Morrigan said.

“It’s not me that you have to apologize to.” Athena changed the subject, “Where did you find that talisman?”

“I found it while I was living with my mother in the Kocari Wilds. I knew not what it was for until recently,” Morrigan explained.

“Are there more of them?”

“Possibly? The one Selene is wearing is the only one I found, and I hesitate to ask her to take it off,” Morrigan answered.

“Why?”

“I worry for her. These contractions she’s having do not make sense.”

“Does she use lyrium?” Athena scanned the lake for her husband.

“My friend, you are the only circle mage I know that does not strengthen their powers without an outside aid,” Morrigan complimented her.

“Have you seen her use it recently?” 

“I have not… But then I have not seen her use her abilities unless ‘tis on accident.” Morrigan paused, “You’re thinking lyrium withdrawal!” Athena nodded in agreement. Morrigan stood abruptly, “If you are all right here, I am going to speak with Ellendra.”

“I’m fine. Go,” Athena leaned back on the post with her hand resting on her belly watching father and son play. She smiled when she felt her baby move and that was the moment that Cullen decided to jump out of the water at her. He startled Duchess so much that she screamed and then clamped her hand over her mouth. When her heart stopped racing and her breathing normalized from the fright, Athena promised, “I am so going to get you back for that.”

Cullen smirked as he held on to her hips and asked, “Come swim with me?”

“I’m too sore,” Athena wished she could. She really was trying to be good, and here was her over protective husband trying to get her to misbehave.

“We can stick to the shallows and we’ll stop on your say so. I know you want to,” Cullen implored.

Athena looked out to where Alistair and Kieran were playing and said, barely above a whisper, “I can’t wait until you can play with our children like that.”

“Neither can I,” Curly agreed. He pulled himself up on the pier dripping all over Athena and kissed her, “You have two choices… you can come with me willingly, or I can pull you in.”

“You’ve already made me soaking wet,” she griped.

“So you’ll come willingly?” Cullen asked hopefully.

Athena sighed, and looked at her husband lovingly, “How can I say no?”

Cullen smiled as he gently pulled her in to the water and true to his word they stuck to the shallows and stopped when Athena said that she had enough. Cullen lifted her out of the water first and back to where she was sitting. The he pulled himself out of the water and sat beside his wife. As he drew Athena close to him, she asked, “How many children do you want?”

“I don’t know. I never really thought about it… How many are you willing to have?” Cullen paused, “What brought this on?”

“I think four is a good number. Selene asked how many children we wanted and I realized that we had never talked about it,” Duchess explained.

“Whatever you decide, I am fine with,” Cullen smiled into her hair and kissed the top of her head.

“You want me to decide?” Athena was unable to hide her shock.

“You had said that four was a good number. I agree with you. If you want less than that, fine. If you want more, I’m all right with that too,” Cullen answered softly.

Athena kissed him passionately in thanks and whispered, “Thank you.”

He smiled down at her and they held each other until Duchess started shivering. Cullen stood and reached out to help Athena up, “Let’s get you some dry clothes.”

“We can’t, the queen’s asleep,” Athena accepted his assistance as sitting in one place was starting to hurt.

“Athena, it’s nearly lunchtime. We’ve been out here since breakfast,” Cullen said, “I won’t allow you to get sick because of wet clothing and you being too kind,” Cullen put his arm around her and they walked to their cabin. 

When Cullen opened the door they heard Selene moaning and one of the maids said, “Thank the Maker! She won’t stop moaning even though she’s asleep.”

Cullen refused to release Athena even though he felt her pulling away, “She can wait a minute while you get dry clothing on.”

Athena listened and changed out of her wet clothes and into dry. She then asked the maid, “Can you go to the cabin next door and get Ellendra?” 

The maid curtsied and left. Cullen watched Duchess feel the queen’s belly, “What are you thinking?”

“That she’s going through lyrium withdrawal,” Athena answered softly as she watched the queen fitfully roll from her back, to her side, and almost onto her belly… Which Athena stopped with a strategically placed pillow underneath Selene’s large belly. She then put one between Queenie’s knees. 

Selene stopped moaning and was able to lay comfortably until a contraction hit that was so strong Queenie curled into as much of a ball as she could and cried out in her sleep. When the contraction released its grip on her slightly, Queenie opened her eyes to see Athena and Cullen, she hoarsely whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. Rest, Selene,” Athena reassured her. Selene nodded her head. She closed her eyes again and groaned as another wave of pain washed over her belly and back. 

Cullen stood behind Athena and placed his hands on her expanded belly, “Why did the pillows end her restlessness?”

“Extra weight needs extra support,” Athena said softly, “she should have another pillow at her head.”

“Your pillow obsession has a purpose?” Cullen teased.

“It does now. I just started the night before we left Skyhold,” Athena chuckled.

“Is that why you’re so sore today?” Cullen splayed his hands on her belly and pulled Athena down on to his lap as he sat.

Athena shrugged, “It may be one of the reasons.”

“Maker’s breath, Athena! Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Because I figured you would notice that there was more pillows than I usually use,” Athena munched on a chocolate chip cookie and smiled at him. He growled at her.

At that moment Ellendra, Morrigan, and the cook came in. The cook was delivering lunch. Ellendra went over to Selene and felt her belly which had tightened with another contraction causing Queenie to gasp. Morrigan sat beside Athena and Cullen and waited for Ellendra to speak. “Where’s the king?”

“Right here,” Alistair answered as he walked in with Kieran.

“If it is your desire to reach Skyhold before the queen gives birth, you must leave no later than the morrow. The queen should not be left alone except in the garderobe with the contractions worsening. I also think the Inquisitor is right in that the queen is suffering from lyrium withdrawal,” Ellendra informed them.

“We’ll leave as soon as we are packed up,” Alistair spoke.

“Alistair, you still need to eat. Especially the queen,” Athena softly told him.

“Why?” Alistair asked.

“Because the withdrawal pain only worsens with hunger and thirst,” Cullen quietly informed him, the voice of experience.

Athena stood and walked over to the queen and took away the withdrawal pain like she had done for Cullen so many times before. Selene breathed a sigh of relief and opened her eyes, “What did you do?”

“I took away the pain of the withdrawal. It will only last the day,” Athena said quietly as she returned to Cullen. Who promptly handed her a plate of food.

Selene slowly sat up with assistance from her husband, she slid off the bed and walked over to the table to sit down and eat. Morrigan and Ellendra were staring at Athena. Morrigan spoke first, “How are you able to do that?”

“What do you mean?” Athena took a sip of her drink.

“Taking away the pain of withdrawal,” Ellendra was still stunned.

“I started doing it while I was still at the circle. There was an old book there about lyrium and its effects. I read it, and it had this spell in it,” Athena explained.

“You are a wonder, Inquisitor,” Morrigan said softly.

Selene gasped slightly as they finished their meal. Athena was quick to inform her, “There is nothing I can do about the contractions.”

“They are less painful now. Even the pain in my back has dulled somewhat,” Selene remarked.

“That didn’t have anything to do with magic,” Athena smiled.

“Just your pillow obsession,” Cullen teased gently. Athena stuck her tongue out at him. He laughed and kissed her.

Alistair kissed his wife, “I’m going to have our people break everything down.” Selene nodded and he left.

Cullen looked at Athena, “When did you want to leave?”

Athena sighed. For a relaxing vacation it wasn’t very relaxing, “In a few days?”

Cullen kissed her and left. Athena looked at Morrigan and Ellendra, “I want you to go with the queen.”

“What about you?” Morrigan didn’t like the idea of Duchess being without a healer.

“They will probably catch up to us and surpass us,” Selene guessed.

Morrigan chuckled, “True.”

“I’ll pack my things,” Ellendra said and left.

Morrigan left to inform Kieran that they were leaving and to pack, leaving Athena and the queen alone. Selene gasped slightly and pressed down on the bench she was sitting on hoping Athena hadn’t noticed. Once she thought the contraction had passed she stood and hugged Athena, “Thank you for all you’ve done.”

“You’re welcome,” Athena yawned.

“Get some rest, my friend,” Selene left as quickly as she could. Athena growled and followed her which was a good thing for the queen as the contraction had come back in full force and it brought her to her knees not even five steps away from the door. Athena found her groaning and gasping for air, shakily supporting herself on one hand and the other arm wrapped underneath her belly.

Athena sighed and helped her to at least be able to sit on the ground, “I told you that what I did did not stop or ease the contractions at all. You should have waited for me to get someone to walk with you.”

Cullen was on his way back, and saw Selene sitting on the ground and Athena standing over her. He called back to Alistair and they both started running. Athena looked up and saw who was running toward them and shook her head and went back inside. Cullen looked back at Alistair and he nodded that he and Selene would be all right. Cullen went in the cabin to hear Athena muttering, “Stubborn, fool woman.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “The stubbornness reminds me of someone else I love.”

“I may be stubborn but I at least try to listen when my healers tell me something,” Athena was very irritated and shoving her clothing into her trunk and satchel, “I told her that what I did had no effect on her contractions. She tells me to get some rest and then leaves before I can respond!”

“Selene has never been one to ask for help. Even when she was an apprentice, she never asked for help."

“There comes a time in everyone’s life where it’s beneficial to ask for help. I would think carrying triplets and suffering from lyrium withdrawal at the same time would be an indication of needing help,” Athena was getting angrier the more she thought of it.

Morrigan had entered and she looked at Cullen hearing Athena’s tirade, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her this angry.”

Cullen walked over to his wife to kiss her. When the kiss ended he smiled, “I agree with you. Promise me you’ll remember this the next time you need help?”

“I’m getting better,” Athena groused and saw Cullen’s look. Sighing, she grumbled, “I promise.”

“I’m going to hold you to it,” He said earnestly and then teased, “the destruction of your clothing should be left to me.”

“Oh?”

Cullen chuckled, “Your wardrobe is not eight months pregnant, going through lyrium withdrawal, and refusing to listen to their healers.”

Athena’s look turned to one of supreme frustration, “Fool woman. At least we could blame the earlier nonsense on the demon that was trying to possess her." She turned to face Morrigan, "You’re here to say goodbye."

“I am. Be safe, my friend,” Morrigan hugged Athena.

“Josephine’s going to panic having everyone back at once. And the queen is going to have to be near a garderobe that doesn’t involve stairs or walking very far…” Athena sighed.

“What are you thinking?” Cullen already didn’t like where this was going.

“That we have to give up our quarters,” she almost whined.

“And where are we going to sleep?” He knew it, now he was absolutely certain of it. He also dreaded Duchess’ answer.

“Where we used to sleep,” Athena said.

“My former quarters,” Cullen sighed and started pacing.

“You’re worried?” Athena didn’t understand his worry, considering she had spent more time in his quarters than hers during the war.

“Considering there’s a ladder to get to the bedroom, yes,” Cullen answered.

“I am not so big that I cannot climb a ladder yet,” Athena said indignantly.

“And what of you needing to use the water closet in the middle of the night? During the war, you had two hands,” Cullen tried to gently remind her.

“I have every intention of this being only temporary,” Athena paused to think and could see of no other option, “What choice do we have?”

Cullen sighed heavily, “None.”

Athena turned to Morrigan again, “If you get there before us…”

Morrigan cackled, “You must be joking.”

Athena chuckled, “Still, inform Josie to have our things moved to Cullen’s old quarters and put the royals in ours until the babies are born.”

“I will do as you ask, my friend,” Morrigan gave her another hug and then left.

“I have to go back to helping the soldiers tearing down nonessentials,” Cullen took hold of her hand.

“I should go say goodbye to Kieran and the royals,” Athena sighed wearily.

“Then will you rest?” Cullen noticed the longing look the bed received.

“I’ll try,” Athena said as they walked out of their cabin and headed in separate directions.

Kieran saw Duchess and ran to her, “We’re actually going back to Skyhold! Thank you!”

“I didn’t do anything Kieran,” Athena hugged him in return, confused as to why the boy was thanking her.

“You convinced my father to stop being a king for a while this morning. Thank you!” Kieran went to get on his horse whistling and chanting that he was going home. 

“I already said goodbye to you,” Morrigan said imperially.

“I wanted to say goodbye to Kieran and Josephine will have my head if I don’t say goodbye to the royals."

Morrigan nodded once as she got on her horse, “I will see you in a few days.”

“That bad?” Athena asked.

“I would not be surprised if she’s fully in labor before we reach Skyhold,” Morrigan turned her horse to be with Kieran.

Athena walked up to the royal carriage to hear Selene moaning in pain and arching her back. Alistair walked up behind Athena and she told him, “She needs pillows.”

“Why doesn’t she tell me that?!” Alistair was irritated with Selene as he walked away to get pillows from one of the wagons.

Athena shrugged, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

“I know… I’m sorry… I just…” Alistair trailed off as he ran a hand through his hair.

“Wish she would ask for help instead of suffering?” Athena smiled sadly at him.

“Exactly,” Alistair looked at her, at a loss, “how many should I bring?”

“As many as will fit comfortably in the carriage,” Athena chuckled softly.

“Is ten the magic number?” Alistair inquired.

“For me it is… For now,” Athena smiled as she caught a glimpse of her husband.

“What did the Commander do when he saw all of those pillows?” Alistair carried as many pillows as he could. 

Athena grabbed a few too, and walked back with him she smirked, “He didn’t complain too much. I’ve always slept with a lot of pillows.”

Alistair chuckled, “I can imagine. Sadly, using pillows for something other than sleep is out of the cards for me at the moment.”

Athena shrugged, “It might relax her a bit…”

“Really?” Alistair asked hopefully.

Athena chuckled, “I’ve heard of stranger things.”

After they dumped the pillows in to the carriage Alistair turned to her, “Thank you, Inquisitor, for everything.”

“You’re welcome. I wish you swift travels,” Athena looked in at the queen, who was sweating profusely. Shakily, Selene started to stand to leave the carriage. 

Ellendra had come up to say goodbye to Athena and saw what was happening. In a tone that showed disobedience would not be tolerated, Ellendra ordered, “Your Majesty, I must insist that you sit down. If it is possible you should be lying down. Unless you want to give birth to your children in the carriage?”

Selene promptly sat down and stared mulishly at the other side of the carriage. Athena inquired, “Is that possible?”

“The babies are dropping, she has a week, two at most,” Ellendra answered, “stay safe, Inquisitor.” Athena nodded in response.

Alistair groaned, “Laying down means more pillows!”  
“Safe travels,” Athena’s laughter rang through out what was left of camp catching Cullen by surprise as he was breaking down a cot… And he broke it. 

I laughed at him, “How many cots does that make now?”

“Shut up, dwarf,” Curly grumbled.

**

Curly returned to the cabin to find a sleeping wife with dinner for two on the table. Cullen gently sat on the bed taking notice to Athena’s pillow collection and chuckled softly. He placed a gentle hand on her belly and watched her sleep for several minutes. Thinking that she was the most beautiful, amazing, and caring person in Thedas…the world. What astounded him even more was that she loved him, married him, and was carrying his child. He had decided long ago that he deserved none of those things. (It’s a good thing Duchess can’t hear his thoughts at times.)

Athena woke and stretched before she opened her violet eyes. When she did finally open her eyes, she saw tears glistening in Cullen’s brown ones. Worried, she asked, “Cullen?”

“You are so beautiful,” Cullen hoarsely got out.

“My beauty has you in tears, does it?” Athena was still worried.

He smiled at her and kissed her. When the kiss ended, he whispered, “More times than I should admit.”

Athena pulled him down on her and they made love before they ate dinner. After dinner our lovers went to the lake for a swim. Athena was still pretty sore from the battle last night so the swim was very peaceful with Cullen keeping her always within an arm’s reach. There was one moment where I looked over and Cullen had lifted Athena up in the air with water pouring off of her and over Cullen. He was looking up at her with so much love and reverence that I got a lump in my throat. Athena’s hair fell forward as she looked down at him. Ever so slowly he brought her down, wet body sliding against wet body. 

When they were about equal height he kissed her and she wrapped her arm around his neck, not releasing him from the kiss as she was gently released back into the water. Wrapping both arms around her waist he pressed her to him… If I hadn’t been drinking that night I would have thought that they were making love in the lake. They swam to shore and disappeared in to their cabin.

We stayed an extra few days so Duchess could fully rest from the battle and she and Curly could get some alone time. When we did leave it didn’t take long until we ran into the royal party. They had stopped so the queen could rest and discreetly go to the bathroom. Alistair was standing guard over her so he could assist her.

As Athena and Cullen left the carriage to stretch their legs, Athena thought it would be a good idea for someone to ride ahead and let Ruffles know of the temporary changes to their quarters. Cullen agreed and they went to speak with their swiftest rider. 

As the rider went off Morrigan found them, “I thought I was to arrive at Skyhold before you…”

“We can go back… We had a very peaceful time,” Cullen teased.

“Ha,” Morrigan laughed without humor.

“I told you because I trust you,” Athena informed her.

“Thank you, Inquisitor,” Morrigan smiled and bowed her head a little.

“Where’s Kieran?” Cullen asked.

“Sleeping,” Morrigan said softly.

“Why?” Athena was concerned for the little boy. Right after, a scream rent the air.

“That’s why,” Morrigan remarked after uncovering her ears.

“That wasn’t Selene?” Athena was now very worried.

“No, thankfully. Even though she still refuses to listen to anyone. To get her to do bed rest, we’re going to have to tie her to the bed,” Morrigan made no attempt at hiding her irritation with her friend. Another scream echoed through the camp, “one of the maids twisted her ankle. It may be broken for all the noise she’s making. She's also claiming that she's with child.”

Cullen and Athena looked at each other. I think Curly was starting to wonder what was in the water (I know I was.) “No one said anything.”

“We knew not, until she started screaming last night,” Morrigan informed him.

“Is that why you’re stopped?” Athena questioned as they walked toward our lovers’ carriage.

“Nay, Ellendra said that we were to keep moving as the maid is not that far along. The maid refused her ankle being healed,” Morrigan explained as another wail could be heard across the camp.

“It doesn’t sound that way…” Athena trailed off.

“And the queen?” Cullen thought the maid just wanted attention.

“She is... difficult,” Morrigan answered, “At times she is all right. At others, it seems as though nothing can settle her.”

“You want to see her, don’t you?” Cullen guessed as he looked down at Duchess. Another scream rent the quiet of the forest.

“The spell I used yesterday would have wore off by now,” Athena said softly. They walked to the royals’ carriage to see Selene laying on a mountain of pillows and writhing in agony. Athena whispered, “Your Majesty, it’s Athena. I’m going to take away the withdrawal pain now. You’re about half way to Skyhold.”

Athena cast her spell and the queen whispered a hoarse, “thank you,” and fell asleep.

Cullen was talking quietly to a pacing Alistair, “You shouldn’t be giving up your quarters for us.”

“The Inquisitor is right. The queen needs to be somewhere that is safe and with a garderobe nearby. It’s only until the queen gives birth and can be moved safely,” Cullen responded as he put an arm around Athena. “How is the queen?” 

“Sleeping. Hopefully peacefully now that the withdrawal pain is gone."

Alistair sighed in relief, “Thank you.”

“We should get moving then,” Cullen remarked. Alistair nodded and went back to his wife.

Morrigan followed them back to their carriage and requested, “Would you be willing to take Kieran back with you? He calls Skyhold home.”

“You don’t want him to sleep?” Athena asked as Cullen helped her into the carriage.

“I suspect that he would sleep easier with you,” Morrigan replied as another yell could be heard easily from across the camp.

“We would be happy to take him ‘home’,” Cullen responded.

“You have my thanks,” Morrigan bowed her head and went to get Kieran. 

Cullen sat beside Athena as she arranged her pillows to where she felt she would be most comfortable. He put his arm around her where his hand could caress her growing belly, “Taking a nap?”

“That’s the plan,” Athena snuggled in to him. 

Morrigan brought a very sleepy Kieran over. She briefly kissed him, “Be on your best behavior for the Commander and Inquisitor.”

“I will, Mother,” Kieran’s voice was soft as he was barely awake. Morrigan turned away before anyone could see the tears in her eyes. And our lovers, with Kieran in tow, were Skyhold bound. When we got back, we were informed that Hawke and Anders had left. Curly, Sparkler, and I all sighed in relief.


	48. Chapter 48

Cullen woke to clothing flying through the air, he sighed and dodged the missiles of clothing to get to his trunk. He watched Athena search for several minutes after he was dressed. He finally dared to ask, “What are you doing?”

“Trying to find something to wear,” Athena pulled out more clothes.

“What about the twenty garments already laying on the floor?”

“They don’t fit anymore,” Athena blushed.

“Athena,” he said to get her attention as more clothing came flying out, “Wear one of my shirts.”

“I would still need something on my legs and all of my pants are too small now,” Athena went back to her desperate search.

Cullen suggested, “There are about five dresses on the floor."

She held up a pale blue dress and showed him the large rent in it, “They all have tears of various sizes.”

“Why haven’t you said anything?” Cullen went over to his trunk and pulled out a shirt for her and dug to the bottom of his trunk for a pair of pants.

“I had hoped the clothing Josie had ordered would be here by now,” she put a hand down on the floor for balance. 

As he brought the clothing to her Cullen was slightly concerned at Duchess’ unsteadiness, “Are you all right?”

“I’m feeling a little off balance,” Athena blushed. “Will you help me up?”

Cullen threw the clothing on the bed and wrapped an arm around Athena’s waist to gently lift her to her feet, “Maybe you should go back to bed.”

“Feeling a little off balance is normal. I’m hungry, thirsty, and I will need to use the garderobe fairly soon. Going back to bed is not happening,” Athena wobbled a little on her feet and Cullen braced her by putting a hand at her back. Duchess took a quick look at the pants Curly picked for her and sighed despondently, “I’m going to be tripping over your pants.”

“I haven’t been able to wear them in years, if they are too long we’ll roll the pants legs up,” Cullen said as Athena sat down on the bed to get dressed. Cullen’s concern was quickly turning to worry, “You really are feeling off balance, you never sit down to get dressed.”

“I’m hoping it’s just because I’m really hungry,” she laid back on the bed to pull the pants up. Everything fastened except the top button to which Athena murmured, “Of course it wouldn’t.”

Cullen chuckled because only he could see how much of her feet were covered and bent down to roll the pant legs up to her ankles. Athena struggled to sit back up but finally made it. She put on Cullen’s shirt and rolled up the sleeves. Athena felt a long movement from the baby and whispered excitedly, “Cullen, stop. Give me your hand.”

He obliged and Athena placed his hand where she felt the baby moving. Cullen smiled as it was the first time he felt the baby move. Once the movement stopped he kissed her for a very long time and whispered hoarsely, “Thank you.” And then he kissed the spot through his shirt where he felt the baby move, shifting his hand down ever so slightly, still resting on her growing belly. And then it growled, loudly. Laughing, he said, “Let’s get you some breakfast.”

Athena stood using the foot board for support. Cullen waited until she stopped swaying to stand. As had been the habit since returning from the lake weeks ago, he went down the ladder first in case Athena would slip or fall so he could catch her. Athena slowly went down the ladder and her enlarged belly brushed against every rung. Once they were sitting at the table she commented, “I’m not going to be able to do that for much longer.”

“Then I’m getting our quarters back,” Cullen was irritated that it was taking so long.

“Ellendra said it should be any day now. If Selene would let them induce her she would have had the babies a week ago,” Athena informed him

“Maybe I should convince her,” Curly rumbled.

Athena gave a short bark of laughter which caused the baby to jump and she caressed the spot, “We’ve all been asking her daily. With the demon mimicking labor for most of her pregnancy, she’s understandably afraid.”

“Ellendra isn’t a demon that is out to hurt her or possess her,” Cullen griped. Athena had to go to Queenie daily and sometimes twice a day to stop the withdrawal pain.

“She knows that, but I think she witnessed more in the cave than what she told us. Every time she is asked about being induced she gets a look of terror on face,” Athena went back for seconds.

They fell silent for a couple minutes as Athena ate. When she finished, Cullen took hold of and caressed her hand, “What are your plans for the day?”

“I’m going to check on Selene…” Cullen growled low interrupting her. Athena chastised, “Cullen.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t like that you have to keep going to her to pull the lyrium withdrawal pain from her. You have had to do it daily for the past few weeks and lately you’ve had to do it twice a day. I don’t want you hurting yourself,” Cullen finally gave voice to his worry and frustration. It had been steadily building, to the point where he was hitting very hard in the sparring ring and when he trained with the soldiers.

“It’s no different than what I have done for you. When I was at the circle there was one templar who would come to me every hour, unless he was sleeping, to take away the pain. It didn’t hurt me then, it’s not going to now,” Athena smiled gently at him, hoping to reassure him.

“He probably came that often because he wanted to see you,” Cullen smiled back at her.

“That doesn’t matter, the spell I performed was the same,” Athena released her husband’s hand to take a drink.

Cullen whispered, almost involuntarily, “You weren’t with child then and you didn’t have to ascend several stair ways.”

Athena slowly put her drink down. She stood and walked over to him. Once Duchess reached Curly, she tried to fit between the table and her husband to sit on his lap. She couldn’t. Chuckling softly, Cullen pushed his chair away from the table to make room for his wife. 

Once she was sitting on his lap she said softly, “Since Morrigan taught me to block my ability to mentally link with who I am healing, I haven’t been hurt by using my magic at all. I know you’re worried, but the lyrium withdrawal spell I have more than a passing knowledge of. The only way that spell could hurt me is if I used lyrium. Maybe that’s why I’m the only one that can perform it.” As she was talking she felt the baby move again and placed his hand there.

“Maybe,” Cullen sighed as he caressed her belly, “what other meetings have been planned?”

“I’m meeting with Josie and Leliana for lunch, then a nap, and Morrigan and I are going to get together and work with Ana on her magic,” Athena listed off her activities.

“Are you coming back here for your nap?” Cullen wondered if he should hold his meetings elsewhere so he wouldn’t disturb her sleep.

“No, Morrigan lets me use her quarters,” she started playing with his hair.

Cullen restrained himself from crushing her to him but held her close, “I won’t be free until dinner tonight. I do not want that to stop you from sending someone to get me should you have need me.”

“It won’t,” Athena promised.

He kissed her then, long and passionately. When the kiss ended he said hoarsely, “Maker, I wish I could spend the day with you.”

“The soldiers need you, too,” she kissed him lightly and tried to get up….

Cullen wasn’t ready to release her just yet as desire lit his brown eyes, “Should we go back upstairs?”

Athena looked at him with widened eyes, “No! It takes too much effort to get dressed now. Plus, if you rip this I will have nothing to wear.”

“That means you would have to stay in bed all day…” Cullen teased as he rubbed her back.

“I am not staying in bed all by myself,” Athena returned his teasing with a quip of her own.

“Maybe we should arrange that for tomorrow,” Cullen really liked that idea.

Athena sighed, she loved the idea, but she did not want to have to climb down a ladder repeatedly, cross the walkway, and use the atrium’s garderobe, “Wait until we get back into our quarters, please?”

“Why?” Cullen sounded disappointed.

Athena crossed her legs, “Because I really have to use the garderobe, and just thinking about all the trips I would have to make has me exhausted.”

Cullen laughed as he stood her up and then followed. He took hold of her hand and indicated that they could leave. If Duchess had to wait a couple more minutes, she would’ve had to run. They walked in to the atrium and Athena ran the rest of the way to the water closet causing Curly to chuckle. When she came out he said, “Maybe we should make this our temporary quarters.”

“And be surrounded by Solas’ paintings of me?” Athena blanched, “No, thank you.”

Cullen laughed, “You can have them painted over.”

“Once Leliana’s people are done with them I probably will,” Athena liked that idea.

They walked hand in hand to the door of their former quarters and kissed goodbye. I, of course, applauded getting both of them to blush. Athena disappeared through the door as Curly walked by me, I couldn’t resist teasing, “Your clothes look better on Duchess.”

Cullen chuckled as he walked past, “I agree.”

Almost immediately Athena heard Selene moaning which she found odd. Athena raced up the stairs, saw Selene gripping the railing, and crouching. Water was gushing out of her. Athena was about to help her when Ellendra came racing down the stairs, “Inquisitor, she is in too precarious a position for you to do anything. I will assist the queen. Can you get pillows, towels, blankets, and find the king, please?” She helped Queenie back from the railing to lay on the floor. Selene immediately arched her back and rolled side to side.

Athena ran up to her room and grabbed as many pillows and towels as her growing belly would allow her to carry. Bringing them back to Ellendra she offered, “I’ll have Josephine send more. Is there anything you need me to do?”

“When your healer is in the garderobe, don’t run from her?” Ellendra asked, exasperated.

“I had to use the garderobe,” Selene gasped out, arching her back and moaning loudly.

“We noticed,” Athena quipped quietly, eliciting a soft chuckle from Ellendra. Athena wondered, “Do you need me to come back?”

“No, we’ll be fine. By the end of the week, you will have your quarters back,” Ellendra answered.

“Cullen will be very happy to hear that,” Athena murmured to herself as she left. Duchess walked in to Ruffles’ office without knocking, “The queen’s finally going to give birth. Ellendra needs towels, pillows, blankets, and hot water.”

“Thank the Maker. I’ll send them up right away,” Josephine breathed a sigh of relief.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where the king is would you?” Athena inquired.

“After breakfast Leliana and he ascended to the rookery,” Josephine answered and then some what teased, “We will discuss your choice in clothing later.”

“I’ll stop wearing Cullen’s clothing as soon as my new wardrobe arrives,” Athena smirked.

“It hasn’t arrived yet?!” Josephine exclaimed and then growled, “I will find out what happened to your clothing without delay, Inquisitor.”

Athena left and ran through the library to get to the rookery. Dorian caught her, “Slow down.”

“Can’t, the queen’s in labor,” Athena said breathlessly.

“That’s fantastic news, but the king left the rookery about half an hour ago,” Dorian informed her.

Athena groaned, “Any idea on where he went?”

“I believe the queen had frustrated him to the point of violence,” Dorian let her go now that her breathing had returned to normal.

Athena thanked Sparkler as she walked swiftly away from him, down the stairs, and out of the main keep. She saw Alistair sparring with Cullen as she came down the stairs. When she reached the sparring ring she couldn’t help but tease, “Busy until dinner he tells me, and here he is sparring.”

“You’re the one that didn’t want to stay in bed,” Cullen put the king in a headlock.

“It’s a good thing I didn’t want to…” Athena smirked, “considering the queen’s water broke.”

Alistair tripped Cullen and he fell face first into the dirt. The king ran in to the keep to be with his wife. I laughed, “The king wins!”

“Shut up, dwarf,” Curly mumbled as he lifted his head up.

“Sorry, Curly, I couldn’t quite make that out. I think you got more than a taste of dirt there,” I laughed again.

Cullen pushed himself up off of the ground and stood. He looked at Athena who was giggling, “That is the last time you cost me a sparring match.”

“Is it, now?” Athena asked with a wide smile and a challenge accepted note to her voice. He went to put an arm around her and she dodged him, “Don’t touch me, you need a bath.”

“You never cared before!” Cullen exclaimed.

Athena put her hand on top of her growing belly and reminded her husband, “I also had clothing I could change in to before.”

“Fair point,” Cullen grumbled and dunked his face in a bucket of water to wash the dirt off, “Can I at least get a kiss?”

She smiled and blushed. They kissed, Curly careful to keep his dirty mitts from her. When the kiss ended Athena asked, “Why were you sparring with Alistair?”

“He was getting a little rough with the new recruits. Apparently Selene couldn’t be still for longer than five minutes last night and was in an incredible amount of pain. They also got in to a fight,” Cullen told her.

“Oh?” She asked as they walked to their temporary quarters so he could change.

“He doesn’t want her to suffer anymore just to have children. She said she wanted to have several more!” Cullen took off his shirt.

Athena’s eyes got huge and she sat down heavily on the bed, “Sweet Andraste! She had told me that she wanted a lot… But I thought hearing that she was having triplets would change her mind a bit.”

“According to Alistair, no,” Cullen noticed that Athena was leaning back on the bed and watching him undress. He bent over her and kissed her. While Cullen had his wife distracted he started pulling up on her shirt to gain access to her belly. As he caressed her belly he heard her lightly moan with desire. Gently pulling his wife’s shirt off he pushed her down on the bed. 

Cullen kissed her from her neck down through the crevice of her breasts and all over her enlarged belly. Athena shifted to get more access of the bed as he pulled the pants off. After Cullen climbed on top of her he bent down to whisper in her ear, “I thought you didn’t want to spend the day in bed?”

Athena wrapped her arm around his neck and shifted against him seeking purchase, and whispered, “I could never resist you.” (This was one of the few times they made it to the bed.)

They slowly got dressed after making love with light intimate touches. And then they heard the door slam open as a new recruit called, “Commander!”

“We’ll be down in a minute!” Cullen called down as Athena finished getting dressed.

“You can go. I’ll be careful, I promise,” Athena reached up to kiss him.

“Are you certain?” Cullen asked, in the weeks they had been doing this Athena hadn’t slipped once, but being the worrier he is, he worried.

“Go,” Athena implored him. He kissed her briefly but passionately and left. 

Athena felt the baby move and smiled. She cleaned up the mess she made earlier. The constant bending had left her a little breathless and sat on the bed for a bit, so she didn’t push herself too hard. Her belly started to growl, and Athena made her way to the ladder and as she promised Cullen, she was very careful going down the ladder. 

When she was half way down someone blared a horn startling her and caused her to lose her balance. Athena was able to keep her grip on the ladder but she twisted her arm and crashed into the ladder with her back. Once her feet were firmly planted on the floor she released the ladder and went to find a healer. Unfortunately, the two she trusted were with the queen so Athena went to lunch with Ruffles and Nightingale very sore.

Leliana noticed Duchess’ wince as she sat, “Why are you wincing?”

“I was startled coming down the ladder and slipped,” Athena started eating.

“Startled by what?” Ruffles asked.

“I assume a noble announcing their arrival to Skyhold.”

Josephine growled, “Marquis Rakona. Do not be surprised to hear that blasted horn every hour on the hour.”

Athena sighed, “Every day I miss my quarters more and more.”

“Why haven’t you been to a healer?” Nightingale was still concerned over what she assumed was Duchess’ fall.

“Because they’re all busy with the queen. I’m fine, Leliana. I’m just sore,” Athena tried to reassure her.

“Does the Commander know you’ve been hurt?” Ruffles inquired.

“No, he left before I did. Has anyone been up to check on the queen?” Athena was quickly tiring of the interrogation.

“No, no one has.” Leliana sounded worried, “We also haven’t heard anything.”

“I’ll see what’s going on,” Athena stood and left before they could question or stop her. She slowly walked up the stairs, her back was bothering her more than when she first hurt it. Selene had not moved from where Ellendra had laid her down in the middle of the stairs. Caerwin was telling her to push. 

Ellendra walked over to Athena, “Inquisitor?”

“How is she?” Athena rubbed her shoulder.

“The first one should be born within the next hour. Are you all right?” Ellendra inquired.

Athena shook her head, “I don’t want to take you away from the queen.”

“What happened?” Ellendra motioned to walk down the stairs where it was quieter.

“I was startled while I was climbing down the ladder and lost my balance,” Athena answered.

“Did you fall?” 

“No, but I twisted my arm trying to hang on and I hit my back against the ladder,” Athena sat on the stairs.

“Should I take a look?” 

“Please?” Athena’s voice held a note of worry to it. She didn’t think anything was wrong except for possible bruising, but she also didn’t think anything was wrong when she lost the first pegnancy.

“Everything?” Ellendra started with Athena’s back. Athena nodded in response. 

Ellendra checked Athena’s back and shoulder. And then she checked on the baby. “Your back and shoulder are merely bruised, and the baby is fine. Would you like me to heal you?”

Athena sighed in relief, “Yes.”

Ellendra smiled and healed her, “At this stage in the pregnancy it would take a brutal hit to lose the baby or babies. I would prefer that you not go in search of this type of hit.”

Athena chuckled, “So would I. Thank you, Ellendra.”

Ellendra went back up the stairs and not long after Athena heard the wail of a child being brought in to the world, and absent-mindedly laid a hand on her enlarged belly. She promptly felt the babe move and she smiled. Opening the door to the main hall she was nearly run over by her husband. Cullen swore, “Maker’s breath! I didn’t see you! Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, Cullen,” Athena looked up at him ruefully.

“Leliana said in our meeting that you had been injured,” Cullen was very worried.

Athena growled, upset with Nightingale for making more of her mishap than it was, “If you consider bruises injuries, yes, I was.”

“She said that you fell off the ladder getting down,” Cullen was still panicked and berating himself for leaving her alone.

“I did not fall. I was startled and lost my balance twisting my arm and bruising my back,” Athena was very irritated with the assumptions and worry. She was also tired, “I’m fine, the baby is fine. Ellendra healed my bruises.”

They started walking to the garden. Cullen said softly, “I’m sorry, Athena. When she said you fell and then said that you were going to see the queen…”

“I was going to check on the queen, nothing more. Ellendra had a moment and we talked.” Athena paused, “Cullen, I’m going to get bruises. I’m going to walk into things without realizing it. I always have. I may even fall down a couple steps a time or two. But you cannot come running every time I or our child gets a bruise.”

“I wouldn’t have known had Leliana not said anything and she made it seem a lot worse than it was… Were you going to tell me?” Cullen wondered out loud.

“Yes, tonight… Maybe… If I remembered… and was awake to see you,” Athena stopped and started a lot.

Cullen chuckled, “You usually don’t forget about things.”

“She used to forget about food quite often,” Sparkler remarked as he passed them. Athena growled at her cousin. Dorian smirked and continued to pick, “It’s true!”

Athena glowered at Sparkler. It was a good thing Curly was there to rescue him from Duchess because he was very close to being held in place with her powers, “Dorian go find someone else to pester.” Cullen took hold of her hand and led her to a secluded spot in the gardens. He asked quietly, seeing that his wife was trying to hide behind her heavy hair, “What’s wrong?”

Athena was crying, “I am so tired of my friends and loved ones thinking that I’m out to hurt myself or that I’m not being honest with them. It may take me a little but I do realize that there are times when I need help. I also understand that those times are going to get more frequent as I get bigger. I tripped down the stairs constantly when I wasn’t with child and no one made a big deal about it. Now a healer is being called if I decide to sit and close my eyes for a little. I can’t go anywhere or do anything without someone constantly watching me. There have been days in the past weeks where I feel as though I’m back in the circle with templars watching my every breath…” Athena couldn’t continue because she was crying too hard.

Cullen wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed uncontrollably bringing tears to his eyes. When her sobbing had quieted, he said softly, “You are everything to me. This,” he paused to place a hand on her growing belly, “is everything to me. Seeing what Selene has gone through terrifies me that it could happen to you... I won’t allow it.”

“I’m not her,” Athena argued softly as her chin started quivering again.

“I know you’re not, but you are the Inquisitor and leader of the Divine’s peace keeping force whether you’re with child not. Which means there’s always a chance that you could be hurt or worse,” Cullen gently lifted her chin so he could look into her violet eyes. He said hoarsely, “I promised you that we would grow old together. I intend to see that promise through, for both of us.” 

“You have the right to worry about me and our unborn child. What I don’t get is why Leliana assumed that I fell and why everyone else wants to watch over me like when I was at the circle,” Athena was irritated again.

“What exactly did you say to her?” 

“That I was startled by someone announcing their arrival to Skyhold, and that I slipped.” Athena answered.

“Maybe she mis-heard you?” Cullen asked as Athena yawned.

“Possibly,” She rested her head on his shoulder and mumbled, “I am so tired.”

“Then let’s get you to a bed,” Cullen stood and reached down to help her up.

“Don’t you have more work to do?” Athena took his hand to pull herself up to stand.

“I asked Darius to take over for me after my meeting with Leliana.”

“What did you tell him?” Athena wondered as they started walking together.

“That I was ill. Don’t be surprised if there is a messenger waiting for you,” Cullen put his arm around her. 

They walked to the main hall where Alistair was in the process of announcing that Selene gave birth to three healthy children and that she was doing well too. As Cullen and Athena walked up to offer their congratulations they heard him murmur, “Now if only she would stop getting pregnant.”

Athena spoke quietly, “I probably shouldn’t be telling you this, but Selene believes that the cure for the taint will make her sterile.”

“That’s not possible. I had taken all of the doses while she was missing and she still managed to get with child,” Alistair told them.

“How?” Cullen inquired.

“She had sent it back to me before the demon caught her. Thank you for the information, I’ll talk to her,” Alistair went on to receive more congratulations. And then a horn blasted inside the main hall causing everyone to jump.

“I can see why that would startle you,” Cullen said softly to Duchess as Alistair made his way over to the horn blaster and berated him.

Marquis Rakona came in and sniffed as if he smelled something foul, “He was only announcing my presence as I require him to do.”

“The Queen of Fereldan just gave birth, she does not need to be disturbed by the likes of you.” Alistair snarled as he clenched and unclenched his fists.

“And who are you to be deciding that?” Marquis Rakona replied indignantly.

“Her husband!” Alistair growled, ready to knock the insufferable Marquis on his ass.

Marquis Rakona bowed deeply and with flourish (I took it to mean that he was disdaining the royals. His tone of voice said the same,) “It will not happen again, Your Majesty!”

Alistair was able to keep his head and stormed back to his wife. With the excitement over, Cullen chuckled as they made their way to the atrium where Athena had to stop to use the water garderobe. She yawned and fell against the wall when she came out. 

Cullen came over to Athena and told her that he was carrying her as he picked her up. She wrapped her arm around his neck and rested her head against his shoulder murmuring, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he whispered carrying her to his office. Before putting her down he gently said, “Athena, I have to put you down.”

“Hmmm…” Athena snuggled more into him and asked sleepily, “why?”

“Because I’m not putting you over my shoulder like the last time I carried you up the ladder,” Cullen slowly lowered her to her feet.

“When was that?” Athena wobbled and fell in to him.

“A couple years ago. Long before you defeated Corypheus,” Cullen steadied her with a hand on each of Athena’s hips.

She looked at the ladder through bleary eyes, “Can’t I sleep on the couch?”

“No, the couch isn’t big enough for you and all of your pillows. I’ll be right behind you.”

Athena sighed and stumbled to ladder (if Curly hadn’t been there she probably would have fell to the floor and slept.) Cullen kept a hand on each of her hips to steady her and guide her to the ladder. She missed the first step about five times and Curly said under his breath, “Maybe I should make you a bed of pillows down here.” 

Fortunately for him Athena was still half asleep… If she heard him, she was too exhausted to comment on it (She didn’t hear him.) Duchess was finally able to get a foot on the first rung. She slowly made her way up the ladder, slipping several times. Cullen would place a hand on his wife’s back to steady her. She stumbled to the bed and collapsed on it. Cullen laughed softly, “What about your pillows?”

“Don’t care…” Athena snuggled into bed with her arm falling over her enlarged belly. Cullen put a pillow underneath her belly, in between her legs, and one at her back. He kissed his already sleeping wife before he left.

When he came down the ladder Darius was waiting for him. Cullen questioned, “Is something wrong?”

“I wanted to see how you were doing,” Darius sat in front of Curly’s desk.

“It’s just a headache, Darius,” Cullen sat behind his desk and looked through some papers.

“Really? When I met with Dorian he had said that the Inquisitor was decidedly not happy. What’d you do?” Darius teased.

“Why is it always assumed that I am the one that upset my wife?” Cullen sighed in frustration.

“Because you’re the only one that would refuse her help,” Darius raised an eyebrow, challenging Curly to deny it.

“I’m fine,” and then they heard Marquis Rakona’s horn blast. Cullen growled, “You wanted a reason for my headache? You have one now.” It blasted again, closer. Curly’s growl became menacing, “By the Maker, I’ll cram that thing down Rakona’s throat!”

Darius laughed. Here was the Commander he knew and loved, “Good to know everything’s all right.”

“Cullen, what’s going on?” Athena called down.

“That blasted noble announcing his presence everywhere he goes. Try and get some rest,” Cullen softened his tone to speak to his wife.

“Is the Inquisitor all right?” Darius asked quietly. He now understood why Cullen said he was ill. A certain Inquisitor pulled the same trick not all that long ago.

“She’s almost six months pregnant and had a very active morning. She’s exhausted,” Cullen shuffled papers around to keep from pacing.

“What did she do?”

“Checked on the queen, had to find the king so he didn’t miss the birth of his children, almost fell off of the ladder because of that infernal horn, and was interrogated by Leliana.”

“Ouch. I’m sure there was an active bright spot though,” Darius smirked.

“For that, you and I are sparring tomorrow,” Cullen blushed, a deep red.

Darius laughed and then the horn blew right outside Cullen’s office door, startling Athena awake and caused her to cry out. Cullen swore and growled, “I’m going to kill him.”

“If you don’t, I will,” Darius said as they both stood.

Marquis Rakona entered and with disdain intoned, “Commander, I was told I could find the Inquisitor here.”

“She’s in a meeting right now,” Cullen made no effort to curb the fury he was feeling toward Rakona.

“Surely you can pull her out of the meeting as the news I have is of supreme importance,” Rakona once again sniffed as if he was smelling something that offended him.

“No, I cannot pull the Inquisitor out of her meeting,” Cullen rebuked the noble fop.

“Who is she in a meeting with? Surely, there is none in this office more important than I.” The Marquis spoke with arrogance and held a kerchief up to his nose.

“The Inquisitor does not need to run her schedule by a guest in her home,” Cullen growled low and menacing. Which was completely lost on the Marquis as he was oblivious to it (not a smart man, that one.)

“I’m sure you can give the Commander the news and he can pass it along,” Darius intervened before Cullen actually killed the Marquis.

“Who are you to speak to me as though I am your equal?” Rakona asked indignantly.

“The Commander’s second,” Darius also had no issue with showing the fop his irritation.

“It really should be for her ears alone. However, as Inquisition forces will no doubt travel with her. There are demons south of Honnleath. My people tell me it is because of a rift. I assume she will leave immediately?” The Marquis demanded. (He apparently had not heard that Duchess couldn’t close rifts anymore.)

“She will leave only if it is necessary for her to do so. We will investigate your claims,” Cullen dismissed the Marquis. He had absolutely no inclination to enlighten the fop. The horn blower put the horn to his lips… Cullen threatened, “If that horn is blown in here or any where near my office again, it will meet with the smelting pot.”

The horn blower gulped as he lowered the horn, and hastily retreated from Curly’s presence. The Marquis looked frightened as well, and quickly followed after his servant. Once the door was closed they heard soft laughter coming from upstairs. Darius quipped, “At least we amused someone.”

Cullen smiled upon hearing his wife’s laughter, relaxing as the tension of wanting to fight left him. Winking at Darius he called out, “Are you going to come down and share what you found so funny?”

Athena descended the ladder with both men watching her, ready to rush in should she slip. Once her feet were safely placed on the floor the men resumed their seats. Athena walked over to her husband and kissed him as he pulled her down on top of him. When the kiss ended, she said, “I imagine the Marquis and his servant had looks of terror as they left?”

Darius chuckled, “That they did, my lady.”

“If I’m so intimidating why were you never afraid of me?” Cullen asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I was terrified of you,” Athena paused to smirk, “just for entirely different reasons.”

“Dorian once told me that after Athena allied the Inquisition with the rebel mages that she was certain she had blown what ever little chance she had with you,” Darius informed them.

Athena blushed bright red and hid her face behind her hair, mumbling, “Oh, Maker!”

Cullen looked from Darius to Athena thinking that this was something he should have heard a long time ago, “Was there a reason you thought that you blew your chance with me?”

Athena rested her hand on her enlarged belly. Looking at Darius she told him, “The next time you see my cousin, you have my permission to kill him.” 

Darius laughed, “But that would leave me without a lover.”

“I’m still waiting on an answer…” Cullen looked pointedly at his wife.

“You yelled at me for allying with them!” She really did not want to have this conversation in front of Darius… Or at all. Athena remembered that night all too well.

“Dorian said that you cried for most of that night, Athena,” Darius’ voice was gentle and sympathetic.

“How would he know? He spent most of that night drinking at Varric’s tent,” Athena grumbled.

“Did you really cry most of the night?” Cullen’s voice was soft as he asked her. Now he knew this was something he should have heard about long before now.

Athena sighed and tried desperately to change the subject, “Thank you for not letting the Marquis meet with me. You can protect me from those sorts of people anytime you like.”

Darius laughed as he stood, “I think I shall take my leave. I’m glad you’re feeling better, Commander.”

“Now you’re going to run away after getting me in trouble?” Athena tsked, “You’re as bad as my cousin.”

“Honored, my lady,” Darius nodded and took his leave.

“Athena, answer me,” Cullen commanded.

“Why does it matter? It’s in the past,” Athena was embarrassed and exasperated. 

Cullen waited patiently as he gently rubbed her back. Athena sighed after several minutes of him watching her and waiting for an answer, “You aren’t going to let it go, are you?” 

He shook his head. She sighed and answered, “Yes, I spent most of that night crying.”

“For the reason Darius said?” Cullen questioned as she placed his free hand where she felt their baby move.

“It’s a bit more complicated than that, but if you’re looking for a simple answer… That one works,” Athena evaded.

“What was so complicated about it?” He smiled as he felt their (I hope your happy Duchess... She’s the one that had to be with child for nine months. Curly wanted to give the credit to her (I agree.) I’m nice and give you a copy before it goes to print, and you tell me to change it! One word!) baby move.

“You weren’t the only reason I was crying. The tears were more of an ‘why did I ever think I had a chance with him’ instead of ‘I blew it’. And at the time, I didn’t know if I had made the right decision. I had never met a Mage outside of my mother that was kind to me so…” Athena paused, “I also didn’t know if I had just let Divine Justinia’s killers into the Inquisition. So yes, I cried all night, but at the time that wasn’t really anything unusual.”

“You had more than a chance with me. I thought I was the one who didn’t have, or deserve a chance with you,” Cullen shifted to kiss her.

“Never,” she whispered against his lips and they kissed tenderly. After the kiss, Athena laid her head on her husband’s shoulder thinking she was only going to rest her eyes… Within minutes she was asleep.

Cullen smiled ruefully as he felt his wife droop. He thought about taking his hand off of her belly to read some of the reports on his desk but ultimately decided against it. Especially as it seemed that the baby was moving more now that their mommy was asleep. Cullen did briefly let go of her enlarged belly to reach down and grab a pillow to put at Athena’s back.

Close to dinner Leliana entered, “Commander?”

“Yes?” Cullen responded, his voice just barely heard.

“Is the Inquisitor all right?” She lowered her voice because she saw who he was holding and took a seat across from him.

“She’s fine. Athena was quite confused as to why you thought she fell,” Cullen kept his voice low.

“When she said that she had slipped… I had just assumed. I was also quite furious with you for not watching her,” It was hard to tell in the darkening room, but it sounded as though Nightingale was blushing.

“In the few weeks we’ve been living here she hadn’t slipped once. I had a meeting to get to and she promised that she would be careful,” Cullen paused, “I doubt she would have slipped at all if that horn hadn’t been blown.”

“Why are you holding her?” Leliana was concerned that something was wrong.

“Because she fell asleep,” Cullen chuckled softly, thinking he was stating the obvious.

“Why don’t you take her upstairs?” 

“To do that I would have to put her over my shoulder. It worked when she wasn’t with child. I think it would be very uncomfortable for her if I did it now, and possibly dangerous,” Cullen became as still as a statue when Duchess shifted. When she settled, he breathed out in relief.

“Marquis Rakona said that he wanted to speak with you about mercenaries in Honnleath,” Leliana informed him.

“Is that what he told you? He came in here demanding to speak with Athena, claiming that there were demons and a rift south of Honnleath. He wants her to leave immediately. I did not inform him that Athena could no longer close rifts,” Cullen could not hide his frustration with the noble fop.

“She’s not going anywhere if it’s more than a day’s ride from here,” Leliana was emphatic.

“You’ll find out what is actually going on, if anything?” Cullen asked.

“I will. Will you two be main hall for dinner?” Leliana got up to leave.

“It depends on what Athena would like to do.”

“Then I will bid you a good night,” Leliana took her leave.

Cullen shifted as he gently said, “Athena, it’s almost dinner time.”

“Hmmm?” Athena snuggled in closer to her husband.

“It’s time to wake up,” Cullen chuckled softly.

Athena opened her violet eyes and noticed that she was partially sitting up, “Cullen, what did you do?”

“Nothing…” Cullen was confused, “Why do you think I did anything?”

“Why am I still on your lap?”

“You fell asleep and I was not going to carry you upstairs!” 

“You should have woken me,” Athena struggled to get off of his lap. Curly tightened his grip, worried that with the amount of shifting Duchess was doing, she would fall.

“No,” Cullen said with final certainty.

“Then you should have put me on the couch or the floor,” Athena tried to pull his locked hands apart. 

Which confounded Curly even more. He thought, why is she struggling so much? “I enjoyed holding you,” Cullen admitted, without blushing. (There goes ten to Sparkler.)

“Cullen, you really need to let me go,” Athena almost groaned. She knew if she didn’t get off of her husband within the next minute, she wouldn’t make it to the garderobe.

“Why?” He asked, bewildered.

“Why do you think?” Athena was, obviously, still trying to get off of him. Cullen laughed as he released her.

Athena ran to the door and flew down the stairs and in to the atrium. Cullen couldn’t help but chuckle as he followed her at a much slower pace. He walked in to the atrium just as Athena was coming out of the water closet. He was still chuckling which earned a glower from his wife. Athena grumbled, “I don’t understand why you find it funny that I have to run to the garderobe so often. You’re the cause of it.”

“I am well aware,” He grinned unrepentantly. “Would you like a private dinner or do you want to eat in the main hall?”

“We’re closer to the main hall,” Athena’s belly rumbled.

Cullen took her hand and pulled it through so they could hook arms and bowed, “My lady.”

Athena shook her head at him, “Your wife.”

“You’re still a lady,” Cullen reiterated as they walked in to the main hall.

Where they immediately heard and quite loudly, “Who is the Commander with? I thought he was married to the Inquisitor.”  
Athena turned her face into Cullen’s arm to hide her laughter. Ruffles, who was quite irritated with the baldness and loudness of the commentary said, “The beautiful lady on the Commander’s arm is Inquisitor Rutherford.”

“She took a commoner’s name?” Marquis Rakona asked, shocked, “and she’s with child! Why is she dressed in pants?”

Athena couldn’t stop chuckling, dismissing the Marquis as another noble fop, and Curly’s growl made it worse. Speaking quietly so only her husband could hear, “Maybe we should have a private dinner.”

Cullen looked down at her, “Why?”

“Because you look as though you want to kill him,” Athena stated simply.

“Your husband isn’t the only one,” Sparkler and I growled.

“Gentlemen…” Athena chastised and then teased, “the shedding of blood will be kept to the sparring ring.”

Cullen stared at her for a long while, “Do not tempt me.”

“I wasn’t trying to tempt you to do anything. I would prefer to not lose my appetite,” and she smiled sweetly at him as she sat down.

Ruffles sat beside her for a moment, “I cannot wait until the Marquis leaves. Your new wardrobe is here, where would you like it sent?”

“Thank the Maker,” Athena looked up at Cullen who was still staring down the Marquis. Shaking her head, she answered Josephine, “our temporary quarters.” 

Ruffles nodded and left, Athena looked back up at her husband and tugged on his hand, “You need to eat too. Your response to the Marquis’ comments can wait.”

Cullen growled low but listened. Because of the Marquis there wasn’t any light hearted teasing. We ate quietly until half way through dinner, Curly got pulled away. 

As soon as he was out the door the Marquis decided his matters were more important and stood behind Duchess’ chair coughing and clearing his throat until she stood to give him her attention. When she did he launched in to her, “Are you able to travel with the condition that you’re in? Why would you fall with child when so many are depending on you? How far along are you? Why, you’re missing an arm! Are you still able to close rifts? I must say that I am shocked to see that you are married to a commoner and that you are wearing pants. Did the circle not teach you how to dress and be a lady? Are you not a mage? Why don’t you put on a show for us?”

Ruffles gasped in horror at the things the Marquis was demanding. My finger was itching to pull Bianca’s trigger. Sparkler looked like he wanted to set the guy on fire. Athena smiled with the grace of Andraste herself, “Marquis, I am with child, it is not a “condition.” I am able to travel if I desire to. As this is the first time I am meeting you, I fail to see how my telling you how far along I am would benefit me or the Inquisition. I wear pants quite frequently even though it is no business of yours. I am a mage, but I do not use my abilities for entertainment. Now if there is nothing else…?” Athena turned away to retake her seat.  
“I need to know when you will leave for Honnleath. It is of the utmost importance,” the Marquis gripped her shoulders and shook her, once, in an apparent attempt to get her to see reason. (If I had had Bianca with me he would’ve been dead on the spot.)

“Let me go,” Athena warned and tried to shrug out of the Marquis’ grip. Cullen returned at that moment and rushed to Duchess’ side, drawing his sword and glared at the Marquis. The Marquis released her quickly. 

Athena’s tone was brutal, “I am aware of what you told the Commander this afternoon. However, I will not be going anywhere until the Inquisition’s agents report back as to what is going on in Honnleath. You are Orlesian, why are you so concerned about a small town in Fereldan?”

The Marquis blushed and took half a step toward Duchess again which had Cullen placing his sword between his wife and the fop. Rakona gulped, “I have relatives in Honnleath and my wife cares for them a great deal.”

“Am I to understand that your wife is not of noble blood? Has the King of Fereldan been informed of this?” Athena asked imperially. (Morrigan must have taught her how.)

“Well, no, she is not, and no, he has not,” The Marquis’ blush deepened, he also backed away from Curly’s sword.

“Then why does it concern you that the Commander of the Inquisition is not of noble birth?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him.

“It does not, Your Worship, I was merely expressing my surprise. My deepest apologies if I have offended,” The Marquis was a deep red, almost purple, bowing as he stumbled to get away from her.

Athena sat down to applause as the Marquis beat a hasty retreat. She looked at her half eaten plate of food and pushed it away. Cullen sat down with her, and ever watchful of his wife, noticed, “Not hungry?” 

Athena shook her head and looked pale. Curly put his arm around her and murmured so softly that I think I was the only one to understand what he said, and that was because I read his lips, “I’m going to kill him.”

Athena rested her head on Cullen’s shoulder and closed her eyes, “I wonder if Morrigan would be willing to turn him in to a toad.”

Dorian chuckled, “After what he said to you. She’d be willing to turn him into a bug and squish him.”

“The Inquisitor’s cousin wishes me to change the shape of someone?” Morrigan inquired as she sat on the other side of Athena. Taking note of the half empty plate and Duchess’ paleness she asked, “Inquisitor?”

“It’s nothing, Morrigan…” Athena sighed and rested her hand on her belly. Cullen rolled his eyes, but knew he was too angry to say anything.

“Considering the Commander just rolled his eyes, one would think ‘twas something,” Morrigan gently prodded.

“I’ve been feeling off today and having a war of words did not make me feel better,” Athena spoke quietly, trying to be as still as possible to calm her upset stomach.

Morrigan’s rare gentleness turned to hardness and anger, “What did that good for nothing noble do?”

“Which good for nothing noble? There are quite a few here,” Cullen was still on the verge of violence but right now Duchess’ well being took precedence.

“Marquis Rakona,” She practically snarled.

“In the Inquisitor’s defense she handled herself superbly. She had him blushing so much he was almost purple,” I was proud of Duchess. Athena suddenly stood up and ran for the atrium. Cullen ran after her.

Morrigan watched it all with a growing tempest inside her on her friend’s behalf, “I want to know what he did and I want to know now.”

Dorian and I explained to Morrigan what transpired. Sparkler finished with, “The thing that upset her the most was hearing Cullen referred to as common.”

“Are you sure of that, Sparkler?” I asked.

“I would stake my life on it,” Dorian answered earnestly.

“The one bet I’m not willing to take you up on,” I softly remarked.

**

Cullen heard her retching from the water closet, opening the door he saw Athena kneeling in front of the toilet, trying desperately to keep her hair back from the half eaten meal that decided to not stay down. He crouched down beside her and held her hair back until she had nothing left in her. Collapsing against him, she whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. Do you want me to carry you?” Cullen gently offered. Athena nodded and reached up to wrap her arm around his neck. Picking her up he kissed her forehead and carried her back to his office. After he laid her on the couch he grabbed some pillows for her and started to leave.

“Cullen?” Athena lifted her head, she felt very weak.

“I’m going to make our excuses. I’ll be right back,” he answered softly as she laid her head back down and closed her eyes.

“This is not going to end well for the Marquis,” I remarked upon seeing Curly enter the hall. 

Ruffles saw him as well and started to stand to stop him. Bull put an arm around her and forced her to sit down, “Don’t. If I walked in on him grabbing you like that, he would be a stain on the floor. I do not have the restraint the Commander does.”

Before Cullen reached the Marquis he stopped to talk with Morrigan, “Will you check on Athena? The Marquis and I have some business to attend to.”

“She is that ill?” Morrigan sounded as though she was worried. Cullen gave a single nod of his head, staring down the Marquis. Morrigan left to check on Athena.

Curly made his way to the Marquis and growled, “You and I have some business to attend to.” 

Cullen turned on his heel and left to await the Marquis in the sparring ring, pacing like a caged lion. The Marquis slowly followed Cullen, until he saw the sparring ring. He then smirked, “Sparring is a hobby of mine, Commander. Are you certain you want to do this?”

Cullen nodded and continued to pace as the Marquis took off his finery (which took five minutes.) When the Marquis entered the ring and motioned that he was ready Cullen charged him like an angry bull, shoulder blocking Rakona in the stomach. With an “oof” the Marquis fell to the ground. The fight barely lasted five minutes. The Marquis may have gotten off one hit before crying for mercy. 

Cullen snarled, “You are a guest in the Inquisitor’s home, and should you lay a hand on my wife again, I will kill you.”

Cullen left the Marquis laying in the dirt and came back into the main hall. I walked over to him, “That didn’t take long.” 

“It wasn’t much of a fight. Excuse me,” Cullen walked over to Leliana and Josephine, “Does the Marquis need to stay here while we investigate his claims?”

“He does not,” Leliana informed him.

“Good because until he does leave, I’m keeping Athena far away from him,” Cullen told them.

“I’ll make sure he leaves on the morrow. How is she?” Josephine was concerned.

“Ill and I told her that I would be right back,” Cullen took his leave, having no patience to be polite.

**

Morrigan knocked, when she didn’t get a response, she entered Cullen’s office and called out, “Athena?”

“Cullen isn’t coming right back?” Athena slowly sat up.

“I know not… I believe the Commander was more worried about leaving you alone. How are you feeling?” Morrigan inquired.

“Better… I think,” Athena moved some pillows so Morrigan could sit.

“You think?” Morrigan sat.

“I’m still nauseous and not feeling myself, but nothing like it was.”

“Where did the Marquis touch you? Are you bruised? Your cousin said that toad of a noble shook you?”

“On the shoulders. He only shook me once. And I don’t think so…?” Athena sighed, “I wish I could speak my mind like you do.”

“Your friends thought you did very well,” Morrigan encouraged her. Athena rolled her eyes in response causing Morrigan to chuckle. “We missed you this afternoon.”

Athena closed her eyes, “I fell asleep, I’m sorry.”

“Between running to find Alistair, almost falling off the ladder, being interrogated by Leliana, and then having your husband almost run over you, ‘tis understandable.”

Athena chuckled, bewildered that Morrigan knew of her hectic morning, “How did you hear all this?”

“The dwarf… Varric?” Morrigan questioned, unsure of my name.

Athena laughed. She knew I was once again being her bodyguard and complaining that she had to do too much, “Yes, Varric.”

Then they heard, “The Commander and the Marquis are sparring!”

“It’s nearly dark, what are they doing?!” From another.

“I’m not surprised that that didn’t take long,” the first voice said.

“As angry as the Commander looked, I’m surprised the fop is still alive.” The second voice commented. 

Morrigan and Athena looked ruefully at each other and started laughing. Morrigan said, “I think your Commander needs thicker doors.”

“And doors with locks,” Athena chuckled and sighed, “I miss my quarters.”

“When I went to see Selene today for dinner, she was already ordering people to pack,” Morrigan informed her.

Athena’s eyes grew wide, surprised at the will the queen had, “How does she have the energy to do that?!”

“She’s ordering people from the bed. Ellendra has said that she’s not allowed to be moved for at least a day,” Morrigan answered.

“Still… To have the presence of mind to do that,” Athena hoped they didn’t expect the same of her right after giving birth.

“She said that she’s taken advantage of your kind regard for long enough, and you know that she never listens,” Morrigan reminded her.

“True,” Athena said as the door slowly opened to her husband almost tiptoeing in so he wouldn’t disturb her. Athena chuckled softly, “Only you would sneak in to your own office.”

“I didn’t want to disturb you,” Cullen blushed as he closed the door.

Morrigan stood and as she was leaving, “Have a good night, my friends.”

Cullen sat beside Athena, “You are feeling better, I hope?”

“I am… Thank you,” Athena blushed, embarrassed by getting so ill.

“You’re welcome,” Cullen put his arm around her.

“Now what’s this I hear about you sparring with the Marquis?” Athena raised an eyebrow at him.

“How-?!” Cullen asked, bewildered.

“The soldiers on watch saw you. You need thicker doors,” Athena smiled at him.

“And locks,” Cullen griped and then noticed that his wife wasn’t yelling at him for taking unnecessary risks, “You’re not upset…”

“No, I’m not upset. What he was saying was uncalled for…” Athena started.

“What he said?!” Cullen was disturbed by her comment as he only knew of the fop touching her.

Athena closed her eyes and sighed despondently, “You usually hear these things before I get to tell you… I assumed you knew.”

Cullen calmed down and stroked Duchess’ cheek, “Tonight, they didn’t. What did the Marquis say?”

Athena sighed again, she really wasn’t used to this, but she told him everything, including about how the Marquis shook her. Cullen was livid after hearing her tale but chose to tamp down on his rage so he could care for his wife. But he did have to say, “What he did and said to you was uncalled for.”

“I was actually surprised that there wasn’t a fight in the main hall,” Athena commented airily.

“You said that you didn’t want any fighting in the main hall,” Cullen was confused.

“All right… I was surprised that I was actually listened to this time,” Athena chuckled.

“What does that mean?” Duchess was only making Curly’s confusion worse.

“When we went back to the Storm Coast to stop the Venatori, the elf Bull met supposedly said some unkind things about me, and he left the worse for wear.” Athena pulled her feet up under her and leaned against her husband.

“What was said?” Cullen was thinking her timing could have been way better for this story, as he was already struggling to keep his fury in check.

“Nothing that hadn’t been said to me a thousand times before. I told the three of them to let it go. I left to go break down my tent and by the time I came back the elf was on the ground and bleeding. They also refused to let me heal him. When I asked what happened they refused to tell me,” The tone in her voice said she was still frustrated by the event.

“Was that the same time you were angry with them for a week?”

“Yes,” Athena yawned.

“I’m sure that whatever he said he deserved it,” Cullen defended us.

“It took me five minutes to break down my tent. I came back to a man bleeding on the ground, most likely unconscious, and they wouldn’t let me heal him…. They still won’t tell me what happened.” Athena sighed in frustration.

“This is something that worries you?” 

“Yes,” Athena said, “they’re usually so open… At times too open, and with this they’re silent.”

“I’ll talk to them,” Cullen sighed and started to caress her shoulder and the base of her neck. She let out an involuntary gasp when he touched where the Marquis had hold of her. Cullen instantly stopped, “Athena?”

“Apparently the Marquis was rougher than I thought,” Athena said softly. 

Cullen sat up and started unbuttoning the shirt his wife was wearing to pull it down to see her shoulders. Athena was embarrassed, “Cullen, is this really necessary?”

“Yes,” he responded with an angry fire blazing in his brown eyes.

“Then can we at least go upstairs?” Athena pleaded.

Curly’s anger instantly turned to concern, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, but I’ve been on display enough today, and people have a habit of walking in on us here,” Athena blushed. Cullen nodded and followed her up the ladder.

Once they were in the bedroom Athena took off her shirt. Because of dwarven lights there was no need for candles. Cullen took hold of her shoulders and looked closely at her. The bruises formed a perfect ring around the base of her neck. He swore as he released her. Giving voice to the thought he had had repeatedly since Athena told him what happened when he got pulled away, “Maker’s breath, I’m going to kill him.”

“No, you are not. I’m sure he’s already much worse off than I am and I doubt he realized that he was doing it,” Athena dismissed her bruises as she undressed the rest of the way.

“Athena, he came inches from choking you. He never should have laid a hand on you,” Cullen paced around the room.

“No, he shouldn’t have but he did and I’m sure you made him aware of the error of his ways,” Athena opened her trunk that   
was now filled with clothing that was a little too big. She murmured as she put on a night shift, “Thank you, Josie.”

“I didn’t know that he had injured you,” he was still pacing off the restless anger of wanting to punch the Marquis, repeatedly, again.

Athena sighed in defeat and sort of changed the subject, “We should talk to Alistair in the morning.”

“What?” Cullen slowly realized the subject change, “It’s going to take a while to figure out what’s going on in Honnleath. I don’t want you worrying about it. I wouldn’t put it past the Marquis to lie about why he’s here.”

“Whether or not we’re needed, Alistair should still be informed of the Marquis’ claims. He is the king of Fereldan.”

“He also just became a father to triplets. He should have more than a day to enjoy them,” Cullen watched his wife stretch and yawn.

“We still need his approval and input. I have no desire to be an invading army,” she sat wearily on the bed rubbing and scratching the stretched skin of her belly.

“Tired?” Cullen sat beside her.

“Extremely,” Athena almost whispered as she leaned against him.

“When did you start wearing a shift to bed?” Cullen asked as they laid down.

“Last night,” Athena blushed as she adjusted all of her pillows.

“Why?”

“I woke up in the middle of the night needing to use the water closet,” Athena snuggled against him.

“Why didn’t you wake me?” Cullen put one arm underneath her head and held her hand with the free one.

Athena chuckled softly, “There wasn’t time.” 

Cullen got out of bed and moved some of the dwarven lights to his office. When he got back in bed she chastised, “You worry too much.”

“You were saying earlier today how you weren’t going to be able to keep climbing the ladder soon. I would sleep easier knowing that you would be able to see. I still want you to wake me though,” Cullen assumed his former position.

“By the end of the week we’ll be in our quarters again,” she whispered, pulling his hand to where she felt the baby moving and closed her eyes. 

“Maker willing,” he softly breathed out. He tried to stop his anger and thoughts of the day so he could enjoy feeling their baby move. Cullen sighed, knowing it was going to be a sleepless night. Unlike Athena, he believed the Marquis knew exactly what he was doing when he came so close to choking her.

**

The morning dawned with not one but two horns blowing as the sun rose over the Frostbacks startling our lovers awake. Athena groaned, pulling a pillow over head to muffle the noise. Cullen growled and swore, “Maker’s breath! They could at least wait until the sun was fully over the mountains!”

Athena’s chuckle was muffled by her pillow and so was her, “Good morning, my love.”

Cullen took the pillow from her grasp, holding it just out of reach and kissed her, “Would you like to try that again?”

“The kissing, yes,” Athena was hopeful as she opened her violet eyes. And then a horn blew again. Athena quipped as she got out of bed, “If we weren’t awake before, we are now.”

Cullen didn’t respond to her as he had gotten lost in thought. She turned around after pulling out a deep blue dress. She watched him quietly for a couple minutes noting how tired he looked, “Cullen, are you all right?”

“Hmm?” He pulled back to the present and smiled at her, “I’m fine.”

“You look tired,” Athena pulled on her dress.

“I didn’t get to sleep until late,” Cullen got dressed as well.

“Why?” Athena brushed her hair.

“You can’t wear that,” Cullen said softly, noticing the deep décolletage and how bruised her neck and shoulders were now that he had more than dwarven light to go off of.

“Why not?”

“Because the base of your neck and your shoulders are covered in bruises and unless you want the Marquis to die five minutes after we leave here, you need to find something that will cover both,” Cullen held up his breast plate so she could see the bruises.

Athena gasped, “I didn’t think he had hold of me that tight.” Athena took the dress off and found a beige and silver one that had a high neck and used a scarf to cover what the dress could not. 

Cullen thought Athena looked unsteady as she came down the ladder and stood close to it in case she needed assistance. When she descended the ladder fully, she wobbled a little. Cullen was concerned, “Are you all right?” 

“I still feel off balance and a little weak,” Athena half smiled at her husband.

“Do you want to talk to Ellendra or Caerwin?” Cullen held open his office door for her.

“My being off balance is only going to get worse. The weakness may be my body telling me not to do so much.” Athena smiled up at her husband as they went in to the atrium. She, of course, had to stop to use the garderobe. As she came out the dueling horns sounded off again, causing both her and Cullen to jump.

“If this nonsense doesn’t cease, I will have a massive headache by the end of the day,” Cullen griped as they entered the main hall. Upon entering who do our lovers spot except Marquis Rakona… 

Athena quickly took Cullen’s hand, “Why don’t we have breakfast with the King and Queen?”

Cullen growled low and menacing as he stared down the Marquis. Athena turned so she was standing in between Curly and the Marquis, “Cullen, please?”

Cullen looked down at his wife’s worried expression and nodded. As they walked by they heard the Marquis whining to Ruffles, “All I did was touch her! Look at my face! How can I go home like this?!”

Cullen stopped and growled again. Athena tugged on his hand, when that didn’t work she reminded him, “Cullen, I’m hungry.”

“Go eat,” he didn’t look at her and tried to pull his hand away from hers.

“Not without you,” Athena said with a quiet command. 

Cullen stared at the Marquis for a couple minutes, honor demanding that he pound him to a pulp again. But he also wanted to honor his wife’s wishes. Bull walked in and saw Curly’s stare. Tiny walked over to Ruffles and put a heavy hand on her shoulder still watching Cullen, “Kadan, why don’t we move this meeting in to your office?”

Josephine nodded and motioned for the Marquis to follow her. Athena looked up at Cullen, “He’s not going anywhere, Bull won’t let him. Can we please go and talk to the King and Queen now?”

“I thought you wanted to eat?” Cullen was confused as to why Athena no longer wanted to eat.

“I do, but the faster we get the Marquis out of Skyhold the faster you can stop thinking of ways to kill him,” Athena answered as they walked up the stairs.

“Athena, he hurt you. He came here supposedly seeking aid and then he asked questions, made comments that he had no right to make, and he hurt you. You cannot ask me to not make him pay for that,” He reminded her with far more calm than he felt.

“You already did, last night,” Athena argued.

“That was before I knew how badly he bruised you, what he said, and that he had the audacity to shake you!” The calm tone he was using before had completely disappeared.

Athena sighed, wishing that Curly could see past what happened, “It’s not the first time someone seeking help has been overzealous… It’s not going to be the last.”

“We aren’t at war anymore. Times may still be desperate, but they’re not what they were. He had no right,” Cullen countered as he rapped on the door.

“Are you upset as the Commander of the Inquisition forces or as my husband?” She wondered at how she could get him to let this go. They heard a muffled, “Come in,” before Curly could answer.

“Both. Out of respect for what you’ve done for Thedas he never should have asked such intimate questions or made his opinions known. He had no right to touch you, whether you were a maid or Andraste herself,” Cullen was itching to pummel the Marquis again as they walked up the stairs.

“Apparently we’ve missed quite a bit in secluding ourselves,” Selene said upon greeting our lovers. 

“It’s a long story,” Athena hoped to avoid further discussion of it.

“It wouldn’t happen to have anything to do with Marquis Rakona?” Alistair asked. Athena groaned and Alistair chuckled, “I’ll take that as a yes.”

“He claims that his wife has relatives in Honnleath and that it's being attacked by demons,” Athena quickly spoke in the hopes of preventing a discussion about what happened last night.

“This is news to me. There have been reports of a little trouble, but nothing that would require the Inquisition to get involved. Isn’t the Marquis Orlesian?” Alistair questioned.

“And I have heard nothing of him having a wife,” Selene played with the blanket.

“I can add lying to my list of reasons for wanting him dead,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena sighed in irritation, “That’s all you need, another reason to hate the man.”

“You may not think what he did to you as serious, but I do,” Cullen argued, irritated that she couldn’t see how close she came to being harmed last night.

“You’ve made that abundantly clear,” Athena sighed wearily.

Alistair and Selene looked at each other with worried expressions as they had only seen our lovers good naturedly fight. Alistair requested, “Why don’t you two start from the beginning?”

Cullen told of all that transpired with the Marquis yesterday much to Athena’s displeasure. He also spoke of what he and Leliana talked about regarding Honnleath. Alistair thought everything over carefully, “It does sound as though the Marquis has an ulterior motive. My messengers should be here by noon time. I think I should talk to the Marquis as well.”

“I’ll come with you,” Cullen responded eagerly, hoping to give himself and his wife some time to cool off.

Athena walked out on to the balcony as the king and Curly left. With her eyes closed she breathed deeply of the mountain air and tried to will away all the times that someone had hurt her because they were desperate for help. She wished she could explain it to Cullen but doubted that he would listen… After all he could be right.

Selene watched Athena for a while. After breakfast was delivered Selene spoke, “It would be nice if those we love would allow us to decide what insults or hurts needed to be defended, wouldn’t it?”

Athena half heartedly smiled as she came back in to the room, “It’s not so much that… It’s more that Cullen won’t let it go.”

“He defended your honor before he saw the full extent of the bruising?” Selene inquired as she ate her breakfast.

“That sounds like the voice of experience,” Athena looked at the table laden with food and felt half nauseous so she grabbed a chocolate chip cookie.

“In a way.” Selene chuckled, “Right after Alistair and I were married a noble showed up demanding to speak with me. He didn’t get his wish, so he snuck into my room. He fell asleep on my floor and when I got out of bed, I tripped over him. I screamed, Alistair and the guards came running and as he was taken away he was shouting about how I had bewitched him. Alistair was so angry that he didn’t check to see if I was hurt. When he came back up he saw a black and blue mark on my face and disappeared again. We fought for a week straight.”

“I don’t want to fight Cullen, Selene.” Athena sighed, taking a seat near the queen. “I just wish he could see that what the Marquis did is minor compared to what others have done. I have been called far worse than mage and entertainer. I’ve also had far worse done to me than bruised shoulders.”

“You were at war and not with child,” Selene reminded her.

“That’s not necessarily true,” Athena blushed.

“What happened?”

“One of the maids here was being beaten by her husband in the atrium and I walked in on them. I was pushed so hard as he ran that I fell into the wall and the maid spat at me,” Athena laid her hand on top of her belly.

“When did this happen? Were they caught?” Selene got out of bed and placed her empty plate on the table.

“Two months ago, and yes they were. Apparently it was consensual...” Athena paused and blushed, “They like it rough.”

“That should be something they do in their chambers. I take it that Cullen doesn’t know?” Selene stood in front of the water closet.

“Do you think he’d allow me to go anywhere without a body guard if he did?” Athena asked in response.

Selene chuckled as she went into the garderobe, “True.” 

When she came out of the garderobe, she noticed that Athena was on her second cookie, “You can have more than chocolate chip cookies.”

“It’s the only thing that looks appetizing to me right now,” She took a bite out of her cookie, wondering why the nauseous feeling wasn’t going away.

Selene laughed, “I understand. Have there been any other times?”

“On a daily basis.” Athena chuckled and then grew serious, “The worst one was when I first started to show. A noblewoman held a knife to my belly and said that she should cut the babe from me as it would be better off dead than having a mage for a mother.”

Selene gasped, “Please tell me that she didn’t go away unscathed.”

“She didn’t, but she also accosted me in the middle of the courtyard. Screaming at the top of her lungs. How that one was kept from Cullen…” Athena was still astounded.

“Who heard her?”

“Everyone. She was screaming so loud that the soldiers from the battlements came down. The only person that didn’t show up was my husband,” Athena smirked at the memory. She could almost laugh about it now.

“Where was he?”

“I don’t know,” Athena chuckled.

“What happened to the noblewoman?” Selene sat on the bed.

“I trapped her in a cage where I could have squeezed the life out of her… I very nearly did,” Athena answered quietly.

“And then?”

“I don’t know. Leliana, Bull, and Dorian took her to the dungeon… I guess I should inquire after her,” Athena sighed. She had avoided dealing with the woman, but she didn’t want the woman attacking her again, especially now.

“I wouldn’t either, my dear,” Selene was supportive, “I can see now why you thought what the Marquis did and said wasn’t that big of a deal.”

“My shoulders may look like they hurt, but they don’t. I’ve had to answer worse questions. The thing that bothered me the most was that the Marquis referred to Cullen as less than just because he isn’t a noble… Whatever that means,” Athena griped.

“You’re a noble, you know exactly what that means,” Selene laughed.

“I went to the circle at seven years old. Most of the “nobles” I knew wouldn’t lift a finger to help someone else. Outside of Dorian and Josie, the best people I know have no “noble” title, and they’re the ones that are willing to drop everything to help another,” Athena explained.

“And what of you, Athena? Shouldn’t you be the standard that all nobles live up to?” Selene asked.

“Yes, lets have everyone have ancient elven magicks attach to them and if they don’t use that ancient magic that we know nothing of, it will kill them. Even if you do use it, it’ll still try to kill you. Other than once being able to close rifts, I’m just an outcast,” Athena looked out past the balcony. Her voice edged with bitterness, “The people I believed to be my parents either didn’t want me or wanted me to be their posession. 

“In the circle I was hated by mages because the First Enchanter, my mother, would spend an extra five minutes of her day with me, at sunrise before anyone else was awake. The templars didn’t care for me because I was a mage and again the “favored” status reared is ugly head as I would often times be invited to have dinner with the Knight Commander, who turned out to be my father.”

“No wonder Morrigan is so protective of you,” Selene said quietly.

“I may have grown up surrounded by people but I was just as alone as she was in the Korcari Wilds,” Athena’s voice was far away, lost to another time and place.

**

Cullen and Alistair only took a few minutes to talk to the Marquis (no, Curly didn’t kill him or even attack him… Do you really think I would leave something like that out?) And returned to their lady wives. However, they stood at the bottom of the stairs listening for quite some time. Alistair watched Cullen’s expression darken like an on coming storm and guessed, “I take it that you didn’t know any of this?”

“Athena’s referred to herself as an outcast before. That my wife and child were threatened, and that she was thrown against a wall… No,” Cullen answered quietly, trying to not give their position away, but the anger was churning right below the surface.

“A word of advice. Don’t be angry at Athena,” Alistair quietly suggested.

“She should have told me,” Cullen almost growled.

“It was handled. Why would she want to worry you further?” Alistair some what understood Duchess’ point.

“Because it’s my duty as her husband and Commander of the Inquisition forces to make sure everyone is protected… Especially her,” Cullen wanted to shout at the king for not listening, but grumbled instead. 

Selene chuckled and whispered, “I have a feeling that we’re being spied on.”

Athena was pulled back to the present with that remark, “I’m sorry?”

Selene smiled at her and whispered, “I think we’re being spied on.” And then louder, “As soon as Ellendra or Caerwin will allow me to walk down the stairs we will return your quarters to you.”

“Thank you,” Athena quickly caught on to what Queenie was doing.

“Any plans for your return?” Selene inquired loudly to make sure her voice carried down the stairs.

“I think I can come up with something,” Athena smirked, “Maybe we should redecorate the room in pink.”

Cullen stifled a groan. Alistair chuckled softly at him. Selene stood and walked over to stand near the railing, “You could hang ribbons from the balcony above your bed.”

“I don’t know… I’ve always been partial to tulle myself,” Athena stood and walked over to stand beside Selene.

“What color were you thinking?” Selene looked up at the balcony.

“Orange,” Athena answered, “and maybe hang ribbons from the balconies outside. I want to move the bed to where the settee is and the settee out to the east balcony.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Selene agreed as the women shared a smirk, hearing a low growl come from the stairwell.

“We should redecorate Cullen’s office, too. I’ll write Sera and see if she has any ideas,” Athena smiled wickedly.

“You will not!” Cullen almost roared sending the ladies in to gales of laughter.

“It appears that we’ve been found out,” Alistair chuckled as they made their way up the stairs.

"You didn’t have to spy on us,” Selene chastised her husband.

“It sounded as though it was a fairly serious conversation. We didn’t want to interrupt,” Alistair took hold of his wife’s hand.

“We noticed,” Athena griped, still unhappy about how Cullen wouldn’t let what happened last night go.

“What did the Marquis say?” Selene asked to fill the heavy silence that had suddenly filled the room with our lovers staring intensely at each other.

“He apologized profusely and still claims that there is a rift and mercenaries in Honnleath,” Alistair informed her.

“Our people haven’t arrived yet?” Selene sat back down on the bed with her husband beside her. 

“Not yet,” Alistair answered.

“Is the Marquis still alive?” Athena need to know as she watched Cullen pace.

“He is and no worse than when the Commander left him last night,” Alistair responded for Cullen as Curly was too lost in thought of all that he overheard and how he was going to talk to Athena about it.

Athena sighed in relief, “Thank you.”

Cullen stopped pacing to look at his wife, confused as to why she would be thanking Alistair. Instead she was looking at him. He sighed and said quietly, “We need to talk.” 

“How much did you hear?” Athena wanted to prepare a defense.

Cullen stood before her and pushed her heavy hair back from her shoulder, “You don’t want to know.”

“I’m going to find out anyway, aren’t I?” Athena guessed. Cullen nodded. She sighed, “Then I guess we should go.” Athena looked at the royals, “You’ll let us know what your messengers say?”

“We will,” Selene assured her.

Cullen and Athena left and walked quietly to the atrium where Athena had to use the garderobe. While she was in there he paced wondering what to start off with. He also wondered why those events hadn’t been reported to him immediately. When she came out she watched him pace for a while. Finally, she spoke, “Cullen, I…”

“Not here,” he interrupted, walking over to her and taking her hand.

“And your office offers more privacy?” Athena questioned. She had once compared his office to bustling marketplace with everyone coming and going.

“There would at least be places to sit,” Cullen said as they walked to his office. Once they were sitting in his office he asked, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Do you tell me of every injury you get training the soldiers?” Athena asked in response.

“That’s different,” Cullen griped, irritated that she would compare what he does to her being attacked.

“How? I see the bruises you get, you don’t tell me how you got them.” Athena said.

“You know how I get them. You’ve seen me train with the soldiers. What I don’t understand is why I wasn’t informed of you being threatened and thrown against a wall,” Cullen got up to pace.

“I’m a mage and I’m the Inquisitor, getting threatened happens on a daily basis. It’s something that’s happened to me daily since I was taken to the circle. It’s not going to change or stop any time soon. These are things you already know, Cullen. Why should I worry you unnecessarily?” 

“You’re not worrying me unnecessarily,” Cullen paused in his pacing and returned to sitting beside her, “I’m your husband. Don’t I deserve to know when you’re hurt?”

“I wasn’t hurt. I still know how to protect myself…” Athena paused, “If I would have told you about these events right after they happened, what would your response have been?” 

“If I couldn’t be with you, I would have a guard with you,” Cullen was absolutely certain with his response.

“I need to be guarded in my own home like when I was at the circle? After saving Thedas?” Athena asked sadly.

“If it meant protecting you, I would do anything,” Cullen said softly to hide the lump in his throat.

“Should I put a guard on you as well? I always worry that Darius or Johan are going to come running and tell me that you’re gravely injured,” Athena reached up to play with his hair.

“I’m not as important as you are,” Cullen whispered.

“You couldn’t be more wrong,” Duchess had tears in her eyes. “I would have given up long ago without you. Corypheus would still be terrorizing Thedas or would have won by now without you being my rock and commanding the Inquisition forces. I know what the soldiers think of you. It is you that inspires them, not me.

“This,” she placed his hand on her growing belly where the baby obliged by moving around, “would not be possible without you. You are very important to the Inquisition, to your soldiers, to me.”

“I wasn’t able to close rifts,” Cullen choked out.

“So? I’m not able to anymore either. You keep me from curling up into a ball of despair and refusing to get out of bed.” Athena chuckled softly, “You have the unenviable and impossible job of keeping me sane.”

Cullen half smiled and caressed her cheek, “It’s not that hard.”

“For you, maybe. Dorian quite frequently complains,” Athena smiled and then grew serious, “I don’t tell you about all of the threats I get because I don’t want you training the soldiers and being distracted by worrying about me.”

“I worry about you anyway, Athena.”

“Well, stop it,” she teased, trying to get her sweet, over protective husband to smile.

Curly barked out a laugh, “Never.” And then he grew serious, “You should have at least told me about the woman holding a knife to you.”

“I still don’t understand how you didn’t hear her screaming,” Athena shook her head. “I promise that I will tell you about the big ones."

“Thank you,” Cullen kissed her.

“I love you,” She whispered against his lips as she started to pull his shirt out of his pants.

Gently taking her hand in his to stop her, he whispered, “I love you, too. Why don’t we go upstairs first?”

“Your desk is right there,” Athena glanced at it before she kissed him again.

“All of the pillows are upstairs,” he tried again.

“We’re not sleeping on the desk,” Athena murmured sultrily after kissing his neck.

Cullen shook his head and released her hand to pull her against him and kiss his wife passionately. With her hand now free Athena continued and succeeded in pulling his shirt out of his pants. He whipped it off and it landed half way across the room. Cullen moved his hands up underneath her dress and was very tempted to tear it off of her, but as they worked together in getting it off, the dress lived to see another day. 

He grabbed her hips as he stood and pulled Athena down to a supine position, she asked seductively, “We’re not making it to the desk, are we?”

“Wife,” Cullen growled as his shoes and pants hit the floor. He was on top of her in seconds. Kissing Duchess’ expanded belly, her chest, her neck, and finally her lips. Before he lent himself completely to the desire coursing through him, he paused, “Are you sure you’ll be comfortable here?”

Athena wrapped her arm around his neck and pulled him down on top of her. After she kissed her husband long and hard, she whispered, “You dear, sweet, man. I’ll be fine.” 

Cullen pulled her closer to him and supported her back with his hands as he entered her. They reached the heights of desire together. Immediately after they were interrupted by the door opening and Sparkler asking, “Commander?”

Cullen looked down at Athena and growled as Dorian looked around the door, “For the love of Andraste! Don’t you two have a bedroom?!”

“Dorian, leave!” Athena exclaimed.

“Yes… That would be a fantastic idea,” Sparkler quickly left and closed the door behind him.

“I’m going to kill your cousin,” Curly grumbled as he got off of Athena and rushed to get dressed. 

Athena sat up slowly, slightly wincing as she stretched out her back and then rubbed her neck. Closing her eyes to fight against the nausea turning her stomach, she whispered, “I should have listened to you.”

Curly was completely dressed by the time Athena fully sat up. He grabbed her dress and sat beside her, “Are you all right?”

“A little stiff,” Athena smiled wanly at him as she slipped her dress on and then murmured, looking at the floor, “Where are my…?”

Thoroughly confused as he watched his wife get on her knees, Cullen asked, “Where are your… What?”

Athena looked up at him, “My underclothes.”

“You weren’t wearing any…” Cullen trailed off, still lost.

“Yes, I was. I remember putting them...” Athena stopped reaching under the couch and sat on the floor, “are you sure I wasn’t?”

“I think I would have noticed if you were,” Cullen wasn’t sure if he should worry or chuckle.

“I could have swore I put them on this morning… Oh well,” she shrugged and held out her hand to Cullen, “Help me up, please?”

Curly took her hand and put an arm around her waist to help her up, “Athena, what’s going on? Are you feeling all right?”

Athena chuckled softly, “I feel a little off, but that’s not unusual. Do you remember Selene and I talking about forgetting things?”

“Yes, why?” He asked as she walked over to the ladder.

“Apparently, I forgot to put underclothes on this morning and then I forgot that I didn’t put them on.”

“I’m not following,” poor Curly was still confused.

Athena came over and lightly kissed him, “It’s a pregnancy thing. Don’t be surprised if I call down in five minutes asking why I’m up there.”

“And you want me to not worry about you?” Cullen quipped as he raised an eyebrow at his wife.

“Forgetting little things is perfectly normal,” Athena started to go up the ladder with Cullen watching her every move ready to spring in to action should she slip. Once Duchess made it to the top she called down a little breathless, “Don’t forget about my cousin.”

Cullen grumbled, “In a minute he’s going to be pounding on the door.” 

It took less than a minute with Dorian praying, “I hope you’re presentable.”

“What do you want, Dorian?” Cullen asked grumpily.

“To not see my cousin and her husband naked, among other things,” Sparkler retorted.

“Try knocking and you won’t have to,” Athena called down.

Cullen smirked at Athena’s response, “Why are you here, Dorian?”

“To play chess,” Dorian smiled.

“Not today,” Cullen shuffled papers around on his desk.

“You haven’t wanted to play in weeks. What’s going on?” Sparkler asked.

“Too much to do and not enough time to do it in,” Cullen sighed. At this point, all he wanted to do was spend time with Duchess. (Our Curly, not wanting to work... I’m so proud!)

“All the more reason then,” Sparkler smiled brightly.

Cullen glanced up the ladder and said, “That is true but…”

“You worry too much,” Dorian teased.

“Darius is always telling me to go easy on him for fear of worrying you,” Curly looked pointedly at Sparkler.

“You are entirely too rough on him,” Dorian complained and went back to his original purpose, “Are we playing chess or not?”

Cullen gave a last look up the ladder and sighed. He thought that trouncing Dorian in chess might improve his mood, “We’ll play.”

“Don’t sound so enthused about it,” Sparkler groused as he took his usual seat.

Cullen pulled out his chess set and informed his cousin by marriage, “There appears to be something going on in Honnleath.”

“And you’re afraid that Athena will be needed. The Marquis’ information was correct?” Sparkler asked.

“We should know by this afternoon.”

“Then we shall endeavor to take your mind off of it,” Sparkler moved his first piece, “Ana and I have been playing.”

“So you think you can win against me?” Curly smirked and moved his first piece.

“She always wins against you,” Dorian countered Curly’s move.

“She’s ten. How old are you?” 

“You let her win?!” Sparkler asked, incredulous.

“At times,” Cullen smiled and made a move.

“And here I thought you had a reputation to uphold,” Dorian smirked and made his move.

As the game progressed Cullen started wondering what happened to Athena. So much so that he was making so many mistakes that Dorian was winning. Half way through the game Curly stood, “I’ll be right back.”

“Where are you going? I’m finally winning,” Sparkler was, understandably, not happy.

“Athena should have come down by now,” Cullen walked over to the ladder.

“Do I want to know why she went up there?” Considering what Dorian had walked in on, he had trepidation lacing his voice.

“She… Forgot something,” Cullen slightly blushed as he climbed the ladder to find a sleeping Athena laying on the bed with her brunette hair covering her face. He chuckled softly as he walked over to her and pulled Duchess’ hair out of her face. He bent down to kiss her forehead, and placed his hand on her expanding belly, smiling as he felt the baby move. Cullen whispered, “Let your mother sleep,” carefully leaving the bedroom and climbing down the ladder.

“Well?” Dorian fingered a chess piece.

“She’s sleeping,” Cullen smiled as he sat down, “my move?”

“It wasn’t all that long ago that she didn’t sleep… Now it’s all she does,” Dorian groused, “I believe so, yes.”

“Speaking of a time when we all got little to no sleep... Athena told me of an incident that happened on the Storm Coast with one of Bull’s acquaintances?” Cullen made his move, able to concentrate fully on the game.

“You mean when she didn’t talk to us for a week afterwards?” He asked to clarify.

“That would be the one,” Cullen waited for Dorian to move.

“What did you want to know?” Dorian moved his queen, leaving the king wide open.

Cullen shook his head in disbelief, seeing it, “Why was this acquaintance beaten up when Athena went to break down her tent? And why did you refuse to let her heal him?”

“You don’t want to know… I don’t even want to repeat it,” Dorian’s voice was soft, but Cullen detected an edge of bitterness and lingering anger.

“It still bothers her that you three refuse to talk about it,” Cullen wondered if he should end the game now or wait until he got an answer out of Sparkler first.

“I’d rather the not knowing bother her than have her hurt by what that low life uttered,” Dorian paused, “Cullen, I can’t… I won’t…”

“Now you have me worried. What did he say?”

Dorian shook his head, “No.”

“You won’t tell me?” Cullen was amazed and now very worried that this may still pose a threat to Athena.

“No,” Sparkler said mulishly.

“Why?” He toyed with a chess piece.

“Because you would go to the ends of the world to hunt him down and kill him. Despite my teasing I do like you.” Dorian smirked and then grew serious, “My cousin is six months pregnant with your child. She needs you more now than during the war. During the war Athena held on to that coin you gave her like it was a talisman to ward off evil… A promise of hope that when all was said and done, she’d still have you. My answer will always be no.”

“I guess I’ll have to ask Bull or Varric,” Cullen sighed. He had hoped this would be easy.

“You’ll get the same answer,” Dorian responded softly. (The answer will always be no. I walked up on the tail end of the beating. When they informed of what that elf wanted to do, I wished I hadn’t packed Bianca away.)

“If it was so bad that years later you three refuse to talk about it, Why isn’t he dead?” Curly was very irritated that he was being stonewalled.

“Because Athena came back,” Dorian said bitterly, “if it had taken her an extra three minutes, he’d be dead.”

“That would have went over well,” Cullen was sarcastic. He knew Duchess would have been furious with us.

Dorian smiled sadly. He knew Cullen was right, but it didn’t change what he thought. So, he changed the subject, “The game is yours, Commander. I think I’m going to go see what my love is up to for lunch.” And with that he stood and left, grumbling, “Locks would go a long way in keeping people out.”

Cullen shook his head and called after him, “So would knocking before entering.” Dorian waved him off.

After Cullen put away the chess board and pieces he went up to check on Duchess. He had taken off the day to spend with her, between the Marquis and now that she was sleeping, his plans fell apart. 

Her hair had fallen in her face again and he gently moved it so she could breathe. He noticed that the pillow she used to support her belly had fallen to the floor so he picked it up and slowly put it back under her. Curly then moved to his side of the bed and picked up a book that he had been reading. Placing a gentle hand on his wife’s belly he read until lunchtime. 

Cullen heard the servants banging around downstairs and growled softly. Athena groaned as she stretched and rolled to her back before opening her eyes. Cullen smiled down at her when her violet eyes finally opened, “It’s lunchtime.”

Athena closed her eyes and shivered. Her entire body ached and she was very cold. Duchess whispered, “I guess I should get up.”

Cullen closed his book and got out of bed. Athena, wobbled when she sat up, of course her husband noticed, “Athena?”

“I’m still tired, and I’m cold,” Athena whispered and then stood, teetered, and almost fell back on the bed. 

Cullen caught her, “Apparently your balance is off still.” 

Athena nodded and held on to him, feeling as though everything was spinning. 

He asked, “Do you want me to bring lunch up here so you can rest?”

“No, I can make it downstairs,” She rasped out.

“Are you sure?” Cullen was concerned at how suddenly Athena became ill. She seemed mostly fine this morning. 

Duchess nodded, “I need to use the garderobe anyway.”

Cullen released her slowly and they walked over to the ladder. Cullen went down first without any complaints from Athena, which was quite unusual as she always teased him. Cullen stood right under the ladder in case Athena needed him, which she did. Athena lost her grip and fell, thankfully her husband caught her, “After lunch you’re seeing a healer.”

“I lost my grip, Cullen, that’s all,” She hoarsely argued as he reluctantly put her down.

“Then why can’t you talk above a whisper?” He challenged her.

“Because my throat hurts,” Athena walked slowly to the door, swaying unsteadily as she did so. Her husband walked with her, “I’m just going to the garderobe.”

“I’m just going to talk to Josephine and Leliana. I also want to see if Alistair’s messengers arrived.” Cullen wisely kept the following thought to himself, and because you can’t walk straight.

Athena sighed, hating how weak and achy she felt. Cullen put an arm around her and they walked to the atrium. Once Athena was in the garderobe, Curly came into the main hall and motioned to Ruffles. When she came over he asked, “Have Alistair’s messengers arrived?”

“Not that I know of… You look worried,” Josephine was concerned, the only time she saw Curly look that concerned was when Duchess went off to fight Corypheus.

“Athena isn’t herself.”

Before he could continue, one of the royals’ servants approached them, “Commander, the King and Queen thank you and the Inquisitor for your hospitality and the use of your quarters during this time. They wish to inform you that your quarters are now vacant.” With that the servant left.

“Thank the Maker,” Cullen breathed a sigh of relief and turned his attention back to Ruffles, “Can you have Ellendra or Caerwin meet us in our permanent quarters in an hour?”

“Certainly. What’s wrong?” Josephine asked.

“Athena’s ill, and I’d rather make certain that it’s nothing…” Cullen trailed off, pushing away his dark thoughts, for fear that they would be true. “I have to get back to her.”

“Understood,” Ruffles said as Cullen went back into the atrium to find Athena sitting on the floor and shivering with her arm wrapped around her middle.

Hunkering down beside her he gently touched her, “Can you stand?” Athena shook her head.

Cullen picked her up and carried her in and through the main hall. Ruffles looked at me and we both ran for a healer. Athena looked briefly up from her husband’s shoulder and whispered, “Where are we going?”

“To our quarters. Alistair and Selene have vacated them,” Cullen carried her up the stairs. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m cold, everything aches and spins, and I’m feeling nauseous ,” Athena whispered.

Cullen laid her on the bed. Athena moved to take off her shoes, Cullen shook his head at her and removed them for her. After she was covered in blankets he got her some water. Sitting beside her Curly gave Duchess the glass and she drank it as though she was dying of thirst. Once the glass was empty he filled it again.

Ellendra and Caerwin came in. Ellendra spoke first, “Commander?”

Giving Athena the glass of water Cullen walked over to talk to Ellendra and Caerwin, “She got ill last night but said it was because she got nervous talking to the Marquis. She seemed fine this morning until she took a nap. She woke up not being able to talk, tired, cold, and off balance. Coming up here she said everything ached, spun, and felt nauseous.”

“She hasn’t complained of anything with the baby?” Caerwin inquired.

“Not specifically,” he guessed. When the miscarriage happened she didn’t complain of anything with the baby then. 

“That’s a good thing, Commander. At this stage she would be feeling pain instead of achiness,” Caerwin reassured him and walked over to Athena to check on her.

“How ill did she get last night?” Ellendra asked.

“It was similar to when she had the morning sickness. No appetite, vomiting…” Cullen paced.

“I heard that the Marquis grabbed her shoulders and shook her?” Ellendra questioned.

“Yes,” Cullen growled.

“Was he wearing gloves?”

“I had been pulled away before she was attacked. I didn’t notice gloves,” Cullen rubbed his neck and sighed, “We thought that he had just bruised her.”

“It could be that,” Ellendra tried to reassure him, but couldn’t hide the doubt in her voice.

“What are you thinking?” Cullen’s voice had an anxious note to it.

“A very weak poison,” Ellendra said softly.

“Maker’s breath!” He swore, “I’m going to kill him.”

Caerwin came back to them, “The baby is fine, and doesn’t look to be going anywhere. The Inquisitor, however, is asleep…” Cullen breathed a sigh of relief. Caerwin continued, “And looks to only be worsening.”

“I have to be able to see her bruises…We’re going to have to wake her to get that dress off of her,” Ellendra informed them. 

Cullen walked over to Athena before Ellendra finished speaking and ripped Duchess’ dress in twain (the destruction of our heroine’s clothing continues.) “Or we could destroy the dress,” she quipped.

Looking at Athena’s neck and shoulders, which had turned a weird yellowish color Ellendra murmured, “Definitely poison.” And then louder, “On the bright side she’s already fighting it off and it wasn’t enough to harm her or the babe except to make her ill for a day or two. I’m going to put a poultice on her bruises to draw the poison out faster, but at this point, it won’t take long until she’s feeling better.”

“Is there anything she needs to do?” Cullen’s worry for his wife overriding the desire to kill.

“Rest as much as possible and drink plenty of water. She doesn’t need to be restricted too much as the poison is already leaving her,” Ellendra readied and applied the poultice.

“Thank you. When you leave can you have someone send Morrigan here?” Cullen requested.

“Certainly,” Caerwin left.

Ellendra was slower to leave, seeing Curly’s face pinched and the worry in his eyes that was quickly turning to guilt. Ellendra touched his arm and assured him, “She’s going to be fine. The baby is going to be fine. We’ll check on her in the morning.”

“Thank you,” Cullen said hoarsely as Ellendra left. Of course Ellendra’s words had no effect on his guilt as he started thinking that he should have been there to defend Athena when the Marquis confronted her. Once again, Cullen felt as though he had failed in protecting her. Sitting beside his wife, he pulled her hair out of her face as tears stung his eyes. 

He was so lost in thought that he didn’t hear Morrigan enter. Morrigan’s voice was soft, “Cullen?”

“She was poisoned by the Marquis,” he almost whispered.

“Ellendra informed me,” Morrigan walked over to Athena to inspect Ellendra’s handiwork.“‘Tis a decent poultice. Make certain she has plenty of water. Was there something you wanted to do?”

“Yes… There was.... Will you…” Cullen trailed off, standing but unable to take his eyes from his wife.

“No harm will come to her,” Morrigan said softly. She saw how desperately Curly wanted to stay with Duchess, “You need not leave.”

“No, I need to inform Josephine and Leliana. I also need to let Darius know to take over for me… And the Marquis…” Cullen growled the last.

“I will stay until your return. Go, do what you need to do.” After the door closed behind Curly, Morrigan remarked to the air, “The Marquis does not have long to live.”

**

Cullen ran down the stairs and into the main hall. He went in to Josephine’s office first and seeing Ruffles as well as Leliana he said, “Good, you’re both here.”

“How is Athena?” Josephine asked with great concern.

“She was poisoned,” Cullen stated bluntly as he paced, anxious to get his tasks done so he could get back to his wife. The ladies gasped and he continued, “Ellendra says that she is going to be all right in a couple days and that the baby is fine. Has the Marquis left?”

“He plans to leave on the morrow,” Josephine responded.

“Stop him. I want him thrown in the dungeon,” Cullen ordered. Leliana left immediately, knowing if Cullen saw the Marquis, that he wouldn’t live to see the sun set.

Josephine looked at Cullen and said softly, “You cannot blame yourself for this.”

“She’s the Inquisitor, Josephine…” he paused and said hoarsely, “More than that, she’s my wife and she was poisoned in the main hall, surrounded by people. I left her for five minutes, thinking that no harm would come to her here.”

“You cannot see or know all, Commander. If Leliana had any idea that this was the Marquis’ intent, do you think that he would have been allowed in?” Josephine asked.

“It still happened in the most used section of Skyhold and nothing was done!” Cullen yelled and instantly regretted it seeing Ruffles jump, “I am sorry. I shouldn’t be taking my anger out on you.”

“And you shouldn’t be blaming yourself,” Josephine reiterated.

“I need to talk to Darius and find out why the Marquis would poison the Inquisitor,” Cullen left. He found Darius in the sparring ring. Darius looked up as he heard the soldiers murmuring, “Commander.”

“This doesn’t look good,” Darius murmured as he let go of his opponent to talk to Curly.

They walked away from the soldiers and spoke in hushed tones. Cullen was the first to speak, “Athena’s been poisoned. I need you to take over command until she’s better.”

“Maker! Will she be all right? Will the baby?” Darius’ voice was full of concern.

“The baby is fine and Ellendra said Athena would be fine in a few days,” Cullen told him.

“Do you know who did it?” Darius looked around to make sure no one else was listening to them.

“The Marquis.”

Darius shook his head, “That would explain why I saw him going in to the dungeon.”

“Good. I don’t have to hunt him down,” Cullen smile was grim and full of unhappy things for the noble fop. 

“Why don’t you let Leliana handle the interrogation and go take care of your wife?” Darius suggested, thinking that was the safer option for all involved. He also knew that it was completely hopeless to try.

“I am, he’ll never harm her again,” Cullen headed to the dungeon. Darius shook his head, knowing he would do the same.

Cullen walked swiftly down the darkened stairs to the cells. He marched past Alistair, Leliana, and Bull, grabbed the Marquis by the throat and lifted him against the far wall, growling, “You will tell the King and Nightingale what they want to know or you die now.”

“Can’t breathe!” The Marquis gasped out, clawing at Cullen’s hand.

“Why did you poison the Inquisitor?!” Cullen shouted, their faces a mere breath apart.

“To stop the Inquisition from interfering,” The Marquis gasped out as Cullen had yet to relax his hold.

“In what?” Leliana touched Cullen’s shoulder to get his attention. She shook her head, knowing this would be the last thing Athena wanted. Cullen slightly loosened his grip.

“The queen wants her throne back,” the Marquis snarled.

“The queen is upstairs with our children,” Alistair was confused.

“She is not the true queen. The true queen is the one you left at the altar for “love”,” the fop sneered.

“Anora refused to provide an heir,” Alistair growled.

“So you poison the Inquisitor to prevent us from getting involved in your civil war?” Cullen couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Yes! Per the Queen’s orders!” The Marquis shouted and Cullen tightened his hand around the Marquis throat.

“What’s the plan then? Take control of Honnleath and attack from there?” Bull guessed. He also noted that the noble fop couldn’t breathe, but he wasn’t about to tell Cullen to stop. The Marquis nodded, his face quickly turning red. 

“Commander, we still need him breathing,” Leliana was the voice of reason.

Cullen looked away from his potential victim and stared hard at Nightingale. He slowly released the Marquis’ neck. Clenching his other hand in to a fist, with lightning quickness, punched the Marquis in the stomach. The Marquis “oofed” and doubled over. Cullen menaced, “Once Nightingale is done with you, you die.” Curly looked at Leliana, “He’s breathing… For now,” and then he left.

**

Morrigan checked on Duchess as Sparkler came up the stairs to visit. Morrigan asked him, “Mayhap you can answer something for me. Why did Athena’s father and mother lie to her?”

“Does it matter? They’re both gone now,” Dorian responded with sadness tinging his velvet (his words, not mine) voice.

“I am curious as to why they would send away their child, only to have her brought back to them years later, and then not tell her the truth,” Morrigan explained what she was thinking.

Dorian sighed, “They thought they were protecting her. They knew her life would be awful growing up in a circle, daughter to the First Enchanter and Knight-Commander, everyone would hate her. If they had known what Bernard was doing…”

Athena rolled over to her side and murmured for her husband. Dorian and Morrigan chuckled hearing her. Morrigan said softly, “She will not be pleased to hear that the Marquis died at the Commander’s hands.”

“She’ll eventually get over it. And her husband will sleep easier knowing that at least one threat against Athena was eliminated,” Sparkler defended Curly.

“I see the loyalty and devotion between Cullen and Athena… And the sickening, constant nonsense between Alistair and Selene,” Morrigan changed the subject to happier things as they walked out on to the balcony so they could talk without disturbing Athena, “You are in love, are you not?”

“I am,” Dorian found it odd that the taciturn lady was showing a vulnerable side to him.

“With the Commander’s second?”

“Yes, why do you ask?” Sparkler was getting suspicious.

“I have never been in love… And I find 'tis a curious thing,” Morrigan tried to keep from blushing.

Dorian saw the pink steal into her cheeks thanks to a full moon and he gasped, “You like someone?! Who?”

“I have not told Athena about this yet, I will most certainly not tell you!” Morrigan’s blush grew. 

Sparkler laughed and they both jumped in surprise as they heard Athena groan.

Athena woke up shortly after Morrigan and Dorian went out on to the balcony. Overhearing the conversation between them, she laid as still as possible. Smiling, she silently cheered Morrigan on to keep talking. Until she had to use the garderobe and tried to get up... Everything hurt and she groaned.

“Don’t you dare move,” Dorian warned as he and Morrigan ran to her side.

“As much as I would love to lay still, my body doesn’t agree,” Athena rasped out and crossed her legs.

Morrigan chuckled, “Let me help you to the water closet.” 

Gently helping Athena to a sitting position Morrigan sat beside her to put Athena’s arm around her neck. Athena winced, Morrigan apologized, “I am sorry, my friend, but I am not strong enough to carry you and I doubt you want your cousin in there with you.”

Athena shook her head. Morrigan slowly stood, guiding Duchess along with her. The walk was torturously slow as Athena could only move at a snail’s pace.

“I heard what was said between you and my cousin,” Athena whispered.

“The Inquisitor should not be eavesdropping on private conversations,” Morrigan softly chided.

“The Inquisitor woke to a poison pulling poultice around her neck, her husband gone, and voices coming from the balcony. What else was I to do?” Athena quipped in a whisper.

“You have… Valid points,” Morrigan blushed as she opened the water closet door for Athena.

Once Athena was settled on the toilet, she whispered, “You can wait outside if you like.”

Raising an eyebrow at her friend Morrigan remarked, “Absolutely not, you are too weak and unstable to be left alone. If you wish, I will turn my back. How could you tell it was a poison pulling poultice?”

Athena shrugged to Morrigan’s offer of turning her back and answered her question, “Because they always smell disgusting. I’m quite surprised I’m not getting ill from it.” 

Morrigan shrugged a shoulder, at a loss. Athena continued whispering, “Who is it?”

“You should be more concerned with getting well instead of worrying about my love life or lack there of.” Morrigan changed the subject as it was making her uncomfortable, “No questions as to why you have that thing surrounding your neck?”

“I assume that I was poisoned. Morrigan, I’m not going to let this go… Tell me!” Athena rasped out, not willing to let her friend change the subject. 

“That you were.” Morrigan sighed in aggravation, “’Tis one of your husband’s soldiers and ‘tis just a mild infatuation!”

“Name?” Athena tried and failed to stand. 

“Johan,” Just as gently as before, Morrigan assisted her in getting up and out of the water closet. When the door opened they saw Curly...

Athena wanted so much to smooth the worry lines away that were currently inhabiting Cullen’s forehead and around his eyes. She smiled at him and whispered, “Corypheus couldn’t beat me, a little poison isn’t going to stop me.”

Cullen closed his brown eyes against the sting of tears. When he opened them he took a step to be closer to his wife and stuttered, “Athena, I-You-,” he paused, realizing what she said, “How did you know that you were poisoned?”

“Can we sit down first?” Athena rasped out, wilting quickly.

“Oh, of course,” Cullen reached down to pick her up and carried her to their bed.

Dorian smiled watching them, “Since my cousin is now in the care of her over protective husband, I think I shall find my own love.” Morrigan left with him. 

After getting Duchess settled in bed, Cullen got her a glass of water. Athena took it gratefully and started drinking, while he drank in her. When she was finished he took the glass and sat it on the night stand beside the bed. Athena felt the baby move and placed Cullen’s hand on her belly. He smiled as tears sprang to his eyes. Athena started to whisper, “Cullen, I…”

“Shhh,” he put a gentle finger to her lips, “you don’t have to say a word. Ellendra says you’ll be fine in a few days. She also said that you should drink plenty of water and rest as much as possible. Caerwin said that the baby is fine.”

Athena kissed his finger and pulled it away from her mouth, she whispered, “Get quill and paper, please?”

Cullen did as she asked, but he was very confused. She should be resting, not writing letters. When he brought it to her, Athena took it from him and wrote: I love you. I knew it was poison because of the poultice around my neck. Who poisoned me?

Cullen laughed softly, “I love you, too. It was Marquis Rakona.” 

Duchess wrote: Why? 

Curly answered, “He claimed that Anora ordered it and it was because she didn’t want you to interfere in her trying to wrest the crown from Alistair.” 

Athena thought for several minutes, tapping the quill to her lips, wondering how to ask if the Marquis still lived. Cullen sat down beside her and watched her… He thought that even as ill as she was, his wife was still a vision of loveliness. “If you’re thinking of asking if the Marquis still lives… He does, for now.” Cullen warned. Which prompted her written response of ‘thank you.’

He watched Athena write… And write… And write some more. Curly wasn’t sure if he should be worried or happy that she has so much to say/write. When she finished she handed the paper to him and reached for her glass of water. 

Cullen chuckled as he read. When he finished reading he looked deep into her violet eyes and asked, “Morrigan and Johan?” 

Athena nodded, emptying her glass. This time Cullen brought the water pitcher to her and filled her glass. Athena looked at him, confused. He sat the water pitcher on the night stand, “I want you within arm’s reach right now.” 

Athena put her half empty glass of water down and watched the storm brewing in Cullen’s eyes for several minutes. She finally wrote: do not blame yourself.

When Cullen read what she wrote he shook his head and choked out, “How can I not? He waited for me to leave before he attacked you. I should have stayed. I should have questioned him further when he barged in to my office. Better yet, I should have thrown him out. I should have…” Cullen paused as he fought back tears and caressed her cheek, “I will not allow this to happen again.”

Athena opened her mouth to speak and thought better of it. Instead, she wrote: There was no way to know that he was going to touch me or use poison… Has anyone gone through his things?

“I don’t know, but right now, I just want to be with you.” He took hold of her hand as she yawned. When she finished yawning she looked at Cullen with bleary eyes. Smiling, he whispered, “Rest.”

“Hold me?” She whispered. Curly couldn’t do anything but oblige, so he laid down beside her and she snuggled in to him. It took Athena mere minutes to fall asleep in the protection and safety of her husband’s arms. Unfortunately, all he could think of was how close she came to death within a roomful of people and he had left for less than five minutes. It ate at him like a festering wound.

**

Before breakfast Leliana came to talk to our lovers. Only one of them was awake. Cullen heard her soft knock and gently released his sleeping wife to answer the door. Silently they walked out on to the balcony so they could talk without disturbing Athena and still be able to keep an eye on her. Leliana asked, “How is she?”

“Weak… with all that she’s been through I’ve never seen her this weak. Maybe it’s because she can’t talk above a whisper right now but you would think fighting Corypheus, or saving Selene, or when our first baby was lost would douse the fire in her, but they didn’t. Ellendra said it was a weak poison that was used and that the poison was already leaving her…” Cullen couldn’t help but think there was more to Athena being ill than a weak poison.

“We went through the Marquis’ room. It was indeed a weak poison. They’re making an antidote for it,” Leliana quietly informed him.

“Are you saying this was something that didn’t make Athena sick?” Cullen questioned.

“She’s with child, it may have a different affect on her because of that. Or she could just be ill,” Leliana paused, “I understand if you blame me for Athena being poisoned.”

Cullen smirked bitterly, “I should have sent him packing the second he walked in to my office. I should have stayed with Athena at dinner. I should have noticed that something was off about him, but I didn’t. I dismissed him as another of the fop nobility that wouldn’t dare take on the Inquisitor. Since the war ended I thought we could relax a little. I think she’s in more danger now than when she was facing down Corypheus. At least all he wanted to do was kill her.”

“Then we become more vigilant about who is near her,” Leliana tried to assure him.

“You mean what we should have been doing all along?” Cullen asked bitterly.

Leliana looked quickly at the mountains, “I may not be in love with her, but I do consider Athena a friend. I would do anything to protect her.” Pausing she looked at Cullen to change the subject, “Only one of Alistair’s agents made it to Skyhold today.”

“What about the others?”

“Missing or dead. Anora is making a play for the throne,” Leliana answered.

“And our scouts?” Cullen and Nightingale walked back in from the balcony as Athena started to stir.

“Cullen?” Athena croaked out.

“I’m right here, my love.” Cullen walked over to her.

“I don’t think the poultice is working,” Athena whispered.

“Why would you think that?” He sat beside her.

“I feel worse,” she rasped.

“Get Ellendra.” Cullen stated to Nightingale who was already heading for the door. Cullen caressed Athena’s hair. Athena shivered and Cullen immediately stopped, “Your hair hurts?”

“No, I’m cold again and my head is pounding,” Athena whispered, “will you take me to the garderobe?”

“Of course,” he gently picked her up and carried her. When they came out Ellendra and Leliana were waiting for them. After Cullen laid Athena back down in bed and covered her he motioned to Ellendra to come forward. Athena took hold of his hand, not wanting to be left alone. Cullen raised her hand to his lips and kissed it, whispering, “I’m not going anywhere.”

Ellendra checked the poultice and removed it, “It drew the rest of the poison out. You should be feeling better. In fact, as weak as the poison was it shouldn’t have affected you at all beyond initially being dosed with it. I’m thinking that this illness is unrelated to the poison, or was made worse by it. The reason you feel so cold is because you have a fever. The weakness and soreness is from that as well.”

“What about the headache?” Athena rasped out.

“That could be part of the fever… Have you eaten anything?” Ellendra asked.

“Not since yesterday’s breakfast,” Athena whispered.

“And you aren’t hungry?” She was surprised.

“I’ve been feeling queasy since my confrontation with the Marquis,” Duchess cleared her throat, trying to talk louder.

Ellendra responded softly, “Try to eat something."

“Any suggestions?”

“Something light,” Ellendra smiled and then took her leave.

Leliana left as Cullen waited for Duchess to tell him what she wanted to eat. When she didn’t say what she wanted, he gave her a glass of water, “What would you like to eat?”

“Nothing,” Athena made a face and took a sip of water.

“Athena…” Cullen’s tone softened when he saw tears in her eyes, “It can be as small as a single bite of a chocolate chip cookie, I just want you to try.”

Athena nodded and ate half of the cookie Curly brought her before she needed to lay down again.


	49. Chapter 49

It took about a week of almost constant sleep for Athena to be on the mend. Cullen rarely left her side. The rest of us would stop in to see how she was doing, ask if he needed a break (Curly’s response was always no. As much as I badgered him for it, I couldn’t blame him,) and I would tell stories when I visited until Duchess fell asleep, which took all of five minutes.

Once she started to feel better there was a meeting between, her, her advisors, and the royals. Leliana started, “My agents are reporting that Anora is about a week away from taking over Honnleath.”

“Would we be able to reach them in time?” Athena asked.

“You aren’t going anywhere,” Cullen ordered emphatically.

Athena raised an eyebrow at him, thinking, that’s not what I meant, “How soon can forces reach Honnleath?”

“The Fereldan army should reach them in two days,” Alistair told them.

“The King has informed us that he will be leaving on the morrow,” Josephine said quietly.

“You’re going back to Denerim?” Athena was confused.

“The Queen will be, under heavy guard. I will be going to Honnleath,” Alistair answered.

“With who?” Cullen asked, having the news about the king dropped on him as well. 

“A few old friends will be joining me about a half day’s ride from Skyhold,” Alistair remarked.

“I still don’t like this plan, Alistair,” Selene did not make an attempt to hide her frustration.

“You and the children will be protected,” Alistair responded.

“It’s not me and the children I’m worried about.”

“You want to ride out of Skyhold without a guard, Alistair?” Leliana was thinking her friend had lost it.

“I won’t put the Inquisitor at risk again, but I refuse to sit on my throne in Denerim while Anora attacks my people,” Alistair started to pace.

“This is madness. You are the King of Fereldan, you cannot ride out of Skyhold without a guard. I won’t allow it,” Cullen interjected with irritation lacing his voice.

“Who is taking the Queen and the children back to Denerim?” Athena looked around the room.

“Everyone we came with, Inquisitor,” Selene answered.

“Darius and several of our soldiers will be marching with them,” Cullen revealed.

“The Commander is right, Your Majesty, you cannot leave Skyhold without having someone with you,” Athena responded softly as she placed her hand on her belly. Cullen noticed and raised an eyebrow at her. She smiled to let him know that all was well, “Why can’t your friends meet you here?”

“Because it would take longer,” Alistair mumbled, he was lying to protect them, but it seemed to be backfiring.

“How? I could have my agents lead them here,” Leliana offered.

“Because we’re not sure where they are,” Selene said quietly.

“Do you have a death wish?” Cullen asked the king, incredulous.

“Commander, how many soldiers do we have at our disposal right now?” Athena was dreading the answer to her question.

“Enough for Skyhold to be well protected, to go with the Queen, and guard the King without needing to call anyone back,” Cullen was none too pleased, the last thing he wanted to do was ride in to battle with Duchess not at full health.

Athena knew that was going to be the answer and closed her eyes, “Then let’s make sure he gets to Honnleath alive, shall we?”

“With Darius going with the Queen…” Cullen said softly, taking her hand in his. 

“I know,” Athena opened her violet eyes to stare in to his brown ones.

“Absolutely not!” Alistair exclaimed.

“Then I take Inquisition forces to Honnleath without the King of Fereldan,” Cullen paused and said softly, “I spent most of my childhood near Honnleath. I want to defend it.”

“You would leave your pregnant wife for an undetermined amount of time to defend a place you once called home?” Alistair couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“There are people depending on their king to defend them. If he gets killed because he left Skyhold without a guard, what are those people going to do?” Cullen argued.

“I won’t let you miss out on this special time,” Alistair countered.

“Which friends are you to meet with, Alistair?” Leliana found it odd that the king was fighting so hard against this.

“Ogrhen and Zevran,” he answered.

“Why not have the Inquisition forces ride along until you meet with these friends, and then they can turn back?” Josephine suggested.

“It’s a thought,” Selene was grateful to the others for encouraging her husband to take someone with him.

“What if the Fereldan army needs reinforcements?” Cullen wanted to make certain every possibility was planned for.

“Then we will send word,” Alistair told him.

“Are we agreed then? The Commander and the Inquisition forces will ride along with the king until either they reach Honnleath or the King’s friends, which ever happens first?” Athena was eager to get out of the war room to spend some time with her husband.

“I don’t have a choice do I?” Alistair asked quietly.

“Not in this, Alistair,” his wife placed a hand on his shoulder.

“There is the matter of the Marquis to discuss,” Leliana said since that subject was concluded.

“Kill him,” Cullen returned softly, so softly that it appeared that only Athena heard him since she shook her head at him.

“He’s Orlesian, wouldn’t the Empress want a say in this?” Athena inquired.

“Empress Celene has stated that since the attacks were on the Inquisitor and the royal couple of Fereldan, she feels that you should deal with the Marquis,” Josephine explained.

“I think he deserves to die for what he did to you, Inquisitor,” Alistair made his opinion known.

“More blood on my hands,” Athena said under her breath and sighed. “What ever knowledge we could gain from him has been gained?”

“It has, Inquisitor,” Leliana answered.

“I would really rather not see him again,” Athena murmured as she looked down at her and Curly’s entwined fingers.

“You won’t be alone. I’ll pull every soldier in to the main hall if that would make you feel safer,” Cullen assured her.

“If you did that he would die before I judged him,” Athena looked up at her husband.

“That can be arranged as well,” Nightingale interjected causing Ruffles to gasp.

“No, that wouldn’t be right,” Athena argued.

“You’ve made your decision then?” Ruffles asked.

“There’s only one decision to make,” she responded, saddened that she had to end another life.

“Then let’s get this over with,” Leliana said as they all filed out of the war room.

Cullen and Athena were the last to leave. He pulled her against him as tight as he dared and kissed her passionately. When the kiss ended Athena gasped a little. Cullen was immediately worried, “Did I hurt you?”

Athena took one of his hands and placed it where the baby was still kicking, “I wasn’t expecting the baby’s kick to be so strong.”

Cullen closed his eyes against the sting of tears and kissed her again, never moving his hand from where Duchess had placed it, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Athena put her arm around his neck and kissing him, whispered, “let’s spend the day together.”

“After you deal with the Marquis, I need to talk to Bull and those I’m taking with me, and then I am yours,” Cullen finished with a chuckle as the baby was still kicking.

“Then we shall see to the Marquis,” Athena pulled back from her husband. Cullen smiled down at her and took her hand as they left the war room. 

They entered the main hall to silence, almost everyone had their weapons drawn and pointed at the Marquis. Athena groaned, “What did he do now?”

“He said that Anora would keep going after you,” Ruffles quietly informed her as Athena took her seat.

“Would she now?” Athena raised an eyebrow, “Why would she want to do that?”

“Because you’re interfering in her plans of taking back the throne,” the Marquis answered.

“If she had wanted me to stay out of her fight, she probably shouldn’t have sent someone to poison me,” Athena responded calmly. Hearing the scraping of Cullen’s sword being pulled out of its scabbard and his growl, she knew that she had to end this quickly, “Do you have anything else to say Marquis?”

“You won’t win. Anora is the rightful queen!” The Marquis yelled.

“Execute him,” Athena quietly ordered.

“Yes, Inquisitor,” Josephine said as the Marquis was lead away.

Athena didn’t rise immediately which had Ruffles and Curly worried. Lost in thought she didn’t see them approach her and she gasped when Cullen placed his hand on her shoulder asking quietly, “Are you all right?”

“It’s not a discussion for here. While you’re going about your business, I think I’ll talk to Varric,” Athena slowly stood.

“Then I will leave you in his care,” Curly smiled gently at her as he took her hand and walked over to me.

“Well, Duchess, how would you feel about a game of Wicked Grace?” I saw the haunted look in her violet eyes. A look she would get every time she had to kill someone during the war.

“I would love one,” Athena smiled at me… A smile that could melt the coldest heart.

Curly, of course, took her attention away from me by kissing her, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Are you distracting him from work again?” I teased as he walked to the door.

“I try my best,” Athena smirked.

I laughed hearing Curly mutter, “Maker’s breath!” I imagined he was blushing as I pulled out the cards and Duchess, Ruffles, and I started playing.

Half way through the game I caught Athena very distracted, “Duchess, what are you doing?! You know how to play better than this!”

“What?” Athena looked at the card she had played, blushing she said, “Sorry.”

“If you’re not careful, you’re going to end up like your husband,” Sparkler remarked, joining us.

Athena chuckled, “I doubt that there are very many people that want to see me in my small clothes right now.”

“And what, pray tell, is that supposed to mean?” Ruffles raised an eyebrow at her.

Athena rubbed her growing belly to make her point. Secretly, she was still aggravated by how weak she was still feeling, “I’m not exactly at peak physical condition.”

“Duchess, you will stop this, right now,” I warned her.

“I doubt your husband minds, m’dear,” Sparkler spoke.

“Especially since they were kissing in the war room,” Ruffles smirked.

“Thank you so much, Josie,” Duchess blushed and turned her attention to her cousin, “What are you doing here?”

“I came to check on my cousin,” Sparkler said.

“Why?”

“Because the Commander cancelled our chess game today,” he answered.

“He’s leaving on the morrow,” Athena’s voice was tinged with sadness.

“To do what?” Dorian asked.

“To make sure the King arrives in Honnleath.”

“Doesn’t the King have people to do that?” I questioned.

“They are taking the Queen back to Denerim.”

“Along with Darius and several other soldiers,” Dorian moaned.

“Go along if you want,” Athena encouraged her cousin.

“Who would take care of Ana?”

“You really have to ask that question?” Duchess sounded hurt.

“Athena, you are just getting over being ill, among other things… You deserve to have some time to rest,” Sparkler explained

“Great… Here come the kid gloves again,” Athena griped.

“I enjoy taking care of Ana. Plus, without your husband Darius isn’t any fun on the road,” Dorian complained.

“Sounds like there is a story there,” I said as the game lay forgotten.

“Not really, it’s just that he’s much more serious without being able to goad the Commander,” Sparkler smirked.

“If Cullen isn’t there, he’s the one in charge. I also highly doubt he’s stopped dousing people with water,” Athena smiled at her cousin. 

As soon as Duchess stopped talking Darius walked in and seeing his lover, “What are you doing here?”

“Spending time with my cousin,” Dorian smiled brightly, if a bit sarcastically.

“Really? Ana says that you lost to her at chess again,” Darius smirked.

“I still wanted to check on my cousin,” Sparkler grumbled and Athena laughed. 

Our little group dispersed, leaving Athena alone with me, and I felt the need to chastise her a little, “If I wasn’t already in love with someone else, Curly would have had a great deal of competition for your affection.”

“Varric, you don’t have to do this,” Athena blushed.

“It seems as though I do.” I paused, “Athena, you are beautiful inside and out. With child, without child, you’re gorgeous. I also think Curly would kill anyone who tried to see you in your small clothes.”

“Why are my wife’s small clothes being discussed?” Curly groaned, saving Duchess by coming to stand behind her.

“I had to warn your lady wife that she could end up like you at playing Wicked Grace,” I half teased, “Get out of here, you two.” 

“Ready, my love?” Cullen asked quietly. 

Athena slowly stood and took her husband’s hand. They walked through the door to their quarters. Once inside, he asked, “Are you all right?”

Athena’s eyes filled with tears as they walked up the stairs, “I wish there had been another way with the Marquis.”

“If there had been, you would have found it,” Cullen softly assured her. 

Athena sighed, “Do you really think so?”

“It’s not that I think it, I know it. You should be glad that he lived as long as he did,” he answered.

“Cullen!” Athena was surprised that he still wanted to kill the Marquis.

“I didn’t have to have two men hold me back,” Cullen griped, hearing the chastisement in her tone.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Johan and I had to keep Morrigan from attacking him,” Cullen pulled her closer so he could put his arm around her.

“Why didn’t she just use magic?”

“That’s an excellent question, one you should ask her,” he smiled down at her.

“Who will be going with you?” Athena changed the subject. She didn’t really want to talk about anyone else today.

“Johan is going with me. Bull is in charge of the forces that will be left here,” Cullen answered as they sat down on the couch. Caressing her cheek, he said softly, “I will be back as soon as I can.”

Athena cupped his hand to her cheek, “I know… I wish I was going with you.”

“I’m glad you’re not,” Cullen said, “You’ve faced enough battles.”

“So have you,” she whispered, leaning in to kiss him.

After kissing for a while Cullen was finally allowed to respond, “We don’t even know if it will come to a battle. Maybe we’ll find Alistair’s friends a half day from here and we’ll be able to turn around and come home.”

“You would leave him to go to Honnleath with only two other people?” Athena chuckled, not believing him.

“I’m in love with you and I allowed you to traipse around southern Thedas with only three other people. Even though I like the King, I am not in love with him. Plus,” he paused to place a hand on her expanding belly, “you, the little one growing inside you, and the Inquisition are my responsibility. The King of Fereldan is only my responsibility until I can find other capable people to travel with him.”

“I still wish I could go with you,” Athena felt a shadow of foreboding steal into her that she couldn’t shake.

“Athena, you are just getting over from being poisoned and ill… Not to mention that it’s gotten around that you’re with child.”

“I’ve been with child for over six months now. I fail to see how that makes a difference,” Athena complained shifting to find a more comfortable spot.

“It makes you more of a target because people assume that you’re defenseless,” Cullen explained. He left it unsaid that with her being so ill, her reaction time had slowed considerably.

“Cullen, I said that I wish I could go with you. If I have any say in it, I will be here when you return,” Athena moved his hand to where their baby was kicking.

“Good,” Cullen kissed her, sliding his arms around her and under her, he picked Athena up and carried her to bed. Pleasantly surprised, she gasped. 

Cullen couldn’t tear his lips away from Athena so he continued to kiss her while he undressed. When it was Athena’s turn he shook his head at her to prevent her from moving. As Cullen undressed his wife, he would kiss the parts of her that he bared, and murmured how beautiful she was, how happy she made him, and how he couldn’t wait to see her holding their baby. By the time Athena was undressed she had happy tears streaming down her face (he kissed those away too,) and in an unhurried and gentle fashion, they made love.

They spent the day together at an unhurried pace, which was surprising considering Curly was leaving on the morrow. Before they fell asleep, Duchess sighed, “I wish every day could be like today.”

“When I come back, we will have to make days like this happen more often,” Curly promised.

“I would like that,” Athena murmured, half asleep.

Cullen chuckled softly, “You said that.”

**

Unfortunately, the night was not as peaceful as the day. Both of our lovers had horrible nightmares. Athena’s revolved around Cullen dying on his way to or in Honnleath. Cullen’s dreams started out in the past but brutally went to a future where both Athena and their child died before he could get back to Skyhold. 

Athena gave up on trying to sleep hours before the sun rose and laid for a while in her husband’s protective arms. Right before sunrise she had to use the garderobe and decided to not go back to laying down. Crouching, she pawed through her clothing which had been abandoned on the floor. 

Finding what she was looking for she whispered, “aha!” And pulled herself up using the bed and placed the item on her bed stand. Going over to Curly’s side of the bed she gingerly opened his night stand and pulled out the letters that were there, with the plan of sneaking them in to his bag without him being the wiser.

Cullen’s hand snaked out from under the covers and grabbed Athena’s wrist, “What are you doing?”

“Getting something out of your night stand,” Athena answered impishly.

“I can see that. Why?” He asked laying on his side to look at her.

“You’re supposed to still be sleeping,” Athena griped, blushing.

“So are you,” Cullen chastised her. She smiled sadly at him, causing him to wrap an arm around her middle and pull Athena down to sit beside him, “bad dreams?”

Athena nodded looking deeply in to his brown eyes, “I truly hope this is only a half day’s ride for you.”

“From your lips to the Maker’s ears,” Cullen kissed her then, pulling her on top of him, eliciting a squeal of surprise and delight from his wife.

“We can’t,” Athena told him after her breathing normalized.

“Then we will have to pick this up where we left off,” he teased.

“Promise?” Athena asked hopefully.

“I promise,” Cullen lifted his head up for another kiss and winced a little.

Athena pulled away from him because she saw the wince, “Cullen?”

“It’s just a headache,” he wanted to reassure her.

“You never get headaches this early,” She was very worried.

“You’re not the only one who had a rough night.”

“Do you want me to try to take it away?” Duchess thought it was lyrium withdrawal rearing its ugly head again. She also tried to ignore the increasing discomfort of laying on her belly.

“Athena, it’s just a headache, I’ll be fine,” Cullen rubbed her back.

“If you’re certain…” She trailed off with uncertainty lacing her voice. And then, “You need to let me up.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s not very comfortable to lay on my stomach right now,” Athena reminded him.

“Maker’s breath! I’m sorry!” Cullen immediately released her so she could roll off of him, and once Athena had caught her breath he asked, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. It didn’t hurt, it was just uncomfortable,” Athena chuckled softly.

“Are you certain?” He asked, worried.

“Yes,” she laughed softly and teased, “Now, if you’ll go back to sleep I can go back to what I was doing.”

“Not a chance,” Curly teasingly growled.

“Please?” Athena begged as she sat up.

“If you were looking for the letters you wrote me, they’re already with my things,” He drew circles on her expanded middle trying to get the baby to kick him.

“I don’t think the baby is that coordinated yet,” Athena said and the baby promptly kicked Cullen’s finger.

“I think they heard you,” Cullen said softly as he smoothed his hand against the spot that was kicked.

Tears came unbidden to her violet eyes, “So it would seem,” closing her eyes in an attempt to stop the tears from overflowing she brokenly whispered, “Maker, I wish you didn’t have to go.”

“I promise you that I will be back and before the baby is born,” Cullen wiped away a tear that escaped down Athena’s cheek, “I always keep my promises.”

“I have something for you,” Athena reached over to her nightstand and produced a small item wrapped in a purple silk scarf.

“What’s this?” Cullen unwrapped it. Seeing that it was the coin he gave her, and that she turned it in to a necklace, he was very confused, “Athena?”

“When you come home I want it back. You are the one facing danger right now, not me,” She said softly.

“Why is it wrapped in a scarf? I thought you wanted to keep a piece of me with you?” Cullen turned the coin over. He never expected to have the coin in his possession again.

“The scarf was part of what I wore when I went to the circle, for whatever reason I kept it…” A sigh shuddered through Duchess and she whispered as she laid her hand over top of Cullen’s, which was still resting on her belly, “I have a part of you with me.” 

“I will make certain that these get back to you,” Cullen hoarsely promised, fighting a large lump that had lodged itself in his throat.

They moved slowly in getting dressed, trying to make the most of the few minutes left that they had together. Half way through dressing there was a rap on the door, “Commander? We’re ready to move out.”

“I’ll be right there,” Cullen called out, looking sadly at Athena. They hurriedly finished dressing and walked to the main gate.

When they reached it, Athena stopped, “You once told me that I wasn’t to worry about you as I didn’t need the extra distraction. I don’t want you worrying about me.”

“That is not going to happen,” Cullen cleared his throat, wondering why it felt scratchy.

“I’m not the one riding off in to potential danger this time,” Athena paused as the baby reminded her of its presence by kicking her, “We will be fine. Promise me?”

Instead of doing as Duchess asked, Cullen kissed her for a very long time. He wasn’t gong to make a promise to the one he loved that he knew he was incapable of keeping. When they broke for air he whispered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” She paused seeing how pale her husband looked, “Are you sure that this is just a headache?”

“And I’m the one that gets accused of worrying too much,” Cullen gently teased.

Athena raised an eyebrow at him, not amused. Chuckling he said, “Athena, I’m fine.” She gave him a look that said she doubted that. Shaking his head at her, Curly crouched down and said softly to Duchess’ belly, “You be good for your mom and stay in there until I get back.”

“Is that an order, Commander?” Athena smiled at her husband.

“As one of your advisors, I strongly recommend it. For him, it’s an order,” Cullen cleared his throat again.

“Him? Are you so certain the baby's a he?” She asked, amused.

Blushing, he pulled her to him and growled, “Wife,” and then seriously, “I don’t care so long as you’re both healthy.”

“Take care of yourself, please?” Athena begged.

“I will,” Cullen kissed her again and we applauded, causing the lovers to blush but they didn’t stop.

Alistair’s clearing of his throat finally broke them apart, “You can stay.”

“No, I can’t,” Cullen mounted his horse and smiled at Athena. “I’ll see you soon.”

Athena watched her husband ride off very worried for him. She grew even more concerned when she saw him shiver. Morrigan noticed as well as she walked up to stand beside Athena, “Did the Commander just shiver?”

“Yes,” She answered softly.

“It’s not lyrium withdrawal rearing it’s ugly head again is it?” Sparkler stood on the other side of her.

“No,” Athena answered plainly.

“What do you think it is, then?” Sparkler asked.

“I think he’s coming down with the illness I had,” Athena murmured. Everything in her told her that she needed to be with Cullen.

“I was under the impression that you were only poisoned. There was an illness on top of it?” Morrigan questioned.

“When I get sick, I like to make sure I’m really sick,” Athena was only half joking as she watched her husband ride away from her and into the horizon.

“Curly’s sick, Nightingale,” I said quietly as Leliana was going to talk to Duchess.

“Says who?” Leliana asked, surprised.

“A healer I know… That healer also happens to be his wife,” I joked (not really.)

Nightingale frowned and ordered, “Go after him. If he gets too ill, make sure he comes back.”

“And tell him what?” I wondered as a horse was brought for me.

“Anything,” Leliana responded, and off I went after Curly and the king.

“Where’s Varric going?” I heard Athena ask.

“He’s on a mission for me,” Nightingale answered.

“Leliana, what did you do?” Athena became alarmed.

“Varric said that the Commander was sick. I want to be certain the illness won’t cause issues,” Leliana explained.

Duchess closed her eyes tight as Leliana walked off, murmuring to herself, “Cullen’s going to kill him… then he’s going to come back and kill Leliana.”

**

I had to ride hard to catch up to the large force that Curly and the King were at the head of. Thankfully, I was able to get close enough to hear their conversation but not be noticed in the crush of people. Alistair chastised Cullen for leaving, “You are a fool. Had I known the Queen was having so many issues, we wouldn’t have left Denerim.”

“We both know how stubborn the queen can be. It takes a little over a week to reach Honnleath and I’m hoping we run in to your friends long before that,” Cullen ended with a cough.

“You are also becoming ill,” Alistair admonished.

“It’s just a headache,” Curly griped, irritated.

“A headache that can produce a cough?” Alistair prodded as he raised an eyebrow, saying that he knew better, “From your tone it appears as though I’m not the only one that noticed…”

“I’ve been through worse than a cough and a headache,” Cullen sighed as he briefly looked behind him. Only able to see the top spires of Skyhold above the horizon, “The Inquisitor noticed as well.”

“She didn’t fight you on coming?” Alistair asked, surprised.

“She knew there wasn’t another option. With Darius going with the Queen and Rylen with the Divine, there isn’t anyone else I would trust this large of a force to,” Cullen explained.

“How did you convince her to stay behind?” 

“The Inquisitor is six and a half months pregnant, just getting over being ill, and poisoned. She’s an intelligent woman and most of the time, she knows her limits. I didn’t need to convince her…” Cullen looked behind him again, seeing nothing of Skyhold now his voice softened, “It didn’t stop her from wishing she could come with us though.”

“You’re a fool,” Alistair said more to himself than Cullen as he shook his head in dismay.

We rode hard with little to no conversation for the rest of the day. Of course, it would have been too simple for the King’s friends to be a half day’s ride from Skyhold per the original plan. Stopping at dusk, Cullen slid off of his horse and held on to it to regain his balance. He murmured, “I should have let Athena heal me.”

Johan ran over to him to notify him of who would be taking watches that night. Johan also asked, “I thought the Inquisitor wasn’t coming with us?”

“She’s not. Why would you ask such a thing?!” Cullen was irritated because he was feeling worse by the minute.

“Then why is one of her friends here?” Johan asked, with complete innocence and pointed at me.

“Varric!” Curly growled as he stalked over to the supply wagon to get a tent to set up for himself.

“I can’t help it that you have people that care about you,” I griped as I followed him around. I was certain he was going to need a hand.

“Who’s idea was it for you to come along then, hm? If it was Athena’s…” He trailed off as he began fighting with the stakes for the tent.

“It wasn’t her… In fact she sounded pretty upset as I left,” I informed him.

He stopped, instantly worried that something was wrong with Athena, “Why?”

“Because my being here is Leliana’s idea,” I remarked, (If I had known then what I know now, I would have lied to Curly and sent him back to Skyhold and Duchess.)

“Go back to Skyhold,” Curly was finally able to get the stakes in the ground and started setting up the tent. I helped, not that he noticed.

“I’ll go back to Skyhold when you do,” I responded with a calm I wasn’t really feeling because Curly looked like he was ready to drop.

“I cannot believe you would leave Athena’s side to follow me,” Cullen chastised.

“You don’t get it do you? Duchess would be devastated if something happened to you. Do you really want to put her through that?” I felt bad because I knew he was ill, but… We were all a tad over protective of Duchess.

“Of course not! But I have more than a passing knowledge on how to defend myself and those around me. I have no intention of getting hurt,” Cullen went in to his tent to set up his cot. A couple minutes later I heard him cursing and he brought out the broken pieces. It took everything in me not to laugh.

“The Inquisitor also knows how to protect herself and those around her. Does it stop you from worrying about her and wanting to see her protected?”

“No, I love her,” Cullen brought out a bed roll instead of another cot.

I shook my head at him, “Leliana is trying to protect both of you by having me here. Curly, are you sure you don’t want to try another cot?”

“There aren’t anymore,” he grumbled as he brought his bag in to the tent, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I would like to get some rest.”

“Have a good night, Curly,” I went to my own tent.

After I left, Cullen groaned as he laid down on his bed roll, aching everywhere. He pulled out his wife’s old letters to him and the coin necklace to hold. As Cullen read her letters, he missed her more than he would admit to anyone, except maybe Duchess.

**

Cullen grew worse the longer we travelled. To make matters worse, he wasn’t sleeping. Alistair would start off the day by telling him to go home. Curly’s response was always the same, that he would see the king to his friends or Honnleath, which ever happened first. Alistair would shake his head and call Curly a fool.

When we finally reached Honnleath, there was already a battle going on. Cullen had pretty much lost his voice by this point and would whisper orders to Johan and he would relay the commands to the rest of the forces. Once the battle was won the king and Curly met with the Fereldan army’s commander. The King’s commander was impressed with the size and how well trained the Inquisition forces were, “If you could stay for about a week we could route the support Anora mustered and capture her.”

Cullen sighed heavily because all he wanted to do was get back to his wife. But he used the table for support, and hoarsely said, “We’ll stay.”

“That’s not necessary,” Alistair objected.

“It kind of is, Your Majesty,” the king’s commander hesitated, “we’ve taken heavy losses and if we are to have a chance at defeating Anora… We need reinforcements.”

“We’ll stay,” Cullen’s voice was barely more than a whisper as he walked away, promptly dismissing the meeting.

Cullen walked slowly back to his tent, he looked as though he was afraid that he was going to lose his balance. Once in his tent he collapsed on his bed roll thinking of Athena and wondering what she was doing, how she was doing, how the baby was doing, and wishing he could be with her. He also wished the illness that he had would leave him. Without looking at me he croaked out, “What do you want Varric?”

“We’re heading back to Skyhold in the morning?” I asked hopefully, missing an actual bed (we all got spoiled after the war ended.)

“I wish,” he sighed heavily.

“Curly, you aren’t getting any better. I’m sure Duchess is frantic with worry over you. What reason could make you want to stay here?” I sat beside him.

“The king’s forces need reinforcements. Their Commander assures me that it would only take a week to break Anora’s forces and capture her,” Cullen whispered.

I shook my head at him, “Shouldn’t you be starting to feel better by now if this is the same illness Duchess had?”

“Athena was able to sleep through most of it.”

“Did she have a choice?” I asked.

Curly chuckled softly with a half smile lighting his features, remembering how out of it Duchess was, “Not really, no.”

“Shouldn’t you talk to a healer?”

He coughed… It was not a pretty cough. It sounded as though something was dying in his chest, “And have them tell me what? If it’s the same thing that made Athena ill, Ellendra said to drink plenty of water and sleep.”

“Neither of which you’ve been doing,” I chastised.

“I’ve been drinking water. The sleeping part…” Cullen trailed off.

“Shit, Curly, you know she’s going to kill me if I bring you back to her sick,” I complained... Exaggerated. (It’s for affect, Duchess!)

“It’s not your fault that I’m ill,” Cullen countered.

“And you think that is going to matter to your wife?” I asked. What I didn’t tell him was that Athena already knew that he was sick, and if I know Duchess, she was already castigating herself for getting her husband ill.

“At least then she wouldn’t be blaming herself,” Cullen smiled, the first genuine smile I had seen from him since we started this misadventure.

I chuckled, “True. Goodnight, Curly,” and I left so he could try to get some rest.

To give our Commander credit, he did try to sleep, but his dreams were worse than even when the war was going on. He had told me that they hadn’t been this bad since the fall of the Fereldan Tower. Curly’s dreams would switch between reliving the past to where he would watch Athena and their child die, she would turn into a demon, or Duchess would give birth to a demon. (With dreams like that, I don’t think I would be able to sleep either.)

Even though Cullen felt terrible he was out on the field fighting and commanding and we were able to push back against Anora’s forces with minimal losses on our side. With the final battle Anora showed herself at the front of the charge, Alistair wanted to talk to her. The Fereldan Commander and Curly advised him against it. 

The battle was brutal and intense. Anora had lost most of her forces already and was making one, last, desperate attempt. Cullen’s leadership, sick as he was, proved to be the most effective at routing Anora’s remaining force. When Anora realized that the battle was lost she tried to flee, Curly tackled her and was rewarded with a dagger in the side. Even then he refused to let her go until several others came to make sure she didn’t escape. Rolling off of her, he groaned and held his side. Cullen gingerly got to his feet and started walking to his tent.

When I saw him walking to the tent, holding his side with a bloody hand, I ran to get a healer. Alistair saw me walking back with the healer and came over to us, “What happened?”

“All I know is that Curly is injured,” I explained. We walked to the tent silently.

When we came in we saw that Cullen was armor less and shirtless, trying to staunch the blood pouring from his side. He still had the presence of mind to ask, “Where’s Anora?”

“She is secure,” Alistair answered, “What happened to you?”

“Anora stabbed me when I tackled her. The dagger was poisoned,” Cullen was matter of fact.

“P-p-poison?” The healer stammered.

“Let me guess, you don’t have any experience in poison?” I was livid.

“I do not,” and the healer ran out of the tent.

Cullen looked at me, incredulous, “How do you keep managing to find these inept healers?”

“I grab the first one that isn’t doing anything,” I explained.

Cullen tried to chuckle, but it was cut off by a groan of searing pain. Alistair quipped, “That should be your first clue. I am not skilled with a needle and that is what is needed to stop the bleeding.”

“Next time we bring our own healers,” I complained.

“Our healers were needed at Skyhold. Find Johan, he’s had to deal with poison before,” Cullen responded. His breathing had become shallow and thready. I left to track down Johan.

“What about the wound?” Alistair helped Cullen to lay down.

“Clean it and bandage it. Johan will know what to do,” Cullen whispered, shivering and closing his eyes.

Johan and I entered the tent and he immediately set to work. Blissfully, Cullen had already passed out. When Johan finished he said, “The only way the Commander lives is if we can get a mage healer to heal him. Because of how deep the wound is, I can’t be sure if I got all of the poison out.”

“It’s a week until we can get back to Skyhold,” I informed them, because there weren’t any mage healers in the Fereldan army and we had left ours at home.

“Johan, are you able to keep it clean until you get back to Skyhold?” Alistair asked.

“Yes, Your Majesty,” Johan answered.

“Then you break camp, put the Commander in a wagon. One of you will have to ride with him and ride hard for Skyhold,” Alistair commanded.

As we left to do the King’s bidding I mumbled, “Athena’s worst nightmare come true.”


	50. Chapter 50

Athena took up Cullen’s habit of pacing, for a week after he left someone would pace with her which annoyed her even more. And then she went and talked to Leliana about it, “Why are you having people follow my every move?”

“Hello to you too, Inquisitor,” Leliana was unfazed.

“Leliana!” Athena exclaimed.

“You are just getting over being ill and poisoned. You pace on the battlements, where anyone could come running, not see you, and knock you down: Or worse, knock you off,” Leliana warned.

“And I’m not in danger of that anywhere else in Skyhold?” Athena was still irritated.

“Pacing in the courtyard or the garden isn’t going to have you fall to your death if you get knocked down,” Leliana showed her irritation and, then like a switch she turned it off, “Athena, I know your worried, even though Cullen is sick, he is managing. Do you think if I thought otherwise that I would be here?”

“No,” Athena said mulishly and then sighed, “I will never tease Cullen about pacing when I’m not here again.”

Leliana chuckled, “It’s not easy is it?”

“No, it is not. But at least I never left when I was ill,” Athena griped, trying to find anything to distract her from her worry.

“He didn’t have a choice,” Leliana reminded her gently.

“I know,” she rubbed her belly absent mindedly, “I could always count on Varric to distract me… Dorian is busy with Ana. Bull is busy with Josephine and seeing to Skyhold’s defenses. Josie is busy planning her wedding. Morrigan is busy with Kieran,” she sighed, “I’m sorry if I’m annoying you.”

“You are not being annoying. You aren’t here every couple hours demanding information on your husband. Why are you so worried?” Leliana asked her friend.

“I keep having a recurring nightmare where Cullen dies… He’s always just far enough out of my reach where I can’t heal him,” Athena said quietly as they sat down.

“Does he know about them?”

“He knows I’ve had them but… They’ve only gotten worse since he left,” She looked down at her protruding belly and fought tears.

“Have you tried writing to him?” Leliana suggested.

“I have.”

“I can have them sent on to him, if you would like,” Leliana offered.

“I don’t know if that would help… I’ve voiced a lot of my worries in them,” Athena blushed.

“Up to you, my friend,” Leliana smiled at her

Athena sighed and stood, “I should go find something productive to do.”

“Have a good day, Inquisitor,” Leliana went back to work.

Athena left and went to her quarters to find a book to read, which lasted all of thirty seconds. Putting the book down, she walked out on to the east balcony. Sighing in frustration she walked back in to the bedroom and on to the north balcony. The view of the snow capped mountains couldn’t settle her restless nature so she tried to write a letter to Cullen and Mia… She didn’t get past the first sentence in either letter. Athena stood and paced around the room, not hearing Morrigan enter.

Morrigan watched her friend pace around a bit as she leaned against the railing, “The restlessness is that bad?”

Athena jumped, startled, at hearing Morrigan speak and turned to face her, “When did you get here?”

“A couple minutes ago. Would you like to share what has you so restless?” 

“I miss him,” Athena stated, playing with the folds of her dress, needing to do something to release the anxiety that had built up in her.

“That much is evident. What it does not do is explain why you aren’t sleeping or why you are pacing Skyhold like a caged animal,” Morrigan pressed gently.

“I should be with him,” Athena’s voice was laced with guilt as she turned to take up her pacing again.

“You are with child, and barely a week has passed since you fought off a terrible illness-" Morrigan’s reasons for Duchess staying behind were interrupted.

“An illness I gave my husband,” Athena almost whispered, guilt completely over taking her.

“It sounds as though we may be getting to the reason for this restlessness,” Morrigan said quietly as she walked over to Athena. “Did you make yourself ill?”

“No,” Athena looked down, still chastising herself.

“Did you willingly pass that illness on to your husband?”

“Of course not!” She exclaimed, wondering how Morrigan could ask such a thing.

“Then you have nothing to feel guilt over do you?” Morrigan’s question was gentle but firm as she led Duchess over to the couch to sit. “What else is going on?”

Athena sighed wearily, “I can’t shake this feeling of foreboding.”

“Because of the dreams?” 

“How did you…?” Athena paused and then sighed in defeat, she knew the answer, “Leliana.”

“She’s very concerned about you,” Morrigan tried to find the words to reassure her friend, “In fact, we are all worried about you. Until you hear otherwise, you need to assume that Cullen is fine.”

“Easier said than done,” Athena said softly.

“Try,” Morrigan encouraged, “Now, come have lunch with Kieran and I.”

Athena really did try to listen to Morrigan, until she woke up in the middle of the night the day Curly was injured because of a dream. In the dream she saw him bleeding and near death. Caressing her cheek he whispered, “I love you,” and faded away. 

Knowing she wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep, Athena got up, got dressed and went to the battlements to pace. Cole met her there, “You saw it too?”

“Saw what?” Athena was terrified of what Cole would say.

“The Commander, bleeding, dying, but not dead, not yet,” Cole looked far off in to the night sky, his expression inscrutable.

“Cole, you’re scaring me,” Athena started shaking.

“I only mean to help,” Cole looked kindly at her and then he turned his quiet gaze to the stars, “he said ‘I love you,’ and then went silent.”

“Cole,” Athena begged, tears filling her violet eyes as she instinctively wrapped her arm around her middle to protect her baby, from what, she wasn’t sure of.

“He’s dying, but he’ll make it home… barely. Here, it’s possible to save him,” Cole attempted to reassure her.(I think?)

Athena closed her eyes as the tears overflowed and choked out, “Leave me, please?”

Cole did as she asked and Athena crumbled against the wall, sliding down until she was sitting, sobbing. And that was how the night watch found her an hour later. They alerted Bull to the situation; he shot out of bed and hurriedly pulled on pants. Roughly waking Josephine up by shaking her, he said, “Get a healer and Morrigan.”

“Why?” Ruffles was still dazed from sleep, “what’s wrong?”

“It’s the boss. The night watch found her sobbing on the battlements clutching her stomach,” Bull answered as he rushed out of the door.

“Maker, no,” Josephine whispered in horror, thinking that Duchess was losing another baby. She ran out in her night shift to do as Bull ordered.

As the night watch and Bull ran to where Athena was last seen, they stopped dead because the spot was empty and no evidence of anyone having been there. Bull questioned, “You’re sure she was here?”

“Positive,” the night watch responded.

“Great,” Bull sighed trying to think of where Duchess would go next when Leliana appeared beside him.

“I heard that there was a commotion?” She asked.

The night watch, shaking in his boots from terror, stammered, “Y-y-yes, Nightingale….”

Bull shook his head at the man. Leliana wasn’t that terrifying, “The Inquisitor was found sitting against the wall, sobbing, and clutching her stomach. Supposedly at this spot.”

“She’s not here anymore,” Leliana was uncertain of how much she should say, but continued, “All the same, we need to find her. I received word from Honnleath.”

Bull looked down at Leliana, with a horrible idea forming, “The Boss wouldn’t have heard this news before you, would she?”

“Unless she has a way or spies I don’t know of, no,” Leliana answered as they went down to the court yard where they met Morrigan, Dorian, Ruffles, and Ellendra. 

Bull and Leliana described the situation and asked Ellendra for her input. Ellendra assured them, “I just saw her today, there were no signs of her going in to labor. Physically the Inquisitor should be fine.”

“She can’t miscarry?” Josephine asked, the fear in her voice spoke volumes.

“She is too far along for a miscarriage. She would have to go in to labor at this point. I’m not saying that it is impossible, but highly unlikely considering there were no signs this afternoon,” Ellendra explained. Most of them breathed a sigh of relief.

“It’s a shame Varric’s not here,” Dorian supplied.

“Why would that matter? You’re her cousin and traipsed through most of Southern Thedas with her,” Leliana seemed irritated by what Sparkler said. (If she only knew.)

“There were times that she would go ‘missing’, it was usually a midnight walk to help clear her head or she heard a hurt animal… I would panic, but Varric never worried and was always able to find her. He was like a blood hound with her…” Dorian elaborated. (And now Nightingale knows.)

“Has anyone checked the tower the Inquisitor likes so much?” Ruffles was grasping at straws. 

Sparkler looked up at the tower, shrouded in the inky blackness of night. Except for the very top, where a shaft of moonlight struck it, brightly illuminating it, “If she was at the top, we would be able to see her. I can’t imagine it would be easy for her to climb the ladder now… Not that that has ever stopped her.”

“Would she truly endanger herself and her baby that way?” Josephine questioned in disbelief. Surely, Athena had more sense than that.

“People do crazy things when they’re hurting or not thinking clearly, Kadan,” Bull answered softly.

Morrigan and Dorian pulled away from the rest of them. Morrigan asked quietly, “Where did she go before we went to fight Corypheus?”

“She went to find Cullen,” Dorian found the witch’s question odd, “she said that she had found him praying in the chantry… But she’s not religious.”

“It doesn’t matter, if she’s trying to find a way to reach him or protect him,” Morrigan said.

“You don’t think it’s the baby?” Dorian needed to be certain.

“I do not. If 'twas, do you not think she would have woke one of us? Or stayed where she was if she couldn’t get to us? It definitely has something to do with the Commander, the question is, what?” Morrigan asked, a question no one but Leliana had an answer for.

“I’m going to the chantry,” Dorian was loud enough for all to hear.

Leliana acknowledged it by saying, “I’ll go to the tower.” And a litany of places went off, her quarters, garderobes, Cullen’s office, and the list went on.

Dorian and Morrigan went to the chantry. Morrigan was the first to enter and saw her friend sobbing and praying. Morrigan stood beside her and gently inquired, “Athena, what happened?”

“Cullen’s dying,” she gasped out. The rawness of her voice told them that saying those two words, ripped her heart out.

“How do you come by this knowledge?” Morrigan knew that Duchess hadn’t talked to Leliana, so she was hesitantly cautious that it was just another horrible nightmare that Athena was reacting to.

“A dream… A dream that was verified,” Athena choked out, tears streaming down her face.

“Verified by whom?”

“A friend,” She looked up at the statue of Andraste, her haunted eyes staring in to the statue’s lifeless ones, and for a brief moment, hating the Maker’s bride. Athena was told, time and again, that she was Andraste’s Herald, that Andraste had blessed her, saved her, and now the rock she had clung to, loves more than life itself, was being ripped away. Athena wanted to scream, How could you do this? I am to represent you and you take away the man I love? And for what? Another person’s war?! Please, let Cullen come back to me!

“Cole?” Dorian asked gently as he came in. Athena nodded in answer, barely hearing her cousin so lost in her agony.

“Who is this Cole?” Morrigan questioned Dorian as Cole stayed far away from her, so they had never met. The Kid once told me that the “Black haired witch sees too much.” (If you understand what he means, let the rest of us know?)

“A spirit… Human… Of compassion,” Sparkler paused, uncertain on how to explain Cole’s unique circumstances. He also wanted to get his cousin off of her knees. His head was far from clear, “He knows, sees, or feels things…I’m not quite sure how.”

“Interesting,” Morrigan commented and turned her attention back to Duchess, who had gone back to murmuring the Maker’s Prayer between broken sobs.

“Everyone is looking for you,” Dorian tried to sound gentle, but seeing his cousin so distraught, rocked him to the core and his velvet voice had and edge of roughness to it.

“So?” Athena asked, bitterly, the silent prayer that she wanted to scream was still echoing in her head.

“They think you’re hurt… One of the soldiers on the night watch saw you on the battlements crying,” Morrigan made an attempt at getting Duchess to do something besides pray and cry. It didn’t work.

Athena didn’t respond, willing herself to reach out to Cullen. Sparkler said, “I’m going to let everyone else know that we found her and that she’s fine… At least physically.”

Morrigan gave a single nod of her head in acknowledgement and walked over to Athena. She stood looking at the statue for a while, listening to Athena’s prayers and heartrending sobs. She was also listening to voices much older and quieter to see how best she could help Duchess, “Athena, when we were held captive, do you remember reaching Cullen in your dreams?”

“Yes, why?” Athena’s answer was perfunctory. She didn’t really care to know the why, it slipped out.

“Do you not think ‘twould be possible for him to be trying to do the same?” Morrigan looked down at her friend.

“He’s not a mage, he can’t access the Fade like we can,” Athena argued. She could not believe that she had to explain this to Morrigan of all people.

“That does not matter considering the bond you have,” Morrigan’s voice gentled, as she referred to the child growing inside Duchess, and then whispered to herself, “if Cullen is unconscious, he’s already in the Fade.”

“Morrigan, if this is just a ploy to get me to leave here and go back to sleep…” Athena warned, luckily for Morrigan, Athena did not hear her whisper.

“’Tis not. I truly believe you will find your love in your dreams,” Morrigan reassured her.

Athena sighed and after some maneuvering got to her feet. The duo went to Athena’s quarters without incident. Athena flopped down on her bed and sighed despondently. The baby kicked which brought a fresh set of tears to her violet eyes. Morrigan said softly, “Try to sleep, Athena. Think on happier times.”

Athena looked as though she wanted to challenge Morrigan but decided against it. Rolling to her side she closed her eyes, placing a protective hand on her expanding middle. It took little time for Athena to fall asleep as exhausted as she was. She looked around to get her bearings and felt a little frantic at not seeing Cullen at first. But as the dream became more focused, the fuzzy blobs turned into shapes and Duchess heard his voice as he took form before her.

“There you are!” He said, “I’ve been searching every where for you.”

“Cullen?” Athena questioned, terrified of what this meant, “Why were you looking for me? Why are you here?”

Wanting to calm the fear in her violet eyes and voice he said, “I’m not dead, at least, not yet. I can still… Feel.”

“That doesn’t help,” Athena half heartedly teased. She walked over to him and looked him over from the top of his hair to his feet, and noticed that he was holding his side, “What happened?”

Cullen nodded, “When I took Anora down, she stabbed me with a poisoned dagger.”

“Is she dead?” Athena asked hopefully.

Cullen chuckled softly and then winced, “The last I saw, she was still alive.” 

He reached out a hand for her to take. Athena grabbed hold of his hand like it was the only thing saving her from death. Pulling her close to him he held Duchess tight against him and kissed her for a very long time. After the kiss he started, “There’s no easy way to tell you this…” Pausing and then sighing, “Athena, I’m dying. I doubt I’ll make it back to Skyhold… To you… I’m sorry.”

“No!” Athena keened, “You promised that we would grow old together! Why are you giving up?”

“I am not giving up! Everyone around me says that I’m dying,” Cullen released her to pace.

“So prove them wrong,” Athena begged with desperation in her voice.

“Anora buried her knife in me to the hilt, with the poison, and being ill on top of it…” He trailed off, “Johan tried to get the poison out, and he got most of it. But they can’t close the wound until they’re certain that all of it is out.”

“That’s nonsense, if they cauterize the wound they’ll destroy the poison,” Athena watched him pace, wanting desperately to be held in his arms, but terrified of what that would mean.

“It’s not that simple,” Cullen said softly, even though he saw Athena’s terror, she was quick enough to come up with a solution, little good it did him now though, “The knife was-”

“Serrated and pulled out of you,” Athena closed her eyes to search back through all the wounds she had helped heal to find a way to heal him.

“She twisted the knife as she pulled it out…. I would be left with a hole in my side. Stitching or magic are the only ways.”

“I knew I should have went with you,” Athena chastised herself.

“So I could watch the love of my life and unborn child suffer a similar fate? Or worse? Absolutely not!” Cullen rounded on her angrily.

“No! So I could heal you, and you could keep your promise to me,” Athena was barely holding on to her tears.

“You know that most battles are unpredictable. Not to mention that when I left you were still not completely healthy... Would you have been willing to stay at the tent all day and wait for me to return?” Cullen’s voice betrayed his irritation with her. He already knew the answer to his question, there would be no way Athena would sit out a battle when those she loved had to fight.

Athena didn’t answer him because she had correctly guessed Cullen would greatly disapprove of her answer. Instead, she questioned him, “Do you really think I can go on without you?”

“You have to,” Cullen begged, not willing to allow her to sacrifice everything she accomplished for him.

“No, I-I can’t. None of this means anything to me without you,” Athena started crying.

“You are the Herald, the Inquisitor. The people of Thedas need you,” Cullen said softly as he wiped her tears away, and then barely above a whisper he choked out, “Our child needs you.”

“Our child needs you, too. And I need you,” everything in her was laid bare with those words.

“Athena,” Cullen choked out, hugging her to him. Damning the searing pain he felt.

“Try… please try…. Come home to me… Don’t give up,” Athena brokenly begged, feeling the dream starting to slip away.

Cullen closed his brown eyes against the tears that were falling from them and whispered, as he prayed that it wasn’t an empty promise, “I’ll try. I love you, Athena.”

“I love you, too, Cullen,” She whispered back as the dream ended.

And that’s where our story ends...

 

Just kidding.

On the way to Skyhold Johan and I heard Curly murmur Duchess’ name and watched as the shaking slowed to a stop. I put my ear to Curly’s chest to make sure I could still hear his heart beating and breathed a sigh of relief, “If anyone can save him, his wife can.”

We reached Skyhold in four days instead of the normal week. Stopping for short breaks and to rest the horses, but going pretty much nonstop. Cullen felt like he was burning up from the inside. Johan and I weren’t sure if it was the poison, if infection had set in, or the illness that was making him feverish. As we rode through Skyhold’s gates I heard Athena ask, “Where is he?”

One of the soldiers that came with us answered, “In the wagon, Your Worship.”

And then I heard Duchess yell, “Let me go!”

“Wait until they get him out of the wagon and upstairs,” Dorian suggested, struggling to hold on to her. 

“Why? The faster I see him, the faster I can heal him,” Athena broke her arm free of her cousin’s hold.

“He needs to be checked for infection at the very least. You also need to think of yourself and your unborn child,” Dorian responded with irritation.

“Have you forgotten that I’m a healer? Making sure my husband lives is thinking of me and my child,” Athena rounded on him angrily.

At that point I thought Sparkler could use a little help. So I crawled out of the wagon, “Duchess, there’s barely enough room in here for me, much less you. Plus, Curly isn’t exactly comfortable in there.”

“What are you waiting for? Get him out,” Athena was surprisingly calm… At least she was until we pulled Cullen out on the stretcher. He was very, very still, an ashen color had taken over his skin, his hair was messy, and he had a beard. Fighting back tears she bent down to kiss him and came away shocked at how hot he felt, “Varric, have you been giving him water?”

“In the past four days he’s only been awake for about five minutes,” I answered.

She looked at me curiously, “I thought I showed you… Never mind. Someone needs to get Ellendra.” Bending down she whispered in his ear, “You’re home now. Don’t give up on me just yet,” taking Cullen’s hand and placing it on her stomach, “we still need you.”

What sounded suspiciously like a groan came out of Cullen. I cleared my throat to get rid of the lump that had lodged itself there as I witnessed the tender scene and said, “That’s the first sound out of him that we’ve heard in days.”

“Get him to our quarters,” Athena ordered and followed behind her husband as everyone else ran off to do her bidding. Once in our lovers’ quarters they gently took Cullen off of the stretcher and laid him in bed. By the time I reached the room Ellendra was already there looking at Cullen’s wound. Athena was busy preparing items that may need to be used.

“The poison didn’t effect him at all. However, he’s lost a lot of blood, and even though I see no signs of infection, he’s burning up as if he has one. You had said that you believed he had caught your illness?” Ellendra asked.

“Yes,” Athena sat on the edge of the bed and took hold of Cullen’s hand, “Could dehydration play a part in this? Or lyrium withdrawal?”

“Dehydration? Yes… I had not realized the Commander had stopped taking lyrium. Was this a recent thing?” Ellendra inquired.

“Not really, but he’s had issues with it when he pushes himself too hard,” Athena ignored everything and everyone else in the room.

“Recent issues?”

“A couple days before I became ill, I took the pain of the withdrawal away,” Athena released her husband’s hand to brush the hair back and off of Cullen’s forehead.

“I didn’t realize that you still had to do that,” Dorian quietly spoke.

“He doesn’t let it get as bad anymore,” Athena gazed down at Cullen and fought tears. Wishing he would open his eyes.

“First things first, we need to heal the wound,” Ellendra said, the room fell silent as Ellendra healed the wound to where there wasn’t even a scar. “Inquisitor, which do you think is the more pressing issue? The dehydration or the fever?”

“I think the dehydration is,” Athena said softly, never taking her gaze from Curly.

“Then we need to get him propped up on pillows so we can get water in to him,” Ellendra volunteered Bull. 

Tiny went over and partially lifted Curly up while Athena arranged the pillows behind her husband. When Cullen was in a somewhat seated position Athena took a spoon and a glass of cool water. Sitting beside her husband, she opened his mouth and dribbled some water in it. Athena then closed Cullen’s mouth and rubbed his throat to get him to swallow. 

Dorian was bewildered by this, “If dehydration is the most pressing issue why aren’t you giving him more water?”

“The ashen color of the Commander’s skin is because he hasn’t had anything to drink in days. If she were to give him that entire glass of water now, she would kill him. To treat severe dehydration, you give them small amounts of water until they are able to drink for themselves,” Ellendra explained as Athena didn’t hear a word Sparkler said. Ellendra patted Athena’s shoulder, “I’ll be back in a couple hours.”

Athena nodded, acknowledging, at least, Ellendra’s touch. We all followed Ellendra out so Athena could be alone with her husband and that was when Athena laid beside him and let the tears fall. She knew he was bad, but this? It was a miracle he survived this long, if Athena was completely honest with herself, she didn’t know if Cullen could survive.

When Ellendra, Morrigan, and Dorian came back hours later, they saw Athena’s haggard appearance and that dinner was barely touched. Dorian chastised her, “Athena you are no good to Cullen if you don’t take care of yourself.”

Athena didn’t respond to her cousin until after she finished caring for her husband, “I tried to eat, but what ever the main dish is smells disgusting.”

Morrigan walked over to Athena’s desk and noticed that the chocolate chip cookies were almost gone. She raised her eyebrow, “Craving?”

Athena half smiled, “Some days the cravings seem constant.”

“Of course you would have chocolate chip cookies for dinner…” Dorian quipped.

“Far more frequently than just today, I should think,” Ellendra smiled knowingly as Athena nodded her head in assent, trying to put Cullen’s hair back to how he usually styled it. It didn’t work. Ellendra looked Cullen over, much was unchanged but the the fever seemed to have lessened a bit and she could detect a hint of color returning to his skin. “Getting water in him is helping. If he survives this, he will be weak for a very long time.”

“Why?” Dorian wanted to make certain that what he was thinking matched up with what Ellendra was thinking.

“Mainly because of how much blood he lost. Being dehydrated isn’t doing him any favors either,” Ellendra answered while Athena went to the garderobe.

When she came out she yawned and stretched. Dorian offered, “Why don’t you go and get some sleep? Morrigan and I will take care of Cullen.”

“I’m not leaving him,” The desperation in Athena’s tone was plain for all to hear.

“Inquisitor, you still need your rest,” Ellendra warned softly.

“I know, but I can’t leave him,” Athena repeated, her voice haunted with the fear that if she left Cullen’s side for more than garderobe breaks, that she would lose him.

“Then lay beside him,” Morrigan suggested. Which is what Athena did and she was asleep in minutes. 

Ellendra left and Morrigan and Dorian quietly talked. Dorian inquired, “Do you think she was able to reach him?”

“I do. When I was pregnant with Kieran I was able to see his father in my dreams quite easily. If I had any desire to speak with him, I could have,” Morrigan answered as they watched Athena, while sleeping, pull Cullen’s hand to her expanded belly.

As soon as Athena started dreaming, she called out, “Cullen?”

“I’m here,” Cullen appeared out of a mist.

“You’re home now,” She tried desperately to not show her fear that she thought she was losing him.

“I noticed the change… My side doesn’t hurt anymore. Did you heal me?” Cullen asked as he took her hand.

She chuckled, relaxing, he didn’t seem so far away now, “No, that was Ellendra. She said that the poison had no time to effect you. However, you lost a lot of blood and you’re very dehydrated.”

“How are we able to meet here like this?” Cullen wondered.

“I don’t know, I’m just glad we are,” Athena answered as he placed a hand on her belly. She found it sweet, but curious, “What are you doing?”

“Seeing if I can feel the baby kick,” Cullen blushed a little.

Athena chuckled, “I wonder….” She disappeared for a second. 

When she came back, he questioned, “Where did you go?”

“I woke up a little,” She smiled at him.

“Your laying beside me, aren’t you?” Cullen thought he felt the baby kicking, but he wasn’t sure.

“Where else would I be?” Athena asked as she kissed him.

**

It took a week after returning to Skyhold for Cullen to regain consciousness. When he did, he groaned. Athena came running in from the east balcony when she heard him. Sitting down beside him she whispered hopefully, “Cullen?”

He opened his brown eyes to gaze at his wife and croaked out, “Morning?”

Athena chuckled with tears in her eyes, “Yes, it’s morning. How are you feeling?”

“Like I was run over by wild horses,” Cullen whispered.

Athena felt the baby kicking and took his hand to place it on her belly. Cullen’s eyes grew wide and put his other hand on her belly “You’ve grown.”

“Pregnant women usually do that,” She smiled at him.

“I know that,” Cullen whispered, blushing.

Athena bent down to kiss him gently. When the kiss ended she reached over to the night stand to get a glass of water for her husband. Handing it to him she ordered, “Drink it slowly. You’re still dehydrated.” 

Cullen did as she said and shakily handed it back to his wife. The shaking didn’t go unnoticed by Athena, “Does anything specific hurt?”

“Athena, right now everything hurts,” Cullen sighed, afraid to move too much.

Athena watched him for a moment and then asked, “Do you want me to see if some of the pain is lyrium withdrawal?”

“Not if it’s going to hurt you,” He whispered, reverting to old habits as he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the pillows. 

Athena shook her head, thinking, we are not having that argument again, and used her magic on him. As she waited patiently for him to open his eyes she felt the baby shifting around a lot, instinctively she rubbed her belly slowly to get the baby to calm down and chuckled as it followed her hand.

Hearing his wife chuckle, Cullen opened his eyes and lifted his head slightly to see what was amusing her. What he saw brought tears to his eyes, thankful to be alive, no matter how weak... To be able to see his wife, hold her, feel their child kick, he knew he had been granted an incredible gift. 

“Cullen? What’s wrong?” Athena broke him out of his reverie.

“Nothing,” He smiled at her through his tears.

“Then why are you crying?” 

“Because I’m grateful to be alive… To be with you… To be able to do this,” Cullen placed his hand overtop of hers, which was resting on top of her belly, and lifted himself up to kiss her. He didn’t make it. Groaning, he collapsed back on the pillows and closed his eyes against the fresh wave of pain that assaulted him, whispering, “How long have I been unconscious?”

“A week since you came back to Skyhold. Varric said that it took four days to get back from Honnleath and you were unconscious for all of them,” Athena said softly, “ What were you trying to do?”

“I wanted to kiss you,” he choked out, realizing with horror, that he had missed an entire month with his wife.

“I think I can help you with that,” She leaned forward and gently kissed him on the lips. As he wrapped his arms around her, she scooched forward on the bed to get closer to him as the kiss deepened.

“Maker, I am so sorry I left you alone for a month,” Cullen croaked out when the kiss ended.

Athena closed her eyes against the tears that threatened, “All that matters now is that you are alive.” She paused to rein in her shaking voice, she continued with absolute certainty, “You are never going in to battle without me again.”

“Is that an order, Inquisitor?” Cullen asked softly, cupping her check.

Athena kissed him with all the desperation and terror that she had been feeling for the last month. When they finally broke apart for air she said with tears threatening to over flow from her violet eyes, “Yes, it is.”

“I don’t think either one of us have to worry about that for a while,” Cullen assured her. 

There was a knock on the door, and Athena called out, “Come in.”

With breakfast Ellendra came in, and breathed a sigh of relief, “Commander, you’re awake.”

“Yes, I’m awake,” Cullen could not take his eyes off of his wife.

“How are you feeling?” Ellendra walked over to him as Athena left him to get breakfast for herself and Cullen.

“Weak, tired, and in pain,” Cullen answered barely above a whisper.

“Did the Inquisitor use her lyrium withdrawal spell?” Ellendra checked Curly for a fever.

“Yes,” Athena answered for her husband causing him to chuckle softly.

“No change?” 

“My head isn’t throbbing anymore,” he followed Duchess’ every move around the room.

“That’s a good thing. Your fever has broken as well. It appears, Commander, that you are on the mend. You will probably feel weak for quite some time yet, you lost a lot of blood and need to rest as much as possible.” Ellendra informed him.

“What about the pain?” Cullen rasped out.

“That’s probably related to the dehydration, blood loss, and being unconscious for almost two weeks. If you need to get up you will need assistance to walk,” Ellendra wished our lovers a good day.

Cullen swallowed hard and closed his eyes. Athena brought a breakfast tray over to him and sat down beside him. He looked at the tray seeing only a bowl, a plate, and two glasses of water, “Where’s yours?”

“Your breakfast is in the bowl,” Athena took the plate and sat it on her belly to eat. 

“Broth?” Cullen questioned dubiously.

“Until you use the water closet, you get nothing but liquid. Drink it slowly,” Athena took a bite of her food.

“Athena, I’m starving,” Cullen complained.

“Good. But if you get anything more than liquid right now, it wouldn’t be pleasant. Same with drinking too fast.”

Curly sighed and looked dejectedly at his unappetizing meal. He gave in and started sipping the broth, “What did I miss?”

“I think some of the soldiers were terrified of Bull,” Athena chuckled. She was surprised at how light and natural it sounded. Athena felt like she hadn’t laughed in a very long time. (I wasn’t there to amuse her.)

“Were?” He took another sip, thinking that Tiny should still be in charge.

“Darius came back from Denerim a few days ago, and took over until you can resume command.”

“They know then,” Cullen sighed wearily, wondering how he would face the soldiers, after being out of commission for so long.

“Everyone knows that you were severely injured. Only Darius and Johan, out of those under your command, know the full extent of what happened. Now that you’re awake, I’m sure he’ll be bringing things to your attention.” Athena got up for seconds and instead got several chocolate chip cookies.

As she sat back down beside Cullen, he chuckled when he saw what was on her plate, “Maybe you should have the broth and I’ll eat the food.”

“No. And yes our child still wants chocolate chip cookies… Some days to the exclusion of everything else,” Athena’s sigh sounded slightly frustrated.

Cullen laughed and immediately regretted it as it sent spasms of pain through out his weakened body, after wincing he said, “It sounds as though you’re getting sick of them.”

“And what if I am? I have to have them, with every meal. Yesterday it was the only thing I found appetizing,” She huffed.

Cullen smiled as his tone gentled, “What of you?” 

Athena looked at him, confused. After he took a sip of his broth and made a face (which Athena had to fight a chuckle on,) he asked, “Any trips I should know about? Dragon slayings? Anything new with the baby besides forcing you to revert to older eating habits?”

“No, I didn’t have to go anywhere or slay any dragons. I didn’t even have to really face any nobles since the King and Queen of Fereldan left. I think Leliana is quite content to have me stay behind Skyhold’s walls until well after the baby is born. The baby is doing fine as you’ve noticed, their kicks and movements are getting stronger. And while you were away I think half of Skyhold wished I had gone with you,” Athena smiled.

“Why?” 

“I was worse than you when I was away,” She tried to hide her blush behind her hair.

“Somehow, I don’t think I’ll be told the same thing,” Cullen correctly guessed.

“It’s true though,” Athena leaned in to kiss him. As the kiss was ending there was a knock on the door, she called out, “Come in.”

“Expecting someone?” Cullen asked softly.

“Since Darius got back he’s been showing up after breakfast.”

“Why?” 

“Because I thought your wife would need a break.” Darius came up the stairs, “Maker, it’s good to see you awake, Commander.”

Cullen took a sip of his broth and made a face again, this time Duchess couldn’t keep the chuckle in. Cullen glowered at her, “This is foul.”

“It very well may be, but you’re talking above a whisper, so I would say that it’s doing exactly what it’s supposed to do,” Athena smirked at her husband as she got off the bed to give Darius a hug and then disappeared in to the garderobe.

“Why is she hugging you now?” Curly asked.

“I’ve had to clear the hall on several occasions of hand ringers, well wishers, and doom sayers since I came back.” Darius said, “Plus, I don’t tell her what she should or shouldn’t be doing.”

“She hasn’t left my side has she?” Cullen rhetorically questioned as he sighed and took another sip of the broth and grimaced, mumbling, “It just gets worse.”

Darius chuckled, “It’s Athena’s recipe.”

“Which means I should drink all of it, no matter what it tastes like,” Cullen grumbled.

“She’s only subjecting it to you because she loves you,” Darius smiled.

Cullen turned his head to look at the garderobe door and then his neck yelled at him, “I know.”

They talked quietly of the Inquisition’s forces and what Darius would like to do until Athena came back out. Darius asked, “Any word on when you’ll be resuming command?”

“I just woke up this morning, Darius,” Cullen griped (he was starting to be a worse patient than Duchess.).

“So, I should tell the troops that you’ll be back in full form tomorrow then?” Darius teased on his way out.

Athena chuckled as he left and watched Cullen stare pensively out past the balcony. Wondering what he was thinking she said softly, “Cullen?”

“Do you want me to take over being Commander again?” He questioned, never taking his eyes off of what he was staring at. He wasn’t sure if he was asking himself or Athena.

“What?” Athena thought that she didn’t hear him correctly. When he didn’t respond, she asked, “Where is this coming from?” Athena waited for a response, when she realized she wasn’t going to get one she tried a different approach, “Is that what you want? To not be Commander of the Inquisition anymore?”

“I… Yes… No…” Cullen sighed, “I don’t know….” He finally looked at her, “I missed so much with you, with the baby. Do you think we can pull off being parents and Inquisitor and Commander?”

“Cullen, we’ll do this the same way we’ve done everything else, together,” Athena said softly, encouragingly, “The only way I want you to give up being Commander is if that is truly what you desire. It is not a decision that needs to be made now or even in the next three months. I want you to get better so we can dance again before the baby comes.”

“I think I can manage that,” Cullen stifled a yawn. Athena took the breakfast tray from him, “I thought you wanted me to drink all of that.”

“I wanted you to get enough in you where you could talk normally and hopefully it took away a little of the pain you were feeling. I never said you had to drink it all, just that you had to drink it slowly,” Athena reminded him as she put the tray down and servants came in to clear away the food (except for the chocolate chip cookies.)

“You’re amazing you know that?” Cullen couldn’t stifle the yawn this time.

She came over and kissed him, “Get some rest, love.”

“You don’t have to stay,” Cullen mumbled, fighting sleep. 

“Cullen, go to sleep,” Athena ordered as she sat at her desk to write letters, stopping every now and again to place a gentle hand on her belly where she felt the baby kick. She would also pause to stop and fight tears, so incredibly grateful that he was conscious again. She wrote to Cullen’s family to let them know that he had regained consciousness and that it seemed as though the worst of it was behind him.

Around lunch time Dorian and I went to relieve Athena and we were pleasantly surprised to hear her laughing. Then we heard Curly’s voice, “This isn’t fair, Athena. You drugged me with that broth this morning and you expect me to drink this again?”

“You need your rest,” Athena was insistent.

“I’ve spent most of the past two weeks sleeping. I think I should be allowed to not sleep my first day of being conscious away,” he argued.

Smiling at us, she said, “That’s a shame because after my meeting I was planning on coming back and taking a nap.”

“Who are you having a meeting with?” Cullen asked.

“The Arl of Denerim. He arrived shortly after you did. Leliana and Josephine have been meeting with him but he still wants to meet with me,” Athena was reluctant to leave.

“He’s in good hands, Athena,” Sparkler assured her gently. I wondered if he had suddenly fallen ill. 

“No chess or Wicked Grace,” She warned the three of us.

“Are you trying to say that chess isn’t a calm game?” Sparkler teased.

I chuckled, “We won’t torment Curly too much.”

“Not when you play,” Athena responded to Dorian’s question. Kissing her husband again, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” 

Cullen nodded in answer as he took a sip of the broth he was ordered to have for lunch.

Athena left and met Leliana in the main hall, “Ellendra said that the Commander is awake?”

“He is,” She answered with a soft smile lighting up her face.

“That is good news, indeed,” Leliana remarked. They went in to Ruffles’ office together, had a brief meeting with the Arl, who had hoped to meet Alistair at Skyhold, but couldn’t resist a chance to meet Athena. As the Arl left Ruffles and Nightingale sat down to eat. Leliana inquired, “Not joining us?”

“I told Cullen that I would be back as soon as I could,” Duchess informed them as she left and practically ran to her quarters. 

She stopped half way up to catch her breath thinking, I wasn’t even running. She continued to walk the rest of the way. When she reached their quarters she saw Cullen interrogating us, “Tell me what Athena did while I was unconscious.”

“Curly, she loves you, of course Duchess took care of you,” I informed him.

Cullen closed his eyes as if he was feeling more pain, “Please tell me that she slept.”

“I did sleep. You know that,” Athena looked quizzically at me. I shrugged in response, I was just as confused as she was, and Duchess walked over to her husband and asked gently, “How are you feeling?”

“You didn’t tell me that you were up every hour taking care of me,” Cullen wrestled with his guilt.

“I wasn’t up every hour. I had help,” Athena wondered where this was coming from. She knew we wouldn’t tell Curly something like that, “I’m not going to lie to you and say that I didn’t want to be, but right now I can fight sleep only so much before I’m not given a choice.”

“Then why did the maid say that you weren’t eating or sleeping yesterday?” Cullen inquired. 

It was all beginning to make sense now (at least for me,) “Was that who you were talking to when I was in the water closet?”

Cullen nodded, “She sighed in relief to see me awake and mumbled that the Inquisitor would finally be able to eat and sleep. When I asked her about it, she said that you,” he paused to take hold of Duchess’ hand, “had not slept or ate anything for several days.”

Dorian chuckled, “She’s never seen you try to sleep has she?”

“Or eat,” I quipped.

“It appears we have a new maid… Cullen, it wasn’t that I wasn’t eating, it was that I was only hungry for chocolate chip cookies yesterday. As for sleeping, it’s getting exceedingly harder to find a comfortable position,” Athena gently explained, now understanding why Curly was interrogating us.

Cullen yawned and shook his head, making a poor attempt to stay awake. Athena smiled at him and whispered, “Get some rest. I’ll be here when you wake.”

By the time Athena finished speaking, Cullen had fallen asleep. Checking to make sure that was all it was, she removed his tray and put it on the table, and then she looked directly at Dorian, “Why didn’t you correct her?”

“The servants had been struggling with taking lunch away. I had gone down the stairs as she came up. If I had known…”

Athena sighed, “It’s all right. Can one of you find this maid and bring her here?”

“Are you sure that’s wise, Duchess?” I questioned, Athena didn’t seem angry, but that made me worry more.

“I need her to know how important it is that Cullen not be bothered with trivial things.”

“We’ll bring her here,” Sparkler promised, “Will you be all right?”

Athena nodded and we left in search of the maid. We were lucky (unlucky?) enough to find her in the main hall and delivered her promptly to Duchess. The maid curtsied as she approached Athena, “Inquisitor?”

“I understand that you are new here?” The maid nodded in response to Duchess’ question. Athena continued firmly, “The Commander just woke up at sunrise. He is still in a great deal of pain. I understand that my eating and sleeping patterns are well known through out the staff. However, the Commander needs to get himself better before he starts in on me about my eating and sleeping habits.”

“He isn’t talking like he’s in pain,” The maid actually had the gall to argue with her.

“He hides it well at times…” Athena raised an eyebrow at the cheek, but was interrupted by her cousin.

“He’s sitting in bed and barely moving. He’s not hiding it well,” Sparkler griped and then he came close to snarling at the maid, “The Inquisitor knows her husband better than any of us. You do not question her regarding his care.”

The maid bobbed her head and with a quick curtsy, flew down the stairs and away from us. Athena perversely smiled, “Cullen won’t admit how much pain he is in to anyone. The broth that he’s been getting has strengthening and sleeping herbs in it. Unfortunately there’s no magic or herb in the world that can give him back the blood he lost. It’s going to take a long while before he’s back to himself.”

“Do you think that will happen before the baby is born?” Dorian asked.

Athena shrugged and then yawned, “I don’t know… right now I’m just glad he’s alive.”

Dorian and I said our goodbyes so she could get some rest. We started betting on how fast Curly would heal. Hearing our banter, Athena smiled and went to lay beside her husband.

**

In the middle of the night Athena woke to find Cullen missing from the bed. Alarmed, she jumped out of bed and immediately illuminated the room with her magic. She called out, “Cullen?” When she didn’t get a response she turned the light brighter and walked over to his side of the bed. With no sign of him she knocked on the garderobe door and called out for him again.

“Be right out,” was the muffled response. Athena sighed in relief and stood at the door waiting for him. When Curly came out he was using the door frame for support. Athena rushed over to help him walk. He ordered, “No.”

“Cullen, you can’t support yourself,” Athena argued.

“I made it here, didn’t I?” He refused to let go of the door frame and Athena refused to let go of him.

“If you fall on the floor I wouldn’t be able to get you into bed,” Athena stated.

“And I wouldn’t want you to,” Cullen tried to gently pull his arm from around her shoulders. 

Athena was having none of it and held his hand tighter, “You never let me walk to the garderobe by myself when I’m sick or weak.”

“You are quite a bit smaller than me. If I fall on you I will hurt you,” Cullen still tried to extricate himself from her grasp without losing his precarious balance.

“Cullen, let me help you, please?” 

“I don’t want to risk hurting you,” he said with emphasis.

“If you use me and the wall you won’t,” Athena sounded sure of it. 

Cullen growled but submitted in letting his wife help him back to bed. The only reason he didn’t continue the fight was because he felt like he was going to drop to the floor. Once they were back in bed a sigh shuddered through Athena as she fought tears of relief. Always observant of his wife, “Athena, what’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing,” Athena felt Cullen tense and figured she better tell him, “When I woke up and you weren’t in bed, I panicked.”

“I had to use the garderobe,” Cullen found this reminiscent of what he goes through every time Duchess disappears on him.

“I know… I…” She gasped, realizing that she does this to him all the time, “this is what it feels like?”

Cullen chuckled softly, knowing better than to answer that. He pulled her closer to him and they drifted off to sleep.

**

Cullen was usually a pretty fast healer. He was very frustrated at how long it was taking to get back to what he once was. So much so that he was considering taking lyrium again. Morrigan walked in to his office and saw him fingering the box with the lyrium draughts in it, “You are very lucky ‘tis I that found you instead of your lady wife.”

Cullen didn’t look up as he played with the lid of the box, “What do you want, Morrigan?”

Ignoring his question she asked one of her own, “Why are you here? I thought Darius was still in charge of the Inquisition forces.”

“I needed to get away,” Cullen was surly.

“From your wife?” Morrigan moved closer to his desk and him.

“Of course not! All of my “keepers.” They refuse to let me do anything!” Cullen frowned as he opened the box.

“Athena is wondering where you are, apparently you were to have dinner with the qunari and the Ambassador,” Morrigan told him. What she didn’t tell him was that she was lying and that it was Duchess who needed rescuing.

Cullen swore, “I forgot. Can you let her know that I’ll be there in a minute?”

“You know how highly I regard the Inquisitor. I also know that she would think you were harming yourself more by taking lyrium than the temporary gain you think you may receive from it.”

“The pain I can take, but the weakness is driving me mad. I almost collapsed on top of Athena this morning because of this incessant weakness. She’s doing it all without complaint. I see how tired she is, and all I am is a burden to her right now. At least when I was taking lyrium I felt stronger,” Cullen paced behind his desk.

“Athena has a very different opinion of what is burdening her. You have made great strides in the weeks you have been conscious, especially when one considers how close to death you were. She is quite upset with your “keepers” as well. She’s taken to calling them mother hens.” Morrigan answered as gently as she could.

“Johan is the worst,” Cullen griped.

Morrigan chuckled, “He was there when you were injured and he cares a great deal about you. But, I will do my best to see if I can get him to back off.”

“When did you become so wise?” Cullen asked as they left so he could meet up with his wife.

“I have always been wise. But ‘tis your wife that has made me the better person,” Morrigan smiled.

“Athena definitely has that effect,” he replied softly as they went their separate ways. Cullen continued in to the main hall while Morrigan went off to find Johan. Cullen scanned the crowd to find his wife, instead he saw a semi-circle of people around the throne. Almost as if he had shouted to clear a path, the semi-circle parted to reveal a very worn and tired looking Athena. Anger surged through Cullen, however, he wasn’t sure if he was more angry at himself or the people accosting her. He walked swiftly to her side and said in a tone that would brook no arguments, “The Inquisitor has heard enough for the day.”

The crowd dispersed slowly and Athena looked up at him, immensely grateful, “Thank you.”

“I’m sorry,” Cullen chastised himself for leaving her alone.

“It’s all right. I understand all too well the desire to hide,” Athena sighed, desiring to hide for a while.

“It wasn’t you I was hiding from,” Cullen assured her as he crouched down beside the throne, but kept a hand on the top of the chair to keep his balance.

“Thank you,” She smiled wanly at him.

“Are you all right?” He asked as he noticed her wince and rub her belly.

“Tired. And our little one has been very active today.”

“If you aren’t up to this dinner, we can postpone it,” Cullen offered as a solution as he stood.

Athena got up much more slowly, “Cullen, their wedding is on the morrow, it can’t be postponed.”

“I thought their wedding wasn’t for several months yet,” Cullen wrapped an arm around his wife’s waist as she wobbled to steady her.

“Josie wanted to move it up,” she put her arm around Curly’s waist and smiled up at him in thanks.

“I wonder why,” Cullen mulled over possible reasons that Ruffles would want to move up her wedding.

“She hasn’t told me why… Maybe we’ll find out tonight,” Athena enjoyed having her husband’s arm around her. Walking in to Josephine’s office they heard Leliana and Ruffles arguing.

“What would you have me do, Leliana? Should I give up on marrying the one I love because Blackwall and I once had feelings for each other? It takes several months to reach where he is. He’s a grey warden now, why isn’t he asking them for help?” Josephine shouted.

“Of course not! But you are from Antiva, surely you could have some friends help him. He has asked the wardens, they aren’t willing to help him,” Leliana responded.

Cullen and Athena looked at each other, bewildered. And then said to each other at the same time, “You’re not allowed.”

Josephine heard them and chuckled, “Forgive us. Blackwall is asking for a favor from me that would require me to go home immediately… Which is something I cannot do at the moment.”

“Do you and Bull want to go to Antiva?” Athena inquired.

Cullen followed with, “Speaking of the qunari, where is he?”

“Not right now, and he had to….” Ruffles searched for the right words, “release some aggression.”

“That bad?” Athena tried to not lean heavily on Cullen as she was very aware that he wasn’t as strong as he would like to be. Cullen noticed her stiffen and wince and motioned that they should sit.

“Yes,” Josephine joined them.

“No,” Leliana said at the same time as Ruffles.

“You two normally don’t have shouting matches, what is this favor?” Cullen jumped in as he gently rubbed Athena’s back.

“He’s in prison because he is a double to a murderer in Antiva,” Leliana explained.

“Why aren’t the grey wardens helping him?” Athena found it very odd that they wouldn’t help him.

“It is the grey wardens that are being murdered… He also refused to have a relationship with the Commander in Antiva,” Josephine informed them.

“Are we sure he’s not doing this?” Cullen hoped not but given Blackwall’s past…

“Yes,” Leliana said, “the murderer has been caught but they refuse to exchange prisoners.”

“That explains why I haven’t seen you this week,” Duchess said to Leliana, sighing she asked, “Do you think a letter from me would help?”

“You know, a letter from you and a personal visit from my mother to deliver the letter might sway them,” Josephine brightened at the idea.

“I’ll write it as soon as I get back to my quarters,” Athena promised.

Her husband disagreed with her, “First thing in the morning.”

“I may forget by then,” She warned.

“One of us will remind you,” Leliana assured her as Bull walked in.

Ruffles smiled at Bull, which melted the anger he was feeling, “You found a solution?”

“Thanks to Athena we did,” Leliana said.

“She’ll have the baby before she gets out of the mountains!” Tiny roared about to go on a tirade.

Athena hid her face in Cullen’s shoulder not able to stop from laughing. Cullen chuckled, “No one is going anywhere. All Athena is doing is writing a letter.”

Bull sighed in relief as he sat beside his fiancee. Leliana said on her way out, “I will leave you to your dinner.”

Athena stopped laughing, “Leliana isn’t staying?”

“She said that she had work that she needed to do,” Ruffles explained.

“Varric’s been calling it “the Curly complex”,” Bull intoned. 

Cullen shook his head and complained, “I haven’t been allowed to work in weeks.”

“As quickly as you’re healing you’ll be back to work in no time,” Athena encouraged him. She wished she could stop working, but alas, an Inquisitor’s work is never done.

“Remind me of that tomorrow,” Cullen almost pleaded.

“Again with the needing to remember things!” Athena was quite irritated with herself that she kept forgetting things.

“You’re the one that sent Morrigan after me!”

“I did no such thing! I had fallen asleep until Morrigan woke me to settle disputes,” Athena argued.

“I wasn’t gone that long,” Cullen griped, “and I haven’t seen you since you left after lunch.”

“My dear, sweet husband, I can fall asleep at the drop of a hat now,” she blushed, “I sat down in the garden to take a little break… Only to have Morrigan wake me two hours later.”

“So, it’s not that you forget things, it’s just that you fall asleep,” Cullen teased and briefly kissed her.

While Curly and Duchess were teasing each other, Tiny and Ruffles started kissing… As their teasing wound down, the kissing intensified. Trying not to chuckle Athena started to eat. Cullen was surprised by this, “You don’t want to wait?”

“No, I don’t. Your child is very demanding about when it wants to eat,” Athena informed him.

“My child?” Cullen asked, pretending to be incensed.

“It certainly wants me to eat like you,” Athena smirked, knowing her gibe would fluster her husband. Sadly, it didn’t work as well as she planned.  
“I’m trying to regain my strength,” Cullen sounded miffed but his tone gentled as he placed a hand on her growing belly, “and this one is gaining strength.”

“There are no worries there, our baby is very strong,” Athena tried not to look at Bull and Ruffles as they were still kissing. 

Cullen started eating as well and wondered, “Who’s idea was this?”

“Josephine’s,” Athena smiled sweetly at him.

Bull growled, “I cannot wait to see you heavy with child.” 

Athena and Cullen looked at each other, realization dawning. Athena said quietly, “It appears we have our answer as to why the wedding was moved up.”

“Josephine is with child?” Cullen asked. When he didn’t get an answer, Curly looked at Athena ruefully, and he cleared his throat loudly. Getting his wife to chuckle as Bull and Josephine sat up, blushing. Cullen smirked and asked his question again.

“Not yet, but we were told that it’s possible,” Ruffles informed our lovers as Bull put a protective arm around her shoulders. 

“That was in question?” Cullen was confused.

“With what the Empress went through… I thought it would be better to find out what could happen if I became with child,” Josephine blushed.

“Josie, you don’t take lyrium, it would progress normally. Is this why the wedding was moved up?” Athena asked.

“No, my mother had told me that this was the only date any of my family could show up. We’re going to go to Antiva after your baby is born,” Ruffles explained.

“Have you told Leliana yet?” Cullen inquired.

“We meant to, but then she brought up the news about Blackwall…” Josephine sounded sad.

“And then things got heated,” Tiny grumbled, still sore that Blackwall was brought up.

“I understand,” Cullen said as Athena tried to stifle a yawn and laid her head on his shoulder.

“How have you been feeling, Cullen?” Bull noted how tired Curly looked.

Cullen looked down at his wife thinking on how to answer the question… pride and his position demanded that he gloss over what he was feeling, but he considered Bull a friend. Seeing Curly’s hesitation Bull launched in to a story about being in Seheron, at the end he said, “It took me six months to recover from the blood loss and poison.”

“Maker’s breath! I hope it doesn’t take me that long,” Cullen cursed softly.

“I doubt Anora’s blade was covered with Vint poison,” Bull chuckled.

“It won’t take you that long. The poison only briefly entered your body. You aren’t dehydrated anymore, and now the biggest issue is the blood loss.... No magic in the world can recreate blood,” Athena told him as she rubbed the top of her belly and lifted her head from Cullen’s shoulder, wincing at the movement.

“Athena, are you all right?” Ruffles was worried.

She smiled at her friend, “I’m fine, Josie. Comfortable positions are getting harder to find. I fell asleep sitting in the garden and the throne didn’t help matters any.”

“The throne is uncomfortable for you?” Josephine became alarmed.

“Now, and for the next couple months, yes,” Athena answered, “but I do not want you doing anything about it until after your honeymoon.”

“Nonsense, it’s only a couple pillows. I’ll have it done tonight,” Ruffles said with certainty.

Athena shook her head at her friend and yawned, “I’m sorry to cut this short, but I’m exhausted,” she stood and wobbled. Cullen placed two steadying hands on her hips which were quickly disappearing behind Athena’s belly. She whispered her thanks as she placed her hand at the small of her back.

Cullen stood after he was certain that his wife was steady and they said their goodnights. They made their exit and slowly navigated the stairs. Cullen once again had his arm around her waist, and she his. They stopped half way up so they both could catch their breath. Guilt washed over Curly and he murmured, “I should be carrying you.”

Athena was supporting herself with a hip braced against the wall. She held out her hand for Cullen to take and pulled him closer to her, “So long as you don’t ask me to run anywhere for the next couple months, I’ll be all right.” 

Cullen wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him as tight as he could without crushing her to hide the tears that sprang to his eyes, feeling so incredibly unworthy of her understanding nature, but incredibly grateful for it all the same. When he had his emotions under control he kissed her, “I will get better and I will carry you up these stairs before our baby is born.”

“I have no doubt of that, my love,” She said softly caressing his cheek, “However, if we don’t move soon, I’m going to fall asleep on the stairs.” 

Cullen chuckled softly as they took up their former walking positions and slowly made it up the rest of the stairs. After they undressed Athena collapsed into bed too exhausted to have proper pillow placement. Cullen shook his head at her as he walked to the bed to join her, “Athena, don’t forget your pillows.”

“Don’t care,” was the muffled response of Duchess’ cheek pressed into her pillow.

“You’ll care in the morning,” Curly warned. 

Athena huffed and adjusted her pillows. Once she seemed settled Cullen started to rub her back. Athena’s muffled moan of relief said that he was doing a fantastic job and that is how she fell asleep. Cullen laid on his side and draped an arm over Athena’s expanded belly which was promptly kicked several times. Smiling, he agreed with his wife that their baby seemed very strong indeed.


	51. Chapter 51

Day by day Cullen grew stronger and the baby grew bigger. With Cullen back to work Athena usually had to join him for lunch. As she slowly walked across the walkway to Curly’s office, the door opened and a messenger came running out and barreled into her. If she hadn’t been walking close to the wall, she would have been knocked down.

Cullen was standing in the doorway and saw what transpired. He shouted at the messenger to look where they were going as he ran to his wife. When he reached her, he was concerned, “Are you all right?”

Athena rubbed her belly where the messenger had crashed into her and smiled impishly at her husband, “I’ve taken worse bumps.” 

Standing free of the wall she stumbled. Cullen caught her, “I thought you said you were all right? I think it’s past time I move my office to the floor below our quarters.”

Athena nodded in agreement, grateful for his strong and supportive arms, “I tripped and that would be nice.”

With her husband’s arm wrapped around her waist they walked to Cullen’s office. Cullen didn’t release her until she was sitting in a chair with a pillow at her back. Mia came over to gently hug her, “It’s so good to see you again, my dear.”

“When did you arrive?” Athena asked.

“About an hour ago. Rosalie sends her love,” Mia sat beside her.

“In your last letter, you said that she was coming with you,” Cullen was confused. 

“Her husband came back after she broke it off with Timson and she wanted to be with him,” Mia answered.

“I thought Rosalie’s husband had gone off to be with another?” Duchess’ turn to be confused.

“That’s what he told her because of how she acted around Timson. When Timson and Rosalie broke it off, her husband showed that he had been in South Reach the entire time. They made amends and seem quite happy,” Mia explained as the servants brought in lunch. 

Cullen prepared a plate for himself and he offered to make one for his wife. Athena shook her head at him. He knew she hadn’t been up for breakfast, “Why not?”

“Because I just had breakfast an hour ago,” Athena answered. Cullen thought he detected a hint of frustration in his wife’s voice and he wondered why, but didn’t want to question her in front of his sister.

“You aren’t up with the sunrise anymore?” Mia was surprised.

Athena blushed in embarrassment as Cullen explained, “She hasn’t been able to get a decent night’s sleep in weeks.”

“That, unfortunately, is not going to change. Have you thought of what you’ll name the little one?” Mia pried.

“We haven’t really discussed it yet,” Athena responded so Cullen could eat and then got out of her chair so she could get a drink.

Cullen stopped eating to say, “I could have done that for you.”

“I was uncomfortable anyway,” Athena said softly as she walked around the room with her glass of water.

“How much longer?” Mia asked sympathetically.

“About a month,” Athena walked back over to her chair to sit.

“Excited?”

“Incredibly,” Cullen put an arm around his wife and took her glass from her to sit it on the table.

“We could start discussing names now,” Athena offered.

“Shouldn’t that be a conversation you two should have in private?” Mia chuckled.

“I’ll forget,” Athena blushed.

“What are your thoughts?” Cullen asked his wife, smiling at her.

“I was thinking Duncan for a boy and Rein for a girl,” Athena answered.

“I was thinking Letrona for a girl and Liam for a boy,” Cullen watched his wife rub her large belly.

“Rein is a beautiful name. Where did you come across that one?” Mia’s curiosity got the better of her.

“I saw it written on a stone in Redcliffe,” Athena replied and looked to her husband, “which names do we use?”

“You need first and middle names…” Mia reminded them.

“I prefer Liam,” Athena said quietly and then gasped as the baby kicked a sensitive spot.

“And I prefer Rein,” Cullen placed a hand on her belly and started to rub it gently.

“Well, it sounds as though the baby will have a name when it decides to join us,” Mia smiled at them and quietly said goodbye which was returned by our lovers as she left. 

Athena had stood to give Curly’s sister a hug. Cullen bent down to kiss her. He wrapped his arms around his wife, pulling Athena close so her rounded belly was touching his muscular one. The baby protested with a kick causing its father to laugh and say, “You will need to get used to this, little one, because your mother is the loveliest woman in all of Thedas, and I’m not going to stop kissing her.”

Tears of joy sprang to Athena’s violet eyes and whispered, “Thank you.”

“It’s true,” he whispered back and kissed her again. As the kiss ended, he groaned, “As much as I would love to spend the rest of the day with you, I have a meeting with Darius in a few minutes.”

“I think I’ll go for a walk before returning to the main hall,” Athena played with the fur lining of Curly’s coat. Which he found odd.

“Is there something wrong?”

“I’m just restless. There’s nothing to worry about,” Athena smiled up at her husband.

“If you’re sure…” Cullen remarked softly, trying to see how he could re-work his schedule so he could be with Duchess. There had been a hint of weariness in her voice that worried him.

Athena watched the wheels turn in Curly’s head and ordered, “Cullen, stop worrying.”

He playfully narrowed his eyes at her and flatly stated, “No.”

“Insubordination from my Commander?!” Athena was quick to pick up on his playful vibe and returned in kind.

“Yes,” Curly pulled Duchess tighter against him and kissed her deeply. After the kiss ended his tone softened, “I worry about you because I love you.”

“I know. I love you, too,” Athena smiled up at him and they kissed again. Which Darius walked in on.

“For the love of the Maker, do you two ever stop?!” Darius exclaimed.

“Do you ever knock?” Cullen was irritated that their kiss had been interrupted.

“This meeting has been planned for days and I’m on time too,” Darius defended himself.

“You haven’t been on time?” Athena found this curious as Darius had repeatedly teased Curly for being late.

“He’s been spending far too much time with your cousin,” Cullen informed her.

“Considering I’m losing my love in a couple months. Yes, I would like to spend as much time with him as possible.” Darius complained.

“Dorian is leaving?” Athena questioned. This was news to her.

“He didn’t tell you?!” Darius was quite upset by this.

“At the Exalted Council I walked in on a party celebrating his Magistership… Have I really become that unapproachable?” Athena wondered aloud.

“He should have told you. I thought he had… I am so sorry,” Darius was very contrite and very angry with Sparkler.

“How long have you known?” Cullen asked Darius, watching his wife carefully. He knew the news had hurt her.

“He’s been talking about going back since the Exalted Council, but this morning he started making plans,” Darius told them.

“I now have a destination for my walk,” Athena kissed her husband goodbye and said goodbye to Darius.

As Athena left, Darius inquired of Curly, “Should we put this off until tomorrow?”

Athena heard Cullen say no as she closed the door behind her. She walked slowly to the library and sighed in frustration when she saw that Dorian wasn’t there. Duchess made her way to the rookery to see if Leliana knew where she could find Sparkler. Leliana motioned that Athena should sit, “This is a surprise. What can I help with?”

“You wouldn’t happen to know where Dorian is, would you?” Athena sat and rubbed her belly.

“He hasn’t been in the library. Have you checked the tavern?” Leliana watched Duchess carefully, she seemed not herself, and Nightingale couldn’t figure out why.

Athena sighed, frustrated with herself, “That should have been the first place I looked.”

As Duchess stood to leave, Leliana offered, “If you would like, I can have someone else find Dorian and have him meet you?”

“No, I’ll find him.” Athena made her way down the stairs, through the library, down to the main hall and out of the keep to go to the tavern. By the time she reached the tavern, she was out of breath. She took a moment to be able to breathe normally before entering.

I saw her enter and found it very odd. When she made her way over to the bar I had to ask, “Duchess, what are you doing here?”

“Looking for my cousin,” Athena responded and then she was backed into, almost causing her to fall. Thankfully, she had the where withal to grab the stool in front of her.

“When I saw him at lunch he said that he was going to the garden to think,” I informed her.

“The garden?” Athena’s tone said that she did not like that answer at all.

“That’s what he said… Is everything all right?” Usually she wouldn’t be irritated by a simple answer.

“Everything’s fine, Varric. I’m just tired and I need to talk to him about something,” Athena half smiled at me.

“Why don’t you go to your quarters and I’ll get Sparkler?” I suggested.

“It’s okay. I’ve being feeling restless lately, I don’t mind.” Athena said as she left. 

I watched her leave and it seemed as though with each step she took, she got slower and slower. I debated about telling Curly, and decided to tell him after I finished my ale.

Duchess somehow managed to get through the main hall and into the garden without being stopped, which she was grateful for. As she walked around the garden, there was no sign of Sparkler. Sighing with frustration and weariness she left and headed toward her quarters, on the off chance Dorian would be there. 

He wasn’t, but Duchess desperately needed a break as her legs felt like they were on fire and her back was aching. She sat on the settee for a few minutes, and groaned as she got up. Slowly making her way down to the main hall. Athena saw Josephine and asked if she knew where Dorian was.

“I believe he’s taken up the Commander’s former occupation of pacing the battlements,” Josephine answered, “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, just tired,” Athena offered her a wan smile and was on her way. She was silently cursing Sparkler and now needing to walk the battlements. She thought ruefully, I wanted a walk. However, walking all over Skyhold was not what I had in mind.

Athena stopped in the courtyard to do a slow turn to see if she could find Dorian up on the battlements. She found him pacing in front of the mage tower. With a groan, she set off to climb the stairs to the battlements and walk the majority of them until she reached him. 

When Sparkler saw her he blushed, “How did you find me?”

“After walking most of Skyhold, Josie told me that you were pacing the battlements,” Athena gingerly rested her aching back on the battlement wall.

Dorian sighed despondently, “You know then.” 

“I should have heard it from you,” Athena reprimanded her cousin.

“Yes, you should have. Last night I received proof that my father was definitely assassinated. After the baby is born, I need to go home,” Dorian explained.

“I understand that, but why didn’t you come to me?”

“You have a husband who just got back to work and are expecting a child. You deserve the life you’re building with the Commander. I don’t want you worrying about me. I will be in touch. You are my favorite cousin, after all.” Dorian smirked at her.

“I’m your only cousin. Is there something I can do to help?” That’s Duchess, always trying to help.

“Yes, give birth to a healthy baby, enjoy your life, and beat your husband at chess,” Dorian put extra sparkle in his smile.

Athena chuckled despite herself, “You’re horrible, you know that? That isn’t what I meant.”

“I know… If the truth needs to be told I’m uncertain as to what you can do to help,” Sparkler shrugged, “You will be the first to know if I do.”

“Thank you,” Athena smiled at her cousin, “Should we go see what our loves are up to?”

Sparkler and Duchess walked the battlements, arm in arm. They reached the first set of stairs and descended them. At the bottom Dorian stopped so Athena could rest a bit. As they walked over to the sparring ring, Sparkler loudly complained, “Could your husband not bruise my love for the rest of the time I’m here?”

Athena chuckled softly, which was cut short by the baby punching her. As she rubbed the now sore spot, Curly remarked as they tested their strength against each other, “Maybe you shouldn’t have angered your love to the point of violence.”

Sparkler gasped, “I would never!” And then he looked at Duchess and said sadly, “You found out from Darius.”

“He thought I already knew,” Athena softly spoke.

“I am very sorry,” Dorian felt it necessary to apologize again.

“It’s all right, Dorian,” Athena winced as the ache in her back turned into a knot. Not wanting to worry anyone she softened her voice even more, “I think I’m going to go inside.”

“Are you all right?” Sparkler asked.

“I’m just tired,” Athena smiled wanly at her cousin, rubbing at the base of her back to release the tension there.

As Duchess started to walk away, I approached the sparring ring and found it necessary to interrogate Sparkler, “Where did Duchess find you?”

“The battlements,” Dorian had the grace to blush.

“So, Duchess had to walk through most of Skyhold to find you?” I inquired, which caught Curly’s attention.

“Varric,” Athena groaned, still walking away from us.

Cullen and Darius pulled apart. Darius still looked as though he wanted to murder someone. Cullen had expected to see his wife close by, and had a momentary panic when he couldn’t find her. When he did locate her, she was bracing herself against the wall of the keep at the bottom of the stairs and he mumbled, “She is the most stubborn person I know.”

“I had every intention of finding Athena and telling her. As usual, she found me first,” Dorian defended himself as we watched Curly walk over to Duchess.

Cullen put an arm around Athena’s waist and told her, “I’m carrying you.”

“Cullen…” Athena trailed off as he picked her up.

“Shh, rest,” Cullen softly ordered, easily carrying his wife up the stairs, into the keep, and to their quarters. After he laid Athena gently on the bed, he took off her shoes and covered her. He kissed her gently on the forehead to make certain that Duchess was asleep before he left.

Walking swiftly through the keep, he was stopped by Ruffles, “Is the Inquisitor all right?”

“She pushed herself too far today. She should be fine with some rest,” Cullen answered, “I want to have my office moved to beneath our quarters.”

“I can have the workers start first thing in the morning,” Josephine offered.

“I want it done as soon as possible,” Cullen gently refused and went off to find Darius and some soldiers to get his office moved.  
Curly found Darius first and informed him what he wanted to do. Darius told him, “Go back to your wife. The soldiers and I will get your office moved in short order.”

Cullen was anxious to get back to Duchess, so he let Darius handle the move. As Curly came to his soon to be new office, he was surprised to hear Duchess’ lilting laughter floating down through the open door but he smiled anyway. When he reached the top of the stairs to their quarters, he heard Athena gasp and chastise me (of all things,) “Varric, you shouldn’t make me laugh so hard.”

“All I did was tell the story. Your cousin is the one who almost fell off the tower,” I responded.

“You told the story with several embellishments and I did not almost fall off,” Sparkler griped.

“So you did fall off then?” I asked, grinning.

“Yes,” Dorian grumbled. Mia, Athena, and I laughed. 

Unfortunately, Duchess’ laughter was cut short by a sharp kick from the little one growing inside her, causing her to wince and rub the spot where the kick happened. Cullen sat beside her, trying not to be overly concerned. She smiled impishly at him, “You should order our child to not kick my ribs.”

We laughed. Cullen chuckled, “You are the Inquisitor and their mother. I think they will listen to you more.”

“I’ve tried,” Athena pouted playfully.

“The babe takes after their mother,” Sparkler teased.

“I’ll have you know that I’ve always been an excellent listener!” Athena exclaimed. Cullen raised an eyebrow at her as the rest of us laughed. Blushing, she murmured, “I’m just not always very good at obeying.” 

Her husband laughed and kissed her. When the kiss ended, Cullen said, “After having to chase Dorian through most of Skyhold, Athena really should be resting.”

We said our goodbyes and when the last of us left, Cullen caressed Athena’s cheek, “When I left here, you were asleep...”

“I woke needing to use the garderobe. When I came out Dorian, Varric, and Mia were waiting,” Athena smiled at him. 

“How are you feeling?”

“Sore. I should have had someone else look for Dorian,” Athena admitted. He got up to get undressed and Duchess used the garderobe.

Curly took a lot less time than his wife and was waiting for her in bed when she came out, smiling at her he remarked softly, “There’s my lovely wife.”

“Your “lovely” wife feels like she’s the size of a bronto,” Athena complained, climbing in to bed beside him.

“You don’t feel or look like a bronto to me.” Cullen gently assured, “You are a beautiful woman that will be giving birth to a beautiful child in a month.”

Athena kissed him, “That’s very sweet, but I still feel like I’m the size of a bronto."

“The only one that can make that claim is Varric,” Cullen teased (thanks, Curly.) Athena chuckled and they gently made love before they fell asleep. 

Cullen woke in the middle of the night to an insistent tapping on his shoulder, thinking it was his wife, his voice cracked with sleep when he spoke, “Athena? What do you need?”

Not receiving a response, he opened his eyes and found Duchess fast asleep. He felt something run down his arm from his shoulder. Curly quickly rolled to his back and reached for his sword beside the bed, and then the crack in the ceiling grew, releasing a deluge of water right in his face. Cullen spluttered and then cursed, “Andraste’s knicker weasels!”

He jumped out of bed and quickly roused his wife, “Darling, you need to get up, the roof is leaking!”

Athena groaned at being shook, even though Cullen was trying to be gentle. She started to open her eyes, “What?”

“The roof is leaking, and I’d rather not have you sleep in a wet bed.” Cullen helped his wife sit up as she was still half asleep.

“How do you know that the roof is leaking?” Athena asked.

“I was woken by water dripping on my shoulder, and then was given a bath by where it’s leaking,” Cullen handed Duchess her robe and tried to figure out where they were going to sleep for the night.

Athena put on her robe and Cullen went in to the storage closet to find a container that would catch the water so the bed would stop being soaked… At least that’s what he hoped. The storage closet was a mess, which frustrated him even more. As he was fumbling around something whacked him on the arm and he swore. Finally finding what he was looking for he came out and placed a barrel on the floor after he moved their bed, “That closet needs cleaned out.”

“I’ve never been in there,” Athena took hold of her husband’s hand, now curious to know what had been stored in the closet.

“Then how….” Cullen sighed and sheathed his sword and strapped the belt on to take it with him, “Never mind, that’s a mystery for another day. How are you feeling?”

“Tired, you did just wake me up,” Athena reminded him in a light tone.

“That’s not…” Cullen paused and rubbed his neck, “Are you still sore? Are you up for some walking?”

“Cullen, right now, being sore is constant,” She smiled gently at him, “I think I can manage a walk.”

“Good,” Curly said in relief as they left their quarters to see what, if anything was moved from Cullen’s office. Everything had been moved except the bed. 

“That was quick,” Athena marveled at how fast the soldiers had moved Curly’s office.

“Unfortunately it looks as though they ran out of time to move everything,” Cullen remarked.

They walked quietly through the keep, hand in hand. Cullen deep in thought and worried as to what condition his former office was in. Was the bed still there in some form? Would Athena be able to get to it if it was? He also wanted to wake the workers and have them start on the roof immediately. Athena’s tugging on his hand broke him out of his reverie as they reached the atrium, “What’s wrong?”

Duchess shook her head at him, if she didn’t have to use the garderobe, she would have found Curly’s furrowed brow and deep in thought look to be adorable. So adorable that she wouldn’t have been able to resist teasing him about it. But Athena had to go with the direct approach, “Your child demands that I use the garderobe.”

Cullen chuckled softly and released her, electing to wait for her since it was the middle of the night and still raining. When she came out they continued their walk to Curly’s former office. Because of the pitch blackness of the room, Athena used her magic to light it. The room was empty.

Cullen glanced at the ladder and back at Duchess, “I hope the bed is still up there.”

“I’m not climbing that ladder,” Athena stated.

“I wouldn’t want you to. If it’s still up there, I’m going to throw down the bedding and mattress. Please stay away from the ladder.”

Athena used her magic to light the upstairs as well and Curly climbed the ladder. Once he was up there, Duchess moved to the left of it and lowered herself to sit with her aching back pressed against the wall. She chuckled as she heard Cullen grumble about the mess, which was rewarded with a kick from the baby. 

It took Cullen several minutes to clear a path as the bed had been partially taken apart before the soldiers called it for the night. He muttered in irritation about the roof leaking again and was angry that it hadn’t been properly fixed the first time it leaked. Cullen promised himself, as he rolled up the feather mattress, that at first light he would be supervising the workers fixing the roof. With the mattress tied together with a piece of string he found in the mess, he called down to Duchess to make sure she was out of the way. 

Curly thought he heard his wife respond so he loosed the mattress through the ladder entry and waited to hear it fall over before tossing the bedding down. Right before he started to climb down the ladder, the light Athena had created went out. Curly found that strange, and called down to her again, “Athena, are you all right?”

Cullen didn’t receive a response and started to worry. He rushed down the ladder, hurriedly kicking the sheets, pillows and stuff out of the way. Tripping over the stuff he had previously kicked, Curly swore as he opened two of the doors to his office in the hopes of letting some light in. It didn’t help, so Cullen went to open the third door and nudged something with his foot. As he was about to push whatever it was out of his way, he heard Duchess gasp. Realizing that she was the object in his path to the door he hunkered down beside her, “Athena?”

Athena opened her violet eyes to see fear dissipating to concern in her husband’s brown eyes. She thought he was worried over her gasp, so she took his hand and placed it where the baby was using her for a punching dummy. Cullen smiled and caressed the spot but Duchess couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still worried, “Cullen, is something wrong?”

“Your magic light went out. When I called down, you didn’t answer and I didn’t know if something happened where you couldn’t respond… It seems rather foolish now.” Cullen smiled at her.

“I fell asleep. It’s not foolish at all,” Athena bent forward to kiss him. When the kiss ended she asked, “Are we sleeping on the floor?”

“In a way… I’m surprised you slept through all the noise I was making,” Now that he knew Athena was fine, Cullen set to untying the mattress and laying it flat. 

Athena lit the room with her magic and shrugged at her husband’s comment, “Do you want me to help?”

“You are helping.” Cullen put the blankets and pillows on the mattress and then closed the doors he opened earlier.

“I’m sitting here, that’s decidedly not helping.”

“You are lighting the room, that’s more than enough help.” He assured her, “plus, I’m done.”

Athena struggled to stand until Cullen helped her. He also helped her to get down again and with weary sighs they fell asleep holding each other.

**

The soldiers that went to Honnleath had been trickling back, on this day the wounded and dead returned. Cullen took several hours in checking on the injured and preparing services for those that died. Darius walked along with him, “How is the Inquisitor?”

“Fine. She was sleeping when I left,” Cullen responded.

“Has there been word on when you will return to your quarters?”

“The foreman said by the end of the week,” Curly sighed irritably.

Darius understood his commander’s displeasure, “It’s been over a sennight since the roof started leaking. Why haven’t you set up a temporary office in the atrium?”

“Athena’s told me that she doesn’t mind the walk. I also happen to agree with her that a second move would confuse others,” Cullen provided a drink for an injured soldier.

Darius shook his head in amazement, “There aren’t too many commanders that would do that.”

“Do what?” Cullen found Darius’ commentary odd as he had provided drinks for many a wounded soldier.

“Nothing, just being reminded as to why I’m so proud to be part of the Inquisition and your second.”

Curly gave him an odd look and shook his head, “You’re fortunate that I’m anxious to get back to my wife, or you and I would be having a very long conversation.”

Darius chuckled, “Nothing a sparring match won’t cure. Let’s get back to work.”

They made the rest of the rounds in companionable silence. As they were about to part ways a dark haired messenger approached them, “Forgive me, I was looking for Sister Leliana?”

Cullen turned his attention to the messenger, “Leliana should be either in the main hall or in the rookery. Darius can escort you.”

“Thanks, Commander,” Darius said sarcastically and under his breath so only Curly could hear him.

“You forget who I need to get back to,” Cullen smirked.

“And I have no one?”

“I didn’t know Dorian was with child. I can’t wait to tell Athena,” Curly joked.

“Tomorrow you will pay….” Darius spluttered. Cullen chuckled as he left.

“Who was that?” The messenger inquired.

“Commander Cullen,” Darius grumbled.

“He tolerates you talking back to him like that?” The messenger was shocked.

“He’s a good man… Some of the time,” Darius groused. 

Cullen let out a short bark of laughter as he mounted the stairs to go to the battlements and his temporary quarters. When he got there he saw Duchess talking to the foreman. Athena beamed at him, “The foreman said that the roof has been fixed.”

“When we spoke yesterday, you had said that the roof wouldn’t be complete until the end of the week?” Cullen directed his question at the foreman.

“When you had asked, I did not have the chance to investigate the seal for myself. It is now completely dry, and should not leak,” the foreman explained.

Athena dismissed the foreman with her thanks and watched her husband pace, “I thought you would be thrilled with this news.”

“I am...I,” Cullen sighed as he stopped pacing to walk over to Duchess and take her hand, “the change in news is just so sudden. It… worries me a little.”

“Why don’t we go see for ourselves? If it’s not up to your standards, challenge the foreman to a sparring match,” She impishly smiled at him.

Cullen chuckled at Athena’s tease, “I don’t know anything about fixing roofs.”

“Fixing roofs wasn’t part of the Templar training?”

“Decidedly not,” Cullen pulled Athena tight against him and seductively lowered his voice, “I’d rather spar with you.”

“Would you now? I fear I’m a bit out of shape at the moment,” Athena teased, loving the sultry glint in her husband’s eyes.

“That’s not what I meant,” Cullen’s mouth was a breath away from hers.

“I know,” Duchess breathed out as Curly kissed her passionately. Athena broke off the kiss with a gasp.

Cullen was immediately concerned, “Athena?”

“A slight birth pang, it’s nothing to worry over,” Athena smiled up at him.

“Isn’t it a bit early for that?”

“No, they’ll most likely increase in frequency,” She informed him, hoping to allay the worry she saw in his eyes, “Shall we go investigate our quarters?”

Cullen smiled at her and they walked arm and arm to their quarters to see if the foreman was telling the truth.

**

Athena woke with the baby kicking and elbowing up a storm. Mia smiled at her and asked if she was hungry. Athena nodded yes. Mia filled up a tray for her and brought it to the bed where Athena was sitting patiently. Mia brought a chair over and sat beside the bed, “How are you feeling?”

“Sore, I’m ready to have my body back,” Athena answered digging in to her food.

Mia kept up a light conversation while Athena ate, mostly talking of what was happening in South Reach. Cullen’s brother was engaged to be married. The heather was in bloom.

After eating, Athena got up to go to the garderobe. While she was there Mia cleaned off the tray and looked for a servant to take away the dirty dishes. When she came back she saw that Duchess wasn’t in bed, a quick glance to the east balcony showed Athena with a blanket wrapped around her. Mia went to stand beside her, “It is a beautiful view.”

Athena smiled, “It is,” and then she groaned because the baby decided to kick her, hard. Rubbing the spot Athena continued, “When I was a girl my mother had given me books of the Frostback Mountains… I would fantasize about living in a castle deep in the mountains, where no one could keep me prisoner or hurt me.”

“Sounds as though that fantasy came true,” Mia chuckled.

Athena laughed, “I guess it did…” pausing, she grew serious, “The only difference was, in my childhood fantasy no one loved me. The reality turned out so much better.”

Mia had tears in her eyes and hugged her, “Oh, Athena.”

Cullen walked up behind them, hesitating to do or say anything because he didn’t want to startle them. So he braced his shoulder on the doorway with his arms and ankles crossed, listening to his sister and wife talk.

“Why are you crying?” Athena was bewildered by Mia’s reaction to her confession.

“Because I cannot imagine anyone not loving you. You are so kind and caring, willing to help people that think they don’t deserve it. Cullen had told me how afraid he was of losing you after he told you about what happened at Fereldan’s circle, and how you were more upset about how the mages treated him than about how he treated the ones he came in contact with after,” Mia said softly.

Athena hid a smirk, impatient to tease Cullen, but responded to Mia seriously, “I always thought that with power comes responsibility. The problem is, there are those that are never content with what they have, they always want more. We blame demons and abominations for desiring more, and yet we do it ourselves, and we fail to see the repercussions of it until it is far too late. The reason I became a healer was because I never wanted to hurt anyone again. I still don’t like to use my powers to fight. I understand the desperation of feeling like a caged animal in a gilded cage, but they hurt so many, and all their actions did was cause every other mage that lived in a circle to be hurt. Torture is never an answer.”

“You’ve seen it before haven’t you?” Mia’s voice was quiet.

“Not like what Cullen went through… But, yes,” Athena gasped and placed her hand underneath her belly, losing the blanket.

“Athena?” Cullen asked softly to not startle her and cause her more discomfort. Mia watched her sister in law, concerned. 

Athena answered her husband, “Your child head butted me.”

“My child is it?” He cocked an eyebrow as he wrapped the blanket around his wife.

“When it does things like that, yes,” Athena teased, rubbing her belly.

“I don’t go around head butting people,” Cullen pretended to be indignant as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Dorian and Darius tell of a different story,” Duchess turned in her husband’s loving embrace to gaze up at him.

“That was sparring and Darius deserved it,” Cullen sounded miffed, “It’s late, you should be sleeping.”

Athena looked over at Mia with a look that said this is what I deal with on a daily basis. Mia chuckled and said goodnight to our lovers. As Mia was leaving Duchess answered, “If our child would let me sleep for more than a couple hours, I would be asleep.”

“Love, if you’re tired, why are you out here?”

“I wanted to see the mountains bathed in moonlight,” Athena’s voice was soft, wistful.

“Their beauty pales in comparison next to you,” Cullen almost whispered, bending down for a kiss.

“Flirt,” She stated as she waited for the kiss of her love.

“I’m grateful for your poor choice in flirts,” he whispered and then slowly kissed her. Lifting Athena in his arms Cullen strode to their bed and he laid his wife down upon it. 

Cullen undressed first, and then helped Athena undress. When not a stitch of clothing was left on either of them, Cullen had Duchess lay on her side and he caressed her large belly, kissing it, caressed her legs, kissing them, rubbed her feet, kissed her feet, and so on. As he gently massaged the tightness out of her belly and back Athena moaned in relief, which made Cullen pause.

Athena whispered, “Don’t stop.”

Cullen smiled and kissed her, and they gently made love until they fell asleep. Athena was up an hour later because the baby was kicking again and she had to use the garderobe. When she came out she saw that Cullen had lit a candle, he said, “You should have woke me.”

Athena wasn’t ready to lay back down yet so she walked around with the heel of her palm pressed into her aching back, “I just woke up a couple minutes ago.”

“This morning you told me that you felt as though you could sleep for days,” He reminded her as he got out of bed and walked over to her.

“Our child has decided that now is when it would like to play,” Athena griped. 

“You should still be trying to rest.”

“Cullen, I know this is difficult to understand, but I can’t go back to bed just yet. It’s not that I don’t want to, I just can’t,” Athena sighed wearily, lightly scratching at the too taut skin of her belly.

Cullen wrapped his arms around her and felt how tense she was, “Then will you at least sit on the couch with me?”

Athena chuckled, “You don’t have to stay up with me. You need your rest too.”

“I want to,” Cullen took her hand and led her to the couch.

Once they were seated Athena asked, “How many did we lose in Honnleath?”

“We were fortunate, we only lost a few and the number of injured is far below what I expected,” Cullen answered.

“Who did we lose?” She was already fighting tears.

“Athena, don’t do this, not tonight. If you feel up to it tomorrow, you can join me as I talk to their families here, but I won’t give you another reason to not be able to sleep.” He gently put an arm around her and pulled her close.

Athena dropped the subject because she knew this was one battle Cullen wouldn’t give in on, so they sat in silence for a few minutes. It was so quiet Cullen started thinking that she had fallen asleep, until Athena asked, “How much did you hear of Mia and I talking?”

“Too much,” he groused.

Athena laughed at his answer and then after her laughter died down, “You were really afraid that you would lose me?”

Cullen blushed, “I was.”

“Why?”

“It’s not every day that you find out a person you may have feelings for had been tortured to the point of nearly losing their mind, instead of investigating rumored abuses, ignoring them because the rumors were from mages, and couldn’t control…” He stopped not wanting to continue.

Athena kissed him and whispered, “You never had to fear losing me. I was already in love with you.”

Cullen shook his head in awe at her, “I am incredibly blessed to be in love with you,” Athena yawned interrupting him, “Back to bed with you.” Cullen picked her up and carried her to bed.

Cullen slept. Athena tried, but every time she would lay down the baby would start kicking, elbowing, and head butting. So, she got a dwarven lamp, a book, and sat on the couch to read. Where she eventually fell asleep.

Cullen woke with a start because of his nightmares and groaned as he felt the empty spot where his wife should be. Sitting up and shaking off the last vestiges of his nightmares, he looked out at the balconies. Athena wasn’t on either one. Maybe she went to the garderobe, he thought. As he got dressed Curly listened for sounds coming from there and kept an eye on the door. 

He heard something fall to the floor in front of the couch. He found Athena with a book laid open on her belly and the dwarven lamp rolling underneath the couch. Cullen sighed, closing the book, he put it to the side, and carried his wife back to bed. He then went down and waited for the servants to bring breakfast in, not wanting them to wake his wife. There was a soft knock at the door, which he opened to see Nightingale with a tray of food.

“Commander,” Leliana smiled.

“What ever business you have for Athena can wait,” Cullen took the tray from her.

“I come as a friend this morning, nothing more,” Leliana said softly as they walked up the stairs.

He breathed a sigh of relief, “I have no idea when she got to sleep last night. I found her sleeping on the couch when I woke.”

“That couldn’t have been comfortable for her,” Leliana whispered as to not disturb the one still sleeping. Cullen shrugged in answer as he sat down the breakfast tray. And they walked out to the balcony so they didn’t have to whisper. 

“There was a messenger looking for you yesterday."

“Yes, it was a message from some old acquaintances. Do you remember Wynne?”

“I do. There was a time when she and Irving were almost inseparable,” Cullen involuntarily tensed as memories from that time weren’t of the fond variety.

“The message was from her son and his lover,” Leliana said as Cullen glanced back in to check on Athena because he thought he heard her moan.

“What did they want?”

“They heard of your success in freeing yourself from lyrium,” Leliana answered.

“Athena had told me of a slower way to not use lyrium. I wish I had listened to her,” Cullen replied softly, almost as if he hadn’t heard Nightingale.

“Oh?”

“The dreams are more intense now…” Cullen trailed off not wanting to admit to more.

“If the dreams are more intense that means everything else is as well. Are you letting Athena help you?” Leliana inquired.

“When she’s able to.” Cullen watched his wife shift in her sleep, thinking that he was a burden on her just like the anchor had been.

“And that means?”

“It means I don’t wake her for a headache.” He grumbled, shooting Nightingale a look that said she was prying too much.

“She needs you. More than she may admit even to herself. You think she is restless and sleep deprived now? You should have seen her while you were in Honnleath. I doubt she slept more than an hour each night. She knew you were ill when you left, and it only added to her worry.

“It was my error in sending Varric with you because he has a knack for getting Athena to smile against her will. And maybe if I had sent Dorian instead, you wouldn’t have been injured,” Leliana paused, “With the baby expected soon, I’m going to do everything I can to keep these last weeks as open as possible for her. So, expect her to want to spend more time with you.”

“Darius and I have already discussed it,” Cullen assured her. “You had said that she wasn’t worse than me?”

“She wasn’t, but that doesn’t mean that she didn’t pace. She couldn’t be still, and it had nothing to do with the baby.” Leliana answered, “The only thing that the baby did was keep her from pacing for hours on end like you would do.”

Athena moaned and shifted again. Cullen walked to stand in the doorway hearing her moan. Athena shifted again and rubbed her belly. Even though Cullen was literally across the large room he could see what looked like an elbow trying to push its way out. Athena moaned again and Curly walked over to the bed and started to gently rub his wife’s back. She groaned as he hit a sore spot. Cullen gently massaged it away and continued to work on her lower back.

Leliana walked over to Cullen and whispered, “I invited Josie and Bull as well.”

Cullen nodded that he heard her but his full attention was on his wife as she had moaned and tensed again. Athena rolled to her back and arched it a little, her back protesting the weight she was placing on it. Cullen placed a pillow underneath the arch and half smiled as his wife sighed in relief. 

Athena reached out for her husband’s hand and groaned, rasping out in a voice still filled with sleep, “Why does everything hurt?”

Cullen gently held her hand, “Because you had a sleepless night.”

“How did you know?” Athena opened her violet eyes.

“I found you on the couch using a book for a blanket,” he placed his free hand on her belly and was rewarded with a kick. Athena winced at the kick. Cullen smiled sympathetically, “You weren’t teasing when you said everything hurt.”

Athena shook her head as she moved to sit up and get out of bed. Cullen helped her up, assuming, quite correctly, that she had to use the garderobe. When she was up Cullen took his seat at the table. While she was in the water closet Bull and Ruffles knocked. Leliana let them in, taking one look at how heavily Josephine was leaning on Tiny, she asked, “Are you sure you’re up to this?”

“Yes,” Ruffles whispered. 

Bull growled low in his throat, thinking that his wife should be in bed. Athena heard the growl as she came out of the water closet, “That growl sounds familiar.”

“I do not sound like Bull,” Cullen grumbled as he saw that his wife had a smirk playing at her lips.

Duchess walked over and kissed him, “It’s all in the tone, dear,” She turned to greet her guests, and seeing how pale Ruffles looked, chastised her, “Josie, you should still be in bed.”

“It’s just a stomach illness. I’ll be fine,” Ruffles rasped out as Bull helped her to a seat.

“If you would rest, I’d agree with you,” Athena tensed as her lower back decided to complain about standing. Curly noticed and pulled her down on his lap, and without anyone being the wiser started massaging his wife’s lower back.

Ruffles sighed, “My family is arriving today.”

“Wasn’t your mother just here for the wedding?” Cullen questioned.

“She had stopped in Val Royeaux for business and I made the mistake of telling her that I’ve been ill,” Josie answered as Tiny pulled off the lid for breakfast. Ruffles gagged and ran to the garderobe.

Bull grumbled, “Josephine has been saying that she needs a new wardrobe. I don’t understand why clothing matters so much to her.”

“Because she doesn’t want to walk around naked?” Leliana quipped. She knew the reason Ruffles was pestering for a new wardrobe was because Tiny had destroyed most of it.

“I haven’t destroyed all of it. When Cullen destroys the boss’s clothes she doesn’t complain,” Bull reminded everyone amidst chuckles from the ladies and a blush from Curly.

“I had the luxury of being able to borrow Cullen’s shirts. In the years I’ve known you, I’ve only seen you where a shirt twice.” Athena remarked lightly.

“You could still borrow them if you wish,” Cullen assured her.

“I doubt they would fit at the moment. I do miss it though…” Athena bit her lip. She blushed, and lowered her voice to a whisper, “They smelled like you.”

“You certainly look better in them than I do,” Curly said softly as Ruffles joined everyone at the table.

Athena excused herself and slowly stood from sitting on Cullen’s lap as she didn’t want to bump anything with her large belly and walked away with her hand pressing into her back.

As Cullen ate, he watched his restless wife move about the room and saw her pause at the bookshelves. When he went to Athena’s side, he noted that she was gripping a bookshelf tightly. Without a word Curly wrapped his arms loosely around her and whispered things in her ear to distract her until the tightness had passed. When the tension had left her body, she sagged a little. Cullen wrapped his arms tighter around Athena to keep her from falling. He whispered, “You should go back to bed.”

Athena released the bookshelf and leaned back into her husband, “I’m not tired.”

“You shouldn’t have helped with moving so much stuff yesterday. Are you still sore?” Cullen gently chastised.

“It’s hard to tell the difference between soreness from yesterday and being with child.” Athena paused, “This isn’t anything new, love. Stop worrying.”

“The new thing is you having contractions,” Cullen said softly as Athena turned to look at him.

“Which is also normal.”

“I don’t like seeing you in pain,” He whispered emphatically.

“That part is going to get worse before it gets better,” Athena said softly. “Which you’ve seen.”

“I wasn’t in love with them,” he paused to kiss her, “I’m in love with you.”

“Are you saying that you don’t love Rosalie?” Athena teased.

“That’s different and you know it,” Curly grumbled.

“I don’t have any siblings,” She smirked.

“Wife,” Cullen growled.

Athena laughed softly, “In a few weeks, the contractions will stop.”

“I’m going to hold you to that. Now will you eat?”

Athena laughed and nodded. They walked back to the table to enjoy breakfast. When they all had eaten their fill, Ruffles asked Nightingale, “You were captivated by a letter last night. Who was it from?”

“Some old acquaintances from Val Royeaux,” Leliana smiled.

“That answers where, not who, Red,” Bull teased.

Leliana chuckled, “Rhys and Evangeline.”

“Does Cole know?” Athena walked back from the garderobe.

“How did you know what they were talking about?” Cullen inquired as Athena sat beside him.

“I heard you and Leliana talking earlier. And the garderobe isn’t as sound proof as some would like to think it is.” She stretched her legs out in front of her and rubbed her belly. Cullen closed his eyes and groaned. 

Bull laughed, shaking the table and making Josephine groan, he was immediately contrite. “Sorry, Kadan. Either Cullen said something he didn’t want the boss to hear or he was under the impression the garderobe was sound proof.”

Athena chuckled, “He doesn’t have to worry on either one. I was in and out of sleep this morning so I didn’t get to hear the entire conversation; just the part about Wynne’s son. And as for the water closet that’s usually Varric or Dorian…”

“I don’t want to know,” Cullen groaned. 

“It’s nothing like that, they make bets when I go in to the garderobe and then they’re shocked that I heard them,” Athena stood to walk around some more. 

When I knocked on the door Duchess was the one that opened it, which surprised me, “Curly let you out of his sight for a minute? I didn’t think he could do that anymore.”

“Cullen is not that bad. Hello, Cole,” Athena chastised me, but she was grinning so I know she found it a little funny.

Cole nodded and smiled in response. We walked up the stairs to see a frowning Curly about to lay into me. I thought it would be in my best interest to explain myself, “I was just teasing, Curly. Duchess usually doesn’t get to answer the door.” 

Cullen sighed in frustration as he walked over to Athena, “I have work to do.”

“Going to the families of those we lost in Honnleath?” Athena’s smile faded. She never liked losing people.

Cullen nodded, “Were you still planning on coming with me?”

Athena shook her head, “I don’t think that would be wise.”

“I know it’s foolish to ask this, but try and get some rest?”

Athena chuckled, “I’ll try.”

“Good,” he kissed her, “I don’t know if I’ll be back for lunch today.”

“We’ll be fine, Cullen. I love you,” Athena softly stated.

“I love you, too,” Cullen whispered before he kissed her.

As everyone else left, Athena sat down beside Cole, “Leliana received a letter from Rhys and Evangeline.”

“Did they ask about me?” Cole sounded a bit unsure. It seemed as though he didn’t want to know.

“I don’t know.”

“I’m going to go talk with her,” Cole left. 

And that was when Athena dropped her guard, the discomfort she was feeling was etched upon her face. She closed her eyes and sighed. I shook my head, “You know, Duchess, it’s okay to let your guard down in front of your husband.”

“I look that bad?” She asked softly as she laid back on the corner of the couch and cradled her belly with her hand.

“Bad? Of course not,” I assured her, “but it’s plain to see that you feel as though you’ve been run over by a dragon.”

Athena chuckled and winced, “Ow. Varric, it hurts to laugh.”

“Far be it from me to support something Curly said. But you really should rest,” I told her.

“And here I found a reasonably uncomfortable spot,” Athena quipped.

“I believe the point of resting is so you feel comfortable.”

“Reasonably uncomfortable is better than very uncomfortable,” Athena tried to get up from the couch and failed, “I can’t get up.”

I chuckled and pulled her up so she could stand. Wobbling to the point of where she almost fell, Duchess reached out her hand to steady herself on the couch that was now behind her. Once she felt safe enough to stand still, she requested, “Will you check on Cole for me? I get the feeling I’m not going to be doing much of anything today.”

“Did you want me to get Curly?” I offered as we walked over to her bed.

“No, he needs to talk to the families of those we lost,” Athena sat on her bed and put her hand behind her, “I’m going to try to get some sleep.”

“Understood,” I left.

Athena sighed wearily as she laid down on the bed and rested her hand on her belly. Not receiving a response from the baby she smiled thinking that the baby was asleep and she drifted off to sleep.


	52. Chapter 52

Most of the meetings went as well as can be expected, the last one… decidedly not. After Cullen sympathetically informed the young lady of her sister dying, he was rewarded with an angry diatribe. “I’ve lost every member of my family to this Inquisition, all for the “greater good.” My life hasn’t been made better, it’s been made worse. The woman that supposedly can do something about that has locked herself away. I used to see the Inquisitor daily, now I see her not at all. She killed my sister by not being on the front lines.”

“I am the one that ordered the forces to fight in Honnleath. If you feel the need to blame someone, blame me,” Cullen filled the small room by taking a defensive stand, readying himself for an attack.

“You ordered them there to protect her, so it’s still her fault,” the woman growled.

“I ordered them there to protect the King of Fereldan. As the Divine’s peacekeeping force, it is our duty to help keep the peace. The Inquisitor had nothing to do with this,” Curly tried very hard to not get angry as he thought that the young woman was letting grief rule her.

“She still should have been there. Why wasn’t she?” The woman’s snide tone rankled him.

“You don’t know?” Cullen was incredulous and now quite irritated.

“I had heard that she was with child, but I have seen no proof of it,” the woman replied.

Cullen shook his head, it was not worth the fight as she was letting grief rule her. As he left he once again offered his condolences. Stalking over to the training dummies, Cullen punched one until it broke, and then he moved to the next one, trying to release all the rage he felt from the last conversation. He broke about four dummies before being interrupted.

Darius came over and saw the broken bits littering the grass, “That bad?”

“Yes,” Cullen growled, not looking at Darius as he sized up the next dummy.

“Do you need something sturdier than a dummy? The qunari is looking for a sparring partner,” Darius watched his commander smirk starkly.

“Thank you, Darius,” Curly clapped him on the back a little too hard and he sent Darius stumbling. Cullen’s smirk got wider as he saw that Tiny wasn’t happy either.

“Commander,” Bull nodded.

“Bull,” Cullen returned the nod.

“Bad day?” Bull readied himself to charge.

“Yes. You?” Curly readied himself as well.

“Yes,” they both charged at each other grappling, throwing elbows, headlocks, hip tosses, anything to get the anger they were feeling out. The fight lasted an hour before they called a draw. Out of the injuries we could see, Curly had a split lip and an eye that swelled shut. Bull didn’t look any better.

“Before you two go back to your wives, you should go to a healer,” I shouted.

They looked at each other and agreed with me (for once.) Gingerly, the two warriors got up from sitting with their backs against the sparring ring and went to one of the mage healers so their wives wouldn’t see the damage. Shaking hands they went their separate ways.

Cullen rushed through the keep to get to Athena. When he arrived in their quarters he saw that she was pacing and had tears in her eyes. “Athena, what’s wrong?”

“Cole is missing and I have been told that I am not needed in the search,” Athena was livid and could only express that anger through her tears at the moment. She looked as though she wanted to blow something up.

“Are we sure he’s missing? Even when he’s easy to find, it can be difficult to find him,” Cullen walked over to her and took her hand.

“When he left this morning he said that he was going to talk to Leliana. He never went there.”

“And you have an idea as to where he is?”

“I do,” Athena’s violet eyes looked into her husband’s brown ones, searching.

“The tower,” Cullen said quietly, “You’re not climbing any more ladders.”

“I don’t want to, but Cole isn’t going to come out of hiding for a normal search party.”

Cullen sighed because he knew she was right, “Let’s go then.”

“Thank you,” Athena kissed him.

“Thank you for not trying to do this on your own,” Cullen said as they left their chambers. On their slow walk to the tower Athena used to frequent Cullen asked, “Were you able to get some rest?”

“I was. I slept most of the day except for when Ellendra came in,” Athena answered.

“Why was she there?” He wondered as he helped her up the stairs.

“To check on me, nothing more,” Athena reassured him.

“Who asked her to check on you?” Now Curly was confused as Duchess seemed uncomfortable, but not needing a healer when he left after breakfast.

“My guess is Varric.”

“He was that worried about you?” 

“After everyone left, I started feeling worse,” Athena sheepishly explained.

Cullen stopped her as they reached the top of the battlements. He wasn’t going to let her continue if she wasn’t feeling well, “You are feeling better now?”

Athena smiled, seeing the stern set to his jaw, “I am. What about you? How was your day?"

Cullen sighed in relief at her answer, as they started walking again, “It could have went better.”

“What happened?”

“There were some where they let their grief and anger get the best of them.” He didn’t want to go in to further detail, “Let’s find Cole.”

Athena needed to stop to catch her breath a short distance from the tower. While Curly waited he thought he should find out more about Cole’s disappearance, “How did you know that Cole was missing?”

“Leliana joined Mia and I for dinner. When I asked her about Cole, she said that she hadn’t seen him. He’s not one to lie,” Athena leaned against the wall.

“Would Rhys or Evangeline write to him as well?” Cullen wasn’t really expecting an answer.

“That’s what worries me. When we talked about his past, he didn’t want them found. He didn’t want to see or hear from them again,” Athena rubbed her belly as the baby had kicked her.

Cullen waited until she was ready and they set off again. Reaching the tower Cullen told Athena to wait where she was as he climbed the ladder to see if Cole was there. Cullen walked slowly up to him as he was never quite sure what to expect with Cole and said softly, “Cole, there are people looking for you.”

“I know. They’re easy to hide from,” Cole gazed out at the mountains.

“Athena is very worried about you,” Cullen told him.

“She told you to come here?”

“She’s on the lower level waiting for us,” Curly listened to Athena pace below him.

“She’s so caring and forgiving, why?” Cole finally looked at him.

“Because it’s who she is.”

“She doesn’t treat me any different even though I hurt her… I think,” Cole sounded confused, which was an infrequent thing these days.

“What do you mean you hurt her?” Cullen kept his voice level, even though he was feeling anything but.

“Cullen, Cole, get down here,” Athena shouted up, her patience completely gone. 

“We’ll come down when Cole answers me,” Curly called back.

“Then I’m coming up,” Athena returned as she picked up her skirt and stepped on the first rung of the ladder.

Cullen watched all of this and growled, “Let’s go down before she harms herself.”

They came down the ladder to meet Athena’s irritated gaze. Cullen wasn’t exactly happy either but he thought it prudent to take care of Cole before getting in to an argument with his wife, “I’m waiting.”

“When you were dying, I told her, she sent me away, but now acts as though it was nothing. With Rhys I can still feel that what I did haunts him. Why are they so different?” Cole answered, bewildered.

“Cole,” Athena took his hand so he would look at her, “I sent you away because I didn’t want you to see me cry. You didn’t hurt me or do anything wrong. All you did was repeat my nightmare back to me, and try to give me hope.”

“You were… Embarrassed? Varric always says that is how you get the Commander to blush so often,” Cole was uncertain, but he also enjoyed when Curly blushed.

“No, I wasn’t embarrassed... I was scared. I didn’t want to take that out on you, and that’s why I asked you to leave,” Athena explained.

“Thank you. Rhys wrote to me as well as Leliana. I think I should like to write him back,” Cole said with a hint of a smile.

“Have a good night, Cole,” Athena released his hand. Once Cole had disappeared from view, she held up her hand to stop her husband from speaking his mind, “Before you start in on me, I would like to go back to our quarters.”

Cullen’s glowering turned to an expression of concern as he uncrossed his arms, “Are you all right?”

Athena was gripping the ladder behind her, trying desperately to not give in to the pain, “My back feels as though someone is stepping on it repeatedly, and I know I’m going to need to use the garderobe soon.” 

Walking over to her, Cullen softly asked, “Would you like me to carry you?"

“Yes,” she softly moaned. Cullen picked Duchess up as gently as he could, wincing in sympathy to his wife’s hiss of pain. Athena wrapped her arm around Curly’s neck and buried her head in his shoulder to hide the tears that were falling from her eyes.

Everything in Cullen told him to rush to get Athena to where she needed to be, but he knew that if he ran, he would only hurt her more. His shoulder was already wet from his wife’s silent tears. So, Cullen moved slowly but efficiently, and walked the battlements through his old office and in to the atrium. It was the longer route but there were less stairs, which meant a less jarring ride for Athena.

In the atrium Athena tried to speak but her voice cracked with emotion and pain, so she whispered, “I need to use the garderobe.”

Cullen carried her until he was right outside the door of the garderobe and slowly lowered her feet to the ground. Poor Athena groaned in pain once her feet touched the stone floor. She released her husband to grip the doorway. She fought the urge to moan as each step brought a fresh wave of pain and inched her way in.

Cullen partially closed the door behind her so she could have some privacy. He resisted the urge to rush to the rescue every time he heard her whimper. After several minutes went by and Athena still hadn’t come out, he was starting to think that he should check on her. Curly heard Duchess gasp and pulled open the door. The sight that greeted him was Athena leaning against the wall with her hand pressing into her belly. The door had squeaked as Curly opened it and Athena looked over at him with her forehead resting on the cool wall and smiled wanly at him, “The baby decided to head but me again.”

Cullen filled the doorway and reached out a hand to her, “This room is too small for me to pick you up.”

“I know. I,” Athena sighed wearily, “just need another minute.”

Cullen waited patiently for her to move. When she did, he gently guided her out of the room and gathered her in his arms to continue the trek to their quarters. Because of the late hour there were only a couple people in the main hall. Our lovers quickly ascended to their quarters and Cullen gently laid his wife on the bed. Before Cullen could adjust the pillows around Athena, she sat up, “I’d rather not be stuck in this all night.”

Cullen helped her stand and Athena undressed, her clothing pooling around her feet. Athena sat down on the bed with every intention of laying down and then groaned as she struggled to stand. Cullen placed a supportive hand on her lower back as she gingerly stepped out of the pool of clothing and made her way to the garderobe.

Curly waited for Duchess close to the door in case she needed help. When she came out she was pressing her hand into her lower back. Cullen smiled sympathetically at her and they walked back to their bed. Helping his wife lay on her side, he laid behind her and rubbed her back, Athena moaned in relief. Cullen ordered softly, “If a search is needed while you’re still with child. You’re staying here.”

Athena sighed in light frustration, “You heard what Cole said. The others were easy for him to hide from.”

“Did you think I was going to harm him?” 

“No, I just didn’t feel like shouting my explanation. You weren’t here and Cole misunderstood. If I had known Cole thought he had hurt me, I would have explained myself long before now,” Athena shifted and rubbed her belly.

“You didn’t have to threaten to climb the ladder,” Cullen grumbled.

“Cullen, I was already starting to hurt. I know you didn’t have an easy day, and my patience isn’t what it used to be.”

“Why didn’t you say that you were hurting?” He asked, exasperated.

“Would you have let me stay and talk to Cole if I had?” Athena questioned as she rolled over to look at her husband. Cullen didn’t answer her and instead put his hands on her belly. Athena said softly, “I love you and I’m sorry that I am such a burden on you right now.”

“You are not a burden,” Cullen was emphatic staring directly in to his wife’s violet eyes.

“I didn’t have to carry you through most of Skyhold,” Athena gave in to the guilt she had been feeling lately.

“No, you just have to put up with my nightmares and heal me about once a week,” Cullen reminded her, as he moved one hand up from her belly to cup her cheek, “You are also carrying a child that I helped in creating. You have helped so many, you, above all, deserve to have that help returned.”

Athena shook her head at him with tears shining in her eyes. Cullen leaned down to kiss her and they made love. Afterwards Curly fell asleep, because Athena slept most of the day she wasn’t tired, but because she was pain free for the moment she was reluctant to leave. So she laid in her husband’s comforting embrace until she had to use the garderobe.

As the sun rose over the mountains Cullen’s nightmares began in full force. Athena came out of the garderobe and heard her husband calling out for help. Unbidden, tears came to her eyes as she lumbered over to him. She sat beside Cullen and placed his hand on her belly. Her tears fell, missing the ability to lay comfortably beside him and whisper in his ear to bring Cullen out of his dreams. When he woke he saw the tears and the deep circles under Athena’s eyes. Sitting up, Cullen asked, “Athena?”

“I’m too emotional for my own good,” Athena smiled at him and wiped away her tears.

“Did you get any sleep last night?”

Athena shook her head and the tears started again, “I was up to use the garderobe or because of the baby.”

Cullen sighed, “I wish you would wake me when you can’t sleep.”

“You get little enough sleep as it is, you don’t need me taking away more of it,” Athena arched her back. 

Cullen rubbed her back in an effort to release the tension she was feeling, “You haven’t been able to get any sleep during the night for a week now. I think it’s time we talk to Ellendra.”

“Ellendra and Morrigan have given me sleeping herbs, they don’t work for me. I only have a couple things to do this morning and then I’ll try to sleep.”

“I was thinking of talking to her to see if there was a way to bring on labor,” Cullen’s voice was soft, he knew the pregnancy was wearing on her.

Athena chuckled, “I know them all, and surprisingly, some that Morrigan hasn’t heard of.”

“Have you tried any?”

“You seem more excited to get this child out of me than I am,” Athena laughed, “Ellendra said to wait until the end of the week before trying to bring on labor.”

Cullen sighed again, “I wish there was something I could do to help you.”

“You’re doing it,” Athena smiled at him.

“Rubbing your back doesn’t seem to be much help when it only helps for a few minutes,” he groused.

“But it’s an extra few minutes where I’m not aching, and you’re not constantly questioning me on when I’m going to have the baby, or what I hope it will be, how big it will be…” Athena trailed off as her husband let out a low and menacing growl, “I see I’m not the only one getting asked.”

“I can’t walk through the main hall without getting incessantly questioned. The soldiers have bets going… It’s everywhere I go.”

“It sounds as though it’s a good thing the furtherest I venture is the main hall,” Athena responded as the baby kicked where Cullen’s hand was resting.

Breakfast was brought in as they finished talking. Cullen moved to sit beside his wife on the edge of the bed after the servants left, “What would you like to eat?”

“Nothing,” Athena made a face.

“Are you certain?” Cullen got up to fix a plate for himself after getting dressed.

“Yes. I’m not nauseous, but I have the feeling that if I ate right now, I would be spending the morning in the water closet instead of doing what I need to do.”

“What are you doing this morning?”

“Listening to complaints,” Athena sighed in aggravation, all she wanted to do was sleep.

“I can have Darius do the morning duties if you want me with you,” Curly took a bite of his food.

“I’ll be all right. It’s just that I can’t seem to get comfortable anywhere and even with the pillows, that chair is very uncomfortable.”

Cullen finished eating as his wife got up to pace. Athena’s pacing didn’t last long as she started to ache and sat down, rubbing her belly. He wondered, “Are you going to be able to be done by lunch time?”

“I certainly hope so.”

“Good,” Cullen kissed her, “Ready?”

“No, but I don’t have a choice,” Athena answered and they walked out of their quarters. On their way down they saw Darius waiting for Cullen in his office. Athena said to her husband, “You don’t have to walk me down.”

“I want to,” Cullen looked over at Darius who gave an approving nod.

Cullen saw Duchess to her throne and made eye contact with me that should Athena even twinge wrong I was to get him. I winked at him, getting his message loud and clear. Cullen bent down to kiss her and left. 

Sparkler was standing beside me, “I think we should have a game of Wicked Grace and have Athena and Cullen join.”

I chuckled, “You know, Sparkler, that’s not a bad idea. I’m sure Duchess would love the distraction of her husband losing. I’ll set it up.”

Dorian winked at me and went up to stand beside Athena in case she needed anything. Athena wasn’t pleased, “Dorian…”

“I am only here so you don’t have to shout across the hall if you need something.”

Athena sighed and motioned to Ruffles that she was ready to start. As the morning progressed Duchess looked more and more uncomfortable. I motioned to Sparkler that she needed a break. 

Athena stood, with her hand pressing into her back she made her way to the atrium without a word. I walked over to Ruffles and Sparkler, “How many more does she have to do?”

“Only one. It shouldn’t take long,” Josephine replied.

“What’s it about?” Dorian asked.

“Theft,” Ruffles answered. 

We waited patiently on Athena who was taking longer than usual to use the garderobe. I started to worry... Sparkler and I looked at each other, “She can yell at me later, but I’m going to go get Curly.” 

“I’m going to go check on her,” Dorian made his way to the atrium. I went through the door and up to Curly’s office, not seeing that Athena had come out as I left.

Sparkler walked over to her and saw that she was breathing heavily, “Running is an activity that isn’t best suited to you right now.”

“Ha ha,” Athena said without humor.

“Are you all right?” Dorian asked, worried for his cousin.

“I’m fine. I just needed some time.”

“Then why are you out of breath?”

“Because I get out of breath by just walking right now.” Athena looked warily at the throne, “Maker, I don’t want to sit on that chair.”

“Stand,” Sparkler suggested as they walked up to the dais.

“Standing is worse,” Athena tried very hard to not groan as she sat back down, placing her hand in front of her belly somehow let Ruffles know that Athena was ready to continue. What Duchess didn’t notice was Curly and I standing in front of the door to their quarters.

“How many more of these does she have to do?” Cullen questioned.

“This is the last one,” I answered, “Do you think Duchess would be interested in a game of Wicked Grace?”

“When you set it up, make sure it’s in our quarters?” Curly requested.

“I can do that. When do you want to have it?”

“How long does it take you to get everyone together?”

“A couple days at most. I should be able to get everyone together by week’s end.”

“Perfect,” Cullen watched Athena shift and slightly arch her back as she listened to the complainant continue on with a very descriptive explanation of what was stolen. The descriptions went on for over an hour.

Athena’s patience eroded away as her discomfort increased, “Is there someone you are accusing of the theft?”

The complainant looked to her with watery eyes and pointed at a young woman with blonde hair. Cullen growled low as the woman stepped up because he recognized her. The woman offered in her defense, “My entire family has been murdered. What’s a few trinkets?”

Cullen had started walking over to his wife as Athena held up her hand to stop the complainant from responding, “What do you mean by saying your entire family was murdered? Are you accusing the complainant of murdering your family?”

“No. I accuse you, Inquisitor,” the woman brandished a knife.

Cullen was in front of Athena in a flash with sword drawn. He menaced, “I’ve already explained to you that it was my order to go to Honnleath. Stand down or I will cut you down.”

The woman dropped her knife as the guards roughly grabbed her arms. She screamed, “Was it your order to go in to the Arbor Wilds? My father died there. What about Haven? My mother and brother died there.”

“Take her away,” Cullen ordered and then looked at Ruffles as he heard Athena gasp, “The Inquisitor is done for the day.”

Josephine nodded and motioned to the complainant still standing there, dumbfounded by what transpired. They left.

Cullen put away his sword and turned to face his wife. Athena had her eyes closed and was pressing her hand into her belly. Curly crouched down in front of her and waited patiently until she could open her eyes. When she did they were full of tears and pain. Cullen stood to whisper in her ear, “Can you walk?”

Athena nodded when Curly pulled back from her. Once Duchess was standing her husband wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close to him. They walked through the door to her quarters. Sparkler and I snuck in behind them. Once the door was closed, Cullen picked her up and carried her. 

Athena mildly protested, “I can walk.”

“I don’t want you to,” Cullen kissed her.

After the kiss ended she asked, “Who was she?”

“She lost her sister in Honnleath,” Cullen answered.

“What about her other claims?”

“The only time I’ve had to talk to her was after we received word on those we lost from Honnleath. Her sister was part of the Inquisition forces.” Cullen laid Athena in bed, “You need your rest.” Bending down to kiss her again he said, “I’ll be back for lunch.”

“Stay with me until I fall asleep?” Athena begged, taking hold of his hand. Cullen smiled and nodded. Sitting beside her he massaged her back. Sighing in relief Duchess closed her eyes and was asleep in a few minutes.

**

Sparkler and I waited for Curly in his office with Darius. Cullen asked upon seeing us, “Athena is asleep. Can you two watch over her without waking her?”

“We can manage that. She’s not going to be happy about having bodyguards though,” I answered.

“I’ll deal with her wrath later. I don’t think she saw the knife,” Cullen’s tone was thoughtful as he looked at Darius.

“Even if she did, she wouldn’t have been able to react fast enough,” Sparkler remarked.

“And that is why until she regains her speed, she will have someone watching over her,” Cullen assured all of us. Sparkler and I went up to watch over Duchess and Cullen started pacing.

“What’s going through your head, Commander?” Darius asked.

“That I want to keep my wife locked in our chambers until well after the baby is born.”

Darius chuckled, “I doubt the Inquisitor would like that.”

“Probably not, but it’s the safest option,” Cullen sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “She hasn’t been able to sleep during the night for a week now. She aches constantly and there’s little to nothing I can do to help her. When she was having contractions I at least knew the end was coming.”

“They stopped?”

“If she’s still having them she isn’t reacting to them anymore,” Cullen answered, “I had planned to take her out in to the garden this afternoon for lunch… I’m not sure that’s a wise idea anymore.”

“A change of scenery and watching the kids play will do you both some good,” Darius encouraged him.

“I shouldn’t be asking this of you again, but…” 

“You want me to take over command of the troops?” Darius guessed. Cullen nodded. “You know, most seconds normally do everything you do and report back to the Commander in an hour long meeting at the start and finish of the day….”

“What are you saying?” Cullen sounded hesitant.

“You don’t have to surrender command, just delegate more,” Darius advised.

“Our forces should see their Commander out there training with them and I cannot do that right now.”

“Our forces also know that the Commander is married to the Inquisitor who is due to give birth any day now. They understand, and they wouldn’t want it any other way,” Darius said softly.

Cullen sighed, “We’ll try it your way. If Athena doesn’t have the baby in the next week though…”

“We’ll talk about it then,” Darius smiled at his commander, “now, go back to your wife.”

“I wish I could. But I need to talk to Leliana about the prisoner,” Cullen said as they walked down the stairs.

“If she hadn’t pulled a knife on Athena, I’d tell you to delegate it to me… But I want the woman dead and the Inquisitor isn’t my wife,” Darius grumbled.

“If what she’s saying is true…”

“She shouldn’t have threatened the Inquisitor. More than that she shouldn’t have threatened a woman that is with child,” Darius gave voice to his opinion.

“I don’t disagree, but I also know that Athena would be incredibly upset if we wiped out a family because of a threat to her,” If the truth were to be told, Cullen wasn’t necessarily fond of the idea either.

“She’d say that she was threatened on a daily basis, this one shouldn’t be treated any differently,” Darius shook his head. “Dorian and I fight about that all the time. He shrugs insults and threats off like they’re nothing. I see that it bothers him, but he refuses to respond by saying that if he did react, they would just fear and hate him more.”

“He’s not wrong,” Cullen said softly.

Cullen and Darius parted ways after walking down the keep’s stairs. Our Commander headed to the dungeon. As he was going in, Nightingale came out, “She’s dead.”

“How?” He asked as they walked back to the keep.

“The guard said she snapped her neck with her chains,” Leliana answered, “I plan to go through her rooms. Would you care to join me?”

“No, I need to get back to Athena.”

“How is she? I’m sorry to say that my work has kept me from our daily meetings.”

“As well as can be expected I guess. She’s very uncomfortable right now…” Cullen paused as a thought had occurred to him to see if he could ease some of his wife’s discomfort, “Would it be possible to limit the judgements to once a day until after the baby is born?”

“I wouldn’t see why not. Will she be all right with that?” Leliana questioned.

“She isn’t sleeping at night and the throne is very uncomfortable for her right now.” Curly informed her Leliana nodded in understanding and they went their separate ways.

**

Want to place bets on how long Duchess will sleep?” I asked Sparkler as we watched Athena sleep.

“I don’t think we’ll have time,” Dorian answered as Duchess moaned in her sleep.

“Two to one odds that the woman that drew a knife on the Inquisitor doesn’t see the sunset,” I bet.

“You’re on. There’s no way my cousin would allow her husband to kill the last of a family,” Dorian accepted.

“I hate to tell you this, Sparkler, but your cousin is sleeping and Curly isn’t here.” 

“Do you really think the Commander wants to upset her? Especially now?” Dorian asked.

“What’s more important, her safety or upsetting her?” I asked in return.

“Her safety, but I doubt Athena will see it that way.” I couldn’t disagree with him.

Athena slept for about an hour. When she woke she went to the garderobe without noticing us. When she came out, she sighed in irritation upon seeing us, “Is my husband really that worried about me that I can’t call down the stairs if I need him?” 

“The Commander isn’t in his office,” Sparkler answered.

“Where is he?” Athena sounded worried.

“I imagine he’s interrogating the woman that pulled a knife on you,” I said.

“That would explain why Cullen jumped in front of me so fast,” Athena roamed around the room.

“You’re not upset?” I was shocked by her calm tone. I thought for sure that she would be at least a little upset.

“I could barely see straight because I was in so much pain. No, I’m not upset,” Athena rubbed the top of her belly.

“You only slept for an hour,” Sparkler reprimanded, “you should be getting more sleep.”

Athena walked over to him and placed his hand on her belly. He described the feel of it to me later as what he imagined feeling solid, rolling waves would be like. She told him, “Sleep is impossible right now.”

Sparkler took his hand back when she released it staring at Duchess’ belly as though his hand had passed through a rift, “How long does that go on?”

Athena sighed and rubbed the spot where the baby was moving, “Sometimes minutes, sometimes the better part of an hour. It all depends on what the baby feels like doing. This isn’t the worst of it.”

“Interested in a game of Wicked Grace until Curly gets back?” I hopefully asked.

“Varric, as much as I would love the distraction, I can’t,” Athena answered.

“We’ll go easy on you,” I winked at her.

“If I needed to lay down would you move the table and everything so I could keep playing?” 

“We could do something similar,” Sparkler said as he grabbed pillows off the bed and piled them on to the sofa. I moved the table over to in front of it and chairs for Dorian and I as he helped Duchess get as comfortable as she could.

By the time we were ready to play, Athena had tears in her eyes. I warned her, “You are not allowed to get emotional with the dwarf in the room. Save the tears for Curly.”

Athena chuckled, half sitting and half laying on the couch, “I make no promises.”

“At least she’s honest,” Sparkler quipped.

As expected, Athena couldn’t concentrate on the game, or sit, or lay still for it, so Dorian and I ended up trading stories and insults to amuse her. Curly walked in on her laughing so hard that she was crying, unfortunately her laughter was cut short by a gasp of pain, “Varric, you should not make me laugh that hard.”

“Duchess, you have heard me tell worse stories,” I teased.

“It- doesn’t matter,” She groaned as she fully sat up to make room for her husband (or so we thought,) who shook his head ruefully at her.

“You didn’t have to move,” Cullen chastised her.

Athena stood using the table for assistance, “Yes, I did.” And made her way to the garderobe.

“Thank you,” Cullen said quietly as Sparkler and I cleaned things up.

“It’s always a pleasure in getting her to laugh,” I remarked.

“We’ll do this again in a couple nights,” Sparkler reminded us.

“Be prepared to lose your clothes, Curly,” I teased.

“If it gets her to laugh and enjoy herself for a bit, my embarrassment’s worth it,” Cullen half smiled, and I detected a slight blush creeping into his cheeks.

I chuckled, “You’re a good man, Curly.”

“We’re still on for the family dinner tonight?” Dorian questioned.

“Dinner?” Cullen wondered why this was the first he was hearing of this.

“I see Athena forgot to tell you…” Sparkler actually blushed.

“So long as Athena is feeling up to it, I’m fine with it,” Cullen reassured him.

“Good!” Dorian said as we left. Leaving Curly alone to wait on his wife.

Cullen moved the pillows back from the couch to the bed and thought that there should be pillows in both places. So he went in to the linen closet to get the spare pillows and placed them on the couch. Not knowing what else to do he started to pace because he didn’t want to hover, but she was taking a very long time. After pacing for quite some time he knocked on the door and called out, “Athena?”

When he heard her groan he placed his hand on the door handle ready to open it, but she alleviated a little of his worry by saying, “I’ll be out in a minute.”

Curly waited impatiently for his wife to come out. When she did she smiled at him. Cullen couldn’t help but smile back, “Hi.”

“I didn’t mean to worry you,” Athena said by way of an apology.

“You were in there for a whie,” Cullen took hold of her hand.

Athena’s violet eyes grew wide, “I was? I must have dozed off.”

“I told Varric and Dorian to be quiet,” Cullen growled, perturbed at us.

“It wasn’t them. It was our child,” Athena said quietly.

“Oh… Did you get any sleep?” Cullen pulled his wife against him.

“About an hour.”

“How are you feeling?”

“Tired, achy… Nothing unusual… Why?” Athena watched her husband blush.

“If you’re feeling up to it… Would you like to have lunch in the garden?” Curly’s voice had a tinge of hesitation to it.

“I would love that,” Athena smiled at him, “though I’m quite curious as to why you’re blushing.”

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief, “With you not being able to get any rest… I wasn’t sure…”

Athena chuckled softly and kissed her husband, “Cullen, I love you.”

“I am acting rather foolish aren’t I?” He stopped her from nodding by kissing her, “I love you, too.”

Our lovers made their way down to the garden where a blanket had been spread out on the grass and pillows were on it for comfort along with a basket full of things Athena had been craving lately. She looked up at Curly, “This isn’t Josephine’s doing.”

“What gave that away?” Cullen smiled down at her.

“The blanket doesn’t have gold edges,” Duchess quipped.

“Mia helped,” Cullen chuckled softly as he helped his wife down on the blanket.

“You did this?” Athena struggled to situate herself.

“It was my idea…” Cullen trailed off as he sat down on the blanket and got food out of the basket.

Athena lasted all of five minutes before her back started begging for support. Near tears and with a catch to her voice she said, “I don’t think this is going to work.”

Cullen stopped eating to look at her and saw that she was arching her back. He smiled gently at Athena, “Lean against me.”

“Are you sure?” Athena was worried about hurting him.

Cullen stood and sat down behind Duchess. He pulled her against him, and tried to place pillows where he thought Athena might need them, “Yes, I’m sure.”

Athena sighed in almost comfort and they continued eating. When they were finished, Athena inquired, “What happened to the woman from this morning?”

“We’ll discuss it later, for now, just enjoy this,” Cullen softly ordered as he put their plates to the side and wrapped his arms around his wife, both of his hands coming to rest on her large belly. Athena placed her hand underneath one of his, which was rewarded by the baby with kicks, punches, and a head butt that left Athena gasping for air. 

Once she was able to breathe easier Cullen gently rubbed Duchess’ taut belly, causing her to moan in relief. Athena rested the back of her head against Cullen’s shoulder and closed her eyes. Cullen chuckled, “Enjoying yourself?”

“Immensely,” She purred. 

They sat that way for quite a while. Athena was leaning back on him quite heavily, so much so that Cullen thought that she had fallen asleep. He didn’t want to move for fear of waking her if she was.

Ana, Kieran, and the mabari came out to play, yelling and barking excitedly as they did so. Athena started awake and groaned, shifting to move her now sleeping feet from underneath her to in front of her. Once she was comfortable again Athena looked up at her husband, “Thank you.”

“For what?” Cullen gazed at his beautiful wife’s face.

“For getting me outside. Getting me to relax,” Athena kissed him, “for being you, my husband…” Athena slightly gasped as the baby kicked a sensitive spot, “and for our baby.”

“You’re welcome,” Cullen responded as Kieran and Ana came over.

“Can I…?” Ana started to ask. Athena smiled at her as she took Ana’s hand and placed it where the baby was kicking. Ana’s eyes got wide, “That is amazing!”

Athena chuckled, “Go play.”

Our lovers watched the children run and play. Ana would use her magic to find Kieran when they would play hide and seek. With the sun smiling down on the lush garden, Cullen and Athena laughed at the antics of the children and had a calm afternoon where they could forget about everything except each other, at least until Athena had to use the garderobe. She groaned because she didn’t want to move. Cullen questioned, “Athena?”

“I need to use the garderobe, but I don’t want to move,” she complained.

“We can come back,” Cullen offered. (It's like they lived there and could visit the garden daily, or something.)

“We have dinner plans tonight,” Athena said and then gasped, “I forgot to tell you!”

Cullen stood so he could help his wife up, “It’s all right, Dorian told me.”

Athena took hold of Curly’s hand and he pulled her up, reaching out to steady her as she wobbled. Once Duchess was steady on her feet, Cullen gathered the stuff they were using. Athena started to bend down to help. Cullen reprimanded, “Don’t you dare.”

“I am not that bad,” Athena quickly grabbed one of the pillows.

“Until the baby decides to kick you, or you lose your balance,” Cullen thought about taking the pillow from her, but ultimately decided against it. If Athena did fall, it would provide a little protection.

“I can carry one pillow,” Athena said softly as they made their way in to the keep. With Curly’s arms full, Athena had to open the doors, narrowly missing being run over twice. Ruffles saw them laden down with things and motioned to the servants to assist. Athena reluctantly gave up the pillow she was holding.

“You do realize we have more pillows than I’m willing to count in our quarters,” Cullen put his arm around her waist.

“But that one was outside with us,” Athena had tears filling her eyes.

Cullen shook his head at her realizing this was a pregnancy thing, “After our guests leave tonight we could put pillows out on the balcony.”

Athena’s eyes lit up, “You would do that for me?”

“Athena Rutherford, I would do anything for you,” Curly said softly (at least now she had a proper reason for having tears light those violet eyes of hers.)

Leliana was waiting for them in Curly’s office, and she was pacing. Athena looked worriedly at Nightingale; Cullen saw her expression and whispered that she could go upstairs. Athena left and Curly watched Leliana pace. Crossing his arms he announced his presence by saying Nightingale’s name.

“Where’s Athena? She needs to hear this too,” Leliana responded.

“If this has to do with the woman from earlier, I haven’t told Athena about what happened to her yet.”

“Then it’s best that she isn’t here,” Nightingale searched for a way to say what she was thinking. Her expression relaxed when she decided to be blunt, “The woman’s claims were true. Her brother was a red templar that attacked and killed her mother at Haven. The father never told her this as the brother was her twin. The father became one of my scouts… Whom we lost in the Arbor Wilds. However there seems to be another member of the family given to the circle at a very young age. It is possible that the woman never knew this person existed.”

Cullen had closed his eyes during Nightingale’s description, “Let’s find out more about this mage before we contact them.”

“Understood,” Leliana said, “I spoke with Josephine and she said doing one judgement a day was fine. In fact, I think she was relieved, she could not figure out a way to make the throne more comfortable for Athena.”

Cullen nodded in understanding and heard the door open to their chambers. Athena called out, “Cullen?”

“Yes, love?” He walked over to the bottom of the stairs to see Duchess gripping the door way so she wouldn’t fall. He raced up to her and gently released her grip to have her sit on the stairs. Cullen sat beside her and rubbed her back until the contraction passed.

“Should I get Ellendra?” Leliana offered.

“No, one contraction isn’t worth panicking everyone,” Athena sighed with a hint of frustration.

“Are you sure?” Cullen asked.

“Yes, I’m sure,” Athena replied, “this is nothing new and everyone is waiting for us anyway.”

“Nothing new? I thought you weren’t having contractions anymore,” Curly raised an eyebrow at her.

“I’ve been having at least one daily…” Athena trailed off, “nightly for the past couple days.”

“And you didn’t wake me because….?” Cullen was doing his best to not show his irritation.

“So at least one of us could get some sleep?” Athena used her husband’s shoulder to stand. Cullen didn’t move a muscle until he felt his wife’s hand leave his shoulder.

When he stood he blocked her from going anywhere by taking hold of Duchess’ shoulders, “When you have contractions you need to wake me.”

Athena looked away from him to see what Leliana thought, shaking her head, Nightingale said, “I agree with Cullen on this one. There is absolutely no reason for you to go through that alone. I must be off. Enjoy your dinner.” 

Cullen didn’t let go of Athena after Leliana left. He wanted to get his point across without upsetting his wife, “If I have to force myself to stay awake until the baby is born, I will do so. You need your rest too. I may not be able to help much, but allow me to at least try.” 

Athena nodded that she would with tears in her eyes. Cullen pulled her in for a tight hug and whispered hoarsely, “Thank you.”

Athena moaned softly as the baby pressed down on her to get away from being pressed on. Cullen released her and she immediately started to sag holding the underside of her large belly. Duchess whispered that she needed to use the water closet as Cullen kept her from falling.

“Do you want me to carry you?” He offered. 

Athena shook her head as they slowly made it up the stairs, “I think Ellendra may have been right about more than one baby.”

“Why do you think that?” When they stopped outside the garderobe door Athena answered him by placing one of her husband’s hands underneath her large belly and the other a little ways above it where two objects that were larger than an elbow or foot were pressing against her. Then one of them pulled back and slammed down causing Athena to gasp. 

Cullen swore softly, “Maker’s breath, no wonder you can’t sleep.”

Athena closed the door to the garderobe as Cullen realized that there was no one waiting for them, “Athena, where is everyone?”

“There’s a note on my desk,” came her muffled response.

Curly picked up the note and read it: The plans have changed, we are now meeting in the formal hall. I’m sorry Athena. Love, Mia

Cullen’s fist closed on the note, crumpling it, and he growled. Taken to pacing while he waited on his wife, he steamed, thinking: if it were some noble fop doing this I would almost understand, but they see how much she’s been struggling. This is ridiculous, asking a woman that’s mere days away from giving birth to walk down several flights of stairs. 

He was also quite irritated because he had been looking forward to shooing the family away early so he and Duchess could get to what they talked about when they came in from the garden. And then he heard a soft chuckle... Glancing in the direction of the garderobe he saw his wife covering her mouth with her hand to hide her laughter. “Wife,” he grumbled as he walked over to Athena, “Do I want to know how long you were standing there?”

Athena outright laughed, “No.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay here? I can have everyone come up here. Or we could plan it for another night.” Cullen was very serious.

“Cullen, I’ll be fine. Going down the stairs usually isn’t an issue... And I’ve had more sleep today than I’ve had in a week.” Athena smiled seductively at him, “The faster we get this dinner over with, the faster we can come back here. I apparently have a thing for Commanders that grumble and pace.”

“I was not grumbling!” Cullen blushed, as they descended to the door.

“Yes, you were,” Athena teased, “and I found it adorable.”

“Maker’s breath, woman!” Curly kissed her to hide his deepening blush.

They made their way down to the main hall where Athena needed to sit for a few minutes and they noticed that no one was there. Athena asked, “Cullen, what’s going on?”

“Your guess is as good as mine, love,” he answered holding her hand, “ready?”

Athena nodded and gingerly stood so they could continue walking through the keep. When they came in to the formal hall we all yelled, “Surprise!” Athena jumped and Cullen put steadying arms around her.

Our lovers looked around the room and saw that it was decorated with baby items, presents, and there was a lot of food. Thankfully, half of Skyhold was also there. Athena leaned back to look at her husband, “Did you do this?”

“No, I had no idea anything was going on until Dorian informed me of a family dinner,” Curly was awed by everything. 

Josephine motioned that they should sit at the table nearest them so everyone could eat. Mia and Dorian sat with our lovers and a light banter was kept up through the meal. By the end of the meal Athena’s back was aching. She groaned softly as she arched it; Cullen, ever watchful of his wife, rubbed her back. Athena sighed in relief and pressed her back into his hand in an effort to get Curly to rub harder, which he did. 

When Athena left to use the garderobe, Cullen asked no one in particular, “Who do I get to blame for ruining the plans I had for after dinner?”

“That would be me, dear brother. Rosalie begged me for a gathering when she was with child. And I had assumed it wouldn’t occur to either one of you. How does this ruin your plans?” Mia was curious to know what her brother was up to.

“There’s at least five sets of stairs between here and our quarters and Athena’s back has already started to bother her,” Curly answered his sister.

“Carry her up the stairs,” Sparkler suggested.

“It doesn’t help her back any, Dorian,” Cullen took a large drink from his mug after he spoke.

“You’re late,” Dorian chastised as he saw Darius coming down the stairs. 

“In a minute, love. Commander, may I have a word?” Darius stood in front of the table.

“Of course,” Cullen stood and walked up the stairs with Darius.

Darius informed him that there had been a fight between some of the new recruits and how training went. The meeting took well over an hour and Curly said he would talk to the recruits in the morning. 

When they came back down the stairs they saw Athena standing with her back to the pillar closest to the table they were sitting at, surrounded by noble well-wishers. Cullen also saw the pain she was in etched on her face (it was the only thing visible with the crowd around her.) He growled low and menacing, stalking over to the crowd and shouldered his way to his wife, “If you have absolute need of speaking to the Inquisitor you can do it while she is seated.”

The crowd quickly dispersed, and they put an arm around each other as they walked back to their now empty table. Cullen asked, “Where did everyone go?”

“When I came out of the garderobe the only one I knew was Varric, and he looked utterly miserable so I told him to go to the tavern. Which took a lot of convincing, threatening, and promising that all I would do is sit,” Athena chuckled.

“I’m surprised he still left,” Cullen murmured.

“Bianca was waiting for him.” Athena groaned, “This chair is killing me.”

“I will quite happily dismiss everyone,” Cullen was about to stand, eager to leave.

“At least wait until Josie or Mia get back,” Athena quietly requested.

“That could take all night,” Cullen grumbled softly, wishing there was more he could do for his wife as he fully returned to sitting.

“Maker willing, it won’t.”

“So you were standing because you didn’t want to sit down?” Cullen massaged Duchess’ lower back.

“Initially, and then a crowd gathered and kept me there longer than my back enjoyed,” Athena gasped softly as Curly hit a sore spot.

Morrigan walked in from the kitchen, pleased to see Athena, “There you are!”

“I was missing?” Athena asked, dumbfounded.

“The Ambassador had an emergency meeting and then we couldn’t find you…”

“Morrigan, you’ve been through this before,” Athena chuckled.

“We checked the garderobes down here, there was no answer,” Morrigan argued with indignation.

“Did you fall asleep again?” Cullen questioned his wife.

“No!” She exclaimed, “There’s a small one right off of the library down here.”

“Where is this library you speak of?” Morrigan inquired.

Athena pointed behind her and to the left. Cullen shook his head and chuckled, “With as little time as you spent here during the war, how is it possible that you know this place top to bottom?”

“There were times that I had nothing to do, so I would explore. I’d get lost in a book, until I heard people calling for me. It sounds as though I’m not the only one that frequents the library down here…” Athena raised an eyebrow at her husband.

Cullen shrugged, “I found it in my days where Leliana would accuse me of worrying needlessly over you. It has some fascinating books.”

“I will be seeing this library on the morrow. Would you like to join me?” Morrigan asked Athena.

“I don’t know, Morrigan,” Athena seemed uneasy, “it depends on if I can get any sleep tonight and what Ellendra says in the morning.”

“Understood,” Morrigan nodded as family and friends started coming back in. Morrigan caught them before they could say anything to Duchess and explained to them what happened. Which was a blessing for Athena as a contraction hit and she groaned softly, rubbing her belly in an effort to make the tension go away.

Cullen noticed and pulled his chair closer to hers. He whispered to her about the stars they were going to relax under tonight. He gently reminded her to breathe and never stopped rubbing her back. With his other hand he gently cupped Athena’s cheek and whispered as he put his forehead against hers, “You’re still the most beautiful woman in all of Thedas. I love you.”

Athena’s voice cracked with emotion and ebbing pain, “I love you, too. I can’t wait to get out of here.”

Cullen stood and walked over to Mia, “Athena’s done, she’s in too much pain to stay here any longer.” 

“I’ll make her excuses,” Mia smiled reassuringly at her brother.

Cullen walked over to his wife and held out a hand for her, “Let’s go.”

The music started playing and Athena asked, "One dance, please?”

“Are you certain?”

“No, but I want to try anyway,” Athena took her husband’s proffered hand to stand and they moved to the center of the room.   
They slowly twirled around the room once, twice, thrice and then Athena gasped as the baby punched her so hard that Cullen felt it and he was only slightly pressing their bellies together, not wanting to add to Duchess’ discomfort. They stopped dancing and Athena sighed as she felt the tension in her back increase, “I need to lay down.”

“Then we’ll go,” Cullen put an arm around his wife’s waist and pulled her close to him as they walked to and up the stairs. Once through the empty hall Cullen carried Athena the rest of the way. When they reached their quarters Athena had to once again use the garderobe. Curly filled the east balcony with pillows and blankets and took off his armor while he waited for his wife.

Athena came out and gasped at the sight of the pillow and blanket laden balcony. She walked over to her husband, who was standing at the doorway to the balcony with his arms crossed. Athena asked, “You have more planned than just looking up at the stars, don’t you?”

“I do,” Cullen smiled seductively at her and drew her on to the balcony.

“Cullen, I…” Athena trailed off, worried that she might have to refuse him.

“Shh, we won’t do anything you’re uncomfortable doing,” Cullen held her hand while she sat down.

“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” Athena replied as her husband sat down behind her.

“Nearly sacrifice yourself at Haven, save the world, stop a war, among other things,” Cullen reminded her as he wrapped his arms around her, splaying his hands over her large belly.

Athena leaned back against her husband, using his shoulder as a pillow, and looked up at the stars, “I never would have thought to do this.”

“You would have eventually,” Cullen caressed her belly.

Athena grabbed a pillow off to her side and put it behind her back, and let herself enjoy being held by her husband. Until he started kissing her neck and she enjoyed the attention that much more. Cullen pulled Duchess’ dress off of her shoulder and continued kissing there… At least until his wife gasped. Athena moved his hand that was still on her belly to the reason she gasped. Cullen smiled against her shoulder feeling a strong wave of movement beneath his hand. Once the movement stopped Curly started to knead his wife’s taut belly. Athena groaned in relief and leaned back against her husband more.

Cullen gently massaged Duchess’ entire belly and then untied her dress and pulled it down, baring everything to her waist. Athena shivered with the sudden draft along with Cullen’s dancing fingers along her spine. He shifted so his wife could lay on her side and continued to undress her. Kissing her everywhere along the way. 

Athena groaned with desire and when her husband was within her reach again, she tugged his shirt out of his pants. Cullen assisted with getting it off. Athena lightly scraped her fingernails along her husband’s now bare chest, shoulder, and arm. She then pulled at his belt and undid his pants.

Cullen growled in response and ripped his pants off. Love and desire coursed through both of them now. Curly arranged the pillows so Athena wouldn’t fully be on her back when he straddled her. Athena trailed her hand down, caressing him and caused Cullen to groan out her name.

Athena smirked at him… At least until he did the same to her.

When they finished making love they wrapped themselves in blankets. Athena groaned as a contraction came upon her. Cullen sat up from laying behind her, worried, “Athena?”

“Contraction,” she whispered when the tightness passed, “making love can bring on labor.”

“Is that so?” Curly had a very smug smile. 

Athena teared up and glanced away from her husband. Cullen wouldn’t let her hide and gently moved her gaze to meet his, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m terrified. I don’t know how to be a mother. What happens if I’m called away? I can’t take a baby along with me to fight or Maker knows what else. Who’s going to feed it when I’m not here? What if I don’t come back for months on end? Cullen, I don’t want to be Inquisitor anymore,” Athena broke down, sobbing.

Cullen held her as she cried. When the sobbing quieted, he assured her, “You will be a fantastic mother. I have yet to meet a child that isn’t in love with you...”

“I can’t play with them,” Duchess interrupted.

“Not right now, no, but you always did before. All of the other stuff we will worry about if and when we come to it.” Cullen kissed her, “You didn’t allow me to give up when I was dying or fighting lyrium withdrawal. Do you really think I’m going to allow you to give up because we’ll have a child… Or children? I want you to relax and enjoy the night.”

“Are we sleeping out here?”

“Would you like to?” 

“I’ll have to wake you so I can use the garderobe during the night,” Athena worried (hey, Duchess, that’s Curly’s job).

“Good. That didn’t answer my question. Do you want to sleep out here tonight?” Cullen asked again.

“Andraste preserve me, I do,” Athena’s sigh shuddered through her body. 

“Then that is what we will do,” Cullen kissed her. As he was kissing her he felt her stiffen, when they stopped Athena moaned, struggling to get up. Cullen stood to help her up and Athena ran to the garderobe. Cullen waited for his wife by the water closet door in case she needed help.

When Athena came out she was still trying to catch her breath. Holding the underside of her belly she panted, “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Feeling better?” Cullen asked hopefully as they walked back to the balcony.

“No,” Athena groaned as she sat down, “one is pressing on my bladder and it feels as though another wants to come through my back.”

“Lay down, love,” Cullen sat beside her to assist her in getting to a comfortable, warm, and supine position. He joined her, massaging her back until she sighed and then massaged her belly to release tension and perhaps get the babe to shift; Athena sighed in relief once it did. Cullen wrapped his arms around her and their unborn babe, and waited for his wife to drift off to sleep before he closed his eyes.

Athena was up every couple hours and Curly was up with her. As the first rays of the sun broke over the mountain Cullen’s dreams started anew. Athena had been sleeping with her back to her husband and rolled over to face him. The dream was an intense one causing Cullen to thrash about in his sleep and he unknowingly backhanded Athena’s belly. She gasped, but still had the presence of mind to reach for his hand. Ignoring her own pain, “Cullen, it’s just a dream.”

As always, her voice was a balm on his raw dreams and he stilled. Athena whimpered as the contraction was stronger than any she’d felt previously. Cullen opened his brown eyes to tears shining in his wife’s violet eyes, “Athena?” 

Not trusting her voice she put the hand she was holding on her belly. It was very tense. Cullen half sat up and whispered that she needed to breathe. Once the contraction passed and Duchess was breathing normally again she asked for her husband’s help in getting to the garderobe. She tried to hide the pain she was in but wasn’t very successful, her husband was very worried for her by the time Ellendra came to check on the Athena.

“Good morning, Commander. The Inquisitor is in the garderobe?” Ellendra noted the disheveled balcony that Curly was trying to clean up.

“She is. Athena had a powerful contraction when I woke and I think she’s still feeling the effects of it,” Cullen explained.

“I’ll make sure to ask her about it,” Ellendra smiled at him, “Knight-Captain Darius was waiting for you in your office.”

Cullen closed his eyes and swore, “The new recruit fight.” Opening them he looked at Ellendra, “You’ll stay with her until my sister comes? She’s to meet us for breakfast.”

Ellendra nodded. Cullen looked hesitantly at the garderobe door, sighed, and left. A couple minutes later Athena came out almost doubled over. Ellendra came to assist her to the bed, “The Commander wasn’t overstating that you were in a great deal of pain.”

“It’s nothing. We shouldn’t have slept on the balcony,” Athena laid on the bed.

“Anything I should know about?” Ellendra asked as Athena made herself ready for the exam.

“Where’s Cullen?” Athena looked about the room and saw that the balcony was still in disarray.

“He had a meeting that sounded as though it couldn’t wait,” Ellendra pressed on Athena’s belly to see where the babe was. 

Athena hissed in pain when she reached the spot where Cullen had hit her, “What happened there?”

“Cullen was having a nightmare and swung out…” Athena trailed off.

“And he caught you there?” Ellendra gently continued to examine Duchess. Athena nodded in answer. “Does anything else hurt?”

“From that? No.”

“Then why were you so hunched over coming out of the garderobe?”

“My back is aching more than usual today,” Athena responded.

Ellendra finished her examination of Athena, “You don’t have much longer to go. I would be very surprised if you do not give birth within the next week. Interested in finding out how many you’re having?”

“Are you still thinking that I’m having twins?”

“I am indeed,” Ellendra smiled at her.

Athena sat up and closed her robe, “I am, but that’s something Cullen should be here for.”

“I can come back later,” Ellendra offered.

“That would be fantastic,” Athena pressed the heel of her palm in to her lower back which didn’t go unnoticed by Ellendra. And then someone burst in to the room calling for Ellendra. She looked at Athena who nodded her head and said, “Go.”

“No work today… Or for the next few weeks,” Ellendra admonished on her way out.

Athena sighed as she looked at the balcony and smiled because it was a perfect evening spent with her husband. The baby kicked her, breaking her out of her reverie, and she slowly walked over to the closet. She chose a purple dress with sky blue lace covering it. After she took off her robe, she placed her hand where Cullen had caught her, wondering what he had been dreaming about. 

Once dressed she went out to the balcony and using the railing she started gathering pillows and blankets, because of her extended belly, and the ever present ache in her back, she only took one of each at a time.

By the fifth trip Athena was out of breath but continued the slow process. By the tenth trip, Athena was sweating and gasping for air and that was how Mia and Morrigan found her. Mia was the first to chastise, “Athena Rutherford! What do you think you’re doing?!”

Athena wiped the sweat off of her forehead with her forearm and panted out, “Trying to clean the mess we made.”

“We will handle the clean up. You either sit or lay down,” Mia ordered her sister in law.

Morrigan helped Athena to repose on the bed. Sitting she did well with, but because there were blankets piled up on the other half of the bed, she couldn’t slide fully on to the bed like she usually did, taking several tries to get her feet up. Once her feet were on the bed a contraction made its presence known and Athena tried to focus on her breathing but the contraction became so intense that she bit her lip to keep from crying out.

Morrigan was sitting beside her and noticed how incredibly still her friend went. Seeing the blood on Athena’s lip Morrigan cocked an eyebrow, “We all know that you are near your time. There is no reason to harm yourself to hide the pain.”

Athena got up as breakfast had been delivered during her contraction, “The servants do not need to hear me cry out in pain.”

“Does it matter?” Mia thought Duchess’ reasoning was silly.

“You want the servants running and telling everyone that I’m giving birth when I’m not?” Athena sat down at the table to eat.

“Would they really do that?” Mia inquired.

“They would. Have you any interest in joining me in the old library, Athena?” Morrigan sat down beside Duchess at the table to eat breakfast.

“Interest? Yes,” Athena hesitated, “But I do not know how long I will last.”

“The walk will be good for you, my dear. If you would like, I could come along. I wouldn’t mind seeing this library,” Mia offered.

“’Tis settled, after breakfast we will unravel the mysteries of the library,” Morrigan intoned which had the other two laughing.

The ladies finished eating and traveled at a slow pace for Duchess, talking of the weather, children, and Cullen’s dog (it never left his side unless Athena was in the room, then the mabari would stick to her like a dwarven ale sticks to a belly.) As they passed Curly’s office, they saw that he wasn’t there so Athena left a quick note so he wouldn’t worry.

Morrigan wondered where he was. Athena explained what Ellendra had told her. Mia also found it odd, “He still should have told someone where he went. What if you were to go in to labor and we couldn’t find him?”

Athena chuckled softly, imagining the panic that scenario would set off, “The baby won’t come that fast. And I have no doubt that Leliana knows where Cullen is.”

“You find your husband missing funny?” Mia was incredulous.

Athena out right laughed, remembering the first time Cullen had ‘disappeared’ on her, “It’s not the first time and he always turns up eventually.” She let the other ladies go ahead of her and murmured under her breath, “I just hope he isn’t sleeping in a tub somewhere.”


	53. Chapter 53

The library looked as though it hadn’t been dusted in at least two ages. Weary from the walk, Athena moved several books that were thickly coated with dust off of a cobwebbed and ornate chair. Sitting, she sighed in relief, watching Morrigan and Mia move about the small library. As the ladies took in the different books, Duchess rested her head back on the chair and closed her eyes, within minutes she was asleep.

Our trio of ladies spent a few hours in the abandoned library. When Mia and Morrigan were ready to leave they had to wake a still sleeping Athena. She stretched awake, “How long was I asleep?”

“A few hours. Was there something you wanted to look for?” Mia smiled at her sister in law.

“No, before we leave I do need to use the garderobe,” Athena stood and made her way to the Small garerobe while Morrigan and Mia gathered their books. When Athena was finished they made the slow walk back to Duchess’ and Curly’s quarters. Cullen met them there.

“Enjoy the library?” He smiled at his wife.

“Ask Mia and Morrigan. I slept through it,” Duchess walked over to him.

“It was amazing. There are books there that look as though they haven’t been touched in an age or more.” Mia smiled conspiratorially at Morrigan, “I doubt you want to hear about what we found.”

“Aye, I doubt they do. I do believe we should take our leave,” Morrigan returned Mia’s smile.

When they left Cullen gently pulled his wife in to his arms. They stood like that until Athena started shifting from one foot to the other. Cullen released her, “Why don’t you sit or lay down?”

“I sat all morning, if I lay down, I’ll fall asleep. When I stand in one place too long, everything starts to ache...” Athena answered him as he caressed her belly, seemingly distracted. She saw the deep furrow to his brow and wondered what he was thinking, “Cullen?”

Pushing his dark thoughts away and without a word, Cullen swiftly picked his wife up and strode to the bed. Placing Athena on it, he quickly stripped out of his armor and then undressed her. When Cullen mounted her he noticed a mark on her belly which had tinged her skin blue and purple. Circling it with his finger he asked, “Athena, what’s this?”

Athena sighed, with her trip to the library and her nap, she had completely forgotten about Cullen’s nightmare, “It’s nothing.”

Cullen placed his hand over the bruise, causing his wife to wince slightly, “The fact that it hurts you tells me that it is not nothing.”

“Cullen, you know that right now just about everything aches on me,” Athena arched her back as it was bothering her more with the extra weight pressing down on it, “Can we discuss it after we make love?”

He looked at Athena for a while, weighing if he should press the matter further or continue with his original plan. Duchess was getting more uncomfortable by the minute, and was quickly losing the desire to make love. Curly finally nodded his head and proceeded to gently make love to her. Once he was certain that Athena was as comfortable as she could get he demanded, “Tell me what happened.”

“The only way I’ll tell you is if you promise that you won’t blame them,” Athena ordered as she sat up.

“Athena,” Cullen warned, itching to hurt whomever harmed his wife.

“Promise me,” Athena had steel in her voice, and chastised herself, why didn’t she ask Ellendra to heal her?

“I promise,” Cullen grumbled.

Athena sighed, already regretting the decision to tell Cullen what happened. She took hold of her husband’s hand, “You were dreaming and thrashing about-”

“Maker’s breath! I caught you?” Athena slowly and almost imperceptibly nodded. Cullen closed his eyes, when he opened them they were filled with guilt and pain, “Are you all right? Is the baby? Why didn’t you tell me when you woke me?”

“The baby and I are fine. I didn’t want to worry you or have you blame yourself.”

“I am so sorry,” Cullen rasped out pulling Athena close to him and kissed the top of her head so she wouldn’t see his tears.  
Athena pulled away from her husband a little because he felt incredibly tense to her, “Cullen, do not make me regret telling you.”

Cullen sighed. He knew she was right, but he couldn’t shake the guilt he was feeling. So he decided that he was going to stay awake until the babe was born… (no, that’s not a disaster waiting to happen.) He half heartedly smiled at her, “I’ll do my best. What would you like to do?”

“What meeting did you have this morning? I also want to know what happened to the woman yesterday.”

“She died before anyone could talk to her. From what Leliana reported, she is not the last of her family. There may be a mage sibling that she didn’t know of,” Cullen responded to her last request, unwilling to talk about the new recruit fight.

“Were her other claims true?” Athena placed her hand behind her on the bed to stretch out her aching back.

“I’m not going to say anything further about this until you lay down,” Cullen was ready to catch her if she collapsed. Athena sighed in frustration and did as he commanded. 

Curly started to massage her back, “They were… In a way,” he paused because his wife gasped in pain. Once he was certain Athena was fine he continued, “Her brother was part of the red templars and he killed their mother at Haven. Her father was one of Leliana’s agents and was lost in the Arbor Wilds, and you know about her sister.”

Athena closed her violet eyes against the tears that threatened, wondering if the cost of the war would ever truly end. Her eyes were still haunted when she opened them, but she also noticed that Cullen didn’t talk of the meeting he had this morning. Thinking that he hadn’t heard her, Duchess asked about it again.

Cullen sighed, knowing that he couldn’t avoid talking about it now, “Darius informed me last night that there had been a fight among some of the new recruits and we went to talk to them about it.”

“What were they fighting about?” 

“It was a misunderstanding that was fueled by short tempers,” Cullen somewhat explained.

“You could say that you don’t want to talk about it,” Athena quipped. She knew Curly well enough to know when he didn’t want to talk.

“Good. Right now I want to think of nothing except you,” he bent down for a long kiss which was interrupted by a knock on the door. Cullen growled and went to answer it.

As Ellendra came up the stairs, she asked, “Shall we find out how many you’re having?”

Athena looked at Cullen, he smiled at his lovely wife and nodded. Ellendra used magic to see inside Duchess’ womb, “Two perfectly healthy babies. If you haven’t already started, you can do whatever you feel is safe to bring on full labor.” 

Ellendra left our lovers staring in to each others eyes. Curly smirked, “How often would you like to make love?”

“As often as our children will allow it,” Athena pulled her husband down on top of her and kissed him.

**

Over the next several days Athena’s temper grew shorter, just like the amount of time in between contractions. The babies were just as active in trying to find their way out. Sleep was almost nonexistent for her unless it was in the afternoon… apparently that was when the twins decided to sleep. She also knew that Cullen was blaming himself for hitting her while he was dreaming.   
On the day of the Wicked Grace game Morrigan and Mia joined our lovers for breakfast. And they came in to a battle with Cullen saying, “Athena, you need to eat.”

“I’m not hungry!” Athena stood with her back to the bookshelves, using them for support.

“You haven’t had anything to eat since lunch yesterday,” Cullen paced, exasperated and on an even shorter fuse than Duchess because he wasn’t sleeping either (Athena was only a little to blame for that.)

“What don’t you understand about not being hungry?!” Athena was close to yelling.

“You’re also not sleeping!”

“I’m not the only one!” Duchess shot back.

“I’m trying to take care of you!” Cullen marched over to her.

“And how are you supposed to do that when you force yourself to stay awake?” Athena accused.

“Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean you have to be,” Cullen groused.

“I don’t get a choice! I have two little ones inside me that think night time is play time!” Athena yelled and then said brokenly with tears in her eyes, “I never should have told you.”

Cullen stopped and started several times. He then stalked off and as he passed Morrigan he curtly said, “You can deal with her.”

Athena waited until she heard the door slam shut to let it be known that she was having a contraction. Loudly groaning, she stumbled to her desk in the hopes of continuing to stand. Morrigan walked over to her panting friend and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and whispered, “Breathe.”

Athena did as she was told and as the contraction released its hold, her breathing normalized. The ladies walked over to the table and sat; Athena was immediately uncomfortable, unable to find relief she stood and paced. 

Mia watched her sister in law pace and was quite worried, “Do you want to tell us what that was about?”

“Because of Cullen’s dreams he isn’t sleeping. I can see that he’s in pain, but every time I ask, he says that he’s fine,” Athena paced on to the balcony.

“You both have limited amounts of patience right now, which is understandable. Yes, Cullen should be trying to sleep. But please know that he sees the woman he loves and would do anything for in a great deal of discomfort and there is absolutely nothing he can do about it.” Mia defended her brother.

“He thinks he caused it,” Athena stared, unseeing at the mountains, still lost in the heated argument with Cullen.

Morrigan joined them on the balcony and softly chuckled, “He did.”

Athena gave a shaky sigh, “Not the babies…”

“Athena, what happened?” Mia was the voice of authority.

“He had a nightmare. Cullen was thrashing about, and he caught me,” Athena gripped the railing as all the energy from the argument drained out of her at once and she was left feeling incredibly weak.

Mia put an arm around her and they walked back in so Athena could at least sit down. Duchess groaned as she sat in the nearest chair, her back reminding her that she was asking it to carry too much weight to be doing much of anything really. Closing her eyes, she slouched in the chair and rested her hand on top of her belly. Mia touched her shoulder, “Go to bed.”

Athena sighed wearily, but stood anyway. Barely able to keep her eyes open she wobbled to bed, touching things to steady her along the way and collapsed on the bed. She arranged the pillows for the most comfort, and closed her eyes. 

Cullen was at the sparring ring to work off his anger, frustration, and guilt against anyone that would come against him. After each bout he had to shake his head to clear the fog of exhaustion and the pain of lyrium withdrawal. That is where Darius found him.

As Darius readied to spar with his Commander, he stated, “Your wife needs you.”

“My wife is understandably very irritated with me right now,” Cullen said softly to not aggravate his already aching head. “This is for her.”

Darius and Cullen locked up and Darius noted how weak Cullen was as he pushed Curly back with little effort. As they locked up again Darius said, “You should be resting as well.”

“Athena needs her rest more than I do. Morrigan and Mia can get her there,” Cullen pushed his second in command back, but there was no strength behind the move.

“Cullen, Athena’s been exhausted for weeks. We all see it, but there is nothing she can do about it right now. You can do something about your exhaustion.” They locked up again but Cullen faltered and went down on one knee. Darius shook his head at the younger man, “You’re in no condition to spar and you know it.”

When Darius helped him up, Cullen replied softly, “I’m in no condition to go back to my wife either.”

“She’s the only one that can improve your condition,” Darius responded as they walked in to the main hall. 

Cullen nodded in assent as they parted ways. He winced as nodding brought on a fresh wave of pain. He slowly climbed the stairs as each step sent another wave of agony through him. Curly passed through his office, stumbling and slammed against the wall of the stairwell as the memories of the torture he suffered washed over him in a flood. Groaning and barely able to see he climbed the next to last set of stairs and through the door to the chambers he shared with his wife. Cullen heard Athena moan, bringing him forcefully back to the present and he cursed himself for a fool. 

Cullen stumbled to the bed, unable to keep his eyes open as any light that touched them sent daggers stabbing in to his head. Once the bed was found he reached out to make sure Athena was upon it, which she was. Cullen laid down beside her and the self flagellation continued as he whispered brokenly, “I am so sorry.”

Because of a contraction Athena had curled herself in to as much of a fetal position as her extended belly would allow. She fought against the urge to hiss in pain as her husband laid down beside her. When he reached out to start massaging her back she jerked away from his touch as her back was even worse than her belly. Alarmed, Cullen whispered, “Athena?”

“Labor pain,” she gasped out. Cullen stilled until he heard his wife’s breathing normalize and felt the tension leave her body. 

Athena groaned as she sat up and slid off of the bed to make her way to the garderobe. She didn't notice how much pain her husband was in. Several minutes later Duchess came out and was surprised to not find Cullen hovering over the door. Looking at the bed she saw that he was very pale and laying very still. Clambering on to the bed beside him she used her magic to take his pain away. Laying beside him she admonished, “If you continue to refuse sleep, my magic won’t be able to help you.”

“I’ve been a fool,” Cullen said softly. He opened brown eyes that were haunted with guilt. He gently pulled his wife close to him to hold her, “I should have listened to you, and I am very sorry we argued earlier.” 

Athena closed her eyes against the tears that threatened and whispered, “I’ll forgive you, provided that you take a nap with me.”

Cullen chuckled softly, “I think I can manage that.” 

“Good, because…” Athena stopped to groan.

Cullen had a hand resting on her large belly and felt it harden underneath his palm, “Breathe, love.”

Athena nodded and obeyed. Once the contraction had passed she finished her thought, “I get even less sleep when you aren’t here. It’s almost as if they know and want to go searching for you.”

Athena kissed him then and that was all the invitation Curly needed to make love to her, falling asleep afterwards. Duchess only slept for an hour as she had to use the garderobe and the babies decided it was a fine time to play. She didn’t want to disturb her peacefully sleeping husband with her restlessness, so she grabbed one of the books Morrigan had brought her and lounged, as best she could, on the couch until the servants brought in lunch and Mia.

Cullen woke and saw that his wife was starting to move, he shook his head at her, “Athena, if you’re comfortable, stay there.” 

Athena smiled at him and sank back in to her mountain of pillows. Cullen made a plate for her and brought it over to her. She took the scone off of it, and Cullen was concerned about her old habit of not eating coming back, “You still aren’t hungry?”

“Not really, no.”

“Our mother would stop eating about a day before she went in to labor,” Mia went to hug Athena. She was quite irritated with her brother, so, she focused her attention on Duchess, “You were able to rest? How are you feeling?”

“I was able to rest for a little and I’m ready to have my body back,” Athena shifted uncomfortably in her mountain of pillows. 

“Soon, love,” Cullen kissed her and then whispered, “after Mia leaves maybe we should try to bring on labor again?”

Athena chuckled and nodded. Mia asked, “I take it that you two worked out your issues?”

“We did,” Cullen answered for them both as Athena was squeezing his hand to keep from crying out. After the contraction passed Athena needed her husband’s assistance to get to the garderobe. Cullen crossed his arms as he waited for his wife. 

Since Athena was essentially out of the room, Mia decided it would be best to let Curly know how upset she was with him, “Why would you do this?”

“I was asleep, Mia. I would never intentionally hurt my wife,” Cullen was shocked and angry at the accusatory tone his sister was using.

“Not that,” Mia scoffed, thinking that this was not one of Cullen’s wiser moves. “What would ever possess you to think that not sleeping was a way to keep Athena from harm? She can’t sleep, you can. At least one of you needs to be not sleep deprived if decisions need to be made.”

“What are you trying to get at?” Now, Cullen was worried that something had happened while he was trying to cool off. But Athena didn’t say anything, he thought… Unless she forgot to tell him.

“Being in labor almost never goes according to a plan. She will be in pain and even more exhausted than she is right now. Athena will need you to have a clear head,” Mia informed him.

“I know all of this, Mia. Contrary to popular rumor, this isn’t the first time I’ve been around a pregnant woman.” Cullen was quickly losing his patience.

“But they weren’t your wife, and you have already seen Athena go through so much. You need to have a clear head when her labor starts in earnest.”

“Maker’s breath, Mia, I cannot go back in time to change what I’ve done. Athena’s forgiven me, why can’t you?”

“I’m sorry, it’s just that you’ve been through so much and you chose to put yourself through more… I don’t understand it,” Mia blushed, contrite with her confession.

Cullen shrugged, the frustration draining out of him and half teased, “What can I say? I’m a complex man.”

Mia chuckled softly, “That’s one way of putting it… Even as a boy you always put others before you. There was one time, you couldn’t have been more than five, and a couple kids had started yelling and pushing another child around, just because they were new and different. You stepped in front of the child and dared their tormentors to take you on. You must have been very imposing to them because they turned tail and ran.”

“Why does that not surprise me?” Athena sounded a bit breathless as she came out of the garderobe.

 

“Heard all that, did you?” Cullen uncrossed his arms to bring his wife close to him.

“I did and it is one of many reasons that I love you,” Athena stood on tiptoe to kiss him and gasped when it ended as her belly had tightened.

Athena closed her eyes, trying to tamp down on the sudden, crushing pain in her back that was marching toward her belly. Her breath was coming in short gasps and then she moaned loudly as her back and belly hardened into what she thought felt like silverite. 

“I’ll go get Ellendra,” Mia responded to Cullen’s worried glance and left.

It took several minutes for Ellendra to get to Duchess and another contraction started to when Ellendra finished her exam, “You’re well on your way, Athena. Do as much walking as possible.”

“What if she needs to use her abilities?” Cullen asked.

“So long as she is not too weak to push, I don’t have an issue with it,” Ellendra answered, “I’ll be in the main hall if I’m needed.”

As the door shut behind the healer, Athena murmured, “Right now, all I want to do is sleep.”

“Then sleep, love. I’m not going anywhere,” Cullen softly assured her as Athena drifted off to sleep in his arms, his hands gently rested on her large belly. Curly didn’t get a response from the babies or his wife and he smiled, knowing this part of the journey was coming to an end.

Athena moaned in her sleep every time a contraction took hold, and Cullen would lightly caress her until her belly softened again. After a few hours sleep Athena groaned upon waking. She was stiff and needed to use the garderobe. 

Sitting as far forward as her large belly would allow, Athena swung her feet to the ground. After several attempts to stand only to fall back to sitting on the bed, was she able to stay on her feet and shuffle to the water closet, using the wall for support. 

Cullen had dozed off and woke with a start when he didn’t feel his wife laying against him. Jumping out of bed, he tried to not panic. Then he heard Athena moan from the garderobe and he breathed a sigh of relief as he went over to wait for her. 

When Athena came out she was hunched over, and holding on to the door frame for support. Her husband smiled gently at her as he put a strong arm around her waist with his hand coming to rest on her belly. With her husband’s support Athena slowly straightened and released the door frame. As they walked away from the water closet, Cullen asked, “Would you like to dance?”

“I fear I won’t make a suitable dance partner.”

“We’ll go as slow as you need to,” Cullen said softly. 

Athena nodded and then gasped as one of the babies pressed down. Cullen looked at her quizzically, in answer she took his hand and put it underneath her belly where the babe was pressing. Cullen was surprised that his petite wife was still standing with the pressure the baby was putting on her. 

They slowly danced around the room and out on to the balconies, pausing every time Athena had a contraction, which were starting to happen with some frequency. They were on the east balcony when a particularly strong contraction left Athena gasping for air. Cullen led her to the couch so she could rest. 

The rest didn’t last long as Duchess became increasingly uncomfortable and got up to walk around. Whiling away the hours until dinner and the game our lovers walked up and down the stairs. They paused each time Athena had a contraction. On one such pause Athena was close to tears and fearfully whispered to herself, “How am I going to do this?”

“Do what?”

“We’re having twins, I only have one arm. I won’t be able to hold them at the same time, feed them, change their diapers. What if I’m feeding one and then the other one starts crying?”

“You send someone to get me,” Cullen’s voice was calm and reassuring.

“What if you can’t be found? What if you have to leave Skyhold? Oh Maker, what if I have to leave Skyhold?” Athena’s breath was coming in short, little gasps.

Cullen pulled his wife tight against him in an attempt to stay her trembling and tears, “Athena, we’ve already discussed this, neither one of us is going to be leaving for quite some time. I promise you that I will not venture far until you are comfortable being alone with them.”

Athena sagged against her husband in unspoken relief, and he held her until she was ready to move. Athena would have sworn that snails were moving faster than her on the walk up the stairs.

When they reached Cullen’s office he forced his wife to sit. As soon as her back touched the chair it went rigid and she moaned as any amount of tightness would bring on a contraction. Once the contraction passed Athena started to doze off and Cullen let her. About an hour later she woke. 

Bull, Ruffles, Sparkler, Mia, Morrigan, and I were there to play Wicked Grace. When Duchess came out of the garderobe and saw our little gathering she shook her head and stated quite emphatically, “No.”

“Duchess, for you, it’s no stakes, unless you want to bet on if we can get Curly or Sparkler to disrobe first,” I winked at her, hoping to tease some of the fear away from her eyes.

“To play Wicked Grace one has to be able to sit still and concentrate… I can’t do either right now,” Athena objected.

“Play one hand,” Cullen advised as they walked over to the table, which was in front of the couch laden with pillows.

“All we ask is that we gain your company. Whether you play, pretend to play, or get up to walk around every few minutes, it doesn’t matter to us,” I assured her.

Cullen sat on the couch and tried to take up as little room as possible. He had one leg stretched out on the couch and one foot on the floor so Athena could lay against him if she needed to. Duchess protested that too, “I’ll hurt you.”

“I’ve been through worse,” Curly refused to take no as an answer as he gently pulled her down.

“Why are you doing this?” Athena suspiciously questioned.

“After you give birth, I need to head back to Kirkwall,” I informed her, softening my tone as I saw her deflate a little with the news.

“You will keep in touch, yes?” Athena asked.

“Of course! Now, place your bets,” I said to everyone.

Athena wasn’t able to get through half of the hand she promised Cullen without getting up to walk around. We all exchanged somewhat nervous glances and Curly watched her closely, ready to jump if she needed help. When Athena came back to sit/lounge she was breathing heavily and sweating. Because of the contraction she sat down and Curly gently rubbed her back. The contraction passed and Duchess tried to relax against her husband. Athena lost miserably and afterwards she refused any offers of being dealt in.

That was how most of the game went until Sparkler suggested that I tell a story. As always, I was happy to oblige. I told of one of Hawke’s misadventures that involved Aveline’s wedding and Hawke and Blondie doing things they shouldn’t have been doing. Everyone laughed and Curly quipped looking down at his wife, “Sounds like our wedding day when I walked in on Bull and Josephine.”

“Commander!” Ruffles gasped, blushing.

“Do tell!” Sparkler exclaimed with the entire table agreeing with him. 

“This is not going to end well,” Athena murmured, closing her eyes and using the back of the couch to pull herself up to stretch out her back. 

Cullen smirked and launched in to his tale, “I was pacing on the dais waiting for Athena when several servants came running up to me saying that they couldn’t find the Ambassador and that Athena wasn’t cooperating-”

“They wanted to cut my hair,” Athena briefly interrupted to defend herself.

“They still didn’t know where our Lady Ambassador was,” Curly continued, getting us all to laugh several times…. Each time Duchess laughed she would have a contraction and then she would need to get up to use the garderobe or to walk around because she was restless. Cullen closed with, “So there Leliana and I stood, watching them make love for several minutes until Bull said, “Do you feel a breeze?” The funny thing was… They were on top of Athena’s favorite tower so I’m not certain what breeze he was talking about.”

“Red shot an arrow right over my bum,” Tiny grumbled.

We all lost it then, with tears streaming from our eyes, we gasped for precious air. Athena’s laughter was cut short by a very powerful contraction. Moaning she sat forward and panted for air. Cullen had been resting his hands on her large belly and felt it harden in to what felt like stormheart. 

Athena groaned as she stood, doubling over, she used her hand to hold on to things so she wouldn’t fall getting to the garderobe. With each slow step she made, we would hear her moan. Cullen followed her and would gently place his hands on her hips to steady her. 

Duchess leaned against the door, gasping for air when her stomach and back tightened even further causing her to cry out. With a rush, water poured out of her. Morrigan and Ruffles grabbed towels and put them on the floor around Athena and then grabbed a nightshift for her to wear. As the contraction eased, Cullen ripped the soaking wet dress off of her and assisted in putting the night shift on. 

“On the bed, Athena. We need to see how far you are,” Morrigan was the voice of authority. 

Cullen carried his wife to their bed as another contraction claimed her. Morrigan waited until the contraction had passed to examine our heroine. She pressed down on Athena’s belly to see where the babes were and checked to see if she was able to start pushing. Morrigan stood and informed Duchess, “You are half way there.”

Athena groaned, that was not what she wanted to hear. Speaking softly to not let on how afraid she was, “I don’t think I can do this.”

“You do not have much choice now, my friend,” Morrigan responded, “When I was in labor with Kieran I walked up and down stairs until I felt the urge to push.”

“And how long did that take?” Athena asked.

“Several hours, but I had only started having contractions a couple days before my water broke. You have been having them for quite some time, and the babes are fully dropped,” Morrigan tried to give her friend some hope.

Athena bit her lip to keep from crying out and drew blood. As soon as the contraction passed Cullen ordered, “You will not be biting your lip anymore. I would rather you scream in my ear than cause more pain to what you are already going through.”

Athena nodded with grateful tears in her eyes and moved to get off the bed. Cullen put an arm around her waist and Athena hissed in pain. He immediately pulled back and looked to Morrigan, “Walk with her and keep her from falling, touch her back or belly if only ‘tis absolutely necessary. Do not go any further than your office.”

Athena slowly made her way to the stairs and moaned as she stepped down on to the first stair and gripped the railing so tight that her knuckles were white. Each step sent fresh waves of pain through Curly’s wife and he could do nothing to take away the pain, as much as he wanted to. Once they made the agonizingly slow march down the stairs and around Cullen’s office (Duchess’ idea,) they stopped so Athena could catch her breath. Cullen took her hand, bending carefully to not touch her belly, and gently kissed her, “I love you.”

Athena was breathing heavily after the kiss and whispered, “I love you, too.”

A slow trek from Cullen’s office to the stairs went smoothly, as Athena went to ascend the stairs, her belly hardened with a labor pain and she stumbled. Cullen caught her before she could fall. Athena was breathing heavily and Cullen was waiting for his wife to stumble again. They ascended the stairs, Athena hanging on to her husband’s waist so she wouldn’t fall.   
Morrigan checked Athena again and told her that the stairs had helped. Cullen snorted, “There will be no more stairs. If Athena needs to walk she can do it here.”

Athena struggled to get out of bed and walked to the balcony after her husband disappeared into the garderobe. When Cullen finished, he came out on to the balcony. He stood behind his wife and gently placed both hands on her shoulders. Athena broke in to sobs, and whispered brokenly, “I can’t do this.”

Cullen wanted desperately to take her in to his arms, but didn’t want to cause her even more pain. He opted to reassure her, “You survived a trip from Ostwick to the Temple of Sacred Ashes by yourself. For a time, an elven magic decided to make you its bearer. You stopped a war between the mages, the Chantry, and the Templars, and you defeated Corypheus. I have no doubt that you can do this.”

“Except for the anchor, none of them felt like I was being ripped apart from the inside,” Athena argued and then groaned as another contraction took control, she begged, “Hold me?”

That was all Cullen needed to hear; he wrapped her in his warm and strong embrace. Athena moaned but wrapped her hand around his arm so tightly that he would have had to hurt her to pull away from her. They stood that way for a while, every couple minutes Athena would cry out in pain, her grip involuntarily tightening on her husband. Cullen never flinched or moved to pull away from the discomfort she was causing him, knowing that it was nothing compared to what she was going through. 

As the sun sent its first rays over the mountains Athena released her husband and held on to the railing. Grunting, she started to slide out of his arms like she was going to sit. Morrigan saw what was going on and demanded, “Get her inside, now.”

Cullen picked Athena up and winced as she cried out, because he knew he was hurting her, but he didn’t want their children being born outside where there was limited room. He was also concerned that they wouldn’t be able to move Athena once the babes were born. When he reached the bed, he gently laid his wife on it and arranged the pillows behind her so she was semi-sitting. 

Athena panted with the next contraction and groaned as she felt a great pressure to push. Morrigan placed a hand on Athena’s belly to feel when the next contraction hit, while they were waiting she explained, “When the next contraction starts, I want you to push. Cullen you are going to have to help her by holding her shoulders.”

Cullen nodded and smiled at his wife, “Almost there.”

Athena’s contraction started and Morrigan informed her, “’Tis time to push, my friend.”

Athena groaned as she did so, reaching out to hold on to her knees. After several pushes the first babe came out. Mia’s grin was wide as she caught the babe, “It’s a girl!” A couple minutes later a boy followed. 

Duchess was utterly exhausted but was anxious to hold and feed her babies. Cullen held the boy as the girl was fed and helped his wife support the child she was holding. Athena whispered, “Hello baby Rein.”

When Rein was sated, they traded babies and Athena whispered, “Hello baby Liam.” When Liam finished eating, she handed him back to his father and snuggled down in to the pillows, falling fast asleep. Cullen put the babies in their cradles and slept in the chair beside his wife, holding her hand.

Mia and Morrigan stayed with the new parents to make sure they got as much rest as they could. Little Rein and little Liam woke about every two hours to eat. Once Athena was done feeding them either Morrigan or Mia would take the babes away to burp them and change them.

Athena woke in the middle of the night needing to use the garderobe. She moaned as she tried to get out of bed, her body still sore from giving birth. Cullen heard her and opened his eyes to see his wife sitting on the edge of the bed, “Where do you think you’re going?”

“The garderobe,” Athena answered.

“I guess that’s an acceptable response,” Cullen gently teased, smiling at his disheveled wife.

Poor Athena was still too exhausted and sore to take note of his teasing, “Will you help me?”

“Always, my love,” Cullen stood, took Athena’s hand, and gently wrapped an arm around her waist after she stood. They slowly walked to the garderobe and Curly had much less of a wait this time. When Duchess came out the babes were awake and hungry. Cullen brought them to her after she was settled on the bed. As he was about to pull away Athena placed a hand on his and gently shook her head. Cullen smiled as he watched one of the babies eat, looking up at his wife he said, “I thought you were beautiful before… Now…”

“We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I love you, Cullen,” Athena said as they switched babies.

“I love you too, Athena.” Cullen said with tears in his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos (if you want) are appreciated!


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